Riot's (riot) Reviews

Riot

Review Requests: OFF

1,559 Public Reviews Given

2,107 Total Reviews Given

Review Style

My reviews typically cover: initial responses, technicalities and mechanics, favorite parts, areas of improvement, and overall impression.

I'm good at...

Honesty, and finding what works versus what doesn't work. I will never give you a rating I don't think your work deserves. I am also particularly good at spotting grammatical errors and typos.

Favorite Genres

Philosophy, Steampunk, Horror, Dark, Emotional, Science Fiction, Technology, and Political Science. I'm sure there are more that I'm missing.

Least Favorite Genres

Romance, Western, Religious, and anything froufrou.

I will not review...

Chapters and Novels, unless arrangements are made prior.

351

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3207308

Review of The Ouija

Review by Riot

In affiliation with Helping Hearts members page.

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

I am a Helping Hearts reviewer. Somebody has generously gifted you some reviews, which I'll be happily filling for you.

🌕 HuntersMoon , heyas!

I think I can honestly say that I've never seen a poem of this nature, executed so well. When I saw the image at the top (which is very fitting by the way) I had no idea that this would be such a potent political poem.

To me, that was the best part about this entire poem - the fact that you actually made this into a rhyming poem, with the theme of Halloween and fright, but also pegged the economic crises so well. My favorite stanza would have to be six and seven, but I did find the introduction to be a very good tease to what this poem was all about.

Overall, I think this is simply wonderful.

Riot
You can visit the shop at any time through the main link: "Invalid Item"

352

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3207306

Review of Adult

Review by Riot

In affiliation with Helping Hearts members page.

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

I am a Helping Hearts reviewer. Somebody has generously gifted you some reviews, which I'll be happily filling for you.

🌕 HuntersMoon , heyas again!

One of the things I'm supposed to do, in filling this package for you, is to award a pink awardicon to the item that I like best. I started with the main part of your port, but realized most of the more popular work by you has already been deservingly awarded. So I found the first folder without an awardicon and clicked.

As I browsed through this port, I skimmed through some of the items inside. All I have to say is wow! I may need a cold shower.

Therefore, it's in this reviewer's humble opinion, that this is one of my favorite things from you. Not only are you graced with writing this topic well, but you have also had a lot of experience with it given the quantity in this folder.

Thank you for sharing!

Riot
You can visit the shop at any time through the main link: "Invalid Item"

353

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#3207243

Review of WDC Mom

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Ida_Matilda_Wright Help

,

When I came into your port, I stumbled across this lovely poem. I'll be honest in that the bright pink is a bit hard to read, but it wasn't so bad that it detracted from anything. I was interested in reading this poem because of your introduction that stated it was a tribute to your internet mother.

I think the introduction stanza to your poem is very well posed in that you ask the reader what a mother is. As I read what your feelings were on the matter, I agreed. I have known people like this one the site. The first two that come to my mind: SHERRI GIBSON

and GabriellaR45

... who really fit into the category of caring and loving people you mention here.

Overall, I think this is an excellent poem. I think the ending was really strong and gave closure to everything you had to say, on a large up-note.

Happy WdC Account Anniversary from all of us at "Anniversary Reviews"

354

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14 days may be credited.

#3207233

Review of Just Take The Time

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Daizy May

,

I found this to be a very simple, yet touching poem, perfect for the upcoming holidays. The fact that you did not clutter this with large and fanciful words, in my opinion, makes it better. I think that the title is very appropriate, as it is also the last line of the poem and the overall message of it. I have struggled in the past to see the optimistic parts of life - and I think you pegged them very well here. It's always a pleasure to read you.

Riot

355

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14 days may be credited.

#3206783

Review of Tulips

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Heya ~WhoMe???~

,

Just peeking in on your poem "Tulips"

from Simply Positive.

I really like this short poem that you've written. I like how it transitions through a season, from winter to spring. In my mind I imagine an artist focusing on this transition with the last line.

Awesome job!

Riot

356

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14 days may be credited.

#3206619

Review of White Case Memorial

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by stacylynn71.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the EBB Love Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

kiyasama,

I am reviewing "White Case Memorial"

- I am deeply saddened by this forum, but also highly inspired at the caring nature of those that helped create it.

When I first joined this site, I had little idea of how much I would become involved in it. As I grew to love it more and more, I realized what a really poignant part it played in my life. I suppose I never really thought anything happened to somebody's port when they passed on, until I joined a group that "rated" white-cases work.

