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by Lani
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1455359
My musings, my rambles and I welcome you.
Hourglass & quill

*Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* LIVE WITH INTENTION. *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1**Flower1**Flower1*

*Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* WALK TO THE EDGE. *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6* *Flower6*

*Flower2* *Flower2* *Flower2* CHOOSE WITH NO REGRETS.. *Flower2* *Flower2* *Flower2*

*Flower1**Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* DANCE IN THE LIGHT*Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1* *Flower1*

*Flower6* *Flower6* APPRECIATE MY FAMILY & FRIENDS. *Flower6* *Flower6*

BCOF Insignia

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October 8, 2009 at 9:33am
October 8, 2009 at 9:33am
This time of year is always full of seasonal pleasures: apple cider, cooler weather, bluer skies and little kids in costumes.
The question is do you celebrate Halloween? My own history with the holiday (is it a holiday?) is sporadic and not the norm so my views are a little skewed. But they are mine and I hope to learn of others.

I grew up not really celebrating Halloween. My parents had no religious reasons, but rather, safety issues. I grew up in a neighborhood that was poor and unsafe for trick or treats. And my Mom didn't have time, money or energy to waste on the day. We usually got treats at school. If there was money, we got had cider, donuts and whatever candy had been on sale at K-mart. Dressing up in costumes would have been pointless and expensive.

As I got older, I put the day aside as a day for kids. It wasn't something I thought about. I was working, in school and getting out poverty.

When I became I Christian, Halloween took on a whole new context. There seem to be two camps of thought about the day.

1. It was an evil day. Witches, ghost and monsters symbolize Halloween and are creatures of evil. We shouldn't have anything to do with it.

2. It's a harmless day of fun for kids.What's wrong with letting them dress up, eat candy and play?

Now those arguments are very simplified. I know somewhere there is evidence for both sides.

Personally, I believe that everyday belongs to the Lord. There are no evil days.

"This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad."
Psalm 118:24

And yet, Halloween in recent years concern me. The recent rise in popularity of witches, vampires and zombies is enough to give me pause. Harry Potter made witchcraft not just for surban housewives. (Sorry Bewitched fans.) Vampires have always been sexy. Dracula has been played by many gorgeous guys. Frank Langella in Dracula and Chris Sarandon in Fright Night were two of my favorites. The Twilight series brought a tween level of sexiness to the garlic haters. Zombies are so hot that they have made their way into such classics as Pride and Prejudice.

The thing is Halloween makes evil things to be cute or good. If evil is cute, then it is dangerous. Face it, anything or anybody that wants to suck your blood, your life source, is evil. (vampires) Anything that wants to eat your flesh is evil.(zombies) Anyone with power that does not come from God comes from someone or something else. (witches)

Where is this going? I dunno. It's my blog and I can ramble if I want.

I guess I am perplexed at the rise of the heroes formerly known as monsters.

"C.S. Lewis said,"There are two equal and opposite errors into which our race can fall about the devils. One is to disbelieve in their existence. The other is to believe, and to feel an excessive and unhealthy interest in them. They themselves are equally pleased by both errors and hail a materialist or a magician with the same delight."

I'm glad I never had to decide as a parent what to do about Halloween. As a Christian, its easy to fall into the extremes as Lewis points out. So I think this season I'm going to reread "The Screwtape Letters" by Lewis. It is a series of letters from a senior demon to an underling about how to tempt and control his "patient." Patient being the demon's word for men and women. Lewis had some wonderful things to say about Christianity and our culture. It seems appropriate, for the season, to be reading about demons. *Wink*

Now, like Charlie Brown, awaiting your rocks.

September 6, 2009 at 4:00pm
September 6, 2009 at 4:00pm
On Vacation and I may or may not have stories to tell. I'm driving back home to visit family. The Mid-West is such an interesting place. I was puzzled, bemused and finally a little horrified (or was that digusted?) to see a Bob Evan's biscuit and gravy machine at one of the gas station/express stores. Some things cannot be explained.
till later
August 21, 2009 at 1:40am
August 21, 2009 at 1:40am
I got this in an e-mail today. I thought I would pass it on if anyone was interested.

