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Review Requests: OFF
3,120 Public Reviews Given
3,261 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest but encouraging *Smile* I use an outline (form)to make sure I've covered all the bases but within that, it's pure dialogue. Let's talk about your write.
I'm good at...
Short Stories and better at Poetry
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Public Reviews
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226
Review of Ruin Down House  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Bet

My name is Ken and it is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Ruin Down House on behalf of the "The Rockin' Reviewers.

*Starb* First Impression/Thoughts:
Well, it's about time you posted something. You've made me wait over a year! *Laugh* Yes, I'm just teasing you. I'm not sure what part of Maryland you live in but this was very poignant and reminded me of Baltimore. So much disillusionment, so much neglect.

*Starb* Creativity/Impact:
I really enjoy "everyday" poetry that captures these little vignettes about life around us. Too often they go overlooked. Perhaps we, as a society, don't want to see them because they show us our own failings but it's important that we recognize them.

*Starb* Plot/Content:
This poem is a commentary on everyday America. I saw it reflecting the inner-city but, in truth, it's about the state of our country everywhere. We see the old, neglected houses and call them a blight but fail to see the ghosts of happier times that haunt them. I think you did a good job in bringing them to light.

*Starb* Technique/Technical Notes:
This was written in vers libre - free verse - so there really is no right or wrong. That said, free verse is a challenging form that utilizes the natural cadences of common speech to create rhythm in lieu of the strict usage of meter found in classic forms. Free verse is the breaking of some old rules and the utilization of new tools, not the elimination of any and all rules.

Let's start with the title: "Ruin Down House." This sounds like a colloquialism to my ears. Most often I hear it referred to as "Run Down House." I'll admit, the title is what attracted me to your poem *Smile* and that's what it's supposed to do.

Free verse poems are not written as observations or stories and then broken into lines. The final form is not what makes it a poem; it is the simultaneous use of vocabulary, punctuation, and line break. As I read your poem, I wondered why you chose to break the lines where you did. Every nuance should be done for a reason; to add emphasis or to make it flow.

*Starb* Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
*Star**Star**Star**Star* Overall, I found this a very enjoyable read. Your enthusiasm for the subject and poetry comes through clearly and I found myself emotionally involved. You have captured the emotions of the moment very well. My one hesitation is that I didn't feel that there was a consistent message in this. You raise questions - why was it abandoned, what happened to the occupants, but you leave us hanging. I felt there needed to be something more even if it was just a line on how tragic it was and how it made you feel. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best in the New Year,

Ken

** Image ID #1947700 Unavailable **


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227
Review of True Self  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi Nalthur

My name is Ken and it is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "True Self on behalf of the "The Rockin' Reviewers.

*Starb* First Impression/Thoughts:
A coming out story. Very emotional and enjoyable ... as a story. I didn't see this as a poem, however.

*Starb* Creativity/Impact:
I really enjoyed the way you brought to light his changes by using his own emotions as the foil and then supporting them with actions. Very well told!

*Starb* Plot/Content:
This is a coming out story. I really enjoyed that she came out to herself first, finding peace with her decision and gathering strength and self-assurance so there were no doubts.

*Starb* Technique/Technical Notes:
Free verse is not poetry without form or rules. It is not written as an essay or story and then broken into lines. The final form is not what makes it a poem; it is the simultaneous use of vocabulary, punctuation, and line break. Proper use of the tools of poetry helps to mold a piece to its final state. Simply story telling, then adding line breaks does not constitute a poem.

Free verse is a challenging form that utilizes the natural cadences of common speech to create rhythm in lieu of the strict usage of meter found in classic forms. Free verse is the breaking of some old rules and the utilization of new tools, not the elimination of any and all rules.

*Starb* Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
*Star**Star**Star* Overall, I found this a very enjoyable read. Your mastery of story telling is evident and I found myself smiling as I read this metamorphosis tale. My recommendation is that you do a little reading on free-verse and then try again. This tale, on the other hand, should be turned into a true story. It is a great tale and worthy of being told. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best in the New Year,

Ken

** Image ID #1947700 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Dreaming Moon  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi the_nomie

My name is Ken and it is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Dreaming Moon on behalf of the "The Rockin' Reviewers.

