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True algorithm ia in response from the reviewed. Honed craft over 17 years. I see the good, with an eye to potential. Will never be/play authority of someone else’s words. That’s left to the master of the work. The artist has the vision; I just react/review, illuminate a fuller perspective to overcome challenges faced with those words. I see responses my reviews as affirming. *has references*
 
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Poetry, psychoanalysis. Ideas and notions on publishing process. I encourage writers with my reviews, look for strengths and give direction on how to make something better. I continue to correspond those who approach, when more to offer. I see what drives, use experience and the overarching mind, connect where each individual’s art derives. Hope to opine where it could take them with their craft. Like to believe, sometimes, before the writer knows themself.
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76
76
Review of On the Other Side  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Joey,

"On the Other Side" is beautifully crafted, how love transcends physical distances, incorporating elements of nature and celestial to convey a deep emotional connection. The style is contemplative and romantic, evoking yearning and devotion. The theme of enduring love across vast distances is interwoven with vivid imagery, creating a narrative that should resonate with readers.

The form is structured, utilizing well-defined stanzas to guide through the speaker's emotional journey. Each stanza contributes to gradual revelation of the feelings, mirroring the unfolding layers of love. The use of rhyme, such as in "dreams" and "seams," adds a musical quality to the verses, enhancing the overall rhythmic flow. This rhythmic consistency contributes to the poem's soothing and contemplative atmosphere.

Poetic devices are employed with finesse to enhance the emotional impact. The metaphorical use of the Atlantic Ocean as a metaphor for the physical separation between the speaker and their beloved is particularly poignant. The line "Miles apart, yet close in dreams and thoughts" encapsulates the central theme, emphasizing the power of love to bridge geographical distances through shared dreams and thoughts. The comparison of the beloved's laughter to a melody in the ocean's song adds a sensory layer to the poem, invoking aural and visual imagery that deepens the reader's connection to the emotions conveyed.

Rich in its exploration of love, further exploring the personal reflections on the challenges and triumphs of a long-distance relationship could further the impact of this poem. Delving into specific moments or memories shared across the Atlantic could add a more intimate dimension, allowing one to connect on a more personal level. For instance, expanding on the metaphor of the lighthouse beacon and the anchor could create additional layers with symbolism, offering insights into the emotional resilience and commitment.

Your poem's closing lines beautifully capture the essence of enduring love, emphasizing voice of this unwavering devotion. To enhance the emotional resonance, experimenting with varying line lengths or incorporating enjambment in the final stanza could add dimension. This can create a sense of fluidity, mirroring the boundless nature of the depicted love.

In consideration, "On the Other Side" is a heartfelt exploration of love's ability to transcend physical distances. Its contemplative style, vivid imagery, and effective use of poetic devices contribute to a poignant and resonant narrative. And, with subtle adjustments to rhythm and exploration of more specific moments, your poem has the potential to deepen its emotional impact. A pleasure once again to view and offer my thoughts.

Sincerely,

Brian

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Contemplator of all things big, small, non-existent and interdimensional


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77
77
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello Thaddeus,

"Longing To See Sis" is a heartfelt elegy that beautifully captures the essence of love, loss, and the enduring connection with a departed sister. The poem exhibits a genuine emotional depth, conveying the profound impact Linda had on the speaker's life.

The style of the poem is sincere and evocative, allowing the emotions to resonate with the reader. The straightforward language adds to the authenticity of the piece, making it accessible and relatable. The use of rhyme, particularly in pairs, enhances the rhythmic flow, contributing to the poem's musicality. For instance, in the lines "Your smile lit up our hearts, and still does to this day. / We miss hearing your laugh, so we take time to pray," the rhyming creates a gentle, comforting cadence.

The theme of longing and reminiscence is poignantly conveyed throughout. The speaker expresses the ache of missing Linda's presence, from the warmth of her smile to the joy of hearing her laugh. This theme is universal, and many readers will connect with the emotions of yearning for a loved one.

The form of the poem adheres to a consistent structure, utilizing quatrains with alternating rhyme. This provides a sense of order and symmetry, enhancing the poem's overall cohesiveness. The simplicity of the form complements the straightforward language, contributing to the poem's accessibility.

The use of specific details, such as Linda's homemade apple jelly and her love for pranking with flamingos, adds a personal touch to the elegy. These details create a vivid image of Linda, making her presence palpable in the poem. The mention of the flamingo prank becomes a poignant symbol, representing the lighthearted and playful memories shared with Linda.

One suggestion could be to explore more varied poetic devices to enrich the imagery and evoke a deeper emotional response. Consider incorporating metaphor or symbolism to amplify the impact of Linda's influence. Or, just something to consider incorporating when crafting that next poem. Expanding on the symbolism of the pink flamingo could provide a nuanced layer to this piece.

"Longing To See Sis" is a touching tribute that resonates with genuine emotion. The heartfelt expressions of missing Linda and cherishing her memory create a moving elegy. I found it beneficial to read and consider your poem for this feedback.

Sincerely,

Brian
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78
78
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Chris,

"From Under The Willow Tree" establishes a captivating atmosphere with its evocative setting and mysterious elements. The story unfolds with a strong hook, drawing readers into Fae's world beneath the willow tree. The theme of a young girl navigating the challenges of her haunted environment adds a layer of intrigue and sets the stage for the unexpected.

The vivid description of the willow tree as Fae's refuge effectively creates a sense of security in contrast to the haunting experiences she faces elsewhere. The haunting entities, especially Arbuckle and Bucky, contribute to the eerie ambiance. These elements provide a solid foundation for the story, giving it a unique and engaging premise.

The pacing is well-managed, gradually building tension as Fae's curiosity about the barn intensifies. The interaction with the haunts adds complexity to the plot, hinting at a larger mystery surrounding Bucky. The narrative effectively combines elements of the supernatural with the mundane struggles of a young girl, creating a compelling blend of genres.

However, as the story progresses, you might want to consider providing more details about the haunts and their backstory. This could deepen the reader's connection to the supernatural elements and enhance the overall intrigue. Exploring the history of the farm and its previous tenants could add layers to the narrative.

The ending introduces a surprising twist that adds a chilling dimension to the story. The revelation about Bucky's true nature raises questions and leaves room for further exploration. The abrupt shift from curiosity to fear is well-executed, contributing to the suspense.

One suggestion is to refine the dialogue tags and ensure clarity in the exchanges between Fae and the haunts. For instance, in the line, "Play," Fae heard his voice, consider specifying whether the voice is audible or more of a mental communication to avoid confusion.

