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1
1
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


Howdy! Me again. *Bigsmile* Just doing another GoT review. *Angelic*

This was an enticing title and intro. Well done! I also see you filled in 3 good genre options, so nicely done there. *Delight* Though that means that if this is like the other, I'll be STRUGGLING to find things to improve this piece. You're just a great writer. *Heart*

"I mean, what? Over an anchor? Okay, I untied your anchor. Did I ever say I knew how to sail?" Holy crap, another awesome comedy! *Laugh*

"In all sincerity, what the hell? I didn't know it was bait. Do they think I would purposely barbecue bait?" *Rolling* Yikes! Uh, yeah, maybe it was a ruse to not be asked to cook anymore. That would be my private excuse. *Laugh*

"Yeah, wave-wave; you see me, the little guy you blamed the fire on? Yeah, here I am!" *Shock2* What the heck?!? I love how you just throw that in there like it's nothing. Just when we think he's bad enough, there's ANOTHER thing he did. *Rolling* WOW! Yeah, this dude is horrible! (Also, I just realized I didn't check to see if my last review was long enough... *Think* I hope so...?) Anyway, this bit literally had me laughing out loud! That's hilarious! I dated a couple of Navy guys (they weren't in the Navy when I met them, but apparently I was driving them to join for some reason lol) and one thing I learned is that a fire on a boat is very, very bad business! *Yikes*

"And I'm NOT a peeping-tom! I truly resent that! I was just curious. You yacht people do some strange s***." YES! That's hilarious!!! You know, as a reader. It would NOT be funny if I was one of those yacht people. *Think* *Yikes*

Okay, after reading this, I'm not sure I'd go with Nonsense as a genre. It does make sense. The nonsense things I've read are really hard to track such as "I got a dog called a Rhodesian ridgeback when I when young man, what are you doing?" That's just one example of how nonsense can work, but see how the words start out with one sentence, then morph to another, then another? Yours makes perfect sense. Maybe consider Travel, Transportation, Psychology, Melodrama, Environment, something that's just not Nonsense, IMO. *Wink* Mostly, I find nonsense difficult to read and yours was a pleasure. *Bigsmile*

These are all just my opinions. Do what you wish with them, but do keep writing! You've certainly got talent. Thank you for sharing your skill with us! *Heart*





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
2
2
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


Howdy! I'm reviewing for GoT and as a late participant, me and 2 other late folks have to all review at 5 different yellow cases with 2 items from their port. We all review the same items, so you'll be seeing more reviews on this. lol

I assume you've seen on the Newsfeed that guinea pigs have been a big topic for like the last 6-8 months as someone has been posting lots of stories with imaginary guinea pigs. lol That's why I picked this story. *Smile* Actually, I just checked your fan list and you probably have NOT seen all the guinea pig stuff, unless you get on the Community Newsfeed, which I assume you don't since like 5 people on the whole site do. *Think* To get to see more activities and meet more folks (and sometimes read some guinea pig nonsense), definitely check out the Community Newsfeed! To get there, you click Newsfeed to go to your Personal Newsfeed. Then along the top, you'll see "View the Community Newsfeed." Click that and you'll see what everyone is posting (within your rating limits), not just your tiny corner of WdC. There's lots of excitement going on...though right now, a lot of it is centered on GoT (Game of Thrones). *Wink*

Anyway, good job actually editing this item! You'll see a lot of stuff in my port has the same Created and Modified dates/times. *Think* Good job being better than I am. *Laugh* Though I see you listed Contest Entry as one of your genres. I would strongly advise against that. (And against using Other as a genre. *Wink*) If your work gets nominated for "The Quills, you're basically throwing away opportunities to win. The item is put into the category you nominate it for (assuming it fits lol), but then it's automatically put into the genre categories the author listed. No matter how obvious it is, if it's not listed, it doesn't go in that genre category, so you'd miss a 4th chance at a Quill (the main category you're nominated for, plus all 3 genre categories).

Another reason to use good genres is that genres are the #1 way folks search for items to read. People don't search for Contest Entries (or Other), so you're missing out on up to 1/3 of your possible readers. *Shock* *Sob* Without having even read the story, if you're listing Pets, I'm sure you can list Animals. I would guess also Home/Garden, based on the title. I've started reading and think you should go with Comedy as the other option. *Laugh*

Now to read the story. *Bigsmile*

"Guinea pigs can smell fear. That's the absolute truth. Whatever you do, don't ever run from a guinea pig. I want you guys to remember that!" That's a great line! *Rolling*

"Well, with each step we took backwards, them guinea pigs took a bunch'a little guinea pig steps forward." OMG! You're killing me!!! *Rolling* *Rolling* *Rolling*

"Then I spotted something even more frightening than guinea pigs and rabbits. Hamsters! That's right. Wild ones! Thousands of 'em." *Laugh* *Rolling* I don't even know why I find this so hilarious, but it is!!!

"Get out, Teddy!' I screamed. 'Don't worry about me,' I said. 'For the love of God, save yourself!" The double quotation marks are mine. You used single. This should be punctuated as "Get out, Teddy!" I screamed. "Don't worry about me," I said. "For the love of God, save yourself!" You need a bunch of double and no single quotation marks. Also, you didn't even use the ones needed at the beginning and end. *Wink*

"It was my fault for not feeding my pets properly." Was it? Or was it your mom's fault for continuing to get your pets? *Laugh*

OMG! The ending! This was a fabulous twist I never saw coming and I loved it! What a fantastic story! Very well done! You're quite talented!

Remember that these (mostly positive) comments are my own opinion, so do with it as you wish. *Wink*

Thank you for sharing your story!! Keep writing!





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
3
3
Review of Miss Fit  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


Howdy! Me again! *Bigsmile*

I see this was written when you were a newbie, not BRAND new, but still, a newbie. How cute! *Inlove2*

"Contest. Short story written to a prompt and less than a thousand words." Uh, that's your description? No. Okay, I accept it's from a newbie. Actually, THAT is exactly why I looked to see when you joined and if you were a newbie when you wrote this. *Laugh* Yep, you were. *Wink* Anyway, you know you need to work on that description, right? lol

You listed Contest as a genre. Nope. And Contest Entry shouldn't be selected either, because no one looks for those when looking for things to read. *Wink* I'd suggest maybe Teen or Young Adult or Occult.

BTW, I forgot to mention after reading the other item (Forked Tongue) that you could use Supernatural or Love/Romance or Family as other options for genres. *Bigsmile*

"The therapists seemed to think she suffered from some sort of claustrophobia, but it was merely conjecture, they really didn’t know why she threw violent fits like she did." I'm pretty sure that should be a semicolon after "conjecture" because before and after are complete sentences. I'm pretty sure the rule is that if you can put a period, but don't want to, use a semicolon. *Bigsmile*

"Homeschool" is 1 word. *Wink* BTW, if you're homeschooled, you can get a real high school diploma, at least in the US. You work under the auspices of a high school or homeschool group and get the degree conferred by them, as I understand it. A GED is for folks who drop out of high school, not those homeschooled. The military will take homeschooled folks, but only during war or other personnel shortages will they take folks with a GED (unless they've since gone to college).

"At breakfast, her dad had madeher a cheese omelet." Obviously, separate "made" and "her." *Smile* And now I'm hungry. *Laugh*

Oh, I love that screen box idea! Smart! Though I would think the mosquitoes didn't care for the centrifugal force bit, but they can get attorneys to fight that. *Laugh*

The idea of collecting 100 mosquitoes is cool! I wouldn't want to do it, but good for her! She must have done it fairly quickly, though. I imagine they can't live weeks without food...or did she "feed" them? *Laugh*

"As she progressed, she couldn’t help but imagine each Mosquito as a tiny bit of energy that she gathered." Why is "mosquito" capitalized here? *Confused*

I'm not 100% sure I understand the ending, but it sounds hopeful, so there's that. lol You might need more words to make it clear, you know, now that you can add to this. lol

I like this story and would love for it to be fleshed out a bit more. Remember that my suggestions are only my thoughts on how your story could be improved. Take what you agree with and ignore the rest. *Wink*

Thank you for sharing your writing! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
4
4
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.0)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


I saw this and, naturally, wanted to read it...and thus, review it, since I'm here to do a review. lol I'm still working on my GoT reviews and this was another I decided the group of us late-comers had to do. *Bigsmile*

I see your item is quite popular! Well done! This has a LOT of reviews and I'm sure even more reads! Did you know you can see how many views your stuff has? Well, I can, but I'm not sure what your membership level is and what membership level is required. Anyway, click the gear and check things out. I forgot what it's called, but it's in there somewhere. *Laugh*

Anyway, I'm happy to see you've edited this at some point! *Delight* Sure, it was a very long time ago, but still, good job! I hope you update it again one of these days. *Bigsmile*

I don't get writer's block, IMO. God knows I have a TON of ideas, though I admit to sometimes struggling with an idea for a certain prompt. My main problem is getting motivated to write. *Yikes* Yeah, so THAT'S a thing I have serious issues with. Got a fix for that that doesn't require me to do anything? *Laugh* Anyway, I do know folks complain about not having ideas, so good for you for helping them! *Delight*

"Often you can get ideas from seeing something and you'd like to do something similar, or something regarding to something you've seen or read" -- You need a period here.

I especially love the idea about having a notebook to keep ideas in, though you don't mention to also carry around a pen. *Laugh* I have literally hundreds of ideas in my WdC Notepad. *Bigsmile*

"Having trouble coming up with names for your story?" I would change "story" to "character" because I thought you were talking about a title, but you mean a character name.

"If you're looking for more of a classical name, you can ask your grandparents, or maybe even your aunts and uncles, or maybe even your parents." You use "even" a lot in this whole piece. I counted 10 times. *Laugh* Maybe some of those can be changed or deleted. *Think* *Wink*

"If you want to give an old name a new twist, trying spelling it a different way. (ex: Simon = Psymon)" Fun spelling, especially for like a psychologist or something. *Rolling*

"If you would really like to incorporate an idea you don't know much on, this would be a great idea." I don't like the use of "idea" twice so close. Maybe "...this would be a great time to learn about it."

Another point about going to the library to learn is that sometimes the librarians are very knowledgeable and can point you to either the best resources or some unique ones you might not have thought to use.

I hadn't thought of TV as a tool for learning about what you want to write about, but you're definitely right. Good point! But I prefer the bit just before about learning from WdC. I recommend switching these 2 points and ending with learning from people and groups on WdC. Partly, this is a writing site, so it makes sense to end here, but also, it's just a stronger point to end on. *Wink*

I have a few ideas to add -- use a story prompt generator (there are lots on Google and WdC has one, too), go to Pinterest and look for story prompts, don't think about the plot first but try starting with a theme or character that you find interesting. For more ideas for unique or new names consider words as names, things like Talon or Quick can be interesting names.

Thanks for sharing your thoughts and ideas! Remember that my comments and opinions, good and bad, are only that -- my comments and opinions. Do what feels right for your item. *Heart* But I do hope you continue to expand this. It's a great resource. Thank you for sharing! *Delight*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
5
5
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


I'm reviewing this because I'm a late participant in GoT and all 3 late starters have to review the same 3 things, so you'll be getting 3 reviews of this. lol Also, I got to pick you and your items, so when I saw this, I immediately knew I wanted to read it and make us all review it! I love reading about the conventions. I wish we would have another, but I also know it's a HUGE PITA, so we probably never will again. But I'm glad you got to go when you did!

Oh, before I forget, I saw you said in your intro or bio or somewhere that you hoped to get something published before you die. Have you been working on that? I definitely encourage you to do so. *Smile*

I'm happy to see you chose all 3 genres. Good job! I hate when I see people not using all 3 or they choose useless things like Contest Entry or Other. With genres being the #1 way people search for something to read, those are just throwing away reader opportunities. People don't search those. *Pthb* Anyway, good job! Also, your description and the title were clear and enticing. Thanks for that!