Recently, a chat-friend passed away. She was known as RachelD on the site. Her portfolio no longer exists per her request. However, I remember when she passed away (just recently) and I remember other friends of mine who have been very close to people on this site who have passed. Reading through this forum, there are a lot of inspirational people no longer with us.

I can think of no other way to be more honorable and respectful than this forum you have created. It's from the bottom of my heart when I say that this is extremely touching.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

357

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14 days may be credited.

#3204902

Review of Me and My Worlds

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: ASR

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Hey there, Dr Matticakes Myra

!

I was browsing through your port and saw that your Anniversary was November 8th. Sorry I missed it! Seven years, wow! That's a really long time.

I really like this port and how you've arranged and themed it. The only thing I did notice though, was there's a {size} tag at the very end. I don't know if it's spaced improperly, or if you may have added an extra bracket somehow.

As for the folders inside, I think they're neatly organized. I took a quick peek at what was inside and so far I like what I see very much. Great job!

HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews"

358

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14 days may be credited.

#3203162

Review of Pink

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by stacylynn71. Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Edgar Allan Poe Fan Package! The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

So glad I checked this!

I was scouring your port to try and find something I hadn't seen before. Then I came across this folder. When I opened it I was surprised to see not one, or two, but three cNote shops. Full, too! The "You Did Well" note in "A Spoonful Of Care" is my favorite, I think. I have a thing for rainbows.

One of the things I noticed is that the introductions to your shops are decked out nearly as much as your forums and groups are! This kinda made me sad, because I was expected to be bombarded with pleasant font colors. I wasn't too disappointed though, because the images were all outstanding. I can see you're very big into anime!

Overall, I think these are some really beautiful and affordable cNotes. I think if you were to put an explanation of how they work at the top, they would be just about perfect!

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

359

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14 days may be credited.

#3203139

Review of Blue

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by stacylynn71. Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Edgar Allan Poe Fan Package! The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

Hello there, again, mARi☠StressedAtWork !

I really like how you've decorated this folder. The light blue and violet rotating letters really brings out the title and the color scheme is attractive to the eyes. The way you have your folder split up is in an easy to follow and organized fashion. The fact that you mix "impact" font with regular fonts for the links also brings out the titles more.

Overall, I think this is an excellent folder of work. I know that I have had a great time reading your work from this folder. Maybe on another glance I'll find something else I can read! Rest assured it isn't for lack of content, but rather I've rated so much from you already.

In the meantime, keep up the great work and know that you have special fans from all of us at Ink Blot authors.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

360

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14 days may be credited.

#3202930

Review of Polynesia Kiss

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE NEWBIE REVIEWE...

Rated: E

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

This poem is riddled with visual delight! I think you did a very good job. I did get stuck at one part though, in the very first line. I'm not sure what 'amberris' is. The mysterious blossom unfolding in the sudden dawn... is my favorite by far. In stanza three I smile, because you finally introduce her by something I can depict in my head. I found the second to last stanza to be extremely well written, even though it is a tiny bit longer than the rest. Wrapping it up with the two line ending, I smile. Great poem!

Riot

361

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14 days may be credited.

#3202234

Review of Panic Switch Misery

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: 13+

| (4.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

The whole twins aspect of this eerily reminds me of The Shining for some reason. I don't think it's meant to, but that's what popped into my head.

It's mentioned a lot that the person going through this doesn't really believe he's in Hell. (I think you should capitalize it, since it's being made a reality.)

Near the end I liked how you described things. Especially when you were referring to Lucifer pulling the strings. "Saw" should be capitalized though, since it's a movie title.

Overall, I felt this was pretty decent. I love the creepy vibes from it!

Riot

362

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14 days may be credited.

#3202230

Review of Muse

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

I found this short story to be wonderfully well written and articulate. I'm extremely envious of the talented way you have strung some of these words together.

Some of my favorites:

Stepping to the New Releases, his cold blue eyes raked over the holiday glut with thinly veiled revulsion.

Nibbling on a saucer-sized sugar cookie, Jess surreptitiously surveyed the store.

The menace in his baritone and icy certainty of his gaze made Jess backpedal, masking her retreat by turning to seek the warmth of the fire.

The ending of this was absolutely perfect with the quote.

Keep up the excellent work! I can offer no improvements that would do this piece any justice.

Riot

363

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14 days may be credited.

#3202218

Review of SIR TOM THUMBE

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Hey there Joy!

I really enjoyed this short story. The ending was really spectacular. I don't think you could've picked a better way to end it. The poem at the end was very clever and witty in a light hearted way.

