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80 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Hot Diggity Dog  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
This is a pretty good story and one that anyone who has worked at a convenience store at night can relate to. And to think that good dental hygiene was the fellow's downfall! There are a few minor punctuation problems and a couple of cases of missing letters. The story holds interest and seems very plausible. The reader agrees with John's decision to look for other employment but we enjoy the little jokes he makes about the situation.

The worst thing about the backshift, though John I think you meant "thought John"

It had been little more than an hour before whn the man first entered when?

The man had felt different "Punk kid," he said as he shuffled towards the door, " You haven't heard the last of this!" he shouted as he left.
Period after different and door?
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Review of Never Again  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
I absolutely love the line "Smug as canned ham" and for me, that description brings the poem to life. The poem is full of descriptive terms that build an attitude that the reader can feel -"struts", "slam doors", "bucket over his head so closed-minded". I enjoyed the vigorous and lively run to the bottom of the page.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
I enjoyed this pretty winter's tale about a snowflake and how it reminds us of the many ways and places snow decorates our lives and our world. The snowflake is given free will but submits to the will of his Creator.A beautiful allegory about finding your place in the world and about contentment.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
I wish I could express how wonderful and refreshing it is to run across a really fine poem while clicking through "Read & Review". I doubt I could express it as well as you have expressed the deep yearning for true companionship and love, looking for the one who is looking for you and the longing to meet that one. I have no edits to suggest or word choice to question. The poem does what a poem should do, indeed, what any example of art should do - it impacts the reader on an emotional level. Thank you for the poetic oasis in my review desert.
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Review of Crazy  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a fun little piece of flash fiction that gives a humorous look at an historical figure. I enjoyed the perspective of those around him, viewing him as an eccentric. And they are right in a way, aren't they? I mean, everyone already knew that things fall down. What an idea to spend your life trying to figure out why! Very entertaining. I know what "bat crap" is supposed to be in the last line, but I wonder if it wouldn't work better with some more contemporaneous insult?
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
I liked the change of tone as the thief starts to focus on herself instead of the victim and the worth of her property. The ending is a nice twist. I wonder if she thought to steal some of the apartment dweller's girly items? I like to think she did at least take some mascara and lipstick.
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Review of Maple Road  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
I enjoyed this for a few reasons. I know those paths and dirt roads that wind through woods and wild places with stone boundary lines and tall trees. One can easily understand these places as a refuge. But I also liked that when you returned to find it all developed and changed, you still found a way to make a connection to the trees that remained. This is just a personal preference, but if I had one suggestion, it would be to incorporate some space. If you felt there were any places where a line break and a little white space might naturally occur (such as when thoughts change from one memory to another) I think that might aid me the reader and also put more emphasis on the different phases of the poem.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I loved this hairy horror tale wrapped up in a cautionary tale turned into a crazy grandpa tale. And who could not love a story about guinea pigs? Very well done, well-written, great to read aloud - too bad my kids are grown up now. I was shakin' in my boots, considering getting a carrot for protection from the veggie-munching hordes. Thanks for a fun read.
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Review of Morning Encounter  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
I enjoyed reading this short story. It was almost like a flash fiction with a mystery and a surprise ending. The storyline kept me reading and the situation was one that was both poignant and had a light touch of comedy. The only part that gave me a pause was the part with George Waters coming in the room. I wished it had been a little more clear but that could be my fault.Very readable, a nice, refreshing stop on my reviewing rounds.
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Review of The Beginning  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
You put forth some uplifting thoughts. Fresh starts and resets, sounds like you have a good attitude on life. I hope we can all learn to reset and get a new start daily. Thanks for sharing.
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Review of Puppets  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
Your poem brings up some important issues and shines a light on the way society pressures us to conform to impossible standards. I hope we can all find a way to withstand the pressure and be ourselves. Thanks for sharing and keep writing!
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Review of A Game of Soccer  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
What a shocking story! I found you through "Read a Newbie". Something of a newbie myself but would like to say "welcome". I like the way we don't know that the man dies until the final line, it gives it more punch. Keep writing!
