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by Lani
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1455359
My musings, my rambles and I welcome you.
Hourglass & quill

*Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* LIVE WITH INTENTION. *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1**Flower1**Flower1*

*Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* WALK TO THE EDGE. *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6*

*Flower2* *Flower2* *Flower2* CHOOSE WITH NO REGRETS.. *Flower2* *Flower2* *Flower2*

*Flower1**Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* DANCE IN THE LIGHT*Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1*

*Flower6* *Flower6* APPRECIATE MY FAMILY & FRIENDS. *Flower6* *Flower6*

BCOF Insignia

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October 13, 2020 at 2:24pm
October 13, 2020 at 2:24pm
I cannot believe it has been 10 months since my last entry and yet I can. So much has happened and is happening that finding time to write is becoming a distant memory. I haven't been here much in last 3-4 years because my health is stupid. Its not poor or sickly but stupid as in I'm stupid. If I had made better choices as a young person I wouldn't be reaping what I sowed. A reminder to young whippersnappers *BigSmile* to eat their veggies, take your Calcium and use good body mechanics when lifting.

Covid has passed by my house (thanks be to God) but I broke my hip in August. I'm just now ready for outpatient rehab and I am doing a bunch or mindless strength training exercises for my hip and back. I need some suggestions for music to make this a little for fun. What gets your heart going? makes your toes tap or or just makes you smile? I have some music on my iPod/phone but its going to get boring fast if I don't have a large playlist.

Here's where I am starting
Carrie Underwood: I am the Champion
Survivor: Eye the Tiger
Rocky's theme
ELO: Mr. Blue Sky
Katrina and the Waves: Walking on Sunshine
MercyMe: Greater
Brandon Heath: Give Me Your Eyes
Aaron Jeoffrey: I got to the Rock

So as you can see I am a fan of 80's pop and rock and Christian rock and praise. Any suggestions will be greatly appreciated

January 1, 2020 at 9:52pm
January 1, 2020 at 9:52pm
Is it really 2020? Where did the time go? And where are the Jetsons and their flying cars, robots and everything? 2020. Doesn't that seem like such a space age-y year? Good grief we haven't even made it to Mars except in the movies. However if Alexa or Siri came with Majel Barrett's voice (the voice of the Star Trek computer) I would freak out.

All of this to Happy 2020. May the New Year be a blessed one for all of us.
December 24, 2019 at 2:51pm
December 24, 2019 at 2:51pm
Its hard to have traditions when jobs and schedule mean that either my dear hubby or myself will be working. Most of our traditions are around food when we finally get to celebrate. But even our food is not traditional holiday fare. After Thanksgiving, we're turkeyed out and neither of us care for ham, so our traditional meal is steak.

However my favorite Christmas Eve tradition is a good book, a fire and counting blessings.

Christmas Eve

Snuggled up
by the fire,
rests the dog.

surround the tree
with a soft glow.

In the late night
I sip my tea.

those I love
most slumber .

With a sigh,
I head for
my bed.

Grateful to God
that those I love
best are home.
April 19, 2019 at 4:22pm
April 19, 2019 at 4:22pm
Professional, Busy,
Educating, Helping, Advocating
Many roles, many hands

Line count:5

Line A: One vague or general one-word subject or topic.
Line B: Two vivid adjectives that describe the topic.
Line C: Three interesting “-ing” action verbs that fit the topic.
Line D: Four-word phrase that captures feeling about the topic.
Line E: A very specific term that explains Line A

I enjoy writing poetry but I love Nursing. I wrote this Cinquain about 10 years ago for National Nurses Week which happens every May. It has never been published until now.

Some of you know that I am a Neonatal and Level 2 nursery nurse. I want to tell you a story of why I love my job.

I was working nights and I was doing an assessment on my patient. She was a little tiny boo who had just been weaned off the ventilator and was still fragile.

"So girl-friend, your heart sounds good, " I say in a sing-song voice. "No murmur, you lungs are clear, tummy is good at 21 cm (8.26 in). Mmmm, your pulses are strong. Way to go girl-friend." I hum a little tune as I continue the exam.
"Oh look at those cute little toesies and fingers. No bath tonight since you are just off the vent..."

A chuckle interrupted my flow.

"Oh Miss Lani, I love how you talk to the babies! It's not baby talk." said a mom who was close by holding her child.

