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1,473 Public Reviews Given
1,527 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest and encouraging
I'm good at...
Proofreading for grammar, letting you know which areas of your writing work and which might be improved
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, historical, adventure, sci-fi
Least Favorite Genres
Murder, horror, erotica
Favorite Item Types
I’m happy to review all types of item
I will not review...
Anything with graphic violence, sexual content or profanity
Public Reviews
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This story is full of the beauty and timeless magic of traditional elven tales. The loveliness of the descriptions held me in awe, as befits a story about a beautiful elven queen and her realm. The language use is formal and archaic, adding to the effect of the story. This is a well-written, interesting and easy to follow read.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
This is a nicely written and inspiring piece that foregrounds the importance of writing. It shows how writing can have a vital place in society today and how it can capture the spirit of our times. I liked the discussion of books related to other forms of media, like movies, and how writing relates to politics.
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Review of One Last Request  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This poem is beautifully written and emotional - it brought tears to my eyes. You enter the thoughts of an elderly pet passing on with a compassionate touch. The poem would comfort many people on losing a beloved pet, I feel. I also imagine it was a comfort to you to write this as I find writing helps when I miss the first dog in our family.
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Review of Black Locust  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love this story about Laura who reads minds, teleports objects and adjusts the temperature of the air around her. She is a cool character and having her having to hide her abilities is a great way to create tension as she goes about life as a normal teen shopping for a Hallowe'en costume.
The appearance of the thief was nicely handled with the fear building as her first attempt to disable him is thwarted by him pulling out another weapon and grabbing a child. Thankfully she focused her powers to defeat him.
There are some neat descriptions here e.g. 'turned the knife in the corpse of their friendship.'
The ending is great as we realise shopkeeper Ted knows someone in his shop has special powers but he isn't sure who just yet. It keeps readers wanting to find out when and how Laura's powers are discovered as they nearly were here.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a nice mix of a kind of Harry Potter story where one kid must rescue another in a scary enchanted forest, and the tale of Hansel and Gretel. Here Gretel has become a witch, which is a great twist on the tale. As in the fairytale, Elena attempts to push the witch into the fire. When this doesn't work she shoots her. The mix of dialogue and action was nicely done and the story felt immersive.
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Review of Christmas Wreath  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
A lovely couple of poems. They show how a subject about a wreath can be differently interpreted. The first poem is an emotional story about an army wife missing her husband at Christmas. Then in a lovely twist he returns home for Christmas after she thought him missing. The second poem is cute and festive and full of the joys of Christmas with children waiting for Santa.
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Review of Storm Music  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem has an incredible sense of vitality and movement. Even the form of the lines mirrors the shape and movement of a tornado. I enjoyed the analogy between stormy weather and whirling thoughts. The use of imagery is beautiful and varies from fearful 'eddies of dust and debris' to brighter images of 'spring-green grasses.'
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
What a heartwarming Christmas story about the love of family and pets transforming the life of a sick girl. I loved Jade and wanted her to get well so it was nice to see her recover after so difficult a diagnosis at a young age. The miracle kitten, Hope, transformed her life and she got better and became an artist. The story has lovely festive details and was a fun read.
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Review of First Day  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (4.5)
This story is well-written and enjoyable to read. It conveys a sense of comedy well and I laughed over the part where the main character only managed to mow one lawn after steering it disastrously, and the ending where the power gets knocked off in an attempt to perform a lamp assembly job that even a 'fairly intelligent monkey' could do.

