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 One writer's journey |
 She sat down at her old wooden desk, pen at the ready. Her thoughts raced. What shall I write today? Tilting her head to the side, a small smile tugged at the corner of her mouth before enveloping her delicate face. The purple ink began to fill the once blank sheet, each stroke a labor of pure joy as the words flowed from her mind, her heart, her very soul.  My Dreams... to write of romance and endless love to love without boundaries to learn from past mistakes to laugh with all my heart to be the woman I am meant to be  TODAY... I will reach for the stars Will not give up Will give all that I have Dare to dream the impossible dream For anything in this life is possible    <---I am blown away by this    |
Well it seems a few back to back days of awesomeness is not to be had. On my last excursion to HFCC, I thought I'd hang out in my truck until just before the test. Usually the door is locked until right at the moment the class starts, so I assumed today wouldn't be any different. Boy was I wrong! I turn the corner and am shocked that the door is partially open and not one person is in the hall. As I reach for the door, my professor is looking a bit miffed, and prevents me from going inside. It seems he cannot stay. His wife is labor at the hospital and he has to go. Fine, it's just writing an essay for the final, no biggie. Until he tells me that he would like me to be in charge of the class  Say what? He gives me instructions, waits a few extra minutes, and then makes the big announcement in class. A few people trickled in late, typical anyway. I hated all three prompts.  Again, typical, but I chose a fitting one. I selected the first one, describing the most joyous day of my life, and wrote about the day Zak was born. Brownie points? One can hope.After everyone finished their essay's, I took them upstairs to the English Dept, secretary. She tells me that my professor told her he had a few responsible students that he could hand over the class to. IE ~ old lady in the back of the class. Mwaahahahahahahaa Here's hoping the delivery went smooth, and that I pass my final with flying colors. I'll have my results by 6pm Monday. Maxine Says I was planning to get a flu shot until I found out it isn't a kind of drink. Here's a helpful winter tip: If you leave a tortilla out for a week, you've got yourself a handy little ice scraper. It's beginning to cost a lot like Christmas! If I find a magic hat, I'm not wasting it on a snowman. I'm heading straight for the casion! ~Here's my take on 2009 ~ Another year has passed. Hard to believe we are headed into a new decade, but 2010 is breathing down our necks. This year brought struggles, joys, sorrows and everything in between. If you were one of the lucky ones, you still have your job, your family is healthy, and you can take comfort in your friends and family, knowing they will always be there to lean on. For many, it wasn’t a year filled with happiness. I myself have struggled with finding a new friend only to lose them a few short months later. I find that because of that friendship, I have gained four new ones, unexpected, but very meaningful. How is that even possible? I’ve watched a family lose a beloved mother, hit rock bottom more than once, and yet they were able to turn around and find hope. Remarkable, amazing and very heart-warming to be able to be there through it all, to know that hope is alive and well. Through darkness and tragedy there is light and hope can be found in one another. All we have to do is look for it. There lies the key. If we don’t open our eyes and look for it, we’ll never see it, missing out on one of the most precious gifts there is. It is too easy to lose ourselves in grief, to hardship and desperation, in the daily struggles that come into our lives that make us question why we even bother. To face life, to go head on into the unknown, clinging to that last shred of hope is difficult at best, but if we don’t try, we lose. We lose a part of one another, of ourselves, and a chunk of that light that guides us. When you feel as though you can no longer move forward, that you are beaten and there is nowhere to turn, remember the child who has lost their mother, a grieving spouse, the thousands of homeless, those struggling to make ends meet because they lack a job and all those who battle illness. Remember the families separated by jobs, distance, or war. Take a look around and find that hope. We all possess that light inside of us, the one that lets us forget our own troubles and help those in need. We are capable of stepping up, of rescuing a friend or loved one, becoming the light that brings the promise of a new day to those less fortunate. All we have to do is believe. I believe in hope, in miracles, in family, and the friends that stand by me no matter what. I believe that paths cross for a reason, and there is no point in questioning the why's of it all. I believe that we all serve a purpose in this world, no matter how short our time is, we touch peoples lives in very dramatic ways. Making the most of what we have is vital and showcases our true inner self. No matter how bad things seem, there is a light at the end of the tunnel. If we choose to give up, we not only fail our family and friends, but ourselves, extinguishing our true potential. ~~off my soap box now~~ IT'S FRIDAY BITCHES  |
