*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/1starsong/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/34
Review Requests: OFF
7,130 Public Reviews Given
7,195 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... 30 31 32 33 -34- 35 36 37 38 39 ... Next
826
826
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season Jellyfish! *Gingerbread*

Oh wow! How charming is this nursery rhyme type poem. Your parody is brilliant and didn't miss a beat as I read it aloud. It follows the original quite well. *Thumbsup*

I enjoyed your choice of creatures as they are an unexpected pair as in the original version. A great surprise. I had to smile at the PHD line as it so fit the bird! How they met was humourous as well.

The format was effective with a rhyme scheme consistent through out the verses and punctuation served the read and meaning. It was an entertaining drama. I like the addition of the jellyfish--as it is your handle. *Cool*

I notice you are missing an apostrophe in "mermaids hand" to make it possessive. (mermaid's}. *Wink*

This was fun and a trip down memory lane for the Owl and the Pussycat I do recall! *Smile* Thanks for sharing your vivid vision.*Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
827
827
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Snow1*HI Moarzjasac! I hope you are having a Happy december! I found this alluring title and it fits our winter season so here I am! *Snow1* The title is descriptive and directs me to the theme.

*Snow2*The scene you create in this narrative poem is enchanting and it is easy to visualize. Your descriptive language creates vivid imagery and so captures the essence of silence in the winter land scape.

*Snow3*I really enjoyed the choice of pictures like the kids foot prints under the new fall of snow, the "quilt", the "cushion" and the weak light from the lamp. They each add to the space you observe.
I did notice you use the same idea twice in verse one --eg quilt and blanket refer to the same thing. *Smile*

*Snow4* Are you missing the word "a" in line 5: "it is a smooth"?
I see you are missing one bracket on center in the first line. *Wink*
The last two lines both ahve the word "falling" and I wonder if variety might be better. Although the idea of both falling together is cool!

*Snow5* Thanks for sharing this seasonal vision. I am seeing a deer as the single animal track. *Smile* I often see them going across my drive and to the bush after a snow fall. *Wink* The idea that we all leave evidence but winter can blank out our tracks is appealing too. Your message is so clear and I had fun entering the dream.

Happy day!
eyestar
Eyestar sig from Fanstasy shop
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
828
828
Review of quiet pool  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season Moarzjasac! *Gingerbread* Happy holidays and happy 7th WDC anniversary. *Balloong*

Wow! This pond looks mystical and as if muses live there. It reflects calmness and I like how the photo captured the reflections in the water. *Cool* I could see using this to meditate on and my muse might be inspired. *Wink*

In your description you do not say if you took the photo and made the sig, or someone else. I like the lettering for its smooth elegance. I would like to know where this is. *Smile*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*
829
829
Review of Christmas  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season Chris! *Gingerbread*

*Xmastree* Tis the season so I had to check out the Christmas title and this form. I see it is for the recent contest. I have yet to compose one yet. It is on my to do list. *Wink*

I like the seasonal theme and your use of the poem as a greeting! The simplicity is present and the vibe is sincere. You did a great job with the inner "stairstep" rhyme. I bet that is the tough part of the form to get right. You managed to make it meaningful as well.

The idea of sending "love" and letting it alight like a light on the tree of the receiver is lovely and magical.

I am glad you explained about teh punctuation as it is a concern to some folks if they do not know. I had read in haiku that some names/places were capitalized though. *Confused* *Smile*

This was delighful and good luck in the contest. *Starstruck* Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
830
830
Review of Scars  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season Dave! *Gingerbread*


*Cat* The title appealed to me as it could take me in various directions and I like cinquains. *Wink*

AW! This image is precious and so fitting for a cinquain poem. The last line had an emphatic punch to it and so evocative of that creature's essence. LOL It was lovely to read aloud as you had some effective sound qualities. {alliteration, assonance etc. eg."paw, across, scars, marked"} I appreciate how well planned it is. Magic.