I love the overall concept of the story, but I did feel like the ending was a bit "rushed" - maybe it was intended to be this way. There was a lot of setup and what have you in the clinic, but the end seemed like a lot of really quick blurbs on what he did before he died. Y'know?

Overall, I really enjoyed this a lot. Thank you so much for sharing it with us.

Riot

364

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14 days may be credited.

#3201432

Review of My Own Dragons

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E | N/A (Unratable.)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
He ate and drank the precious Words, his Spirit grew robust; He knew no more that he was poor, nor that his frame was Dust.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by stacylynn71.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Emily Dickinson Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

Hello there, Miranda Foix !

I'm going to veer off the normal reviews for a moment and review this folder of yours. I was immediately interested in what was in it after reading its titles. I'm very glad I looked!

Inside, I found a treasure of really nice signatures! I think my favorite is "SFWG" because of the bright golds. I really love how the birds match the text color too!

My only suggestion is to pretty this folder up like you have others. I know you can do it and it would be so much more visually appealing.

Keep up the excellent work with making images. I can't wait to see more.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

365

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14 days may be credited.

#3197302

Review of I'm A Vegetarian Vampire

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
He ate and drank the precious Words, his Spirit grew robust; He knew no more that he was poor, nor that his frame was Dust.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by NOVAcatmando .
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Emily Dickinson Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

Heyas, NickiD89 !

I am reviewing your piece, "I'm A Vegetarian Vampire"

today! I couldn't resist this tempting piece after I
read the caption. Below are my thoughts on your work.

I really think you have an excellent "hook" with this poem. The beginning immediately sets the
pace, the tone, and the overall mood. I cannot decide what I like best, but a few of the words
and phrases in this impressed me - sucking what runs beneath, sarcophagus cache and
Cherry Kool-Aid smile on my lips. I found this poem to be very image filled as I had no troubles
envisioning this pour soul rummaging around through garbage cans looking for a 'quick fix'

Overall, I think this is a delightful poem, one that many ages of people can highly enjoy. These are
the kinds of gems that I love stumbling upon in your port and others like you. The ending was just priceless.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

366

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14 days may be credited.

#3197247

Review of Waves

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: ASR

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Hello, I'm known here as Riot

. This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

I give you a lot of credit for writing such an emotional piece. I explored your folder
a little bit before I did this review in hopes it would give me a little more insight on what
prompted this. I'm so very glad that I did. My only concern with reading this is that on a first
read through it felt very cluttered and like one long run on sentence. However, that's only on a
first read-through. Going back and going slower, soaking in more of the meaning behind these and
the actual wording, I felt it was very appropriate for the things you described: heartache,
grief, being unable to breath - feeling trapped.

If you were drowning (even metaphorically) I imagine that this is how it really would feel. To me,
I didn't feel as if this was supposed to be some graceful easy flowing piece - you were instead
describing the absolute agony behind your troubles, which drove your point home really well.
Overall, I think this is a remarkable poem. I am so very glad that you've braved sharing this with
us and I look forward to reading more of your work. Thank you very much.

Write On!
Riot

367

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14 days may be credited.

#3196579

Review of The Empty Fish Tank

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
He ate and drank the precious Words, his Spirit grew robust; He knew no more that he was poor, nor that his frame was Dust.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by NOVAcatmando .
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Emily Dickinson Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

Hello there, NickiD89 ! We seem to keep running into each other. Maybe it's because you're just that awesome!

I am reviewing your piece, "The Empty Fish Tank"

today! Below are my thoughts on your work.

I really found this poem to be highly entertaining! I love the animated and vivid descriptions of this and how you keep the build up going through each line. I think you did an excellent job with setting us up with this wondering punchline at the end.

It made me laugh really hard! Keep fighting for your rights, baby!

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

368

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14 days may be credited.

#3196576

Review of My World

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
He ate and drank the precious Words, his Spirit grew robust; He knew no more that he was poor, nor that his frame was Dust.

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by NOVAcatmando .
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Emily Dickinson Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our various members.

Hello there, NickiD89 !

I am reviewing your piece, "My World"

today! Below are my thoughts on your work.

Firstly, I couldn't help but groove out to the wonderful playlist you have here. Though, I'll have to admit, I did have to throw my headset across the room because it was blaring and I wasn't quite expecting that!

I like how you have a lot of information on the page. You've told us a little bit about yourself and talked a lot of various things. Even still, it's very organized and "crisp" if you get my drift.

The eye candy is also a big plus. While you have the glittered text at the top and its animated, it isn't full with so many that it detracts from the overall theme of the page. I am also quite fond of the colors.

