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2,806 Public Reviews Given
3,474 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
True algorithm ia in response from the reviewed. Honed craft over 17 years. I see the good, with an eye to potential. Will never be/play authority of someone else’s words. That’s left to the master of the work. The artist has the vision; I just react/review, illuminate a fuller perspective to overcome challenges faced with those words. I see responses my reviews as affirming. *has references*
 
To see how I review, my feedback is public. Reviews can be set up through email. This page is limiting. *Smile* I accept review credits if I deserve rank. I accept merit badges as recognition, to be earned not bought…my opinion. I buy to support friends to maintain my shadowed equivalency, not pad. I have low vision, ADHD. it’s tripped me up. I dust off, get back in the game.
I'm good at...
Poetry, psychoanalysis. Ideas and notions on publishing process. I encourage writers with my reviews, look for strengths and give direction on how to make something better. I continue to correspond those who approach, when more to offer. I see what drives, use experience and the overarching mind, connect where each individual’s art derives. Hope to opine where it could take them with their craft. Like to believe, sometimes, before the writer knows themself.
Favorite Genres
nature, love, psychological, spiritual, inspirational, epiphany, emotional, drama, human interest, science, conspiracy, dystopian, fatalistic, speculative. Not cookie cutter fantasy realms or choose your adventure. Action/adventure. Unique, surprise.
Least Favorite Genres
Horror, fan fiction, some fantasy and sci-fi, or anything Lord of the Rings/Game of Thrones-ish.
Favorite Item Types
poetry, short story, essay/opinion/blog
I will not review...
I’m happy receive an email to discuss first. I set this to receive 9k. WDC gets the rest. No page here I know of to collectively or categorically see, compare reviewers for hire. That might be a worthy tool.
Public Reviews
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601
601
Review of ICEBERG  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I guess I should have read the description line because I went from title to text about a new Titanic being built. And then, it mentions meditation. Then, I get the parallel, but I thought most of the introduction was unnecessary. You have two different topics at work. It could take a sentence to introduce how meditation is connected to the iceberg that sunk Titanic. In fact, you could scrap the first two paragraphs and just get right into it.

While you may be attempting to sound scholarly, there are too many sentences that are difficult to read. And the love of adverbs is overabundant with 11 counted. You should aim for four or fewer in a piece this long. I'm sure you could explain this more succinctly. Is it meant as a call to action? To get people in a program to learn this technique? Otherwise, the angle should be more of a how-to.

I would edit this and be more direct.

B


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602
602
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 18+ | (3.0)
Creepy.
That's what you're going for, right? Kind of surprised by the turn this takes. Went from stalker to predatory. It's hardly erotica, except for the penner, I suppose. Animal is a better choice. Does WDC need to come up with more categories?
As poetry goes, it's a bit remedial. It's really prose or monologue to me.

B


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603
603
Review of Later  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
This isn't a poem so much as it is a sexually charged interlude between two characters exchanging humorous dialogue. When she said leave that dick here after he got out of bed to get water, I got as big a chuckle as I did when he said I can get that drink later, giving me the image of him spinning on heel and high tailing it back to bed.

This would be a great scene in film. Nicely done. Not poetry. But worth the read.

B


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604
604
Review of Candles Flicker  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Written for contest, I wondered if intended as a poem this classified, which it doesn't seem to qualify as. What I see is poetry that begins well but through some unusual word combinations confused me. Quite possibly just needed better punctuation.

B


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605
605
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I could partly understand what was happenening with the introduction to what is described as a future sci-fi novel. It seems a storm has sparked memories of childhood when being told by strange police that her parents had died in a vehicular mishap on a bridge. What is less understandable is how this storm conveys images of a grandparent who I assume also dies.

I struggle with past and present tenses, only because it is used too much. I try to imagine something supernatural at work here, but cannot grasp what that may be. I cannot decipher what is being set up.

Are the storms real or imagined, a part of the mind or just a device to show how the storms are like what psychologically rages? I was intrigued and want to get a clear picture. Perhaps more is coming?

Write on,

B


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606
606
Review of The Flawed Gods  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
This is labeled a short story but seems too broad in scope to be anything less than a novel. I'm introduced to a character that is immortal with god-like powers but lacks the mental capabilities to control himself in murderous, vigilante escapades.

I wasn't sure what to make of where you want to take this. Obviously incomplete, it lacks a storyline, containing several vignettes and a lot of introspect about how being an outlaw vigilante makes him feel awkward and alone.

Liked the introspect, though it goes on a bit. Needs more focus and less internal monologuing. I think description of him would help, explaining relationship with her and liked direction to seek a mentor to help himself get the perspective he needs. Though, after many centuries, got to believe it's not going to happen for him.

Best of luck with this. I see potential if you can figure out what you want to do with it.

B


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607
607
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
This was definitely a humorous piece, described as a short story. Though, I find it is a collection of musings and reactions to a particular situation that has humorous elements.

You open the story by describing your new situation, needing to walk in the morning while it is still dark before work. Funny that the big dog is too scared to go out with you. What follows is a string of thoughts about what you might encounter in this dark as you venture out.

