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Review of ode to the dragon  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with TGDI Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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Hi Delirium,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, ode to the dragon.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about dragons and love will like this poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It‘s about loving a dragon.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: It made me smile.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION?SPELLING: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.


*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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252
252
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi WinnieKay,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, The Witch of Creek Manor Drive.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about strange neighbors will love this wee tale.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: Jessica found out not all older ladies are witches.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit anxious at first, then it made me smile at the end.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION?SPELLING: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS: The leafless branches of an oak tree hung over the house like skeletal fingers pointing at its roof. -- great description here. I can see the tree reaching for the house.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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253
253
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (3.5)
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Hi Ema Lee,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, I Don't Want to Die!!.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about survival will like this tale.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: She was scared yet tried to stay afloat hoping someone would find her.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: Sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR/PUNCTUATION?SPELLING: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Her long brown hair was a matted mess as she tried with all her might to keep her head above the surface of the water, but She was getting exhausted. -- the “s” on the second she needs to be lower case

Christina’s heavy cloths were becoming too heavy for her to stay above the water as side began to throb and her fragile legs swished through the water. -- cloths should be clothes -- add her before side

“The sun is setting, how much longer will I last?” she said to herself between gasps af breath and pain, -- typo

“I will not be able to last the night, even if I don’t drown, there are other things that lerk beneath me.” -- typo

'What is that? What has come to put an ent to this torture' she thought, crying even more.'I don't want to die'. -- typo

she blacked out. -- capitalize She

*GlassesB*OTHER THINGS OUT OF PLACE:

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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254
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with Mainstream Novel Workshop Group  
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
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Hi Max,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

*Key*Chapter: I just read chapter 3 of your novel, Entangled.

*Key*Title: Chapter 03-Entangled

*Key*Author: Max Griffin

*UmbrellaP*APPEAL: Those who like to read about


*UmbrellaP*WHAT I LIKED:

*Key*Plot:
*Paw*Kevin is in the hospital after taking a fall at the mall, yet things just don’t seem quite right. He needs to find out exactly what happened and what happened to Khalid.

*Key*Style & Voice:
*Paw*All the characters come through strong.

*Key*Referencing:
*Paw*modern-day

*Key*Scene/Setting:
*Paw*You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.


*Key*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*Key*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*Key*Characters:
*Paw*Kevin, Elmira, Monroe, Dr. de la Cruz, Floyd

*Paw*Grammar:
My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

He played nurse's words in his head. -- missing word

The man spoke again, his voice still delcate.-- delcate should be delicate

"'Sides, it's the Christian thing to do to sit with someone what's in need." -- I think what’s should be that’s

*Key*Just My Personal Opinion:I have the sneaky suspicion that everything Kevin is experiencing is part of some sort of an experiment. What happened in the mall didn’t really happen, yet someone is trying to make Kevin think it did. This tale is getting more interesting as it goes along.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Hi Bear,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, Tales of Full Moons' Past.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about moonlight and love will like this poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It’s full of emotion.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A wee bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

full, bigger then life. -- then should be than

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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256
256
Review of Eyes Opened  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi aralls blog's lonely-read?,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, Eyes Opened.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about friendship will love this tiny poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It‘s full of emotion.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: It made me smile.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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257
257
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with TGDI Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Hi Danielle,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, The Icehouse Bonfire.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read mysteries will like this wee tale.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: You have a nice little mystery here.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: Extremely curious.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this talewas about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS: You need to put spaces between your paragraphs. I normally don’t read stories that are all crunched together.

This is a great beginning to a longer tale. Who or what do the voices belong to? What caused the splat? Has she run across the ghosts? Or something more dangerous?

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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258
Review of MISCELLANEA  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with TGDI Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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Hi Dr M C Gupta,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, INVISIBLE INK.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about helpful authors on writing.com will love this wee acrostic.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It‘s a nice tribute to another author.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: It made me smile.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*NAMES: Names in stories make a big difference in creating believable places, people, & things. Are character names different or are they too similar to tell one character from the other?

