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 |  I write, therefore I am |
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I write, therefore I am. I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough. PLUGS:
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| I am not what you would call the religious type. I do not claim to be a representative of Christian, Jewish, Baptist, Budist, or any other belief. I am not a big fan of organized religion. I would rather read the BIBLE on my own and form my own judgements from my own studies than to have someone tell me what me interpretations of verses should be. That is neither here not there. This is not a question of my beliefs, but it is a question. From time to time do you feel that you are being led by someone other than yourself? Do you feel that you are led to someone so that you can be there in their time of need? Recently I have discovered someone on this site who was in need of an upgrade, now they did not ask for an upgrade or even mention that their upgrade was almost expired. I just happened to run across them and spark up a quick friendship, that led to my discovery of the upgrade expiring. Now that might just seem to be a coincidence to you and perhaps it is. Just recently when I renewed my own upgrade I purchased 200k GPs to use for my contest. If I did not make the purchase of these GPs I would not have had the extra ammount needed to provide an upgrade assistance. Still it could be a coincidence or we could be led by someone other than ourselves if we just stop resisting and go where the wind takes us. Just a thought. quote; I don't know if we each have a destiny, or if we're all just floatin' around accidental-like on a breeze. But I, I think maybe it's both. Forrest Gump (Tom Hanks) - Forrest Gump |
| In just a little ol month my little BLOG that could has gone from 1300 views to 2000. I average between 25 and 30 views aday abd eachday I keep hoping for someone to leave a comment starting with one phrase, but I never get the phrase. I think it would make me laugh to no end, but that is just the Pop Culture Junkie Geek in me. And the winning phrase would be, Long time reader first time commenter. See not funny to you but it would leave me in stitches. Excuse me there is someone at the door. Ok that was close, it was the men with the little white coat. I told them they had the wrong house. They look confused but they left. That should hold them for a bit. I was shocked to see my name pop up in a few BLOGs today. Of course I was highly amused by ccstring tirade in the WDC Courtroom. Funny funny stuff. Well I am really tired so I think I will away to sleep, but before I go I have one more thing to say. Recently someone mentioned my habit of leaving each post with a movie qoute. That's right annoying to some, amusing yo others, and manditory for me but I am such a lover of movies that quotes are always running through my head so I have to leave some behind eachday. So why don't all of you who visit here today, even those that just view and go about your business, just drop me a little comment with your own favorite movie quotes. Don't worry if you get the quote wrong I won't tell no one. hehe. Good night everyone. And if you read a new BLOG without a rating why not drop them a  for showing up in BLOGville. Make them feel welcome.and without further ado....quote; Way out west there was this fella I wanna tell ya about. Goes by the name of Jeff Lebowski. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. See, this Lebowski, he called himself "The Dude". Now, "Dude" - there's a name no man would self-apply where I come from. But then there was a lot about the Dude that didn't make a whole lot of sense. The Stranger (Sam Elliot) - The Big Lewbowski |
| It's three am and outside it's not raining. That is a paraphrased line from a Matchbox 20 song. For some reason it always pops in my head when I want to sit and write something serious. I do not know why, it makes no sense. The great land of BLOGville has increased by leaps and bounds lately and I am glad to see more people showing up here. It is getting hard to keep up with all the BLOGs though. Just remember I may not leave comments behind but I do read all of you religiously. I even have a few new people to add to the left there, I just haven't gotten around to it. I do find it funny that people here are always complementing me on my writing and my "talent". I don't think I am all that talented. To me most of my writing comes across as weak and uneducated. I am told that I am deserving of my yeller briefcase and I thank them, but in my mind I am waiting to log on one day and find an email saying that it was a mistake. I write everything off of the top of my head, rarely do I use outlines or any of the other "professional" writing techniques. I prefer to have my characters tell me where they want to go, not outline where they have to go. Although I do point them in a genereal direction. Sometimes I wonder if I will ever be published. Will I ever finish a novel. Oh I have three started and ideas for at least three more, but will I stop procrastinating and finish any of them? Or will I be like that crazy uncle who passes away and his closet is found to be filled with half completed "Great American" novels? Ideas are always running through my mind. I am constantly recieving little