Some of the funniest stuff included: it was too scary for muggers to be out, imagining them home safe in bed; That your Italian neighbor is so hairy it's scary.

There is something about the dark that works on our imagination and it gives one a lot of thought based on the horror movies we've seen, etc. The things you should not do like say "who is there?"

Somehow it always comes back to us and we wonder if someone is out to get us. So the dark really works on our superstitious meanderings. And I liked how you ended the story seeing the old neighbors skinny-dipping for their 60th anniversary. The irony is that the real horror was having to witness that.

I thought you had some really great sentence structure and unique thoughts that were funny. I believe as a story it lacked a lot of the elements, structurally. It was more of a monologue or like stand-up comedy routine material.

Good job,

B


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608
608
Review of True Perseverance  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
I see this poem as having some good expressions, but confuses nonetheless. It does speak somewhat darkly of a world going to seed.

I was struck by the opening lines, "I see the shallow waters dividing apart and all of the things that once existed in my heart." Unfortunately, that is where the poem ends for me because it takes an unusual turn. This poem starts to speak of world domination. There is awkward sentences and fragmented sentences and it doesn't really sound like a poem.

And in the end it says we all have a serial killer inside of us. So this really could be absurd rantings of someone who's probably left this website a long time ago. So take it for what it's worth.

The palm just seems to be grasping and meandering and really doesn't say anything.

Just a few thoughts I had while reading.

Brian


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609
609
Review of If Not For You  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I misread the title once, and thought it said, I'm Not For You. But indeed, a poem above that is about discovering our self worth with the help of another.

The poem does not tell how this transformation manifested. I have concerns. Do we love ourself because someone else loves us? And, if that love is taken away...? You see my meaning?

Either way, the poem is telling. A reader can glean a sense of what this is, whether intended or not. I think it's a wonderful ode to another.

B


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610
610
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
This poem has a good construct even though a cliche expression drove the machine.

Poetry should create new expressions instead of the old heart on a sleeve. I do get the sentiment and the poem is effective, despite. The poem showed proper progression. But, this man is not well defined. We do not know why he behaves this way. What has he been through?

Just thoughts that come to mind.

B


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611
611
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Short and to the point, this poem delivers a direct message about shared reality. Are we leaving it all up to chance? Destiny, I get. But, free will suggests we don't need the coin to decide our fate.

Why is each boiled down to an idea? It's more of a notion versus that which we cannot control...as with a coin. I think you are on to something here, just not certain if it synced.

B


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612
612
Review of The Hero's Abyss  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I don't know if your poem follows form, but noted alliteration and a double-spaced construct. The expressions bordered on the ordinary and could have used better metaphors/depictions about life's struggles. The keeping your head above water type stuff is overdone.

In fact, this seems it could open for something longer. I think you haven't really started. Perhaps, write more?

B


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613
613
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I read with interest a poem about robotics, hoping to comprehend a theme about mortality. But as I read I saw your poem was difficult to meter and rhyme, though a good effort made. It's disappointing too that the poem requires a glossary.

Poetry is meant to be felt through expressions. I think the opening instruction on voice was helpful. I couldn't decide if the theme was dehumanization or insulating one's emotions to survive.

I think if you use your glossary instead of the actual words, it might make more sense. But, it might lose meaning.

Just a few of my takeaways.

B


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614
614
Review of Glass  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.5)
There are some intriguing expressions here to describe what I assume is an ordinary drinking vessel. The last two lines were most powerful:

Like moths crooning a filament;
Like angels sinning to repent.

I think you could tighten this up more, removing 'like' and eliminate the awkward semi-colon:

Moths crooning a filament
Angels sinning to repent.

Maybe, indent those lines to really consider your expressions, independent of one another. You could introduce those words at the end of the line above with a hyphen. Makes the whole piece more fluid.

I'd explore those expressions individually in other poems. They are strong themes you could explore more closely. I liked the visual representations within.

Nicely writ,

B


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615
615
Review of Water  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This cinquain poem offers some decent expressions about water. This simplistic form follows the syllable construct, without rhyming as intended. The form really doesn't lend itself to scintillating word art, but you have found a way to give it function.

The expression transparent gold was strongest. The rest of the poem offers examples as to why. I think you did a good job with this one.

B


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616
616
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Well, there are elements of a story here and sort of an essay on grumpy old men that meanders. Truly, you label monologue, but it seems to want to spin a yarn.

What I caught is this theme of dehumanization. We never really know one another, take the time, assume the worst about everything and everyone instead of giving people a chance.

The elements that work is this kind of neighborhood and the people/neighbors in it. A lot of inconsiderate people. Makes me think we should all take time to get to know one another, maybe we wouldn't push boundaries.

This is not structured well enough for story, but well meaning enough as an op-ed type piece. As monologues go, not good enough for stand-up. It could serve as the basis for a sit-com, but overdone.

Good Luck,

B


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617
617
Review of Not Me  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Poetry doesn't have to be a complicated art form, as I find here simple expressions for the way one feels. I took a look at some of your other writing and see a beginner at work. Toughest part is getting the words out on the page and you've done that. I think going forward, reading as much poetry as you can will benefit your style. Find words that read and sound the best to you. You might find you will emulate These works if you are meant for poetry. But, by all means, keep writing and experiencing what you feel. Discover during this process.