*Starb* First Impression/Thoughts:
First - and foremost *BigSmile* - Welcome to WDC! I'm so glad you found us and wish you well on your journey of discovery. Now, about the poem ... I felt you captured the dreaminess of feelings as you allowed the emotions of the moment to touch you. Very nice.

*Starb* Creativity/Impact:
I really enjoyed that this was nature focused and dealt with how the moment touched you. As Robert Frost said, "Poetry is when an emotion has found its thought and the thought has found words."

*Starb* Plot/Content:
This was fairly straight forward and dealt with your feelings about the moon as you allowed its light beyond your eyes. *Smile* I really like your comparison of the luminosity to "scattered time fragments." I thought that unique and brilliantly stated.

*Starb* Technique/Technical Notes:
This was written in vers libre - free verse - so there really is no right or wrong. That said, free verse is not totally free; 'its only freedom is from the tyrant demands of the metered line'. Free verse displays some elements of form. As in this case, it's self-evident that you chose emotionally rich words and you kept the poetic feel of this. A word of caution - I noticed that you used punctuation in some places and not in others just as you used capitalization of each line except one. It's a minor thing but consistency is one of the keys to good free-verse.

*Starb* Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
*Star**Star**Star**Star* Overall, I found this a very enjoyable read. Your mastery of emotion and enthusiasm for poetry comes through clearly and I found myself smiling. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best in the New Year,

Ken

** Image ID #1947700 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Psyche is P  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hi Moh'd

My name is Ken and it is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Psyche is P on behalf of the "The Rockin' Reviewers.

*Starb* First Impression/Thoughts:
Psyche is P. The title drew me in because I found it amorphous, not lending itself to easy understanding. As I read, I kind of got what you were saying but not entirely.

*Starb* Creativity/Impact:
I'm sure I've missed some of the nuances of your poem since I have no context in which to understand it. I'm guessing you're from Nigeria and this is a lament about what you see happening in your country. It would have been helpful had you filled out your biography (hint, hint *Smile*) That said, I think many will relate to this.

*Starb* Plot/Content:
The essence of your poem appears to me to be an admonition against relying on religion as a cure-all for the problems we face. You stress that it has its place but in itself, it's not an answer. I found the line "we pray more yet see less, we pray more yet hear less, we pray more but feel nothing" especially telling. You detail the evolution of progress and wonder why we haven't embraced it, instead falling back into ignorant ways with statement like "make knowledge your priority, open your mind to impossible possibilities guided by principles." I felt like "Solutions are in the minds we have reduced to praying machines rather than innovative engines." was at the heart of your work.

*Starb* Technique/Technical Notes:
This was written in vers libre - free verse - so there really is no right or wrong. That said, free verse is not totally free; 'its only freedom is from the tyrant demands of the metered line'. Free verse displays some elements of form which, other than enjambment, I didn't see. You have many threads in this tapestry of words and it felt more like you were writing this "stream-of-consciousness" rather than trying to organize this into a coherent whole so that the reader will understand your message.

*Starb* Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
*Star**Star**Star* Overall, I found this a very enlightening read. You've certainly imbued it with emotion and that carries throughout the poem. I really feel that you need to define your message; Is it about how man has been given an opportunity to embrace progress or is it about how we hide from it? Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

I see you're new to the site. Welcome to WDC! I hope that you find us helpful and encouraging and that you will continue to write and grow!

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best in the New Year,

Ken

** Image ID #1947700 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Canvas  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Rhoswen - Relentless Victory

My name is Ken (OK, you knew that *Smile*) and it is my pleasure to both read and comment on your work "Canvas on behalf of the "The Rockin' Reviewers.

*Starb* First Impression/Thoughts:
A nice poem that relates colors to the variances of our lives. I'd never thought of life as a Jackson Pollock   painting. *Bigsmile*

*Starb* Creativity/Impact:
I really enjoyed that you were able to add sensory aspects to your poem. It opens the poem up to the visual realm and stimulates the reader's imagination. The title, "Canvas," was very descriptive and works well in portraying the images your words capture. You link it within the poem with the first line.

