Understanding This Review:
: Statement applies to poem.
: Second look suggested.
Additional comments may be included directly under the appropriate aspect.
Title fits item.
Item is rated appropriately.
Description is well-suited to the item.
Item fits with the chosen genres.
I was a tad surprised, after reading, that religious nor spiritual was listed as a genre.
Everything was simple to follow and understand.
The flow was smooth with little to no hiccups.
Syllable count/ pattern is steady throughout.
While there was no set syllabic count, the short lines throughout this poem, in combination with the abcb rhyme scheme, gave this poem a wonderful, lighthearted tone and somewhat fast pace that I really enjoyed.
Rhyme scheme is consistent and rhymes do not feel forced.
The only comment that I could point out here is the rhyming of more with itself, however, that would just be a nitpick. Although I had it drilled into my head that a word should not be rhymed with itself, this did not detract from your words nor the flow, that it is repeated in the poem, makes it feels... right. (Basically, if you're going to give this to my old teachers, change it; if not, don't you dare change a thing!).
Emotion is well-relayed and easily understood.
One of my favorite aspects of this poem is how you manage to relay your longing to be more and, later, your faith, without making this poem feel too heavy. Between flow, tone, and wording, this poem felt so light that the weight of it just crept in without being ... a slap in the face, for lack of better words.
Scene and/or image can easily be seen while reading.
The ease with which the reader can relate to this poem leads to memories and scenes from their own life dancing before their mind's eye which, to me, is perfect imagery.
While the syllabic count did not hinder the flow, I noticed that it was just a stray syllable here or there that was extra or absent. I don't think it's necessary, but if you wanted to make it more consistent, that could easily be done by just adding or changing a word here and there.
In the last line, my brain kept reading never instead of not. I am not sure if this is because of the syllable count or what, but I figured that I'd mention it.
RATING AND OTHER THOUGHTS
I love the feeling of this poem and that it is not overwhelming with emotion nor religion. The longing to be more is not shoved in the reader's face, but told to them in such a way that, as they relate, they are smiling and comforted instead of feeling any sadness. That it left me smiling only added to the pleasure of reading your words. While, sure, one could nitpick here and there, I found this poem to be a delight and did not see any blatant errors nor big gaps where improvement could be made. For that reasons, I'm going to click 5.0 and thank you for sharing this with us. It's a refreshing read. Thank you.