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Review of The Results  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones



Hi Rick,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Results

First Impression: Oh my, where did the solar systems disappear, I was hoping Phil would have a ready answer to his panicked boss but then we wouldn't have the great ending.

What needs your attention: Nothing distracted this reader in her enjoyment reading your unusual story.

What part I liked best: I chuckled at all the reports buried on the desk, we sure do like to generate paper trails don't we even with all the computerized equipment we have. Phil obviously hadn't sorted thru all the papers or the report wouldn't have been buried on his desk.
Then I got to the conclusion and I burst out laughing, what a great surprise ending.

Overall impression: This story had an interesting hook in the beginning with a strong middle that kept the readers interest until the climatic ending. I have to say it again, the ending was perfect, I never expected to see God Wants It Back!

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my IMMENSE pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Very enjoyable Rick, I loved your sense of humor with that ending. Write on!
Lyn


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402
402
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Hi Barbarella,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Daily Journal in the Life of Writer

First Impression: Blogging independently is harder than it seems. There is always that blank page before you and then there is the muse who seldoms cooperates.

What needs your attention: Blogs, are the one place where no two should be the same. I hope your muse returns and we see more entries in your daily journey in the life of writer.

What part I liked best: The inspiration pieces were perfect and feel right in your blog. The unicorn is beautiful and the quote with it are right on writing and learning are both learning experiences. Myself, I find my learning is best if I see it, read it and then write it for me to retain the information. My brain does not function like it did before I was injured so learning requires a more active process for things to linger longer than a butterfly fluttering on a flower petal.

Overall impression: That you do keep coming back and writing. If I may suggest Blog City, BCOF or 30 Day Blogging Challenge to help you commit to daily blogging. I am sure you will find the camaraderie enjoyable and inspiring.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Keep on writing, don't let that unicorn become lonely.
Lyn


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403
403
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones



Hi Jace,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Ballad of Aurora and Cisco

First Impression: My granddaughter Olyvia is three years old and she lugs my cat Macavity the same as Aurora lugs Cisco. Cats are usually not very tolerant of young children carrying them and it appears Cisco is by your poem is making his objections heard.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the short narrative poem works very well in this incidence. The rhyme feels natural and flows smoothly.

What part I liked best: In my mind, I imagine your granddaughter has lively little girl with lots of energy trying to teach Cisco how to dance. She overrode his objections while Mom videoed the whole event. Aurora must have enjoyed having a poem written about her and Cisco. Have you considered creating a children's book with pictures illustrated? Children love having books about themselves.

Overall impression: I'm a grandmother myself so I truly enjoyed spending time reading about your delightful granddaughter Aurora and Cisco. What a lovely name!
My home belongs to three felines Yeats, Purryl and Macavity and when my grandchildren visit they are very vocal about their routines being disrupted similar to Cisco.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Awesome job!
Lyn


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404
404
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Hi Sparky,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Garden of Pripyat

First Impression: This really made me pause and ponder the sadness and futility of their existence. The narrator created a very dismal setting with his imagery and word selections.

What needs your attention: Not a thing, the aa bb pattern does not feel pressured in any way. The stanzas contribute smoothly to each other and flow into a a thought provoking tale of despair.

What part I liked best: Book and chapter, verse, the letter none describe the unspeakable. That appears to be a pattern in history we refuse to break, unfortunately. Everyone source applies their own twist on the truth and the facts get buried in the crap while innocent lives are lost.
The line about shadows of graffiti the only statements to the fallout rain rings haunting true in more locations than Pripyat aorund the world especially since ISIS has widened their target areas. So much violence and destruction in our children's world it saddens me to no end thinking of their future and how many more Chernobyls will occur.

