Hi Joseph,
I love your line on never saying goodbye. Even in my culture(Hindu) it is discouraged to bid goodbye. Instead like you have shown say something like "see you soon."
The thought of not saying goodbye, which sounds like final farewell, appeals to me.
I say see you later
Meet you on the other side
Strengths
Informal and conversational style.
It sounds spontaneous and natural.
The person who doesn't like to say goodbye must be in all possibility kind and friendly.
There we shall gather yet again
What I liked most
The poetic quality of the poem, with lines that take me to some nice eternally beautiful place.
On that beautiful Riverside
Where sorrows are no more
This review on Jane Austen's famous novels mirrors the important events in each of them.
It is difficult to do justice to Austen's grasp of life and her ability to bring it to the novels.
Her novels show how dependent women were on marriage and so pursue husbands with financial security. Love fades to the background. Yet, Jane Austen's novels owe their appeal due to her skillful handling of the importance of the sentiment of love combined with realities of money and "connections."
So I learn through her novels that certain values are permanent despite the gap between the rich and the not so rich.
Whatever changes today brings, be it bad or good, I would wake up new and whole when tomorrow comes.
So the poet could listen to the dream music despite being surrounded by painful realities. To me, it is therapeutic philosophy, which has appeal and far reaching effect on a thinking person.
" and Tomorrow
The world will swirl
dancing to my dream music"
To me, this "dream music" the poet speaks of represents the inner world sequestered from the physical world tucked in the labyrinths of the soul.
"my passing" or death has this cleansing effect because it frees the soul from the prison of contraries such as the "fleeting and permanent"
Absolutely appealing thoughts.
"fate" in the last line affects the picture we get earlier in the poem. The hand of fate is viewed with importance because life changes for good or bad if fate has a part to play.
A very contemplative poem dwelling on realities with philosophical musings.
Free style poem flows well.
Looks like Paradise takes a long time to plan and build. The previous incident concerning finding paradise in minutes was a great disaster and those, who craved and drank the mysterious liquid got liquidated if that is what paradise meant.
It would be preposterous to assume that one can ascend to paradise instantly. It is everybody's knowledge that one has to sincerely attempt to achieve things, which is possible only after long.
The color blue is significantly used to show the difference between the two kinds of people.
It reminds me of the adage, "if wishes are horses beggars would ride."
The two characters seem to have understood the basics of building good life or finding paradise.
"That’s been ten years now. We’re still building our paradise."
A different kind of tale where the end, which is realistic merges with the preceding events, which are ephemeral.
You brought spring skies to mind's eye with this little poem. As I write this review, I see the dark clouds gathering in the distance and moving slowly closer. I feel the touch of rain drops, which will gather force in minutes.
"The first few drops
trigger the mass,"
This visual poem shows the methodically moving mass of grey clouds nearer home to burst forth a little later into a flood of rain.
A natural phenomenon finds simple and true to reality expression.
"Drifting almost
aimlessly.."
It flows well.
There is slow rhythm to this rhyme, quite apt and appropriate.
Thank you for a spontaneous write.
The anticlimax at the end is the comical observation on vending machine failure as against the changes in life in the preceding lines.
Looks like the whole life is a chain of changes without which life never happens. No wonder they say that change is the law of life.
Yes, changes sometimes are heart breaking such as leaving friends to shift to another town or when a girl breaks his heart.
"Moving away from my friends to a new town
Can’t stand change"
Changeless life could be stagnant without growth or without a chance to evolve into a better person.
Like it or hate it, change happens without effort most of the time.
I like the practical and personal observations of life contained in this flowing humorous verse.
It flows well with visual imagery.
This passage on laughter is an impressive comment on the sense of humour.
Humour is essential to life.
Laughter relieves a person of tensions and seriousness. It is like a fresh breeze on a hot day. It helps spreading positive vibes.
Your views on laughter are relevant at all times .
I like the age old saying that laughter is the best medicine.
Looking at the winter evening of adventure from the child's point of view is presented in this calming tale.
Well narrated while showing what pleases a kid that follows her parents on a chilly evening to the store.
