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Review of Where is the Time  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy 2020 ri! *Confettir*
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Clock*The title asks a question that I think many ask. LOL It does seem to go fast. It drew me to your poem even more when I read your tagline with its interesting notion.

*Clock*The first lines appealed to me as they mimic a clock ticking to me. Well chosen words create an effective soundscape as I read aloud. The language has a tight weave and has a scientific vibe to me. Perfect.

*Clock*The title question is in the second verse and I was intrigued with the idea that even when time has passed, we still linger there in the past. I wasn't sure about the last line meaning "against desire". Desire for what? Might just be me. *Think*

*Clock2* I was impressed with the 5 line stanzas, which are well balanced in rhythm, beat and rhyme scheme. It reminded me of a quatrain and the extra line and your neat rhyme scheme made it unique. *Thumbsup* I like the cool rhyme with "heard"!

It also made me think that times runs out for the physical existence, we race against it. *Laugh*

*Clock*The imagery of the eye of the clock, comparison to a song are effective and you tie the human dimension in with the "heart" and "thoughts" in verse two. The first verse is my favourite for its vivid imagery and message.

*Star*I like the philosophical vibe that made me ponder. Thanks for sharing your crafting and unique vision! Keep on writing!

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177
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
*Delight* Hiya just HOOVES!*Smile* Great to see you at 'I Write 2020! I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!*Glass**Tiara*


*Confettir* What a deep and interesting response to the prompt. I did not even attempt to get all those ideas in. *Facepalm* Thoughtful commentary too. I had to laugh at the imagery of the "flea" and "ample booties". What an vivid observation on the fact that they do believe
what they hear, this new gen. Ah the internet and google! LOL Eegads, some for sure would not survive the military. *Shock* Awesome reference to Gertrude Stein as part of your contrasting our gen and the new one!

*Confettir* I enjoyed entering your vision with its humour couched with some truth. It was fun to read aloud with its wonderful rhyme and flow. Your choice of words created a pleasing soundscape and ideas illustrated your message. I smiled at the comparison of donating blood and getting a tatoo. I can so see the mud wrestling too. I know some gals who do that tough girl challenge in the mud. *Smile* Maybe could live through military training.

*Confettir* The last lines are brilliant...ah yes back in our youth. What was said about us?
This poem is very well conceived and composed in quatrains with varying line lengths and a tight weave to reflect a serious matter. *Wink* It is impressive given The Cramp time limit too! *Salute*

Thanks for sharing you unique expression and giving us something to ponder. *Star*
All the best in the New year as you write on!

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Review of Indy Pendence  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Don Two!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Laugh* Oh my gosh. This poem is so inventive and I laughed at the guy's name which is a play on words. *Smile* The theme was fun and celebratory for a holiday entry and the prompt words you had to use are effective. Using the different foods made me think of the variety of nationalities that make up a country. *Thumbsup*

I like that he was surprised not every one would like fries and learned some new cuisine in his searchings. I had to laugh that he would add "fatter" things as if french fries are not! LOL I wondered why this verse was in brackets.

The four line verses are balanced and the rhyme was well done. The additional inner rhyme added to the fun and flow of the comical theme. The rhythm was even and so pleasing to read aloud. Good form and effective use of sound combinations! I admire your gift at this creation especially as you had to use these food words within your syllablication. *Thumbsup*

I was entertained by this character in the light-hearted atmosphere as he tried to please everyone. Thanks for the laugh tonight.

Write on into the new year.

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179
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*Delight* Welcome to WDC eshaw08! *Smile*
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Burstr*Yay on posting your first items at WDC! I liked the title as it made me curious as to what the fortune will be. That is unexpected makes it even more interesting as one can imagine all kinds of ways it would happen. *Smile*

*Star* I really felt the boredom Lindsey was experiencing and it seems realistic for a young girl in the country. My sister always wanted to move to where there was more going on! LOL I was sad the father was so disappointed. It was only a feeling and a question, an opinion. *Sad* So I am sure Lindsey felt bad then.

I wondered why you used capital letters on "WHOLE". To emphasize the idea you could use whole in italics. {i}whole{/i}.

*Smile*You have a really good beginning and I want to hear more what will happen. I see you have the genre fantasy so will Lindsey have something magical happen where she lives as the family will not move.

