*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/normajeantrent/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8
Review Requests: ON
406 Public Reviews Given
473 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
I like to give friendly advice that I hope will help, not harm.
I'm good at...
I enjoy picking out spelling mistakes. Bad punctuation also bothers me.
Favorite Genres
Fiction
Least Favorite Genres
poetry, fan fiction, fantasy, anything erotic or about death, gay or lesbian
Favorite Item Types
flash fiction, short stories
Least Favorite Item Types
long stories, novels, poems, lyrics. I don't write them so I don't feel as though I can review them.
I will not review...
Anything erotic or with cruelty to people or animals. I will not review anything dealing with the gay/lesbian lifestyle.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 -8- ... Next
176
176
Review of Fibonacci Awake  
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Nice....you met the challenge head on and in a wonderful way. No problems I can see in anything! Thanks.

Stay calm and Write on!
Queen Norma Jean in Quarantine just a little while longer


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
177
177
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Fun story. I think I figured it out within a line or two, but that didn't stop me from finishing the story.

No criticisms on spelling or grammar or punctuation which I usually look at first. Good flow on dialogue.

Good job.

Write on.
Norma Trent


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
178
178
Review of Mom's Birthday  
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
You always do a good job with your flash fiction stories. This is no exception. It is hard to get a concise, readable, story with plot and place in 300 words.

There is one punctuation error, but I see no other problems.

Good job Thanks for the read.

Norma Trent


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
179
179
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I read this with a heavy heart. You can feel the hurt and rejection in your autobiographical sketch. I am not sure I would call this a short story, since this is very much a true story of your life.

Some criticisms I have are these:
Try starting each new thought with a new paragraph. That would make it much easier to read.
Make sure to proofread your story. I found several instances that the wrong spelling was used.
I find that several times the punctuation is incorrect. Again, proofreading your work will help with that.

I am sorry you had to go through this experience. But perhaps as you write, getting the pain out and on paper, or into the computer, will help purge those emotions.

Good luck and keep writing!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
180
180
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for letting me letting me review your column for the Talent Pond review challenge.

You have taken a brave step by writing for this website. But the only way to get good at writing is by writing, and by doing that every day if possible. Only by exercise do we get stronger. And that applies to writing as well as anything physical.

There were a few problems with grammar. But those problems are things you can learn by studying grammar. Your spelling seems to be fine. So work hard on perfecting technique and you will continue to improve.

Be brave, take chances, and keep writing.

Thank you for sharing.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
181
181
Review of My Old House  
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Well, this story started and ended well. Nice conflict and story flow.

But I did have a problem with the way you chose to set up your dialogue. It seemed to make the story hard to read. I think I would try giving every character their own line of dialogue. As it stands now, I had a hard time figuring out who was speaking.

There were a few misspelled words, and a few times you repeated words in the same paragraph when you could have chosen a different word to mix it up a bit.

Thanks for letting me read this as a part of the Talent Pond Review group.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
182
182
Review of Mid-Life  
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I liked this little tale. Serves him right! A Harley- Davidson is no small beast - those things weigh a ton! I don't know how anyone can manage to ride them for hours or days at a time.

Flash fiction is a favorite genre of mine. I think you hit this one just right. I don't know if you submitted it for the contest. But if not, try a contest. You just might win it.

I was, however, confused by the A-C-D-B at the bottom.

Thanks for letting me read your work.




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
183
183
Review of Untitled book  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I think this has a possibility for a interesting tale. Perhaps Fia could be lost in the woods, and have an adventure spiritually or something sci-fi.

I always liked being the woods as a child and now as an adult, love being in the mountains and the forests. But I was and am still fearful about becoming lost. So the idea of becoming lost is a great stepping off point for a story.

Thanks for letting me review your work.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
184
184
Review of Circle: Chapter 1  
In affiliation with The Talent Pond  
Rated: E | (2.0)
I have to admit I had a hard time reading this. Sometimes authors use unusual punctuation and spacing, even spelling, to give their work a unique look and feel. But in this case, this just jumbled it up for me.

I wasn't sure what I was being involved in, and what the point was of your work. I see that the genre was death and fantasy and supernatural. And I do see glimpses of those in this work. but somehow this all doesn't seem to make sense to me.

Thank you for letting me read your work.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
185
185
Review of Daring Dreams  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Good twist at the end. But I like your stories on Flash Fiction, so no criticism on the story. However one item on punctuation: 'just get it over with' instead of using ". Then should it be 'drowned'? And then maybe make that the end of that thought. Start a new sentence at 'You have got to...'.