My only suggestion is that if I were to tweak the layout a bit, I might expand the tan background image or overlap the cyan right table over it. It could just be my browser, but there seems to be a little bit of mis-alignment.

Overall, this is a really rockin' website and very deserving of it's trophy. Awesome socks!

*grooves to Blue Monday*

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

369

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14 days may be credited.

#3196567

Review of Scream!

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by Daizy May .
I am reviewing your piece "Scream! " today.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Edgar Allan Poe Fan Package!
The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters! I'm thrilled you were
chosen for this honor!

Hello there, again, StaiNed-House Targaryen !
While rummaging your port I had to stop by and check this out. I was happy it was a poem!
I'm so glad that I did - you and your sister are masters at poetry.

My favorite part
about this poem was the candor of it all. Call it whatever you need to stay happy
you say - how true! I really also like how you take actions and things and the correlations
they resemble to other things. Great job!

I don't have any suggestions
but I do almost wonder how this would read as some sort of song. Think about it - you
have some really great lines in here. They would make some great choruses.

My overall impression
of this poem is that it's really great. I'm very impressed with the way you were
able to string such few words together and make such an impact on my emotions.

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

370

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14 days may be credited.

#3196562

Review of ~Love thy self.

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Congratulations on your recent nomination to "Ink Blot Hall of Fame" by Daizy May . I am reviewing your piece "~Love thy self." today.
Along with your nomination, you are also receiving the Edgar Allan Poe Fan Package! The package includes a total of 9 reviews from our FAN - ATIC gifters! I'm thrilled you were chosen for this honor!

Hello there, StaiNed-House Targaryen !
Whew! What a hot read!

My favorite part
is all the innuendos, hidden meanings behind what you are really saying and what it is really meaning. I think you do
a truly remarkable job at this, in spite of its nature.

My only suggestion
is that I stop goofing up my templates. I mean, it's really quite obnoxious. Why can't I get it right? Maybe I'm just
too click happy. Oh well, I suppose it happens to the best of us!

My overall impression
is this this is a pretty steamy read. If you're looking to read something not exactly explicit, but arousing to the senses, read
this piece! (Turning off the lights won't hurt, either.)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
Keep Writing!
Riot

371

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14 days may be credited.

#3195119

Review of The Call of a Whale

Review by Riot

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **
I am a Rising Star! Please check out my sponsor, hopelesslyoptm!

This review is in response to your entry "The Call of a Whale"

.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Wow, neat poem! I really like how this is spaced out to form a whale tale. I think this is really creative! Especially the waves underneath. It's almost like art, but it's also writing. Way cool.

My favorite part about this is the waves. I love the wording. I don't think I can find any suggestions for this, but I wanted to pop in a note and tell you how awesome I think this is. Keep up the excellent work! It's well deserving of the ribbon that adorns it.

Write On!
Riot

372

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14 days may be credited.

#3177512

Review of The Teddy Bear

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: E

| (4.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Hello, I'm known here as Riot

. This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Firstly, I want to thank you for sharing this piece with everybody. It's very clear that this is riddled with emotions, perhaps very real to you. I found it an interesting read, but I'll be honest, by the end I was expecting a little bit more. I did enjoy what I read up until that point - I think that you had a lot of good build up. If you ever decide to expand on this, please let me know as I'd love to read it again.

I hope this review has been helpful in some way. Feel free to drop by my port sometime and sign "Invalid Item"

!

373

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14 days may be credited.

#3173847

Review of Ariadne

Review by Riot

In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP

Rated: E

| (4.5)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Hello, I'm known here as Riot

. This review is made on behalf of Simply Positive.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Title/Plot: The only "Adriadne" I know of is the greek mythology Adriadne. Taking that into consideration, and since you mentioned it later in the poem and it seemed fitting, I assume that's what you were referring to. Either way, since it's mentioned in the poem at the closing stanza, I find it a good choice - even if nobody understands the context.

Style & Voice: There's a definite tone of voice to this poem. When I read it in my head the first time, I almost anticipated stereotypical ryhmes - just from the flow. But as I re-read it I think the actual "tone" sunk in more. I think you did a good job.

Scene/Setting: Because she touches her toe to the water, I'm almost sure that she's literally by the sea. However, I do like the metaphorical sense of being there as well, as you mention with lines like "a vast ocean of love," and "held buoyant by one another," and a couple of more.

Technical: I suppose I could knit-pick and say that I don't think there needs to be all the commas at the end of the poem, but to me they helped with the 'flow' as typically commas at the end of lines in free-verse poetry signify some sort of 'pause' - I think it's fine the way it is. As for anything else, I could not find any errors.

Overall Opinion: Overall I felt this was a very interesting poem with a lot of deep meaning. Thank you for sharing it with us!

I hope this review has been helpful in some way. Feel free to drop by my port sometime and sign "Invalid Item"

!

374

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14 days may be credited.

#3135531

Review of Autumn Dreamer

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: E

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Hello, I'm known here as Riot

. This review is in response to your entry "Autumn Dreamer"

.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Title: The title of this is very appealing to me as the reader. I think personally it's because I love Autumn, but also because "Dreamer" is catchy in its own rights. Great choice of two words!

Word Choice: See above. Though I also think you did a spectacular job within the poem as well. My favorites are Stanza 1 - Lines 1 & 2, Stanza 2 - Line 1, and the entire ending. I especially like how this is written almost in a story format, as it adds a touch of atmosphere to the entire thing.

Structure and Form: For a free-verse, I have very little to complain about. In fact, I have nothing to complain about. While you kept it free-style, you also managed to keep the rhythm, flow, and structure. I liked how even though you did not follow a specific structure that you still kept all three stanzas four lines. Nice touch!

Imagery: I'm all kinds of amazed with the imagery in this poem. I love the references to all the sounds, sight and color that you added - and not just with the autumn, but also with the phrase "already ginger hair" - There was a real great mix of what she saw and what she was doing.

Theme and Meaning: Well, I was already tipped off with this because of the caption, about how this was inspired by walking up the driveway. However, I almost imagine this as a child playing in leaves, or an adult taking a moment out of their life to appreciate the beauty in simple nature surroundings.

Overall Opinion: I have had this bookmarked for quite some time, perhaps because I had been intending to review it and never got around to it. In any event, I'm sorry I never did, because reading this again has put a smile on my face. Overall, I found this to be a highly well written poem that evoked a nostalgic emotion within me. Thank you very much for sharing it!

I hope this review has been helpful in some way. Feel free to drop by my port sometime and sign "Invalid Item"

!

375

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#3134024

Review of Ouija Believe It?

Review by Riot

In affiliation with

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only **

Hello, I'm known here as Riot

. This review is in response to your entry "Ouija Believe It?"

into "Invalid Item"

. It is NOT the final decision on your placement in the contest.
Please note that this is just a review and my personal opinion of what I read. It is not intended to be rude, hurtful, or in any way discouraging. Like all free advice you can take it or leave it as you please.

Title/Plot: I really think this title is pretty clever. It enticed me into reading the work and got me wondering what you'd be writing about because you included "Ouija" into the title - which made me wonder how you'd present this piece with dialog(ue) only.

Style & Voice: It was very apparent that you had a unique voice. Part of this is due to the responses being spaced out between dashes from Sissy and the Ouija board. I also think that the fact you made Sissy's responses so short was very attentive and indicative of a spirit not having much energy. In any instance where you see a Ouija board being used (whether real life or television or in stories) they often do not have long winded responses. Another good example of this in your story is from the use of her repeating the same phrases over and over again. Furthermore, I'm amazed by the intricacies you stuck with when Sissy used the Ouija board. Looking at her responses, she utilizes both "Yes." and "No." and even mixes it in with spelling out other things. You can see that in the line: No. N-E-V-E-R C-A-M-E

Scene/Setting: The closet and hidden door were the only two real props which indicted where she was at while using the Ouija board, but you drop other clues in the mix by having her mention things like that she opened that closet lots of times. I imagine that the person calling upon the spirits through the Ouija board was doing it in the comfort of her own house.

Characters: Sissy is a great character spirit that utilizes the use of the Ouija board in a realistic fashion. I think her responses are spot on in almost an eerie sort of way, especially when she repeats "S-I-S-S-Y B-A-D S-I-S-S-Y S-A-W" over and over again at what I perceive to be one of her most devastating moments in remembering what happened. I also think that the woman calling upon the spirits asked all the right questions and felt around the situation until she solved what it was exactly that the spirit was trying to convey.

Technical: The only extremely minor thing I spotted with the technical side of this story was after "Then where are you?" - you put "C-LO-S-E-T" instead of "C-L-O-S-E-T"

Overall Opinion: Overall, I was highly impressed with this piece of dialogue. It followed the spirit of the contest well in its creative use by using the Ouija board and I found it to be very creative. After reading this piece I had goosebumps on my arm from the eerie nature of the dialogue. Creepy, but remarkable.

I hope this review has been helpful in some way. Feel free to drop by my port sometime and sign "Invalid Item"

!