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2024. Going anywhere inside my little world. |
| Come on the adventures of a little mouse as she writes about her opinions and her life. |
| Reading my favorite authors makes me feel different ways depending on what genre and subject matter I am reading. While reading how-to books on writing, for example, I feel like a student in a classroom or lecture hall. When I read my Laurell K Hamilton Anita Blake novels I feel like I'm a friend tagging along on her adventure.. When I read Danielle Steele I feel as a fly on the wall wondering who is going to fall for who when. Finally with my Stephen King or Dean Koontz novels I am on the edge of my seat wondering who is going to survive. I love reading a variety of things as much as I enjoy writing them. I've been wondering all day if I am going through my RoE novel all wrong. Most stories like it tell the story through the antagonist (the killer) and the protagonist (usually the PD). RoE tells the story through the protagonist (who is the falsely accused) and the PD. The POV characters are the falsely accused girlfriend and the head of the PD. It just keeps feeling like it is going in circles or something to that effect and I've hit a dead end. ..... I really need to start over from the beginning again and do a rewrite putting in some more details I've come up with that will help move the story forward. I also need to add in some more details that foreshadow what is happening in Book 2: THTW. I always have too many irons in the fire and I am so overwhelmed I can't get myself to work on any of them. To make matters worse I am constantly thinking of more things I should be doing. Right now I'm going to take a break from writing and do some reading tonight. I'll get back to writing tomorrow after I see the doctor coming to evaluate me for my insurance in the morning. |
| I have never felt as valued as I do here at WdC. I am told constantly by someone or other member on here that they are grateful I am just me. I try to help and be here for everyone though sometimes that is a daunting task. You all do one thing for me though. You get me away from my reality.... If anyone remembers, I came to one of the WdC conventions. I felt the way someone said. "You look like you're ready to run out of here like a scared mouse." M nickname back then was mouse too, and I think I was going by the name Kristy Mouse..... I met one of the loves of my life through here and ended up living with him for three wonderful years in Missouri. I regret that I left him but I couldn't deal with his family. I was a different person in those times. I was a child still though I was in my late 20s early 30s. I think even older. All I know is I was an immature self centered little brat until about a year after I came to Port Huron and I was introduced to DBT.... Now? Now I am more of a person of my word and care a great deal about my fellow human beings. I know who I am and what I want out of life (though some of it I probably will never have). WdC has been here for me as well and helps me to keep the one thing I know for sure at the forefront: I am a Writer. I can not go a day without writing something. My writing is my life. Been wondering if, just for shitz and giggles, I should post my erotica stories to my portfolio. To me they are quite good, even now about four years later. I just wonder though. Their inspiration is from some resources that might put them under the category of fanfiction. I'm afraid someone will recognize my characters; then again, maybe they won't. I'll have to reread them before I post them. |
I have two Dragons so far in "WDC Dragon Vale"  by GERVIC 🐉 WDC Dragon Vale  . It's fun but I doubt if mine are going to grow very fast. I am doing "Habit Heroes " by 🌸 pwheeler - love joy peace  again this month. For it I said I would do two reviews this month which I did on the first.I also said I would enter two contests this month. I just wish you got experience in Dragon Vale for just entering. I never win. I pulled out my offline notes to "Rage of Envy Rewrite Project" by Khola Mousethyme  . That's about as far as it got. (insert whining here)I printed off a bunch of promising looking prompts and some writing instructions from my emails. I really hope that if I don't get any more inspirations for RoE, that I will be able to write something from one of these. I've been aching so bad and I'm tired all the time so I am not really getting anything done. I've even slacked off on working on my diamond painting. Terry calls it working on my beads but that isn't really what it is. I almost did a "I want to write but I don't know what to write" montage again just to be able to say I wrote something. I need to pull out my notebooks and start keeping those up again. It may be jut scratching notes but it is writing. I should put meditation on Habit Heroes next month. I've gotten away from that lately. Well I get plenty to do so I'lll catch up again tomorrow. |
| cleaned my room a bit today. couldn't take it any more. I put my clothes away as best as I could I'm falling asleep and really don't know what to say. Started a new diamond painting on Wednesday. It is going a lot better. That last one was a major pain in the butt. Terry still wants to give it to Ed's daughter. I have to quit. I can't keep my eyes open. |
| The time has come to talk of times, of resolutions and goals and frivilous things that do not rhyme........ Don't ask me where I am or where that came from because I haven't the foggiest notion....... Terry allowed Bill to let me have some of his homemade THC tea. Its supposed have helped me with my pain (man does it ever) and stop the jerky-shakiness of my Parkinson's disease. The only thing my doctor has me on is requip for my RLS. I'm trying to decipher whether what I am feeling is just lack of rest (I usually take a 2-4 hr nap in the afternoons. I couldn't today because our little Cindy -lou-who decided to come spend the day.) the tea, or my mind flipping out like it thinks it should be doing on the tea. believe that over thinking like this is what goes into the paranoia when smoking ...... It just occurred to me, saying that ____________ is now legal, at least in some places, does that change its rating? I mean it used to fall under "illegal drug use" .... Now in some places it is actually referred to as "taking prescribed medication"..... I don't know. I questioning whether or not I should even save this entry. It is a highly controversial subject in some circles. I don't even remember what rating I gave this blog or if it should be heightened. With the people in my house now this is going to be an ongoing thread in here. Okay I feel like I'm coming down off the initial buzz. Time to mellow out and watch some TV. Merry Meet and Blessed Be then Merry Meet again!  |
