I loved this work. It was funny and also very sentimental. It first caught my eye because my Aunt and my Mother are the same way these two are. My Aunt is 81 and has left me her house and the contents. My Mom continuely says to me, "I hope I died first so I won't have to help you go through all this junk." I am more like my Aunt and have clutter all around. You just hit this right on the nail as they call it in the south. I look forward to reading more of your work. This is the funniest thing I've read on writing. com in a long time.
Keep up the good work! We have to have humor these days or I don't know what would happen to us all!
Diane
I loved this work. It was funny and also very sentimental. It first caught my eye because my Aunt and my Mother are the same way these two are. My Aunt is 81 and has left me her house and the contents. My Mom continuely says to me, "I hope I died first so I won't have to help you go through all this junk." I am more like my Aunt and have clutter all around. You just hit this right on the nail as they call it in the south. I look forward to reading more of your work. This is the funniest thing I've read on writing. com in a long time.
Keep up the good work! We have to have humor these days or I don't know what would happen to us all!
Diane "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .{/b}
It's good but needs a little work in misspelled words. I use my Word Program on the computer then do a spell check and copy and paste my work. Sometimes I do the same thing and get grammer and spelling errors anyway. You are probably like me and when your mind starts working you can think faster than you can type. With a little work though this could be a great piece. At first I thought you were comparing the numbers to age but then I caught on to what was going to happen. Sad indeed.
Keep writing. It's good just a little more work, editing, and such.
Diane
It's good but needs a little work in misspelled words. I use my Word Program on the computer then do a spell check and copy and paste my work. Sometimes I do the same thing and get grammer and spelling errors anyway. You are probably like me and when your mind starts working you can think faster than you can type. With a little work though this could be a great piece. At first I thought you were comparing the numbers to age but then I caught on to what was going to happen. Sad indeed.
Keep writing. It's good just a little more work, editing, and such.
Diane My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
I really liked this poem and understood how you felt because the image was so real of a love that is not permanant and that you cannot see. You did a great job in ee cummings style and not only that you did it saying alot about what happens these days when we meet people on the internet. Soon the newest wears off just like in life and in blends into nothing. You displayed that life's problems, work and relationships even get in the way of meeting someone to talk to that is a stranger but becomes more after feeling their words.
Keep writing. This is the second of your readings and I'm attracted to both of them.
Diane
I really liked this poem and understood how you felt because the image was so real of a love that is not permanant and that you cannot see. You did a great job in ee cummings style and not only that you did it saying alot about what happens these days when we meet people on the internet. Soon the newest wears off just like in life and in blends into nothing. You displayed that life's problems, work and relationships even get in the way of meeting someone to talk to that is a stranger but becomes more after feeling their words.
Keep writing. This is the second of your readings and I'm attracted to both of them.
Diane My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Go Noticed" .
I liked it and it showed alot of emotion and imagery. You do a great job. I could even compare it with a teardrop. Sounds like you carry your heart on your shoulder like I do.
Keep writing. Don't listen to the bad stuff. If it's coming out of your head and on to paper some people maybe a little jealous that you are trying.
Diane
I really liked this. I think if I ever went to Alaska that this is how I would really feel. I felt the cold, I saw the images, I smelled the freshness, the wind and cold touched my face. You used everything in this writing and it is very good.
Keep writing,
Diane
Wish you would check out mine as well.
I really liked this piece but it leaves me wondering if it is the death of a newborn child or is it the celebration of a child. Just leaves me a little confused but with a little work in letter the reader know exactly what you mean instead of being confused it would help.
Keep writing. Practice makes perfect.
Diane
I think this could be great with a few more details. It's very sad but I can believe that there is a love that strong. I just want to feel all of the five senses when I read something as strong as this is. With seeing, feeling, touching, smelling, and tasting this could be one of the better pieces I've read on this site.
Please read some of mine in return.
Diane
I really love you for sharing that piece of work. I feel that my work is a work of art. Even my paintings although I am not a profession painter reflects my feelings. In fact I got in trouble with an oil painting because my instructor was mad because my tree had shed more blossoms than hers had. I doubly made her mad because I said the pollen was extremly bad that year. It was my piece of art and I wanted to do it my way. Besides I had paid for the class and the supplies. Doing things her way would have just made a painting just like hers not mine. My work is personal. It makes me who I am. People who critize the grammer and things like that just annoy me sometimes because you can tell the subject I am trying to convey to people. One of my favorite poets in the sixties was Rod McKuen. He didn't go by any form or reason and I loved it. Anyway your definition as an artist sits well with me. I love the books that help me in writing...Fearless Creating, The Artist Way, etc.
Keep writing. I hope you'll read some of mine and I'll put you on my favorites.
Diane
The reason I only gave you a few gift points is that I am trying to make enough to continue my membership. We've hit some bad luck. Don't all artists?
I liked the poem but there was something missing. I remember being that age and being so excited and I guess that's what I missed. The poem showed the little girls going into womanhood, perhaps some sort of ritual a graduation or something and none of that appeared but with some work I think it could be a good piece.
Diane
We need these words said to us daily because we forget quite often that in order to love someone else we have to love ourselves first. I really liked this piece. I think it would be a beautiful card for a friend. You should think of writing different poems if not for a living but for giving something personal. I know the best writing I've done is those I've given to others.
Diane
I love it and it shows so much of how deep we really are. I suffer through depressed and this site has also helped me so much. I think the world needs to slow down. For me it's running much to fast and I think the world is out of control. We all have to have something.
Diane
Such a great tribute to your Father. I wish I would've had mine while growing up. I could only imagine. My little girl who is 22 has just such a Father and so does my little boy who is 25. My husband was more married to them than to me but it was worth it.
Keep writing.
Diane
Great. I feel the stress lifting. I teach Water Aerobics at the local gym and use noodles for making muscle develop. I feel so good and can sleep. There's something freeing about water.
Very good. I felt your pain one time over a 1st love/marriage. It took forever even after I divorced him not to feel my heart fall from my chest. You did an excellent job.
Review my work. I did a poem on my current husband. I think the name of it is "I can't."
Diane
I really liked this poetry because it was done in such a free style and brought into light how we come to be. Something that we do time and again is so amazing to me and for some reason you were so able to catch that in the moments. It makes you wonder if we do things over and over in the concept of reincarnation. That with life we begin but we know what we are to do from the beginning. We start out with crawling then proceed to walk through this life as others did. You did an excellent job. This is the kind of poetry that I read in the late sixties and early seventies. I hope to see more of your works in the future.
Diane
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This was really a different essay than the usual ones written for the sunrise contest. I really liked it because it made me think for awhile about how a day starts and begins like a newborn and ends as a mature person. This was good. I like the images that it causes to come into my brain.
Good work. Keep writing.
Diane
Really a good poem. I love the images because the water and the sun are good friends of mine because I am a part time water aerobic instructor. I can feel what you feel in the poem. I think this is a good thing because it relays to me that your voice is in this poem. Good job. Keep it up.
Diane
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