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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259
259
Review of Legend of Lucrece  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Central Bank  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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Hi Kitte,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, Legend of Lucrece.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about werewolves, vampires, and magic will like this wee tale.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It‘s a different twist on the typical werewolf/vampire tale.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.
The werewolf knight raised his head skyward and let our a ferocious howl that pierced the silent night. -- our should be out

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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260
260
Review of Road to Hat Head  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Central Bank  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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Hi tales-from-the-road,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, Road to Hat Head.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about strange happenings in little towns will find this interesting.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It seems as if Marco and Angelo finally got out of Hat Head.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale/poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand. The extra spacing made it easy on the eyes.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

They parked it into the parking lot and ran back inside. -- take it and take to off into

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS: They found time off university and wanted to make the most of it, so they took a friend’s car, threw boards in the back and took off. -- you might add the words “from the” after off.

RSL -- you might explain to those reader not familiar with New South Wales what RSL is.

Alright, suit yourselves -- I’ve been told by other reviewers on WDC alright is two words: all right

This could become a longer tale with the boys trying to figure out why you can’t leave Hat Head.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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261
261
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Dr M C Gupta,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, THE LIVING DEAD.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about soldiers who have passed on will like the way this poem honors them.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The images your words evoked.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS?COMMENTS: How about highlighting the first letter of each line so it’s easier to see what it says going top to bottom.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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262
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Hi alludra,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, we love the elusive.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about the unknown will like this little poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The images your words evoke.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: It made me smile.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale/poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand. Centering this poem gave it a bit of flare and created an upside down pyramid.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

“I” needs to be capitalized

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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263
Review of Stormy Night  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Sophy,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, Stormy Night.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about rain storms or their fear of them will like this poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The images your words evoke.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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Review of Doll House  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
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Hi Original Nadsie,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, Doll House.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*CHARACTERS: Phoebe -- Dian

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Her legs reached all the way to the ground showing there unique structure when worn with tight skinny jeans. -- there should be their

Her name was Phoebe -- missing period

Best described as the life of a cliché Childs doll house; neat, perfect and simple. -- Childs should Child’s

Dian was merely in her 40's yet was amazingly beautiful, she looked 5 years younger then she really was. -- then should be than

Phoebe and Dian arrived at the table, sat down in wooden chairs and placed there napkins neatly on her laps. -- there should be their, and her should be their

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS?COMMENTS: You need to put spaces between your paragraphs to make it easier to read. I usually don’t read stories that are bunched together yet your title intrigued me.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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Review of The Wolf  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Leger,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, The Wolf.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about wolves will love this poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The images your words evoke.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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266
266
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with Mainstream Novel Workshop Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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Hi April,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

*Key*Chapter: I just read chapter 1 of your novel, Claiming the Oracle.

*Key*Title: Claiming the Oracle ch 1

*Key*Author:

*UmbrellaP*APPEAL: Those who like to read about fairies and oracles will find this an interesting beginning to this novel.

*Key*Plot:
*Paw*The Muridae Fae are waiting for a new oracle and are worried because a new one hasn’t been born. Somehow everyone believes Fay is responsible for that, and she needs to prove she didn’t do anything to cause this to happen.

*Key*Style & Voice:
*Paw*All the characters are coming through clear and strong.

