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606 Public Reviews Given
620 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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126
126
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Queenowl,
Thank you for this thought provoking essay.
I, too, would quibble with the definition of spendthrift.
I am curious if there is some tweak of meaning that has occurred over the years for these words?
Other words we commonly use have shifted in meaning over time, such as the word "let."
In the days of James I, let meant prevent.
Or "suffer," which then could be used to mean "allow."

It is frustrating to hear a word in common use today with a very different meaning in our brains.

I enjoyed this writing, and have no suggestions.
Write On!
Deb
127
127
Review of A Mother for me  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (4.5)
I give this review in response to my first reading of your short story, "A Mom for Me."
I had searched tonight for writing about mothers and daughters. I was melancholy as I thought about the chasm between my daughter and me.
I see you have not been on line for a couple years, so I don't know if or when you will receive this review.
Your writing is raw, honest, painful.
I feel the loss, the loneliness that you express.
And I would love to be your e mail "mom" to tell you, "You are precious, you are loved. I am here, and I will hear you when you need to talk."
I write this because I sit on the other side, I am a mother who longs to hear from her daughter, and cannot.

I hope that you are still writing, and that you have found moms who hug you and love on you.
I hope you have healed some.
Best hopes for you.
Deb
128
128
Review of Snow  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Amay,
A great while back you honored my port with a visit and a review. Thank you.
I found this piece, or rather many pieces with the subject of snow.
Enjoyed each one.
Favorites, I think are the septolet, and the final haiku.

Great work!
Hope the gifts turned out well, also!
Write On!!
Deb


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
129
129
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thank you for sharing this poem ShiShad, well done. Descriptive, moving.
I appreciated reading it. Especially liked the end stanza.

Write On!
Deb
130
130
Review of Mood in Poetry  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Vivian,
Thank you for this article regarding mood and poetry.
I appreciated the illustration with two poem examples.
I will be considering mood more when I write.
Thank you,
Write On!
Deb
131
131
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Grum,
This short story covers a lot of ground in a few paragraphs. Eighteen years worth of ground, in fact.
Well developed main character, the other characters, even Jenny's are less fleshed out, and from my point of view, as a former pregnant, single teen, I want to know more about her.
I am asking too much in a short story, I realize. And that said. I find this short story to be well-written, great descriptions, and dialogue.
Write On~
Deb


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
132
132
Review of MAIL FROM HOME.  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Vignette1*Personal Impression: Meg, I found this poem spoke to my heart as I think of soldiers I have known and their time in distant lands defending liberty.
*Vignette2*Tone & Mood: This was written with a tenderness and affection for those who are sacrificing their time, lives, yet it does not come across as preachy but exhorts the reader to support the troops with letters from home.
*Vignette3*Rhyme, Form & Flow: Good rhyme, form, flow. Well done
*Vignette4* Emotional Impact: This poem tugged at my heart as I read it.
*Vignette5*Grammar/Punctuation: No errors noted.
A personal note. My mother who is in her 70's wrote to each of my nephews, her grandsons every weekday while they were in West Point Military Academy and during their deployments. I will be sharing this poem with her. It tells just what she does, and it encourages me to get with it.

*Vignette6*Write On!
Deb


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
133
133
Review of Sunday Morning  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you, Jessi Jean, for sharing some great word prompts for Sunday activities.
Deb
134
134
Review of Coffee  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Poethero,
Disclaimer: This is my opinion. I hope it is helpful to you. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself in this work *Music2*

*Music2*Title: Suitable to the poem

*Music2*Form/Style: Free verse, it works for this reader

*Music2*Tone: Thought it is told almost journalistically, I sense caution, awkwardness from him

*Music1*Flow/Rhythm: No steady rhythm noted, more a parrying conversation.

*Music1*Rhyme: N/A

*Music2*Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation: Effective: backpedaled, capitulated, smirked, smiled and sighed. No spelling errors noted. A full stop at the end of stanza 2 would be consistent with the other punctuation.

Emotional Chord Struck: I felt for him at his rejected goodwill gesture. Hoped she would soften and warm to him and give he a chance...
A totally unrelated chord struck. As a birthmother, I reacted strongly to the image of the child waiting for a meeting. Breaks my heart...