'errands' is a little abrupt here, maybe make it 'ran errands' - 'I’d babysat, mowed lawn, errands.'
I'd also like a bit more detail about the damaged caused by the lawnmower disaster to make this part even funnier.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a dramatic, intense and romantic piece and I’m not surprised it was chosen to feature in the romance newsletter. The setting of the historic lighthouse was evocative and perfectly described. This interesting and moody setting made me want to read on and set the tone for this paranormal romance. Damian comes across as an attractive man with unusual features about him that create interest, such as his unusual coloured eyes. This made me want to read on to discover more and prepared the way for the revelation that he is a 150 year old werewolf who has been waiting to find a mate - Audrina. The modern setting and details that can be related to, like treating illness and shopping for groceries, keep the tale grounded and believable.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
Well done on getting this wonderful poem published- you deserve it! It reminds me of children’s stories I read told in poetic for where kittens get up to naughty antics. I enjoyed the theme of witches and the appropriately witchy names of the kittens. This will surely appeal to children. The poem has a lovely flow and is an amusing piece that brought a smile to my face as I read it.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
I loved this moving story about the love of a mother for her son. Abha sees Paavo as precious and would do anything to make him happy, including selling her hair to buy him a bicycle. Although short, this story immersed readers in Abha's world and packed in a lot of emotion. I felt so sorry for her trapped in poverty working with raw fingers on making brooms under the strict orders from her boss.
The opening lines captured my attention and summed up the key motivation of the story. You present Abha's thoughts in a way that is realistic and easy to relate to.


Here you have an exclamation mark and a comma, so one needs to go. Also, I wondered if you might just put 'He stomped away' afterwards as it's obvious this is the boss's speech from the quote marks: "Work faster!," he said and stomped away.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a wonderful poem. The choice of words give it a musical feel and I felt drawn into the wintry scene. The family battling to survive in hostile elements was an emotive theme that drew me on. The poem reinforced the importance of faith and prayer as the father prays they will be able to get through the harsh winter. I like the air of mystery as we don’t know who the family are or when the poem is set, although to me it has a historical feel and made me think of America’s first Christian settlers.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This is a beautifully written romantic poem. It captures the mood of romance and longing for a time, place and person to return perfectly. Music can be very evocative so it worked well having it trigger a memory. Your choice of descriptive words make the Spanish bar come alive and sound a perfect romantic setting. The use off rhyming couplets worked well at adding to the musical effect.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
I read this because I recently watched 'Twilight' for the first time. As we like the same movies and stories, I thought I would enjoy it! I can see why you like it so much and I'm looking forward to the next movie. Jacob wasn't in the first movie as much as he sounds to be later on, but he was cute and I agree I'd probably have chosen him even though I'm not a Native American - I think Native Americans have amazing cultures and histories, plus I love wolves! The vampire society in the film was memorable and well thought out. I love the atmosphere in the way they shot the movie and revealed things gradually. Rosalie sounds to make an interesting character arc and it's nice Bella and Edward have a little girl who helps Rosalie out of her sadness.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
I like the way you centred this poem on the character of the innkeeper’s wife. She’s often overlooked in art and writing relating to Christ’s birth, so I found it an original and interesting idea to narrate this from her viewpoint. The part where she is unable to sleep, hears angelic singing and wishes she had gone further to help Mary and Joseph rather than just offering them a stable was excellent. It is a sermon in itself as we often wish we had done more in Christ’s cause after an event so the feelings of the innkeeper’s wife are relatable.
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Review of Surprise  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a tense piece that had me hooked as drama unfolds. Beaoul is a hell-hound who not only can speak but also has more emotional intelligence and empathy than most hell-hounds. Here, the sides with a woman who is held prisoner and helps her escape, even if it means Beaoul defying her mistress Mira Black. I liked the contrast between Mira complaining over a broken fingernail and the poor prisoner enduring horrendous torture as it shows just what a villain Mira is and how little she thinks of others. I'm interested to hear what a neutral Middle of Everywhen entity is.

You capitalised whispered here by mistake: out of here," Whispered the prisoner
There should be a full stop instead of a comma at the end of the dialogue here: You need to go," The woman gasped for breath.
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Review of The Dance  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I saw this piece advertised in the Fantasy unicorn theme newsletter. As a lover of unicorns, the magical incident that the grandmother relates to her grandchild enthralled me. Some of the descriptions, such as the unicorn hoofs sounding like the bones of the earth and the water so cold it burns like fire are incredible and original. The story was well-written and easy to follow. It may have been simply a tale to entertain a fanciful grandchild, except for the wonderful ending where the grandmother points to the nodule on her forehead that is a reminder of the time she danced with unicorns.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
This pirate story is full of action, twists and turns. I liked the style of writing as a journal and you did a great job of entering Olivia’s head. I was cheering for her and I was pleased she and Cyrus got together after a slow start to their romance with Cyrus hiding his feelings.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
This poem made me really feel for the poor princess locked in the dungeon. I felt like I was there in the dark listening to the rats and the distant footsteps of the guards! I'm pleased her heroic knight in shining armour was there to rescue her. I loved the part where he arrives on his black horse to ride away with her. She is a lucky girl going to Unicorn Island - having read some of your stories about the island I know it is a magical place.

