I am not one for religion, but your sermon speaks to me. Especially the part about Abba. As a father myself I try to give as much love to my children as possible and is something every parent should be striving for.
This is really nice, and captures that awkward yet sweet first time. It clearly highlights the feelings. Thank goodness there was no sex in this scene, because if there was it would ruing the piece a little. I am not going to go into grammar since I am still grasping the subtler aspects of it. I will say smaller paragraphs would make this a little easier to read.
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