Overall: Nice brief picture in word.
Write On!
Deb
135
135
Review of Smooth As Glass  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Thank you for sharing this short video in words of the immediate aftermath of your father's death.
I am effected by the simple words that carry such weight. The descriptions of your father, the view in the window of the planes, the separation between you and your father's family.
I hope you received some healing in writing and sharing this story.
write on.
Deb
136
136
Review of Tears and Rain  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (4.5)
Disclaimer: This is my opinion. I hope it is helpful to you. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself in this work *Music2*

*Music2*Title: Suitable

*Music2*Form/Style: This free verse poem well suits the subject, its gentle, short lines are like softly falling tear/raindrops. I would suggest that the author consider centering the lines. I believe it would visually enhance this poem.

*Music2*Tone: Mellow, almost solemn, a quiet prayer for a friend.

*Music1*Imagery: effective

*Music1*Flow/Rhythm: The flow is good, smooth, except for a couple lines that seem to ask for a pause: I would suggest a comma after "on and on" and after "the soul"

*Music1*Rhyme: the rhyming seems to be random, but it does not detract from the reading of this poem.

*Music2*Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation: good word choice. I believe it should be "hide the shining sun," instead of "hides the..." to agree with "clouds"

Emotional Chord Struck: I resonate with this poem of sympathy and care for a hurting poem, I have written a similar poem to process the same emotions.

Overall: Well written. A good read.
Write On!
Deb
137
137
Review of Broken Vessel  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
DISCLAIMER: *Vine1*This comes to you as a reader would see your work. I have only my opinion to
> offer. Sometimes I might find a bit of your work I thought that I might express feelings
> about. If it struck a chord etc. If there should be such an entry under 'EMOTIONAL
> CHORD STRUCK' that is just my feelings and not meant to hurt or take liberty with the
> author's work.*Vine2*
>
>
> *Leaf*TITLE: Very Appropriate to this poem and subject.
>
> *LeafBr*IMAGERY: The theme of self as a broken vessel is a vivid image, and works well in this poem.

> *LeafG*EMOTIONAL CHORD STRUCK: I relate to the writer's feeling of loneliness, despair, pain, and rejoice in the realization of hope in his savior, end result is uplifting.
>
> *LeafO*TONE: Shifting from dark and sad inward looking to outward vision of others needs.

> *Pencil*SPELLING/punctuation ERRORS: In the brief description: despare, should be despair. I would suggest the inclusion of more punctuation. It would help guide the reader in pausing at the right places.
>
> *LeafY*FLOW: There is no regular rhyme, or number of syllables per line, so the flow is not smooth. This is not unpleasant, if it is the author's intention.
>
> *LeafR*OVERALL: I found this poem through the sponsored items view. I am pleased to have read it.
Write On!
Deb

138
138
Review of Indifference  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with Catharsis: Writing to Survive!  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Ystab,
Thank you for posting this poem.
It conveys the anguish of being ignored, to the point of the one desiring attention dying.
I felt the last stanza was appropriately climactic.

Write On!
Deb
139
139
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Dear Legerdemain,
This brief piece of opinion struck me deeply tonight. A friend's wife died unexpectedly leaving 3 young children and my friend to carry on.
This piece challenges me to stop thinking of the horror of her brief illness and death, but honor the wonderful gifts of herself she left behind in memories with her family.
Thank you for writing and sharing this piece.

My own experience of loss and grief has been more melancholy. I wrote a poem "Solitude" which I think is better than one you reviewed recently (Homage to an Illusion) Thank you for your honest remarks on Homage. It has been "privatized"

Your challenge to remember the life, not the death is appreciated.

Write On!
Deb
140
140
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Kristina,
Thank you for sharing this poem. It is an accurate picture of the world I, too, see.
I hope your view of the world as it could be comes to pass.