Overall impression: A very thought provoking work that reminded this reader how bleak our future is for our children and how many lessons from the past we still have not learned.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? I'm going to bed and dream of a deserted island where none of this despair exists yet anyway.
Lyn


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405
405
Review of Table of the Dead  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with Blog City ~ Every Blogger'...  
Rated: E | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones



Hi Cappucine

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Table of the Dead

First Impression: Initially, when I was looking around in your port I saw poems and knew this is where I would return. I love poetry and then I saw the cool table and here I am with the superstitions.

What needs your attention: Wicked cool 14 lines with a rhyming pattern of abab that adds to the superstition. A perfect sonnet!

What part I liked best: I loved how you created the scene, the imagery perfectly enhanced the eerie feeling of a curse and the 13 lucky diners get to break bread. Candelabras pours a pool of gold on forks and knives, added to the illusion of magical experience.

Overall impression: This was a delightfully amusing poem that made me chuckle. It would make a great contribution to a Halloween themed book. The picture of the table added to the creative genius of the sonnet.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my IMMENSE pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Cappucine rocks poetry!
Lyn


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406
406
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones

Review 14

Hi Gabriella, It's been awhile, I hope things in your world are going better than the last time we spoke.

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Looking Back: A Sliver of the Past

First Impression: A haunting glance about a mysterious man that we know is sitting on your bureau.

What needs your attention: There were no punctuation or grammar errors to distract this reader. The sentences flow smoothly from one to the next creating an enjoyable story.

What part I liked best: I enjoyed how the narrator never named this mysterious man but we learned that he was an architect and they traveled together for work projects. They enjoyed walking together in the Maine woods silently while enjoying nature's concerto. He was a poet but the narrator didn't indicate that he took it beyond a hobby. He and the narrator parted ways because he needed his isolation more than he needed her company. The man was a fool to leave the narrator behind.

Overall impression: I loved the glimpse of a man that apparently mattered a lot because his picture remained on the bureau even after he left the narrator. We learned so much about the man and his interaction with the narrator in this haunting glimpse of her memories about a time that she held tucked away until the photograph reminded her.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my IMMENSE pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Write on Gabriella! I'm missing you here on WDC! Be well, my dear friend!
Lyn


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407
407
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
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Review 13

Hi

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Silence of the Lamps

First Impression: Wow, this is a compelling story with crazy tension that holds the readers attention from beginning to end. I actually read it twice because it was so good.

What needs your attention:
(There was a lot of reading (and more vocabulary lessons that I’m proud of having needed.) I think you intended I'm not proud of having needed.

What part I liked best: The narrator telling the story from her point of view made it seem all the more real. Her telling it in the way she did referring to John as she did hid the details of his disappearance cleverly until the climatic point of the fire that really didn't happen or did they? The mysterious event stole her husband from her on their honeymoon. So tragic! The detail unfolded perfectly, I felt like I was sitting in the room with her as she told us every sad detail and how she was fighting the evil now.

Overall impression: This tragic story of John and Jane lures you into a mysterious old inn in Vermont where the event happens because of a conference John needed to attend. Every detail was woven into an intricate story that kept the reader devouring every word. Awesome job, Cat!

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my IMMENSE pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
Lyn


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408
408
Review of Voice Choice  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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Review # 9

Hi Red,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Voice Choice

First Impression: I found deciding the voice of my poems to be one of my hardest decisions to make when trying to target a wider audience. This article planted so seeds in my head that I hope to grow further.

What needs your attention: This was written in 2002 and the link given is broken. It would be awesome if you edited this article and added functional links for expiring poets like me to gain more information to master our skill.

What part I liked best: That you chose to share your knowledge about poetry to help aspiring poets understand how to apply different techniques. I agree there is nothing worse than reading a poem when the author has forced a rhyme, it takes you right out of the flow of the poem.

Overall impression: There is good information here and I hope you will consider updating the links to help other aspiring authors with their technique. Writers helping writers on WDC makes creating works of art so much easier than struggling to grasp the details among all the ads and clutter on the internet.