Low Country Patriots,

We will be joining other patriots around the nation in scheduled Recess Rallies on August 22, 2009. Our elected representatives are on summer vacation...thank God...no more damage until September when recess is over. These rallies are in protest of H.R.3200 and any other attempts to further socialize the United States of America through taking over and socializing our healthcare system. Please pass the word and join the protest this Saturday at 12:00 noon, in downtown Charleston, at the Customs House located at 200 East Bay Street. There will be lots of music and Big Talkers...You can't miss us! It will be over by 1:00pm or 1:30pm latest.

Sorry for the short notice, it developed late nationally, so there wasn't much notice.

Ron Parks
Patriots Of Charleston, Charleston Tea Party.Org

I wonder how much news coverage it will get?
August 17, 2009 at 11:15am
August 17, 2009 at 11:15am
He called last month reminding me of the time we spent together all those years ago.
He wants to get together again now especially with my husband out of town. He reminds me of the fun we had, the music we shared, the ah....flexibility.
He reminds me that we could start slow, take walks, and enjoy nature.
I’m tempted, but it’s been so long. Why would I want to start something like that now?
Still, I want to feel beautiful and sexy and he does that for me. After we’re all hot and sweaty together that is.

I guess I better end this before it gets too far. *Bigsmile**Wink*My old trainer from the gym called. He wants me to resign. The above misdirection seemed funnier than whining about my weight or lack of motivation for exercise. Low thyroid, peri-menopause, old foot surgery and just plain sloth are NOT good reasons for NOT exercising. In fact, they are probably reasons TO exercise or at least to maintain a more reasonable weight than what I am now.

I could *Pthb* go back to Weight Watcher's and jump start the gym. I am going on vacation soon so I would like to find a little more stamina than I usually have.

Now where's the gym bag?

beach signature of my name
July 29, 2009 at 1:32pm
July 29, 2009 at 1:32pm
Stacy came into the formula room looking puzzled. She opened the cabinet doors and rummaged through the shelves. I nearly jumped out of my skin when she slammed the last door in frustration. Kathy, my mentor for Newborn Intensive Care (NICU), asked, “What’s wrong?”

“Sandy sent me in here for pigeon’s milk and I can’t find it.”

I started to say something, but Kathy nudged me. “I think we’re out, but it’s on order.”

“Great, now what do I feed the baby?”

“Who is it?”

She told us and Kathy said,” Ah, post surgery baby. That’s why they want the pigeon’s milk.”

“Look, are you pulling my leg? I never heard of pigeon’s milk.”

“Are you kidding? Everyone knows about pigeon’s milk. It’s easy for the preemies to digest. Its’ 30-40 calorie an ounce and it’s got those easy to digest medium chain fatty acids for brain development.” Kathy took on the persona of a cross between a used car salesman and a sideshow carney. “Look it up. You’re going to look stupid when it comes in tomorrow.”

Stacy left the formula room more befuddled than when she entered. I turned to Kathy.

“What was that all about?”

“What kind of fool lives on this earth 22 years and doesn’t know that birds lay eggs? Just testing the new talent.”

We walked back to our baby’s isolette.

“Just testing the new talent, huh. Are you going to pull something like that on me?”

“Of course not. You’ve been a nurse, what 5-6 years, right.”

“Yeah, but adult Medical-Surgical and NICU are two different worlds.”

“Not that different. There’s Dr. Armstrong. Ask him if we can wean (turn down) baby Smith’s oxygen to 18 percent.”


I walk over to the resident and started to ask my question, when I realized what I was about to ask. Ventilators don’t go below 21 percent, because that is what we breathe in normal air.

I glared at Kathy as I walked back to her.

She smiled, “Just testing the new talent."

This story is true sort of. The pigeon's milk story was told to me third hand. I changed the names and circumstances to protect the silly. The 18 percent story is mine. I'm not sure I want to share the one where they "got" me.

beach signature of my name
July 27, 2009 at 12:22pm
July 27, 2009 at 12:22pm
I was listening to Waking the Dead by John Eldredge on my iPod when he said to stop listening and think. Think about all the things you love and I thought of all of these things. Real life is too real sometimes (especially right now) and it’s good to count your blessing.

