Classical reality lines make a good piece. I like your search for humor and your meltable characters that romance and run their own worlds. A twosome never loses and this is a wild and sexy grope for a magic in style and candor. You must be coming from a good, stable position to write well like this with mature lines as well that do not fantasize but tell. Yes, the "spoiled little girl" may be the awful end of the ticket for a man like this. I just can't criticize without telling you that I like reading sketchy pieces on WDC. Formidable work that can be turned into something. This speaks. Where is going now? Can it pass colder weather for warmer climate changes?
I just loveyour story about Jade and her kitty Hope. It was written in a very expressive style with alot of heart to it. It moves well and is good descriptively. Without my animal, I know Bill and I wouldn't feel well. I think that so many of us love our animals. It is a good story. I'm glad you wrote it. Best Regards.
With each paragraph this form of using language is meticulously done. I liked your style and your storyline for Christmas. Many have seen heaven, but not all have entered. I liked the type-print. I could read it much easier and it appears to be a very good one for the running in this contest. I wish you luck in that. Do you like Swift and Pope? This is quite the fasionable item.
With such a wise poem, I am at a loss for more knowledge than this in certain ways. I am thoroughly entranzed by its lines, its wanderings, and its essences. I love the lineage you have displayed with commas and runins to the next stanzas. It really works and is nice free verse in itself. The miracle of the "tributary" you might call it with the "Mississippi mud" in mind is iconoclastic the way you word things. It gives credibility to a poem that hails the voices of ancestories and looks at life in a metaphoric way. All of this is extraordinary for a poem. You are speaking to someone special because in the last line you say: your name remains etched on her heart. This is the woman. How intriguing.
Yes, the top version on the item is best. I like your stanzas cutoffs and the deeper lines as they build. Poem to the earthiness and plight of floods, it is a thorough and masterful item.
With as much is said for grand prayers, earth prayers that settle into the dust can be just as astounding. I think you have a very good poem here. It matches words for meaning and speaks to the earth well. I think I understand its positivity and its "journey". The poem gathers motivity and lends us the source of its psychology as "no barriers" with a title.
I wondered slightly why there was indentation with the 6th and 7th stanza that doubled. Perhaps, a reason for that. Okay. You included the title in the last stanza and a good explanation that is upturned and in another way romantic "when we are apart" so that adds to the glamour and not just earthiness of the poem.
Overall, it is a whispering charismatic poem that is well-done.
STORYLINE: What a wonderful and honest moment for those who know Sassy. Someone like this is very special and deserves the best of attention. Many of these children do not have a place to live that is good for them. Sassy as a teenager was a good part of the story and signifying something real for her. Nicely done. A great little piece with good dimensions to it.
GRAMMAR/SPELLING: I didn't see any mistakes.
OVERALL: Heart-warming poignant piece that examines adoption with kindness and thoughtfulness.
STORLYLINE: I nice essay-type articulate and humorous way of ironic storytelling, this piece is short and sweet. Loved it. A very cool item.
GRAMMAR AND WORD PHRASES: I liked your placing the knowledge of terms we might not know firsthand and are just understanding. Your courtesy to spelling was good by me.
OVERALL: Easy and understandable to read. Good jog of memory.
STORYLINE: Interesting short. Moves fast like flash fiction. Liked your setting and the investigational motive in it. Liked your intrigue and enjoyed a touch of mystery with it.
GRAMMAR: Couldn't find any mistakes.
OVERALLL: You have always been good in the Mystery Newsletter and you always do a great job of thoroughness. I like detail in mystery writing, and a character who will keep me guessing and you fulfill that. Knowing even that you are probably clairvoyant. You draw conclusions that are intricate and yet basic and find answers too.
I can't say enough of about reading Public Reviews. I learn so much by doing so. If anything, reviewing has been my favorite sport at Writing.com. Perhaps, even more than displaying my own work even though I think it is a godsend to file items which portray the real you. What is so often said, is : you can always review with reviewing and not learn how or else you can try to improve and put your mind to it.
I think this item is priceless. What else is good time but reviewing at writing.com? The points you made are certainly those that commend reviewing which is what I think can only be good thing. I myself have struggled over some lower rate/reviews at times but have not encountered throrough harrassment and have been given honest, great reviews most of the time. It makes me feel good and I think it makes others, if your review stimulates them and even gives them a possibility of revising their item.
Little or none criticism is necessary for this item, of course. We can click at our fingertips and be useful at writing.com or else we can manage to get confused somewhere else.
Love this. It encourages intelligence and deeper thought toward readers.
With each line, the images flash out at me as I took the title in quite quickly. There is momentum to it. There is meaning. Favorite line: Steaming tarmac and whistling grass. Without the free verse that rises above, good poetry like this isn't talked enough about. You repeated an image in a careful way and I liked the motion in the poem. Good with all lines except perhaps the second and third that might be split differently; however, if the poem is true to form they are surely okay.
Encouraging philosophy to me begins to take shape, and I lose myself in the tar in the tracks. Great poem.
Great little poem Sherri. I like your lines and the scary moment you come up with. After all, Halloween is meant to tell you such things and gives us reign upon ghosts and goblins which can be evil. Your form is excellent to a fault and you have come up with a nice warning. Your style, it shows.