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Have a great day Red, Write on.
Lyn


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409
409
Review of The Moonstone  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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Hi Theresa,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Moonstone

First Impression: The love Addison felt for his baby sister, Rachel, vibrated off the page from beginning to end, it warmed my heart to be with them on this journey.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the story flowed smoothly from beginning to end. I did not note any punctuation or grammar errors while I was reading.

What part I liked best: Thank you for the larger font, these old eyes tire quickly.
Addison assuring his little sister with a lie to ease her fear about going to see Kaci, Mandi and Sylvus. Her fear of the dragon was holding her hostage and Addison assured the power of his sword and her moonstone would keep them safe. Little did he know that the moonstone would soon aid Rachel when she entered a burning home to save Sylvus. Great moment of tension with a happy ending.

Overall impression: A interesting twist to encourage a reader to step out of their safety zone and to face their fears head on. Addison gave Rachel a tool to use to face hers.
I enjoyed taking this journey with Addison and Rachel to see Kaci, Mandi and Sylvus, it was a fun story to read. Great job!

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say?????
Lyn


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410
410
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones

Hi Norb,

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: The Missing Windows

First Impression: I was struck with massive sadness as I read, I'm not ready for the missing windows yet I at my age they have become almost a norm.

What needs your attention: Free style totally works for you, it flows smoothly with cohesive thoughts adding to a powerful conclusion.

What part I liked best: Two particular stanzas struck a chord with me. The first being another check in the mail on a week of Sundays, once more ducking the gallows of public gaze. If only it was that easy to avoid public gaze I would be invisible but reality is no matter how much we attempt to avoid memories they appear at the dangest times.
The second stanza which I am sure you anticipated reactions is ironic masturbation with technical fascination, in my mind I see the continued stroking of the keyboard, hoping to lose one's self desperate for success but the goal is elusive and when the realization that what we have forsaken with our efforts comes pain and guilt. Great imagery with the words chosen.

Overall impression: A poignant reminder to appreciate all we have and what the price is when we attempt to avoid what is painful to us. Unfortunately, all of us have to learn these lessons the hard way, don't we?

Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Happy Anniversary Norb!
Lyn


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411
411
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
House Florent Image for G.o.T. "Game of Thrones

Hi

My name is Lyn, I am one of the sly foxes.

Title: Reincarnation Theory

First Impression: A thought provoking poem, the lines need to read more than once to absorb the witty wisdom of the author.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the free style totally works for you. I would recommend you separate noone to be no one.

What part I liked best: This stanza struck a chord with me
"the general population is not the tour guide
tread slowly at first
American Satan is watching overhead
from a 38th floor window
waiting for you to buy in when you sell out
who needs presidency
when idolization is more profitable
nobody wins stop trying"
because of all the ridiculous election coverage this year. It is very apparent that our system is flawed when a character like Trump is considered viable representation for our country.

Overall impression: The thoughts flowed smoothly from stanza to stanza but for all the information to totally sink into my old mind I did need to read it more than once because of the length of the poem and all the information put out there. It saddens me that we repeat the same mistakes over and over and the end result is we're burned for our mistakes.



Thank you for allowing me to read your work. It has been my pleasure.


What does the Fox say????? Happy Anniversary, Norb.
Lyn


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412
412
Review of "Sea Moods"  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review number # 9

Hi GerMac, looks to me like you shortened your first and your last name here, cool!

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Sea Moods


First Impression: I was crediting the reviews for Simply Positive and read Cinn 's review and was curious. I am very glad I came.

What I liked: I love the surreal feeling you created, it did make me feel like I was walking a long the shore. You must not be in Jersey, every time I've been there are so many seagulls hovering and squawking.

What needs your attention: I'm not sure why you capitalized each line because it's not really necessary to in poetry. It didn't take away as I read, I am only asking as poet to poet and my incessant curiosity.

Favorite Parts: I was impressed with the word choices they flowed smoothly creating a surreal feeling and image. Lucid blue and foamy spouts are awesome images. I chuckled as I read sunbeams laugh, just as I do when the icy cold water tickles my toes and scurries back.