"From Under The Willow Tree" holds much promise with its intriguing premise, atmospheric descriptions, and unexpected twists. Expanding on the supernatural elements and providing additional context could elevate the story further. I wish you success in your writing endeavors.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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79
79
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hello Leighoire ,

Your story, "Do You Want To Know?" presents a gripping scenario and explores complex family dynamics. The opening paragraphs draw readers in with a vivid portrayal of the psychic medium's experience, setting the stage for a mysterious and emotional journey. The use of sensory details, such as the energy spots and the jolt through the spine, effectively immerses the audience in the supernatural atmosphere.

The theme of secrets and revelations is well-established, adding depth to the narrative. The unfolding drama between the characters, particularly the family's reactions to the psychic medium's revelations, creates tension and keeps the reader engaged. The incorporation of a diary as a key plot element adds an intriguing layer to the story.

One notable strength is the dialogue, which feels authentic and serves as a crucial tool for character development. The distinct voices of each character contribute to a realistic portrayal of their personalities and emotions. For instance, the daughters' skepticism and the mother's emotional turmoil are palpable through their words.

However, to enhance the story, consider providing more nuanced introspection from the psychic medium. Delve into her thoughts and emotions, offering readers a deeper understanding of her perspective and the challenges she faces in conveying messages from the other side. This could strengthen the connection between readers and the protagonist.

Additionally, while the dialogue is a highlight, be cautious of repetitive phrases, such as the frequent use of "I asked" and "she replied." Varying the dialogue tags in your attribution could contribute to a smoother flow and prevent monotony.

In conclusion, your story holds promise with its compelling premise and well-crafted dialogue. Strengthening the introspective elements and refining dialogue tags can elevate the narrative. You've created an engaging story that combines the supernatural with familial drama. I found it a pleasure to have read that I might provide this response.

Sincerely,

Brian
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80
80
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Michael Stirland ,

"Harmon The Hedgehog" is a delightful children's story that combines elements of imagination, bravery, and humor. The opening paragraphs successfully set the tone, introducing readers to the charming protagonist, Harmon, and establishing the whimsical nature of the tale.

The theme of courage and the power of encouragement shines through, offering a positive and uplifting message for young readers. Harmon's imaginative world, complete with a theme song and a wooden sword, adds a playful touch, making the story engaging for children. The incorporation of a theme song not only adds a musical element but also contributes to the story's potential for adaptation into other media forms.

The vivid descriptions of Harmon and his surroundings create a visually rich experience for young readers. The use of details like "beady black eyes," "round furry body," and "cute button nose" paints an envisioned picture of the hedgehog, enhancing the overall appeal of this story’s narrative.

The introduction of the "monster" as a fence post with a bucket cleverly plays with the idea of perception and fear, providing a humorous twist to the story. The theme song for the monster adds an amusing touch, showcasing the story's whimsicality.

One suggestion for improvement could be to expand on Harmon's emotional journey. Providing more insight into Harmon's feelings and thoughts as he faces the perceived monster would allow young readers to better connect with the character. For example, describe his initial hesitation, building anticipation, and the surge of courage after receiving encouragement. You might also consider incorporating more interactive elements or questions that encourage engagement with the intended readers. This could involve asking them to imagine their own courageous adventures or suggest what Harmon might encounter next in his ongoing escapades.

In conclusion, your hedgehog children’s tale offers a delightful and imaginative journey for young readers. Strengthening the emotional connection with the protagonist and encouraging reader participation could further enhance its overall impact.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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81
81
Review of WHISPERING WISHES  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello Dear Departed Sherri, *Angel*

I was caught by the title. Engaging with "Whispering Wishes," I found a poem that reflects an exploration of grief and the impact of loss. The theme of yearning for a departed loved one permeates the verses, creating an emotional effect that many readers might be able connect with. However, some aspects of style, theme, and form I can provide with constructive feedback.

Stylistically, the poem’s simple language should effectively convey emotions tied to mourning for any reader. The repetition of the refrain "I’m constantly whispering wishes" serves as the anchor, emphasizing the persistent nature of this grief. However, need to be mindful of overusing this repetition, as it could lead to a sense of monotony. It might have been considered to use varied phrasing to maintain the emotional intensity while introducing a more subtle nuance.

The theme of loss is exhibited throughout, creating a noted narrative. The poem seems to rely on an attempt at sincerity, allowing readers to believe the depth of the speaker's pain. To enhance the thematic impact, it would have been wise to get more specific into memories or experiences that evoke the essence of the departed. This would have added a layer of vividness, allowing readers to also relate in the intimacy of those types of moments.

Structurally, the poem adheres to a consistent rhythm and rhyme scheme, contributing to its accessibility. However, it needed to be cautious of predictability. Experimenting with breaking away from strict rhyme schemes at key moments helps create surprise or emphasize certain emotions. For example, in the line "Wishing the emptiness I feel would subside," would need adjusting for the rhyme scheme to amplify the emotional weight of the sentiment portrayed.

Poetic devices, such as metaphors and similes, can be a poet’s friend, elevate imagery within a poem. Introducing figurative language to paint a more vivid emotional landscape would have helped. For instance, instead of stating "God’s holding you now until I join you," exploring metaphorical expressions can convey the spiritual connection, deepening emotional impact.

Now, if suggestions were made, it would be incorporating sensory details to evoke a more immersive experience. Appealing to the senses by describing sights, sounds, or scents associated with the memories of the departed is poetry 101. This could have enriched the reader's connection to the speaker's grief in this old poem.


Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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82
82
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Max Kwoa,

"Irony, O Irony..." unfolds as a poignant elegy that delicately navigates the complex emotions surrounding loss, while also addressing societal shifts. The opening lines, "Mellow fumes of incense waltzing above your grave, Barely soothe myriads of senses all so livid," evoke a vivid atmosphere, using sensory imagery to immerse the reader in the grieving process. The choice of "livid" adds a layer of intensity, reflecting the emotional turmoil provoked by the perceived indignity of Irony's demise.

Your style in this elegy is distinctive, combining elegance with a touch of lamentation. The repetition of "Mellow fumes of incense waltzing" serves as a melancholic refrain, emphasizing the ritualistic aspect of mourning. The poem's tone oscillates between reverence and frustration, mirroring the conflicting emotions tied to the departure of a cherished concept. The deliberate use of enjambment, as seen in "Enraged by the ignominy of your passing," propels the reader forward, heightening the emotional impact of each line.