Just some ideas.
186
186
Rated: E | (3.5)
Well. first off, there are some spelling errors I noted - "petal" for pedal - "cyprus" for cypress.

It reads okay, but I am not sure you are aware of the fact of that you probably wouldn't be able to be outside in the Everglades at night. I worked in the Everglades for a time and the mosquitoes were something you had to deal with day and night, so many! They were horrible. One could not go outside without tons of bug repellent and long sleeves and even a netted hat for protection. But you did get the effect of a swamp.

Keep on writing. Thanks for letting me review!
187
187
Rated: E | (3.5)
I am not a poetry fan, so I'll start off by stating that. I'm not familiar with the Tanka syllable count. But I guess by doing some counting, you got that part right. Seems like that would be hard to do.

So, then after the technical part of your poem is accomplished, you did a good job with rhyming and capturing an idea of Christmas.

Thank you for letting me read your work.
188
188
Rated: E | (3.5)
I'm usually not a fan of poetry. Very few poems do I understand. Your poem reads more like a story than a poem. I feel the pain of the lovers being apart.

Perhaps more of the personal life of the narrator could also be worked into the poem. We see only one side of the story here. But perhaps that is your intent? Is the narrator also working temporary jobs? or is the narrator a professional, and remembers what it is like to work your way up.

Well, anyway, thanks for the read.
189
189
Review of The Cat's Cradle  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Reads like one of those old Twilight Zone TV show plots. Weird. Was it real or was it all a dream? Hmmm.

I liked the mood and the images you gave me with those few words. A lost weekend he will be thinking about forever.

Thanks for the read.

190
190
Review of On The Beach  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
For the record, you used the 's' word twice. But I forgive you because this made me laugh. Oh my. Tough luck, girlie. You let him sleep and did not pay attention to the rising water!

I like the telling of location and character with just dialogue.

No criticism.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
191
191
Rated: E | (4.0)
Nice, warm story. I like the colors you can see in your mind's eye as you read.

Some ideas - I would change checkered board to checker. Then in that same paragraph, the rest of the line after flannel shirt seems awkward. I think you wanted that in there to lead to the next paragraph, as you do the same with the bird reference.

There are maybe a few places I would put a comma, but since this is a child thinking perhaps punctuation is not as important as in another piece? Just wondering.

Thanks for the read.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
192
192
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hi there. Just a quick note - I had notice you used three different spellings for the character's name:
Brandon
Brendan
Brendon

Just thought you'd like to know. I know when we write these stories we, at least I, do them fast! So sometimes those things fall through the cracks, so to speak.

Thanks.
193
193
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Well, I did read this story and have some ideas for you.

At the beginning, maybe leave off the reference to teenagers once you have established that they ARE teenagers. You repeat that reference sometimes back to back. Maybe use teens, or young people, friends, or some other reference.

Why are you describing the color of their clothing? It does nothing for the plot for me. I understand why you need to tell us about shorts and such.

In the part where you state 'Dr. Zack had done..Dr. Zack had created..' Maybe leave off the second Dr. Zack? just use Dr. or perhaps Dr. Z? Just an idea. It just read weird to me.

The part about the snow touching their toes with their sandals seemed out of place since we never read they were wearing sandals.

Frosty just rolls his eyes is maybe the wrong tense - should it be rolled?

These are just some notes I made as I read this story. I hope you find this useful. I like to read my stories aloud as I write. It helps me to find any strangeness in my wording or plot.

I think you have a fun idea. I look forward to reading more of your work.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
194
194
Review of Holding onto Hope  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Good inspirational story. I think you had a typo in the line "Why should...". I think you meant it to be "I" instead of "if".

Other than that, no other criticisms. Good start.





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
195
195
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Nice affirming story.

You did have a typo - in line "Why should.." I think instead of "if" you meant "I".

Other than that, no other criticisms. Good start!!!
196
196
Rated: E | (2.0)
Thanks for the read, Eric. This just seems like a memoir - was it supposed to be a short story? The story seems kind of jumpy - just throws facts at you.

The passage = "I was a snot nosed kid when world events bigger then me and my friends changed everything. The events of the world would take me to the one I would love for all of my days." = has repetitive "events and world". Somehow change the wording to have more impact.

Then there was this passage = "It was another dark night, all you could see was the night sky and all of the stars" = again you repeated night as dark night and night sky. Maybe rethink this passage to make it more meaningful.

Thanks again,
Norma
196 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 8 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/normajeantrent/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/8