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377 Public Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)

Hello ♥hOOves♥

I have been reading "Heart's Dream - For Ollie

In order to put your poem in context I went to your port and read 'Sara's Port chapter eight.' I love the way you have written it from the heart's point of view and the way the feelings are expressed. So romantic.
A beautiful poem, I enjoyed reading it.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Maryann

I have been reading "The Magnitude of Stars

Your poem has excellent rhyme and although there is no set syllabic count it flows quite well. It is a delightful poem and my thoughts were that it could have been made longer. The words you used were very descriptive and I wanted to read more.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Storm-story  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Fyn

I have been reading "Storm-story

And here's me complaining about a couple inches of snow! I'll stick with our English climate any day. I enjoyed reading this piece and had to remind myself that it was fiction; you made it seem so realistic. It was very descriptive and there is nothing that I would alter.
Congratulatios for the 12th *Smile*

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Girls Night Out  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello Diane

I have been reading "Girls Night Out

I loved this, I loved the humour in it. It was easy to visualise a 'girl's night out' and you kept the reader interested and at the same time managed to get a good number of book titles incorporated into it.
There is nothing I would change except this piece - couldn't be any (more) bizarre than
An enjoyable read.

Wrte on!

~Sue~

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5
Review of the golden genie  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello troubador

I have been reading "the golden genie

What a wonderful and descriptive write. My mind said 'Paris' almost from the start of the poem. I have only been there once but it made such an impression on me. So much history and beauty in its heart.
An excellent poem, I really enjoyed reading it.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello Happytobealive-Cissy

I have been reading "It's Not for me to Question

Before I read it I went to your port and read "My Story of BPD to understand the person behind the poem a little more. You have gone through so much in your life and you sum it up in your poem. Thank you for sharing your thoughts with us, I have no suggestions, there is nothing I would change.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of 229 Years Later  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello Lou

I have been reading "229 Years Later

What excellent sentiments. The meaning of so many things we celebrate seem to have been lost over the years. You cite Independence Day in your poem; I feel much the same about Easter and Christmas where the real reason for celebrating loses out to commercial values. By all means enjoy - but remember the reason for the celebration. (Okay - I'm getting off the soap box now - lol)
I loved your poem.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Without You  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Rachel

I have been reading "Without You

I thought that your rhyme was good and I'm sure your friend must be special for you to write this poem for him/her.
The first two verses have a regular syllabic count 6-6-8-6 which make the poem flow well; in the last two verses the count alters to 6-5-4-5 and 7-6-6-7.
Although your poem is above average I feel that a balanced count would make it even better.
If you do alter it let me know and I will re-rate it. Well done.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Sassy  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hello warriormom

I have been reading "Sassy

I am reviewing this story from a reader's point of view. I think that you have made a good start but there is room for expansion. Perhaps a little more background information on your charachters. Your idea to turn this into a series of stories about Sassy is good and I look forward to seeing it progress.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Pain Pain Go Away  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello NanoWriMo2018 Into the Earth

I have been reading "Pain Pain Go Away

You are so right in what you say. There is nothing funny about the 'funny bone!' I found your article interesting as I had not heard of T.O.S. I have Fibromyalgia which is also a nerve pain so I understand what you are saying. Over the years I have developed ways of dealing with the pain - it might get me down at times but I won't let it beat me! *Bigsmile*
I noticed no errors in your article, it was an informative read.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Earning It All  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Joy
I have been reading "Earning It All

What a good short story. You kept me guessing right up to the end - which is what a mystery story should do. I thought it was well told and it held this reader's attention all the way through.

I saw no spelling or grammatical errors.


Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of The Old Mill Road  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Eiji

I have been reading "The Old Mill Road

I really enjoyed reading your poem. It had good rhyme and the rhythm made it flow really well.
Reminiscences of how things used to be! We used to hear the clatter of clogs as the weavers made their way to work in the cotton mills but all that has gone now; all that remain are the defunct mill chimneys.
I noticed no errors. There is nothing I would change.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of The Hunter  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello billwilcox

I have been reading "The Hunter

I think we all have met a Cletus Brooks at sometime in our life! Whether we would all take such drastic measures to get rid of him is another question.
This sent a shiver down my back, probably because the 'hunter' seemed so cold and calculating!

Well written, descriptive and scary.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)

Hello Cleveland

I have been reading "The Eighth of November, 2008

This is an excellent free verse poem. It is so very vivid and delightfully descriptive. I love the use of enjambment; it draws the reader on through the poem. You write beautifully!
I have no suggestions, there is nothing I would change.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello WHISPERER

I have been reading "The Day Of My Life

It is a beautiful poem with good rhythm and rhyme. I like the way you have compared a lifetime with the space of one day. I certainly look back and wonder where all the years have gone!
I enjoyed reading your poem.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of The End  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)

Hello mumto5

I have been reading "The End

You requested a helpful review on the 'items to review' page. The following are just my thoughts on your poem, I hope you find them useful. Use or discard them as you wish :)
Though the content is sad, poetry is a good way to express feelings. Your rhyme is generally good except where you have used the same word e.g. verse seven rhymes day with day. Have you considered using rhythm in your poem? I think a poem flows much better if it has a consistent syllabic count. I have played with your first verse and made it a 10-10-10-10 syllabic count, see what you think.

When I look back on all those many times,
And think of all the dreams I've left behind,
I now know there was nothing else to do.
I had to turn and walk away from you.

You have the basis of a really good poem with just a little time spent on improving the syllabic flow. I hope this has been of use to you, please let me know if I can be of any help.

Whatever you do,

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello Eiji

I have been reading "Where the Blue Forest Grows

What can I say? Wow! You took the prompt and ran with it. This poem had everything, dungeons, blood, evil villains, a princess and a rescuer on his armoured steed. Good overcame evil at the end - or did it?
You gave it a twist at the end!

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Ambience  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello jaya

I have been reading "Ambience

I am mainly a traditional rhyming poet but I can appreciate good free verse. I think your poem is absolutely beautiful. It has a wonderful sense of feeling and it draws the reader along. It has a sense of peacefulness about it.
There is nothing I would change.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Burden of Guilt  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello Eiji

I have been reading "Burden of Guilt

What an excellent ghazal. I enjoy reading and writing them and I have to say that yours are very, very good. You entered three in
POETRY IN RHYME - RHYTHM CONTEST-winner  (E)
A monthly contest for formal poetry in rhyme and meter.
#1017054 by Dr M C Gupta
and all were placed - Well done. They were written in your inimitable style, very descriptive. ( Remind me never to upset you *Bigsmile* )

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of Hallow's Week  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)

Hello Eiji
I have been reading "Hallow's Week

Congratulations - it was well deserved. I don't know about you but I think I'm ready for Christmas poems now lol.
Mind you I still have to face Friday night yet but I can tell you that I won't be going anywhere near Pendle hill *Shock*
This was another very visual poem, well done.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Maria Mize

I have been reading "IT HIT IN THE SPRING OF 1969

What a good format this poem has. I love the way it uses internal rhyme along with end rhyme. I imagine it must be pretty scary to be faced with extreme weather; here in England we get plenty of rain and wind but rarely anything as bad as you get over there.
Your poem tells a story and I enjoyed reading it.
Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of CAST A SPELL  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hello COUNTRYMOM-JUST REMEMBER ME

I have been reading "CAST A SPELL

Isn't it good how one prompt can bring forth so much variety. I love your delightful white witch with her sugarplums and chocolate. (I'm a chocaholic) Coming from an area rife with folklore I am more used to the blackhearted witches of Pendle. (I think in all honesty they were victims of the era they lived in)
I enjoyed your poem

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Oldwarrior

I have been reading "My First great gift

This brought so many memories back to me. The eldest of five girls, I was lucky as I always had first pick of hand-me-downs from the 'well off'.' Mother used to spend hours sewing or unpicking old woolens and rolling multicoloured balls of wool which she would then knit up into 'rainbow' jumpers for us. Father kept a few chickens which he would sell to the 'well off,' we made do with stew made from the giblets! Oh happy days!
Times were hard, I felt your hurt.

Write on!

~Sue~

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Review of WHAT'S TRUE LOVE?  
Review by ~Sue~
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Khalish

I have been reading "WHAT'S TRUE LOVE?

What's true love, does it exist? Well, being a romantic at heart I'd have to say yes! Your poetry is always so good that I hesitate to find fault with it but I have one or two suggestions re. this one. They are only suggestions and I know that you will take them in that light.

In the second stanza may I suggest that you reverse they even to even they to keep the flow.

In the last stanza sought and got do not rhyme well. eg. sought /bought got/hot
You could possibly substitute 'got' with 'bought' without losing the meaning of your poem.
Whatever you do please,
Write on!

~Sue~

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Review by ~Sue~
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello kip

I have been reading "The Shades of Willow's Creek

I tend to read poetry more than stories but I am glad I stopped to read this. I am reviewing it for it's content rather than for grammar etc. As a reader I thought that your story was excellent. You had me hooked from the start. You set the scene so well that I had no problem seeing or feeling what you were describing.
For me, it was so well written that I could have been reading it from a published book.
Although I wasn't looking for errors I did spot one typo four lines from the end of chapter two - peaded/pleaded :)
Excellent work.

Write on!

~Sue~

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