Slightly embarrassed to be caught talking to the baby, I said, " I know but the chatter keeps me on track for what I need to do and I say it a baby talk voice. The babies hear the higher tones a little better. So it doesn't matter what I say but how I say it. Plus I like to let them what is happening. They may not understand my words but they understand tone. I feel sometimes I am speaking to their spirits."

"That is so sweet," she replied.

I went on with my shift and didn't think too much about the conversation. Although I became more aware of who was listening and what I was saying to the babies.

Several months later, I was working the day shift and I was called to the front desk for a visitor with a baby.

"You don't remember me do you?" said a smartly dressed lady hold a small baby in her arms. "A few months ago, I told you I liked your baby talk."

"Oh yes, your little one went home last month. How is she doing?"

"Great, we're here for a check-up. And I want to thank you."

"Me?" I said "But I only took care of your baby maybe twice during her hospitalization."

"Because I am a first time mother. A single mother. I don't know a lot a children and less about babies until now. Your calm demeanor, your precious baby talk showed me the way. I just needed to keep calm and talk to her about what is going to happen. It keeps me on task and it keeps me from losing my cool. And it helped me bond to my baby."

I must've looked as dumbfounded as I felt. She hugged me and then talked with some of the other nurses and doctors who took care of her child.

"Good job." said my charge nurse patting my shoulder. "You never really know when something you say or do will make a difference so someone."

That's why I love my job.

April 1, 2019 at 11:34pm
April 1, 2019 at 11:34pm
[in Just-]

by e.e. cummings

in Just-

spring when the world is mud-
luscious the little
lame balloonman

whistles far and wee

and eddieandbill come
running from marbles and
piracies and it's

when the world is puddle-wonderful

the queer
old balloonman whistles
far and wee
and bettyandisbel come dancing

from hop-scotch and jump-rope and




balloonMan whistles

I love this poem because the imagery in the poem is so vivid and magical. I picture a man hobbling down the street with his balloons to sell calling children with his recognizable whistle. A neighborhood (world) that is mud-luscious and puddle-wonderful. Can you not hear the kids splashing puddles as they run to meet him?
When I read this work, I realize the physical words of the poem can help tell the story. The placement of the words on the page can set the tone.

Far and wee is the sound the whistle makes. I can hear a low sound but a long sound from how the words are place.
And can you not picture two out of breath boys (eddieandbill) trying to catch the balloonman?

The whole poem is fun and magical and it's spring on paper.

I wrote several poem in the e.e. cummings style. I hope I did him proud.

October 3, 2017 at 11:03pm
October 3, 2017 at 11:03pm
A myth... is a metaphor for a mystery beyond human comprehension. It is a comparison that helps us understand, by analogy, some aspect of our mysterious selves. A myth, in this way of thinking, is not an untruth but a way of reaching a profound truth.” ~Christopher Vogler Do you agree or disagree? What's your favorite myth?

Love Brings

Whirling, swirling,
so goes life.
As Sisyphus rolls his rock
toward the abyss,
Man's unending falling
Into a darkness

Faces, voices,
life gone by.
Passions dried,
but not the tears;
framing withering

Sweetly sipped,
from another's lips,
only Love breaks through
bringing Man
hope, light, life
back from the

My favorite myth is Sisyphus. Well, maybe not favorite but one that I understand. It's real life. Sisyphus is the king of Ephya. He promotes navigation and commerce so he is a good guy. But wait, he kills travelers and guests so he is a bad guy.

Sisyphus is also sly, charming and cunning. He annoyed Zeus by betraying one of the god's secrets to a river god for a mountain spring. Killing guests breaks hospitality laws of Zeus so he orders Death (or Hades depending on your version) to put Sisyphus in chains in Tartarus. The king talked Death into putting the chains on himself, you know to see how they worked. No one could die until Death was freed.
In another story Sisyphus tricks the Queen of the Dead Persephone into letting him leave the Underworld. He convinced her he was there by mistake.

For his hubris of believing he was smarter than the gods, Zeus has Sisyphus rolling a rock up a hill only to have it roll back down before he can complete the task. Unending frustration and wasted effort is his hell for his clever mind.

I believe that Mr. Vogler is right that myth is metaphor for human mysteries. As for Sisyphus, the mystery is why would a king with so many gifts (a rich country, a family, a clever mind and a charming way) throw it all away? Why break the laws of basic decency? How did he come to believe that he was better or smarter than the gods?

Why do we?

