ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
There were some punctuation and capitalization errors in this that I couldn't ignore. Go through it and maybe edit it a bit more and it would be just fine.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
Sometimes, an inconsistent rhyme scheme doesn't bother me, but this did just a little. It was choppy in places that made it difficult to follow at times, but it was still good!
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Work on editing this a little bit and it would be great. :)
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
There were some capitalization issues (I think). Other than those, great job!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was upbeat and made me smile. It brought a lot of pleasant images to mind because of the colors and the mention of sailors. It flowed nicely and was good without being flowery.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
There needed to be some capitalization in places where you left it out, but nothing a quick read-through wouldn't fix!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I love that this didn't have a traditional rhyme scheme. It was poetic and rhymed just fine despite having no fixed rhyme scheme, which only added to the piece over all.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
Just a few spacing issues that could be easily fixed. :)
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I love how realistic this is. I was immediately drawn to the characters you created and was drawn into this poem despite the brevity. It was really beautiful.
FIRST IMPRESSION
I love stories about the elderly, even if they are creepy!
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
There were places where the spacing was incorrect or there was a line break that shouldn't have been there, but other than that, great job.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
The character Ethel was oddly likeable despite the things she had done. I guess that is because she was so well written! She was jealous, cunning, and cold, making her out to be a perfect villain. I am a sucker for villains.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
Blurry should probably be capitalized.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I really like the idea behind this. It was original and presented a dilemma for the narrator that I thought gave the poem depth. That would be a hard choice to make!
FIRST IMPRESSION
Oh. My. God. I could have written this because I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I didn't really notice any errors, but I was probably distracted because I could REALLY relate to it. I'm not even kidding.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I loved this, and as I have said repeated times already, I could totally relate to it. That feeling of not being good enough, that everything you do is worthless, and that nothing you do will EVER be good enough. Good GODS, I feel you on this.
I suffer from a serious lack of self-worth. I'm sorry it is
something you experience yourself.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
I'm sorry that you feel this too, as I know how it goes, but just know that you have written something really great here that a LOT of people, not just me, can relate to. You aren't alone, sweetheart.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I didn't really see anything that stuck out to me, so good job!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I've definitely been where you are. Things can change in the blink of an eye, from good to bad, and there is nothing you can do but go along for the ride as it gets bumpier and bumpier. Believe me, I totally understand.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
This was intimate and precious. I like all of the emotion in it. I'm BIG on emotions.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I found no errors in this. It was perfect.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I could see everything you described in perfect detail. All of it. The mood was also PERFECT and consistent throughout the duration of the poem. It was really cool. The last stanza really impressed me too.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
I hope to see more from you! Keep writing!
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
One by one the steely pop, reverberated
I think this would look better as One by one, the steely pop reverberated.
Other than that, perfect!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I was like oh my god! Laughing and singing? Over a murder!? Then the punchline rolled out and I seriously laughed out loud. This was great. I even read it aloud to my girlfriend because I did not expect that ending at ALL. PERFECTION.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
I hope you write more. This was really great despite the brevity!
FIRST IMPRESSION
This was so emotional and intricate. I could tell that you put a LOT of effort into it.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I found nothing wrong with this.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was rife with emotion and well thought-out. It really touched me. It makes me wonder if this was a personal experience for you or if it was written from a character's POV. Either way, it is powerful, moving, and precious.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Let writing be your outlet. You're very good at it.
FIRST IMPRESSION
That is one big block of text!
Very descriptive also.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I would break this up into paragraphs. Big time. Like, everything was spelled well, but it needs to be edited.
Also, it was descriptive, but sometimes at the expense of quality. There were so many descriptive words for every little thing that it had a 'cluttered' feel to it that detracted from the over all read for me.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was well written save for the few (minor) things I mentioned above. The biggest hurdle to jump would be separating this into proper paragraphs instead of one big block of text.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Despite the errors I've mentioned, I still really liked this. I am giving it a 4 out of five, and would have easily given it a five if you had edited it a few times and broken it up into real paragraphs. You're good with description, but try not to over do it. :)
As short as this was, it was still really good. I thoroughly enjoyed it despite the brevity. It came across as deep without being too wordy or relying heavily on an "abused" vocabulary. What I mean is...it came across as intelligent without being super flowery.. Really great job!
FIRST IMPRESSION
Veeeeery angry, but I should have expected that from your handle.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
All that I see wrong with this is lack of capitalization.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was angry, but it really got the point across. There was a lot of bitter resentment and emotion coming from this. Too many people are afraid to say what is really on their mind, and you pulled it off flawlessly. Good job!
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Keep writing! You seem to be well aware that it is a great outlet.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I found absolutely NO errors in this at all!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
Aww, poor Dodger! I IMMEDIATELY felt attached to him because of his sense of right and wrong. He was such a good dog and was scolded despite his loyalty. It made me sad, but made for an excellent story.
