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Not interesting at all. Just like me. |
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In a text-based world, I'm beautiful. My favorite things in life: *cocoa *hugs *banana paraphernalia (chips, smoothies, ice cream....) *knowing that I am understood. *good pens/pencils *writing down my thoughts *serving *conversations of the deep sort. *spending time with those that I love. *a cleansing bunch of noise once in a while *quiet the rest of the time *blogging my lil heart out *understanding *noticing the little things that generally don't matter. *being just a little bit different *pretending to be a poser "You must do the things you think you cannot do." -Eleanor Roosevelt. This is straightforwardly me. |
 This is dumb. I drew away on purpose, and now I'm being reeled back in... One of these days I'll think before I type... In the meantime, I played Apples to Apples again last night, until about 4:30. Then I wen to bed. I woke up at 10:30 to finish a paper, which amazingly, I haven't done shit with. I'll just hand in my last copy, the prof doesn't really look at them anyway. She just randomly writes, "Good details!" in bad hand writing on it. She finally drank her pain away a little at a time, but she never could get drunk enough to get him off her mind... I got a care package from a lady at church. I'm really not sure who it was, because I can't read her signature, but oh well. It had a cool little calendar in it, and about $15 of gift certificates, plus cool little doo-dads that they send to us 'kids'.  All in all, a nice experience. I've recently joined the creative team for my local Christian fellowship group. I realized something today; I'm brilliant. And even if I'm not, the things that I have to say are made awesome by other members of the group. I've got the seeds, but little talent to institute them. Luckily, there are people with that talent. It's awesome. Oic, I have an hour and a half to be dressed, dry and have a filled out application... I'm none of the above at the moment... 3,6,9 damn she fine I wonda if she can sock it to me one mo time Get low, Get low, Get Low, Get Low I'm a dirty little bitch, I know it. I've got the 'clean' version, though. I looked up the lyrics online (mostly because I could only pick out 6 words from the whole song), and there's a lot of swear words missing from my version.  I stole it from a clean friend, though, so that would be why.  |
I've got the 'I don't belong anywhere' bug.  I don't like the feeling. And I'm being whiney again. As long as I'm being whiney, though, I'm gonna whine about what's on my mind lately: Family. It seems like almost everyone on campus has a mom and a dad who they are still in contact with. Whenever they want or need to, they can call up and chat with Pop or Mama. I don't know, I've just been really sensitive about the whole thing, lately. From dumb things to Hannah's dad calling her and asking her if her boyfriend knows that he has a shotgun, to more important things, like Gwen's dad taking care of her in any circumstance. I know, I know. At least I've met my dad. I even lived with him for a while. He even gave me a pet name, once. I'm lucky, and I know it. I mean it. But I can't help but wish for better times. I've learned that nobody will ever be what you want them to be. With Mom, it's especially true. This is her first time living alone in 54 years of life. She's incredibly needy, she calls Jordan twice a week for help with something, and Lank still lives at home, so he can help her with the little things. (He doesn't count as 'living with someone' because he's the baby and acts like it sometimes... He's not her caretaker, basically) I can't help but wish that Dad would pop by one day bathed, drug-free, healthy, that he'd have a job, that he'd be in a good mood (so as not to yell at me or insult me), and that he'd just say, "Hey hun, let's go have some quality father-daughter time." Unfortunately, due to his history, if that happened, I wouldn't be able to trust him. I'm not even going to mess with that one. So, yeah. I'm going to go and have a hectic day. I've got freetime from 6-9:30..... Then it's to work.  Oh, before I go, I'd like to share the handle that I can't use but would love to: In Knee Brie Ate Ted Definitely not E  Will I see you in Part II? Can we pick up where we left off when I lost you? And we fall in love again. Change the way the story ends. We bring back me and you in Part II. -In Knee Brie Ate Ted |
| I'm tempted to write a very vague entry.... Let's just say that I'm a very blessed being. I just had a rootbeer float... yummy... The last rootbeer float I had was lovingly made by a very sweet person. I might have chili on saturday. I certainly hope that I will be having it... I'll be put out, otherwise. Spring break in a few days. I'm going home with Hannah, if I haven't mentioned it. We'll have a good time. As far as WDC goes, I've been around a little bit more lately, I feel 'more in contact'. I'm not as out of the loop... I have a horrible time keeping up with everyone's journal, though... Keep writing everyone. Any writing I've been doing has been for class, but it hasn't been half-bad. Well, the essays have sucked ASSSSSSSSS, but the poetry has been really good. If you run across anything in my port labelled 'don't read', don't bother reading it. I don't care. It sucks, I know it. Chances are that I've already turned whatever it is in. A lot is/was due this week. I'm sorry if I haven't been around much or you've missed me... I don't think that you'd actually miss me, though. I've been around 'enough' for now. I finally beat the first Sims on PS2. I just got it at Christmas, and us college kids don't have time for things like making sure our Sims went potty. (I sometimes don't have the time to make sure that I went potty...) I can hardly keep my eyes open, and I have to get up early tomorrow. Hasta la pasta! -knee |
| ....but I really thought that he'd go for 'sunsets'. If I recall correctly, watching the sun set is one of his favorite things to do... Games are so much fun! My favorite games right now are: Apples to Apples, Balderdash, Scattergories and Taboo. I'm not sure if it's spending time with people, or if it's the game itself, but these are great! And the better you know the other players, the more likely you are to do well. (IE: when Lank and I play Taboo on the same team, we fucking beat the shit out of everyone. We think a lot alike.) Knowing people can be fun too. Annabelle was visiting a while ago, and she and Hannah were talking. They were having a misunderstanding, and they didn't know it. I could see it happening, though, so I just explained to each individual what the other was trying to say. I was a translator! (and I didn't have to understand el sujectivo pluscuamperfecto for that!!!!!) Speaking of Spanish... Ay yi yi! I finally understand the perfect, but I've lost all grasp on the imperfect subjunctive... Oic. Even the subjunctive is slipping... And I've got a week off from Spanish coming up here... I'll be lost all over again. Grrrrr.  Anyway, I'm heading to bed in about 2 seconds. Night all! |
| Midterms. Midterms. Midterms.... I need to stop doing nothing. I need to get up, go to the computer lab over in Mac. I need to print stuff out, read stuff, type stuff up, and print more stuff. Then I will go to visit Hannah, who I haven't seen this weekend (she's my best friend, I like to see her once in a while). And while there, I will finish my Spanish for tomorrow. I need to chill out and buckle down. That doesn't make too much sense, but here's the deal: because I'm nervous about the 6 million things I have due next week, I'm freaking out and am unable to begin anywhere. I was sick last night, but I'm much better now. That's what I get for eating onion rings at midnight. It had almost been a year since I had thrown up, too. *superKnee never gets sick* And I'm in love with chat beta.  So come chat with me, eh? |
| Hehehe. He had me covered. Jimmy, the guy from the last entry, had called Patrick. He didn't have plans. I had my days mixed up. I might be the only one NOT receiving a write-up. Sometimes I'm so well behaved.  So I've got tonight off, and my friends should be arriving any second for a Ninja Turtle bash. I've never seen the movies, so it's gonna be nifty. Phew. I'm not fired. (I tend to think that I'll be fired a lot... I still haven't been fired. ) |
| I'm angry with a guy at work. The story goes like this: Jimmy is pushy. He insists on getting 3-4 shifts a week. He's got seniority over 3 people, so he'll push them off the schedule to get his days. And then, he drops at least one shift every week. It's usually to me, because I have no life and I could use the money. On Monday he called me. Told me he was 'sick'. He'd been in jail over the weekend (poor him!  ). He had homework to do. He was sick!I needed the $$, but there was a campus praise rally that I really wanted to go to. I had friends to go with, etc. I told him that I'd work for him if no one else would. He said that he'd call Jason and ask him, but that he'd already called everyone else. So I waited for him to call Jason. I waited until 8PM, when the rally had already started. He called me and said that Jason hadn't called him back. I never got the official call, but I went to work anyway. I knew his ploy. It had worked. Again. So he owed me. And he knew it. He promised that he'd work this weekend for me if I wanted him too. So on Tuesday when I called and asked him to work for me on Friday, he said that he was already working, but he'd find someone to work for me. I was pleased. I had wanted to meet with my small group for a movie night. It was set up that they'd all come over to my apartment on Friday night. So I didn't sweat it. Come Thursday night, we were really busy. I kept thinking to myself, "Yay! I get tomorrow off!" I've worked every Friday except 2 since September. Only one other person is willing to take so many weekends, and that's Lindsey, who works pretty much every day anyway. So last night, Thursday night, I glanced at the schedule to find out who Jimmy found to fill in for me. The schedule had Darnell crossed off, and the schedule only said that Jimmy and I were working.... That in itself was a problem. Then Lindsey spoke up and said that Jimmy had gone home for the weekend. Leaving me as the only person on the schedule. It takes at the utmost, very least, 2 people to run LateNite. 2 people who run their asses off to try to make the customers happy. 2 people who at the end of the night are ready to fall down dead. Who've been harrased by customers all night. I hate nights with 2 people. I've worked about 10 of them in my two years, and they really, really, suck. One person is impossible. I'm going to talk with the manager of the building today to see what should be done. I look bad, because I can't come in, and I didn't have a backup. I should've covered my own ass. I should've been more responsible. I know better than to trust Jimmy. He's done this sort of thing before. I just didn't care as much before. I don't know who I'm more angry with; myself, or Jimmy. And I shouldn't be so pissed at the asshole that is Jimmy. I should have the 'turn the other cheek' mentality, I should be mature, forgiving... Forgiveness has always been a struggle with me. If you knowlingly hurt me, it stings. Few things sting for me. It takes a lot to hurt me. Physically, you have to take me by surprise to hurt me. Emotionally: You have to not care, or seem like you don't care. So I'll wallow in self-pity until my 2PM class, then I'll run over and talk to the manager. I've called every person who's ever worked latenite. Every person who could possibly fill in, no matter what, I've called them. Jenise, Mary, Nick, and Jimmy are out of town. Darnell, Lindsey, Ted, Patrick and Jason all have plans. I have plans too. Why am I the one that's going to be screwed over????? |
An interesting blog entry usually contains: AngstAngerComedyOrganizationCreativitySomething of interest to state.I have none of these things today... I'm incredibly at peace today. I should be stressed, worried, over-worked, in need of a break... But I'm fine. All who seek will eventually find. |
| I have my hair in pigtails today. I'm pretty sure that you're not supposed to wear pigtails after age 15, but I don't care. I'm a pig tailly mood today. "It's getting late, Sunday Jack!" I had a funny dream last night. There was this person, and they had this 'high tech' raft, and they were out swimming on it. They needed rope, and they went to Jake's to get rope... And the person's mouth looked like a pair of goggles. Jake's house had mushrooms all over in the yard, on purpose. Well, the person got the rope and went out to his/her raft and tried to lasso his/her mother, who was drowning. Oh, and Grandpa was finding worms to put in the yard, because they'd all been taken out by the government... I never did find out if whoever's mother lived... I'm in a good mood today, without anything to complain about, really. At least, not from me, personally, anyway. I'm just in a jolly, cheery mood. I love these. So yeah, I'm gonna go get ready for class. |
| No, I'm not going to start blogging more than I change my handle, I promise. (Did ya notice that this handle has been up since Saturday, and I was online a lot on Sunday and today. I've realized that there are many people who I thought I knew pretty well, but it's turning out not to be true. For instance, I'm vaguely annoyed with my younger brother. He's vaguely avoiding my phone calls. We talked on Friday for a while, which was fun. I said, "I'll probably call this weekend," and he just grunted. I called only twice, but I missed him both times. On the other end of the spectrum, Leslie, a girl at work, whom I wasn't fond of last year, has grown close to my heart this year. (too many commas, I know. Sorry, I'm working on lengthening my sentences in Spanish, and it's spilling over into my English) Oh, and sadness. My adolescence is coming to an end soon. I've got 4 more months of being a teen.... I've only just gotten used to being an adult, and yet my youngest brother is an adult now too. Why is it that I never want to move on? I say that I like change, that it's interesting, but I still find myself clinging to the past, both good and bad. I don't want to let go. I do mass deletions. I clear myself of old blogs. I click buttons that send the last copy of mediocre poetry into oblivion. Optical data... So easy to destroy. (Got a magnet, anyone?) My hair is fun today. I let it dry itself, wore it down, and didn't put a thing into it. It's windy. My hair is very nonconformist today. And I'm pretending that I care right now. (I've given up the whole "don't be like everyone else" speech. I could care less. Be like everyone else. I'm too lazy to keep up, though) I don't like it when people say things that aren't true for effect. Harmless example: "Since the beginning of time, man has gone to school." Other example: "[that group] hasn't been active in months." I said something 3 or 4 week ago that got 2 responses. A month prior to that, I said something that got no responses. I gave up on the group, because it wasn't helping me. My fault, I wasn't being accepting of new members. If I didn't know the person, I wasn't responding, so they didn't respond to me. My fault. Why am I writing today? I'm so talkative again... |
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