🌕 HuntersMoon's (huntersmoon) Reviews

🌕 HuntersMoon

Review Requests: OFF

3,120 Public Reviews Given

3,261 Total Reviews Given

Review Style

Honest but encouraging

I use an outline (form)to make sure I've covered all the bases but within that, it's pure dialogue. Let's talk about your write.

I'm good at...

Short Stories and better at Poetry

Favorite Genres

All

326

Only reviews from the past
14 days may be credited.

#4009890

Review of sacrifice

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Construct Cup Contestants & GP...

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa

A very nice (rhymed

) response to "The Caged Bird." I see you read it and rather than parrot it (no pun intended - well, maybe a little one LOL) you answered it. It's true - some see the loss of freedom as a duty to protect or serve others and in doing so, they find another kind of freedom. I really like this angle of looking at the poem and then responding to its meaning as it touches you. Excellent write.

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

327

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14 days may be credited.

#4009364

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "Broken Record"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Construct Cup Contestants & GP...

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

Okaaaayyyyy.

I worry about you Robin ....

Oh

This is a poem. Sorry, thought I'd stumbled across your blog

Well done, definitely OCD ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

328

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14 days may be credited.

#4009168

Review of desert

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Construct Cup Contestants & GP...

Rated: 13+

| (5.0)

Yes, Ma'am

although I must admit I've never actually stayed (as in camped out) in the desert. Too many "The Hills Have Eyes" movies maybe

Still, reading this I might have had a stray thought that maybe I missed something.

The close was perfect - something I would do! You're making me rethink free verse; maybe it's not the devil's handiwork

Great poem, Rhyssa ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

329

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14 days may be credited.

#4009039

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "Jukai Forest"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Talent Pond

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

Hmmm. This seems a bit familiar

The death companions and the ghostly Yurei add elements of darkness to this tale of the Sea of Trees. Very chilling and a wonderfully dark story against the backdrop of nature. As always, your prose is beyond reproach makes this a riveting read.

Excellent entry ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

330

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14 days may be credited.

#4008935

Review of How To Meditate

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Talent Pond

Rated: E

| (5.0)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz Huh? Oh, sorry, must have gone really deep in my meditation

I guess that makes this a good poem - it worked LOL

Seriously, I thought it was well done and really did answer the prompt. I used to - a long time ago - but gave it up when I found I couldn't uncross my legs at the end of it.

Very appropriate and very enjoyable! You do have a way with words, Tracey ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

331

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14 days may be credited.

#4008834

Review of how to move

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa ...

After 20 years in the military ... and as many moves (my record was 3 in one year LOL) I can totally relate to this. In fact, I just made my last move in March (no, I retired a long time ago - this was by choice) and I discovered that practice does NOT make perfect

A good dose of humor dulled the pain as I read this. Well done!

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

332

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14 days may be credited.

#4008340

Review of dragon and princes

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa

Oh, oh

You used "a" in your description. Shame on you.

Oh well, they never said the description counted. Lovely story - funny ending. Love the dragons saving you from the prince. Great twist.

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

333

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14 days may be credited.

#4007786

Review of Hesperides

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

Rated: E

| (5.0)

Excellent and while not technically "biographical"

I love the play on words and the interweaving of mythological references (the apple, the nymphs associated with night, and the labors of Hercules). The prompt sunset is fully covered as well, since the Hesperides are the goddesses of the evening and golden light of sunset. This was really clever.

The form may not be fully compliant but this is so well done, you give me no choice - it's perfect to me

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

334

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14 days may be credited.

#4007594

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "For Forms Sake"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

Great off beat rhymes and use of irregular structure (right up your alley

) makes this a wonderful example of the Clerihew. I think this was bit more biographical than humor oriented, but being unfamiliar with his written work, what the heck do I know?

Well done, Robin ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

335

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14 days may be credited.

#4007589

Review of Snoopy

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Loopy? Not my Snoopy! Curse you, Red Baron!

Well done and yes, it gave me a smile ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

336

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14 days may be credited.

#4007498

Review of Darkness of Untruths

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Good morning, Tracey

I got a strong flavor of "fool me once, shame on you - fool me twice, shame on me" as I read this. The essential truth - the most hurtful lies are hidden behind a smile and often the most hurtful are sins of omission.

Well done ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

337

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14 days may be credited.

#4007493

Review of believing you

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

Good morning, Rhyssa

I like this. It reminds me of a song (not the TV series

) called "Lie to Me." Sometimes we just don't want to know the truth and you've captured that in this darkish poem. I'm not sure that the ending tracks although very alliterative - pearls, paste, poison but I love the way it flows and the images it brings to mind. Very well done.