October 1, 2017 at 10:42am
October 1, 2017 at 10:42am
"Bittersweet October,
the mellow, messy, leaf-kick, perfect pause between the opposing miseries of summer and

Carol Bishop Hipps
December 24, 2014 at 9:59pm
December 24, 2014 at 9:59pm
Prompt: What is your favorite Christmas story to tell on Christmas Eve? If you don't have a favorite Christmas story write Christmas story.

What was he doing behind Santa's sleigh? And heading toward North America, how did that happen, wondered Ronald. Assembling the team was one of his Christmas Eve chores. His ears twitched with worry when he saw his mother enter the hanger instead of Santa.

“Ronnie, your Dad is ill and can’t fly tonight. Doctors orders.”

“Can’t fly? It’s Christmas Eve.”

“I know son, and all those children counting on us, on you. Here’s your dad’s ring. Wear it in his honor.”

“In his honor? How sick is he? Is he going to die? Can I see him? I thought he, we were immortals.”

“Calm down Ronnie. The doctor just wants him to rest. As to being immortal, maybe he doesn’t need to be with all his sons now in place. Finish up so you can get started. I know you are going to make us both proud.” She opened her arms for a hug.

He wasn’t so sure of that, but hugged his mom anyway. When she broke the hold, he could see the worry lines on her face. I don’t know whether I’m the cause of those or Dad and I not sure what I hope the answer is, thought Ronald. As his mom left the hanger, he heard


Ronald looked down to see the elf assigned as his crew chief.

“Could we go over your final checklists now?”

“Sure. Let me find the clipboards. I’m sure they’re here somewhere.”


Ronald hoped that the reindeer knew where they were going. And that the elves assigned to help him couldn't see how his hands shook holding the reins. It was one thing to ride with Dad these past 90 years, but to actually take the route made Ronald's hands shake harder. Fortunately, it was only the North American route he had to cover. His brothers were already covering their own well established territories. Michael was Father Christmas in Great Britain, Joel, Pere Noel in France, Herman, Christindl in Germany and so on. They promised to help if Ronald got behind. He needed to do this on his own if only to prove he was more than the only screw-up in a large prefect family.

Christmas just wasn’t Christmas without a good naturally brotherly ribbing about his latest mishap. Like the time he was very young, just 30, and took the reindeer for a joy ride while Dad was putting toys under a child’s tree. Ronald nearly fell out of the sleigh when his dad appeared behind him. Or the time the he was in charge of the flying team. He started them on a new and improved feed corn days before Christmas. Unfortunately, the feed didn’t agree with the reindeer and the secondary team had to be used. The team, composed of a motley crew of retired veterans and tyros, made for a wild ride that year. The jokes seemed never ending especially from his brothers.

Every year he got better at the route, but Ronald dreaded the day his dad would hand over the reins. Last year, he forgot the Naughty and Nice list.

“I thought that was the elves’ job.”

“It’s your job to oversee the operation,” Ronald saw the disappointment in his father’s eyes.


"Okay Santa, here we are at the first house," said Dash bringing Ronald back to the present.

"Don't call me that. That's Dad's name!"

The elf looked up from the list that he held. "Santa is the office. Kris is your Dad's name as in Kris Kringle."

"Tonight you are Santa, Ronald. Don't worry. We'll help and after the first house it gets easier." said Dot who was loading the knapsack.

"Look, guys. I've ridden with Dad lots of times, but I don't know all of this really works. When I would ask, he just said magic. How do I go down the chimneys and get back up without being seen? How do I know what to leave? What about alarms? What if someone sees me? "Ronald's words came out in a rush.

The elves looked at each other concerned and then turned to Ronald. Dash, the more experienced elf, asked," Did your Dad give you a ring tonight? It has a star on it."

"Actually Mom gave it to me. She said to wear it tonight in honor of Dad." He held out his right hand and the elves saw a large ring with a bright green stone that shined like as a star.

Both elves let out a sigh of relief.

"It's alright then," said Dash. "The ring is the source of Santa's magic. It was given to him by Mother Nature when he took office. Transports you from the roof to the Christmas tree. Going down chimneys is a myth. Makes you invisible when you need to be. Lets you walk through wall. "

"Although, some children, who are true believers, will see through the invisibility." said Dot.”I got your knapsack packed. Ready for your first house?"

"As ready as I can be. How do you start this thing?" Ronald said nodding toward the ring.

"Uh...I don't know," said Dot. "Dash?"

