This is the first of my poetry reviews from WhoMe's Birthday Bash. Apologies for the delay. I have been having internet problems.
This poem is beautiful! I cannot understand why so few people have reviewed it. Your words flow so smoothly and are so lyrical - which I have noticed in other poetry of yours before.
This was my favourite verse -
With eyes that look deep, I see you,
with mind wide open, I offer my heart.
with hands to touch, to hold, to feel
I hear your words, hear music start.
I see it was italicised - which made me wonder if these words were the inspiration for your poem....and if so, it did absolute justice.
Very powerful, and so inspiring.
Regards
Cherry-Anne
Hi there,
I loved this poem! On 3rd July it will be a year since my mom donned her angel's wings too and your poem had for the first time, made me realise it was a journey she wanted to make. She has no more pain and is reunited with old friends and knows she wll be there to welcome us when its our time.
Your poem was so inspiring and so we'll written. Lovely flow of words. Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
This was really good ! I liked the form you used - which as you say, gives a much stronger impact. One doesnt realise how hurtful this bullying can be, and your words show the lethal toxicity that the wrong words can give.
Would have been such a waste to forget to post it.
Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This is really beautiful, wonderfully told - great visuals, very poetically moving.
This is the way that it should be - a one on one relationship with God, no other people's ideas of Churches - just a place where we can worship where we feel closest.
This was good! Much more relevant than mine. Yours is so much more about the entire topic, and your words bring home the truths of why bullying takes place, and that sometimes parents are to blame, either by their own bullying, or their lack of interest. Scary thoughts, and it makes me cringe for society and what it has become. the scariest part is who will click the problem away. Technology is addictive.
This is awesome! I knew you were a REALLY good poet and this just reinforces it... This is really really good - exceptional! I can feel hair on my arms standing, a shiver running down my spine.
I don't envy Kansaspoet his task but In my mind, this is an undeniable WIN!
Wow - I'm speechless.
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This must have taken quite a while to get it just right - using both the first and the last letters to form you title. Well done for that! Commended too for the body of your poem which moves so smoothly.{e:smile]
Do we ever uncover life's untold mysteries?
Write on!
Very enjoyable.
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This poem has a lovely lyrical quality to it, and I enjoyed some of the visuals that were created by your words.
I noticed there were a few places where I faltered..... Examples follow - Who shall I sink to with .... such a lover with a sad eyes ...this mortal dances ...has God wept on us - i believe he is....
These are all grammatical errors - I'm not sure whether they were intended or not, but they do cause a hiccup in the reading.
Keep writing.
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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An interesting philosophy, but not one I would agree with.
Life is wonderful, unbelievably amazing, and each day of life should should be treasured as such.
What do you possibly achieve with death? This sounds like such a good topic for an open discussion. I am sure you would get so many different responses to this.
Your words may have had more impact, if you had paragraphed them. The way you have written it, it's just one solid mass. Try to break it up a little.I hope that you will continue to write, and in doing so, find that life is not that bad.
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This story was so sad, but inspiring at the same time.
At one point, it looked like the fairytale had happened for you, and then it slipped away.
However, it didn't, it was great to see that although the relationship died, the dream didn't, and from this story we can take heart, that we fall down, get up, learn a lesson and move on... searching for that elusive but not impossible dream. And remember, half the fun is in the journey.
Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This was truly a beautiful poem. It started off well and just got better and better. Your words are so eloquent and painted such a wonderful picture. A totally different perspective of night time, and how one gains strength from it, as well as peace as harmony. I can't tell you which is my favorite line, because they all are.
I have no choice but to visit your port.
Write on!
Cherry-Anne
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I havent a clue what you are talking about, as I am from South Africa.
However, I have given you a high rating for initiative and it would seem, attention to detail. You have obviously studied these people and come to this conclusion, and judging from your already five star rating, you must be spot on in your assessment!
Took half a point off because you didn't tell us how they would get the professor to side with them.
Write on regardless!
Kind regards
Cherry-Anne
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I enjoyed reading this, and thought it was so clever the way you fitted the titles in, making it a totally believable story. It was catchy and witty and just what I needed.
I couldn't see any flaws in it at all.
Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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I could feel my heart actually squeeze with disbelief, and horror. Just a moment's action caused a lifelong reaction to all those affected by that deed. My heart broke with the visual you created of the mother and daughter's embrace.
Such a sad poem, Sherri, and yet so beautifully written. I have a feeling this poem won't leave me in a hurry.
Kind regards
Cherry-Anne
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This poem in a way is such a paradox, or at least, the subject is. Time does seem to stand still, and yet happens so fast. Depending I suppose, on what it is you are looking for.
Your poem exquisitely reminds us of this, and the mysterious powerful witching hour....a lovely poem, can be interpreted in so many ways.
Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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This is such a sweet story, with a lovely message at the end of it.
I was dying to know what was in the box, so you held my attention all the way through to the end. Any more of those boxes lying around> I wouldn't mind one.
I noticed that sometimes you used italics when you were thinking and other times you didn't, but apart from that a lovely story.
Write on!
Regards
Cherry-Anne
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