She knows what should be given top priority on that winter evening with the approach of an "icy storm."
The snow covered grounds do not pose a problem as she would have yummy things after going home.
"The promise of good food and an even better dessert..."
But that's not all.
Her immediate anticipation is a class apart.
"Tea parties with dolls could wait; even hot chocolate could wait. The ice dragons were coming."
I would like to read such a cool story on a winter evening over some hot chocolate.
The love she found did not last long. Even then, it is difficult to let it go. Could it be a case of right people meeting at wrong place and time?
Despite the temporariness of the emotions, it is still worthy enough for the lover. Refuses comment preferring things to hang on the "ladder".
Perhaps a valuable memory.
"leave it where it was
back there, on the ladder..."
Between heaven and earth, between reality and dream.
Imagery shows the situation quite visually.
It flows well.
Have a wonderful WDC Account Anniversary!
Congratulations!
Message of doing our best while chasing rainbow is well conveyed in this short but appealing verse.
My review here is for your WDC Account Anniversary.
Congratulations for being a creative member of WDC and continuing.
Have a wonderful day!
This poem also exhorts to be positive under all circumstances be it sad or happy.
This philosophy should work very well especially with those who sink in depression when things don't look bright or hopeful.
"Your love may wane.
Chase the rainbow little one."
Doing and hoping for the best is a way to ward off negative thoughts and letting unhappy events gain on us.
A helpful poem for all.
Imagery is visual and it flows well.
Sally stands out because her freedom lies in his death, the abuser for as long as they were married.
The story implies the need to react to abuse by the person they marry.
Before walking into a wedlock it is their or their family's duty to check on the background details of the partner, be it a man or a woman.
Details of abuse would move any sensitive person to feel deeply.
Other than expecting and feeling relieved at the death of the sadistic man, she could have tried to find freedom by means of social justice agency.
Economic freedom of the woman goes a long way in countering such condemnable ways.
Great fun watching kids playing, yelling and getting irritated with one another.
Both kids stand up to their rights not giving an inch to the other.
It is wise to leave them to their way of being engaged as long as they don't come to physical fights.
Narration with appropriate dialog is a winner.
I agree with the fact that, "You can’t pay for entertainment this good."
This entertainment is possible only for a patient and amicable granddad.
So where lies freedom?
Certainly not in cages made of gold or chains of silk.
Like the majority the poor girl thought wealth and fame are the key to happiness only to be disappointed.
As the princess proved, priceless freedom is in the open skies, in the mind that experiences it day and night, the possibility to be on one's own, not dependent on others for material or spiritual needs.
Freedom is that heaven into which every living soul should wake up.
This poem is impressive because it contains the meaning and purpose of true and uncorrupt freedom.
It flows well with perfect rhythm and vivid imagery.
Indeed, I have seen such people, who despite knowing truth spread lies and engage in negative propaganda.
The latest trend is to troll the innocent people mercilessly. This is the worst thing that electronic media could do.
"Choose to continue its dark journey"
Usually, it is jealousy and coveting that cause them indulge in such acts of unkindness. They are just compulsive critics of no good.
They are found in every society and in every walk of life.
Those who know the truth should condemn them and oust them from society.
This poem sums up the spread of malevolent criticism.
The beginning of the poem with a figure of speech is impressive.
"Those black clouds filled with lies and hatred
They float around, and block the truth"
I find the poem quite vocal on rumors, mostly baseless.
It flows well with vivid imagery.
To me it sounds like a tale of transformation spiritually as well.
True the little girl attained fairyhood after her initiation into their magic world. This entrance into the world of beauty is possible because of her pure mind. She was undoubtedly the right choice for a rare honor.
The fairy tale is told in an interesting manner. The tone of the narrator is apt and can easily find audience both young and mature.
Language is clear and well controlled.
Characters are drawn with care and the dialog is just what we agree with.
This poem is also about patience besides courage.
I call them supreme souls who never mind laboring day and night for others and not for self.
I know a few of this kind.
It is their love of service with a motto work is worship.
"Courage is doing the endless drudgery
That no one sees—"
Even their thinking is selfless as the poet says.