I love God.
I love that he loves me in spite of my flaws. Maybe He doesn’t see them. God monitors black holes across the galaxies but still cares about me and the sparrow. (Luke12:6-7)
I marvel that He cared enough about me to want to know what it was like to be me. He became man to know my fears, my sorrows and my joys. I have a God and Savior who can truly empathize. (Hebrews 4:15)

I love my husband.
I love that he is a man’s man. Former military, he loves hunting, fishing and guns. He’s not a know nothing jar head either. He reads. He loves spy novels, history, economics and politics. I love how he takes care of me. He makes me feel very female and very beautiful.

I love my work.
I love the babies, watching their personalities unfold. I love taking care of the families. The process from fear to awe to “When is he coming home?!” is amazing. I love working with my fellow nurses and being part of a team. Some days just flow when the team is “on.”

I love reading.
To disappear into a well crafted story is the ultimate magic. I want to be the solver of riddles, the warrior princess or the one who lives the adventure with her hero.

I love poetry
But not the ornate flowery kind. I love using everyday words that show extraordinary emotions or stories or humor.

I love writing.
I love a well turned phrase and when the words flow, it’s magic. I love puns and irony. The right word in the right place and time bring me to my knees or raise me to the heavens. I love touching someone with my stories or poem. I love when God lets the words flow so fast that I can hardly keep up with it. Digging for just the right word is a special moment too.

This is simple and off the cuff, (well it was when it was scratches in my notebook) but that doesn’t make it less true.
I will wrap this up by saying I would be interested in reading what you love and why.

beach signature of my name
June 27, 2009 at 5:55am
June 27, 2009 at 5:55am
Amid all the Sanford scandal and celebrity deaths, a man of worth and dignity has past throught gates of heaven....
SC Blacksmith Philip Simmons.


Check out Robert Ariail's beautiful tribute to him. Its the June 25th entry.


I alway suspected heaven had SC gates.

June 22, 2009 at 11:31am
June 22, 2009 at 11:31am
I wrote this poem the year my dad past away. Its pure corny sentiment, but sometimes feelings are like that. If you would indulge me.

Someday you will
be bigger.

"Measure me, Daddy!"
as I hold the tape.

Someday you will
go to school.

"Bye Daddy,"
as I drop her off.

Someday you will
like yucky boys.

"Why is Brad a jerk, Pop?"
as I explain.

Someday you will
go to the prom.

"Do you like my dress, Dad!"
as I gaze with wonder.

Someday you will
go to college.

"I will make you proud, Da."
as I wave good bye.

Someday you will
be married.

"Don't cry Daddy."
as I walk her down the aisle.

Someday is today

beach signature of my name
May 31, 2009 at 12:57am
May 31, 2009 at 12:57am
I hate those chain emails. You know the ones. They have long questionnaires about silly stuff.

What’s your favorite color?

What’s your favorite TV character?

What favorite movie character do you most resemble?

And for Christians, “What is God doing for you today?”

The emails promise 99 years of bad luck and the wrath of God if you don’t fill it out and send to 50 friends. I hate them and delete them immediately. So I was a little annoyed to see a questionnaire filled out in Ken’s new blog.(Thoughts of A Wayfarer is listed on my blog roll) However, this particular Q&A is all about writing. I found it an interesting and at times a difficult exercise. Give it a try. I would love to read your answers

What’s the last thing you wrote?

A poem called "Cut the rope

Was it any good? It’s good.

What’s the first thing you ever wrote that you still have?

Yes. A poem called "It is Dark. It describes how my depression felt at age 16 and how it still feels if I’m not careful with my spiritual life.

Write poetry?

Of course. Doesn’t everyone? Whether it’s any good or not remains for the reader to decide.

Favorite genre of writing?

I’m not sure I have a favorite genre. I write mostly micro stories and poetry. I have just started to take my writing seriously in the last year and a half. I’m still finding my feet.

Favorite setting for your characters?

Everyday situations with a twist.

Most fun character you ever wrote?

This is terrible. I don’t really think I’ve written a “fun” character per se. I wrote a 100 word story about a woman who gets revenge in a rather interesting way. Revenge is always fun to imagine. "Megan's Revenge

I also wrote a story about the coming of age of a son of Santa. The character was stock, but it was fun to try to add to the legend. It was part of a blog challenge I participated in in December. I'm not posting the link as it needs a lot of work.