Deb
141
141
Review of Kaden's Lullaby  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (5.0)
Pat,
These lyrics are so suitable to the melody, Rock-a-bye Baby. You have expressed well the love and preciousness you feel for this little boy.
Well Done.
Write on!
Deb
142
142
Review of Self Pity  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*PawPrints* *PawPrints* Title: suitable, sets the tone well
*PawPrints* Personal Impression: I read this because I indulge in a fair amount of self-pity, and wanted to rub in it like a dog with a fresh pile of something.
Tone & Mood: woe is me, the mood is set... but it isn't over yet, and the writer points out "self-pity will hold us as long as we let it"
*PawPrints**PawPrints* Rhyme, Form & Flow: Rhyme-N/A, Form: interesting use of form as the self-pity builds, the lines lengthen. Flow: see grammar comments.
Emotional Impact: I appreciated the subtle charge to not stay in self-pity's grip.
*PawPrints* Grammar/Punctuation: My opinion is :please use some end punctuation in this piece. You used some commas, but then I didn't always follow when the thought was complete. I wonder, did you mean to place a period after "things will be better" instead of a comma. You then capitalized We, so it caused a little confusion to my reading of this piece when you used punctuation haphazardly. Just my opinion for a smoother, more coherent read.
Overall: I liked the visual descent into self-pity and the challenge to break free.
Write On!
Deb

143
143
Review of Anguish  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (5.0)
Renee,
This free verse poem is so descriptive and full of imagery of the Anguished Soul... You illustrated it so well.
I have no suggestions, just wanted to share that I found this poem to perfectly suit the Title, and to encourage you to:
Write On!
Deb
144
144
Review of The Garden Statue  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (5.0)
Harry,
I found this storeom? while reading the submissions for the poetry contest. I am deeply moved by your depiction of the garden statue, and the brief, perfect moment early on Christmas morning when the Christ Child is revealed.
Thank you for sharing this piece.
I have no suggestions.
Write On!
Deb
145
145
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E | (5.0)
Sorry I am not "taking time" for a thorough review of this thoughtful, informative, and well-written piece....
I didn't want to lose it as I sign off and get back to studying Anatomy.

Thank you for sharing this poem about Weaving.
Enjoyed it very much.

Deb
146
146
Review of This Respite  
Review by iluvhorses
In affiliation with The Brainstormers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
SWPoet,
Thank you for sharing this poem. It is so real to me... Though I have not been through a length of time apart from my spouse, I have experienced the hesitancy, uncertainty of trying to learn to live in sync.

This piece contains beautiful, vivid imagery, and speaks eloquently of the struggles of this time in this relationship.
I have no suggestions.
I do like the centered lines. The fit the idea of the trapeze in the circus, in my mind.

Write On!
Deb
147
147
Review of Fair Exchange  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Disclaimer: This is my opinion. I hope it is helpful to you. Thank you for sharing a part of yourself in this work *Music2*

*Music2*Title: Suitable to this piece

*Music2*Form/Style: Appropriate for a tribute, for the content of this piece

*Music2*Tone: Straightforward, earnest. Brings home the message.

*Music1*Imagery: Good: especially liked: "not a robber", "feral soul", "never plunder my reserves"

*Music1*Flow/Rhythm: Easy rhythm, smooth flow to my ear.

*Music1*Rhyme: N/A

*Music2*Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation: Good word choice. No spelling errors noted. I would suggest a comma at the end of "dispenses wisdom and truth," and after "No, no"

Emotional Chord Struck: A good read, encouraging to hear of such a constant friend.

Overall: This piece was a good, solid read. Liked the message. Hope the friend hears it, too.
Write On!
Deb
148
148
Review of THE LAST MARCH  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Sorciere,
This is a tough poem to read. As is the knowledge that humans can be so cruel to one another.
Thank you for writing this heart-wrenching history of your father's march.
I have no suggestions.
Write On!
Deb
149
149
Review of Two Mothers  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: E
Pat,
Thank you for sharing this beautiful, touching poem about two mothers.
Its imagery and emotion is heartfelt.
I have no suggestions, but am thankful to have found and read it.

Write On!
Deb
a birthmom
150
150
Review of Angry  
Review by iluvhorses
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Suteki,
I get it. Thank you for writing and sharing this piece.
Wouldn't it be a beautiful place if there were a sequel: say "Serene"?
For myself, Serenity is difficult to hang onto...
Life seems to be a perpetual Step One.

Write On...
Deb
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