I can't remember the last time I saw a few days go by and each one got better as the week went on. My MIL was released from the hospital on Tuesday, and hubby and I got to chat with her on the webcam before work that morning, and again this morning. We have our flight set, not when we wanted to leave, but the best we could get without dropping 4k to do so. Apparently Christmas time is considered high season.  So we leave on the 30th, arrive in Beirut 4 hours before 2010. At least we'll be there to ring in the New Year with the family.Now the debate begins over where Zak and Danny will be. When are they old enough to stay home alone with relatives checking in on them? They are good kids, and I think they will be fine on their own. Aside from learning how to do laundry, they are pretty self sufficient. My poem is getting a lot of attention, and between Jason, and Lutzy, it now has a pretty purple ribbon on it. I didn't expect that, but I am honored that, Jason, especially was pleased with it. He was monumental in getting me to finish writing it, and needs to know that without his help, it would still be stalling on line 8. So my new found friend, thanks for the push, and reminding me where hope comes from. The rest of the crew is well, and getting better!!Today Zak took a big leap, and I freaked. He took the truck with his friend to pick up another from school and drive them home. So I said yes right away, since I sure as heck didn't want to have to go back out. But once the reality hit, I started to pace, and send messages to my bf about what was happening. Let's just say I made it through. And Zak came back happy, proud, and a little bit stunned. Off to the kitchen to make cookies for his food class. The boy wants the extra credit. Tired of not getting a solid A in that class. It's messing up his GPA.Must jet, final is in the morning. I survived going back to college at 40! How wicked is that? Oh, and the new partnership between the Quickie and UEN, looks good!!! |
| My darling I ask of you not to leave Consumed, alone in our bed while I grieve My heart shattered a million times over Bearing the thought, the loss of my lover I hear them calling, our brave little men And wish to God I had hope once again Your picture it sits on the dresser right there I can’t help but sit and get lost as I stare For only a moment the pain goes away But again, I quickly get lost in the fray Days turn to night and continue to blend Doing my best to find solace in friends It’s not enough, for all I can see The one I want, isn’t here with me The pain is almost too much to bear My love, my life, is no longer there. And then I hear it, the brave ones they call Their vibrant voices echo from down the hall. Finally, it hits me, and I can clearly see In them, is a big part of you and me. That was my contribution to the Rhyming Poetry Campfire.
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AWESOME! My baby went and passed his driver's test this morning ~ In the rain, and in icy conditions. WOOTS, go Zako, go Zako, go, go, go Zako. Yeah, he hates that nickname I gave him when he was only a day old. Gawd imagine my surprise when I see they want him to back into the parking spot, knowing it's something we NEVER practiced. It didn't matter, he did it, and amazed his mother who stood out in the cold watching.  I only have one thing to say. That's my boy! Been so crazy around here. I am close to hoping a jet tomorrow to go help out when my MIL is released from the hospital on Tuesday. It can be done, but it would mean I would miss my final exam. I worked hard to pass that class, and am getting a solid A. Only thing is, it is only and pass or fail class. So if I had to miss the final, I would just have to see if I could take the grammar portion of the entrance exam to ENG 131 again. I have learned a lot in that class, and accomplished my goal, so it's all good. Family comes first, and if I'm needed I will go. Squeaked out my quickie entry, and I hate it. And now for some exciting news.... "The Weekly Quickie Contest"  by Dawn Embers  IS NOW  This means that prizes have been adjusted. So please check out the contest, and if you haven't joined UEN, I ask you to do so. It's the only Newsletter I get anymore, and I am always excited to find it in my email. I have a sick friend, so I'm sending some healing vibes their way. And Dr. T's advice, rest, rest, and more...you guessed it REST.  MAXINE SAYS I decided to do my Christmas 'not buying anybody anything' early this year. Ok...done! My house is filled with the sweet aroma of freshly-baked holiday treats. Yep, those scented candles come in every fragrance you can think of. I've decided to bake this Christmas. So don't tell me miracles don't happen. The holidays are a great time to give of yourself. Yeah, if I was ever going to, this would be the time. No question. I like nice warm muffins in the morning. So I wear long johns. It's lovely weather for a sleigh ride. Especially if you enjoy staring at a horse's rear end while freezing your jingle bells off. NOW who can't relate to that? T is out! |