One of the most fun things I wrote for me and I hope the readers was the "The Lani Awards.

Most annoying character you ever wrote?

You mean besides my own annoying autobiographical narration?

Best plot you ever wrote

The 55 word story called "The Betrayal

Coolest plot twist you ever wrote?

A story called "First day of School. I’ve only had one complaint that they saw the twist coming. Of course now I’ll get more.

How often do you get writer’s block?


How do you fix it?

I try to write through it or walk away.

Write fan fiction?

Not really. I’ve written a couple of scenes of Star Trek but they felt phony. I’ll stick with what I know

Do you type or write by hand?

I type poorly and slowly, but it’s easier to read than my handwriting

Do you save everything you write?

Now I do.

Do you ever go back to an old idea long after you abandoned it?

Of course, to paraphrase the cliché, another time’s trash could be some other time’s treasure. New insights or information may make and old idea work.

What’s your favorite thing you’ve written?

How can I choose? Today, this minute:
Favorite poem:"An Apology
Favorite story: "The Conversation. It’s about what a comatose woman overhears.

What’s one genre you’ve never written, and probably never will?

Never say never, but I cannot see me writing a western novel.

How many writing projects are you working on right now?

My blog and my poems. Pretty boring. I can't tell if it's writer's block or lack of inspiration or......

Do you want to write for a living?

Of course. Who wouldn’t want to write for a living? But unless the Good Lord blesses me with some unforeseen opportunities and talent, I’ll just keep plugging along.

I have to say, I’ve never envisioned myself becoming a famous author. I always thought that after I died, someone would find my journals of poetry a la E. Dickinson. I never really expected to share my stuff. I didn’t think anyone would call it poetry or would be interested. This was pre PCs and laptops. (Yes I’m that old.) Writing communities are a wonderful thing.

Have you ever won an award for your writing?
Does third place in a poetry contest in a Nursing tech magazine count? It was published in the magazine

What are your five favorite words?

Slide, free, velvet, okay and (God forgive me) the f bomb. I like words that sound like what they mean.

What character that you’ve written most resembles you?

Almost all of them since most of what I write is autobiographical.

Do you ever write based on your dreams?

Not really. I don’t dream much with insomnia.

Are you concerned with spelling and grammar as you write?

Yes, because if I don’t correct it as I type, I may not see it later.

Does music help you write?

No it’s distracting.

How do people react when they find out you write?

“That’s nice.”

Quote something you’ve written—the first thing that pops into your mind.

“Perfection may not be required, but fewer cringe worthy moments would be nice.”
This is my response to a comment about grammar in the blog not needing to be perfect. I like the quote now that I see it free of context. It could be applied broader.

beach signature of my name
April 27, 2009 at 11:02am
April 27, 2009 at 11:02am
I have a confession. I understand car lust. My first car started it all. The car I paid for myself with my first job. The one that I drove to college. The one that took me to my first real RN job was a Mustang. A 1977 green V8 which meant it could fly. For the first time, I understood my brother's need for speed. The power that car had...eat your heart out Andrettis, Mario, Michael and Marco.

I grew up in the Mid-West and the land is very flat, so we have straight-a-ways. A cop once clocked me at 95mph in 55. Come on, though. It was 4:00 a.m. after a long 16hr shift. I just wanted to get home. And those horses could move.

I didn't even try to get out of the ticket. I was too tired and too angry at getting caught (ah youth).

"Miss, do you know how fast you were going?" said the cop in a professional manner.

"Yes sir. I do." I replied.

"You were going 95. Where's the fire?"

"No fire sir, just got off shift and I want to get home. I have to work later today."

He glared, I swear, glared at me for a long time.

"You work at...R?"

"Yes sir."

"Well slow down or you'll be back sooner than you like."

He sees my uniform and gives me a ticket for going 65 instead of 95. Very nice of him (although at the time I was not happy) because it meant less points and a lesser fine.

Anyway, I have loved Mustangs ever since, but they are not practical especially where I live now. One day though, one day.

My car is probably scrap somewhere. I drove that Mustang until it needed a bullet in it's radiator to put it out of it's misery.

What my car looked like back in the day "1977 Mustang

beach signature of my name

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