| One of Terry's sister's friends dropped by three big bags of clothes today. I was just telling myself I needed more tops and that's what most of this was...... but there was another blessing in it. Three dresses in the style of Witchy clothes! I love them! There also was two shirts with sayings on them "baddest witch in town" and "there's nothing scarier than me"..... Whoever these came from must have been a witch..... Thank the Higher Powers for letting these wonderful clothes find their way to me..... Been scratching down attempts at a new chapter for my novel and I keep tearing them up. More and more I think I need to restart from the beginning but then I don't know if I want to start a new book or edit the entries in the current book or just keep adding new entries to this book item. If you think that sounds confusing it is only half of the dizziness it causes me. I have all this free time and I have plenty of opportunities to write. Do I take advantage of that? OF course not. I'm tired of beating myself up about it. |
| my mind is in a fog and everything I try to look at this morning doesn't make any sense. I can't tell what I am supposed to do, especially for Dragon Vale. My poor dragons are going to remain eggs forever...... I don't feel right today. Every time I move my head the room decides to take a spin. My brain is numb. My sinuses are active. I feel like crawling back into bed and covering my head. It doessn't help that I hate the diamond painting Ilm working on. It's supposed to have all these details in it that are just not coming through. I can't tell where I am going wrong .I swear it is the graph that is screwy. Oh well. Sooner or later I'll be done with it and I don't even care how it comes out anymore. I'll write more later.... It's later... I'm getting depressed about my writing. I told myself (and others) in Habit Heroes that I was going to add a chapter to one of my novels this month. I was just looking at RoE and THTW and they both look like confused crap to me. I want to trash them and start fresh. I guess I'll look at my other projects under construction and see if I can write something on one of them. What's in a name? Let me tell you a quick story. When I turned ten I told myself I was going to be a best selling author when I grew up. I was going to use my initials as my pen name. KAB I started writing little stories about my stuffed animals and their adventures. They were mostly gibberous about them hiding how they could move and talk when they wanted. At twelve, I chose a better pen name. Kristy Parkers. I don't know where it came from. It just popped in my head as a decent pen name. Now here's the thing. When I was sixteen my Mother told me that my name was supposed to have been Kristen but my Dad didn't like it. He said it sounded too much like a boy's name. It was a surreal moment for me. Khola Mousethyme is my Witch name. I don't know where Khola came from either. Mouse is my spirit animal and Thyme is an interesting herb. It is used for cleansing, protection and healing. Khola just always reminded me of a koala bear. Anyways there are my names. |
| Been living on Vistaril for the past two days. Tension can't be cut with a chainsaw around here lately. Terry has been up in arms over S. She's out on a run and making excuses why she can't go back to rehab. Terry had a dream of S dying and is beside herself. Terry being upset about S does nothing to improve her tentious relationship with David. They both seem on edge and getting upset over the tiniest of things. David hasn't been on one of his 2-3 day getaways lately and he needs to. Last night someone walked up into the house but ran back out when they encountered Prince barking in the living room. No one we know would run out because of Prince but we could be wrong. What's happening new next month? Money is going to become tighter than it has been. We are going to be ordering water delivery from the Culligan man and have to pay cash for it. Tr is ordering us gel foams for our chairs so we will have to pay for that. Already put out $80 for new door locks. I guess things are tight all over but not everyone has three other people breathing down their neck telling them what to spend every cent on. Terry's cousin is staying with us now. He's pleasant enough and a good cook (so far). He says he is going to help out around here and get some things done like the bathroom and finish painting. Says the only thing he doesn't do is electrical. Whenever I can afford my ceiling fan (probably when I get my taxes if Terry and others don't already have plans for it) I'll have to hire someone else to install it. Maybe though I can get some other things done like my shrine curtains hung and my wall hangings put up. Looking forward to talking to Sally and Jacob on Monday. I want to start doing things again. I know DBT Graduate Class is starting up soon and everyone agreed at their case planning meeting that I would be a good fit for it. I still hate losing Cathy as my therapist but things are set up the way they are. Hopefully getting back into the swing of things soon........ |
| my keyboard doesn't want to work.. I think it might be dead.. My room has been in shambles since before the weekend. I am just not in the mood to clean it. Why? Nothing on my list is ever going to get done. Okay, part of that is because I'm afraid to talk to David about it. Still, I should be able to do in my room what I want. I am just so tired all the time and I am in pain. I have more than convinced myself that I have Parkinson's disease even though there is not an official diagnosis. People were saying I had Tardive dyskinesia and restless leg syndrome but those are not accompanied by the pain I am in. I wish someone would believe me and help me. The past two days I have had nausea and diarrhea. Not fun. More than once I've been glad I wear pull ups . I haven't been able to write much. I am having to force myself into writing this blog entry tonight. There is nothing to say. I have been rolling my eyes at the prompts I've been getting lately. No offense please. I probably could write for them if I tried. I've got to plug my tablet in. |
| It was a fair day for my birthday. Like Christmas, I already had gotten most of my gifts. My sister, Sarah, took me shopping at Dollar Tree. She bought me a few little things. I got a monkey that will hang from my shrine curtains once I get them up. I made a list of things. I called it my W List. I didn't feel I should call it a want list; I already had one of those before and it just made me mad that it wasn't getting done. I didn't feel like calling it a wish list either; basically it is wish in one hand and shovel poop with the other and see which one fills up first. anyways, it has stuff on it like "get my curtains for my shrine up" and "get my wall hangings put up".... there's a couple of other things but I just can't think right noe. What can you do when a friend is headed down a dark path? Try to be a light to show them the right way. |
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Love it! I hope "Kristy Parkers" is revived and publishes very soon!
It's probably cheaper to just buy regular stamps and use a piece of paper and envelope to send the stuff instead of buying a postcard. 