| Pretty Boy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V3N5CsXYlCk For you, Ja. You can do anything you set your mind to! ~Misty Sometimes we fall down and can't get back up we're hiding behind skin that's too tough how come we don't say I love you enough till it's to late, it's not too late Our hearts are hungry for a food that won't come we could make a feast from these crumbs and we're all staring down the barrel of a gun so if your life flashed before you what would you wish you would've done Yeah... gotta start lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here this is all we got and we gotta start pickin it every second counts on a clock that's tickin' gotta live like we're dying We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live like we're dying And if your plane fell out of the skies who would you call with your last goodbyes should be so careful who we live out our lives so when we long for absolution there'll no one on the line Yeah... gotta start lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here this is all we got and we gotta start pickin it every second counts on a clock that's tickin' gotta live like we're dying We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live like we're dying Like we're dying oh-- like we're dying [x2] We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live -- like we're dying We never know a good thing till it's gone you never see a crash until it's head on all those people right when we're dead wrong you never know a good thing till it's gone Yeah... gotta start lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here this is all we got and we gotta start livin it every second counts on a clock that's tickin' gotta live like we're dying We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live like we're dying Like we're dying oh -- like we're dying [x2] We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live like we're dying live like we're dyin |
| Yep, that's what it's been around here. My MIL had a successful quad bypass on Wednesday. With the time change, it was hard for us to sleep Tuesday night knowing it was happening. By the time I got up at 6, I had two text messages saying the surgery was a success. When we called we learned it even took less time than originally thought. Bonus. My MILs a strong woman, that's for sure! When I spoke to her on the phone Tuesday afternoon, she was more concerned about me, telling me not to worry, or be upset that she was going to be fine, it was no big deal. Gotta love it. So it looks as if hubby and I will be ringing in the New Year in Libnan. I heard him on the phone when they specifically told him that neither of us could come alone. Come as a couple, or don't come at all. OUCH! Man those in-laws can be a right pain. The last winter I spent in Lebanon was in 1995, so it's probably long over due as far as they're concerned. Hubby went in December 07 for the Eid Ikbier and New Years 08'. He'd missed going in 06' for our regular vacation when the boys and I were evacuated from the war that summer. Today is my last class! Woots. Have a quiz, and will get the final essay exam prompts to look over for the next week until the test on the 18th. Not really worried about it. There is no way I can fail, so as long as I stay on topic, it should be fine. Here's to hoping that when he narrows down the 10 prompts to 3, one of them is something I'm interested in writing about. Sent out the xmas cards, all with Zak's senior pix. Can't wait to hear what everyone has to say about it. My favorite part of switching the picture out in the 8x10 frame is seeing how much the boys have changed from year to year. They were so shocked when I called them in to scope. Zak looked so miserable in his 7th grade picture, and even he knew it. In one year Danny has had a lot of growth and it's easy to see his face changing. Sigh, my babies aren't babies any more. DAMN IT! Can't I keep them little forever, when you get those strangling hugs because they don't want to let go because they think their parent is the most incredible person on the planet?????? Oh, the hand. Yeah, it sux. Enough said? LOL. Waiting on the witch that calls herself my doctor to send the paperwork downtown so I can see a hand specialist. Did some reading this morning on the net, and after my ER visit on Saturday, I am leaning toward the torn ligament. I ruled out Carpal Tunnel all on my own. And since it is difficult to find any information about a torn muscle in the palm, I'd say the ligament is probably the most accurate. Dr. T is in the house! Well, out into the freakin freezing Michigan morning to class that is... Stay warm and toasty! |
| You know that saying When it rains, it pours. Yeah, well, I hate it, and it's freaking true, which is most likely why I hate it. See how this works? We found out on Sunday that my mother-in-law had a heart attack. It sucks that we are in the States and she is in Lebanon. It's been a pretty wild ride of a week as we wait for more information. Tomorrow we should get confirmation as to when the surgery will take place. They have the surgeon and hospital in place, always a good thing. She is resting comfortably at home until she goes in for the operation. I am hoping hubby will go over and be with the family, but some are telling him not to come. It's a major sore spot for me, so I won't even bother to comment. A good friend is in the hospital as well. Seems like the days ahead will be a little more difficult, which is never fun. I work hard to keep that positive attitude going, but damn sometimes I just want to wallow in the crap for a bit. Can't seem to help it from time to time. Really think it has a lot to do with the fact that I can't come up with the next plan of action. Easy to keep going when you have direction. Without it, I tend to get lost and sit in limbo. My friend needs me, and I will be there. Just need to find that well and dig a bit deeper. My last two quizzes earned 20/20. Not bad for taking two in less than one hour. These were essay's based on prompts. Only have four more classes to go and the final on the 18th. With everything going on, I already discussed things with my professor. I am allowed to miss