*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/peterson4279/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/26
Review Requests: OFF
6,332 Public Reviews Given
6,332 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
Previous ... 22 23 24 25 -26- 27 28 29 30 31 ... Next
626
626
Review of Climb  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
just aralls, I enjoyed the earthy affects of ensuing laughing gas. I was transported back to my own college days. Seth, Caleb and gang are tied together naked climbing mount peril. The best moment in the story is at the end. There is a noise on the sacred expedition that bursts through any dire mood. "I'm going to sew your cheeks together if you let another one go".

Thanks for sharing your wisdom. Don't keep it, in let it go.
627
627
Review of The Beach  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello purplecrazzy, You provide longing for the ocean. I love the way you appeal to all the senses. I experience the sand in my toes, the cool breeze, salty smell, kites of all colors flying, parents relaxing while in the meantime children explore. The children find treasure as the frolic on the beach. What a wonderful place to be.
Thanks for sharing.
628
628
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Tim, I love the way you can express what is in the deepest part of your self. In this poem you offer the care and compassion of a spirit that helps one get through hardship and expose a love worth knowing for all eternity. As I read I am reminded of how first impressions transform into soul reflections.
God bless, thanks for sharing. I was blessed.
629
629
Review of The Steps  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
That was a real nice ride Sum1. Who would have thought that a wall, arch and steps could have so much character and personality with a meadow gazing from afar with the look of a Cheshire cat. When you shared about how children used imagination, I celebrated that you came prepared to share yours. The walls, step and arch all have a purpose and role. It may not be what they had hoped, yet in the grand scheme of things it provides a window into what gives life meaning. Not only for these personae, but for all of us who seek.
God bless
630
630
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello Harry, thanks for the wake up call. It can be too easy to send young men to war without considering the consequences. The note at the end brought peace to a generation at the end of the storm: "But for peace, I pray yours might find a way…”


631
631
Review of Cement Floor  
Review by drifter
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hello Jessica, I enjoyed the way you used the drab piece of concrete to paint meaning onto an otherwise blank canvas. I could see the candles burning in a quiet place, breathing in a peaceful meditative stance, a symphony of cars and natures hues. There seems to be something about the door that keeps in or out. The place apart from the door takes on the most energy and reflection.
Suggestions: I am confused at points. I wonder what four o clock means in the context of what you write. I am also trying to understand the tingling and tightness references. Over all it was a rich experience. I found myself wanting to find my own slab to seek out meaning and peace.
thanks
632
632
Review of Dear Me - 2014  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
hello Carly you offer a rather ambitious agenda for the coming year. I like most that you have found a way to make yourself accountable through a written letter about what you want to write. The aconym in the beginning serves as a way to keep a vision. It is one thing to write and quite another to see what undergirds it all. I see this as a tool for you and although I do not understand your poetry and camp experiences, you do and that is all that matters. I did not notice any grammar glitches. It was a fun read. Go for it!!
thanks and god bless
633
633
Review of My Other Self  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Hello J Conscious, I read into your title that you are letting us know you as "the other self", possibly the man behind the mask. I read in your essay a passion that revolves around love for another person "an why when I look in the mirror I see your eyes......." In a sense two can become as one reflected in a mirror. I think the poem has potential as metaphor. There are countless spelling errors/typos. Words like "and", along with running sentence that leaves me out of breath. (few or no periods.) I think it would help to cordon off the lines of the poem that rhyme to give it more organization.
Thanks, I like what you write. I struggle with understanding how you got there.
God bless
634
634
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Open Door To Grace ♥  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Marci, I imagined a kid being ministered to as I read the poem/prayer. In my younger days it was "Now I lay me down to sleep" I believe we all need to name that which might steal away our joy and claim as our own the one way to overcome all Satan throws at us. That is a sermon for people of all ages.
God bless
635
635
Review of Heart of Texas  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (2.5)
Hello K., I appreciate your romantic impressions about two lovers who are finding their way into a relationship. I find myself wanting to know more about these characters and how the title speaks to what your title means for these two persons. I am especially curious about Jamie and what she means for the story. I leave with a lot more questions than answers.
636
636
Review of ladybug  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hello Jen, I like your playful impressions. I can resonate with a lady bug focus. It is almost childlike in its appeal. I am not sure about crushing the poor thing and then sweeping it under the rug. That is no way to treat a lady. I would like more emphasis on the bug itself and what makes it the center of attention. Why kill it after all?
thanks and God bless
637
637
Review of New doors  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hello Sunshine, I see an opportunity to explore what open doors have been opened and will open in the future. There is intimation about something special having happened and anticipation of something better. I would like to know more about what you mean by ex-pats. It is assumed that I know what this means and I don't thanks!!













638
638
Review of My name is Sam  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
Hello Jen, I like the idea that is offered. We are filled with all manner of identities and yet in the long and short of it we are here to get an education. I resonated with the idea of being a ham and connecting this with Sam I am in Dr. Seuss. I would have liked you to spend more time on what made Sam funny.
Thanks for sharing and God bless
639
639
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Tim, I merely offer my input. I am very sure that the poem means something to you that I can not compare with.
The first line might read better as dragging as if moving slow, sagging to me has more to do with a youth craze as to fashion.
The second line might read better: I am so...
The third By, rather than of indicating cause and effect.
I find this Fourth of July
more filled with inspiration to feel fine
This line is fine
And intimate as any in recent memory. I think intimate say something personal does not. Personal feels too generic
Celebrations and rewards that come out way
spur us on to be more generous and grateful
Because of sacrifice and freedoms won on our behalf
The richness of an undeserved blessing (we can not do enough to deserve, another words)
reminds of our valuable and lucky
and venerated each of our souls can be.
Just thoughts If you have questions let me know.
Thanks for your good work