In your first paragraph, you mention riding there and back with Wannabe, but you didn't tag them. *Think* I would assume they've since left the site and you just included them here for memories, but you never edited this item, so unless they left immediately after, I think maybe you forgot to tag them? Or you couldn't remember their username? Or they asked not to be tagged? IDK.

Oh, I see you're writing this as an 18-year-old! HOW FUN!!! Also, a bit of quick math and you're MUCH younger than I am. *Laugh* I didn't realize you would have to be 18 to go, but maybe that's without a parent? Surely with a parent, you're allowed to go? Or maybe not? *Think*

"It's definitely something you have to go and experience for myself." Oops! I think you mean "yourself" here. I can totally see me doing a mistake like that. lol

"...since I think it'll be more easier and gives away less." That should be "easier," not "more easier." But I'm sure in all the other reviews you've received, some folks have mentioned this, but you haven't edited it. I get it. I often don't bother editing, either. *Blush* *Facepalm* *Laugh*

Oh, I see you later tagged Wannabe. I guess you just forgot in the opening paragraph. *Wink*

Awww...I see some of your friends have since left the site. How sad. *Frown* Either that or you tagged them wrong. lol Nah, I checked and didn't see similar usernames. I think they've left the site. *Frown*

I see a few other times you didn't tag folks. Again, I'm guessing either you forgot or didn't know/remember their usernames.

We used to have a site mascot?!? What was Bessie? I assume she was the Story Family's pet, but a dog? That's my guess. I bet the whole site was upset when she passed away. *Cry*

Who got the Oldest Attending Member award? It sounds almost like it was you, but if you were 18, I'm guessing not. lol

Diane at the auction sounds hilarious! And also sounds like me. *Laugh*

"Tigger thinks of Prancer was such a hoot." Huh? I know Prancer is a member and assume Tigger is, too. But this sentence doesn't make sense to me. *Confused* Unless "Tigger Thinks of Prancer" was the name of some event or skit or something? *Think* IDK.

You had a "biff" war with Greg, but I have no idea what that is or what it means. A bit of explanation would be nice here. *Smile*

"Also, she does an awesome it." Uh, I assume you're talking about Winklett's impression of Edith? Maybe say she does "...an awesome impression." *Smile*

You mention the ride with Wannabe twice. *Laugh* Maybe delete one or say, "I know I already mentioned this..." lol

The last paragraph where you wrap up your thoughts and feelings about the convention is fabulous! Very well said! *Inlove2*

This review is only my opinion. Do with it as you wish. *Bigsmile* But I'm so glad you wrote this item! *Heart* Thank you for sharing it with us! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* Keep writing! I love it so much!




*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
6
6
Review of A Bit of Doggerel  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


I chose the items the 3 new GoT participants will be reviewing and when I read your description of this, I knew we had to read it. *Laugh* Great description, pulling me in immediately! *Delight*

For your genres, you did a better job here, but don't use Contest Entry. No one searches for Contest Entry when looking for stuff to read and it's not a Quills category, so it's basically a throw-away genre. Honestly, I'm not even 100% sure why we have it, except it was from the earliest days of WdC before he had all the sophisticated tracking to see who was doing what where and why. Not to mention, Quills didn't exist, not that SM would have not let us have Contest Entry because of "The Quills. *Laugh* Anyway, I'll read and see if I can suggest another...assuming I remember to by the end. I tend to read and review at the same time, then when I'm done, I'm done. *Angelic*

I see you put this in your Writer's Cramp Poems folder. You must enter that contest a LOT! *Laugh* Good job!

You found the rhyme Chevrolet? Wow! I wonder if you found that word first or if you picked Chevrolet to match May, which I would find impressive...unless it's listed on those rhyming websites, then it's less impressive. *Rolling*

He's got great eyes and she knows to be careful. Yep, nice eyes can suck you in! *Yikes* Good job, lady! *Angelic*

Dogs can be remarkably good judges of character, though not always, of course. But when I was in college, our priest had a German shepherd that had failed police dog training. There was 1 guy that dog couldn't stand, like he would growl at the guy. The priest and I always wondered if it was something about the guy (not that we could tell) or if maybe the guy simply reminded the dog of someone else, like maybe the guy in the big, fluffy outfit that the dog had to attack over and over. No idea, but I never saw the guy on the front page of the paper, so that's good. *Laugh*

The fact that the dog jumped into the guy's car is hilarious! Though I had that happen once and I was NOT happy. It was a rental and I'd signed a thing specifically saying I wouldn't have pets inside and worse, the dog's feet were muddy! *Sob* Yeah, I had to work hard after that. But in my defense, what rental car thinks it's a good idea to have TAN seats? I prefer black in my own, regardless of the heat. *Think* *Laugh*

Okay, cute ending, but it does leave me wondering about the description now. *Think* Yes, it lured me in, as it should. But now I feel a bit duped. *Think* *Yikes* I expecting more nonsense or absurdity. I would consider changing that, personally, just because it doesn't lead to appropriate reader expectations, IMO.

As for the other genre to use, I'd suggest Pets. But you can also probably go with Children's, if you want, IMO. *Smile*

Remember that my opinions are just my opinions. Take what you agree with and disregard the rest since it's your own writing. *Wink*

Great poem! I enjoyed this! Thank you so much for sharing! *Heart* You're so talented! *Delight*



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
7
7
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.


Howdy! I'm reviewing this as a part of my requirement to review 2 things from a yellow port along with 2 other late GoT starters, so you'll be getting 3 reviews of this item. BTW, I chose it for us to review. *Delight*

I see you've been here since 2011 and this was written in 2021. Any reason why you didn't fill out more genres? Really! Genres are so important to fill out! While it's too late for "The Quills now, if this was nominated in 2021, you could have only won a Quill for the poetry category it was nominated for and for Best Comedy. No matter how obvious it is that something belongs in another category, if the author didn't include it, it doesn't go. You missed out on 2 other potential Quills. *Sob* Mind you, not EVERY category gets Quills, but Other definitely doesn't. *Laugh* Another reason to use all 3 genre spaces is that genres are the #1 way people look for something to read (according to SM). Thus, you're losing 2/3 of your potential audience by listing only 1/3 genres. *Frown* But note that people don't search for Other or for Contest Entry, so don't use those. *Wink* You might want to consider Cultural. Food/Cooking is an obvious one. Holiday is another obvious genre you could use here. *Smile*

I love your description! I love that you tell us this was a winner and I love that you not only say that it was the last stuff left, but "even after the saltwater taffy" which I also always left. *Rolling* Great work!!

You say this is set to the tune of The Unicorn. I'm not familiar with this song. I'd recommend both including a link to a YouTube video using the "embed" tag and saying who the song is by so we know what to look up in case your video isn't available in our location. *Smile*

This is such a fun and hilarious poem/song! *Rolling* I absolutely love it and am so glad I found it! *Rolling*

The only line I'm unsure about is " We’d fill our bags and pillow sacks but to our great scorn." If this was a story, it's fine. But I feel like I lost the cadence of the lines when I got to this one. Since I don't know the tune, I can't take off stars if I'm right. *Wink* But it doesn't seem to flow like the rest, even when I read just the 3rd lines, which I assume should all go together when it comes to their rhythm. *Smile*

The other thing I question is calling it sugar porn. I thought sugar porn (or any other kind of non-porn, porn) was something good that you really wanted/loved. To me, that's the opposite of what you mean here. *Think* Oh, wait, and IDK if you can use "porn" with an ASR rating. *Yikes* I'd say that 1 word makes this at least 13+, if not 18+. *Yikes* You should at least change the rating, if nothing else. *Wink* I see 13+ says, "There may be mild references to sex..." so I think 13+ is okay. Also, I just realized as a Mod, I can (and should) change the rating. *Think* Consider it a service so you don't have to. *Laugh*

I really enjoyed the sort of trip down memory lane as you mention different types of candy, some of which I'd long forgotten. Thanks for that!

This was a wonderful piece! I really am glad I found it! So fun! Thank you for sharing it! I didn't make many suggestions, but those that I did, remember that this is your piece, so if you find them helpful, feel free to make changes. If not, ignore my opinions because they are just that -- my opinions. *Wink* But I do stand by my opinion that this is great! *Delight* I'm happy I got to read it! You're such a wonderful writer! Thank you for sharing your gift!



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
8
8
Review of Young Lassies  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.5)
The views and opinions on this review are mainly the things discovered by the reader and therefore, do not reflect necessarily to the group, activity and/or event being affiliated herein. This is only the opinion and suggestions of the reviewer and it is still up to the author of this piece to consider this review as a corrective action or otherwise.

This is being reviewed for


FORUM
Game of Thrones  (13+)
Returning in April - Prep starts March 1st
#456789 by Gaby ~ Keeper Of The Realm


House Lannister image for G.o.T.



Howdy!

I wanted to show you templates don't have to stifle your creative reviewing. *Delight* The part above the "howdy" is all template, as is the default size 4 font. The rest is my free-styling. *Bigsmile* But since this won't count, it's not nearly what GoT want for length. *Laugh*

Okay, let's get to it. *Bigsmile* First, your description, I love that you said it was your first limerick. Ah, you never forget your first... *Inlove2* Or so I hear... *Whistle* *Laugh* (BTW, all the ML code I'm including doesn't count. *Wink* But usually I only have to worry about 250 characters so the code is no big deal with as much as I write. But for a GoT review, I probably need to cut it down so I can keep better track of my ACTUAL character count. *Wink*) Anyway, while I love that include that it's your first limerick, I also want to know a bit about it. Yes, the title and the fact that it's a limerick does give most of that away, but maybe something like, "My first limerick -- Irish-inspired" or something, but maybe with fewer dashes used. *Yikes* *Laugh* *Rolling*

Next...You used Contest Entry as one of your genres. I really encourage you to change that. Comedy is a great choice. Entertainment is good. But there are several reasons you shouldn't use Contest Entry (or Other). (Note: These are good things to remember to mention in reviews you're going to do -- partly, because it genuinely helps the writer and partly, it fills space, in case you need it. lol)

1. When readers search for something to read, the #1 way they search is by genre and no one searches for Contest Entry (or Other) as a thing to read. *Yikes*

2. This was written this year so you especially want to change it in case it gets nominated for "The Quills. (Item alias is Quills so you can easily create a link with {item:quills}.) You can only be nominated for the Short Poem - Structured category. But you'll automatically be entered into whatever genres you've listed. Contest Entry isn't a Quills category (nor is Other) so you're cutting your odds of winning. You would have a chance at Short Poem - Structured (if you're nominated, of course) and Comedy and Entertainment (if that's a category next year, though TBH, it's usually not, but maybe). But Contest Entry is basically throwing away your 3rd genre/4th opportunity to win a Quill. *Sob* Since it's about Ireland, you could choose Cultural. Since it involves hair, maybe Fashion? Give the genres another look and see what you think might fit. (When reviewing, you can open the Genre's tab on the left side without losing your review since it's just a menu, not a new screen. *Delight* Also, a benefit to having a template is that you have a popup so you don't have to scroll up and down through the item and review. *Wink*)

I'm pretty sure I have a 3rd reason, but I can't think of it. *Think*

Anyway, for the limerick, itself, I'm not loving that last line. Partly, the cadence seems off to me, but it's also 1:30 am, so that could just be me. lol But the end rhyme isn't my favorite, either. Maybe 'Tis a bad hair day they're a styling." (Not sure how to write that a-styling? Whatever, hopefully you know what I mean.) Or maybe "'Tis not a day they are beguiling." Maybe "'Cause it's not a day they are beguiling." Or maybe even have it in quotation marks and say "'Cause it's not a day we are beguiling" so it's like the lassies are talking. *Bigsmile*

Anyway, that's enough fiddling and suggestions. *Laugh* Overall, it's a cute limerick and I do hope you do/did well in the contest you entered! *4leaf*

My favorite line is the 2nd one -- When taking a pic they’re not smilin’ -- because it's a more modern thing, taking pics, and so it caught me by surprise, which was fun. Nice work! I didn't expect that and that's always a nice surprise. *Heart*

I'm deducting 1/2 star for the genre, unenticing description, and the last rhyme, which I think could be better, IMO. *Blush*

Do know that these suggestions are my own opinions, not gospel. It's your limerick. Do what you think works best for it. By all means, I'm not a poet or even a professional reviewer. These comments are made with the intention of helping you grow, but do with them as you see fit. If they don't work, ignore them. *Wink* Take the good and leave the bad. *Smile*

Great work! Keep writing and if you enjoy limericks, definitely keep working on those. You have fun ideas! Thank you for sharing your writing! *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
9
9
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Wow! What a wonderful pic! I love it! Though from what you described, I thought the mouse was going to be wearing the cap. But this is great, too! You're the best and so sweet and thoughtful! I'm very glad we're friends. Thank you for being who you are because you are awesome! *Heart* *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* *Heart*
10
10
Review of I love you  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hey! I saw your request for a review and appreciate that you weren't exaggerating when you said this was short. *Bigsmile* I don't review much these days as I'm super busy with everything else, plus overseas ATM. But since there are things I can mention about this to help and it is short, I thought I'd send you a quick review. *Wink*

Nice title and description, but the description needs to contain an apostrophe because the love letter belongs to the teenager -- "A teenager's love letter was found."