the classes,but have to be there for the final exam. Was tempted to see if I could take it early, but I figure I'd better wait until I know for sure if hubby is flying over. MAXINE SAYS I've got the perfect cell phone plan fo ryou. Don't talk on one if you're anywhere near me. Road rage in this country has become a serious problem. Especially for people who cut me off in traffic. I'd gladly trade service with a smile for service with a brain. Forgive me if I snap at you. I'm myself today. I think of myself as an equal opportunity annoyer. Just once I'd like to see a TV talk show that reunites the audience members with their brains. I envy the Pilgrims. Imagine having an entire ocean between you and all your relatives! I'm getting my house ready for Thanksgiving. You know, turning out the lights, pulling the shades, locking the doors. ~~I'm out~~ |
| So yesterday was the big day to get the decorations up outside. What a slow go I tell ya. First off, I had to clean the gutters, and I loathe that job. By the time I finished hanging the icicle lights, the strands decided to piss me off and some lit, others only partially. I swear I have lights that are over 10 years old, and I never have any trouble with them. The ones I bought only a few years back, suck, suck and suck some more! So I get them hung, the living room is a major mess with bags of lights all over the place, and then...hubby come home. We hit the remote (yes, I have all my outside lights on remote control. I so love the person who invented them!) and the light up, shut them off, and viola.....NOTHING. So hubby decides he has always hated the newer sets since we've had nothing but problems with them, and drags me up to Home Depot to check on the new LED beauties. We buy four boxes, and now it's cold, and dark, and my lovely hubby decides we should hang them and check em out. Hang the new sets, which only covered half of the front of the house, switch the older sets around, plug them in, and OMG. The new lights are wickedly awesome, and the old one..........ewww, nasty. The new ones are whitish blue and the ones this dull yellowish color. I so need more strands of LED lights. After that, hubby and I ran up to Meijer and Target. I have been searching for purple lights for two years, always missing them. Struck out at Meijer, but Target NEVER let's me down. Got four sets of purple, and made the tree outside purple and green, woots. Zak is sick. My poor baby. Doesn't want me to come near him because he doesn't want me to catch it. Well, I'M THE MOM. There is no way I can stay away. Took him to the clinic to find out he has a viral infection. Hubby has this weird bubble in his eye. Tried to find an eye doctor open, but no luck. Will have to try again tomorrow. This morning we got bad news from Lebanon. My MIL had a heart attack and is in the hospital. Cath is scheduled for tomorrow morning. I am hoping I can convince the man to fly over and see for himself that she is ok. I know how he gets. It's never any fun when his parents are sick because it's all he can think about. Bugs the crap out of me that we were the last to know. That no one bothered to send me a dang text message from there that only cost's them 17cents, irks me. I admit it. Only makes things worse when we are so far away and things get sugar coated. Guess that's all I got. Have homework I haven't touched and need to get back into the revision game with Megan's. |
| http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Avul8a2n3po I dont mind where you come from As long as you come to me But I dont like illusions I cant see Them clearly I dont care, no I wouldn't dare To fix the twist in you You've shown me eventually what you'll do I dont mind I dont care As long as you're here [Chorus] Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again You'll just come back running Holding your scarred heart in hand It's all the same And I'll take you for who you are If you take me for everything And do it all over again It's all the same Hours slide and days go by Till you decide to come But in-between it always seems too long Suddenly But I have the skill, yeah I have the will, to breath you in while I can However long you stay is all that I am I dont mind, I dont care As long as you're here Go ahead and tell me you'll leave again You'll just come back running Holding your scarred heart in hand It's all the same And I'll take you for who you are If you take me for everything And do it all over again It's always the same Wrong or Right Black or White If I close my eyes Its all the same In my life The compromise I'll close my eyes Its all the same Go ahead say it You're leaving You'll just come back running Holding your scarred heart in hand It's all the same And I'll take you for who you are now If you take me for everything Do it all over again It's all the same |
| My addition Why did life turn out like this? How could you be so damned remiss? Friendship, love and hope I gave Just how am I now to behave? The loss of one, is suddenly two For you and I are also through What should have been a friendship found You’ve turned and stomped into the ground. Tell me where you think you’ll turn With all the bridges that you’ll burn. Pity, doubt, and trust broken Feelings bottled left unspoken. This path you choose to walk alone All along I should have known.
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Now, any feeders I have are taken away at the end of August. 
MAD indeed! I know how you feel, Vertigo-wise. I've had it for years. When peeps call me a dizzy dame, it's for real. 