*Burstg* I wonder what the mother said. Was she more understanding or comforting. It sounds like Dad really is proud of being on the farm and it taking it wrong, as if thinking Lindsey didn't like it. mm. It is so relevant as sometimes communication in a family gets mixed up when feelings are involved. Good insight! *Thumbsup*

*Quill*Some ideas to consider to bump up the words on the page.

The second use of the name "Lindsey" could be replaced with "She". In fact, You might not even need to say that first line as we know it is a story. eg. something like: "Ten year old Lindsey lived....Gerogia with her...." *Wink*

*Quill* Just a little note, it is not necessary to keep repeating the name when "she" will suffice. The reader knows it is about Lindsey. *Smile*

Maybe put capital letters on the name of the farm : "High Falls" as it is like a proper noun.

*Quill* Some typos:
"Loved where she live".>>>> "lived"
"family had loved on">>> lived
"beaches ehe">> because he
"her fathers">>drop the "s"

*Thumbsup* You made good use of quotation marks, thank you. Next step: Put each speaker's speech on a separate line. *Wink* Just so it is easy to see who is speaking.
eg. She said, "Mom, dad...."
Her father answered, "Why? .....thing?"

*Star*I liked the glimpse into this girl's mind. It sounds like she is ready for adventure and new things and may have to create some fun. *Smile*

I hope these little ideas help you along. Keep on writing.

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for entry "Shark Fin Soup
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
*Delight* Happy New year Jody!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Fishb* Haha! I could not resist this title as I am doing recipes for the POND dinner! *Laugh* I have heard folks eat shark fin soup but I have never had it. One friend told me shark is tough.

*Fisho* Congratulations on your win with this entry. How cool to create a complete story in so few characters and you managed to have a surprising twist that made me laugh and yet it is not very funny in itself. It was brilliant. *Salute*

*Fishp* The one line story was a delight to read as the words flowed almost like poetry.
I liked the image and flow of "round and....brine". It made me think of sharks going in circles in the sea. The repeated "s" sound words added to the flow as well, even though you used the word "stirring" twice in short line. It really works.

*Fishg* Everything is in movement and then with the "white meat phrase" it slows down, like a breath.

*Fishb* Once I read the whole story, the image changes and the significance of going around and the white meat becomes clear. Genius! *Salute* It is interesting that the voice can still speak at the end. LOL

*Starstruck* Brilliant construction and imagery play! Thanks for sharing your gift and imagination. Write on in 2020! *Tiara*


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Review of NY City Lights  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Delight* Welcome to WDC Sophia Behalova!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight*Wow! I enjoyed this unique little free style poem. The short lines are concise and centering makes it visually pleasing. Reminds me of a tall building in a city. Maybe from the top you can see stars.

*Burstr* I liked the philosophical element in your expression as well as in the concepts of your second verse and the scientific idea about synergy. I do sound healing with voice and it does lead to awareness and oneness. Cool!*Cool*

*Bursty* I wondered if in the third verse "stare" is supposed to be "star" or are we gazing. *Wink* I smiled at "infinite glare"! Potent image.

*Burstg* I was a bit confused by the clear tear and "what's about".*Confused* The last line threw me off a bit. Guess it is the grammar of "who love I". *Wink*

*Burstb* Adding rhyme and words with repeated sounds like "E" made it fun to read and added to the flow. I don;t think we generally use the & sign for "and" in writing and yet its use here did not throw me out of the read or distract me. *Smile*

*Star* Thank you for sharing this fascinating creation and posting your gift here at WDC. I enjoyed pondering on it. I hope you will find a home here as you write on.


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#1300305 by Maryann

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182
Review of A Single Tear  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Jim!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*



*Heartbroken* Oh my gosh! This poem is so sad and I could really feel the aura of loss, hopelessness and isolation. Even that she lives in a basement adds to that feeling. The simple title drew me in and your use of it twice in the poem is potent.

*Heart* You showed the broken bubble of a fairy tale dream and illustrated vividly this girl experiencing betrayal and loss in two instances. You create a defined down hill spiral. I like how you show her as strong and hiding until it does not work anymore.

*Bursty* The quatrain verses were balanced with consistent rhyme and effective use of alliterative words and assonance and consonance. I liked "innards, intense inner". It was pleasing to read aloud in spite of the depressing aura of this girl's life.

*Burstr* It is cool how at the end her feeling so weak as she could not do her plan, reflects back to how strong she was at the beginning. Her true nature as a survivor. *Thumbsup*


*Quill*I wonder if a "period" would serve better in lines where the next line is a complete thought..eg. after "day' in "one day, He hugged..." I noticed of few of these. You used lots of commas.

*Quill* I think you can keep this active instead of passive . "was whispered in the air," could be "she whispered to the air" *Wink*

*Quill*This line flows ok though a little cumbersome. I wonder if you need to say "she felt" as we know it is about her and in her mind. "There wasn’t another path she felt could be crossed." It would also shorten the line to fit a bit better with the rhythm. I notice there is no set syllable count though. *Smile* I was involved in the story line and only noticed when counting.

*Quill*Another line that felt too long a cumbersome: "She awoke to find it cold in the morning’s sun rays." We can infer that it is morning or that the rays mean the sun so I think leaving out the word "sun". or... "daylight's rays". mm. We know she was waking up. *Think* Have a ponder.

*Quill* I thought the same thing with "He hugged and kissed her, said “I love you anyway.”
I wanted to shorten it up for better flow. Use either "hugged" or "kissed".
eg. He hugged her saying "I love you anyway." One can't kiss and talk at the same time anyway. *Laugh*

*Star* Your poem is so well conceived and evocative, touching on a relevant theme in our world with the message that fairy tales are not real. Idealism hurts. I admire how you can create long story poems and the emotional impact was so powerful as we follow her sad tale in a coherent composition. *Starstruck* I hope she will find her way to a happier place and let the ocean take away her woes. Great place to meditate and let go. But... we don't know the rest of the story, only glad she did not fulfil her plan.

Thanks for sharing your gift and vision. Keep on writing on with gusto in the new year. *Quill*

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Review of Noontime Lullaby  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Delight* Happy New year Crissy!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight* I was charmed by the lovely title with its interesting image. I think of a lullaby being for the night. LOL

*Heart*The poem has a romantic theme and I can sense the tone of love as I read it. Your imagery is clear and I like the setting for the engagement and how you use the natural elements and divine connection as if the union is blessed form the start because of the intent of the couple.

*Smile* The format of the poem is a bit free though rhyming couplets make up the most of the work. couplets suit the romantic theme and content. I enjoyed entering the experience and reading the flowing lines with consistent rhyme.

*Quill* The 6 line short verse in the middle seems like a memory. You also begin to use past tense with "sang me". Then the next couplet line one uses the past tense as well.

The verse took me out a bit as you begin so vividly in present tense as you share the wonderful experience and drew me into the moment.

The second half of the poem seems like more of a reflection somehow... like when you say "sing me again", and "I need to hear..." "sing me to sleep". It somehow does not make sense from the beginning when you are being in the moment of the engagement.
Also I thought the angels sang the lullaby. *Confused*

*Heart*I could hear the joy in the moment and the notion of the dream come true. I like the imagery of the clouds giving their sanction. I was captivated by the high vibration and sentiment of your expression.

*Star* Thanks for sharing your love poem that gives tribute to romance and the vitality of true love relationship.*HeartP* Write on into the new year!



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Delight* Happy 2020 Rhyssa!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Heartp*Wow!What an amazing and tribute to your grandmother where you share your experience with her as she slowly slips away. I infer that she had alzheimers, which is, indeed, heartbreaking to deal with. *Sad*

*Heartg* You were able to capture so vividly how you felt and what you do to cope and still consider her pride and confusion. I like the way you say You had to take the grown up role and will guard the memories on her behalf and yours. My grandmother had it at the end, but she did not live near us so we we never really had the total experience of the loss. It was bad enough for my uncle, with whom she lived. I can't imagine how a grandchild would feel watching it happen. You express this so clearly as well in the first line of the last verse.

*Heartt* The line about confusion using the word "lurks" is vivid as it makes confusion feel like an enemy and "guard the shell" is brilliant.

*Heartb* The Pantoum is an excellent choice for this emotionally charged theme. The repeating of key lines is emphatic and keeps the reader invested in the cyclical effect of the experience. Every time you say your name and meet your grandma, the process begins anew each time, the game of finding each other.The punctuation assisted the read, allowing for dramatic pause.