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

338

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14 days may be credited.

#4007294

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "Marguerite"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

Hi Fyn

Gee. Free verse. How unexpected

Nonetheless, a dark tale of abuse. Great story line and relevant to today. I love the details of the police station and the "mother-of-pearled bruises." I do love double entendre

. Just an FYI - afterthought is one word

Well done and most enjoyable. I see why you're kicking my @$$ doing so well

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

339

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14 days may be credited.

#4006831

Review of An Extra Life

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: ASR

| (4.5)

Hi SarahRae

Well, a gamer, huh?

Perhaps World of Warcraft or Assassin? I'm not up on the latest RPGs although I know from my own kids just how addictive they can be.

Nicely done. There was no doubt about what you were talking about. The flow seemed good, the words carried images of both the game and the attraction it held and (bless your little heart) you used punctuation so I didn't have to guess when to start and stop

I thought your opening lines really grabbed the reader and pulled me, at least, into this magical world you disappear into.

Good job!

Ken

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340

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14 days may be credited.

#4006174

Review of MIDNIGHT ON THE HIGHWAY

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi COUNTRYMOM-JUST REMEMBER ME

It's just me, Ken (which I'm sure you know

) and I chose to review your item today as part of my review challenge at the "Invalid Item"

. It is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "MIDNIGHT ON THE HIGHWAY"

.

First Impression/Thoughts:
I like it

Nice twist on the end gives it that "hair raising on the neck" feel.

Creativity/Impact:
I'm not sure if this was prompt based but regardless, it was well written and clever.

Message/Theme:
This was a supernatural themed story hidden in a dramatic thriller

Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your words

.

Title - "Midnight on the Highway" is the first thing that prospective readers will see. I thought your title was mysterious and invited the reader in to explore this world of yours. I'm sure some will look just to see what you're talking about. The description line is also part of your writing so don't throw it away - use it to set the stage or create a mood of suspense. Administriva such as "contest entry" can always be added as notes at the end. You only have one chance to entice readers into your story

Grammar/Wording - Your use of language is good and your descriptions support the theme. Your writing technique is excellent and it's always a pleasure to read.

Form/Flow - This was logically and time-based in the story development. Although primarily narrative, I thought you did an excellent job in keeping the tale flowing and building the suspense.

Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:

I really enjoyed reading this. You kept me right by your side with this tale as I accompanied you on this journey of imagination. Thank you for sharing your vision and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best,

Ken

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341

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14 days may be credited.

#4005655

Review of waiting

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with The Poet's Place

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa ...

I hate tearjerkers and you snuck one in on me

OK, I'll admit I'm just a big old softy too. I really liked your response to the prompt; very apropos and (I'll deny I ever said this) I loved the poetry in this. Sometimes free verse reads like a recipe - sometimes, like this, it flows with meaning and emotion.

Well done ...

Ken

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342

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14 days may be credited.

#4005649

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "Still..."

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

Hiya Fyn

Awww. How sweet (seriously, I'm not teasing you). I thought this was a perfect write for the day. I've had thoughts like these myself; I miss my Dad. Now, he wasn't a great Dad but I loved him in spite (or perhaps in a perverse way, because) of his failings. He could always make me smile and I never doubted that he loved me. I guess, in the end, you can't ask for more.

Great write from my point of view.

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

343

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14 days may be credited.

#4004612

Review of of frogs and kissing

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa

What an enchanting fairy tale. Seriously, who knew that royal frogs had the same problems with their princesses that we humans do?

I like the structure (not free verse - the flow) of this. From early years to the wedding, you've woven a light-hearted but image filled story that's sure to capture the imagination of many readers. The required words are placed naturally without a hint of having to be forced. This was a very creative response to the theme and shows what imagination and creativity you have.

Excellent write. Now, let's talk about trying capitalization ...

Yes, I'm kidding you

Ken

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344

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14 days may be credited.

#4004134

Review of Construct Cup V 2.0

for entry "Rhumba Way"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 18+

| (4.5)

Hiya Fyn

No need to look at the clips - I read your lines and music and scenes just came into my mind like watching the movie again

Dirty Dancing may not have been "haute cinema" but it is a classic and one I still watch now and then just for pure fun of it ... and, of course, it is the music I grew up with. LOL Patrick Swayze was always seen as a "B" actor but not in my house! From Roadhouse to Ghost, he always entertained. And Jennifer Grey was the perfect foil for him in this show. Ahh I do ramble on!