You rated the item as 13+, which is probably correct. However, you listed the intro as Non-E. That's not correct and will prevent you from getting as many viewers as you can. Your intro is the description -- A teenager's love letter was found. That's rated E. If you said "A dead teenager's love letter was found," that wouldn't be rated E. But your INTRO is E, even though your item isn't. *Bigsmile*

You only listed 2 genres. I really encourage you to list all 3. Genres are the #1 way people search for something to read. Thus, if you only list 2, you could be losing 1/3 of your possible readers. *Yikes* Also, Moderators are required to include items from members in their Newsletters they write. How do they find items to include? Search, often a search of genres. So, while you don't get a notification of someone including your item in a Newsletter (unless it's written by me, but I don't write many, however I do notify everyone whose item I include in my Newsletters), you can be missing opportunities to be in Newsletters, which also means you're missing more readers as many readers will read things Moderators post in their Newsletters. *Bigsmile*

Also, we have an award thing (for lack of a better word) here called "The Quills. (Feel free to nominate anything written this year that you think is exceptional. Anyone can nominate items. *Bigsmile*) This would go in Best Flash Fiction. But if it got nominated, it would automatically get put in all the genre categories the author listed for a possibility of up to 4 Quills--1 for the main category and 3 for the genres. You can't nominate for a genre and, TBH, it's not uncommon for them to combine a few like Death and Dark are sometimes combined, for example. But you don't know until next spring what the genre categories will be, so you could be missing another chance to win a Quill if you don't include all 3 genres. *Shock2* *Sob*

Here are some you could use as your third genre: Dark, Drama, Emotional, Melodrama, Relationship, or Teen.

Do you know how to edit your items yet? Click the gear in the upper right corner of your item. I choose Quick Edit, but that's me. Be sure to save when you are done, of course. *Wink*

I like the intro--Today a letter was found. Though I think you need a comma after "today." But it's an enticing intro that makes me wonder about the letter. *Delight*

I would start a new paragraph or attach the next bit to the last sentence. It's starting a new line, but isn't a new paragraph, which seems a bit odd. *Think* After "It was neatly folded," you need a period or semicolon because both that and the following part are complete sentences.

I like that the letter was scented with vanilla, not roses or something more cliche. Nice touch! *Heart*

After "Gently" you also need a comma. *Wink*

The typos in the letter can be excused because they are, presumably, being written as they were in the letter. But in case you meant for your letter to be perfect, let me help. *Bigsmile* You'd want a period at the end of the first sentence and probably quotation marks around "I love you."

For the "love," I'm pretty sure you mean the "as" to be outside the quotation marks. *Think* *Bigsmile* Nice work on the comma before "please." I believe you need another comma after "beg."

You should probably capitalize the L and Y for "love" and "you" since they are beginning the sentences, if you want this to be grammatically correct. But it is a handwritten letter, written in distress, so it's not officially necessary, though you might get dinged for it in future reviews. *Think* You can also put a reminder at the top, preferably in gray so that it's not considered connected to the rest of the item, that reminds the reader that the letter isn't intended to be perfectly grammatically correct because it's written by a distressed teen. Your note at the top, if you put it in gray, would look like these words. To do that, click the rainbow button along the top of the text box. Highlight the part you want to note for the reader, then click the light gray button and it will put the ML code tags on the beginning and end of the part you highlighted. So while your reader would see as I posted above, you would see... {c:lgray}Your note at the top, if you put it in gray, would look like these words.{/c}

I like that your letter was found in your dead hand, but I think you can do better than just saying you were dead. I feel like you could express that better and leave it to the reader to figure out. Maybe something like, "This letter was found clasped in my cold hand" or something like that? Well, now that I write that, while I like the addition, I think I do like the obvious statement of "I was dead" at the end. *Blush* Whatever. Do what feels right for you. *Bigsmile* That, BTW, goes for all of this! I'm not a professional writer and these are all just my opinions. Do what works for you. *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

Thanks for sharing! This was a good read that caught me off guard at the end, my favorite kind of ending. *Bigsmile* Nicely done! Keep it up! *Delight*

Be sure to hang out on the Community Newsfeed so you make friends and eventually fans who will see your notes. Comment, Like, socialize, and start getting to know people on the Community Newsfeed. *Wink*

Thank you for sharing your wonderfully short piece! I rarely review, but was happy to do this for you since I think there were several places I could help you do a permanently better job here such as explaining about the intro rating and the importance of filling out all 3 genres. *Bigsmile* Keep writing! You're doing a great job! I'm so glad you joined us! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* Again, welcome to WdC! *Party*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
11
11
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hey!

I opened this in a tab the day you posted that you wrote it to explain more about what your book was about. I've FINALLY gotten around to reading it. *FacePalm*

Anyway, this was really interesting and you broke it down very simply. Wonderful work! I especially appreciated the variety of examples you gave. *Delight* Would it be too complicated to do some math to show how at least part of the problem in one of the examples could be solved? Maybe that's too complicated. I'm not sure.

Anyway, I do have the correction from the 3rd paragraph in the Examples section. *Angelic* "...waiting in line, getting served, waiting while getting serived..."

Also, no one searches "Other" as a genre. *Wink* Consider Reference, Business, or Educational as options for the other 2 slots. *Bigsmile*

I also recommend your description be expanded on. How about something like, "An Explanation of Stochastic Processes" or "What are Stochastic Processes and Why Do I Care?" (...if that will fit. lol)

Another suggestion I have is that if you can find a link to how to pronounce "stochastic," maybe include that. I don't think you have to be a foreigner to ponder that one. stoh-KAS-tik?

Thank you for creating this! You're fabulous! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
12
12
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I'm so sorry for your loss! *Hug1**Cry**Hug2* What a beautiful tribe to your grandson! *HeartBroken* I can't believe he was so young, but I know it happens. *Cry* I'm grateful that not only did he have the opportunity to serve, but that he also was apparently an organ donor and able to continue living through them. *Heart* What a wonderfully selfless act as his final gift to the world. Though I think my favorite line is, "A born soldier who answered the call" because I do believe some people were born Soldiers. *Salute*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
13
13
Review of A Writer's Prayer  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Wow! What a wonderful prayer and such a compliment to know you read and took my Newsletter to heart! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* I can't tell you how much that means to me! *Heart* I also love the Poet's Note. Of course, it's nice that I'm mentioned. *Blush* *Bigsmile* But also, I just love to know extra stuff about the items I read, so that's always fun. I see not only the form, but the inspiration. *Delight*

My only comment is that I think "your" (mentioned twice) should probably be capitalized since it's referencing God, but you might not have done that on purpose for some reason.

Anyway, thank you for sharing! What a wonderful poem and I love to see your love of God. *Pray* *Heart* *Pray*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
14
14
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Welcome to WdC! It's great to see you getting started so soon after joining. *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*

I found your story on Read & Review. (That's on the left side of the computer screen--you can earn extra GPs --gift points, the WdC version of money by reviewing items you find there.)

Remember that I'm not a professional reviewer. I'm simply another member of WdC. Take the comments I make with a grain of salt. Use what you find useful and ignore the rest. *Wink* It's your writing, so you know what's best for it.

Since you're new, I'll also be talking about WdC some in this review. *Bigsmile*

You don't need the quotation marks around your title. You also don't need the beginning quotation marks you have in the description. Good thing you forgot the ending ones. *Laugh*

Great job including all 3 genres! *Delight* There are people who have been here for years who still don't do that all the time. *FacePalm* Including all 3 genres is really important for a number of reasons.
1. The #1 way people search for things to read here is by genre.
2. Moderators write Newsletters here. They are required to include stories from other people. How do they find those? By searching, often for genres since we have several genre Newsletters. And even those that aren't about a specific genre, that edition might be about a specific genre, so they'll still search it.
3. We have an award, uh, thing (used to be a ceremony, but it was too much work, so now it's just awards handed out) called "The Quills. Items are nominated for categories like Best Flash Fiction, Best Nonfiction Short, etc. After an item is nominated, it is automatically put into the genre categories the author added. But no matter HOW OBVIOUS the genre is, if it's not listed by the author, the item isn't included in that category. So, even if it's a bit of a stretch, it's better to include a genre than to not include all 3. Though there are some that you shouldn't use much, if at all. Contest shouldn't be used unless you really created a contest that you plan on people entering and you'll be judging. Contest Entry shouldn't be used much, if at all, because it's not a genre people search for and it's not a genre category for "The Quills. If you REALLY want to remember that you wrote it for a contest, perhaps include that statement at the top of your item, along with a link to the contest, or at least a sentence saying which contest you entered. Activity is another you should only use if you actually created an activity for people to participate in such as a challenge. But even if you did, it's not wrong to not include Activity as a genre if you have 3 others that do fit well. *Wink* Never use Other. It's not a Quills category and no one searches it. I also don't recommend Writing.Com unless you're writing instructions on how to use the site or something like that. *Wink* Anyway, great job choosing 3 useful genres! *Delight*

Okay, to your writing...

Between paragraphs, I'd recommend leaving a blank space (like I do here) to give the eyes a place to rest. Your piece is short, so it's not a huge deal, but if you write longer things, they become too intimidating if there's not any blank space.

"The Philippines finds itself engulfed in the relentless onslaught of heavy rains, floods, and landslides, wreaking havoc and leaving a trail of destruction and tragedy in its wake. Here, we gather the key insights from our search results:" Good use of commas. They can be tricky to master, but you're doing well. *Smile*

"Numerous provinces in the Philippines have borne the brunt of this calamity, with lives lost and thousands of people displaced..." Since most people on WdC aren't from the Philippines nor have most ever even visited (though I have--great place, IMO), I encourage you to give more information about it. How many provinces are there? How many are impacted? How many lives are lost? If it's still ongoing, you can say X lives have been lost as of Y date, but as the rains, floods, and landslides continue, that number could continue to rise--something like that to give us an idea of the scale.

Under "Nature's Perfect Storm," what are "shear lines"? Maybe explain those?

WOW! 20 typhoons or tropical storms a year?!? See? This kind of number/description makes an impact, thus why I encouraged you to include numbers before. For such a small nation, that's a LOT of storms! What about including data on the amount of damaged caused on an average year and maybe also include a really bad year. Since this is a US site, while it's good to describe it in Filipino money, consider also putting it in US dollars so more people can understand it better.