The poem is well contructed and I like that the poet is speaking to the animal , who then responds. How unique! *Thumbsup* The picture of the cat's action and effect is so vivid and the word "heart" (instead of chest) underlies the affection between you. Nice choice. I had to laugh at the idea of "ownership"! Right on! *Laugh*

You really captured the relationship of cat and owner and the title really works. Scars can be memories, light or dark. This was fun. Thanks for sharing your vision. It brought back memories of my black cat Merlin, who passed on a while back. He was the owner for sure as a TAURUS with a scorpio moon!*Laugh*

Carry on entertaining and enlightening us with your word wizardry.*Wand*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*

831
831
Review of The Cricket Choir  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season Dave! *Gingerbread*


*Ornament1b* Your title caught me attention and made me smile. I enjoyed the alliterative sound and image it evoked!

I am not familiar with this form so thanks for the links that always teach us something. *Thumbsup* I studied ancient Greek language long ago so it is interesting to check out this form.

It was a delight to read your rendering with its vivid imagery and well chosen conventions to create a flowing and appealing soundscape. I admire your word wizardry. "wavy wormy tendrils" is so creative and evocative as to how uncomfortable it is...the "wormy" bit stikes me. LOL I liked the personification elements as well. "shade..crawls" and "stars..dance" and of course the "cricket choir"! The last two lines are a lulling picture by themselves. It is a seranade, though can be annoying if one is trying to sleep. *Laugh*

I can hear the creaky rocker at the beginning balanced with the similar sound of crickets at the end. Well planned! The poem takes on the journey of the day coming to a close and the scene is shown with such detail in the short lines of the form. It was easy to enter into the vision and linger there. *Salute*

It is fascinating that each verse is basically one sentence broken in pieces with apt punctuation. Marvelous as it did not feel unweidly or hard to follow in a coherent way. *Smile*

The form is constructed according to the pattern and the theme of an everyday happening fits the criteria of the form. It is enchanting moment in time. The philosophical image near the end adds another depth and dimension to your expression.{eg. river of life, sea of death are evocative ) Awesome. *Starstruck*

I had fun with this one! Thanks for sharing your vision and craft and for all your contributions over the years! Keep on shining as the *Star* bard you are. *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **


*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
832
832
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Heart**Fairy*Peace and Joy of the season sonali! *Gingerbread*

*Laugh*Oh wow! This is a charming and entertaining Christmas story and I liked the twist of Mrs. Claus being his mom and using WDC Angel Army as characters. Lovely way to do a tribute to the group celebrating 10 years. *Heart*

*Santahat*The pace was lively and the character of Mrs. Claus motherly and vivid as she sets about solving the problem. The dialogue was purposeful and added to the drama. The narration voice consistent.
Good job with showing Santa speaking like he has a cold! *Wink*

I notice you need to put quotes in the first line after "you?" and a comma after the "I said."

*Fairy* I had to laugh at the disorganization of Santa as you show so clearly in your descriptions of the mobile, the drawer, and comments from mom and rudolph about his directions. LOL I like the light hearted banter and vibe of the tale!

Thanks for sharing this humourous episode that brought cheer to my day! A wonderful read. *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
** Image ID #1798477 Unavailable **



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
833
833
Review of Turkey  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* HI chris! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Chicken*LOL This short poem reveals a factual event and I like the way you personify the bird. I had to smile to think of him "waiting" as if he knows what is coming.

I do not know it this is a certain form. It reads as one long sentence so I am not sure why each line has capitals. I thought the third line was redundant as the reader can assume that the Thanksgiving is for this year. I think a more potent description for the way it smelled make it more vivid and sense appealing than "good". *Wink*

The down play of drama is appealing as the poet is reflecting on the reality of the turkey's role. *Star*

Thanks for the tribute to a turkey and thanksgiving. *Smile*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
834
834
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC Olivia! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Fairy* What a great theme for a poem. People with siblings can easily identify with your mixed reactions to your brother and sister..and any body really as we are all combinations of personal traits as we develop. I loved the last line as I think we take on similar qualities from family and as we grow and become aware of being even more than the labels or mimicries we learn from home.

