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Printed from http://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/mgmiles01
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500 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
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Review of "A Day"  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Netty, I love the way you personalized one of my favorite passages in the Bible. "A DAY' is very nicely reworded to share with the reader how short a day can be but how long it can also when Biblically thinking about it. I could relate to one day with God, the Lord being like 1,000 years, and yes, the peace that one finds in God really does surpass all understanding. I, too, am grateful and thankful for the creation of life and allowing us to live it one day at a time with the choice to be in God's presence all of the time.

What did I like about "A DAY?" It w had a spiritual base and covered passages in the Bible that I like.
Why did I read it? It was a random piece under the Read & Review section
Suggestions? None
Recommendations? Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
Review of Freedom  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Aletheaxx, "Freedom" did not touch me. (NOTE: I am sure that it was not supposed to touch me, but I also write, and I write most times for my readers but frequently write just for me.) This one-liner was probably written just for you but showed up in writing.com's random selections for rate & Review. Without this one word --senatile -- I would have been able to connect with this thought. I just was not familiar with the word and could not find a definition for it online.

Why did I read this piece? It was a random selection
What did I like about it? It was one line.
Suggestions: See above
Recommendation? Not sure what to recommend -- my thoughts above are just that my thoughts. In my opinion, the writer always knows best what was intended in the writing.

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
3
3
Review of Miss Fit  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Jimminycritic, thank you for writing this short story. I write it and thought that overall you did a good job in telling the story and you stuck to your storyline. My take away from your story was that this young person was troubled by the departure of her mother (you don't say that) but that is a conclusion that could be reached. You also show a loving father with skills, but not the skills needed to reach his daughter in current mental status, even though he was willing to try and made a great sacrifice to do so. Finally, the story suggests that the healing had to come from within and that the daughter made that transition and overcame her problem including her loneliness.

Why I read this story? It was a random selection by writing.com
What did I like? I liked the storyline and the shortness of the story.
Suggested changes: ...they really didn’t know why she threw violent fits(.) (These last three words are not needed-- like she did.) He raised her in the countryside and had to hire help to home school (Homeschool) her. At breakfast, her dad had madeher (make her) a cheese omelet... ... therefore, she never shared (it) with him. something about (the) whole idea of communicating with nature, naturally, just seemed right. ...She wouldn’t need to throw fits any more (anymore) since now she had the means...
Recommendations? Write on. WRITE ON!
4
4
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Tim Chiu, "The One in the Zone" was one of those poems that I might have chosen to not read because of the title and the content. At first, I thought it was going to be about football (not one of my favorite sports), but then as I read on, I was no longer sure of what was being conveyed. So, I went along with the writer to the very end, and asked would I read this poem again? I decided no even though I pretty much liked the flow and the rhyming at the end of each line.

Why did I read this poem? It was a random selection
Why did I like? The rhyming and the length of the poem.
What would I change? Nothing about the poem, but the description line so that it helps the reader to better understand what is being conveyed in the poem. That would have helped me.
Suggestions? See above.
RecommendationS? Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
Review of I Am  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
BSbyBS, some days we just have to put it out there "I AM!" Nothing more and nothing less. I exist. I live and breathe and feel and laugh and cry and need and love and all of those things and sometimes all at the same time. Thank you for sharing this piece. You are not alone in your feelings nor in your thinking about who you are and what you want others to know about you -- especially when it seems that you are invisible or unwanted.

Why did I read this? It was a random selection, and it was short
What did I like? It was short, to the point, easy to relate to, and self-explanatory.
Suggestions: None

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
6
6
Review of The Honeymoon  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
WOW, Very Thankful, a bold story about two very bold, inconsiderate, and deceitful people -- husband and maid of "honor" -- what honor. Equally bold and deceitful was the husband that felt the need to cheat on his honeymoon. WOW! Finally, ownership and domestic violence is never the answer to a broken heart even when it feels justified. Why not just cut your losses and be thankful for learning early in the game before becoming vested? Interesting.

