ShelleyA~13 years at WDC's (shelleya) Reviews

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READ A NEWBIE

The Last Drive

The road never taken in the middle of the night.

The Conversation

A young teenage male has a "talk" with his lunar aler-ego.

Grief

From a large family that has begun losing members, this is my narrative of that process.

Understanding a Sailor

What it means about a U. S. Navy servicemen’s life

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Melihra Project (Graduation)

Scarlett confronts a dangerous woman

The Monocle of Mortality

A device that reveals that which otherwise can't be seen. Writer's Cramp entry.

Competition

Imagine a man is in a sports career. He falls and gets back up. He loves his sport.

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ShelleyA~13 years at WDC

Review Requests: ON

4,636 Public Reviews Given

4,671 Total Reviews Given

Public Reviews

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651

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3288077

Review of A Crime of Passion

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good dark write about the physical abuse of domestic violence. Powerful. Skillfully crafted free style metered rhyming poetry.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. Near perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. Suspenseful. Her fear, the darkness of his rage resulting in repeatedly stabbing her to death... her screams silenced. Horrific.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the repetition for emphasis of suspense. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned, write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

652

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14 days may be credited.

#3287930

Review of The Secret Tome

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.5)

MY PAPER DOLL GANG FORM POETRY CONTEST REVIEW

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about gaining understand of this secret tome. Heartfelt and introspective. A good take on the picture prompt. A well crafted free verse acrostic.

Originality/Imagination:

An original story poem about a secret book.

Content:

Content is good.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Emotion/Depth of Feeling:

Nice depth of feelings and you search for understanding and the challenge to crack the code of the writings in this book.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Nice metaphor: 'heaven's valut is open to gaze undisturbed' - very nice descriptive of looking up into the sky.

Alliteration/Assonance/Consonance:

Nice alliteration, good assonance and consonance.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. No spelling errors. Punctuation: just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis to your thoughts as well as make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Thank you for taking time to participate in my contest. Write on.

653

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14 days may be credited.

#3287405

Review of Night

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about the evening and the night sky. Lyrical and sing song. Well crafted free verse with a tinge of rhyme.

Imagery:

Imagery is nice as are the descriptives. You paint a good picture of the night sky with star shine and a full moon.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm. Just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

Tone:

Nice depth of feeling. Whimsical.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling of the magic you see in the night sky. Nice alliteration, assonance and good consonance.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

654

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14 days may be credited.

#3287397

Review of Lonely

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about being lonely. Heartfelt and introspective. Skillfully crafted free verse that is short, concise and succinct.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. You express your thoughts of not being able to find a place where you belong and the loneliness you feel being a loner... as lonely as the wind.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

655

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3287053

Review of The Writing Wizard

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers

Rated: E

| (4.0)

MY PAPER DOLL GANG FORM POETRY CONTEST REVIEW

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is fitting to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good story poem about Ethan the Wizard who is grieving for his friend. Nicely crafted free verse acrostic.

Originality/Imagination:

An original story about a wizards sorrow.

Content:

Content is good. A very nice fantasy write.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is nice; line to line transition and breaks are nicely done. Nice rhythm. Just a note, in line five of the second stanza, the last word is night and the first word in line six is night, you might want to revise your story poem slightly in these lines.

Emotion/Depth of Feeling:

Good depth of feeling. The reader can sense the sadness Eathan feels about the loss of his friend as he sat there in the darkness and from it he created starlight.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of a dark night and this special place where Eathan, this human-like being sat in contemplation.

Alliteration/Assonance/Consonance:

Nice alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Word Choice/Spelling/Punctuation:

Word choice is nice. Spelling: Please note that there is a typo in line five, should be 'nearby'.
Punctuation: Just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma and the use of a period at the end of a thought will make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

656

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14 days may be credited.

#3286778

Review of My Journal

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about journaling and how it makes you feel. Well crafted free verse poetry which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. You express the creativity that journaling gives you, how you find comfort in words; the ability to express your thoughts through plotting stories or just brainstorming. I can relate.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance. Just a note, there is a typo in line thirteen, should be 'plotting'.

Overall:

Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

657

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14 days may be credited.