*Star* It is well conceived and composed poem with steady rhyme and flow that made it a joy to read aloud. The poem has a loving tone with an underlying grief. "The tears I must disguise" is telling. *Thumbsup*

*Heartp*Thank you for sharing heartfelt tribute to your grandma with such potency. I was impressed with the stellar composition and can appreciate how difficult it may have been to get it right as you were still feeling the effects of the situation. Grandma would be proud of your gift. *Starstruck*

Keep on writing from your heart on into the new year. *Quill*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Belly Dancer  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Delight* Hey Joy!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Music1* I was drawn to this piece as the topic in the title was appealing. I had a friend who learned belly dancing! I am not familiar with the form of poem in your tag line so I thought it would be fun to check it out. Thanks for the author notes on the Paradelle. *Smile*

*Delight* This is really different style and it really fits well with the image and dance of the belly dancer. The repetition of key lines is so effective like a musical beat or cycle. *Thumbsup*

*Salute* The imagery is so potent and your words describe vividly the actions of the dancer and veils. Wow! "Fallen angel ablaze in the wind" and "To Hades in a serpentine glide" are so evocative. I loved reading the flowing lines out loud and your word choices are elegant. The soundscape of the lines is effective as you have made solid use of assonance, alliteration and consonance. I am impressed with your wizardry.

*Heart* I can imagine how much effort this form took to get a coherent logic where the lines can make sense in different order especially that last verse! *Shock* Brilliant creation. I just realized you had to use all the words from the other verses. Whew! *Tiara*

I only got stuck on the last line in verse 3 with the word "which". I had to read again to get the sense. It does make sense, just took me a bit as it is an odd thing to say. LOL

*Starstruck* This magic is quite mesmerizing and mimics the flow of the dancer and the language and imagery of fallen angel, Hades and the snake is evocative. I loved this piece.

Thanks for sharing your amazing image and word craft. *Heart* Keep following your muse as you write on.


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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Delight* Happy New year Jace! *Balloonp*
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Soccer* Your appealing title drew me in with its humourous play on the word foot! The language of "a-foot" makes me see soccer in a higher light! LOL I have not written a Kyrielle yet so thanks for the author's notes.

*Soccer* I enjoyed reading the Kyrielle with its unique phrasing in quatrain verses. I think the refrain chosen is effective and you have captured the children's love of the game vividly. Yep, even rain does not bother them. *Thumbsup* I totally laughed at line 1 in the last verse. That is one big wind...and I assume the nets were portable. If not that is One big wind and good exaggeration to make a point. *Wink* I also see that kids are the gale force wind that knock it down. Little kids playing especially tend to be in a bunch running all over! *Laugh*

*Soccer* Including parental pride and excitement added to the truth of the piece. I ahve seen parents, especially with little ones cheering them on and sometimes with older kids, parents getting a little hype and pushy about winning, which takes the fun out for some.

*Laugh*I laughed at the line about "tide". Brilliant notion to show how dirty these kids get without saying so.

*Soccer*The form is well composed according to the rules you mention.The flow and tight weave of the lines is wonderful to read aloud. The first verse set a dramatic setting and the metaphor of the "hurricane" of kids is fun. The addition of french words and the turn o phrases like "it matters not", again gives the poem a higher tone of a tribute. I loved it.

*Soccer* I thought the rhyming words you chose were interesting and suited the theme. "air" and "laissez-faire" is unique and I like the word "refrain" in the short simple phrase. It is a challenge to get the right words to rhyme. Well done!

*Star* I had fun entering this vision. It has a happy tone and strong vitality that mimics the soccer game. Great choice of theme for the form. Thanks for sharing your gift!

Have a fabulous 2020 as you write and play on! *Soccer**Quill*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Hiya Words Whirling 'Round!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Salute* Wow! I so enjoyed reading this vivid vision of the suit. The concept in the title is a brilliant turn around of the old Fairy Tale. The inferred political comment is also clear. Well done!

*Burstr* The details of the suit are so vivid and it really feels like an outer symbol: looks good but... *Laugh* That the suit is created to hide some reality as in the gut etc. and that "exotic hide" shoes somehow will impress is a point well illustrated. The last line is rather sad comment. A hollow soul! Without mentioning names, I think the hair, skin and gut and play on the word "trumped" gives the reader a clue! Absolutely brilliant!

*Burstg* The four line verses were fun to read aloud as they flowed fluently with a wonderful rhyme scheme and pleasing soundscape elements. I only bumped a little over line 6 with the "Above spray tan orange" as it felt like a mouthful. The description is apt and made me smile.