Overall Impression: There is no doubt in mind that you are a sea worshiper like me, the feel of your poem shows love and respect of its power.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my IMMENSE pleasure! Welcome to WDC, I hope to see more of your work.
Lyn



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413
413
for entry "for Rachel, again
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Review number # 8

Hi Rhyssa

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: For Rachel, again


First Impression: A child doesn't notice these things until he is older and the bond between them is secure. Curious yes, but the love exists deeply between as it should be.

What I liked: My heart broke feeling the narrator's sadness sharing what the boy she thinks the boy will see.

What needs your attention: Nothing, it is beautiful as is.

Favorite Parts: All the things she still does, playing piano and driving a car. I wish I could do either one but that wasn't my fate. Yes, there are things we all miss and we learn to adapt just as your narrator has. For me, not being able to drive with my blackouts, now I get to be Miss Daisy and I do it in grand style if I do say so .

Overall Impression: Beautifully told, Rhyssa. I am going to miss reading your poems, see you the next round.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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414
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Review of Carry Me  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Review number # 6 of week

Hi J. Thayne

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Carry Me

First Impression: Thank you for addressing a difficult and often avoided topic. People tend to see the whole soldiers and simply forget the risks each face in duty.

What I liked: I enjoyed it from Elly's point of view, the anger and raw pain came alive on the page as I read. Most stories you read are about male soldier's so this was refreshing to me. Her frustration with the system, and her injury spoke volumes about her character. She's my kind of character!

What needs your attention: Reading on a computer is challenging and when the spacing is so close it makes reading difficult. It would be easier if you changed the spacing for the readers ease.
I did not find any punctuation or grammar errors that distracted the reader.

Favorite Parts: G I Joe and Elly explaining her injury to the young boy, that was very well done. In the real world, parents tend to quickly draw their children back making the situation even more painful and awkward. I thought you allowing the child's curiosity to unfold was perfect.

Overall Impression: A thought provoking and at times heart wrenching read but well worth the time. Congrats on your Quill nomination.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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415
415
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Review number # 5 of week May 12-18th

Hi Old Warrior, interesting handle choice.

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: The Lone Traveler

First Impression: Wow, I was swept into the story like a leaf on a stream, briefly fluttering before I realized it I was well into story and seeking more.

What I liked: I connected immediately with Analia, I agreed with her I'd pass on her given name too! Mine is Lyndalee, I used Lynda and then a dear friend shortened it to Lyn. That works even better than either of the other choices.

What needs your attention: Nothing, distracted me in my read and I do tend to notice grammar or punctuation errors. The paragraphs flowed smoothly and consistently, nothing distracted or drew me out of the story.

Favorite Parts: Ana and her dragon Whiff, I chuckled at the name. Her independent nature and strength of character were believable, in my younger days I jumped right into a similar situation when three boys were bullying another, I never considered the risks all I saw was someone being hurt. So Ana's intervention totally rocked for me.
Uncle Rykkon is quite the blustery character, the King should have known better considering their history together. Leave it to a woman to do the real research of the matter, that made me chuckle too!

Overall Impression: I am enjoying your writing style immensely, your characters are convincing and engaging to follow. The pace is perfect for this reader. Congrats on your Quill nomination, it is very much deserved.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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416
416
for entry "unpaid line editor
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Review number # 3 of week May 12-May 18th

Hi Rhyssa,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Unpaid Line Editor

First Impression:
It is not easy doing the line-editing or to be on the receiving end to me. I've done both now and to me it is far worse having all the red lines, and squiggly marks appear on my work. Your poem reminded me of some memories not to far back when I was in college and Vic was proof-reading my papers for me before I turned them in. We finally agreed that it would never be before bedtime, so we could continue with never going to bed angry. I hated having my creativity stifled with rules and the discussions would become intense.
Probably why I enjoy poetry writing more than I do stories, I can get away with more.