The last two lines were especially good.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I found absolutely NO errors in this at all!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was brilliant. It was full of gorgeous imagery that really painted a scene in my mind, as well as made me feel like I was there! It was really wonderful.
I instantly liked Madeline too. She was both creepy and pleasant in stark contrast, and I LOVE characters like that. This is a really excellent read and your vocabulary and ability to create a scene really impressed me!
CLOSING THOUGHTS
This was brilliant. I can't say it enough.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I saw no errors in this!
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I loved the imagery in this. It was beautiful and it was fantasy with a darker twist. It left me wanting more, and almost read like prose. I thought everything about this was just perfect.
FIRST IMPRESSION
I am very sorry, but I didn't like this at all. :(
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
Now you can work with your heart and your sole. (Sole should be soul)
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I am probably a little biased, but this poem actually offended me a little. I am pending disability for three mental illnesses, and a lot of people think that people with mental disorders are not disabled and that they are just lazy. It is a recurrent theme and a social stigma, and even though this wasn't directed specifically at people with disabilities, it could be taken that way, and because of that, I didn't like it all that much.
It was well written and had good flow, but the subject matter rubbed me the wrong way.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Well written despite my dislike of subject matter. ^^;;
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
Punctuation at the end of lines would make this better, but other than that, everything looked fine. :)
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
There were a couple of lines I didn't like, but overall, I enjoyed the poem. When I think of green eyes, I think of my grandparents, and even though this seems more like a love poem, it made me think of them. :)
FIRST IMPRESSION
This was sad and made me wonder what inspired it.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I saw no errors here.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I like this, but the number of lines per stanza kept changing, and it was spaced in a way that made it seem like it should rhyme. It was still really beautiful though as is. Free verse is often underrated and passed off, but you seem to have good control over it. It had excellent emotion, and I could feel what the main character was feeling.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
This is really good and I liked it a lot. :)
FIRST IMPRESSION
This needs serious formatting! It is one big block of text that should be many paragraphs!
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
This is a big block of text that should be many paragraphs. It needs more punctuation in places and capitalization in others.
You use the word 'we' a lot at the beginning of sentences, which makes this seem repetitive and makes it hard to read at times.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I will be honest. This needs a lot of work. The idea behind it is good, but there are times where the main character was supposed to come across as cool and cruel, but he came off as cheesy and silly.
There were a lot of good ideas here, but I feel like you held back and didn't really follow through. It comes across as choppy and disorganized even though it is a really good idea.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Put a little more effort into this and you could have something really great. At least break it up into paragraphs to make it easier to read. There is great potential here, you just need to tap into it. :)
FIRST IMPRESSION
I liked the rhyming story aspect of it. Wasn't quite a poem and wasn't quite a story, but a good combination. This is a rarity, but the good kind. :D
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
I didn't see anything that stood out terribly much. There were a few little mistakes here and there, but nothing so big that it distracted from the over all read.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I really liked everything about this. I like that it didn't seem like a story or a poem, but was both. It made it interesting, plus the story it told was excellent. It read like a gothic fable or something. Look before you leap. ;)
CLOSING THOUGHTS
This was excellent. I would change anything except giving it a quick run through once more for minor errors. :)
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
The only thing I can say about this is one of the stanzas:
"Friends and family come and go,
Having purpose, direction and goals.
And I wonder, will I ever live again,
Without feeling lonely and cold?"
It doesn't have the same rhyme scheme as the rest and as a result, stands out like a sore thumb. ^^;;
Other than that, I can't find any problems.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I liked everything about this except for the fifth stanza because it doesn't rhyme the way everything else does. It detracts from the poem over all for me, but I still thought it was a great read so I will give it a 4. :)
CLOSING THOUGHTS
I've pretty much said everything. xD
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
There weren't any glaring mistakes in this piece.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
I liked this, but I think it could have been a lot better. It read like 'he did this, then she did this, then this happened' and a lot of your sentences started with the same words. It made it feel repetitive at times and it detracted from the story for me.
I still like the story, however. The characters were all believable and seemed truly real. My only nitpick is that there should have been slightly more to their emotions. It felt a bit dry at times where it should have made me feel what they were feeling.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
Could have been a little better, but definitely has real potential! It makes me want to know more, which is always a good sign. :)
FIRST IMPRESSION
I can't decide if the punctuation and capitalization on this is correct or not.
ERRORS Keep in mind that I only point things out that I see wrong or sound off to me. Most of this is only opinion and you can completely disregard it if you like!
See above.
OVERALL OPINION Keep in mind that I am one person! My opinion is just one! You may have many people with an opinion opposite of mine. :)
This was really original! Even though it was gross at times, it still kept me engaged and I wanted to know more. Plus, Kraken and Isabel as well as their siblings were cute and believable. I love how the families responded to these 'facts'.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
This is really cute and original. I thoroughly enjoyed it. :)
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