*Smile* The first verse was my favourite for its flow and pace. The unique theme and image here drew me to read on! The use of alliteration and assonance with long and short "u" words and long "i" words really made it come alive on the tongue. " lined with lies" is excellent as imagery too. Fun!

*Quill*In verse two I wonder if you really need the word "Then" in line. It slows the pace a bit. Yet I know it is showing sequence. *Wink*

*Bursty* The "no coloureds please" is evocative. *Think* I connected it with "fueled by hate" too.

*Bursto* You have composed an fascinating picture with clarity of image and commentary that I think can evoke a laugh and a sadness at the same time. You certainly make a good point for those who have eyes to see. *Wink*

Thanks for sharing your gift and vision. Wow! The metaphor of the suit is potent.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Hiya Norman!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Smile* What a cool theme for a poem. I have not thought of Elvis in a long time though every so often the folks in a town not far from here have an Elvis festival..yep way up here in Canada. LOL I think they play up the old story of Elvis being seen places! *Laugh* so why not here?

*Thumbsup* I thought it was original to share as if you were having a dream where you see the highlights of his life and the fall in sequence. In a dream you can envision in a unique way. You capture his iconic stature vividly with detailed description. I think readers could imagine him the way he was and how he was at the end from your vision. I laughed at the last line..also iconic.

*Guitar*The 4 line rhyming stanzas flow like a song and while not all the lines have a patterned syllable count, the rhythm was lively and fun to read. I enjoyed the comparison in verse two in the off rhyme "older", "soldier". The voice and tone was consistent and I like how there is a tinge of sadness as the poet reminisces.
The last verse is a potent opinion that is born out as he was an idol to the end.
He was an icon of a changing time, one of a kind. *Heart*

*Music1* I wondered at the lack of punctuation but it is a choice at times. It works well without it.. I was just pondering if it would add something to use it. *Wink*

*Star* Thanks for bringing back memories with this well conceived poem, well deserving of its awardicon. *Starstruck* Rock on!


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Review of Ghost Dog  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Huntersmoon!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass*{e:tiara


*Heart* I couldn't resist this cool title about a Ghost dog! When my cat first passed on, I swear I felt him around at times. Freaky when you feel something walking on your bed at night and...mm! Yep, I think there are connections beyond. *Heart* Love never dies.

*Ghost* Your poem is a delight to read with its loving tone, almost like a tribute to this beloved pet. I was charmed by its name and how he got it! Sweet. I enjoyed the ghostly events that are attributed to this dog and the last verse is a lovely notion. I can so imagine the dog being impatient as they always are ready for adventure and attention...NOW! *Laugh*

*Dog1* The quatrain verses are balanced and flow with ease, using abab rhyme consistently. I tried to discover a defined syllable count to lines like 8,6,8,6 but found a number of variations. *Wink* I did not really notice when I read aloud as it trips off the tongue with ease. The bit of variety does not hurt the read and I was caught up in the interesting tale. Plus the poem has some wonderful use of assonance, and alliterative bits to assist the flow. I liked "death cannot deter", "spirit, wild and free" ( a cliche and yet gave me a sense of the dog's essence both alive and in the world beyond), and "snuggle near" (such a sweet image).

*Starstruck* This lighthearted poem was fun and made me smile, and think of my pets and of all of my friends who have dogs...who, you know, are people too! {e:heart} Thanks for sharing your ghost dog and his antics.



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Download This!  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
*Delight* Hey Jeff!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Laugh* I was intrigued by the title as there are all kinds of downloads! I was so happy to see the idea of mental downloads..as in psychic ability as more people are developing sight... and this is a scary idea that one could be totally vulnerable to another's mind.

*Burstg* The way the human solved the problem was genius and I infer that the aliens, who seem well travelled, have never had this sort of download! The concept that humanity is so nasty with obscenities is brilliant comment.

*Alien*I enjoyed the dialogue and you did a great job telling a whole story in the conversation of these two characters. I was drawn in by the vibrant first lines, a dramatic speech that made me curious. I laughed at the description of "you're a tiny little thing" and it set up the contrast in appearance. Tony's curiosity is childlike and evident.

*Delight* It was fun to read the conversation that really revealed the alien's disgust so vividly as well as Jack's sense of humor and his ingenuity sharing his not so nice experiences. Talk about Video downloads and assimilation! I think the idea he had no choice is like a red flag and a challenge.

*Thumbsup* It is amazing how you left so much to the reader's imagination too in the cryptic lines about the sacred creatures, what is possible etc. You keep it open for minds to go anywhere. *Laugh*

It was an effective ploy to use italics for the alien speaking from his mind while regular font indicated Jack's talking.

*Rolling*I burst out laughing at " that's just plain wrong" and the last line! Too funny!

I like the happy ending that Jack is the hero and earth is saved...at least from alien assimilation.*Wink*

*Star*Thanks for sharing your imaginative and comical writing! Good luck in the contest! I had fun! Write on into the new year!

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Review of High Hopes  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Legerdemain!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight*Wow! This was a unique and surprising response to the theme of high hopes and I guess gangsters can have them. I like that this guy was doing something kind of positive in getting out of the biz! What a way to do it! Great twist at the end. I should have expected it maybe. LOL

*Burstp*The short story caught my interest with the first line showing a celebratory action of the characters that made me curious to read on. High fives can be for so many things and they were out of breath so..they could have been racing. *Wink*

*Bursto*I like how you slowly reveal why Hendon wants to leave and we get a good idea of how his boss is as Merv's conversation furthers the story. The dialogue is useful and moved the story at a good pace. You don't say how old Merv is but I get the idea he is much younger as he has more fear of the consequences and wants to stay out of trouble.

*Burstb*I like how you have them look down the alley...Hendon for one purpose and Merv for another before the surprise hit. I smiled when he said the number of hits and it was now obvious he was well planned. It really showed he was used to doing it when he could do it to a colleague and yet showed also he knows quite well what Merv meant. *Thumbsup* I did wonder if it was wise to do it when there were already cops around seeking, in case they heard it.

Two glitches for me:

I wondered if "they'll" in the line "they'll have to lay low for a short while" should be "they'd". It sounded off to me. *Think*

This line: "Once you're in with Girardo, you're in." threw me off a bit as at first I thought Merv was speaking it...eg. the You... but then thought it was narration. Would it then not be third person? *Confused* Could just be me.

I enjoyed reading this shocking crime piece and it really did fit the theme. *Star* Thanks for sharing your gift. All the best in 2020! *Wand*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Delight* Hi J. L. O"Dell! I am happy to review your entry at "I Write in 2020" and for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party.

*Smile*Your short poem has captured the theme of the title as once animals reach this age, they need to make their way as independent. It almost feels sad but when one considers other mouths to feed...it makes natural sense.

The image of the wolf circle can be imagined with ease. I like the word "establish" as it makes me think of the yearling's progeny and setting his own dynasty. LOL It is not usual to use the same word twice in such a short poem as you did with "yearling" and as it is the key word it does add emphasis.

*Quill*I wondered if the two "yearlings" were the same yearling and which had the cubs to feed.
Why is there a comma after "pack" when it is a part of the next line idea?

*Smile*The use of the period after "on" is effective as it mimics a separation with the last line. Dramatic. *Thumbsup*

Thanks for sharing your appreciation of the wild and your crafting with only 24 syllables.

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Review of Tumbled Granite  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Words Whirling 'Round!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Tophat* What an elegant expression! I loved it!

The imagery from your detailed description is so vivid I could see it and feel it in my mind. The first line caught my imagination with "gray shoulders" and I was enchanted into your vision. *Salute*

*Delight*Your quatrains are balanced and it was a joy to read them aloud. The rhyme is well done ( only two places you used plurals eg. cool, pools) and your use of poetic techniques like alliteration, assonance and consonance created an appealing soundscape. "sliding silver glints" and "chill torrents tumble..drowning deeps" are wonderful examples. Each line seems carefully crafted to capture the pristine beauty of this space. Original expressions like "bald pates" sparked my attention and I could imagine those dragonflies.

*Dragonflyb* Using the present tense was potent as it put me in the moment where the scene unfolds and movements occur. The use of natural punctuation aided the read and pace. The enjambments were effective especially the line with "o'er". Not sure about "the" but I see the pattern you are making in each first line and it did not throw me out of the read. *Wink*

*Thumbsup* The title is evocative and a cool image in itself and the last word was a great surprise and harkened back to the title as the whole process repeats itself. I appreciate the time it took to do justice to this place in nature..to get just the right word pictures that appeal to the senses. I really get the sense of the seasonal flow here. Very well conceived. *Star*

Thanks for sharing your word wizardry in this stellar composition, well deserving of its ribbon! It took my breath away! I want to go there. *Bigsmile*




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Pain  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Welcome to WDC freelancer1131!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight* Wow! Congratulations on posting your first items. I like poetry so I chose this piece. I so enjoyed your tag line quote. I have not read Nietzsche in a long time and the notion here give reason for the lows and highs of life. It reminds me of polishing coal to a diamond.

Your expression here is potent in voice and the image of one struggling in the mind as hurt desires to throw him off base is vivid. The queries are relevant and I can relate to the state of mind. I was struck by the truth of "I wish I was stupid" and thought of all the times that being of higher awareness always seemed harder.

*Quill* The free structure fits the emotional content and theme and the personal voice is real. The repetition of "craves" is very effective as it is like a chant and repeating the word "evidence" as you have is a good device. I had to keep reading to the conclusion. Well done.

I could so sense the underlying "soul" power that lives beyond the mind's chatter and beliefs.
It is like the poet knows there IS more even if hurt is present. The mind will ever seek the why's while the soul knows the truth and joy beyond. *Smile*

*Starstruck*This is an evocative expression and the fact that "I get up again" is hopeful. Thanks for sharing your personal vision that inspires. One hopes in the writing of it, the way clears. *Smile*

Keep on writing and birthing your own star! *Star*

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Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Tinker!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight* Oh this is so brilliant! Not many write limericks about themselves and yours is not only humourous but celebratory as well! Congrats on becoming Yellow. ( I realize it was a while back but I never saw this poem til now! *Whistle*) It is a wonderful way to give tribute to your promotion!

*Bursty* It was a delight to read your limerick with its fine rhyme, flow and comical flair.
I noticed you followed the format though if line one was 10 syllables it would match with lines 2 and 5 for a 10,10, 6, 6, 10 syllable pattern. *Wink* It did not throw me out of the read aloud, just a minor point of form. *Thumbsup*

*Bursty* I laughed at the attributing "thinking " to being a yellow case.The contrast to the word "winker" is unique and made me ponder. I had to look up the different meanings. *Laugh* Too funny! Considering that the poet "expounded" before he was Yellow, I feel it will now escalate as well.

*Smile*The punctuation served the read and the dialogue added drama and I thought of someone who was so proud! Well done!

Thanks for sharing this very entertaining bit of genius! You have a gift for words. *Starstruck*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
196
196
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Delight* Happy New year Jody!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Delight*Wow! It was cool to find a bit of history in your port. I studied history long ago but never heard of this king so I was curious! *Smile*

*Thumbsup*I like how you set up a point of interest: that he was king three times! It seems an unlikely possibility as in those days ex kings either died or were killed. He must have been lucky. The name Dutiful certainly suited him. It is rather an amazing tale.

Your biographical report retells how he did it and the information is simply told, which is good for a children's genre piece. It was coherent and paragraphs were well organized,sharing facts. The voice was consistent with a factual tone.

*Quill*I wondered about adding this phrase to the next line to shorten the prior one in the second paragraph. "and was a mean and cruel king" . Something like "He was a mean....king, so in 326..." It would flow better and get rid of the "and". YOU could even use a more active voice as in " the nobles overthrew him and....Elidurus became king." Although "made him king" would work to if they chose him. *Wink*

*Questionp* I wonder why the other two brothers overthrew him. It might add some detail to the story. It sounds like he was quite a kind and forgiving person. I wonder who recalled the old king was in the tower. It would be cool to add a bit about the way of the land during that period of history. Yet, your topic was about the three time king.

It would be cool to write a poem tribute about him. I am keen to go and find out more! Thanks for this taste of old English history. Maybe add a link to a resource. *Wink*

Keep writing on in the new year and have fun! *Starstruck*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
197
197
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year Prosperous snow. Congrats on all of your fine work at the Contest challenge. *Salute* YOU rocked it!
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


I have been really enjoying reading through all the poems you have been doing and came across this one with its celestial title and I love stars! *Wink* Also I see it is a poem form with which I am not familiar so I am checking that out too.

Your cameo is well structured according to the note you helpfully added to the page. *Wink*
The poem imitates a brief image of deep space with its stars and light travels, kind of like a cameo. It seems that the beauty involves the stars, and how light travels as well as the sparkling effect.

I wonder if having a colon after "space" might indicate that it refers to stars, and light when you say Beauty in the first line.

I like the use of the word "bawls" as it is so unique and has a sound that mimics a wide space and means "loud sound". Cool! I wanted to put a comma after "hydrogen" as the next word seems to refer back to the word "light". I had to reread it. *Wink*

This was pleasing to read aloud for your words are well chosen for sound effect and thematic content. I could easily imagine this star magic. {e;starstruck} You share a lot of science in a short poem.

Thanks for sharing this expression and craft as well as your prolific imagination and scope of vision! *Starstruck* I am inspired to give this form a try.

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Review of Restless  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year and Welcome to WDC Madeleine.
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


Wow! I enjoyed reading this unique expression and can relate to restless night musings. Great topic to share. The genres you chose are relevant for the work as well.

I admire the way to have two poem streams in this free style presentation. It makes it seem like there are two voices and we all know the mind can have conscious and subconscious musings going on in our heads at the same time. Cool! *Cool* Using italics to separate the trains of thought was effective. It took me a minute to get the flow.

The contrast of the dark and light vibrations is vivid. I could see the image of the poet's and positions and feel the eerieness of the creeping night. Cool latin word. I had to go look it up as I have not taken latin in a while. The image in the first verse is so clear I felt for the sleeper.

I appreciated the soundscape as I read aloud too. Some awesome use of assonance and consonance as in "soft covers on cold feet", repeating "ee", "s" "d". "c: etc. add to the flow and atmosphere of the poem. *Star*

I was happy at the end when peace is found. The metaphor of the stranger into a friend is wonderful.

Thanks for sharing your startling vision. I appreciate the effort it took to get this into twin form and it did feel like a meandering night mind. *Starstruck*

Write on and I hope you find a home here at WDC.

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Review of I can't sleep  
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
*BalloonP* Happy New year whiskerface. I am here with a review to celebrate you as this popped up on the random Reads! *Delight*

I could so relate to the title and its theme. I have nights even when I am tired that sleep seems to keep at bay. I like that writing is one of your go to activities when sleeplessness strikes.

I like the directness of the first line to set up the experience. Just letting the pen scribble on the page is as the mind rambles I think can settle things. And it looks like you found a gem in that the ponderings led to ideas for your challenge. *Wink*

I was as surprised as you were with your "Really?" when you mentioned the prompt! Who thinks these things up? Also, how is a defunct band "covered" by someone who is dead? What does that mean? *Facepalm*

I laughed at the polarity of it will be tricky and then the vast flow of names (all of them I am familiar with) and the realization that it won't be a problem. I infer that it may have been that keeping awake...the muse wanting to get a handle on it. LOL

The writing feels like flow of consciousness that relates to the tag line of musings.
I think "its so much rubbish" should be "it's..".

Now I am curious as to which one you did! *Smile* I also wonder if this was all of the musing of the evening or just a shareable snippet. It is a short "Pouring out"! *Laugh*

Keep on writing and musing into the new year.*Star*


200
200
Review by eyestar~
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Delight* Happy New year and Welcome to WDC Vincent.
I am celebrating you with a review for "Talent Pond New Year Review Dinner Party!
*Glass**Tiara*


*Laugh* Oh my gosh! What an interesting title and the concept of a fashion virus is hilarious. This story in the form of a letter from a Lord of a township to the Kelpstone Minor people is so original and I had to keep reading.

*Penr* It does indeed read like a political response and the lord's voice is clear as he gives his advice as to what is to be done in a variety of cases that are being questions. I burst out laughing at the first line about the stovepipe pants and having troops sent out to assist and wiards researching the fashion plague that are luring the young folk. *Laugh* It is quite imaginative.

Your language suits the time and theme. I loved "rogue tailors" that "stitch these monstrosities" and the concern about "lips" from pork and the meanness of kicking Gnomes. *Smile* Your satire rocks!*Salute* "not dump garbage....in debate forum" *Laugh*

*Smile*The lord's name is unique and the way he speaks shows his character and concerns vividly. The letter was well structured and paragraphing made coherent sense.
I wondered if this comma after "state of unrest" should be a semi colon.

I was really entertained by your vision! Thanks for sharing this highly creative and well conceived letter! *Starstruck* Keep on writing and I hope you find a home here at WDC.


eyestar
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