Why did I read it? Assigned by writing.com in the read and review column.
What did I like? The telling of the story, but shocked by the ending.
Suggestions: NOne

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
7
7
Review of Nature's Lulluby  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Silver, you are one step ahead of me in writing short stories. Thanks for sharing. I enjoyed this short story because it was about my most favorite piece of nature-- trees. I am amazed how much trees talk. Different trees make different sounds, and bare trees are so quiet you can hear yourself breath. I often sit under trees or sit somewhere watching the leaves blow and listening to their chatter. Glad to meet someone else that can get lost in the sounds and soft whispers of the trees.

Why did I read this piece? It was a random selection by writing.com
What did I like? The subject matter -- trees
Suggestions: None

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
Review of Scouts  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Jacky, I loved this piece "Scouts!" It was hilarious. I have met quite a few scout over the years, and I agree with you 100% there should be some other way for a few of them to get their outdoors badge. My grandson is a scout and working toward his Eagle badge. He loves the outdoors and would live out there. Some of my other grandsons REFUSE to join the Scouts because they might have to stay outdoors in a tent.

Why I read your piece? It was assigned by writing.com in the random selection section.

What would I change? NOTHING.

Suggestion: Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Review of McDonald's Lunch  
Review by G. B. Williams
Rated: E | (5.0)
Lou-Thankful for new words, your "McDonald Lunch" you took me down a very nostalgic past. My memory was my father taking me to my first Burger King and eating my first Whopper in Pompano Beach, Florida. Wow, those were the times, and yes a much simpler life. Thank you for sharing this piece.

Why did I read it? It was a random selection from writing.com
What did I like? I like the way you told the story and weaved in so many pieces of my simple past without ever missing a beat about how important that lunch was at the new McDonald's.
What would I change? Absolutely nothing.
Recommendation: Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
10
10
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with RAOK Upgrade Brigade Group  
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
DeSoto, thank you for sharing your story, "Tigerstars Revenge!" It shows your ability to focus on your subject matter and to tell a story.

Why I decided to read Tigerstars Revenge -- it was a random selection by writing.com.
What did I like about the story -- it was rather short, but delivered a punch.
What I would change -- the following:

1. I would review and edit the story --

Change their to there -- Scourge just stands their (there) unable to escape Tigerstar...

Change their to there -- Tigerstar gets up and looks at Scourge who stands their (there) covered...

Check capitalization and spelling for consistency -- Scourge got to his paws ''now!'' tigerstar (Tigerstars) hissed and...

Check capitalization and spelling for consistency -- ... he couldn't so he walked over to tigerstar (Tigerstars)

My final suggestion would be that you review and edit the entire piece.

Thank you for allowing me to read and review your story. I hope that you can use some of what I have offered.

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
11
11
Review of Things I Remember  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Matt Earl, "Things I Remember" touched me in just the right place for they are also things that I am sure many others remember from their childhood. What a nice way to capture an entire era of one's life. I get the sense that your childhood was a little bit rough and even hinted of domestic violence and maybe even a little child abuse. As a person very concerned and previously involved in domestic violence care provider, I saw many children who will remember just those things from their childhood when they are grown and looking back. Thank you for sharing, and I pray that if this poem is about your childhood, that you will seek counseling and closure on that era in your life.

Why I read your poem? It was a random selection by writing.com
What did I like about your poem? I told a very tough story in a very few words
What would I change? Nothing
Recommendation: Write on! WRITE ON.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
12
12
Review of The Gory Pumpkin  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Tim Chiu, thanks for writing and sharing your poem about Halloween. I often consider getting pumpkins to dress up my yard, and for many reasons decide not to make that leap of faith. Your poem helped me to confirm that spending time to carve a pumpkin that might just take me a lot of time and end up on my lawn, porch or even my car, might not be the best use of my time. I do admire my neighbors' relatives and friends who give out candy to the children in the neighborhood. I, personally enjoy the children ringing my doorbell. Some are so timid, and cute, while others way pass their youth, but still enjoying their days gone by collecting free candy in pillowcases and the like.

Why did I read your poem? It was a random selection by writing.com.
What did I like? The subject matter addressed in the poem.
What would I change? Nothing
Recommendation: Write on! WRITE ON.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
13
13
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Kate, thank you for sharing. I read the prologue to your new book and immediately wondered what age group is the book going to reach. I did not learn much about the book from the prologue other than I should read on to find out why the parents did not allow Grace to go to the beach.