*Key*Referencing:
*Paw*Fantasy

*Key*Scene/Setting:
*Paw*You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*Key*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*Key*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*Key*Characters:
*Paw*The characters are believable.
*Paw*Fay, Jasper, Mrs. Fontina, Roquefort, Imerra, Fennik

*Paw*Grammar:
My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

“It’s funny because you’re fury and passion is so strong that it blows everyone away. -- your is misspelled as you’re

Your life will follow a different path then all the others that came before you. We need you to make the necessary change. -- I believe then should be than

It more resembled a rolling, dome-shaped high hill. Covered by dirt and grasses, it reminded Fay of the hills they would roll down as children. -- need to change hills they would roll down to hills they rolled down

She venerated the Gods, led worship services, listened to the whining public, and settled disputes the list went on and on -- you need a comma after dispute

*UmbrellaP*OTHER MISHAPS: Her mother’s footsteps sounded through the room like a clock ticking time down, spurring Fay on to move faster. -- earlier in this chapter you have Fay’s mom out in the hall and now she’s in a room, when did this happen?

Fay’s mother leaned her head on the door, her tone full of concern for her daughter. -- if this is being told from Fay’s POV she couldn’t see her mother lean her head on the door.

I picked up notes of nutmeg, cloves and vanilla. -- There’s nothing wrong with this sentence. I just don’t know what notes of nutmeg, cloves and vanilla are?

The Fay realized she was in a receiving room of sorts built of white marble which had delicate ribbons of pink quartz running through it. -- the isn’t needed before Fay.

In one part of this chapter you say it’s been six years since Imerra and Fennik performed their ritual on Fay, and in another part say it’s been 60 years since Fay first saw Imerra .


*UmbrellaP*OTHER SUGGESTIONS/COMMENTS: I told him, he’d just experienced a Fay-nado.” -- Fay-nado, great imagery.

*Key*Showing vs. Telling: You did a good job of showing and telling.

*Key*Just My Personal Opinion: This chapter is a wee bit long in my opinion. It’s over 7,000 words long. Maybe it could be broken into two chapters. Just a thought.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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for entry "Chapter 1: The Blight" 
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with FantasyHorrorSciFi Novel Works...  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
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Hi Joto-Kai ,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

*Key*Chapter: I just read chapter 1 of your novel, "Return of The Black Dragon King".

*Key*Title: "Chapter 1: The Blight"

*Key*Author: Joto-Kai

*UmbrellaP*APPEAL: Those who like to read about medieval times and magic will find this an interesting beginning to a novel.

*Key*Plot:
*Paw*There’s a blight that’s destroying the land and the ruler of the land believes his son tried to kill his wife.

*Key*Style & Voice:
*Paw*Seems fine

*Key*Referencing:
*Paw*medieval/Fantasy

*Key*Scene/Setting:
*Paw*You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*Key*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*Key*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*Key*Characters:
*Paw*The characters are believable.
*Paw*Dregor -- Merrick -- Becca -- Kissla -- Carl -- Drensen -- Carolie -- Verdenten
*Paw*Becca and Carl seem to modern of names to be used in a medieval tale.

*Paw*Grammar:
My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Everything seems to be alright.

*UmbrellaP*OTHER MISHAPS: Nobody answered, or perhaps the gathering clouds did. They blocked out the sun, and started to rain. -- insert “it” after and

"Nobody buys the washer woman shtick," he scoffed. -- I believe shtick is a modern day word and wouldn’t be used in medieval times

*Key*Showing vs. Telling: You did a good job of balancing showing with telling.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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268
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Hi Dr M C Gupta,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, BROKEN SAILS: A sonnet.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about lost love will like this poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The images the words evoked.c}

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: a bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE: You used a couple of words that I have no idea as to what they mean, and you didn’t tell the reader what they do mean.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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269
269
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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Hi Angus,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, The Black Cape And Top Hat.

I found it on the Review Me List for WDC Power Reviewers page.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about strange murders will find this an interesting tale to read.


*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: This tale sets up a mystery to be solved.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit unnerved.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*CHARACTER NAMES: Ben, Mindy, Corey

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS?COMMENTS: This is a great beginning for a novel. Have you thought about that? Or even writing a longer version where the reader at least get to find out who or what killed Corey then Ben.

*GlassesB*FLOW: This story is told in a logical order. You didn’t overload this tale with a lot of foreign words and used a variety of sentence lengths.