*Starb* Plot/Content:
You've used strong imagery and sharply defined words (crimson, pine, sapphire) to bring a vibrancy to the images you portray. In a few places, I felt you may have gone beyond the reader's ability to identify with your words as in "Plush red." In particular, that stopped me since I don't see red and plush together. A lot of that will reside with the reader and their own feelings and perspectives on color. Still, you are the poet and it's your meaning that fills the page.

*Starb* Technique/Technical Notes:
This was written in vers libre - free verse - so there really is no right or wrong. That said, free verse is not totally free; 'its only freedom is from the tyrant demands of the metered line'. Free verse displays some elements of form. As in this case, it's self-evident that you continued to observe a convention of the poetic line in some sense through versification, enjambment, and a continuing linkage from verse to verse. You kept the poetic feel of this and that's the key to good free-verse.

*Starb* Overall Rating/Final Thoughts:
*Star**Star**Star**Star* Overall, I found this an enjoyable read. Your enthusiasm for poetry comes through clearly and I found myself smiling. My one hesitation is that I didn't feel that there was a consistent message in this. Was it about God's hand in the painting or our own choices that paint the picture as seen in your line "vibrant rainbows splash into our wake?" Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

Writing is about communication and this is what I saw in your work and is provided solely for your use. It's offered in a spirit of wanting to give you honest feedback... nothing more.

Keep writing! Wishing you all the best in the New Year,

Ken

** Image ID #1947700 Unavailable **


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Although I think you were too kind ... *Laugh* Nicely done. A great form and perfect for the subject.

Good job, Ben ...

Ken


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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
And to all a good night! *Laugh*

I enjoyed your mock interview with Santa and, while I never knew he was a head, it actually made sense. I mean, a guy who spends a "magical night" each year staring at a reindeer's butt ... well, you get the idea *Laugh*

Well done. Who knew Texan's had a sense of humor?

*Santahat* Ken *BigSmile*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of The Rating  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
You were wise beyond your years when you wrote this ... Think how much wiser you've become since then *Laugh*. OK, maybe I'm being just a bit of a nit LOL.

This is actually very well written. No, not perfect, but certainly above average *Pthb*

Thank you for sharing ... now, get back here and write some more!

*Hug* Ken


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Review of Mayday!  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Chris (or Marvin *BigSmile*)

Nicely done. Since I'm a participant in the SETI program, I obviously enjoyed this tale. I thought the ending would have been a little more forceful without the "Meanwhile, back at the ranch ..." which I think borders on stereotype ... but that's me *BigSmile*. As an alternative, use a brief description of Gorgon peering into the computers, add a touch of his spaceship surroundings, you know - paint a dark picture to maximize the impact. Just a thought.

Some nitpiks:

Opening paragraph you wrote "...and not total waste ..." maybe "and not (a) total waste"
Para 11 - "I am inn great danger." "inn" should be "in"

Most enjoyable ... and a great response to the prompt. Thank you for sharing your talent and imagination with me today.

Ken

PS SETI doesn't use initials - just SETI. No idea why *Laugh*







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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Ich bin ein Berliner! Oh - *Blush* - someone already said that *Laugh*. Lived in Erlensee near Fliegerhorst for 3 years. Wonderful experience!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Did you get this from the Russian hack? *Laugh* ... of course not, it's about the Donald and we know whose side Putin's on *Rolling*. I saw a wonderful post today from a restaurant offering the Trump Sandwich - two slices of white bread, lots of baloney, topped with Russian dressing ... and a small pickle LOL. Great write. Thoroughly enjoyed it!

Ken


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Review of When Autumn Comes  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Brian,

Very poignant and filled with the emptiness that losing a loved one leaves. Well done.

Ken


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
238
238
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Kudos to both you *Smile* A lovely poem about the fragility of life ... and promise of infinity.


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239
239
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Beautifully done ... and I learned a new word *Laugh* Incarnadine ~ [in-kahr-nuh-dahyn, -din, -deen]
blood-red; crimson.
which I'm sure I will steal at some point and use myself *Rolling*

I love that you've added so many sensual layers to this. It really brought me to those exotic shores.

Well done, my friend ... well done!