The theme of intellectual resilience against societal norms emerges as a focal point. The lines, "Deterring pompous arrogance defined your quest; Glorious battles facing bored minds all so rigid," reflect a nuanced critique of conformity and the intellectual battles Irony faced. The elegy suggests that Irony served as a guardian against the stifling nature of conventional thinking. The juxtaposition of "pompous arrogance" and "bored minds" highlights the societal forces that sought to undermine the essence of Irony.

In terms of poetic devices, the use of alliteration in "Glorious battles facing bored minds" enhances the musicality of the verse while underscoring the conflict between intellectual vigor and complacency. The repetition of the word "passing" in the closing lines creates a poignant echo, emphasizing the finality of Irony's departure. Additionally, the clever incorporation of contemporary elements like "wifi" adds a layer of relevance, subtly commenting on the contemporary challenges faced by nuanced discourse in a technologically driven world.

As a suggestion, consider exploring the impact of Irony's absence on the broader cultural landscape. How does society grapple with the void left by a concept that once served as a check against superficial thinking? Expanding on these societal repercussions could deepen the elegy's thematic exploration.

I enjoying experiencing this poem, to give thought and lend my feedback.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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83
83
Review of Portraits  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Sharon,

Recently, I took an interest at looking for poems emulating art to inspire some ekphrastic poetry of my own and discovered your offering.

Congratulations on your First Place win in the Hopeless Romantics Photo Prompt Contest with your poem "Portraits." I’ve come here to explore the elements of style, theme, form, and poetic devices that contribute to the success of your piece.

Stylistically, I have found a poem that begins with a command, "Take my hand, be still with me," immediately drawing this reader into a moment of intimacy. This direct address sets a contemplative tone, inviting readers to share in the speaker's emotional journey. The use of vivid imagery, such as "movement in the angry sea" and "the setting sun upon her face," creates a palpable atmosphere, enhancing the overall impact.

Thematically, "Portraits" captures a poignant snapshot of a romantic encounter, emphasizing the transient nature of love. The portrayal of lovers in a "last embrace" conveys a sense of both urgency and finality, echoing the impermanence of fleeting moments. This theme aligns seamlessly with the photo prompt contest, as it translates visual inspiration into a deeply emotive verbal expression.

Structurally, the poem adopts a concise form, fittingly mirroring the fleeting nature of the captured moment. The brevity of the lines adds to the sense of immediacy, allowing readers to immerse themselves in the emotion without unnecessary embellishment. The careful balance between brevity and depth showcases your skill in conveying a rich narrative within a limited space.

Poetic devices play a pivotal role in enhancing the emotional resonance of the poem. The juxtaposition of the lovers' embrace with the dolphin's play and the tearing apart by the wisp of air introduces a layer of complexity. This use of contrast creates a poignant tension, underscoring the delicate nature of love and its vulnerability to external forces. The "wisp of air" becomes a subtle yet powerful symbol of disruption, echoing the fragility inherent in romantic relationships.

As for suggestions, should you revisit, you could consider experimenting with enjambment to evoke a continuous flow between lines, mirroring the fluidity of the depicted scene. For example, in the lines "Now gaze upon the dolphin's play / beneath the setting sun's display," a seamless transition between these thoughts could intensify the emotional connection.

It was a unique pleasure to take interest in your poem, to see how it functions, and lend comment.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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84
84
Review of Wraith of Time  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY!! "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


A Belated Happy Account Anniversary, Aundria:

As I immersed myself in "Wraith of Time," the poignant metaphor of a caged bird standing on the grave of her dreams immediately struck a chord. The opening stanza set a somber tone, with the bird warbling an aria on the burial ground of unfulfilled aspirations. The theme of captivity and the impact on one's dreams becomes the focal point, unraveling a narrative of stifled potential. Very familiar to me, in my own pursuits.

The poem's style does well to capture the emotional weight of confinement. The juxtaposition of the bird's past life being an opera, and the current reality of a prison, paints a stark contrast. This stylistic choice highlights the transformative power of freedom and the subsequent loss when confined. The use of "trills a mournful refrain" intensifies the sense of sorrow, echoes the bird's lament within this metaphorical prison.

In terms of form, the poem adheres to a structured yet fluid pattern, mirroring the passage of time. The progression…remembering a life without bars to the monotony of repeating ballads…reflects the gradual erosion of hope and creativity in the face of confinement. The choice to present the bird's songs as unchanging over the years adds the layer of melancholy, emphasizes the stagnation within the cage.

Poetic devices, particularly the choice to draw inspiration from Maya Angelou's "Caged Bird," add depth to your poem’s narrative. The quote from Eowyn in "The Lord of the Rings" further enriches the thematic exploration, underscoring the fear of being confined and losing the opportunity for greatness. These intertextual references enhance the poem's resonance, connects it to broader literary themes of captivity and lost potential. For me, this resonates as a suppressed writer. We often get stuck in life, in our choices where to remain. My voice, stifled, cannot find a forum. Effectual, this poem, in getting a response from me.

As for any suggestions, it might be a good idea to consider exploring additional sensory details to evoke a stronger emotional response. That’s if you should revisit this older poem. Descriptions of the physical and emotional toll on the caged bird could amplify a reader's empathy. For example, getting further into the bird's physical state or the changing colors of its feathers over time might add some vividness to the portrayal.

It was a pleasure to have perused your poetry to find this particular piece to consider for my feedback. Hope you enjoy the rest of this month’s account anniversary.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
Anniversary Reviewer
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85
85
Review of Anger  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*BalloonO* Happy WDC Anniversary Milhaud - Long Tail , *BalloonV*

Upon delving into the depths of "Anger," the stark simplicity of its title sets the tone for a journey into the tumultuous terrain of human emotion. The use of ellipses after the word "Anger" creates a pregnant pause, a breath held in anticipation, foreshadowing the intensity that unfolds in the subsequent lines. The brevity of these lines, combined with the strategic use of spacing, amplifies the emotional weight, drawing the reader into the visceral experience of anger.

The style of your poem exhibits a striking contrast, mirroring the turbulent nature of the emotion it explores. The initial lines employ vivid imagery, portraying anger as a descent into a dark abyss. The alliteration in "dark and roiling" intensifies the turbulence, while the repetition of short, staccato phrases in "a plunge downward," "a light sucking," and "disappearing act" creates a sense of relentless descent, mirroring the suffocating grip of anger.

Thematically, your poem masterfully navigates the turbulent journey from anger to liberation. The imagery of "leaden limbs" and "anchor weight" vividly conveys the physical and emotional burden of anger, anchoring the reader in the oppressive depths of this emotion. However, the turning point, marked by the gentle imagery of a "twirling kitten's tail" and the liberating ascent propelled by positive experiences, introduces a nuanced perspective on anger. The contrast between the oppressive descent and the featherlight ascension captures the transformative power of positive moments in overcoming anger.

Poetic devices play a pivotal role in shaping the emotional landscape of your poem. The metaphorical use of a "black hole" as a representation of anger is particularly poignant. It encapsulates the all-consuming, seemingly inescapable nature of this emotion. The juxtaposition of the "hateful mud-sucker" further personifies anger, portraying it as a malevolent force clinging to one's being. This vivid imagery serves to evoke a visceral response, immersing this reader to acknowledge the emotional turbulence described.

One suggestion to enhance the thematic depth is to explore the aftermath of anger's dissipation. Perhaps, if the poet has time to reconsider, delve into the lingering effects or the process of healing, offering a more comprehensive exploration of the emotional journey. This could provide a more rounded narrative to complement the powerful depiction of anger and liberation. Readers often enjoy resolution in a poem that heads in this direction, right after the described conflict.

In conclusion, "Anger" is a visceral exploration of the tumultuous emotional landscape, skillfully navigating the descent into anger and the subsequent ascent to bliss. Should you revisit, expanding on the aftermath of anger for a more comprehensive narrative can give completion, but overall, your poem resonates with evocative imagery and emotional intensity. It was a pleasure to discover and consider for feedback. Have a great WDC Account Anniversary month…almost over.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
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Mudsucker. Good expression. Still resonates.


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86
86
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*BalloonB* "Once Upon a Thanksgiving" , a WDC Account Anniversary Review *BalloonY*

Hello Wolfius

Seems appropriate to consider your poetry about the season, incorporated in this anniversary review.

Upon diving into "Once Upon A Thanksgiving," I find myself immersed in the delightful rhythm of its verses. The playful use of rhyme and the sing-song quality create an inviting atmosphere, drawing me into the heartwarming spirit of the holiday. The poem's brevity mirrors the simplicity of Thanksgiving, emphasizing the essence of gratitude and familial bonds.

The style of your poem, characterized by its succinct lines and whimsical tone, allows for an accessible and enjoyable read. The repetition of ending sounds in "chompin'" and "giving" adds a musical quality, enhancing the overall cadence. This musicality resonates with the festivity of Thanksgiving, making the poem feel like a lively celebration captured in words.

Thematically, your work beautifully captures the essence of Thanksgiving — focusing not only on the tangible elements of turkeys and pumpkins but, more importantly, on the intangible aspects of family and love. The simplicity of the language becomes a strength as it mirrors the straightforward nature of the holiday itself, emphasizing the value of gratitude over material abundance.

In terms of poetic devices, the rhyme scheme contributes to the poem's harmony. The AABB scheme in the first two lines establishes an expectation, while the departure from it in the third and fourth lines surprises the reader, adding a touch of unpredictability. This subtle deviation mirrors the unexpected joys found in moments of genuine gratitude.

One suggestion to consider is the exploration of metaphor or symbolism to deepen the thematic layers. Introducing metaphorical elements, such as comparing the act of giving thanks to the blooming of flowers or the warmth of a hearth, could add richness to your already charming piece.

In conclusion, "Once Upon A Thanksgiving" is a delightful ode to the spirit of gratitude, encapsulating warmth and joy of the holiday. Consider experimenting with metaphor to add depth, but overall, your poem radiates the heartwarming essence of Thanksgiving as it stands. Have a wonderful season and happy 1st birthday in our writing community.

Sincerely,

Brian
Affiliated WDC Angel Army
and Account Anniversary Reviewer
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87
87
Review of I AM.....  
In affiliation with The WDC Angel Army  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*PartyHatBl* This is an Account Anniversary review. *ConfettiB*

Hello Bash!

I've had the pleasure of reading your poem, "I AM…," and must commend you on your distinctive style and thought-provoking theme. The concise nature of the poem immediately captures attention, and your use of repetition adds a rhythmic quality that enhances the overall impact.

The introspective opening of the poem, with the repetition of "Way too," sets a reflective tone, inviting readers to contemplate the complexities within the speaker's identity. The contrasts you present, such as being "way too big" for some people and "way too happy" for sadness, create a vivid and engaging portrayal of the speaker's self-awareness.

Your style is notably bold and unapologetic, contributing to the poem's strength. The repeated use of "Way too" serves as a powerful device, emphasizing the speaker's assertiveness in defining themselves. Consider exploring additional stylistic elements or experimenting with line breaks to further emphasize key phrases, enhancing the overall visual and auditory experience.

The theme of self-identity and the rejection of societal expectations is clear and resonant. To deepen this exploration, you might consider providing specific examples or anecdotes that illustrate the speaker's defiance against societal norms. This could strengthen the emotional connection for readers, allowing them to relate more intimately to the speaker's journey.

The form of the poem, with its concise structure, aligns well with the theme of simplicity mentioned in the last line. However, you could experiment with enjambment or varied line lengths to add a layer of unpredictability, mirroring the unpredictability of the speaker's identity. This could enhance the overall flow and impact of the poem.

Your use of opposites and contradictions, such as being "way too cool" to be hot and "way too simple" to hold a grudge, contributes to the depth of the poem. Consider expanding on these contradictions, providing deeper explanations or vivid imagery that paints a more detailed picture of the speaker's multifaceted nature.

I found that, "I AM…" to be a compelling exploration of identity with its bold style and resonant theme. It’s possible to elevate the poem further, if you give further consideration, with experimentation anllowing additional stylistic elements, specific examples to enhance the theme, and exploring varied line structures. Happy 1st WDC Account Anniversary!

Keep up the excellent work!

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Angel Army Reviewer
WDC Account Anniversary Reviewer
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88
88
Review of Dear God  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*BalloonB* Happy 1st WDC Account Anniversary KJB ,

I have come to offer a review for your anniversary at WDC. LET’S GET STARTED…

In this poignant exploration of faith and disillusionment, the poem "Dear God" delves into the complex dynamics between humanity and divinity. The opening lines set a reflective tone, questioning the perceived silence of a distant god and the temporal disparities between human and divine perception. The introspective nature invites readers to ponder their own spiritual connections.

The poet employs a conversational style, utilizing short, impactful lines to convey the emotional weight of feeling forsaken. The repetition of "Dear God" acts as a refrain, emphasizing the desperate plea for understanding. The poem's structure reflects the disjointed relationship described, with fragmented thoughts mirroring the fractured connection between the speaker and their deity.

Themes of abandonment, confusion, and the tarnishing of sacred bonds pervade the verses. The imagery of war ships and angels left at the gate evokes a sense of betrayal and highlights the consequences of misinterpreted faith. The use of metaphors, such as "Letting Go spells out," adds depth to the narrative, emphasizing the unheard voice and the struggle to release ingrained beliefs.

The second stanza intensifies the emotional turmoil, addressing feelings of blame and disbelief. The vivid imagery of hell engulfing homelands serves as a powerful metaphor for the societal chaos fueled by religious discord. The question of worthiness becomes central, questioning the sacredness of the speaker's relationship with the divine—a theme that resonates with anyone grappling with their faith.

The third stanza introduces a personal journey, where the speaker confesses to periods of denial and hypocrisy. The metaphor of a mirrored finish suggests a self-reflective struggle, while the mention of a littered sea and dried-up stream conveys the environmental toll of humanity's actions. This shift adds layers to the poem, expanding its scope beyond the individual to address broader existential and ecological concerns.

In the final lines, the reference to Gaia and the metaphor of blood running through pipelines confront the reader with the consequences of human actions on the planet. The poem subtly critiques the ego-centric worldview that blinds individuals to the interconnectedness of all life, creating a powerful call to reevaluate our impact on the world.

Food for fodder.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power and Account Anniversary Reviewer
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89
89
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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*BalloonP* *PartyHatBl* A WDC Account Anniversary review.
Subject: Review of Pennywise short fiction, “Night Of The Trumps!"*Scared* *Monster2*

*Balloonr* Happy WDC Account Anniversary, *BalloonB*

Dear Pennywise,

I explored your portfolio upon learning this month is your…*counts on fingers and toes* (hmm, I better have that looked at) 18th year at Writing.com?! I stumbled into this fiction quickie, struck by the title, “Night Of The Trumps!”…a great hook. I've read this flash fiction short story, and appreciate the intriguing premise you've set up in just a few words.

Your choice of dialogue adds a dynamic element to the story, creating a sense of urgency and tension. The "Night of the Living Dead" reference adds a playful touch, engaging readers with a familiar nod. However, the brevity of the piece leaves some aspects under-explored. Probably written for contest or activity, it’s a true challenge. The introspective opening could have benefitted from a deeper dive into the characters' thoughts and emotions. Give more to go on, motivations, quirks, back story, any conflict. For instance, you could expand on Barbara's feelings about her name and Kevin's teasing, giving readers a stronger connection to the characters.

The theme of the story is certainly clear, but consider weaving in subtle foreshadowing or hints throughout the introspective section to build anticipation. That’s what readers need, look for…and purpose of that anticipation. This could create a more cohesive narrative, enhancing the impact of the unexpected twist when the masks are revealed.

Regarding the ending, the abrupt shift from seeking help to a menacing situation is effective, but providing a bit more context or background could enrich the reader's experience. Perhaps a brief mention of the characters' suspicions or a hint at the masks earlier in the story could make the twist even more impactful.

Your use of dialogue is a strength, injecting personality into the characters. To enhance this, consider varying the sentence structures in your introspective paragraphs. This can add a rhythmic flow to the narrative and keep the reader engaged.

In conclusion, "Night Of The Trumps!" has a promising foundation. You can take it beyond these 300 words to see what more you can do to really put that hooked reaver in story. To elevate this even further, get deeper into character introspection, more dimensional, foreshadow the theme, provide a bit more context for the ending. What is it about presidents masks that are so creepy iconic trope for these artistic endeavors like cinema?

Keep up the good work! I wish you success. Have a great month!

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power/WDC Anniversary/Reviewer
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90
90
Review of Menacing Tones  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
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*BalloonB* *PartyHatV* A WDC Account Anniversary review. Happy WDC Anniversary Scarlett, *Fireworks2* *Fireworks7*

Dear Scarlett,

I had to dig in the way back of your poetry file, looking for a comedy piece and discovered this. So, a review of MENACING TONES.

As I look into "Menacing Tones," the poet's frustration with the intrusion of mobile phones into our lives becomes palpable. The opening stanzas capture a universal sentiment, as the speaker confesses to cursing and groaning at the ubiquitous sound of mobile phones. This visceral reaction immediately engages the reader, prompting introspection on the omnipresence of technology in our daily existence.

The poet's style is straightforward yet infused with a wry tone, creating a sense of shared exasperation. The use of informal language, such as "bloody things," adds a touch of colloquial authenticity, enhancing the connection between the poet and the audience. This choice of language not only reflects the speaker's emotions but also invites readers to nod in agreement, fostering a sense of camaraderie.

Thematically, your poem explores the invasion of technology into personal spaces, highlighting its impact on communication and social dynamics. The repetitive nature of phone-related scenarios, from public places to personal conversations, emphasizes the inescapable reach of mobile devices. This thematic consistency adds depth to the poem, turning it into a commentary on societal shifts and the erosion of traditional modes of interaction.

But, it’s been some years. How do you feel about it now? This would be a wonderful opportunity to bring forward how technology is even more invasive, accepted, a part of every day life. Might be something to further explore from your unique perspective, two decades later. *Shock2*

In terms of form, this poem adopts a rhythmic structure, mirroring the regularity of mobile phone interruptions. The concise yet impactful lines contribute to the poem's pacing, allowing the frustration to build gradually. Poetic devices, such as rhyme and alliteration, subtly enhance the musicality of the verses. For instance, the rhyme in "train" and "again" or the phrases as in "beeps and trills" contribute to the overall auditory experience.

As a suggestion, you might consider exploring further the emotional toll of this technological invasion. Though, that’s in the past. But, an added stanza that delves into the emotional consequences or societal implications could have deepened the poem's impact. Like, addressing the potential loss of genuine human connection in the age of constant digital interruption could provide a poignant contrast to the humor and frustration expressed. And that’s still a problem, especially in this modern age.

It was a joy to go through this portal to the past and consider your verses for reaction. And another Happy Anniversary…month. *Smile*

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
and WDC Account Anniversary Reviewer
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It’s always fun to see how much technology has changed since 2003. Let alone a week ago?


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91
91
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello Mike,

"Henchmen Resources" draws readers in with a humorous and engaging narrative, providing a fresh take on the fantasy genre. The witty dialogue and amusing situations create an enjoyable reading experience. The story's theme, revolving around the challenges faced by unlikely henchmen in a fantastical world, adds a unique and entertaining element to the plot.

The opening sets a lighthearted tone, immediately capturing the reader's attention with Erirk's breakfast mishap. The humor is well-executed, making the characters relatable and endearing, despite their unconventional roles. The dynamic between Erirk and Grok is a strong point, adding depth and camaraderie to the story.