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found this very interesting. The facts were presented in an engaging and entertaining way. I didn't note any problems with spelling or grammar except in the last paragraph where you have one quote mark but no closing quote mark. I think you could even have expanded this article a bit and it would still keep the reader's attention. I enjoyed reading this.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Winter's Breath  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
I have a strange fondness for a villanelle, though I am not, generally speaking, a great fan of strict forms for poetry. This is the first time I have ever seen a villanelle that is comprised mostly of dialogue. I have to admit to liking the idea of perpetual winter,however. This is done cleverly and doesn't feel constrained by the form, but rather, enhanced by it. I enjoyed this very much.
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Review of Sadness  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is good flash fiction. At first, we believe that Alyssa is grieving over being dumped by Tom. Her actions and demeanor are convincing. Then we hear the phone message and all our assumptions are up-ended. I appreciate a flash fiction that surprises me and one that gives me a full and rich vision of the story while still being economical with words. That you did this in fewer than 300 words is impressive.
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Review of Honor  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
Your poem "Honor" reminds us all of the great sacrifices our veterans have made and still make for us today and encourages us to reflect on the great price they've paid to secure our liberty. I enjoyed the sentiments and the serious nature of this poem. Thank you for sharing.
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Review of The Abduction  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
The concept of the story is a fresh one and the story has what I think every flash fiction needs to be successful - a twist. You lead us to believe this will be a story about alien abduction but then pull the rug out from under our assumptions and instead we see a visit to the dentist through the eyes of an unwilling patient. Very amusing. One possible typo- was "I was lying of a table" supposed to be "on a table"?
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Review of God’s Glory  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a lovely poem in which your perceptions of God in nature are phrased in very expressive imagery. In fact, the imagery and language is so strong in stanzas 2,3,4,and 6, that the similes in the first and fifth stanza seem more timid in expression. That is, you say the trees stand tall, reach to heaven and sway. You declare the flowers dance and wave their petals. These are great ways to describe what we observe and to give meaning to their actions. It reminds me of the verse in Isaiah 55- "all the trees of the field shall clap their hands". But the use of the word "like" in the 1st and 5th stanzas weaken your creative imagery. If I had any advice to give at all, it would be to believe more in your imagery and remove the "like". That is, instead of "Like a mighty trumpet in God's ear" say "They are a mighty trumpet..." etc. In the first, just let the breeze be God whispering. I hope you understand my comments. I think your poem is very good and more confidence in your metaphors will make it perfect. I enjoyed reading it very much.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Some of the imagery here is very strong and moving and works well within the overall ocean theme. I won't pretend to understand all of the imagery, but the concept of desired communion and communication is clear and the comparison with the lack of understanding from the sea lion helps to make the point. I enjoyed reading this, thanks for sharing.
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Review of Crash  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
A nice little twisted tale - flash fiction should always have a twist at the end. The first thing you need for a good story is a gripping plot. I didn't understand the meaning of this line: "But sometimes bodies, because I couldn’t imagine people still being trapped in them...". Do you mean people still trapped in the vehicles or the bodies? Anyway, it's good story-telling.
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Review of Shedding  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a perfect Senryu. The last line is perfect in the way it captures the absurdity of human nature and our imperfect choices. I am very impressed as both haiku and senryu are so often done by those who do not truly understand the forms and their purposes.
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Review of The Lion's Roar  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
That's quite a thrilling tale! And I am glad that I will never come face to face with lions, because I am also untrained in how to handle that situation. You tell it well and give plenty of detail. If I had one question it would be the "Lori". Do you mean a truck? If so, should that be "lorry"? Keep writing your adventures, especially if they are all this interesting.
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Review of Summertime  
Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (5.0)
It's almost as good as listening to her sing it.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | (4.0)
"It’s blood, not ink, in every line..." Such a descriptive way to explain the writing process and the writer's relationship to words and his work.
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Review by NordicNoir
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
A heartwarming story of two very different individuals learning to share space and live in harmony. Thanks for sharing this tale from which we could all learn a lesson. Of course, we do see that in nature, one tree is home to many different creatures. Your poem makes is think about the relationships in nature.
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