This was a great synthesis of the best of Dirty Dancing, the movie ... and, bless your little soul, you even rhymed

My night is complete

Thank you for the memories ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

345

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14 days may be credited.

#4004009

Review of it's in your eyes

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 18+

| (5.0)

Hi Rhyssa ...

Oh, you naughty girl

Well, they do say the tango is the dance of love. Actually, I've spent a lot of time in Argentina (who claim ownership LOL) and when you see it performed you understand how it got its name: "touch" (that's the translation of Tango). It is a very sensual dance but not "sexy" It's really amazing to see someone who really understands its roots and the nuances it commands perform it. It's more than just steps - it's all about attitude

I thought you did a terrific job of capturing those elements in this free verse. You brought in the emotional side and translated it into words.

Since I can't see any room for improvement, I guess this is perfect. Well done.

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

346

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14 days may be credited.

#4003914

Review of The Window

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: E

| (3.5)

Hi Alison

My name is Ken. You were kind enough to review my work earlier and I thought I'd return the favor

. I chose to review your item today as part of my review challenge at the "Invalid Item"

. It is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "The Window"

.

Again, welcome to WDC.

First Impression/Thoughts:
A nicely done mystery with touches of supernatural. Isn't it funny how we can creep ourselves out sometimes?

Since you're new here, might I recommend "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge"

as a place where you can find inspiration and continue your writing of these "flash" works. If you're more interested in longer writes, check out "Twisted Tales Contest"

.

Creativity/Impact:
I'm not sure what prompted this (no pun intended LOL) but I'm a big fan of vignettes - those little slices of life that see every day but ignore. When you stop and capture one, all the possibilities of imagination begin. That's creativity.

Message/Theme:
This has a darkish theme wrapped in a mystery. If there's a message, perhaps it's "you never know ..."

Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your dark words

.

Title - "The Window" - The title is the first thing that prospective readers will see. I thought your title was mysterious and invited the reader in to explore what you'd found. I'm sure some will look just to see what you're talking about. Since it is the only thing a prospective reader will see while scanning the list of items in a writers port, it serves as the advertisement of the poets imagination. You did incorporate the title into the poetic content as well which I thought was an excellent use.

Grammar/Wording - Your prose was well thought out, supporting the theme of mystery. You kept interest with good descriptions that drew the dark images you were creating in the readers mind. Some of the wording felt imprecise. For example, you speak of "old spiderwebs slathered to the surface. While it does mean "spread thickly" I think most will associate it with butter on toast (or something like that LOL) and not really see it as cobweb on cobweb on cobweb.

Form/Flow - You developed this logically and the overall read was good. You built up the mystery around this seemingly out of place window and then left us hanging with an unsolved mystery. Nicely done - push the reader over the edge and then let their own imagination take them on a ride

.

Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:

I really enjoyed reading this although, I do wish you'd take this and expand it. There are so many possibilities LOL. Your talent for story telling is clear and I enjoyed accompanying you on this journey of imagination. I think for a "newbie" effort, you did really well. Thank you for sharing your vision and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best,

Ken

** Image ID #1991968 Unavailable **

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

347

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14 days may be credited.

#4003797

Review of tidal pool

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa

Just dropping by to see how you're fairing

and, as I can see, you're doing just fine.

I really am a fan of these Asian forms and the Tanka is one of my favorites. Less restrictive than a haiku, it's actually a relatively new form in English. I really enjoyed the "connection" aspects of this; the sea has always been a link between people perhaps because, in some deep place in us, we recognize that it is our mother and gave birth to all.

I love the words you chose - my only hesitation came in trying to connect the title with the poem. I didn't get any "tidal pool" feeling from this but rather the open ocean with it's waves and turbulence from the rising storm. Just my feelings - not sure what was going through you as you wrote this.

Very nicely done ...

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

348

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14 days may be credited.

#4003253

Review of a piano

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi Rhyssa

I saw you just posted this and wanted to see what "object" spoke to you today. The piano. Now there's something that really does speak

.

I thought this had a really nice flow to it and you took us through the instrument and helped us understand that it's many parts speaking in one voice. Then, you add the artist who must coax each note into a cohesive whole and you have to marvel at the end result ... of course, not when I play LOL Covering your ears is much easier

.

I really liked the image of "shaping sound" and the alliteration of the words starts this off on a melodic course. I was hoping that you'd go more into the emotions of the piano but, hey, that's me. I'm like that Gary Busey commercial - yeah, I talk to things

Thank you for sharing your talent and your imagination with me today!

Ken

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

349

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14 days may be credited.