"We're just the delivery boys, not Santa. He never told you in all those ride?"

Ronald thought about it. Santa always twisted the ring and smiled and disappeared before his eyes.

"Maybe he thinks about getting by the tree after he twists the ring." he told the elves.

"Try it now. We're running behind," urged Dash.

Ronald gave the ring a nervous twist and put on a tight smile and disappeared. The Christmas tree glowed with a familiar light.

"Ronald! What in the Name of Mother Nature are you doing back here!" thundered Santa. Sitting in his favorite chair by the fire, he looked anything but sick. Ronald was too surprised to be in his own home to notice.

"Dad! I twisted the ring, smiled and ended up back here! he cried. "I don't know what happened."

"Did you say the child's name?" his dad asked.

"I didn't know that part of it." Ronald said lowering his eyes.

"It's okay son. My fault. I forgot to tell you and the elves. Just say the name of the child or the place where you want to be after twisting the ring. Now say sleigh and get out here!"

Still in a bit of shock, Ronald did what he was told and found himself on the same roof with Dash and Dot.

"Well let’s get this show on the road." said Ronald to the relieved elves. "I need the name of the child we are visiting tonight."

"Shondra Marks, Santa." promptly replied Dash keeper of the list.

"Okay, here we go," said Ronald as he twisted his ring then whispered the name. His smile was weak, but a small twinkle lit his eyes. With hardly time to finish whispering her name, he appeared next to Shondra's tree. Unloading the gifts turned out to be easy as Dot had only put into the knapsack what he needed. It all took less time than he expected. Before he could say Hot Chocolate, he was on to the next house.

And so it went. Ronald popped into a house by the Christmas tree, delivered the presents, ate a cookie, drank some milk and popped back up to the sled for the next house.

"Santa, I wrote a list, but I don't want anything on it now." said a teary girl named Katelyn. "My daddy is out of work and needs a job. Can you get him a job? Please. He works on car and trucks. Daddy says you can't help us, but I know you can." Her face was resolute.

Surprised, Ronald dropped his bag when the little girl spoke to him. He listened to the girl talk and tried to think of a solution. Maybe Dad can help her later," mused Ronald. "I'll do what I can,” he said gently. "Now it’s time to get into bed."

“Hey Dash, what does Dad do when a child asks for something in the middle of the night?” Ronald inquired after he got back to the sleigh.

“I suppose it depends on what the child wants. If it’s a toy, we try to accommodate them. If it’s something like world peace, well that’s something humans have to work out themselves.”

“And if it’s a job for a parent?”

“I’m not sure, but he always seems to know what to do.”

Ronald sighed. That answer wasn’t much help. He didn’t have the experience yet for this job.

As the night went on, Ronald grew more confident. He was in and out most homes almost at his Dad’s speed according to the elves. Dogs either ignored him or shared his plate of cookies. They seem to realize he was not there to rob the house. He talked to two more children who waited up for him, but their requests were not as serious as Katelyn’s. She remained on his mind for the rest of the trip.

“This is the last house here, and then we move onto California,” said Dot the navigator. “It should be easier there. Not so many children believe in Santa in that state.”

“Seems sad,” said Ronald before he disappeared.

When he arrived at the Christmas tree, he found a weary father was putting together a bicycle.

"I'm so tired from all the overtime at the shop. Now it’s Christmas Eve and I'm seeing things," mumbled a bleary-eyed father.

By now Ronald had better idea of how his ring worked. He twisted it and whispered fix bicycle. The tired father jumped back as the bike assembled itself.

"Hey Santa, you wouldn't happen to have an auto mechanic in your bag would you? My shop is overflowing with work and no competent help," said the tired dad.

Ronald smiled and melted before his surprised eyes. The dad would find a note in his stocking with the phone number of Katelyn’s dad.

The first fingers of dawn were lighting the sky when Ronald turned the sleight North. Dot and Dash exhausted from the night labors, snored in the back seat.

Finished on time without my brother's help, Ronald thought. And Dad will have a new story to tell. I really surprised him at the fireplace. But Dad didn’t tell stories, he continued his musings. The elves told the stories and his brothers made the jokes especially his eldest brothers Herman and Nick who covered Turkey and parts of the Middle East. Dad made them stop the reindeer poop jokes after the feed corn disaster. And he insisted I continue to ride with him, even during my rebellious 30’s. Dad has always been on my side, Ronald marveled.