I can see why the Philippines is worried about climate change. What about rising oceans? I assume that's a concern there as well.

"A Trail of Tragedy" needs numbers. If you can find some numbers on the average number of people who die from each thing on an average year or in the last couple of years, list the number, that would improve the impact, I think. I'm especially interested in in deaths from electrocutions. When you say that, I can see it as a thing that could happen, but TBH, it never occurred to me before because I've never seen or heard of anyone dying of electrocution in a flood. *Think* If you can give a better explanation of why this happens, that would be good, too. Does it happen everywhere and it's just not reported or is this something unique to the Philippines' power grid or something?

In "A Widespread Menace," you mention also the loss of livelihoods. Try to find some numbers about the loss to the economy or the number of people who are now out of work or something. Also, I don't think you need "A" and "The" with these titles. I think it reduces their impact, IMO.

"The Shattered Landscape" might be a better place to put how much money this costs in an average year. Also, I don't think you need "The" or "A" on any of these titles.

"A Tectonic Truth" is an AWESOME title! Great work! Maybe include how many earthquakes happen each year.

"In the face of these trials, the spirit of the Filipino people stands strong, resilient, and unwavering. Amidst the challenges that nature hurls their way, they strive to rebuild and renew, drawing strength from the unity that binds them together. As the tempest rages, they continue to stand tall, ready to face whatever tumultuous tides lie ahead." Powerful ending! Excellent job with that! The beginning and ending are really important. The beginning gets people interested in reading and the ending leaves a lasting impression, especially if it's a well-written ending. *Smile*

I know I made quite a few suggestions, but overall, I think this is a really good piece. Yes, there are some things you can do to improve it, but in general, I think it's well done. I like the way you have the information divided up. It's simple and easy to understand. Consider using the Bold tags to make the section headers (or whatever you call them) bold. *Smile* You can highlight them, then click the capital B in the box at the beginning of the row of buttons at the top of your item. That will put bold tags {b} and {/b} at the beginning and end of what you want bolded. It's a quick and easy way to create code. *Wink*

If you haven't already discovered how to edit, click the gear in the upper right corner of your item and I use Quick Edit, myself. Another window will pop up so I can see the old and new together. *Bigsmile* Then I make my changes and scroll down to save them when I'm done. *Smile* There are a lot of older adults on this site, so you can also consider putting this is size 3.5 or 4. To do that, you can click the button with the 3 S's that are gradually getting larger (next to the cursive F, which is where you can choose different fonts, if you care to). When the size buttons appear below the top row of buttons, you can highlight the entire thing (be careful not to accidentally hit something and delete the whole item--if this happens, DO NOT SAVE IT, but just close that edit box and start again), then after you highlight everything, you can choose the font size you want. Then you will discover the beginning of your item will now have {size:4} (or whatever you chose) at the beginning of it and {/size} at the end. *Smile* Just so you can see, here's what some of the font sizes look like.

This is just the normal font. I believe it's size 3.
This is the font size of 3.5. Some people choose this.
This is the font size of 4. This is also a good choice, but it's up to you.

You're not obligated to enlarge the size, but older eyes might appreciate it. *Wink*

Overall, this is a good piece. It can be made better with some more research, which would include numbers, and just adding some finishing touches like spaces between paragraphs. I'm glad I came across this. Nicely done! It can be even better, but you should be proud of what you did.

Thank you for bringing this situation to people's attention. And thank you for sharing your writing! Stay dry and stay safe! *Heart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
15
15
Review of Lilac Rose  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Welcome to WdC! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* Great job posting a story so soon after joining...and this might not even be your first. I don't know. It just came up on Read & Review (on the left side of the computer screen where we can earn even more GPs--gift points, the WdC version of money--for reviewing people's items). *Bigsmile*

Remember that I'm not a professional reviewer, so take my thoughts and opinions with a grain of salt. *Wink* Take what you find useful and ignore the rest. *Smile*

I would like to see a better description. Yes, this is a fairy tale, but what's it about? More description might draw in more readers. *Smile* Maybe say "A fairy tale about magic, fairies, and unicorns" or "A fairy tale about how Lilac Rose because Queen of the Fairies" or something like that.

Also, you can advertise on the Newsfeed as well. Granted, when you are new, you don't have many people (if anyone) who has clicked your plus sign to follow you. Note: Double clicking is best when you decide to follow a person because it notifies them that you've become a fan and some people, like me, will reward their fans or even fan you back. If you only click their plus sign once, they aren't notified so you can't get rewarded. *Frown* And to clarify, I'm talking about the plus you see after people's names sometimes such as...
Schnujo is Late to Lannister

Anyway, a few of us get on the Community Newsfeed where you can see what everyone is posting (within your rating limit, of course), regardless of if you have clicked their plus sign or not. *Smile* I highly recommend you get on the Community Newsfeed so you can see more of what's going on beyond your tiny corner of WdC. When you click Newsfeed, it takes you to your Personal Newsfeed by default. Here you will only see official WdC notes as well as things by anyone whose plus you have clicked at least once (but preferably twice). To find the Community Newsfeed, click Newsfeed, then along the top of your Personal Newsfeed, click "View the Community Newsfeed." Then start scrolling. Like, comment, and start making friends. *Smile* It takes time, but as people start noticing you commenting on their notes more and more often, they'll look forward to you and may eventually click your plus. Then you're on your way to having your own following! *Bigsmile*

Anyway, back to your fairy tale... *Angelic* Good job filling in the genres of Fantasy and Children's, but you want to avoid Other. *Pthb* There are several reasons for this. Mostly, Other doesn't do anything for you. *Think* Genres are the #1 way people here search for something to read. Probably no one searches "Other." They're looking for something specific. Try to find another option. *Wink* Along those same lines, we have Newsletters here written by Moderators. Mods are required to include writing from other people in their Newsletters. How do they find other writings? By usually by searching genres...sometimes with a keyword as well. I would encourage you to fill in the keywords, if you didn't do that as well. *Wink* Some keywords you can use would be fairy tale, fairy tales, fairies, fairy, unicorn, unicorns. Honestly, I'm not 100% sure if you need both the plural and the singular when using keywords, but if you have room, use both, I guess, and if you don't have room, don't *Laugh*. You don't need to put "and" before the last one--actually DON'T use "and" or the computer will be confused and will only show your item when someone searches "and unicorns" not just "unicorns." *Pthb* Anyway, choose keywords about specific points or characters or whatever. You can choose other keywords, but these are examples of what I'd put, personally. *Bigsmile* So, if a Moderator was going to write about unicorns in children's literature in a Newsletter, they might find this if you include "unicorn" as a keyword and use Children's as a genre because they might search the Children's genre for the word "unicorn." Or if they are just going to talk about writing fantasy stories, they might find this by searching the genre "Fantasy."

Another reason to include all 3 genres is that we have a competition here called "The Quills. It's an annual award uh...thing (used to be a ceremony, but not starting last year because it's so much work). If a person nominates something for a Quill Award (this would qualify for Best Flash Fiction because of the length, if someone wanted to nominate it), it will automatically be put in the genre categories for Children's and Fantasy. But you'd be missing a chance for a 3rd genre opportunity, thus a 4th chance to win a Quill. You can't nominate for genres. The items automatically go into the genre categories after being nominated for another Quill. But no matter HOW OBVIOUS it is, if a genre isn't listed on the item, the item isn't put in that genre category to win a Quill. *Frown* Always do your best to fill out all 3 genre options. *Bigsmile* Consider maybe Animal or Nature as a 3rd genre. No, they aren't perfect, but they can get you more visibility. *Wink* Some categories to avoid are Contest (unless you created a contest for people to enter), Contest Entry (unless you simply want to remember that you wrote it for a contest, but I think if that's the case, you're better off simply saying so in the item), Activity (unless you created an activity for people to participate in here), and Writing.Com (unless you're writing about WdC, maybe instructions on how to do something or whatever). I recommend avoiding these simply because they aren't categories that you can win a Quill in, in case you are nominated one day. *Wink* (Well, you can win if you list your contest you create as Contest and the same thing with Activity, if you create a challenge or some other activity, because there are Best Contest and Best New Contest, etc. But in general, avoid these genres. *Wink*)

Okay, to your actual item... lol

Good use of commas in your opening sentence.

Lilac Rose is a beautiful name! *InLove2*

Maybe consider including how her parents treated her unkindly. Give us an example or two. Was she made to work all day from sun up to sun down with no food or drink? Did they beat her? Was she put to bed with no dessert when they ate dessert? Show us a little about her life. *Smile*

"The child wandered for days eating the berries from the bushes. She found herself in a totally different world." I'd like some sort of a transition word here. Maybe "Eventually she found herself in a totally different world." It's weird that she ate berries and then she found herself in a totally different world. I don't think it's because of the berries. *Laugh* I'm sure it's from the wandering, but make it more clear for the reader. *Smile*

I'm not sure you need quotation marks around "The Enchanted Forest." Is it something that's titled and talked about in her other world? Even if it is, you can probably still just say it without quotation marks because they suggest that maybe that's the name, but perhaps it's not really enchanted. But we know it is (because I read ahead *Laugh*). *Bigsmile*

"They stared at each other in amazement, then smiled." I like this part. Yes, it's simple, but sweet. *Heart*

"After hearing Lilac Rose’s story of her mean parents and wonderful journey in the forest..." Was Lilac Rose's journey through the forest really wonderful? She was wondering for days and eating berries. I picture her worried and scared. If it was a wonderful journey, show us more of that. Maybe she got to bathe in crystal waters, being clean for the first time in years or perhaps she enjoyed napping among the flowers. Maybe the berries were the first time she'd ever eaten something sweet? What made the journey wonderful? Or remove that word. *Laugh*

You said--Deeper and deeper into the forest they went. Lilac Rose said, “no one in the world could possibly know this beauty exists..." You need to capitalize the N in "No" because it begins a quote from someone.

"As they rounded the curve, Lilac Rose saw the most beautiful creatures she had ever seen in her life." Consider creating a new paragraph here since this is beginning a new idea--the introduction of the unicorns. *Smile*

I'm pretty sure that should have a hyphen as "mid-forehead" when you are describing the unicorns.

I really like how you don't just SAY they are unicorns. You describe them as horses at first and leave the discovery of them being unicorns to a brief moment later. You could extend this out even more by having the horn hidden in some way. Maybe they are facing away from her so she can't see them well? Or perhaps they are among trees so she can't get a good look at them? I don't know, but I think it might be nice to save that surprise for another sentence or two. *Delight*

Sparkle seems more like a girl's name to me, but that's just my opinion. *Laugh* Name your unicorn what you want. *Bigsmile*

"Lilac Rose’s story was repeated once again, and the beautiful creature, whose name was Sparkle, welcomed her into their family of fairies, and yes, unicorns!" You seem to have REALLY mastered commas! Great work! Those are tricky little things that give writers no end to their grief! I'm very impressed with your command of them! Fabulous!

Nice story with a sweet ending. *Smile*

I know I made a lot of suggestions, but remember--these are just my own thoughts. Do what's best for your story. *Smile*

Good luck and welcome to WdC! Thank you for sharing your writing! If you'd like me to re-review this after you've made changes, let me know. *Smile*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
16
16
Review of Meet Me There  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Thank you for sharing your story with us! This review is only my opinions, so do with them as you see fit. *Wink*

I don't fully get the title and how it fits with the story, unless Joe is running from his pain and has decided to stop, but we don't actually see that in the story, that he was running. Yeah, I should have mentioned that last time. *FacePalm* SORRY!