*Fairy2* I like the free flow style for this content and the way it lays on the page as you contrast the qualities you see in each sibling.

*Quill* I notice a typo near the end in the word "thaem">them. I wanted to drop the word "people" as the meaning of individuals covers it.

*Fairy* I appreciate your awareness and ability to see this in your family and in yourself. I am the eldest of 6 so I totally get how being the "responsible" one had me taking on a role of caretaking, hoping the younger ones will turn out ok and/or wish they would follow the rules as I did. LOL

Thanks for sharing your experience and vision that took me on a trip back in memory lane. *Wink**Thumbsup* a heartfelt tribute!

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
835
835
Review of Life Exists  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloony*HI Prosperous Snow! *Delight* I am happy to review to celebrate you as your item popped up on random reads!

I enjoy philosophical themes and your title appealed to me and represents the theme and belief of your essay. Your premise is well stated and easy to follow.

Your second paragraph expressed your beliefs in a straightforward manner and the repetition o fhte word "believe" is effective as it made me think of a CREDO. Your notion that the ONE is represented in many ways is inspirational and gives potency to the idea of a harmonious intent of the Creator.

The writing is coherent. I did think the concept at the end of the second sentnce might be expanded--what things would they be? *Wink*

Thanks for sharing your vision and inspiring me to ponder. *Star*

Keep the ink flowing as you follow your muse and write on!*Star*
eyestar
Sig for blog/reveiws

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
836
836
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Balloony*Hiya webwitch! Guess who popped up on the random reads!*Bigsmile* I am happy to review to celebrate you. *Wink*

*Fire* I had so much fun reading this delicious tale with its marvelous flow, humour and enthusiastic tone! I love how you tell a tale and use bit of alliteration and word wizardry for interest and lively vibes. It always feels like you are right there speaking!

*Fire*Your description are so detailed and vivid that I can imagine those tough timber men and you "hot winging through the land! You tell your family story like a tall tale and it is so entertaining. I appreciate your style.

*Fire* The title got my attention and evoked curiosity and a laugh as I had an idea I was in for a fun ride! The way you weave in humour and use tricks like real men don't eat quiche to compare with the way they devour wings is brilliant. *Starstruck*

These home tales are well worth keeping. I like how you end with a pondering as I think we all do that. *Wink* Thanks for the fun tonight! Made my day! *Laugh*

Keep the ink flowing as you follow your muse and write on!*Star*
eyestar
Sig for blog/reveiws

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann
837
837
Review of Winter Loon  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Balloonp* HI winklett! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Fairy*I was drawn to your title as I love watching loons and the idea of winter in its stark contrasts relating to the loon is appealing and poetic notion. It made me curious.

*Fairy*I am not familiar with this form but I so enjoyed reading it aloud with its echoing rhymes throughout. The alliterative second line is my favourite to read and an evocative notion. I did look it up--you could add an author;s note to the end as it is quite interesting. The syllable counts are spot on the soundscape seems to fit well.

The imagery is so vivid that I could enter your vision with ease. It is so beautiful to ponder. "newly hewn" is a fascinating idea too.

I so admire the effort creating this moving vision in this complex format. *Salute* It was delightful to read. Impressive! *Starstruck* Thanks for sharing!

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
838
838
Review of Chocolate Patrol  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloony*Welcome Lady Elf to WDC and to POWER! *Delight* I am happy to review to celebrate you *Delight*

*Choco* I love chocolate so I could not resist the title and the notion of trolls was magical and appealing! *Laugh*

*Choco**Laugh* Oh, this is so delightful and fun to read! Your descriptions are so vivid so the images pop and the added dialogue brought the drama and trolls to life. It made me laugh to think of them being so "helpful" to a chocolate addict..er... or well they really do enjoy their treats. Their excuse for being there makes sense, but uh..really?? And the mess they made is yucky! *Thumbsup* "laces of drool" *Pthb* It shows your wonderful imagination. *Star*

*Choco* The verse structure was pretty solid with consistent rhyme and it flowed quite easily when I read it aloud.