#3286769

Review of As Friends

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is fitting to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good fantasy write about friendship between a maiden and unicorn. A very nice story poem. Skillfully crafted free style metered rhyming couplets.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your imagination you paint a vivid picture of this enchanted land and the creatures who inhabit it.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: aa bb cc dd ee ff gg hh. A good mix of perfect feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed with precision in this piece.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You are a very good storyteller and this story poem about this special relationship between the maiden and unicorn.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and an entertaining piece. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

658

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14 days may be credited.

#3286763

Review of Porcia

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about your cat. Skillfully crafted free verse poetry that is short, concise and succinct.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye you paint a vivid picture of the personality of your cat, her joy of the chase, her serenity and laziness resulting in purring contentment.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express your love for her very well in this piece. She seems to be a very special companion of yours.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

659

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14 days may be credited.

#3286753

Review of Who is this God I serve

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about who God is and why you serve Him. Heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free verse poetry which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm. Just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis to your thoughts as well as make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express the character of almighty God well in this piece. You express your faith in Him beautifully in this poem. I can relate to your thoughts.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the repetition for emphasis of God's loving character and power. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

660

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14 days may be credited.

#3286750

Review of Cry for the nations

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your prayer poem.

Form/Style:

A good heartfelt write and prayer about your cry for faith and spirit to be given to the nations by God. Well crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion in this supplication to God to hear the cry of your hearts. You express your fear and awe of Him who knows all mens hearts.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and nice consonance.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

661

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14 days may be credited.

#3286745

Review of Eagles

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about eagles, a beautiful creature created by God. Well crafted free verse poetry which I enjoy.

Imagery:

Imagery is nice as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of the eagle, its traits, its beauty as is soars in the sky, the power of this great bird.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express your awe and wonder about this beautiful creation of God. I can relate.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of the traits of an eagle. Good alliteration, assonance and nice consonance. Good internal rhyme in line four of stanza one (fly, high, sky).

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

662

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14 days may be credited.

#3286728

Review of Ordinary

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write that defines your thoughts about being ordinanry. A well crafted Pleiades that is short, concise and succinct. Perfect form.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm. Just a suggestion, a strategically placed comma at natural pauses will give emphasis to a thought as well as make the flow and rhythm even better in my opinion.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You describe how under-appreciated is the thing or personality that is seen as ordinary. It originates in ones perception of that thing.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance. Just a note, line six seems a bit awkard; my suggestion would be to change overcame to 'overcomes' which would make that line flow much better in my opinion.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

663

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14 days may be credited.

#3286249

Review of There Is No Author Like The Lord

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A very good write about the Lord. Lovely words of praise and adoration to Him. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Metaphor or Simile:

Very nice metaphor: 'His plume from a dove's pure white wing dipped in ink of everlasting love.' Beautiful, simply beautiful descriptive/comparison.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. Your love of the Lord and His gifts to us through His holy word inspires, uplifts and encourages us through daily life; as you say 'There is no author like the Lord.'

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a much enjoyed read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

664

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14 days may be credited.

#3286225

Review of Writer's Block

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good short write about writers block that concise and succinct. A skillfully crafted Senryu. Perfect 5/7/5 syllabic form.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of staring at your computer screen when a bug attacks the window and you lose your train of thought.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express aggravation well in this poem. Very nice aha line three with a bit of humor.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration with nice consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

665

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14 days may be credited.

#3285590

Review of Peace Of Me

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A very good write and message about blessings received from God as seen through His creation. Heartfelt. Skillfully crafted rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of a sun filled sky that is colorful; the beauty of the landscape below that gives one peace, and the love for a child who is cuddled and loved, just a few of the wonderful gifts received from God.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. Near perfect masculine end line rhyme that is executed very well in this piece.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. You express the blessings showered down upon us, gifts of God's love for what He created and the peace He has planted within us, His true gift to mankind.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a most enjoyable read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

666

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14 days may be credited.

#3285571

Review of Death's Embrace

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about the character of death. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Metaphor/Personification/Simile:

Very nice personification of death which has an embrace, he opens his arms to you and he does not discriminate.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express the personality of death and his need to embrace one in his arms forever.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of death's character. Good alliteration, assonance and nice consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

667

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14 days may be credited.

#3284993

Review of Difference of One

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about how you feel about yourself, heartfelt and introspective. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. You express your thoughts very well in this piece, your voice not being heard, almost forgotten lost amongst other voices. Yet, you express that you are one of many lonely voices that only other lonely people hear that gives solace to one another and these voices multiplied whispers your thoughts into ears of the world.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

668

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14 days may be credited.