Great job selecting all 3 genres! *Delight* I'm not sure I fully get the paranormal one, unless she's sort of taken him over, as he's hearing her laugh and seeing his smile, but I'm not convinced that's exactly what happened. This doesn't seem dark and creepy enough for that. *Think*

I like how we start with a stray leaf rolling out of Larry's yard. One could imagine that's symbolic of Sarah. You could amp that up (if you have the space in your word count) by saying something like a "dead leaf" or even a "stray dead leaf" or something much more creative. *Laugh*

I believe you need a comma between "eyes" and "against" in the 2nd paragraph. I think this because if you remove "against my will," the sentence still makes sense. I forget what that's called, but I think if you can remove a part like that, then it means you put a comma on both sides of it. At least, that's what I think the rule is. If you have Grammarly, check with it. *Bigsmile*

If it's only been a week since Sarah died, I'm offended. What's wrong with Larry that he wants Joe to move immediately?? What is that funding for and how badly do they need it? His friend needs time to grieve and when you experience a big loss like that, you're not supposed to move for a year. Shame on Larry! I wonder if he's really looking out for Joe or if he's a selfish jerk. *Think*

I like how Larry doesn't get to finish his word. Great detail! So often people are cut off in the middle of a word in real life, but in stories, we like the tidiness of them finishing the word, and maybe even the sentence, before we "cut them off." Great work here!

I also love the ending with the blackbird nodding and flying away. Wonderful work!

Fabulous work on this story! I can't believe your not a native speaker. You write virtually perfectly. *InLove2* Wonderful story, which is hard to do in such a very short space. Great work! Keep it up! Thank you for letting me read this. *Smile*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
17
17
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Your contest has really come a long way since it was first created! *Delight* Well done! *InLove2*

You've got a descriptive title, appropriate rating, 3 genres, large enough font for the many older members, clear instructions, and a nice use of color without being overpowering. *Delight* Wonderful work!

This will be my last review because your item is nearly as perfect as I can make it. Everything in this review is now just me being super picky and isn't impacting the rating, obvously. *Bigsmile*

The 1st line bugs me each time I read it. I've tried to ignore it because there were bigger problems and because it's not wrong. But it sounds awkward to me. Though it could simply be a difference between where I'm from and where you're from. *Laugh* You have "We all have misheard..." but for me, I think "We have all misheard..." sounds more natural. *Think* Again, this review is being super picky. *Wink*

Consider centering that line and the one below it since they are at the top, introducing the contest. It's not bad how you have it and it might not look any better with my suggestion. *Think* *Laugh* But I think of those 2 lines like an intro/title of sorts and think I'd like them centered...maybe. Try and see what you think. It might then throw off the next bit that's not. I can't say for sure until I see it. *Angelic*

With the other usages, I agree with you choosing "malapropism," but I feel like when it comes to the definition portion (which is really well done, BTW), you might should use "malaprop" instead. But I'm not sure about the parts of speech here so I could be wrong...and I'm too lazy to look to see. *Blush* *FacePalm* But you're using "mondegreen," not a "mondegreenism," so I think maybe define "malaprop" instead of "malapropism." *Bigsmile* Okay, I did look it up and am still a bit confused about which you "should" use, but I still think it's "malaprop." *Angelic* Also, when reading, the example they used was "Jesus healed the leopards." *Rolling* *Rolling* *Rolling*

Be sure your comma placement outside the quotation marks in "for all intensive purposes" is correct because it bugs me. *Laugh* It's wrong in American English, but perhaps it's correct for British English. *Angelic* In US English, commas and periods always go inside the quotation marks. But I know in British English, it's not always the case. I think it depends on the usage, if I recall.

Your mondegreen example always amuses me. *Rolling*

Consider putting some spaces after your definition of "mondegreen," before you say which round this is and when entries are due. That part isn't really connected to the part above. *Wink*

So, you'll post prompts at noon WdC time, but they are due at midnight? Cool. Seems simple enough and if you are near WdC time, you're not having to stay up all night just to post the next prompt on time. *Laugh*

Are you sure you want to lock yourself into judging those 2 days? Very few people (if any) post the exact days they'll be judging because things come up and expectations are set. If the can't be met, people are disappointed. If it takes you 4 days to judge and you have these dates posted, people will be unhappy. If you have nothing posted about judging, people won't notice and certainly won't think your judging is "late." *Wink* Things come up. You might not be feeling well. You might win an all expenses paid trip to a foreign country but the dates are July 14-16... *Think* *Laugh* *Bigsmile*

I like that you accept vicarious stories as well. *Smile* That opens up opportunities for folks because we only have so many examples. You could consider a future round, when people have exhausted their real world examples, where people can write fake stories that include them...just a suggestion for a future round. Though I still think you won't be able to get too many rounds out of this if you run it monthly. It's a fun idea, but there are limited entries possible from our lives. *Pthb*

Consider not putting spaces between the sentences where you are talking about how to post the links since all that goes together. *Think* Also, when telling folks where to find the entry ID number, consider "...not at the top of the item for the book as a whole" instead of "...not for the book as a whole." Also, you need a period at the end of this, whether you opt to change it or not. *Laugh* You and your randomly missing periods. *Laugh*

I love that you bolded just the 13+ and not the whole line regarding the rating. I think that's not commonly done, but actually makes the rating stand out more than bolding the whole line. Excellent choice that I hope to remember to suggest for folks in the future. *Bigsmile*

Ohhhh...I FINALLY understand your "Note." I thought I did, but just realized I didn't. *FacePalm* I thought the bit about previously written stuff was just an aside, but no. It's referencing the previous bit about things not needing to be written during the contest timeframe. I thought that 1st part was saying you could write it after, but you could also enter previously written stuff, but if you write it and enter late, it won't be judged. *FacePalm* Yeah, I've read this several times now and JUST understood what you meant. I'd rework that part. *Think*

Maybe just delete that first part about it not needing to be written in the timeframe of the round (since I thought that meant it could also be written after the round *Blush*) and just say "Previously written items are accepted." And you can tighten up the next part by saying, "Late entries are not accepted."

Good job putting the "under 500 words" in bold so people understand that you REALLY mean 499 is the max. *Wink* I love that you are clear about how you'll be checking the word count. *Heart* Consider adding something about author notes, links to your contest, and other parts of the item that aren't the story will not be counted as a part of the word count.

Consider suggesting people link back to your contest and giving them the link for it using the double braces method so they can just copy and paste the link. It might help you get another entry or two if someone reads/reviews someone's entry and are like, "What a fun story." They can also be like, "Oh, it's written for a contest? That's cool. Let me check it out!" *Delight* You never know... *Bigsmile*

Yeah, I know. I'm giving ideas you might want to have incorporated into the 1st revision. *FacePalm* I'm not the best reviewer and am clearly not great at coming up with all the ideas on the first try. *Blush* *Laugh*

A note about the ribbons, the ribbons at the very bottom of the awardicons, the ones that are like a strip of ribbon folded onto each other, those are intended for awareness-type items, not for regular awards. People don't always know that and will award them as a regular awardicon instead of for items that are specifically like a story about breast cancer getting the pink Breast Cancer Awareness ribbon. I know this because not only have I seen it, but in the very beginning, I did it. *FacePalm* It's technically fine, but it's not what those ribbons were originally intended for. The more regular looking award-y ribbons just above them are the ones you should probably use in most cases when handing out awards. *Bigsmile*

Here's another idea that just came to me. *Headbang* (Sorry I can't think of all my ideas on the 1st review. *Blush*) You could post all the previous winners in a dropnote. That might be fun for people to read. Of course, from time to time, a person will delete something and you'll see the blue "invalid item" thing pop up and so you'll need to delete that, but still, since your entries are short and probably regularly funny, it might be a great idea to add. You can post them as a bitem or not. But I wouldn't do a regular item entry, personally, unless you said "written by ____" just because I think it's nice to recognize the writer. Actually, if you did that, tagging the author, even if they delete the item you could just change it to "Deleted item written by Schnujo is Late to Lannister ." Optionally, you can use the item-type link that includes the author's name--litem. It looks like "The Contest Challenge"   by Schnujo is Late to Lannister . But when the author deletes the item, you have no idea who entered what. Whereas if you post the item and the author separately like "The Contest Challenge by Schnujo is Late to Lannister, you at least know who won if they delete their tiem.

In my contest, "The Whatever Contest -- Closed for Now, I post all the people who entered each round (but don't include their entries--didn't occur to me to do that when I 1st got started) and when I declare winners, I put the little gold, silver, and bronze trophies next to the names (you would only use the gold one, of course *TrophyG* = {e:TrophyG}) and HM by them if they get an honorable mention. Naturally, you don't have to do this, but it's what I do. *Wink*

Do you know how to create dropnotes, in case you want to do that to post all entries or to post winners?

{dropnote:"Previous Winners"}
July 2023 Round
FORUM
The Contest Challenge  (13+)
Join by entering a contest a month for 12 months--Win Badges! Catching up is allowed!
#2109126 by Schnujo is Late to Lannister

{/dropnote}

Okay, yeah, my challenge isn't a legit entry. I'm using it for illustrative purposes. *Laugh* Anyway, no pressure to post previous entries or winners. Most contests don't. However, your contest entries are short and I would imagine many are hilarious, so I think it would be fun to include that. *Delight* Also, remember there are different ways to tag folks, if you choose to post their item and their name separately so the winner isn't lost if they delete their item. There are a variety of ways to tag, but the 3 most common are user, suser, and huser. In case you aren't familiar, here they are...

{user:schnujo} = Schnujo is Late to Lannister

{suser:schnujo} = Schnujo is Late to Lannister

{huser:schnujo} = Schnujo is Late to Lannister

Most folks prefer suser for this type of thing (and for most things, though I tend to lean towards huser, but in this, I'd probably do suser as well). But you choose what makes you happy, if you do this at all. *Bigsmile*

This is me being uber picky. *Blush* It bothered me from the start and continues to do so, but I thought it was being too picky and there were so many other things to address in previous reviews, that I left it alone. But it still bothers, me and you have so little to think about changing now, that I'm going to bring it up. *Think*

Your Judges section--I'd prefer either the whole thing be together without spaces between you and the "and" and Empathy or there being a space between "The judges of this contest will be" and you. I prefer them all together without spaces (or so I think without seeing it lol) since they are all part of the same idea, but I'm also okay with the spaces, if it's all spaced out. But as it is, it just bugs me. Yeah, I know. I'm being completely ridiculous. *FacePalm* *Laugh* Well, that's what you get when I review--RIDICULOUS! *Rolling*

The contest page is looking FABULOUS!!! (Despite the really long list of suggestions I made for possible corrections. *Laugh*) You've done a fabulous job with this! *Delight* I love it and am so happy to see it come so far! *Heart* I also appreciate that you take so many of my comments and implement them. *Bigsmile* I hate when I put a LOT of time and effort into a review (as I do with pretty much every one, which is why I hate reviewing so much lol), but then the person doesn't do anything with it. *FacePalm* Granted, if they didn't ask for the review, that's on me. Also, I hate revising things, so if it's not an activity like my contest or challenge, I also don't usually do anything to fix it up, even after a review. *Blush* But still...don't be a Schnujo. *Angelic* *Bigsmile* *Laugh*

Great work on your contest! And I see you have a few entries now as well. YAY! *Party* Fantastic! Good luck and have fun with your entries!!! And remember, if you find anything that you absolutely LOVE, feel free to nominate it for "The Quills through "Quill Nomination Form 2024. *Smile* Also, consider you and your co-judge (ignore the made up word *Laugh*) doing reviews for the items. Though if you do, I strongly recommend not giving 5 stars to anything or at least not until you've chosen a winner. If you have 2 people who get a 5-star review, but you only choose 1 to be the winner (though you can always have a tie, of course), the other person will question why they didn't win if their item was also 5 stars. Yep, it not only happens, it makes sense. *Wink* So, I tend to give everything 4 1/2 stars (or less) when judging because I can nearly always find SOMETHING wrong. Then I can freely choose the winner from among the 4 1/2 star items. *Wink*

If you decide to review every item, I'd put that on the contest page since people tend to love that. *Wink*