*ChocO* A few glitches I noticed: Mostly in the area of punctuation for clarity.
1. me "are you Mrs. Smith,
For leave.." I think you need a period or comma after "me" and as it is a question, a question mark is needed. I was confused by "for leave this house".

2>"come with me.." should have quotation marks as the troll speaks in this line.

3. At the end of verse 4 you have quotations as the troll speaks. Now in the next 3 verses trolls speak as well. If it is the same troll--you only need to use quotations before and at the end of his speech. {after "patrol" in v 7} Every time you add quotations it signifies another speaker so I thought one speaker made sense. *Smile*
4. "were teh ...trolls" should be "we're" for "we are" in the last couplet.

*Choco* I like the summation of the last couplet as it sounds like a chant. I could here them singing! *Laugh*

*Starstruck*Thanks so much for sharing this bit of fun and I hope the chocolate patrol stay up your way! I love my chocolate and have no other treats here. *Wink*
Well conceived and constructed poem with potent energy in its expression. I appreciate your vision! *Heart*

Keep the ink flowing as you follow your muse and write on!*Star*

eyestar
Sig for blog/reveiws

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
839
839
Review of My Blue Fairy  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*HIJeannie! I am back as it seems I am fairy hunting! So many on our "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group Raid list. *Heart*. *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Fairy2* Oh wow! This etherial looking fairy is elegant and dreamlike. I love her sparkly wand and imagine her ready to do her magic. The style is different and I wonder how she is made with its dot like brush strokes. I imagine her as a nighttime wish fairy. *Smile*

*Fairy3* Did you make her or find her? The name Iris rather suits her and makes me interested in reading your story. I will get to it after the raid. *Wink* I am sure these pictures add an element of fairy realism to your writing. It is so appealing. *Star*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
Colorful Flowers

840
840
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*HI Jeannie! I am review raiding with "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group. *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

*Fairy*I love fairies and she is so precious in her elegant greens. I like the style of wings and her active pose. She looks alluring as if to call one to follow! Seh reminds me of a dancer. What a wonderful image of a dancer in the air. I am curious to read your story now! *Wink*

*Fairy2*I wondered if a little note about where you found her or created her would be fun for those of us with inquiring fairy kin minds. *Bigsmile* I am glad she was on our raid list or I would not have found her and your story link! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
Colorful Flowers

841
841
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart**Fairy*HI Maryann! I am review raiding with "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group. *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*


*Fairy2*Oh wow! I love fairies and here you have captured one. She looks happy in her magical home! *Fairy* The sparkling stars give it that magical touch and adding butterflies makes sense as a symbol too.

*Butterflyo*The colours are co-ordinated and appealing. I have not seen it before so I wonder where and when you apply it. Did you create it or was it a gift? Or if you found it, where do find such cool things?

*Star*Thanks for sharing this on our raid list! Who knew? *Wink*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
Colorful Flowers

842
842
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*Heart**Fairy*HI Bluelightning *Lightning3*! I am review raiding with "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group. *Rainbowl**Rainbowr*

This is a great question for a food poll as there are so many types of apples. I see in our choices though there are only colours of apples--rather than type? *Wink* I wonder about tweaking the title to suit colours or expand the poll to add some variety types--like delicious, royal gala, etc. though some types may also come in different colours. *Smile*

The choice is easy adn giving the choice of other adds a chance for all other types and reponses. *Thumbsup*

Your intro is short and to the point. I was interested to know your reason for the interest in the subject and what your fav is. It would be nice to have a little blurb there in your intro. Hey you could also use some *Apple* emoticons. Make it pop.