#4002991

Review of Construct Cup Creations

for entry "Specters in the Mist"

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: E

| (4.5)

Hi Angels in my Ear

It's just me, Ken (which I'm sure you know

) and I chose to review your item today as part of my review challenge at the "Invalid Item"

. It is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Specters in the Mist"

, part of your book "Construct Cup Creations"

.

First Impression/Thoughts:
Yayyy! It's so nice to read rhyme

Creativity/Impact:
There are hidden secrets in the mist and you've explored them nicely with this ghostly poem.

Message/Theme:
This was an expressive response to the "secrets" prompt. Your descriptions of the "lost souls" were full of imagination. Each verse was well thought out and supported the theme of your poem. A cohesive and clear write.

Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your dark words

.

Title - "{u"Specters in the Mist"is the first thing that prospective readers will see. I thought your title was mysterious and invited the reader in to explore this world you created.

Grammar/Wording - "Mystic depths," "watery graves," very descriptive words that set the tone for this. These are secrets held in the blackness of the sea and you took us on a journey of imagination to visit them. My one hesitation came when you wrote "They appear, but cannot be seen which I thought sounded like an oxymoron. How does one appear if not in sight?

Form/Flow - Written in quatrains with an ABCB rhyme, this flowed very nicely as I read it. You stuck to perfect rhymes which - I think - is critical in keeping the flow going especially when only rhyming every other line.

Poetic devices - I enjoyed your use of enjambment which was very effective in pulling the reader from line to line. I thought your use of assonance (callous moon) also made for a pleasing and flowing read.

Emotion/Imagery -Your dark images kept the ghostly quality of this front and center.

Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:

I really enjoyed reading this. It recalled sitting around a campfire and listening to ghost stories - fond memories of a time that has past.

Thank you for sharing your vision and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best,

Ken

** Image ID #1987307 Unavailable **

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .

350

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14 days may be credited.

#4002813

Review of Inevitable

Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon

In affiliation with Dark Dreamscapes

Rated: 13+

| (4.5)

Hi April Desiree-I'm back!

So, you just can't get enough of my abuse, huh?

I am happy to review your item today as part of my review challenge at the "Invalid Item"

. It is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Inevitable"

.

First Impression/Thoughts:
Very nicely done

Creativity/Impact:
The personification of Death has long been seen walking in our world, whether named or not, and your using him as incarnations of weather is creative and well thought out.

Message/Theme:
The theme is death and destruction primarily and you've gone to great lengths to ensure that the theme is carried out through each line.

Technique/Technical Notes:
I offer you the following as food for thought and not as criticism. You are the writer and this is your work, not mine. The most I can do is tell you what I saw and felt as I wandered through your dark words

.

Title - I think "Inevitable" was a great title; it surely is for most (beyond taxes, of course LOL). It carries with it a foreboding sense which really plays well the poetic contents of your write.

Grammar/Wording - Excellent images that bring to mind the darkness of death and the inevitability of "a black rose upon your lips." The only part which struck me as slightly odd was verse 5. All the others were weather but this one. It just seemed out of place unless you were to add other non-weather verses so it didn't seem so isolated.

Form/Flow - I promise - no harangues on free verse.

I've been doing a lot more research on what it is. From my perspective, I look for a poetic flow and some elements of traditional poetry, primarily metaphor, simile, and imagery that support the theme of write. I try and understand the "why" of the write - why did you break the line here? what images are you trying to create and do they support the overall story/theme of the poem? It's subjective; does it "feel" like poetry. To me, I could feel the poetry in this. I notice, unlike many free verse writers, you used punctuation. Thank you

It really helps to guide the reader.

Now, lets talk presentation

Shaped poems are nearly as ancient as recorded poetry itself. The earliest true figure poems date to the Hellenistic era, in the second and third centuries B.C. and have been used by such modern writers of note as Lewis Carroll (The Mouse's Tale) and Dylan Thomas (Vision and Prayer). Still, I must ask - how can free verse be "unstructured" when you obviously have structured it? What does it add to the poem by placing the words so precisely across the page? I can, in a sense, see a vague tornado shape but the addition of a spider verse runs contrary to that idea so what are you trying to say? You need to answer that, not me?

Poetic devices - great metaphor and similes run through this. Well done.

Emotion/Imagery - The menacing approach of death in his all his guises dredge up feelings of suspense, of fear, of helplessness.

Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:

I really enjoyed reading this. I think you've done well. The two areas you need to consider are Verse 5 and the optical layout. If you know why, then I have under rated your work; if you don't, then I have over rated it

Thank you for sharing your vision and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best,

Ken

** Image ID #1987307 Unavailable **

My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .