I like this story, I like short stories and think this would make a good one, I don't know much about poetry. I would like to see this finished and see if the girl comes back to the horse.
I love this!!!! Your story leads you to expect something entirely different and the ending is just perfect! I love it. You say this is your first story and I think it is great - I really hope you keep writing and posting your work.
This is a lovely piece - it is sad to think of a child dying - makes me think of the conversation my great grandson must have had with Jesus when they met. I see him sitting on Jesus lap and laughing.
Great writing, Keep Writing
Dianne aka Lazy Writer
I liked your story, it did make me smile. Reminded me of my own traumatic time with natures creatures!. Please read "Stay Out of the Corn Bin" in my port.
I loved this! It is really funny - sometimes there is just too much Christmas music! I love Christmas but not for the usual music and fan fare. Christmas is my Savior's birthday!
My honest reaction "gross!" - this is why I don't usually read horror, but your byline was intriguing and I wanted to see how pancakes played out in your story.
I think you wrote it really well and I did not see any corrections needed.
I just read all four chapters and you have my interest, I will look for more chapters to read. I liked it, I did not see anything that needs correcting or fixing.
Keep Writing
LW
I enjoyed reading your essay. I for one do believe in beings from other planets and solar systems. Do I have any proof? None other than I saw an unidentified object in the sky as a child. I do believe that our government is very capable of hiding its involvement with other beings. I also believe that there are good and bad aliens - just like there are good and bad humans. I wish that I had proof - but I don't. I also believe that there are a lot of people who like to prey on people who believe they have had these experiences. I could go on and on but this is a review not a place for me to write an essay! Sorry about that!
I found this very well written, and very interesting. Only time will tell if there are aliens or not.
This was great! I really enjoyed it. The only correction I see needed is in the 4th paragraph from the bottom in the last sentence - 'of' should be 'or'?
I like the addition of 'Author's note', I believe that it is very possible to have captured an Alien craft.
I enjoyed reading this short story, hope to read more of your writing soon.
This is interesting and I enjoyed reading it. One way to help with writing, I think is to take some writing classes, in whatever genre you are interested in. They are fun and they help. Always pay attention to grammar etc. that part is hard for me, I know when it sounds good but cannot tell you why. Any way keep reading and writing and one day it will happen. We always strive to do our best.
This is such a sad part of American History! We can't change the past - we can only hope to learn from it. I think that you wrote it well, it flows and I followed it. I did not find any errors. You made this part of our history very real - I felt as if I were there.
Keep Writing
LW
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