In the first line you put two 'in' by mistake, the first one should be 'is': 'in in the dungeon'
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Review of The Wheel  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
What I liked best:
I loved the way you adapted folklore from Greek and Celtic legends about the changing seasons. You begin the poem referencing Demeter, and the notion of the harvest goddess is carried through to the part where you describe the summer and autumn seasons and their fruitfulness. However, in the references to the Crone and the names of the different times of year, Celtic folklore comes across strongly.
The notion of the seasons personified in the lives of a woman and her husband is an excellent one and draws the poem together well. I enjoyed the sense of coming round full circle at the end as the woman dies giving birth to a daughter in her old age, as her mother did. This not only symbolises the repetitive circling of the year, but also introduces emotions of loss, closure and new hope that are felt as winter turns to spring.
The refrain at the end of each section where you repeat the names of the different times of year give the poem a wonderful song-like effect.

Some suggestions:

I found these two lines a little confusing as I wasn't sure what was going on. Maybe revise these to tease out their meaning in a clearer fashion for the reader?
'Before flows passed from Mother ceases
Begin to gather all the pieces'

You don't need to capitalise and here: 'Lord And Lady slow their pace'

I feel that a full stop should end the poem here to give a sense of closure, or perhaps try an ellipses to create a sense of going back over time as the wheel turns again: 'Give the wheel another turn'

For readers unfamiliar with folklore, I wondered about adding a glossary at the end of the poem explaining the terms you use e.g. the beliefs surrounding Yule, Imbolic, Oestra, Beltain, Litha, Lughnasadh, Mabon and Samhain, plus a little about the Crone goddess and Demeter myths that you reference?


Thanks again for the enjoyable read. If you're interested in folklore, you might like to check out some of my blogs about the folklore inspiration for my fantasy writing: https://hollymerryauthor.wordpress.com/blog/


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Lyrical Minds  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was a nicely put poem about the value of songs in our daily lives. The reminder that song-writers, like poets, play with the music of words, is a great theme to choose for a poem. This piece is well composed and expresses its meaning in a clear and thoughtful way. I especially liked the idea of writers being inspired 'from above.'
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
What a cute teddy bear - I've never seen one with purple fur before. He's a very handsome and unusual bear and fits the name Prince very well with his 'Purple Rain' fur. He is a lovely gift from your husband and clearly a special and well loved bear. This piece is nicely written and it's easy to understand what the bear means to you.
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Review of Sleeping  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I loved the idea that Sleeping Beauty would be tired of dreaming all the dreams it is possible to dream, and that she has forgotten what colour the sky is. These ideas are very apt and original.
The butterfly section reminds me of Alice in Wonderland. It was neat how you transformed what Luna thinks is a butterfly to a prince who luckily knows CPR. I loved this realistic twist on the kiss of life!
I enjoyed the story of the prince being a modern man unwittingly conveyed to the castle. The dialogue about the destiny detector was hilarious! I can see Luna is keen for the happy ending with her reluctant prince, but this story might also the the start of a longer one before they get together. I think all good short stories have the potential to be part of something more.
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Review of Haste And Hurry  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
Autumn is my favourite season so I loved this piece. The autumn colours are lovely at the moment!
I love the rhyming word choice and how you’ve conveyed a sense of movement using words like scurrying, flurrying, bustling and flustering. This creates a sense of how busy nature is at this time of year, especially in windy weather when leaves, chestnuts and even branches blow. I like how you prelude winter with the idea of wood for sledges.
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