#3284982

Review of Tumbleweeds

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good heartfelt write about your thoughts that are introspective. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of your memories that swirl across a desert land like tumbleweeds then disappear on the horizon.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Metaphor or Simile:

Nice simile: 'scratching whispers on the land like soul mates for the wind.' Very nice descriptive/comparison.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. You express your thoughts well in this piece, as though they are elusive, just out of reach as you silently pray for them to return to you.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

669

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#3284978

Review of Hate

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: ASR

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A very good write about the hate you feel. Heartfelt, powerful and introspective. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm and use of enjambment.

Metaphor or Simile:

Nice metaphor: 'in my cocoon of rage' a good descriptive/comparison of your anger.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. You express your anger and malice passionately in this piece. These feelings scare you but also comfort you because your anger revolves around this person whom you loathe.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned, write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

670

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#3284975

Review of Moonset (revised)

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about the moon. Well crafted free verse with a tinge of rhyme that is short, concise and succinct.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. Through the lens of your eye the reader sees this midsummer moon in its beauty in the sky about silhouettd mountains.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Nice depth of feeling. You express your enjoyment of this time of season and evening as you gaze at the new moon.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance. Perfect masculine end line rhyme in lines four and five (new, blue).

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

671

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14 days may be credited.

#3284968

Review of Thoughts of You

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the theme of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about your memories of someone special to you. Heartfelt and introspective. Well crafted free verse that is short, concise and succinct.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Tone:

Good depth of feeling. You express memories of this person that you do not want to think about. You want to be alone without thoughts of him. I can relate.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance with nice consonance.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

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672

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#3284957

Review of Day's End

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A very good write about the end of the day. Skillfully crafted free verse which I enjoy.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint a vivid picture of the sun as it is about to go down, the shadows that move across the sky that the reader sees through the lens of your eye.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are well done. Very nice rhythm.

Tone:

Lovely depth of feeling. You express the beauty of days end, the secrets that this time of the day holds... then suddenly darkness and evening becomes reality.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Nice alliteration, assonance and good consonance.

Overall:

Well penned and a good read. Write on.

Angel Army Signature by Kiya

673

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#3284351

Review of Japanese Poetry

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Form/Style:

A very good write about death. Skillfully crafted Japanese form poetry. A skillfully crafted Tanka, Sijo and Haiku. Perfect form.

Imagery:

Imagery is good as are the descriptives. You paint vivid snapshots of how you view death, mourning, planting seeds to flower upon a grave and the eerieness felt as the moon shines down on a crypt.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. You express your thoughts about death, the darkness of it and the sorrow coming from ones grief.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Well penned, write on.

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14 days may be credited.

#3284342

Review of Fallen

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about being 'fallen' in spirit. Heartfelt and introspective. Skillfully crafted free style metered rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Very nice rhythm.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme: abcb defe ghih jklk mnop qrsr. Every second/fourth line in stanzas one, two, three, four and six are a mix of perfect feminine and masculine end line rhyme that is executed well in this piece. Near rhyme in the second/fourth lines of stanza five.

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion about the sinfulness in your life and how you're bound to them forever whether in peace or as a prisoner to them.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good; nice use of repetition for emphasis of feeling. Good alliteration, assonance and consonance. Just a note, there is a typo in line two of your fifth verse, the should be 'to' before breathe.

Overall:

Well penned, write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

675

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3284292

Review of Heart Break Hotel

Review by ShelleyA~13 yea...

In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army

Rated: E

| (4.0)

General Disclaimer: This review reflects my opinion and is given with the intention of being constructive and encouraging. I hope you find this review helpful.

Title:

A good title that is suitable to the subject of your poem.

Form/Style:

A good write about heartbreak and end of relationship. Well crafted free style metered rhyming poetry which I enjoy.

Flow/Rhythm:

Flow is good; line to line transition and breaks are done well. Nice rhythm.

Rhyme:

Rhyme is good as is the rhyme scheme. A nice mix of near rhyme and perfect masculine end line rhyme (call, fall, wall, hall, all) that is executed well in this piece. Nice internal rhyme in line six (they, sway).

Tone:

Deep expression of emotion. You express your pain and sorrow at the end of love that results in loneliness in your 'dance' of love. Poignant.

Word Choice:

Word choice is good as is the alliteration, assonance and consonance.

Overall:

Nicely penned and a good read. Write on.

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

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