The incorporation of bureaucratic elements, such as contracts and forms, adds a satirical twist to the fantasy setting. It's a clever choice that enhances the comedic elements and provides a humorous commentary on workplace dynamics, even in a fantasy world. The revelation of Erirk's role as an HR manager adds an unexpected and amusing layer to the narrative.

However, consider refining the pacing during the interaction with Tiffany. Some parts could be condensed to maintain a brisk flow. Additionally, exploring more of Erirk's internal thoughts and emotions during crucial moments, such as the interview with Bobert, could further immerse readers in the story.

The ending, with the twist of Erirk being hired as an HR manager, is a delightful surprise. It adds a clever and unexpected resolution to the characters' journey, showcasing the story's ability to subvert fantasy tropes with humor. Building on this, you might consider exploring how Erirk navigates his new role and the challenges it presents.

I found this story to have successfully blended fantasy elements with humor, making it an entertaining read. With fine-tuning pacing and delving deeper into character emotions, the story could emerge with an even more immersive reading experience.

Sincerely,

Brian
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92
92
Review of Berowden Pass  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello Gambit ,

"Berowden Pass" paints a vivid picture of a heroic last stand, showcasing the valor of the Stormbringers against overwhelming odds. The story effectively captures the chaos and intensity of battle, emphasizing the sacrifice and camaraderie among the characters.

The hook of the story, with broken spears, shattered arrows, and dead men, immediately sets a somber tone and raises questions about the fate of the Stormbringers. The theme of bravery and sacrifice is prominent throughout the narrative, providing a strong emotional core. The focus on Larek, Raz, and Bariean creates a personal connection for the reader, making the characters' struggles more impactful.

The ending delivers a poignant and powerful conclusion, revealing the fate of Larek and emphasizing the legacy he leaves behind. The moment when Raz names his child after Larek adds a touching and bittersweet note, providing a sense of closure to the narrative. This choice brings a personal touch to the broader theme of sacrifice.

The storytelling is immersive, with detailed descriptions of the battle scenes, showcasing the author's ability to create a vivid and engaging setting. The pacing is generally effective, capturing the ebb and flow of the battle and maintaining tension throughout.

However, there are moments where the narrative could benefit from a bit more clarity. For example, during the final confrontation, the transition from Larek fighting to Raz climbing the rocks is abrupt. Providing a smoother transition or a brief acknowledgment of the change in focus would enhance the flow of the story.

Consider exploring Larek's internal thoughts and emotions more deeply, especially during his final moments. Delving into his mindset could add an extra layer of connection between the reader and the protagonist, making his sacrifice even more impactful.

In summary, "Berowden Pass" is a compelling tale of heroism and sacrifice, effectively conveying the horrors of war and the resilience of the human spirit. Strengthening transitions and exploring characters' internal landscapes could elevate the narrative even further. I’m happy to have discovered and read some of your writing today.

Sincerely,

Brian
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93
93
Review of Weep  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hello erbiage ,

I was on the hunt for elegies, and discovered yours and felt compelled to send some feedback.

In this poem "Weep," your poignant exploration of sorrow is deep. The opening lines set a somber tone, as "Eyes that weep and seep out sorrow" immediately draws the reader into the emotional landscape. The use of alliteration in "Borrowed handkerchief at hollow" adds a rhythmic quality that resonates with the theme of longing and emptiness.

Your choice of words, such as "honoring," "bleeding," and "pleading," creates a vivid tapestry of emotions. The repetition of the "ing" sound in "Salving word sounds soothing" enhances the musicality of the poem, providing a delicate counterpoint to the heavy themes explored. I know of other poets who’d go demonstrably crazy with all words ending ‘ing’ as over-doing’. Have to do what sings from that flow. Hearing aloud and audience response is the thing. ‘Ing’ is hard to avoid.

The poem's form mirrors its content, with short, concise lines that amplify the impact of each emotion. The refrain "It is not yet tomorrow" becomes a powerful anchor, reinforcing a sense of hope amidst the despair. Consider experimenting with enjambment to create a more fluid flow, allowing emotions to spill seamlessly from one line to the next. This could allow redacting ‘ing’ in a few places, putting more power in the tighter, shorter expressions.

The thematic exploration of time, sleep, and tomorrow adds depth to the elegy. The metaphorical use of the well of sorrow is compelling, suggesting an inexhaustible depth of pain. You might consider expanding on this metaphor or introducing other symbolic elements to enrich the layers of meaning.

In conclusion, "Weep" is a moving elegy, ‘sort of’? *Smile*, and it effectively captures the nuances of sorrow. Your skillful use of poetic devices, combined with a strong thematic foundation, makes this a resonant piece. Should you continue refining this work, consider experimenting with different forms and metaphors to further elevate the emotional impact. You’ve touched on something. Editing, experimenting can take the poet in many directions.

Keep creating and envisioning with the strong foundations of your artistic visions of inspiration.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
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94
94
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Javery,

Your poem "A Perverted Elegy for Atlantis" presents a vivid and haunting exploration of a submerged world, weaving together themes of decay and loss. The title itself carries a sense of irony and intrigue, setting the stage for a unique take on the elegy form. The initial lines, "A lone skyscraper / Pokes out from beneath white waves," establish a striking visual that immediately captures attention. The use of the metaphor "atrophied framework, anorexic" evokes a sense of fragility and decline, adding depth to the portrayal of Atlantis.

The skeletal scaffolding metaphor runs throughout the poem, creating a cohesive and impactful theme. The description of barnacles clinging to the skyscraper's sides adds a layer of detail, symbolizing the persistence of life in the face of ruin. Consider expanding on this metaphor to explore how nature reclaims or adapts to the remnants of human creation beneath the waves.

The funeral motif in the second section intensifies the elegiac atmosphere. The imagery of "dark tombstones" and "tendrils of dirt" creates a powerful visual representation of the underwater graveyard. The phrase "Ebon characters of dirt in ornate font" introduces a poetic paradox, merging the elegance of funeral rites with the starkness of decay. To enhance this contrast, experiment with varying the tone and pacing within this section.

Poetic devices, such as alliteration in "bubbling upwards" and internal rhyme in "Eddying indecisively / Nowhere," contribute to the musicality of your work. These devices enhance the rhythmic quality of the poem, creating a sense of flow that mirrors the movement of water. If you were to edit/experiment further, consider incorporating more sonic elements to further enrich the auditory experience. It can be a refreshing reading experience, hearing aloud a poem like this. With its visual structure, notwithstanding.

As a suggestion, delve deeper into the emotional resonance of Atlantis's demise. Introduce personal or human elements that might connect readers on a more visceral level. This could involve exploring the perspective of those who once inhabited Atlantis or reflecting on the broader implications of its fall.