*GlassesB*WHAT I DIDN’T LIKE: That the tale was so short. It left a lot of unquestions in my mind.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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270
270
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi Christina Daltro♡Brazil,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, The Room in Goose Creek Farmhouse.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about haunted places will like this wee tale.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: It was easy to follow.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit disappointed.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*NAMES: Rami and Adar are the only thing the reader learns about the two characters other than they investigate haunted places. A bit of description of what they look like or how they act would give the reader a better idea who these folks are.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*DESCRIPTIONS/DETAILS: Some detail on how the house looked would have given this a more scary feel.

*GlassesB*LENGTH: I realize that you had a limited word count and it’s hard to write a fully detailed story in so few words.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

“It was about 4 am. -- am. should be a.m.

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*POINT OF VIEW: I know who's point of view I’m in.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS?COMMENTS: This is a great beginning for what could be a good scary story. Add some details about the characters and the house they suspect is haunted. Maybe even like the reader see the ghost that was mentioned.

*GlassesB*FLOW: This story is told in a logical order. You didn’t overload this tale with a lot of foreign words and used a variety of sentence lengths.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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271
271
Review of A Life Unlived  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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Hi Cat,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, A Life Unlived.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about lost love will like this wee poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The rhythm of the rhyme.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: a bit sad.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.


*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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272
272
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with The Central Bank  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Hi devilpup,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, Spector of Beech Hill.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about haunted houses will like this wee tale.


*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: You created a nice story with few words.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A wee be scared.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale/poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*OTHER THINGS OUT OF PLACE:

*GlassesB*DIALOGUE: The dialogue sounds natural. I know who is speaking without the overuse of dialogue.

*GlassesB*OTHER SUGGESTIONS?COMMENTS: You should put spaces between each paragraph to make it easier to read. Also indent each paragraph.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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273
273
Review of The Eyes of Death  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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Hi Prosperous Snow,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee tale, The Eyes of Death.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read mysterious tales will like this wee story.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: You told a complete tale in a few words.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit afraid.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*FLOW: This story is told in a logical order. You didn’t overload this tale with a lot of foreign words and used a variety of sentence lengths.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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274
274
Review of Dark Poet  
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
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Hi HuntersMoon,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your wee poem, Dark Poet.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who like to read about dark thoughts will like this wee poem.

*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The unnerving image at the top of the poem. It grabs the reader‘s attention. I also like that you defined the uncommon words you used for those who didn‘t know what they mean.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: A bit unnerved.

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale/poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand.

*GlassesB*SETTING: You used a nice balance of imagery and well written words that made me feel as if I am there.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*GlassesB*FLOW: This story is told in a logical order. You didn’t overload this tale with a lot of foreign words and used a variety of sentence lengths.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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275
275
Review by Ladybug
In affiliation with TGDI Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi Nikki,

This review is just my humble opinion and is meant to be helpful, not discouraging.

I just read your article, How To Write an Encouraging Review.

*GlassesB*APPEAL: Those who want help writing more detailed reviews will find this article extremely helpful.


*GlassesB*WHAT I LIKED: The links to other websites for addition help.

*GlassesB*HOW THIS TALE OR POEM MADE ME FEEL: Encaouraged

*GlassesB*TITLE: Your title caught my attention and drew me in. It made me curious to discover what this tale/poem was about.

*GlassesB*FORMAT: This is easy to read and understand. The use of color adds a bit of flare to the article.

*GlassesB*GRAMMAR AND PUNCTUATION: My editing skills are not the best in the world, yet I try my best to let the author know if something looks out of place, misspelled or missing.

Seems to be alright.

*ThumbsUp*Great job.

*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams -- Eleanor Roosevelt

Keep unleashing your imagination and let it fly where it wishes! -- Janet Novak*ConfettiV* *ConfettiP* *ConfettiB*

Ladybug

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