Good Luck,
B


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618
618
Review of Autumn leaves  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I enjoyed the nature aspect and sentiment of your fall-themed haiku. I think some attribution and reducing a few redundancies would give strength and clarity to an already powerful expression.

I tumbled over the first five syllables because I was uncertain about 'lost' as a verb, adjective or what? I wasn't sure where the action was.

The second line doesn't need 'sing songs' as either or neither will do because we can imagine wind sound as mourning. You do want to make it sound sweet, bittersweet I assume hence musicality.

The last line I wasn't sure who 'she' is. Nature, fall, the wind, the poet? And does she 'celebrate' doom? Sounds evil now, doesn't intone message. But it was the first haiku, but maybe worth revisiting? I see potential.

B


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619
619
Review of Daffodils Haiku  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
This is a sweet and simple haiku about daffodils that with some maturation could become a more impactful expression.

Simple words can be very effective as writers like Hemingway have shown, but avoid weak verbs like 'are' or filler like 'the' when writing a thing that depends on every syllable to evoke a message as beautiful as the blooms you write about.

'Suddenly warmer' is effective but the second line could really pop with a strong verb and/or adjective. Even the word 'first' might be wasted as we can assume they are just arriving...the word arrive might give it more cachet.

'Quietly' could move up to second line as the needed adjective/adverb. The final line could say something about this experience. I think bees or butterflies or children clutching or smelling.

Just some things to ponder about, as I have.

B



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620
620
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I read this haiku with some interest wondering what the poet's definition of zebra might be. I could not comprehend the meaning.

You follow line and syllable rules for the Japanese poem form, not sure if the aspect of nature or last line statement were fulfilled. The repitition of zebra necessary, given the truncated form?

For a reader to appreciate what you express, perhaps a clearer message.

B


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621
621
Review of How Like Kites  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Let me try this again as an unaffiliated reviewer, in the sense that my perspective has changed on this and I might be able lend more insight without the precedent restraints of group awareness.

I'm affiliating this review as a member of the WDC Angel Army.

Dear peach ,

"How Like Kites" is a nice title for a poem that could explore a very worthwhile metaphoric or personified image of kites as people.

Your poem breaks out of the gate with:

"how like kites
we are..."

Okay, you got me. But, that was it? When you are in the moment and find this expression, something was revealed to you. What was the occasion, mood, moment that inspired this thought? There must have been something tangible that could have been described that would have allowed this poem lift off.

Did the poet, like the kite, run across the mind with a thought only to stop before getting the machination aloft? You can appreciate how much there really is to say about a poem that stopped short of what it could say.

What we have here now is a beautiful prompt, a bit of inspiration for other poets, writers, reviewers to imagine lending to this scene...thanks for this inspiration:

How like kites
we are
Always chasing
The invisible?
Our tail?
Into pale blue
We climb alone
Without eyes like hearts
Soaring and falling
As if seeking
Some unknown summit.

With our tail out
Carefree, prone to shift
Our position
We shove, heave
In every new direction.

We clear these
Imaginary obstacles
Seek greater
Glory, until too battered
By a life
Of hapless navigating
Hopeful, not crash, but
Float back down
To magnetic ground --
Maybe, never
Set a course again,
Safe in the boy's closet.

How like kites...


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622
622
Review of The Sirens.  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I really and fully enjoyed this read. Your storytelling through rhyme appears impeccable. The language is a bit simple, but it's good because of the type of poetry genre it befits. It is cautionary, has moral. You seem to do it effortlessly.

I saw no errors. You've crafted a fine poem. Well done,

B


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623
623
Review of The Quiet  
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I'm captured by that description line. Forget the poem for a moment: "the strength of the mind is only exceeded by its fragility." That is a stark and deep statement that is ironic and true. Well said.

The poem uses some unique expressions that made it hard for me to grasp voice, but I know it is unique and that is what a good poem needs. It's the kind of effort that needs several reads because I get more from each pass through. Great expressions, that feeling I'm inside that mind like a forest.

Fully interpreted, your poem could mean something different to each reader.

Well done,

B


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624
624
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.5)
It's a very dramatic poem that seeks mercy, understanding, acceptance. What's unfortunate for readers is we can't get close enough to the subject being dealt with that makes the poet's soul ache so.

Of course, we write to get these feelings out. It's a process of expression, seeking an understanding audience with hope of perspective. It's always the right choice to communicate like this. The reflection of ourselves in our words will actually help us see.
It's a process of retrospect that will take time and more writing, communicating to get answers, a fuller picture.

Stay true to you,

B


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625
625
In affiliation with Circumpolar Black Light Reviewer  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I was happy to read and share my thoughts on your work.

I see some opportunities with this story. I see easy fixes to give it more punch. First, get rid of passive voice, second, slow the read and shorten sentences. Make these thoughts more concise.

Overall, you have great insight and perspective. You have something very important to share from life changing experiences with sadness/depression. Dinosaur Underwear is an anthem. I'm impressed with how relatable you make this.

Keep writing,

B



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