Thanks for this bit of fun and for trying out making polls! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!!*Star*

eyestar
Colorful Flowers
GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of eight Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann

843
843
Review of NANOWRIMO  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC K8! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


Your inspiring note showed up on the Random Reads today so I thought I would say YAY and GOOD for YOU for jumping into NANOwriMO! *Salute*

It iw wonderful that your children are excited for you too. It is so great to have a cheer squad to keep the blahs away and to remember that the idea is to write without the critic voice! *Smile*

Do you mean STATIC item for SYatic item. I think it is a typo. *Wink* and "Im" needs to be "I'm" but don't sweat the small stuff. You are NANO ing! *Bigsmile*

Thanks for sharing your enthusiasm. Good luck with the task! *Starstruck*

PS did you join the NANO wrimo group here or did you miss it? Great support. "NaNoWriMo Write-A-Thon
Might be late to join the fun here--but you can find others involved in Nano! *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **

844
844
Review of Bad Move  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Hiya winklett! This little poem popped up on Random reads! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


The title made me curious so I had to read on and was happy to be entertained by your short rhyming verse. *Delight* I like the idea of your first line--like a dictionary entry. Brilliant.*Star*

The poem was fun to read with its consistent rhyme, and alliterative quality. I like how the words flowed off the tongue especially with its consonance. The enjambent in line one was effective as well to emphasize the action of "swish". I wondered about adding the word "a" before "reptile's.." though I do see your lines are balanced with syllable counts, which is so cool too.

The description of images was vivid and the notion of "witless" and the last words were appealing and clear in meaning! *Thumbsup* I had to smile! And say aww! at the same time.

Thanks for sharing this unique creation which gives a clear observation to define the mangrove environment. Well done! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
845
845
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Fairy* HI Pure SciFi! Oh my gosh!*Shock**Delight* These cnotes are absolutely stunning and so cool for the "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group group. I love the space theme as I see our Power ship flying through WDC Space. The coloured fonts are happy and positive like rainbows and make me think of our quality of kindness and fun!

This is a wonderful contribution and surprise for us all! Having one for each occasion like Anniversary, Birthday, New crew and Just thinking of you is convenient and practical! I will be using these for sure!

Home Away from Home is awesome thought as we do kind of get addicted here. *Laugh*

I would have no idea how to do this. Good for you!!

You so rock for creating this to make the group shine. And They will come in useful for our 10th anniversary celebrations next year. I am so thrilled. I have to go send one! *Wink*

Thanks for your creative vision! *Starstruck* If you like I will add this shop to our "Superpower Reviewers HUB and mention it in my next group note! *Heart*

*Salute* Power Crewman!

eyestar
WDC Power Personal Star sig
846
846
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Treepine*Greetings! Thank you so much for entering the "Haiku Hunt Contest! *Delight* Here I am with my brief comments on your shining entry.

This is a fascinating poem and my mind pondered your two contrasting images that may or may not be. I saw a poor woman show up at the door and then we switch to a squirrel mother. I am not sure if you meant those two images--it is what I saw--which adds to the surprise element so hard to get in haiku. The drawing of the reader's mind to reach their own conclusion and enter the dream is part of haiku magic.

I might have dropped the word "mother" as you say "with child" and so we can assume the noun.

I could really see the image of the squirrel as begging for food too. *Smile* With the word "she", one does relate to the squirrel where at first I got the idea of a woman. Nice play!

Thanks for sharing your vision and creation of haiku! *Starstruck*

Good luck in the contest! *Shamrock*

eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
847
847
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Hi Lelouch! This interesting item popped up in the Random reads today! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Star*What Brilliant idea to tabulate and expand on your interactive characters. Wow! You really know them well and have lots of interesting details that wrtiers could use in the interactive. Impressive and well conceived.

I like the idea of adding the characters that other writers add during the interactive as well. It makes a handy reference if folks need to quickly get a handle on whose you---especially inf interactive is long and new ones may not be reading it all.

The scope of characteristics held by the characters is wide and makes for interesting possibilities of interaction!
I get a feel that you really appreciate the interactive and its participants and really want the story to rock!