I love info items on WDC. Much of this is a very good basic description for Halloween and its history. It is well-stated and gives us a nice little story to think on this season. One mistake on the third line up from the last,: "trick or trating" should be "trick or treating". Enjoyable/
Gee, maybe it's better that she says goodbye to Jack. To harrass him beyond the grave wouldn't be the best of decisions. If she loved him, she should leave him. Nothing more than giving him the pleasure of his wishes. Good dialogue form. A natural at a very fasciniating subject. I liked this.
Oh, a swell poem for Halloween with your country-style to it. Words that knock on dark-lit halloween doors and find their way into the terror of the season. Good end to a scary seasonal occurrance with us all enjoying the treats for the kids. It sails with timely lines and keeps you on your toes. Excellently done for us.
I just loved this religiously based poem with its deep reverence and honest outlook at where to pray. I am completely in awe of some such a place and have been to UK several times where I visited reverent spaces that somehow escape me as of their names. I investigated Coventry Gardens and was told of the WWII destruction of it and visited castles as well. But somehow where I bought up a pamphlets of a religious nature were by far the most sacred and fascinating places.
Inner meaning as well I detect, with the last of "We bid farewell to England's Nazareth". Well taken. That wonderful place in time.
Great little contest winner. I like your choices and your fantasy like story. It is all too unreal! With each of your paragraphs the groups mentioned added to the spice of your own story. NAI is happy I'm sure to get such contest participation. No mistakes in grammar/spelling. Best Regards from another NAI member.
: Excellent flash-fiction. Which is something I just adore. I have read alot of flash-fiction on WDC and can't get enough of it. Your portrayal of a bus ride into the night with a vampire was descriptively positive and detailed. With this kind of scene at this time of year, I'm sure you will get alot of positive remarks. I didn't see any mistakes. A few commas might have been avoided with a rewrite but I don't think this was necessary. Your command of English was just fine. Very believable. Horror/Fantasy with a good reality bite.
: What can say about such an excellent opinion poem? You have touched on a real subject here that needs to be addressed by the public. I hadn't known about this even though I had spent alot of time in Florida. Good mag poem for you, somewhere.
: GRAMMAR/SPELLING: words of nature and biology are here as we contemplate your dilemma on snakes. No mistakes appeared to me.
: OVERALL: As in all your poems, there is usually something based on reality and like this particular one a subject one might find informative in the public eye.
: STYLE: Such images that describe clouds here are really very penetrating and offer an excellent range of ideas for us to think on. The style in its special form was very well done and the words seem to flow so well. I liked your basis for the poem and the light, enjoyablr style of words was easy and eye-catching.
: GRAMMAR/SPELLING: Saw no mistakes. The form used was in perfect condition.
: OVERALL: A joy to read. A good poem leaves you with something special. Postive poems like this give us a warm and happy feeling intead of morose and ugly.
Years back, I read a full novel of yours and was totally amazed at your great genius. Likewise this piece is satisfying and eeks for a reader to come back. I was also amazed at its embodiement of sound meaning and I had fun dreaming with the characters and marveling at the phrases. I found it surreal and fantastical. Delicious words like this make a piece like this like chocolate. You are a mystery here, I think. And a magical entity to which you introduce your work. Thank you for adding this to WDC. No grammar/spelling mistakes appeared to me.
Excellent message for those of us who like the Spiritual Newsletter where it was featured recently. Success and failure and therein the meaning of them are great subjects to contemplate and write about. I liked the autobiographical kind of style with your choice of good solid words of spiritual reward for us. A good, honest poem. Best Regards.
How marvelous and deep this simple poem is. I just loved it. It's strengths, its faith, its warning. Red sails in the sunset come to mind, for me. I love that train of thought and this is no exception to a clear sailing moment of awareness. That last line: How mind-boggling and exceptional. I had read through the Spiritual newsletter and you were a featured choice, and honestly so. Best Regards.
Excellently smooth of you to begin and end with a great friend who is blind. I have a blind friend who is very wonderful too. This poem speaks of an elegance that sounds just like a song. Good choice of ideas. Best Regards.
Extra special words of endearment that consider love and its consequences. I liked it alot and found no mistakes. The form you used is equally as challenging as any other and you have grasped it well. The words actually seemed quixotic to me and alluring. The excitement of the poem is almost a reality. Excellent writing. Best Regards.
FORMULA FOR THIS ITEM: I love a recipe! All the recipes I ran into on WDC were great. This one is no exception. I love pumpkin bread and have made this as well as pumpkin cookies and pumpkin pie. Your storyline for the recipe was highly original, the setting, and the viewpoint.
{:e:question} GRAMMAR/SPELLING: NO mistakes.
OVERALL: Bravo! A reality item with sugar and spice. Very popular. Great to read.
Feather Duster
vicki
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STORYLINE: What a wonderful and honest moment for those who know Sassy. Someone like this is very special and deserves the best of attention. Many of these children do not have a place to live that is good for them. Sassy as a teenager was a good part of the story and signifying something real for her. Nicely done. A great little piece with good dimensions to it.
: GRAMMAR/SPELLING: words of nature and biology are here as we contemplate your dilemma on snakes. No mistakes appeared to me.