What I liked: I chuckled when I came to
with eight pages.
she needs ten.
page by page,
paragraph by paragraph,
sentence by sentence,
word by misspelled word,

This has to be for a child, it's clearly a gift of love.

What needs your attention: Nothing, you wove a master of story telling.

Favorite Parts: The narrator sharing a memory with us as she helped someone special create a masterpiece giving up precious sleep.

Overall Impression: I think you and Vic can easily commiserate on sleep loss and line editing.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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417
417
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review number # 4 of week May 5-11th

Hi Timtu, Here I am, as I previously mentioned I had to continue reading your discussion.

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Some Final Words on E.T. Brains Part 2

First Impression: The saga continued and was just as engaging to read as the first. Some authors start off like a ball on fire and then peter out but you did not.

What I liked: That the author noted he was not insisting one view was preferable over another. It was his intent to raise points for discussion. I was not familiar with the Drake Equation. I found it fascinating! Thank you!

What needs your attention: Nothing. You are an excellent writer ! No grammar or punctuations errors noted.

Favorite Parts: I chuckled when the author invited the reader to visit Roswell. Dr. Spock is a great character choice to conclude your discussion. "It does not seem logical."

Overall Impression: The discussion was engaging to read and well thought out with interesting points for the reader to consider and to make connections with like The Day the Earth Stood Still. I am inclined to agree we are more dangerous.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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418
418
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review number # 3 of week May 5-11th

Hi Timtu

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Some Final Words on E.T. Brains Part 1

First Impression: I agree with the thought that E.T. being capable of conscious cruelty as Hawking notes. I am not inclined to assign behavior expectations to unknown enmities.

What I liked: How the author broke down each point with clear discussion points so the reader could pause and reflect on the subject.

What needs your attention: Nothing, your grammar and punctuation appear right on to this reader. Nothing, distracted this reader in this informative piece at all.

Favorite Parts: I thought the discussion about Independence day was very engaging to read. I just don't buy into the theory that everything is clear cut good versus evil scenario. There is too much gray area in everything in life that could easily go one direction or the other. It was a great introduction into the discussion about Hitler and the Jews in my opinion. That period of history to me is fascinating to read about because it is so hard for me to believe that human beings would treat their fellow human beings so deplorably.

Overall Impression: Excellent discussion with great explanations throughout your piece. I am looking forward to reading the second part next.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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419
419
Review of Essay for Seekers  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Review number # 1 of week May5-11

Hi Jean-Pierre

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Essay for Seekers

First Impression: The topic was presented in an organized manner that the reader could easily follow.

What I liked: The author's discussion on the differences between Mohammed and Jesus and why.

What needs your attention: There are multiple places throughout where sentences run on and could be shortened to make your point clearer in this reader's opinion.

Favorite Parts: I enjoyed reading the differences in various approaches to religion and then the featured quotes as the conclusion.

Overall Impression: It is clear to the reader that you researched your topic and gave a lot of thought to your responses. Thank you for sharing examples of how religion can be beneificial.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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420
420
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review number # 1 of week 5/5-5/11

Hi Fyn,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: The Christmas Angel-the story version

First Impression: This story totally reflects the spirit of Simply Positive, giving joy to another as you did in this incredible story.

What I liked: The sad reality of some children's hurtful behavior, there is no sugar coating here which I truly appreciate being one of the children who was tormented by other children because of my appearance.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the punctuation and grammar look correct to me. The story flows smoothly from paragraph to paragraph with an interesting hook building to an awesome conclusion.

Favorite Parts: How the crowd split so she could see the angel on the tree top, lovingly carved by Nicholas. His gesture demonstrated to the masses that saw their ignorant behavior and wanted them to leave her alone. She was an angel worthy of love and respect.

