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769 Public Reviews Given
771 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of Bring Me  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*BurstR* blackmagicwoman is a new WDC writer who has produced a number of items and I am struck by their ability to engage others' in their vividly described memories - with an excerpt/example, below: My only criticism is that it could do with a little more 'window dressing' in the setting out on the page. With some gaps between some lines.. centering perhaps - and if so inclines some little icons, or graphics. Never the less, the work is worthy on a stand alone basis and I have really enjoyed reading this piece.

*TreeCypress*

Bring me the colour purple in its rawest form
And the Ukrainian words that my grandmother once used
The pearl that fell from my lost necklace
Bring me the fifteenth summer
Or my first birthday
My father's best days


*TreeCypress*
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Review of Bette Davis Eyes  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Quill**Star* "Bette Davis Eyes- by writer, blackmagicwoman is one of WDC's Newest Newbies! I love this song too - and the sentiments expressed in this Free Verse Genre resonated somewhere in the back of the dusty boxes in my own mind... I loved the vignette style in which this was written... I see it as a prompt for a full-flavored story!

*Quill**Star*I confess I had to look up the genre which this prose/verse was written - as I am still learning too, and there is a lot to learn! So, for our mutual benefit, I've included the information here, in the hope that I'm not being presumptuous.


*Quill**Star* Free verse is an open form of poetry, which in its modern form arose through the French vers libre form. It does not use consistent metre patterns, rhyme, or any musical pattern. It thus tends to follow the rhythm of natural speech.
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Review of The Nanny State  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Firstly - Let me thankyou, Christopher Roy Denton for nominating my Handle, AJBurchell- Australia at the "The Witch's Garden - I didn't even know about the competition - going until 31st October! *ThumbsUpL* *Delight*


*Quill* *Glasses* Now, about your excellent 4,024 word Sci-Fi story, "The Nanny State created about three and half years ago in January 2017!

Excerpt

It wasn't that Abdul was opposed to Nanny's governance or her many decrees for public health and safety. Far from it. But something at the back of his mind silently screamed that man wasn't created to behave in an entirely safe and sane manner. ...

And Humor!

... Abdul tentatively lifted the ale and sniffed. The smell was unpleasant — somewhat reminiscent of urine — and a frothy scum had gathered at the top of the glass. Was John trying to trick him because he was new to this place? He glanced around and saw similar glasses of scum-topped liquid standing on most of the tables.

I can imagine going to a bar in Australia, for instance *CountryAU* - and asking for:" A glass of scum-topped liquid, Mate" - that would get you lynched as a subversive! *Laugh* Beer is a National Imperative here, Down-Under!

*Quill* *Glasses* Sex, Drugs & Rock n Roll in Sci-Fi Land! *Shock2* Very well written and totally engaging! Thankyou for an entertaining read! I won't mention the chill I felt at the Muslim/Cyborg World Domination theme! It makes me glad that my own lienage stops with my kids - as they are now not likely to contribute to the world's population growth, being confirmed bachelors! *ThumbsUpL*
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Review of Self-Worth?  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This little piece of philosophy on Mental Health in item "Self-Worth? by DeanJ really hit home today as I had to make a decision. Some of the problem I had was undoubtedly to do with my own sense of self-worth but also of factors which were affecting it'.

*Sun**CloudSnow* Well expressed and insightful - one believes that the writer certainly has significant life experience!

*Sun**CloudSnow* No errors detected and it was a pleasure to read something which resonated with me today - and made me feel better. *ThumbsUpL* *Delight*
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Review of Autumn on Earth  
Rated: E | (4.5)
"Autumn on Earth written by Newbie, Athena Rae Thompson has some luxuriant descriptors ... scents, sage and cinnamon, spiciness - lovely words with which to describe the character of Autumn and the festivities during that period of time.