If you are looking for reasons to choose one over another and give it words (because sometimes we know we like something better, but it's hard to say why), you can say things like the title wasn't attention-grabbing, the description wasn't interesting, they didn't include all 3 genres (though they could argue that that's not a legit reason not to choose them as a winner and I would agree, but still, it's a thing you can comment on and give them reasons for why it's important to include all 3 genres--it's the #1 way people search for items to read or review, Mods search for Newsletter items using genres, and you're automatically entered into all the genre categories you list if your item is nominated for "The Quills...now back to the reviewing list), parts were confusing, they language was to wordy (things like "He said that he was hungry" instead of "He said he was hungry" though doing that once might not knock a person from the winner's circle, but a lot could), it wasn't clear who was speaking, the descriptions weren't useful to the story (with only 499 words, every bit needs to play a part--even if it's only adding interest), the rating wasn't correct (in your case, they'll probably rate something higher than necessary--again, probably not a reason to not allow them to win), punctuation or spelling is off (but remember British and American English are annoyingly different *Laugh*), etc...meaning I can't think of any more examples. *Laugh*

Okay, now that your eyes are probably bleeding from my excessively long review, I'll let you go. Great work on this contest! It's looking fantastic! *Delight* Good luck getting lots of entries and remember that though not every entry is Quill-worthy, if you find anything that is, it should be nominated for "The Quills. *Bigsmile* (You can click the plus sign in the upper right corner of the item to keep up with it better because it will then appear in your favorites--same with "Quill Nomination Form 2024 or you can just remember the item alias, {item:quills} and {item:quillnominate}. (That 2nd one is singular.) If you can't remember all that, just try to remember {item:quills} because you can find the nomination form on there. *Wink* You'd nominate for Best Flash Fiction. The genres are an automatic thing. We can't nominate something specifically for Best Comedy. And if they don't have Comedy listed as a genre, no matter HOW hilarious it is, it won't win Best Comedy without Comedy being listed in the genres. *Wink*

Okay, really, I'm winding things up now (for like the 3rd or 4th time *Laugh*). Wonderful work on this! Keep it up! Good luck getting lots of great entries!
18
18
Review of Meet Me There  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hey!

I saw your note on the Newsfeed asking for opinions, so while I don't normally review, I thought I would this time. *Bigsmile* Remember that these are only my own opinions. Take the ones you find useful and ignore the rest. *Wink*

First, I want to address the genres. You should always do your best to fill all 3 genres. Though good job not filling this with Contest Entry (or worse, Contest or Activity) or Other. *Smile* Those are all worthless genres to choose. (Well, Contest or Activity aren't, IF this were a contest or an activity, but it's not. *Wink*) But there are several reasons you want to fill out all 3.

1. The most common way for people to search for something to read here is by genre. If you don't have all 3 genres filled out, you could be missing out on 1/3 or, in this case, even 2/3 of your potential readers.

2. Moderators write the Newsletters. (If you haven't checked them out, definitely do.) Each Newsletter contains usually 5-10 items from around the site. How do the Comedy, Romance, Mystery, etc. Newsletter editors find items to include? They search by genre, of course. *Delight* But if you don't have all 3 genres filled out, you're missing a possible chance to be chosen for a Newsletter. *Sob* (Note that for some reason, Newsletters don't tag you when your item is selected. I'm not sure why, but if you don't scan every Newsletter every issue, you might be highlighted in one and not even know. *Pthb*)

3. If someone nominates an item of yours for "The Quills, such as in the Best Flash Fiction category, it automatically is nominated for each genre category listed as well. However, no matter HOW OBVIOUS the genres are for an item, if they aren't listed, it doesn't go into that category. So, not only are you missing out on readers and opportunities to be highlighted in Newsletters, but you're missing out on possible Quill Awards. *Shock2* *Sob*

So, fill out those genres as best as you can, even if it's not a perfect match. Something is better than nothing because it still brings in readers, etc. Of course, don't choose something totally unrelated... *Think* Some of my suggestions for this one are Dark, Death, Drama, Relationship, Romance/Love, and Tragedy. Choose what you feel best fits. *Smile*

Okay, now to the actual item. *Bigsmile* In the 2nd and 3rd paragraphs (if you can call them that lol), you use "up" twice. I think it sounds redundant. But it's also not necessary, IMO. If you leave it out of the 2nd one, when you say the bird is on the powerline, we probably assume you are not, so we figure you looked up.

I love rock climbing, but I only do it inside. At first, it was because I don't like spiders, snakes, getting sweaty and dirty, etc. But now it's from the shear danger of it. I lost a cousin (made nation-wide news a few years ago because he was a Green Beret who died when the anchor gave way while he was climbing something called the Army Trail with his BFF, another Green Beret on the 4th of July weekend) and my ex-boyfriend lost his brother. He was supposed to go climbing with him that weekend, but he'd just met a new girl (why we'd broken up...but that's another story *Irritated*) and decided to spend time with her instead of going climbing with his brother. His brother had a tendency to climb without safety gear, but my ex- always made him wear it. He carried a lot of guilt for many years after that. *Cry* Climbing is super fun, but I only climb in gyms where it's (at least somewhat) safer. *FingersCrossed*

I digress...

The ending is intriguing, but also confusing. I don't fully get it. So, Joe is the person in the swing, right? Was he romantically connected to Sarah? That's the feeling I get. But who is Larry? Larry is the owner of the house with the swing? Or the former owner? And he's related to Sarah? A brother, maybe? And how does the house figure into funding? They need to sell the house to get funding? Ohhh...Okay, I'm getting it now. Though rereading it like 5 times didn't do it, but typing it up did. *FacePalm* *Laugh* So, Larry is the next door neighbor and trying to get Joe to move after the death of Sarah, presumably his wife or girlfriend or something, though I suppose she could be an older daughter. They need funding for something and Larry wants Joe to sell his house (not sure what kind of a friend wants his friend to sell his house when he's not selling his own for funding as well...though maybe he is). Joe doesn't want to sell it. Okay, I think that's right. *Bigsmile*

When Joe picks up the phone, you have a comma. That should either be a period or the next line should be with it. Since we don't get to hear the phone ring (a little confusing to me as to who was calling whom, but I know you have limited word availability), so consider...

Her laugh, her smile on my lips.

I picked up the phone, "Hey, Larry, I'm sorry."

Though I think you might be allowed to also do...

Her laugh, her smile on my lips. I picked up the phone, "Hey, Larry, I'm sorry."

Oh, I'd been assuming Larry had called Joe, but I just realized Joe called Larry. *FacePalm* Even the best-written short things can be confusing due to a lack of space. *Headbang* So, if Joe is calling Larry, I'd go with the 2nd option unless someone says that's not allowed. *Bigsmile* Maybe try something like "I grabbed my phone to make the call, 'Hey, Larry, I'm sorry.'" You'll need 2 more words. Deleting one of the times you used "up" will help. You can combine something in the next sentence since it's dialogue. Instead of "We're going to have to get our funding somewhere else," you could say, "We're gonna have to get our funding somewhere else." BAM! Back down to 300 words! *Party* *Laugh*

I love the ending with the blackbird nodding and flying away. *Delight*

I enjoyed this short piece, but as you see, I did find some parts a bit confusing. But for the most part, it's really well done and I enjoyed it. Keep working on this and, if it's for a contest, good luck! *4leaf* It's a nice story that piques my interest in whatever their business venture (I assume) is. I want to know! Did you have something in mind when you wrote this? *Laugh* What were they going to do with the money they need???

Nice story! Keep on writing! You obviously know how to hook a reader into caring for the characters and wanting to know what happens next. *Laugh* Expertly done on that part! *Bigsmile*

If you make some changes and want me to rereview this, let me know. *Smile*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
19
19
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | N/A (Review only item.)
I'm not 100% sure if you have to be a paying member to get an Achievement (I assume that's what you meant) for posting something in your portfolio (I assume that's what you were talking about). I didn't think so. They can go to My Account and then Achievements (under My Activity) to find out and teach us all something. *Bigsmile*

Good job not using your cheat sheets as much! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* I knew you could do this! *Delight*

Your friend definitely writes like a writer. *Laugh*

You specifically asked about the blue and the GIF. I think the blue is fine, especially since it appears you might have done this in the font size 4, which is what I try to remember to do things in, but I often forget. *Facepalm* As for the GIF, I'm not a huge fan of GIF, though I admit I use them, myself. *Blush* The constant movement is distracting to me. *Pthb* I prefer them more on a page like a contest or fundraiser where I'll slide past it as fairly quickly. It adds something, but is annoying when you're forced to see it too long and it's distracting when I'm trying to read. I tend to just enlarge the page (I have a touch screen) and slide things so that I can't see it. *Bigsmile* But GIFs do add something, so while a few of us might have a problem with them, I wouldn't say to specifically stop using them. *Wink*

The only real criticism I see is that you have your intro as rated non-E. Your intro is your item's description. The description is just "tracker's blog," which is definitely rated E. *Bigsmile* You could be missing readers if you mislabel that. *Wink* Otherwise, great work, especially in bringing in new members! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
20
20
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Fun Fact: If you forget to clear the rating before you start typing your review, it erases the review you currently have just written. *FacePalm* Lesson learned. *Pthb*

Yeah, I know it's not important and I keep picking apart the back end of the madlib, but hey, this is the level of (low quality) reviewing you get from me. *Laugh* Anyway, for the most part, the back end is now looking great! The only thing I'd suggest is that you have foods as Food1, Food2, Food3, but you have places (or was it things? now I forgot, but I think it's places) as Place1, Place, and Place2. I'd switch that to Place1, Place2, and Place3. *Bigsmile*

How have I NOT noticed all this time that you only have 2 genres?!? *FacePalm* I'm so sorry about my quality of reviewing. *Blush* That's something I normally always comment on. *Headbang* I assume you're aware that it's important to use all 3 because people search most often using Genre. Also, Mods search for a specific genre to use in their Newsletters. And finally, if this were to get nominated for "The Quills, it gets automatically entered into the genre categories listed, but it's not nominated for any category that's not listed, no matter HOW obviously it fits in that category. *Sob* There's probably other options, but to me, since it's a madlib, the obvious answer is to put it in the Comedy genre since madlibs are supposed to be funny. *Bigsmile*

It's been a couple of days since I did this, so I didn't remember a lot of it. Them taking "Jerry's junky old horse" literally made me laugh out loud! *Rolling* I'm also amused that Jerry felt uncomfortable that Jules wrote his name on an elm. Are her feelings not reciprocated or is he a tree-hugger and doesn't approve of writing on them? No telling, but I like it! *Laugh*

Wow! It's looking really great! It's virtually impossible to get all of the boxes so every option could fit perfectly, but you've done as near a job as I can figure. Them deciding to go to "the home" sounds like they are going to a nursing home. *Laugh* Oh, well. It still provides humor. Thank you for all your hard work! If you're planning to include an example, I can purposely create one with the answers I found most amusing like being packed like a measuring cup and them riding Jerry's junky old horse. *Laugh*

Yeah, I know it's not important and I keep picking apart the back end of the madlib, but hey, this is the level of (low quality) reviewing you get from me. *Laugh* Anyway, for the most part, the back end is now looking great! The only thing I'd suggest is that you have foods as Food1, Food2, Food3, but you have places (or was it things? now I forgot, but I think it's places) as Place1, Place, and Place2. I'd switch that to Place1, Place2, and Place3. *Bigsmile*

How have I NOT noticed all this time that you only have 2 genres?!? *FacePalm* I'm so sorry about my quality of reviewing. *Blush* That's something I normally always comment on. *Headbang* I assume you're aware that it's important to use all 3 because people search most often using Genre. Also, Mods search for a specific genre to use in their Newsletters. And finally, if this were to get nominated for "The Quills, it gets automatically entered into the genre categories listed, but it's not nominated for any category that's not listed, no matter HOW obviously it fits in that category. *Sob* There's probably other options, but to me, since it's a madlib, the obvious answer is to put it in the Comedy genre since madlibs are supposed to be funny. *Bigsmile*

It's been a couple of days since I did this, so I didn't remember a lot of it. Them taking "Jerry's junky old horse" literally made me laugh out loud! *Rolling* I'm also amused that Jerry felt uncomfortable that Jules wrote his name on an elm. Are her feelings not reciprocated or is he a tree-hugger and doesn't approve of writing on them? No telling, but I like it! *Laugh*

Wow! It's looking really great! It's virtually impossible to get all of the boxes so every option could fit perfectly, but you've done as near a job as I can figure. Them deciding to go to "the home" sounds like they are going to a nursing home. *Laugh* Oh, well. It still provides humor. Thank you for all your hard work! You've done a fabulous job here! I've given you 5 stars with the assumption you'll find another genre to include. The back end part is just me seeking perfection. *Wink* You did a wonderful job and worked very hard on this! I suspect my constant reviewing gave you another point to add to your Newsletter--while these are fun, perfecting them can be a PITA. *Rolling* But you've pretty much done it, I think. Wonderful work! And you can breathe easily knowing this is my last review for this item. *Rolling*
21
21
Review of Plot Survey  
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I didn't know enough about this, so I called my financial planner to ask questions. *Laugh*

He said you have to make some assumptions and you can make up some information because depending on where they work, different institutions have different rules.