In conclusion, "A Perverted Elegy for Atlantis" is captivating in its exploration of loss and decay, skillfully employing metaphor and vivid imagery. Perhaps, should this be further further developed, with its thematic elements and attention to sonic devices, your poem can become an even more immersive and resonant experience for readers. A pleasure to have read with opportunity to lend my thoughts.

Sincerely,

Brian
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95
95
Review of Briefly  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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Dear Happy30s …
*BalloonB* Happy Account Anniversary Month,

"Briefly" captures the fleeting nature of time in a succinct yet thought-provoking manner. The brevity of the poem mirrors its theme, emphasizing the transience of moments. The opening lines immediately draw attention to the passage of time, creating a reflective atmosphere that prompts readers to consider the ephemerality of experiences. The simplicity in language contributes to the accessibility of the theme, allowing readers to engage with the poem's message on a personal level.

Stylistically, the poem employs a straightforward language that aligns with its theme of simplicity and brevity. The repetition of words like "briefly" reinforces the central idea, emphasizing the ephemeral nature of time. This repetition serves as a rhythmic device, creating a subtle cadence that echoes the ticking of a clock. To enhance the impact, consider experimenting with varied sentence structures or incorporating occasional internal rhyme to add a touch of musicality. For example, "Briefly, time slips away, a fleeting waltz."

The theme revolves around the deceptive nature of time and the ease with which moments slip away unnoticed. The poem highlights the danger of linking one unit of time to another, suggesting that such connections can lead to a sense of illusion. To deepen the thematic exploration, consider incorporating more vivid imagery or specific examples that resonate with universal experiences. Describe the subtle changes in seasons or the quiet passing of days to evoke a stronger emotional response from the reader.

The form of the poem is concise, mirroring the brevity it explores. The use of a list format, detailing different units of time, enhances the poem's structure, providing a visual representation of the temporal progression. To add a layer of complexity, experiment with enjambment or line breaks that disrupt the expected flow, mimicking the unpredictable nature of time. This can create a visual impact that complements the poem's theme.

Poetic devices like alliteration and repetition are effectively employed, contributing to the poem's rhythm and emphasis. The repetition of "briefly" serves as both a thematic anchor and a rhythmic device. To further enrich the use of poetic devices, consider incorporating metaphor or simile to evoke a more vivid image of time slipping away. For instance, compare time to a subtle breeze that eludes our grasp or a river flowing steadily toward the sea.

In conclusion, "Briefly" is a poignant exploration of time's fleeting nature. By experimenting with varied sentence structures, incorporating vivid imagery, and enhancing poetic devices, the poem can deepen its impact, resonating more profoundly with readers.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
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96
96
Review of Gloriana  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Dear High Druid ,

Having delved into your ekphrastic poem, "Gloriana," inspired by Anthony Blake's painting, I am compelled to share my reflections on the vivid portrayal of a sailing race. Your evocative language and imagery paint a captivating scene, prompting introspection on the themes, style, and form embedded within your verses.

In the open, the imagery of "snow-tipped, blue-grey peaks" and the sloop slicing through the waves immediately transport readers to the dynamic world of the painting. The phrase "spray, thrown aside, the thrill of a close race" captures the essence of movement and excitement, setting the stage for an exploration of a theme of fleeting moments of glory in a sailing competition.

Your style in "Gloriana" is marked by a harmonious blend of descriptive lyricism and a sense of urgency, mirroring the intensity of the sailing race. The repetition of the phrase "few more feet left" emphasizes the anticipation and suspense, creating a rhythmic quality that resonates with the motion of the waves and the race itself. This stylistic choice contributes to the immersive experience.

Thematically, the poem delves into the juxtaposition of the imminent triumph at the finish line and the frozen, fearful moment. The contrast between the dynamic action of the race and the stillness at the brink of victory adds depth to the narrative. The mention of gulls squabbling over an unseen meal introduces a subtle layer of competition and survival, mirroring the themes present in the painting.

The form, with its concise and focused stanzas, effectively captures the intensity and brevity of the racing moment. The shorter lines and fragmented structure mirror the fragmented nature of the frozen moment, enhancing the overall impact. You might consider experimenting with enjambment or varied line lengths to further amplify the sense of movement and anticipation.

Poetic devices, such as the personification of the boat as leaping over the waves and the elegant gaff rig soaring, add a dynamic and vivid quality. You have effectively conveyed the exhilaration of the race and contribute to an immersive experience for any reader. Exploring additional metaphors or similes could further enrich the descriptive elements.

As a suggestion, consider diving into the emotions of the sailors or the spectators, offering a glimpse of their experiences during this frozen moment of glory. Adding a human perspective could deepen the emotional resonance and provide a more holistic narrative.

Thank you for sharing "Gloriana." Your skillful depiction of the sailing race has a lasting impression, and look forward to further poetic endeavors.

Sincerely,

Brian
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97
97
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Again Jamison,

I found another by you that I thought I could review.

Your poem "memories in motion" offers a poignant and relatable snapshot of a moment within the context of everyday life. I'd like to provide an analysis of your senryu’ s style, theme, form, poetic devices, and notable elements of this form, along with some suggestions (if it will help) for further refinement.

Introspection:
"memories in motion" presents a common scenario that many can relate to - the act of reminiscing about cherished memories while in a moving vehicle. The poem captures a blend of nostalgia and humor, revealing a significant moment within the mundane context of a car ride. The juxtaposition of savoring memories and a sudden interruption adds depth and relatability.

Style and Theme:
The senryu effectively adheres to the customary 5-7-5 syllable structure, but it's more lenient compared to haiku, focusing on human experiences and emotions. The theme of the poem appears to revolve around the tension between personal reflection and external distractions. It explores how even in moments of quiet introspection, the outside world can intrude and interrupt.

Poetic Devices:
This senryu employs a combination of imagery and dialogue to convey its message. The speaker closes their eyes to savor memories, which is a vivid image of someone lost in thought. However, it's the use of dialogue that provides an unexpected twist and a touch of humor. The wife's exclamation, "Stop the car!" introduces an element of surprise and external interference, effectively breaking the reverie.

Examples and Suggestions:
To further enhance the senryu, you could consider more sensory details to immerse a reader in the moment. Describing the specific memory being savored or the physical sensations of being in the car could intensify the emotional impact.

Additionally, while the dialogue provides humor and a surprising twist, you could experiment with alternative ways to introduce the interruption. For example, using descriptive language or actions to convey the wife's urgency might offer more room for imagery and emotional resonance.