"Buying them new shoes
Instead of your video games"
Most impressive lines-
"Giving when you'd rather keep'
This generally happens. It takes an effort to give rather than keep although it is useless for the person. That's the way selfishness works.
We don't want it, yet we keep it. Purely possessive.
The mother you depicted here is no less than a super woman.
Mother's virtues are presented in rhyming couplets in an appealing way.
"Fearless is a Mother's spirit.
She protects her home, and family in it."
This is so true. My heart melts when I think of the sacrifices a mother makes for her family.
She is truly an angel in the house without whose presence everything falls apart.
This reminds me of the need to protect a mother in her old age. It is every son and every daughter's duty. Mother's due must be paid by returning all her love in the same manner.
“This infinite space” termed mind, is one truly amazing part of the human physiology.
Mind makes what we are. It is the mind that causes us to rise or fall . It makes hell out of heaven and a heaven out of hell.
The descriptive phrases created by the poet stand out.
“…this hidden sanctuary”
“This invention once conception”
Mind is the core mechanism that keeps us creating, criticising, thinking or solving.
It sets us apart from the rest of God’s creation. The mysterious homosapiens!
The voices inside are not those of others' but your very own. What is commendable is you are able to detach yourself and listen to them like a third person. This gives you enough space to decide on which side you are.
"One Looks for happiness,one dwells in pain
One seeks love,the other-fame
A debate goes on in my mind"
This is not uncommon. It happens to all.
The brain and heart with their ceaseless activity churn several thoughts, sometimes harmonious and sometimes conflicting.
This debate between should I or should I not is an ancient problem, a dilemma well voiced in Hamlet, "To be or not to be."
Finally, it is the individual's choice to select the answer or solution to the battle going on inside of him or herself.
If you are not on the winning side, there must be a logical reason, which involves your conscience.
It is a good poem showing an analytical mind. It flows well.
This poem shows broken dreams and shattered feelings due to love failure.
The aftermath of a hurt heart is depicted in various scenes. It is difficult to erase past nor is it easy to escape from its looming shadow.
"I scrubbed at my skin a total of 18 times and then again 20 times with a different bar of soap."
The intensity of hatred for what happened is shocking.
Yet, she is afraid of his appearance and keeps herself locked behind doors.
"I slept with the lights on for 7 weeks and never opened the window even in the 98 degree heat."
This prose poem is a warning to those who blindly fall in love without knowing the person well.
True love takes time to grow.
Way to go!
I felt the same when I started learning Spanish.
Besides vocabulary, I find their grammar and sentence structure quite interesting and challenging.
I notice that I begin to spend a lot of time over learning this language.
In this note you have successfully shown the ways to learn a language in an easy way.
Living in the environment exchanging conversation is the key to speak a new language I guess.
The fact that you don't have your own space under your own roof is somewhat bewildering. It could be the supervisor speaking or the owner of the house. I wonder.
You have shown the crowded room, the liberties the visitors take with your food and shelter very clearly indeed.
"Stealing and munching on all my food,
acting stupid, immature and crude."
Perhaps taking suitable measures to stop grate crashing is in order. it is high time you did that.
This mess happens because people overstay their welcome lacking manners and decency or stupid or fool hardy enough not to realize their own ignorance.
Missing the lover is well depicted in this free style poem.
Losing love can mean losing every connection with life and the world.
Senses are of no avail and the world means nothing when she departed.
"that night...that night...
i died a painful death"
That night made his soul dark and life shattered. The extent of misery and pain cross the limits and the soul is tortured beyond measure and now nothing remains.
Understandable pain is convincingly shown by using senses.
It flows well.
This is not a poem written for starry eyed lovers who dwell in seventh heaven and crash down when love alters.
This poem is for lovers who love for keeps and stay in love come what may. It is an ideal world of love and not so removed from reality. Ups and downs are well versified and the fact of sticking together remains.
"Two that don’t quite see the world through the same exact lens,"
As thinking feeling human beings the lovers in the poem realize that life is not is not always spring. Seasons change yet true love stays unchanged despite differences.
Imagery is quite visual and souls are transparently presented.
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