You have to assume they work at a company that is both a brokerage firm and a bank. (I didn't think to ask if there were other options.)

There is, by law a 2-day settlement period for all stocks, so the plan you have with only 2 days to do everything, isn't likely to work well, unless that's how he gets caught, but if he works there, he should know the rules, I would expect. (Yes, I'm assuming it's a guy. *Bigsmile*) But he said there are banks that have up to 7-day holds on money, so it's fine to make the hold time of the checks longer. It's just the rules for that bank. *Wink*

He must have a access to the bank's house account (which all banks have) for all deposits and credits. (Not sure of the difference between a deposit and a credit, exactly, but I can ask tomorrow if you need me to. The credit might be the amount the bank gives you immediately while the deposit is the total amount you will get when the check clears, but I'm not 100% sure on that.)

He said this would work best for large checks where part is withheld and part is made available to the depositor. So, someone deposits a $1000 check, they get $400 immediately, but $600 is held for X amount of time, dependent on the bank. Also, he said there's not a set amount that is withheld or a set amount that triggers a withholding of money.

That above part is important because that's how he's doing this--with the bank's money. Otherwise, the depositors or whatever the name is for the people who are the ones who wrote the check, some would notice the weirdness in their bank account. This "float" money isn't magically in some account that no one sees. If he withdraws money, it's being withdrawn from the person's bank account. Thus, he needs part of the money to be held by the bank in the bank's house account so that the individuals who own the accounts won't notice anything happening in their own account.

The reason for large checks to be held for a certain number of days is to ensure that the check is real and funds are really available to be withdrawn. It typically takes 1 day to do all of this and the check is (theoretically) settled on the next day (but remember that some banks have longer hold times), but the day the check is deposited is Day 0. Day 1 the check is validated and by Day 2, the funds are available.

He recommends: Day 0 = large deposit and money withheld. Day 1 = early in the day, check is validated and he makes stock purchase. The rest of this is my own thoughts based on his comments because I don't want to bother him again on a Sunday. lol Maybe he dumps the stock the same day or if he's not happy with how much it's gone up, maybe he does more on Day 2, then sells by the end of Day 2, if he didn't sell on Day 1. The money is back in the bank's house account, depending on if there is a hold on the money after a large sale--not sure if that's a thing. Sorry, I didn't think to ask that, either. Then Day 3 and Day 4, the stocks are settled. Day 5, everything is back to normal. So, maybe a 5 day hold?

However, if this happens too often, the FCC will likely notice, though he didn't mention this, either. He was busy so it was a quick conversation. Sorry.

I hope some of this helps! Fun idea, but too complicated for my poor brain. *Laugh*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
22
22
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I'm loving this! It just gets better and better! *InLove2* Great work!

I think this time I only have a few things to suggest a change for and none are really imperative, so fantastic work!

1. When we are choosing words, you have Feeling1, but there's no Feeling2. I'd erase the 1.

2. In that same area, you have Place2, but the other one is just called Place. But you have Thing1 and Food1, so I'd change that first one to Place1 to go with Place2.

3. Are you sure it should be that the kid "gave them stink eye"? I think thought it was "gave them the stink eye." I don't use the term much, but I was sure that was how it was used. I'm too lazy to look it up, though. *Blush* Yeah, I know. That's been there since the very first review. *FacePalm* I notice different things different times. *Angelic* Plus, it's getting so close to perfect, it's easier to see the smaller problems. *Bigsmile*

4. When we pick a verb, it should probably be required to be past tense since the rest of the story is in past tense. *Wink* Mine suddenly changes to present tense for 1 sentence, then back to past. *FacePalm*

5. In the last sentence, I'd change that to "but (Mickey) wished he hadn't eaten..." because "and" indicates that it's a similar thing, however, "but" indicates a different one. His experience was different from Jules. She wouldn't change a thing, but he'd change what he ate. *Wink*

6. Since the foods are plural, the ending should probably be "because they make him" instead of "because it makes him."

7. That last verb, I just realized it does need to be present tense, but it's the same as the previous verb, which needs (IMO) to be past. So, maybe have Verb1-Past-Tense and Same-Verb1-Present-Tense?

It's looking great! And as I get more familiar with it, it's more fun to do because I can plan for better answers. *Bigsmile* I like something being packed like a measuring cup. I think that's a great description! *Delight* And I found my water store to be funny. *Laugh* Taking coconuts on a picnic seemed funny to me as well. *Bigsmile* I also love the change that you made with Jules writing his name on the tree instead of writing him a letter. Good choice and it was a nice surprise to see. *Delight*

Well done! You're really rocking this madlib thing! Though maybe part of your Newsletter might include how hard it can be to find all the various ways the user can mess it up unintentionally and you have to try to dummy-proof it as much as you can. *Rolling* But good luck with that. The Army has been trying to dummy-proof things since the beginning, yet Soldiers always manage to find a way to show the Army that it's impossible to dummy-proof EVERYTHING. *Rolling*

You've got a great piece here! Thanks for sharing and thank you for the MB! *Party* Good luck with this and your Newsletter! *4leaf*
23
23
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
I back to pick apart your contest again. *Laugh* Remember that these are only my own opinions. Do with them as you see fit.

I love that you've added the word "contest" to the title. I think that was an important change! I've seen things that I didn't click on (back when I was entering contests regularly) because it didn't say "contest" so I didn't know. I thought it was some educational/how-to thing or a challenge or something else, but not a contest. Great change!

Your prizes are still enticing, but reasonable for a twice-a-month contest...and the description matches what the "prizes" section says. Good work.

In your description of malapropism, you have a comma outside the quotation marks in "for all intensive purposes." That's a great example, BTW. I hear that regularly. *FacePalm* Anyway, somewhere I got the idea that you might be British. I used to be somewhat familiar with the British rules on commas, but have now forgotten them. *Think* But in American English, the comma ALWAYS goes inside the quotation marks. I meant to mention this in the last review, but got distracted by who-knows-what. *Think* Anyway, so if you use British English, then maybe the comma is correct...or maybe not. But if you use American English, it's wrong. *Wink*

In the "Current Round" section, I noticed the parentheses before, but just wondered briefly about them and moved on. Now I'm really wondering about them. Why are there parentheses? Why not just say when the submissions are accepted and when they will be judged? I don't see any point in the parentheses. *Confused* Sorry. I know. I'm bringing up brand new things that could have been fixed before. *FacePalm* Well, think of it as this is getting better and better, so I'm no longer being distracted by big errors. *Bigsmile* So, speaking of being nitpicky, there should probably be a colon after "Judging" since you have one after "Current Round" and "Submissions accepted." *Smile*

I just noticed you have the contest ending at 11:59 am. Oh, noon! I didn't expect that! I think only your contest and "The Writer's Cramp end at noon. You'll likely have some folks who misread that and assume it's 11:59 pm because it's so uncommon. In fact, I misread it at first. I'm currently down in the part about the word count being done by MS Word and realized I should double check the time the entries are due. Yep, I misread that. *FacePalm* Maybe put the "a.m." in italics? Though I'm still sure someone will misread it. But you can't fully dummy-proof anything. Believe me, the Army has tried, yet Soldiers continue to show the Army that such a thing is actually impossible. *Rolling*

In the last paragraph of black before the words turn blue, you say "Write a flash fiction about the most..." This is okay, but I feel like "Write a flash fiction story about the most..." sounds better to me. *Think*

Personally, I would mention that the book entry link is found in the upper right corner of the entry. Too often I see people posting a link to the whole book because they use the book link, not the entry link. But since you told them to use the code for "entry," they now might end up with "Invalid (whatever--I forget what it says)" because they are using the "entry" code, but they are using the book item's link, not the entry's link. Remember, newbies might be entering. And also, I SURPRISING number of non-newbies don't know basic stuff. I have lost count of the people I've taught how to just do a basic item or bitem link even though they've been here 5+ years. Seriously?? I think the oldest was like someone who had been here 16-17 years and didn't know how to link anything. *FacePalm* I'm telling you, your current knowledge is WAY ahead of probably 90% of WdC. *Headbang*

Since you've been using periods, consider one after the max rating sentence and I'd add one after the next sentence about being disqualified for linking wrong. Though I hope you'll let people know if you notice it before judging. Mistakes happen and some people are just not good at it. Did I mention that for "The Contest Challenge, I ask people to post a link to the contest forum post where they actually entered the contest to prove they entered? They use {post:#######}. I have an example literally just above the forum. I had a woman who somehow managed to complete 12 consecutive entries, as required by the rules and though I corrected her EVERY SINGLE MONTH and directed her to the examples, in case she needed help, and EVERY SINGLE ENTRY WAS WRONG! Month after month after month...wrong, wrong, wrong. *Shock2* HOW?!? I have NO idea. *Headbang* Luckily for her, I say the challenge is supposed to be entering 12 contests, not posting the proof. *Laugh* Every month, I reexplained it and redirected her to examples, but it made no difference. *FacePalm* What's my point? Aside from saying that there are some, uh, less smart people on here, I'm also saying, "GOOD LUCK!" *Laugh* Though if you are only asking for bitem and entry links, maybe it will be okay. *Bigsmile*

Great job putting in bold that the entries are to be "under 500 words." That helps make sure it's clear that 500 is not acceptable, though it's a common max in other contests. Well done with that clarification!

The prizes seem much more sustainable now! Great work! Though you can bump them up later if you decide to move to a quarterly contest. For that matter, if you decide to run it monthly, you can literally double the prizes and still not spend any more. lol If you later decide to increase the prizes, I'd recommend increasing the GPs instead of the awardicon since no matter the size of the awardicon, it will only count for 1 CR. But a lot of people on here have to earn GPs to pay for their membership, so they'll appreciate more GPs. *Wink* That's my opinion, but if you're unsure, feel free to set up a poll and ask. There's literally a poll thing on here that you can do. *Bigsmile*

Your contest is nearly perfect, IMO. But if you don't make the suggested changes, at this point, I won't be bothered. It's come a long way and is looking great. These changes are pretty nitpicky, I know. *Wink* But that's because you have nothing huge to complain about. Great work on this! *Delight* I do hope you get several entries. If not, don't give up. And remember, if this contest doesn't hit it big, you've learned a lot through the process. Maybe your next idea with be "the one."