Ken


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Review of Doggie Time  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hey Petra *BigSmile*

How are you? Well, I hope. Cute story about you and Moses, capturing a small slice of life. If I had to guess, I'd say the reception to this is mixed because some folks will say "what's the point?" I think they miss the point LOL. It's obvious that you and Moses are devoted companions and his happiness and well being are integral parts of who you are.

I thought you did an excellent job of writing this. It's clear, captures this moment in enough detail so that readers will understand your relationship, and ends on a humorous note. You can't do much better than that without straying into the realm of fantasy *Laugh*. Your style is "conversational" which I think makes this very accessible to the reader.

A very enjoyable read, my friend ... Thank you for sharing.

Ken


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241
241
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Not bad for an "off the top of my head" write *BigSmile* Monty, you never cease to amaze me, my friend. Whether writing or life, I guess ... there comes a time.

Let's hope ours is still a long way off *Laugh*

With warmest regards,

Ken


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Review of The Present  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Nicely done *Smile* I was wondering what to get the wife for her birthday *Laugh* Not too sure about the handcuffs ... but a man can dream *Rolling*

Great story, well told and deserving of the win NeedingBeachDuf 🐠⛵🏝️ Congratulations!

Ken


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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hi Neva *Smile*

Interesting ... and, a bit telling *Laugh* I think all of us have a bit of the "primordial" in us. Of course, we seldom admit it, hiding it under guise of politeness. Well, until lately. I see a lot of folks shucking off their sheep's clothing!

Great imagery and strong emotional content. Very enjoyable. It did, however, leave me with a few questions: How do these feelings show up in your everyday life - or do they? Why is this "racial"? I think you could take this another step.

Wishing you the best,

Ken


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of Milk  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hey BD *BigSmile*

What a great little tale! Very human, very touching, thoroughly enjoyable.

Thanks for sharing your talents.

Ken

PS And yes, it was a *Dog2* to write *Laugh*


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245
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi InfoWarrior *Smile*

Hmmm. A talking tree - and here I thought they only "barked." *Laugh* Yes, I'm just teasing you a bit. Personification is a wonderful tool that writers have in their arsenal. You've used it well here.

I noted that you began with a deliberate rhyme pattern which broke down a bit as the poem progressed. That's not a criticism, just an observation, although for me it tends to break the flow of the poem since I get into a cadence while reading. I tend to be a natural rhymer and free verse is difficult for me. *Smile*

Overall, I found this entertaining and easy to read. Thank you for sharing your imagination and talent with me today.

Best of luck in the contest!

Ken


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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Wow - what an eclectic mix of prose and poetry. You, my friend, have a curious mind *Laugh* Let me rephrase - a wonderfully curious mind. I like how you've gathered not only your thoughts but your writings about your writing thoughts.

Nicely done although you embarrass me with your organization skills!

Looking for a Quill nomination for "Best Port" I'm guessing *Laugh*

Ken


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Review of The Eyes Have It  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
You tricky devil *Laugh* Trying to lead me down one path, only to make a sharp left turn at the end. Nicely done and a fun read.

Ken


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Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Angus *BigSmile*

You devil dog you, trying to sneak a story in without letting me know *Laugh* Is this a veiled story about inter-species love? *Rolling* The last time I read something this over-the-top fawning in tone, it was a story I had written about my dog, Lily!

Well, I'm not one to stand in judgement - love is love.

The story was nicely written and held my attention throughout. I will admit, I was hoping for a more transparent ending but "leave them wanting more" works too *Laugh*

Good to see you writing here ...

Ken


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Review of To Hell  
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Mike *Smile*

A nicely dark take on the prompt and great interpretation of the roles of priest and condemned. It's a matter so style, I think but shouldn't the lines be in quotation marks, typical of dialogue? Usually, italics indicate internal dialogue.

Regardless, I quite enjoyed this and look forward to reading more of your work.

Best of luck in the contest.

Ken


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250
Review by 🌕 HuntersMoon
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Very amusing ... be sure to invite me to dinner *Laugh* Re-look at line 1 - I think you meant to type "A rooster without hens"

Nicely done, Neva ...

Ken


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