*Pumpkin* I liked it mostly - but I suspect that there were times when less would have been more. By that I mean that I believe that words were added to to meet something of the writer's internalized criteria: I'm not sure if this is relevant but I noticed 3 stanzas with 4 lines each. Still, overall it evoked a very pleasing scenario and below, is the first stanza.


*LeafO*

Sage, pumpkin spice, and cinnamon
Changing leaves, falling leaves, and crisp errors
September sings of autumn joys
While animals hunker in pairs

*LeafO*

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Review of Energy  
Rated: E | (5.0)
That's the best Flash Fiction for awhile! Totally unexpected ending!! *Delight* I feel I'm becoming addicted to the genre... is Flash Fiction a genre? Well, it's one o'clock in the morning so excuse me if I'm getting a bit muddled.

Jacky is Back!! I've been following them for awhile.. stories are good but I crave that very unexpected twist which completes these little stories.

*StarY* *StarY* *StarY* *StarY* *StarY*
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Review of Commencement  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
That's what I call a perfect short story - what's the thing I like most? The possibilities at the end of the story! You heard right - the end of the story meets cred. criteria.

*Key* *Scholar* *SuitHeart* With a word count of 1000 words writer, NickiD89 has brought three people together - all with different expectations - and made it totally believable. I found this story tonight - but it was written on 12/07/2007. I'm really glad I found it! *ThumbsUpL* *Delight*
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Review of The Fall  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Written for the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge this item, "The Fall has layered perspective - over 3 generations in just under 300 words, mind you! Very clever! I also liked the way italics were used to show another, internal story - perhaps from the original narrator.

*Fairy3* Again tonight, I checked the bio, and sure enough, this is a mature writer, so depth, time and distance come more easily to seasoned story tellers, I believe.

*Fairy3* A poignant story which has a lovely ending - enjoyment guaranteed!
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Review of A Claiming Cold  
Rated: E | (4.5)
"A Claiming Cold written by Rae was written for
"Daily Flash Fiction Challenge and is in the genre of Fantasy - which I usually avoid. I don't know why this genre seldom appeals to me ... perhaps I need a more realistic link to my 'fourth dimension' reading journeys. However, I AM a big fan of Flash Fiction...

*Shield2* *CastleRight* I was surprised how easily I became engaged and invested in this little story, under 300 words - as per the contest's rules.

*Shield2* *CastleRight* I was fascinated by the inner workings of transportation to another dimension as described in this story.

"The Claiming Cold that started in my feet, had moved through me, slowly approaching my heart. Fear gripped me as I felt my fingers grow numb, but then I heard him, a low rumbling voice I recognized immediately. ..."

*Shield2* *CastleRight* Congratulations on Winning the Daily Contest! *Delight*
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Review of Glasses  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Newbie Gabby has been at WDC for a week! I liked this little ditty - I remember when I started to wear glasses as an adult and hated to do so! I only had to wear them for reading then, now I wear them all the time.

*BagP**Heel* *Glasses* I think this little ditty could be used for an ad! *Delight*


*BagP**Heel* *Glasses* Neatly set out on the page - not too long or over-worked - the complete rhyme has a pleasing and amusing effect.
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Rated: E | (4.0)
I love Newbie, Sidney D. 's Costumicon! Very nice!



*Quill* *Owl3* "A Childhood Memory - A Childhood memory - was an enjoyable read. A reminiscence of a particular memory. I also loved climbing trees and I had a favourite weeping willow, which was easy to climb and hide in with a good book and some snacks.

*Quill* *Owl3* Descriptions of mid- Summer heat - "I am sure the day was hot, but we never seemed to feel it. Now, I can’t stand outside in June for more than 10 minutes." ...

and ...

"We had conquered all the available trees in my backyard by that time in my youth...This one had been struck and felled by lightning sometime before we moved into that cookie cutter house on Laurel Oaks Lane. ..."

*Quill* *Owl3* My only criticism is that the font used to write the story was a little bit too small, I think. Perhaps try the next size up and see... *ThumbsUpL* *Delight*
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Review of I Am  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Dr Gonzo is one of this week's Newbies and has several pieces of prose and poetry in his portfolio already! Today, I'm going to review "I Am

*Quill* *Apple* I liked what I read, it was a good, solid piece of philosophy and personal reflection. Not overly emotional and it displayed a depth which I like to see in others' writing.

*Quill* *Apple* Like many writers' there is the lament that not many people read what is so lovingly and passionately crafted. It is a fact that there are many writers, many books, many stories... believe me, Dr Gonzo, there are as many readers, who cannot do without the written word of writers' like yourself. Please - keep writing and I will be back to read more from your port!
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Rated: E | (3.5)
The Just-Joined Newbie, Chérie has written 4 poems which reside in her portfolio.

*Tree3**Apple* The writer has a good command of 'presence' of the visual medium - with pleasing font choice and the use of enhancing emoticons.
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Review of Freeway  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Written for the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge Jacky is a polished writer, and I always enjoy their stories. This one especially because - I have done the same thing! For my eldest son, who was doing 12 hr nightshifts - 4 days in a row. ... I drove in the middle lane.. trucks hate you! Other drivers hate you! Why? Because you sit in the middle lane - doing the speed limit. *Laugh*

*CarB* A nice vignette which many people can relate to - I could see it published in the Reader's Digest, for instance!

*CarP* No sting in the tale but it does have a nice arc and resonates satisfyingly.
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Review of TAZ Got Lost!  
Rated: E | (4.0)

"TAZ Got Lost! was a winner at "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge - Again - the writer uses given prompts and must write a complete story under 300 words! *Shock2* Well done!


*Paw**Wolf* The story's strengths are: Amusing vignette which has a hint of mystery. It was well planned with a good story arc and satisfying finish.

*Paw**Wolf* The story's lesser quality: The story was oddly set on the page, which was a bit of a distraction.










[Embed For Use By Upgraded+]
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Review of Jacky always wins  
Rated: E | (4.0)

*Shock2* What bad luck! "Jacky always wins ... Never mind RockeyHarley - *Wink* Greed (sausage scoffing) and Avarice (Hoping to win all that money!) are deadly sins... *Laugh*

*StarY* That was a fun story under 300 words at the "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge and I enjoyed it!

*Type* *Down*

Stan led bill to the bottom row right above where the horses ran.
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
WOW! What a neat job of a song parody in "Hotel COWlifornia ~ Written for a contest way back in 2002 and accompanied by excellent graphics - one larger one and a small one, in the top left hand corner. Got to hand it to the artists - they do a fine job, too! *Delight*

Excerpt *Down*


There she stood in the fenceline, almost swallowed my cud
And I was thinking to myself, 'Hay! I could be her stud!'



Love the image ♥Hooves♥ *ThumbsUpL* *Delight*


** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
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Review of Crash Course  
Rated: E | (5.0)
"Crash Course by Writer_Mike was written for a contest, apparently - and in under 30 words! *Shock2* - Just goes to show that you can't be sure what a story has to offer sometimes - until you read the last sentence. I was certainly surprised, that's for sure and I think that the intro' created a cunning distraction! *Wink*
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Review of Trees  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I saw a review for this item, "Trees which made me have a look for myself. Just like the last reviewer, I too, remember walking through small forests of trees when I was a child and experiencing the rustle of leaves ~ the quiet whispers ~ the story of the trees. Simply lovely - written by jarich

*BareTree* *TreePine* *Tree3*


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Rated: E | (4.0)
I was drawn to this piece by a Newbie member and the more I read, the closer I identified to the message. Self reflection is important on a regular basis, but I think that, after particularly significant milestones and events, we are more inclined to take stock.

*Owl3* *Quill* The writer is angry with themselves for not making more of their opportunities, but that is the flaw of youth. George Bernard Shaw said: Youth is wasted on the young.