It was pretty easy to read and follow too. I noticed "tuotor" should be "tutor" if you mean mentor under Melanie Silverman. *Wink*

I am sure this will be a helpful reference for your interactive and does save space on its intro page! Good thinking. *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **

848
848
Review of Mom  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC thomasmcharg! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


This wonderful tribute to your mom touched my heart too with its gentle sincere voice. The picture you share of mothers is vivid in the examples of her wisdom and caring that you chose. *Thumbsup*

The poem seems to be a freer style though it does have consistent rhyme scheme and it flows well. There are places where the rhythm count is not exact but it did not take away from the read and meaning.

I did notice the rhyme pattern where every two lines rhymed. IT was off a bit in the middle with "near" "be" and "dear". tough to get those ideas in and rhyme. The poem was still pleasing to read aloud.

I did wonder at the one longer line ending in reside. It did throw me out a bit. I wonder as the idea of "going to God" and "heaven" has similar meaning, you could just use one of the symbols to help the flow. eg. "you've gone to Heaven, where you now reside". Or not, as your intent may be it emphasize both as you do mention her love for God. I was just speaking about the poetic flow. Only a POV. *Smile*
Might need to tweak the grammar of the line though.

I just had an idea for the rhyme there--as I see you have an off rhyme with "eyes". Maybe get an image of "skies" or "rise". *Wink*

The overall feeling and flow of the poem is strong as you have us enter the experience and many can relate to the mom archetype. The voice is so personal and vulnerable and easy to receive its message. It feels like it could be about your own mom. Good job! *Star*

*Fairy* Thanks for sharing your vision and craft.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar

** Image ID #1815342 Unavailable **
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
849
849
Review of Pay It Forward  
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Heart* Helloooo Bears! I could not pass by this altruistic program in my search for Positive uplifting items at WDC as part of my "a very Wodehouse challenge! *Wink*
I have been the recipient of such wonders and it lightened my spirit and my day! *Delight*

*Sun* It is marvelous that you created this based on that movie and your intent is very clear as to what you do. Your explanation and rationale is detailed and easy to follow on a page that is organised and appealing. Very professional style with a friendly inviting voice.

*Sun* I like that you clarify what you are not and cannot do so people cannot misundertand your function.

*Sun* I was struck by the line "we try to help where we can". I think it can be more potent to say "We help where we can." The last bit cancels the need for try. And in the words of YODA--no try, do! LOL The energy of try in also heavy to me.
You either sit or not, not try to. You have made clear what you do and why. *Wink*

*Sun*I wondered if it would be of value to link your Guest book or other forum for readers to find to see more. *Wand* Curious minds want to search. *Glassesp*

*Starstruck* This is a well conceived and inspirational program and I appreciate its longevity and *Heart* Thanks for sharing the dream and vision of a supportive
community who contributes because it is kind and fun and says we are all loved. We are all in it together on this planet after all. Thanks too for acting on the vision and inspiring us to do so! *Angel* Carry on. *Butterfly* *Fairy*

eyestar
A  birthday gift


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
850
850
Review by eyestar~*
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Sun* HI Jay! I was searching for positive uplifting vibes as part of my "a very Wodehouse challenge and was drawn to this shining item! *Delight* The title was evocative in its contrasting the two ideas and I was curious to read it.

*Sun* The poem is a lovely tribute to the notion of determination, teamwork, doing your best and that winning is not always the important thing and to persevere can lead to the most unlikely winners. Your chosen examples are heartwarming and the images are vivid. I was caught up in the positive vibes that are reflected in each verse. I could really see that little "fat boy" kicking his heels. *Delight*
You really capture the essence and strength of the human soul and how the good vibes of others can help rally others. *Thumbsup* And even failures can lead to triumphs.

*Sun*I was inspired when reading of these events and some I do recall!

*Sun*The poem is well structured and fun to read with a consistent rhyme scheme and pleasing rhythm.

*Sun*Thanks for sharing this upbeat and moving expression that evokes us to ponder what greatness we may have within, as these folks found out. What else is possible?

Keep on sharing you light as you write on, being the *Star* you are. *Starstruck*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2,527 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 102 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/1starsong/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/34