Overall Impression: An emotional and thought provoking story that reminds us how important compassion is and how cruel life can be because of situations beyond our control. Thank you for sharing such a motivating piece that speaks volumes.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



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421
421
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Review number # 9 of week 4/28-5/4

Hi Jessica,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: A Sports Trip to Remember

First Impression: I was nervous for you initially having the bus driver indicating you were from the same area. It isn't always a good thing to give out personal information. I am glad your case it worked out so well.

What I liked: I enjoyed how your story unfolded, it felt like I was going on the adventure with you step by step.

What needs your attention: Nothing, I did not note any grammar or punctuation errors that distracted me as I read. Nor did I actively seek to edit your story I read it for sheer enjoyment.

Favorite Parts: The Milwaukee Brewery sounded similar to the one in Merrimack, New Hampshire that I went with my first husband on our honeymoon. There was a movie and lots of sampling of different beer flavors. It sounds to me like Dave and Rich sampled a few. I am like you not a beer fan at all.

Overall Impression: This was an engaging read, thank you for sharing your adventure. I am happy you had the opportunity to make new friends.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
422
422
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review number # 6 4/28-5/4 of week

Hi Timtu

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Hanging by a Thread

First Impression: Wow, so much to take in and process so I read it three times. I am glad I did.

What I liked: The story of Dionysius opening the piece planting a seed of inspiration as your work evolved into a thought provoking entry,

What needs your attention: Nothing, I did not note any grammar or punctuation errors to distract me as I read. It flowed smoothly and was very informative to this reader.

Favorite Parts: The explanation following Dionysius's legend how we are controlled by our usage of valuable resources without thinking about the risks involved. The cycle you described so vividly could easily happen while we are so wrapped up in our personal enjoyment. The imagined blade suspended over my head certainly encouraged thought. Maybe we should install one over every leader in the world's desk so they actually take their leadership seriously.

Overall Impression: This was very written, the topic inspired thinking outside the box which is important to our survival. Thank you for encouraging me to think as well about how I use the resources available around me.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure! Good luck with the Quills.
Lyn



For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
423
423
for entry "insomnia
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Review number #2 of week 4/28-5/4

HiRhyssa,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Insomnia

First Impression: You captured exactly how it feels battling insomnia in this poem.

What I liked: I love the stanza beginning with dancing the rituals, we are creatures of habit.

What needs your attention: Nothing, you captured the prompt beautifully.

Favorite Parts: The kaleidoscope inside the eyelids, oh I definitely can relate.

Overall Impression: Another great piece, you set a very high bar in this competition.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
424
424
Review of Nature's Will  
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Review number # 5 of week 4/14-4/20

Hi

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Nature's Will

First Impression: I felt like I was captured in the whirlwind with the fragile petals struggling to hold on to themselves with your climatic story.

What I liked: How you introduced the struggle immediately so the reader experienced the exhaustion with them to the end.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the prompt was covered in an smooth flowing freestyle.

Favorite Parts: The suns rays peeking over the evergreens after the fierce storm. The words chosen enhanced the story immensely, sweeping the reader into the eye of the storm with the fragile petals.

Overall Impression: The imagery carried the reader from stanza to stanza leaving her wanting to know if all survived after the volatile storm.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
425
425
for entry "Despondent Daffodil
Review by Lyn's a Wit...
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Review number #4 of week 4/14-4/20

Hi Lchichra,

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Despondent Daffodil

First Impression: I felt so sad for the daffodil being left behind for the random visitor to see.

What I liked: I loved that she still tried to make a difference before her time passed. It is not easy to be the one carrying the weight of the world.

What needs your attention: Nothing, the despondent story unfolds beautiful in the reader's mind with the imagery created by the narrator. You responded to the prompt perfectly!


Favorite Parts: I loved the image of a candle in the window telling her it is time to go, she doesn't have to pretend to smile anymore.

Overall Impression: Very nicely told from the daffodil's point of view. I enjoyed your poem immensely!

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn



For Members Of SIMPLY POSITIVE.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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