“Getting sick on Christmas Eve my asteroid! Pushing me out of the nest is more Dad's speed. I can't wait to thank him." Ronald’s grateful laugh woke the elves as they were making the final turn toward home.
November 17, 2014 at 11:35pm
November 17, 2014 at 11:35pm
Day 730: Monday, November 17, 2014
Prompt: What does getting old mean to you? Write a story, write a poem, write a rant; whichever you want..

If only I were prettier.
If only I were smarter.
If only I could talk easier
to friends as well as strangers.

If only I were closer to God.
If only He were closer to me.
Somewhere we could meet
and I could say the sorrow that I feel is more than superficial

If only Love and friendship were easier for me,
not mysteries and miseries of heartache.
From missteps and blunders of
trying too hard or not enough.

If only the fantasies of my mind were not easier
to find than the real world.
If only real world was not so real nor so harsh
and retreat not so easy.

If only the words came as easily as the tears.
Regret sits in my heart and will not be moved.
If only I knew then what I know now,
so much could be avoided or is this inevitable?
This middle age lament?

October 31, 2014 at 11:35pm
October 31, 2014 at 11:35pm
Prompt: Happy Halloween, Happy All Hallow's Eve, Happy All Saint's Eve, Samhain or Calan Gaeaf

What traditions or customs exist where you ? Is there mumming and guising? Is there trick or treating? Are there festivals?

Do you see this as a Pagan celebration? If you live where this is not celebrated is this custom similar to this that you would like to share.

I posted this entry 5 years ago and my view have not changed except that C.S. Lewis and Screwtape have become a little tradition.

How do you celebrate Halloween?

This time of year is always full of seasonal pleasures: apple cider, cooler weather, bluer skies and little kids in costumes
The question is do you celebrate Halloween? My own history with the holiday (is it a holiday?) is sporadic and not the norm so my views are a little skewed. But they are mine and I hope to learn of others.
I grew up not really celebrating Halloween. My parents had no religious reasons, but rather, safety issues. I grew up in a neighborhood that was poor and unsafe for trick or treats. And my Mom didn't have time, money or energy to waste on the day. We usually got treats at school. If there was money, we got had cider, donuts and whatever candy had been on sale at K-mart. Dressing up in costumes would have been pointless and expensive.
As I got older, I put the day aside as a day for kids. It wasn't something I thought about. I was working, in school and getting out poverty.
When I became I Christian, Halloween took on a whole new context. There seem to be two camps of thought about the day.
1. It was an evil day. Witches, ghost and monsters symbolize Halloween and are creatures of evil. We shouldn't have anything to do with it.
2. It's a harmless day of fun for kids. What's wrong with letting them dress up, eat candy and play
Now those arguments are very simplified. I know somewhere there is evidence for both sides.
Personally, I believe that everyday belongs to the Lord. There are no evil days.
"This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad."
Psalm 118:24
And yet, Halloween in recent years concerns me. The recent rise in popularity of witches, vampires and zombies is enough to give me pause. Harry Potter made witchcraft not just for housewives. (Sorry Bewitched fans.) Vampires have always been sexy. Dracula has been played by many gorgeous guys. Frank Langella in Dracula and Chris Sarandon in Fright Night were two of my favorites. The Twilight series brought a tween level of sexiness to the garlic haters. Zombies are so hot that they have made their way into such classics as Pride and Prejudice.

The thing is Halloween makes evil things to be cute or good. If evil is cute, then it is dangerous. Face it, anything or anybody that wants to suck your blood, your life source, is evil. (vampires) Anything that wants to eat your flesh is evil.(zombies) Anyone with power that does not come from God comes from someone or something else. (witches)
Where is this going? I dunno. It's my blog and I can ramble if I want.
I guess I am just a little perplexed at the rise of the heroes formerly known as monsters.
"C.S. Lewis said, "There are two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils. One is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe, and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them. They themselves are equally pleased by both errors and hail a materialist or a magician with the same delight."
I'm glad I never had to decide as a parent what to do about Halloween. As a Christian, it’s easy to fall into the extremes as Lewis points out. So I think this season I'm going to reread "The Screwtape Letters" by Lewis. It is a series of letters from a senior demon to an underling about how to tempt and control his "patient." Patient is the demon's word for mortal men and women. Lewis had some wonderful things to say about Christianity and our culture. It seems appropriate, for the season, to be reading about demons. *Wink*
Now, like Charlie Brown, awaiting your rocks.


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