snippets of ideas, I just need to sit and write them out. I think I need a strong woman in a leather outfit with a whip at my back to make me write. I want to write I love to write I live to write, yet I am scared to write. In the back of my mind I still here my ex-girlfriend telling me that I have no talent, that nothing I write makes sense, that I am stupid, and a waste of life. I mean for the love of drying paint it has been over nine years since we parted and still I feel her breathing down my neck, chastising me for wasting time by writing. I sit and try to write and my mind is more educated than my fingers, or something. I feel like a little boy sitting in the classroom while everyone else is out playing at reccess. I know that does not make any sense to you. When I write I feel like an uneducated buffoon. When I review I feel like the banjo player on the porch in Deliverance. I read someone elses stuff and I am like derderderdaaaahder, I don't know what to say. I don't know the mechanics of writing, what I do I do naturally. An english teacher in school told me that he didn't understand how I couldn't tell you what a past participle was, but I knew instinctively where to end s paragraph in a story. I told him I was just an idiot savant. I think that I have rambled on enough for one night. I hope everyone had a nice night. quote; If I had one day when I didn't have to be all confused and I didn't have to feel that I was ashamed of everything. If I felt that I belonged someplace. You know? Jim Stark (James Dean) - Rebel Without A Cause |
| Sometimes I sit and wonder what makes changes in us from one day to the next? Recently the depression of the last month or so has lifted and I find myself content and at peace. What brought about this change? I have excepted nothing different in my life. The "Lady D" decided that she wasn't ready for a relationship again after all and I smile and excepted it as a given. I did not get upset I just bowed and faded away into the night. So what has happened? Did someone spray me with "MatureGro" while I slept? What is so different now? Do I still feel for her? Of course, I do not think that will ever change, I just excepted what she had to say and decided to move on. I look around and I see myself surrounded by people I feel truly care, both in my "real" life and here at WDC. I am surrounded by people who care and who want to see me succeed. Is that all the love I need at the moment? Is that enough to bring on this content feeling I now have? I don't know. As you can see by my new title, I am a Solitary Man. Do I like being that way? Of course not. I miss having someone special to share myself with and be shared with. I miss holding hands and the little laughs at private jokes. I was told recently if you look for love you will never find it. It;s when you least expect it that it will take a hold of you and refuse to let go. Still there are times I want to scream out when will I be loved. Then I look around and my new "family" and I think my time is now. I am loved and I try to love in return. Still I am a Solitary Man and long for someone else. Kind of contradictory aint it. Well hey, that is me. If any of you have the chance stop by and visit "Invalid Item"  she really has herself put together.Oh, well I think I are tired and am heading off to bed. quote; You tell God the Father it was a kindness you done. I know you hurtin' and worryin', I can feel it on you, but you oughta quit on it now. Because I want it over and done. I do. I'm tired, boss. Tired of bein' on the road, lonely as a sparrow in the rain. Tired of not ever having me a buddy to be with, or tell me where we's coming from or going to, or why. Mostly I'm tired of people being ugly to each other. I'm tired of all the pain I feel and hear in the world everyday. There's too much of it. It's like pieces of glass in my head all the time. Can you understand? John Coffey (Micheal Clark Duncan) - The Green Mile |
| I have descovered a new writer's desease to go along with Writer's Block. It is Writer's Chaos Theory. I have been trying to write for the last few days and have found myself unable to. There are so many ideas fighting for control in my mind that when I try to write they begin to bleed into eachother. I have managed to write "Invalid Item" which won first place in lyrical interpretation contest. Other than that nothing. I think this is more frustrating then writer's block. I try to sit down and write something and it comes out in a jumble. It's agrivating because I never edit or rewrite anything before I post it to the site and I ussually don't edit or rewrite after that either. I think with all the items in my port I have edited one piece to fit contest rules and have rewritten one Chapter, other than that it is all off the top of my head. So its frustravating and agratating. Hey look I made two new words. I rock. lol. Finally, the entertainment world was saddened yesterday at the loss of Pat Morita who passed away on Thanksgiving day of natural causes. Pat Morita was known by most people as Arnold on Happy Days, and he was best known for his turn as Mr. Miyagi in the Karate Kids movies. Pat Morita did not begin stand up until he was well into his thirties and it is a little known fact that he was sent to internment camps in California during World War II. He will be missed. Pat Morita 1932-2005 quote; Man walk on road. Walk left side, safe. Walk right side, safe. Walk down middle, sooner or later, get squished just like grape. Same here. You karate do "yes," or karate do "no." You karate do "guess so," just like grape. Understand? Mr. Miyagi (Pat Morita) - Karate Kid |