Though, also remember that even big-name contests on here don't get tons of entries most of the time. I think "The Whatever Contest -- Closed for Now is one of the few contests that got a lot of entries pretty regularly, but that's because I paid for entries. *Angelic* *Bigsmile* Like I said, people use GPs to pay for memberships. *Wink* I have deep pockets...Well, probably not as deep as I like to pretend, but that's a different issue. *Laugh* Anyway, I pay 5k-50k per entry, depending on how much work it requires. If I was running something like this, I'd probably pay 5k for each entry, then have the prizes on top of it. Though I usually pay the same as first prize, so I would probably pay the winner 5k (and an awardicon) instead of 10k. The winner would end up in the same boat since they'd get 5k for entering and 5k for winning whereas you're giving them 10k for winning. But the losers in my contest are happier. *Laugh* I'm not saying to pay for entries, though if you don't get many, it's something to consider, especially if you run this less often.

But just remember that if a contest like "The Writer's Cramp has rounds with no entries and other contests, even when I highlight them on "The Contest Challenge, will sometimes only get a couple of entries, yours isn't likely to get 10 and especially not after you've run it several times back to back. *Think* So, don't get disappointed. Rethink the plan (like paying for entries and/or running it less often or even moving on to another idea) and be happy with how much you've learned through this. You've done a FABULOUS job! Keep it up! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* It's looking great! Good luck! *4leaf*
24
24
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hey! I finally made it back to rereview this. *Bigsmile* I know. It took me long enough. *FacePalm*

Again, these are just my opinions. Do with them as you wish. *Whistle* *Laugh*

I'm curious as to why you "(2023)" as part of your contest title. *Confused* I'd consider deleting that and trying to squeeze the word "Contest" in there so it's obvious that it's a contest. *Wink* If you need more space, you can delete the "&" and the spaces before and after it and put a forward slash between "malaprops" and "mondegreens." Maybe that will work? I really think you need the word contest in there somehow. Speaking of which, did you list it under Community (on the left side), Contests? If not, definitely do that! *Delight*

Nice work on the genres and rating, though it knocks out my story. *Laugh* My friend has narcolepsy, the illness where you suddenly fall asleep. His roommate, of course, knew and he'd told his girlfriend. The roommate overheard his girlfriend telling one of her friends, "My boyfriend's roommate has necrophilia." (That's the desire to have sex with dead people, in case you didn't know. *Yikes*) You could hear the roommate yell from the other room, "NARCOLEPSY! HE HAS NARCOLEPSY!" *Rolling* *Rolling* *Rolling*

Anyway, so that's my story that I can't post because it's not 13+, but I wanted to share. *Bigsmile*

Your description says we can win 30k GPs and an awardicon, but the prizes say a 25k awardicon and 10k GPs. *Think* *Laugh* Aside from fixing the differences, consider a 10k awardicon and 10k GPs. I say this because most contests don't even give an awardicon, so no one is not going to enter this contest because the awardicon is "only" a 10k awardicon. *Wink* They both count for CRs, so I think people will be happy with that. Right now, you have the 1st place person getting 35k in prizes. That's not a small amount, especially if you run this twice a month. *Yikes* That's 70k GPs per month...with no honorable mentions. *Scared* Add 1 honorable mention per round and 2 rounds per month, that's 100,000 GPs per month in prizes! *Shock2* Maybe the honorable mention should just get GPs--5k or 10k if you feel a need to be really generous. *Wink* Just my thought... Whatever you do, update the description. *Bigsmile*

Great job with the definitions and examples. They are very clear and that mondegreen example... *Yikes* *Laugh* Yeah, that's definitely memorable! *Laugh*

Good job putting that the deadline is in 2023. I hate when I find a contest and I'm not sure if the upcoming deadline is for this year or not. *FacePalm* Of course, now I know to look in the top part of the item, where it says Modified. If it was last modified a year or more ago, definitely not an active contest. *Wink*

However, for your times, I'd encourage you to put 11:59 pm. 12:00 is confusing and leaves people wondering if you mean lunchtime or midnight. And even if you put am, some people still get confused. Also, you say your deadline is 12:00 (I'm assuming midnight) on the 14th. So, that means that since the 14th starts at midnight after the 13th, the deadline in a normal WdC contest would be listed as July 13th at 11:59 pm. Is that what you meant? I suspect you meant July 14th at 11:59 pm. If so, see how it's confusing and why we use 11:59 pm instead? *Laugh* Wait...Judging starts the 14th, so maybe you really DID mean 11:59 pm on the 13th. Or are you talking about noon, so July 14th at 11:59 am? Just before lunch? Okay, now I'm not even sure when the deadline is. *FacePalm* Or did you REALLY mean midnight at the start of the 14th? In which case you should put it as July 13th at 11:59 pm. Confusing. *RollEyes* *Laugh*

I encourage you to give instructions about linking a book entry as well, since you're explaining how to link a bitem. *Bigsmile* You use {entry:#######} where the entry number is found in the upper right corner of the book entry.

You say the item will be disqualified if the bitem isn't properly linked. But I'd say "b-item or entry"--well, I wouldn't include that rule, personally, but that's because of the AMAZING number of people I've met who don't know how to link items on here. *FacePalm* I literally just had to teach a yellow case how to link a bitem a little while ago. *FacePalm* If you choose to keep that rule, I do hope you at least check the forum regularly for errors (sometimes a person just puts a square bracket by accident because their fingers aren't in sync with each other) and tag them to get them to correct it as much as you can. Do you know how to tag folks? If not, let me know and I'll be happy to show you. *Smile*

A couple of sentences don't end in a period, but it's not a huge deal. *Wink*

Good job making it double clear that you don't want 500 words! Since most folks have a max of 500 or 1000 or 1500 or whatever, it would be natural for folks to think the max is 500, even though you did say 499. It's just what they're used to. But between saying it twice and putting it in bold, they have no excuse. *Laugh* Good job! *Bigsmile*

I also like that you say what you will be using for the word count so there's no confusion about that. Great addition!

You say to donate "over 25,000," so does that mean if a person donates 25k, they won't get anything? I recommend not saying "over 25k" but maybe "at least 25k" so they know that 25k will get them something. If it won't, tell them "at least 30k." 30k is still a pretty common price for a community MB. *Smile*

There's still a little work to be done--especially with ensuring you can keep up with those prizes (and that they are posted correctly everywhere *Laugh*) and clarifying that deadline. But it's looking really good! I'm super pleased with what you are doing! I hope you advertise it well and get some really good submissions. In case you haven't noticed others doing it on the Newsfeed (which means you probably are only on your Personal Newsfeed, not the Community Newsfeed), people often post the winners on the Newsfeed and sometimes even link the winning entries there as well. I think the winners like that, so consider doing that. *Smile*

Also, consider getting on the Community Newsfeed, if you aren't already. Clicking Newsfeed on the left only takes you to your Personal Newsfeed. Here you only see official WdC stuff and things posted by people whose plus sign you've already clicked at least once to set them as a favorite. Though I encourage you to double click until you see the megaphone as this makes you a fan of theirs and they are notified and some folks, like me, reward their fans. *Bigsmile* Thus, I always say double clicking to the megaphone is better since there's no real difference except whether you're secretly stalking them or actually supporting them. *Rolling*

Okay, that was a bit of a joke, but anyway, to get to the Community Newsfeed, go to your Personal Newsfeed (the default when you click Newsfeed) and along the top of your Personal Newsfeed, you'll see "View the Community Newsfeed." Click that. Now you'll see what EVERYONE is posting (within your rating limit). Scroll, Like, comment, and start making friends. If you hang out there a lot, more and more people will start looking forward to seeing you Like or comment on their items and eventually they will (hopefully) double click your plus. Then your adds will appear on their Personal Newsfeed. *Bigsmile* And, of course, when you meet folks you like, double click their plus as well. *Wink*

Good luck with your contest! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* It's such a fun idea! I do hope you get a lot of entries, but if not, keep building a fan base and try it again later. *Bigsmile*
25
25
In affiliation with The Witch's House  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hey!

I'm back and I see you've made some changes to your fun madlib. *Delight* Nice!

As I said before, madlibs are fun and this is no exception. *Party* I definitely enjoyed it. Some parts, well, that's just how madlibs are--you aren't going to be able to get them so that every word sounds right. But I do think there have been improvements.

May I suggest some others? *Angelic* Remember that this is your masterpiece and these are only my own opinions, to be taken with a block of salt. *Wink*

Consider reviewing the initial thing where we type in the words. If this is going to go in a Newsletter, you might strive for perfection. If not, it's good enough. *Laugh* But there's discrepancies like you have Food1, Food2, and Food3. But you have Thing and Thing2 and you have Feeling2, but no Feeling1 or Feeling. I know the feeling one is just left over from previous changes. *Wink* None of these are ruining the experience. The inconsistencies are just something I noticed and wanted to mention, in case you planned to put this in the Newsletter. *Bigsmile*

As for the madlib, itself, some changes are definitely improvements, IMO. Well done! Others, did I miss a problem before or do we have a new problem? *Blush* *FacePalm* I don't know. I'll explain and let you decide what the situation is and if you want to fix it. *Smile*

Some of the things I changed were just to test them out. "50 degrees" works okay as a temp, but not as much as if I'd said hot or cold. Meh. Whatever.

While I wouldn't run to the Mai Tai store like I would my previous hot chocolate store, I'd definitely stop in out of curiosity. *Delight* This is a fun idea for a store. Very creative!

"They took (Greg) junky old (moped)..." Didn't it show possession last time? Or was the sentence different? I don't remember this not showing possession. Did it have an 's outside of the box I put the name in? If not, maybe include one. *Laugh*

"...a picnic basket full of (sandwich) and (chips) and (corn on the cob)." I wanted to see if you'd changed it so that singular foods work. Uh, not really. lol I know I suggested this before, but I still think it might be best to request plural foods instead of just food, but that's my opinion. It's your madlib. *Smile*

Shouldn't that be "(Greg) burst through the crowd..."? *Think* Though it's more colloquial, you can probably say "busted," if you want. *Laugh*

I love that Jules goes to a tree to write him a card or letter or whatever. But consider adding "tree" or is it just me that thinks it sounds better if you say "She went to the nearest (maple) tree and wrote..." Or "She went to the nearest (ash) tree and wrote..." Or "She went to the nearest (oak) tree and wrote..." Try reading those sentences with and without the word "tree." It could just be how I speak, but I think it's better with it, especially since there's no other reference to trees. Now, if this was about a forest, that would be different. *Bigsmile*

I think the last paragraph may need the most work, not that it's hard. *Smile* "At the end of the day, Jules and (Greg) went (park)." I'd add "to the" or "to a," depending on what you think works best for the most variety of places chosen. *Smile*

"Jules confessed she wouldn't change a thing and (Greg) wished he hadn't eaten (chips) because it makes him (jump)." There are a couple of things here, that you may have already noticed as you read what my madlib says. Since Jules and Greg have someone different experiences, I'd say, "Jules confessed she wouldn't change a thing, BUT (Greg)..." Naturally, that's not supposed to be capitalized. I just did that to ensure you noticed the change. lol

The other thing is that above, we see the singular foods don't work. Here, there's a combination of singular and plural needed to make this work. lol If we use "sandwich" as a singular food, it doesn't work in the 1st part, "...(Greg) wished he hadn't eaten (sandwich)..." But it partly does with the 2nd part because you have a singular food and you use "it." But it doesn't go well with the whole thing. I still think you should request all plural foods and then change this to "they make" so using the plural of "sandwich" in this example you would have "...(Greg) wished he hadn't eaten (sandwiches) because they make him (jump)." My chosen word of "chips" would also work in this sentence--"(Greg) wished he hadn't eaten (chips) because they make him (jump)."

So, yeah, still several suggested corrections, but it's still a fun madlib. Thank you for the MB, BTW! *Hug1**Smile**Hug2* I look forward to seeing what you do with these in the Newsletter! *Delight* Good luck! Exciting!!!
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