I found "memories in motion" relatable, capturing tension between introspection and external interruptions. Its use of dialogue and imagery is effective, providing both humor and depth.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
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98
98
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hello Again,Kåre Enga in Udon Thani ,

I trust this review finds you well. Having delved into your ekphrastic poem, "We never asked her name," inspired by Benson Koo's monochrome ink drawing, I am eager to share my reflections on a haunting narrative you've crafted. Your exploration of mystery and horror within the artwork prompts introspection on the themes, style, form, and poetic devices present in your verses.

In the opening paragraphs, the stark portrayal of screams permeating the air immediately immerses readers in a chilling atmosphere. The repetition of "we looked here, we looked there" adds a sense of urgency, creating a visual and auditory tension. The enigma surrounding the central figure, revealed in fragments, sets the stage for an exploration of the theme of unnamed suffering and the burden of unasked questions.

Your style in this poem is marked by a concise yet evocative use of language. Phrases like "arsenic, old lace" and "grimace? just a trace" create a vivid image of a masked figure, adding layers to the visual narrative. The alliteration in "hands and feet tightly bound" contributes to the rhythmic quality of the lines, enhancing the overall impact of the poem.

Thematically, "We never asked her name" delves into the consequences of silent observation and the weight of unspoken inquiries. The lines "did we know her shame, did we share her blame, at whom did she aim" evoke a sense of collective guilt and complicity, raising questions about the responsibilities of those who witness suffering. The refrain "we never asked her name" becomes a poignant reminder of the overlooked humanity behind the horror.

The form of your poem, with its short stanzas and impactful lines, mirrors the abruptness and intensity of the depicted scene. The economy of words contributes to the overall suspense, leaving readers with lingering questions. You might consider experimenting with line breaks or stanza structures to further emphasize the disquieting atmosphere and enhance the pacing of this narrative.

Poetic devices, such as the personification of bones creaking and the vivid imagery of ichor splashing, elevate the horror elements of the poem. The olfactory detail of "reeking smell of rotting leeks" engages the senses, creating a visceral experience. Exploring additional sensory details could further immerse a reader in the eerie world you've crafted.

As a suggestion, consider the POV of the observers, exploring their internal struggles and emotions as they grapple with the unfolding horror. Providing glimpses into their thoughts could add a layer of complexity to the narrative and deepen the impact of the poem.

Thank you for sharing "We never asked her name." Your skillful handling of suspense and the unspoken adds a haunting quality to the piece, leaving a lasting impression. I’m looking into this form as I’ve done a Zoom session with my poetry group and plan to craft and hand in something from the limited palette of painters provided. Guess it will be Monet for me. *RollEyes*

Sincerely,

Brian
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99
99
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello JCosmos ,,

"Love Haiku Sonnet" presents a unique fusion of the traditional Japanese haiku and the sonnet form, weaving together moments from everyday life with an undercurrent of love and gratitude. The stylistic choice to incorporate haiku within the sonnet structure adds a layer of brevity and precision to the narrative, creating a harmonious blend of two distinct poetic traditions.

The theme of the poem revolves around finding solace and joy amidst the challenges of life, ultimately anchored in the speaker's love for their wife. The thematic progression mirrors the course of a day, from the morning's unsettling news to the calming blues in the afternoon, culminating in a moment of quiet appreciation during the evening. This thematic arc introduces a relatable narrative that resonates with the reader's own experiences of seeking refuge in small, cherished moments.

The style of the poem is characterized by its simplicity and directness. Each haiku encapsulates a snapshot of time, contributing to a mosaic of emotions and activities throughout the day. For instance, the opening haiku, "Coffee in morning / Listening to the news unfold / None stop gloom and doom," sets the initial tone, capturing the mundane yet pervasive nature of negative news. The subsequent haikus build upon this foundation, creating a nuanced exploration of the speaker's emotional journey.

The form of a sonnet provides a structured framework for the haikus, offering a sense of cohesion to the diverse moments presented. The transition from one haiku to the next within each quatrain establishes a rhythmic flow, guiding the reader through the day's unfolding events. This structured form complements the spontaneity of the haikus, creating a dynamic interplay between order and free verse.

Poetic devices are subtly employed, enhancing the emotional impact of the poem. The repetition of "soon, all too soon" in the second haiku emphasizes the urgency and inevitability of the speaker's need to disconnect from the overwhelming news. The intentional use of line breaks and enjambment in "I open a bottle of red wine / Drinking my red wine" creates a deliberate pause, emphasizing the contemplative nature of the evening ritual.

As a suggestion, consider exploring additional sensory details to further immerse the reader in each moment. Descriptive language related to the taste of coffee, the sound of blues music, or the aroma of red wine could heighten the sensory experience, allowing readers to more fully engage with the scenes presented.

I enjoyed my encounter with this unique poem.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
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100
100
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Dear Voodoo Dreamer ,

Upon delving into "The Tantalus Lament," I am immediately struck by its unique blend of dark undertones and intricate symbolism. The opening lines beckon readers into a realm where honor is questioned amidst thieves, setting the stage for a contemplative journey.

The sonnet's style is notably distinct, employing a concise yet evocative structure. The choice of the Shakespearean sonnet form adds a classical touch, enhancing the gravity of the theme. The quatrains skillfully unfold the narrative, presenting nimble fingers and tangled weaves, a vivid metaphor for the intricacies of deception. This style invites readers to appreciate the poetic craft while immersing them in the narrative.

The thematic exploration of honor, justice, and deceit is compelling. The poem resonates with a sense of moral ambiguity, painting a picture of chaos and darkness. The contrast between "Smiling faces in the Light" and "Labor in the Darkness sweet" adds depth, underscoring the duality inherent in the human experience. The thematic cohesion throughout the sonnet is commendable, creating a thought-provoking atmosphere.

Poetic devices such as alliteration and metaphor are well employed, enriching the language. The phrase "Steel-trap mouths" conveys a sense of secrecy and hidden truths, while the repetition of "Where is the Honor 'mongst the Thieves?" serves as a powerful refrain, emphasizing the core inquiry. These devices contribute to the overall texture of the poem, heightening its emotional impact.

Suggestions for refinement include considering variations in meter for rhythmic diversity. Additionally, providing more explicit examples of the thieves' actions could enhance the narrative, offering readers a clearer glimpse into the world depicted. Overall, "The Tantalus Lament" is a thought-provoking sonnet that adeptly weaves together thematic depth and poetic craftsmanship. I thank you for sharing your words with the community.

Sincerely,

Brian
WDC Super Power Reviewer
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