640
640
Review of The Reason Why  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Hello Bsheep, thanks for the offering of your own intent. The question of purpose and meaning is one that all are confronted with. I like some of your thoughts about the writing craft. It is the offering of brokenness and journey into a world that is known only to the writer himself.
You have peaked my interest with the motivation of one knowing pain and resentment. Tell me more.
thanks and God bless
641
641
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Feather duster, I am glad for your desire to improve grammatical skills. I am in the same boat, except that I am coming to the end of the beginning course. Thanks for sharing. I am guessing you do your assignments within your portfolio. I do not know what your asides mean. I looked at each sentence and it looks like you did well.
God bless
642
642
Review of Hello?  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hello MI, the sentimenst of your poem were perfect for me last week. I read it as a rant to God or whoever you allot that much power to. I resonated most:
What did you seek then? To hear your own words?
So don't hate me if I doubt that your voice was heard

I have had confllict with one of my children and I can imagine them saying something like that.
Thanks for sharing, I sure hope that brain keeps thinking more ideas of like ilk!!
God bless
643
643
Review by drifter
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Malachi, reading your article made my day. I have three children that could very easily fit into your profile of what it means to be social in a world that is becoming increasingly antisocial.

I grew up in a world without these devices. I was in a neighborhood where I had lots of friends. We visited talked and played on a regular basis. I felt like I entered the twilight zone as I watched my kids get bombarded by the newest phone or newest technical skill. Who needs to talk when you can text. My daughter used to create literally thousands of texts in a month. I look back and wonder and shake my head.

I think your analysis is correct. You have been able to use Holmes and Moriarity in a metaphorical sense. One is optimistic and the other more negative. The truth lies somewhere in the middle. I would like to suggest another device, social interaction. It is free and freeing. That is the bottom line of what you are saying. Good luck in writing more articles that might wake up you and your generation to that reality. Pray for those of us who are not in that crowd. We have a LOT to learn!
Watch out for grammar typos: ex.
Yet, the Moriarty would view that the statement as giving away his or her position and shows that they have been noticed or detected, perhaps watched.
Read the sentence again or have a friend read it. What are you wanting to say?
thanks for sharing. It was enlightening!!!
God bless
644
644
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello kings, that was just what I needed to hear in this sacred moment. It is too easy to want to write daddy off as an inconvenience that does not work as good as it used to. Your song offers the reality of what a culture denies. Mommy may be sweet. Without daddy they are missing the other part of themselves and unless it finds its way back into the life of a child, the child will be eternally lost.
Thanks for the message. I can not wait to hear what the song sounds like.
God bless
645
645
Review of Doha Drivers  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello sunshine, I love the vigor and energy in this piece. I am thrust into a culture where rules of the road mean nothing. I was particularly tickled by the sound of horn for no apparent reason. As I read the poem I was reminded people in our own country that act the same way. At the end of a day one has to wonder what planet am I on.
Thanks for sharing. It was very entertaining. I will think twice before going to the middle east.
watch our for typos. Weaving n and out.

God bless
646
646
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Sisco's Good Deed Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Tim, your poem reads like a profound bit of wisdom from an oriental philosopher. You offer up a picture that communicates to an everyday event. It can appear to an outsider that a person has it all together. The mask is shed when the person enters the water of risk an encounters alligators just waiting for him to slip. At the end of a day one is left wondering who to trust. At times risk for risk sake is a sure sign of impending death. "Look before you leap."
Thanks you did a fine job of keeping my attention, no grammar mistakes were noted.
647
647
Review of Reversion  
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Open Door To Grace ♥  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hello Jeff, It sure sounds like this guy keeps getting hooked and the bait is something he can not resist. I liked the opening and the whole idea of the story. I hope we all know enough to let someone free rather than imprison them in our controlling nature. The story brought me back to the times I watched the little mermaid story with my daughter over and over again. That is my only critique. What is different from the love sequences I am familiar with. The story reverts to an old formula and I am left wondering if there is any such thing as true love "under da sea".
Thanks
648
648
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Open Door To Grace ♥  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello LovingU..., I enjoyed the challenge that you offer up. It says somewhere in scriptures that love cast out fear. The reality is that it is much easier to be cautious, so that I do not risk falling or failing.
" Somehow along the way, we forgot how to ask, to question;
Curiosity running our brains wild"
Impression: I do not know Janus, it might help to have a footnote.
You got me full of energy to fly by the time I got to the end of your essay.
That delicious rush of boundless unforeseeable consequences
Something to seek and crave for
DARE I SAY?
thanks

649
649
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Open Door To Grace ♥  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Harry, I loved the way you were able to string me along longing for the caress and joy that was getting ready to break loose. I caught images of a sleeping beauty, filled with beauty beyond compare and yet in the end her bad breath spurs me on to the bathroom.
Thanks for the dry humor-it is no doubt dryer than it was before needing to go pee.
650
650
Review by drifter
In affiliation with Open Door To Grace ♥  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello Maria, thanks for your musings about the world of mental illness. I think you are right in saying that you do not know what it is until you have been there. Family and friends can have the best intentions and miss the essence of what is going on. I like especially the part about accepting the thought process that seems overly dramatic to many. I will look up that book and your DBSA sounds like a helpful group. I have dealt with the issue since 1976 and am learning it is one day at a time and some days, "watch out because here I come".
2,559 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 103 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/peterson4279/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/26