Why did I read this piece? It was randomly assigned by writing.com.
What did I like? It was very short
What didn't I like? It did not give enough information as a prologue
Suggestions: Write on. WRITE ON!



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
14
14
Review of Trembling limbs  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Spidey, good morning. Thanks for sharing "Trembling Limbs." I am not afraid of spiders, but I know lots of people who are an act in the manner described in your poem. I think the poem captures the other side of the coin from the spider's viewpoint. As humans, we act on our fears on every level, and I know that spiders and many other creatures do not. Most try to avoid us and usually if allowed, will scurry away.

Why I read your poem? It was a random selection by writing.com.
What did I like? I liked the way the poem was written and the story that it told.
What would I change? Nothing
Suggestions: Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
15
15
Review of A new love  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with Welcome To My Reality Bank & M...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
G.Bayley, thank you for writing and sharing. Good storyline and your message is clear Your title reflects the story "A New Love," and explains in detail what, why, and how, but it was a little bit of a challenge for me to read and stay focused on the story. I am not a grammarian or real writer but felt some kind of way about the written words. Please remember as you read my comments that these are my opinions and I in no way mean them as a negative. Use what you can and disregard everything else.

Why I did I read this piece? Random selection from writing.com
What did I like? It was a love story
What would I change? the writing style and presentation
Suggestion? Rewrite, edit tightly, and maybe consider an app that checks the grammar and punctuation
Recommendation? Write on! WRITE ON!




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
16
16
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Terggen, thanks for sharing your poem about Pi. I admit I liked the rhythm and rhyme of pi, but know absolutely nothing about it and how to use it. It was fun being forced to go look it up again after being out of high school for so many years. I liked the beat of the poem and the reference to Spock and Star Trek since I am a Star Trek Fan. I would never have thought of writing a poem about PI!

Why I read it? Random selection by writing.com.
What did I like? The fact that it forced me to go back and remember what pi stood for and its origin.
What would I change? Nothing.
Suggestions? None
Recommendation: Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
17
17
Review of Nightmare  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
SkyFall, thank you for sharing this piece "Nightmare" with me on writing.com. I have never had a true nightmare, but I have felt like I have had a dream that kept repeating itself for years. The same dream over and over for years, and never understanding it but often wondering why it kept repeating itself. Eventually, I stopped dreaming it, but it nagged in my brain and still does to this day. I say all of this because I can't imagine having a real nightmarish dream such as the one you described. Freighting!

Why I read it? Randomly chosen.
What did I like? The suspense.
Suggestions? Re-read and edit

Thank you for sharing.

Write on! WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
18
18
Review of MY HATS  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Dr. M. C. Gupta, thank you for sharing your personal life in your poem "MY HATS." It is a clever way to share your life story, and at the same time write about your feelings as you entered each phase of your life. I enjoyed the read, and got a clear picture of your self-development, constant desire to improved and enhance yourself, but also your patriotism and the education of others. You have accomplished a lot in life and your personal growth is evident in this poem. Thanks for sharing it.

Why I read it? Your name caught my attention because there is/was a Dr. Gupta practicing medicine in my hometown, and I was amazed to think that he was a writer, but a writer on writing.com. Then I read "My HATS" and realized that it was not the same Dr. Gupta.

What did I like? The way you told your life story in a poem that had less than twelve (12) verses. You have really filled in that blank (-) between your birth and now, and still have so much more than you can do. Your many hats are awesome.

Recommendations/suggestions? I have none to offer.

I am impressed with your many accomplishments.

Write on! WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
19
19
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Tanya555, thank you for sharing "The Wall She Built." I did not quite get to or understand "The Wall She Built," but thought it was a well-written piece that was leading up to a storyline. It was clear that the person being described in the piece in a place that has gone dark and scary in addition to being cold, but only at the end did I realize the reason for the storyline, i.e., the adoptee died and now the person is more alone than before the adoption and left only with someone that she has only known for six month.

Why I read it? It was randomly assigned by Writing.com
What did I like? The piece was rather well written
Suggestions: Help the reader understand or grasp the relationship between the written word and the title
Recommendation: Write on! WRITE ON.

NOTE: PLEASE PLEASE keep in mind, these are my comments. I have no idea what you were attempting to convey. Please discard anything that is not appropriate for you, but no matter what, please keep on writing. I am a neophyte at writing even though I have been writing all of my life. LOL


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
20
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Review of Bewildered  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
CC, thank you for writing and sharing your piece. I read it with some interest and more and more interest as I kept wanting to know what was the "word" that pitched you into such a bewildering state of mind. Needless to say, I read the piece twice still looking for the word that set everything off and did not get it until I thought about it -- Bewildered! Thus, the name of the piece. Very well written and quite powerful.

Why I read it? It was a random selection by Writing.com.
What did I like? The suspense of the piece
Recommendation: Place the word Bewildered at the very beginning of the piece
Suggestions: The word comes out of no where (nowhere); ..as I attempt to breath (breathe).

Write on! WRITE ON!


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21
21
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Prosperous Snow (Neva), I know nothing about this poem style and appreciated the explanation provided at the end. I agree with the message that we spend a lot of time waiting, and that time is waste for it shall never come again. I sometimes wonder how much time we lose waiting. Yesterday, I attended an "important" meeting that was to start at 1:00 p.m. sharp. The caller of the important meeting arrived at 1:45 p.m. Yes, he called several times to say that he was trying to get there and had very good reasons for the delay. However, my improper planning left me sitting an hour away from my office with nothing to work on since my computer decided to DIE while I was waiting. YES, I kept watching the clock for the hands to move and sighed in relief when he finally showed up.

Why I read this piece? It was randomly assigned

What I liked? The brevity and concise way you described how we waste but watch ourselves waste time.

Recommendation: Write on! WRITE ON!

Thanks for sharing.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
22
22
Review of Jesus is Lord!  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
ruwth, it is quite nice to stumble across a true believer that writes from the heart, experience, and life. I, too, know Jesus Christ as my Savior and reading your transition from just saying the words to living the words was just awesome. I have been and continue to be a work in progress all of my life. I have frequently (I should say daily) stated/repeated: "Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son." I have also come to learn that when I was a child, I understood as a child, but now that I have grown older, I have put away my childish thinking, and understand better the words of our Savior. By reading "Jesus is Lord," I would say that you too have developed a much closer relationship with God as you continue your journey. THANK YOU so much for sharing.

Why I read this piece? Drawn to it by the title; wanted to see what the writer had to say about Jesus being Lord; happy to see a spiritual piece that I could relate to.

What I liked. I liked the writer's ability to critique the growth process in the walk with Jesus over the years.

Recommendation(s) for change:...Father would be glorified throught (through) the Son; page for me as i (I) was reading the Bible

Comment overall: Write on! WRITE ON!


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23
23
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Brenpoet, thank you for sharing this very nicely written piece. I was moved by the view expressed throughout the poem. I believe that we who believe understand the symbolism of "The White Vestment." Unless we are clean by the blood of Christ, we will not appear unblemished or worthy in God's sight when he returns. As Born agaiin Christians, we must work and believe in the second coming, and that our reward will be a seat with God and the angels.

Why I read it: It was a random selection by Writing.com
What I liked: The religious tone
Recommendations: None

Write on! WRITE ON.


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24
24
Review of Flagpole  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Bruce Kenn, thanks for sharing this very short piece about the flagpole. I could just imagine seeing the flagpole leaning one day and come back by on another day and seeing the chair sitting at the base of the flagpole trying to hold it up straight. The piece did touch my funny bone, but then went a little deeper to ask if maybe someone would either remove the chair and do it correctly or maybe even tell someone how awkward the chair looked and remove it.

Why I read it: It was a randomly selected piece on Writing.com
What I liked: The lightheartedness of it.
What I would change: Absolutely nothing. It stands on its own. LOL
Recommendations: None

Write on! WRITE ON.


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25
25
Review of Dipping the Stars  
Review by G. B. Williams
In affiliation with The Newbies Academy Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Fyndorian, thank you for sharing this piece. I like the message that is being conved, i.e., that you must look deeper than what is on the surface to truly appreciate the beauty, the value, and the intent. Most often people only see what they want to see without ever digging or looking deeper. The world is NOT always what it seems, and neither or people.

Why I read it: It was a random selection
What I liked: The message that was conveyed in the stanzas
What I would change some of the rhythm in the stanzas
Recommendation: Consider a review and rewrite of some of the stanzas.

Write on. WRITE ON!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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