*Owl3* *Quill* My only advice? Don't forget to keep an accurate ledger; that is - one that points out all one's good points too. Self-effacing, graceful, feminine intelligent, a good listener, elegant... these are all desirable qualities, as seen by others - of you, I'm sure. Don't forget that! And don't forget, nobody's perfect.

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Review of 2020  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Good Evening Newbie Penny Withers You write really well, with a good command of grammar and syntax. I really did enjoy the story and so I have been a bit critical about some areas of your writing - because I feel invested in the piece - compliments to you, for that *Smile*


*Type*Too many to's... one will do... *Laugh*
I slowly tiptoed up the stairs. I have rarely used them as they lead to the attic, a place that I seldom go. to But I needed to.

*Type* Lovely, descriptive piece of writing *Down*

Suddenly, the black door leading to the attic is in front of me, the golden knob gleaming in the darkness of the night ... *Think* *HeartP*

*Type* But I think these little sentences need some clarification

I opened it to the first page. It was Mum’s. The obvious handwriting. I sat on some cushions and began reading about infamous 2020...

*Type*I think the following would 'read with better flow:

'It was Mum's - the handwriting obvious: I sat on some cushions and began reading about the infamous 2020...'
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Review of Time run out  
Rated: E | (4.0)
RockeyHarley has the Flash Fiction knack - this story runs to 250 words and is different in its presentation.

*Mars* *Saturn* The story is also in the SciFi genre. .. I always thought that writing in the sci-fi genre would be easier as there'd be more license to create any sort of wrap-up result the writer fancied.

*Mars* *Saturn* But it's harder than you'd think. The story still has to be credible even though the the devices used may not even have been in existence.

*Mars* *Saturn* I'm thinking of Star Trek and how, in the 1970's it was considered brilliant - while transporters still haven't been invented it still seems possible, to me at least... or is the concept just wishful thinking.... Yes, *Think* - I think it is.

*Mars* *Saturn* This story is kind of screw-ball sci-fi - but it works, for me at least. My only criticism is that spacing on the page, might make it easier to read and follow. *ThumbsUpL*

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Review of Shoplifter  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
I am taking a look at RockeyHarley and their portfolio this evening, since I was impressed with the first story I read after cruising around the Daily Flash Fiction Contest page. So... here is another one. I like the characters in this story they are real and easily come to mind. I was soon involved in the mystery that the story sets up in the first couple of paragraphs.

*Ninja* In under 300 words, dangal sets up a story which has tension and conflict - and then with a neat U-Turn, he manages a solution and an answer to the mystery. Really Good stuff!

*Ninja* No errors of spelling or grammar detected *ThumbsUpL* *Smile*
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Rated: E | (4.0)
RockeyHarley has written a a 280 word story for "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge and as the story is the first story written for the new prompts: fountain; chair; window. Now, if one had to write a story to prompts and had to do so starting from scratch, I would say that that would take a lot of imagination!

*StarB* I thought the writer was discussing the antics of a comedic jungle tribe, but he wasn't! *Shock2*

*StarB* It is fiction - it is also comedy and I'm sure other readers will get a kick out of it, too.

*StarB* No typos or grammar issues and the story was placed in a pleasing way on the page. Which is actually really important, and encourages a reader to invest in the story.*ThumbsUpL* *Delight*
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Review of The Mirror  
Rated: E | (4.0)
"The Mirror by StarrQueen Has the appearance of a poem set out in a 4-stanza-like set up on the page. Perhaps it is a hybrid prose/poem? ... Anyway, it reminds me of the experiment I used to do as a teenager - and really into horror *Laugh*


*Mask* I'd stare into a mirror and widen my eyes and wonder if there was any difference between eyes showing fear or eyes widened in readiness for attack (knife raised).

*Mask*This writer seems to have had a similar epiphany *Down*


The light turns on.
An unnatural face greets me.
I hear laughter.
I am no longer in this world.


*Mask* This newbie-writer can certainly put pen to paper and so has already made a great impression!
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