| Before I get to the menu of the day, I would like to make a statement. IF we can just get Tor, CC and PlannerDan out of the food for a second. First I want to say that for the first time in so long I have actually been thankful this year. I am thankful for my new friends here on WDC. I am thankful for the family that I have now found self apart of by moving renting a room from a friend of mine. There was thirteen of us here for dinner today and although I was not related to any of the people present, I felt as if I was surrounded by family. There is so much more I want to say, but I cannot find the words. Of course I offer up a prayer for all of those we lost this year; family, friends, WDCers, and even family pets. I know people who do not see the point in BLOGging, and I feel sad for what they miss. By BLOGging on WDC I have been introduced to more and more people and by reading of their trials and tribulations I feel that I know them more than I know the people I see day in and day out. In our BLOGs we can laugh, cry, mourn, and smile with eachother. We can offer support and strength to those who need it. Oh well, on to the menu; Deep Fried Turkey Venison Roast Pork Loin, stuffed with cranberries, apricots, pineapple and walnuts with a reduction sauce Spiral Ham BBQ smokies sausage Baked Macaroni and Cheese Mashed Potatos String Bean Caserole Deviled Eggs Sausage Stuffing stuffed Mushrooms Brocolli and Cheese Soup Candied Yams Beets Salad Pumplin pie Boston Creme pie Pecan Pie Macodamia Nut Cookies SUgar Cookies Chocolate Chip Cookie Various Wines Cherry Cider Iced Tea Sodas I think I have quoted enough for tonight. I hope you all had a Happy Thanksgiving. Larry |
| Well this is my first thanksgiving here at WDC and in BLOGville. I want to wish all of the people I have created relationships with here a Happy and Safe Thanksgiving. I just ask that tomorrow before you eat your huge meals, that you give a moment of silence for those that you have lost this year. It has been a really sad year for me with deaths in the family and friends passing. I am thankful for all the friends I have found here, my parents health, the stregnth that I have found to stand taller, that I have finally after years of not being able to, I have started writing again, I am thankful for my yellow briefcase, I am thankful for the month I had with the Lady Dee. I am sure that there are other things that I am thankful for, but I can't really think of anything right now. an this year has flown by, it seems like just yesterday it was January, now it is almost Christmas and New Years again. Well I have to go start cooking for tomorrow, we are having something like fifteen people over for dinner tomorrow, so we are trying to get a head start. You will all be in my thoughts tomorrow. And CC we aint having no duck for dinner. Just for you. quote; In the year 1621, the Pilgrims held their first Thanksgiving feast. They invited the great Indian chief Massasoit, who brought ninety of his brave Indians and a great abundance of food. Governor William Bradford and Captain Miles Standish were honored guests. Elder William Brewster, who was a minister, said a prayer that went something like this: 'We thank God for our homes and our food and our safety in a new land. We thank God for the opportunity to create a new world for freedom and justice." LInus (Stephen Shea) - A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving |
| That is how long it can take for you to be gone. In a moments notice. You can be here one moment and gone the next. Love like your life depends on it and live like there is no tomorrow. There just may not be. It is amazing to me how wide spread and loved a person can be on this website, when a vast majority of us have never met face to face. Just by being here and reviewing a few items, talking to a few people, entering a few contests, hosting a few, and joining a few groups you can enter into others lives and become a guiding influence. Now I am not claiming this for myself, but I am offering it freely to VerySara   because that is what she was to so many on this site, a guiding influence.If you look around BLOGville you will see a great many people with some sort of tribute to VerySara as part of their name. That just stands as a testament to her character and the love she gave to others. She was a wonderful person and one of the first people to befriend me on this website.I remember one of our first conversations after we had each reviewed one of the others items. Somehow during the conversation she thought that I lived in Greenland and it took me telling her repeatedly that I live in Virginia before she finally understood what I was getting at. It may not seem much to some of you, but that little story makes me laugh when I think about it. That is until I stop for a few moments of bitter tears at her passing. I know it is selfish of me, but I wish she was still here brightening someone's day if not mine. IF you would like to list a little tribute to VerySara 's passing here is a link where you can say something that will be read by her family.
I am also hosting a poetry contest in here name;
Maybe God needed a poet. Goodbye, lovely Sara. We hardly knew ye. quote; You shall no longer take things at second or third hand, not look through the eyes of the dead, nor feed on the spectres in books. You shall not look through my eyes either, nor take things from me, you shall listen to all sides and filter them from yourself. Simon Wilder (Joe Pesci) - With Honors |
| VerySara has passed away. I do not know the events that led up to what happened or even what happened. I just learned in Scroll that she had passed away. She was a wonderful addition to this site and one of the first people to give me a review on one of my pieces and help me improve on it. She will be missed. My prayers are with her family and friends. I hope she has found peace now.
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| It's funny, now that October has past and the cloud of that month has lifted from my soul I find that I have nothing to write about. I planned on writing an entry about not being able to go home again, but being able to look back at your past. Alas, I cannot find the words to do such an entry the justice it would asuredly deserve. I have come through October feeling, not really refreshed, but washed clean and content. I am happy with me writing. I am happy with the people in my life, physical and wdcical (I made up a word, sweet) I feel content with my surroundings. They say that you cannot go home again, but I don't believe that is true. I think we go home a little everyday. Something will happen that will trigger a memory of the past and in that instant you will be back home. It's just the way the mind works. I am a product of pop culture, I cannot help being that way. I was raised listening to Johnny Cash, Hank Williams, Tommy James and the Shondells, SImon and Garfunkel, Four Seasons, Kiss, BeeGees, AC/DC, and the Platters. The earliest books I remember reading were Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew, Narnia, Dracula, Frankenstien, Portait of Dorian Gray, Jeckyl and Hyde, Jaws, and the biographies of ALesander Graham Bell and Theadore Rosevelt. Of course the TV shows ranged from Andy Griffith, Ghost and Mrs. Muir, The Micky Mouse show's Hardy Boys, Andy Hardy movies, Ma and Pa Kettle Movies, Three Stooges, Abbott and Costello, Saturday Night Live, M*A*S*H, Newhart and more than I could possibly name. When ever I hear of such things now I look back on the past and I am back home again and it is ok. I look back on things and smile. I cannot pull out any particular thing that makes me happy, but I am accepting. Before I go for the night I must say to everyone, especially the romance happy wimmins out there, it would seem that the Lady Dee and I are not to be. She is scared and not ready for a relationship so soon after dealing with her husband. She is pulling away because she is afraid that she will fall for me more than she already has and not be ready to deal with it. She said she was sorry, she just could not do it right now. Do I admire her honesty or scoff at her weakness? Is it weakness? I told her that I understand what she is saying and I meant it. I do, I don't like it but I understand. I told her not to contact me again, because I can't handle the strain of loving her and her being afraid to love me in return. She didn't understand what I was saying, but I meant it. I do, I don't like it, but I understand. So hear I am, just as I was at the start of October, alone and reminiscent of the past. Yet, I feel stronger than I have in years. I stand tall before the world with an army of friends at my back and a seven nation army couldn't hold me back. Peace. quote; The great thing about M.J. is when you look in her eyes, and she's looking back in yours, everything feels not quite normal, because you feel stronger, and weaker at the same time. You feel excited, and at the same time, terrified. The truth is you don't know what you feel, except you know what kind of man you want to be. It's as if you've reached the unreachable, and you weren't ready for it. Peter Parker (Toby McGuire) - Spider-Man |
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