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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/hollymerry
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922 Public Reviews Given
Review Style
Honest and encouraging
I'm good at...
Proofreading for grammar, letting you know which areas of your writing work and which might be improved
Favorite Genres
Fantasy, historical, adventure, sci-fi
Least Favorite Genres
Murder, horror, erotica
Favorite Item Types
I’m happy to review all types of item
I will not review...
Anything with graphic violence, sexual content or profanity
Public Reviews
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Review of Tree Fairies  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a well-written and fun story. I loved the way you describe the fairies making homes in the woodland, holding feasts with food gathered from the woodland. The story was easy to picture and focusing on one family with children makes this tale appeal to little ones. It was nice the fairy king wanted to help the family and that there was a happy ending. The dog pee was a surprise twist at the end and sure to make kids laugh.

I think there may be something missing from this sentence as it reads awkwardly: ‘All but our small family brought food, who survived because they had great food to eat during these meals’
I also wondered if you might make some of the early plot points in the story into a dialogue between the fairies so the story feels more real and draws readers in?


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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Review of The Path  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a beautiful piece. The beauty of the imagery and short, regular length of the paragraphs gives this piece the effect of poetry. I too wish I lived in Lothlorien! The images in this piece are breathtaking in their loveliness, yet also relaxing. I could easily picture the autumn leaves, stars and waterfall. It was nice to linger in the wood in this piece rather than passing through it and on to other adventures.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
This is a beautifully written poem, taking the traditional romantic subject of love and roses. I enjoyed the image of roses of a deep, velvet hue as it perfectly conveys the look and texture of the petals. The ending of tarnished jewels lost from the split crown is an unusual one and fits the theme of the poem about making the most of youth and love.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I found the deliberate lack of punctuation here aided the effect of creating a repetitive short, sharp shock that mirrors the sound of bullets. It also suggests that despite such atrocities, humanity keeps repeating these awful deeds. The end of the poem where readers are encouraged to think and pray becomes even more powerful with this thought in mind. I felt the choice of ‘mini-monoverse’ poetic structure fitted the subject matter now as the poem created the sound of gunshot when read out loud. It was nice you mentioned the poetic form and an explanation of this at the end.
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Review of Sweet Peggy Lee  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was a well-written poem describing having a conversation with Peggy Lee about the Hollywood film she’s in and its romantic story. The poem is full of interest and I could easily picture Peggy Lee and how she feels. I love the fact that at the end it is revealed that this poem is a dream - surely many people can relate to dreaming of meeting a favourite actress in Hollywood?
The poetic form was consistent and I enjoyed the rhyming endings.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a sinister poem perfect for the Halloween season. Was the picture that goes with it a prompt or something you found to inspire you? It fits the tone and action of the poem perfectly. I loved the idea of the witch’s evil shadow looming. ‘Even the moon bears her mark’ shows how powerful she is.
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Review of Corona  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
A powerful and poignant poem. I like how you used the image of an evil king controlling the chess board as a metaphor for Covid here. The poem weaves in many of the changes, privations, fears and uncertainties of life in Covid times. At moments there was amusement, at other times a sinister sense of dread. It conveys the mood of the pandemic well I feel.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an interesting article about the origin of a restaurant chain and how it goes by different names in different countries. I hadn’t heard of Hardee’s before, and I enjoyed the discussion of the founding of the restaurant and early prices. I also never knew rattlesnakes could be eaten!
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Review of Cat Journal  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is evocatively described. I like how it conveys the sense of how cats are always part of our lives, watching us in the unlikeliest of places - here the bathroom! The choice of words make this poem unusual and something to appreciate as it conjures vivid pictures. I liked the way the misted mirror echos the pale winter sky.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
This is an inspirational piece. I love how you drew on the strength both your female relatives snd famous women taught you. The reasons you admire them and what they taught you were well described. There is a good mix here - women in history, writers, important royal and political figures, singers and actresses.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Your Great Grandma Edna sounds quite a character and I’d love to meet her. Her character being a sweet lady who loves animals but who sticks up for herself sounds great. The scrapbooks sound do pretty - I love Edwardian scrapbooks, also the screens ladies decorated with picture scraps in those days. What a life Edna had - gypsies, rescuing a cow, horse riding, nursing and having a friend on the Titanic. Thank you for sharing her story. I hope you live to be at least 90 like her too!
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Review of The World's Gone!  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem does a lovely job at capturing a child’s wonderment at the natural world. Jessica’s lively imagination is delightful and amusing. The way you write perfectly captures the voice of a child and her curiosity about the weather outside. I enjoyed reading how she thought her school had vanished as she couldn’t see far in the fog. The idea of the sun being broken and wanting to play with the moon are striking - Jessica sounds an imaginative girl with all her questions.
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Review of Man Born Blind  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
A spiritually though-provoking essay in the subject of blindness. Various Biblical examples of blindness are related to modern day life in ways that get readers to meditate on how God works and how they might become closer to Him. My favourite is the part where the disciples ask why God made a man blind and assume it was to punish him or is parents. Jesus replied that God was not using the blindness as punishment but to teach us. I think all experiences come about because God is trying to teach us and we must just look and we will see why he guides us along certain paths and why certain circumstances occur.
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Review of Blessings  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
What a lovely image this poem conjures up. Birds are often associated with new life and peace. The image of newborn birds flying and spreading hope is a joyous one. It reminds me of the joy of seeing young birds in spring. I like how you use repetition in the lines here, giving this piece the effect of a song.
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Review of Puddle Song  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
What lovely wellies! I love the cute design and he looks so happy splashing in that puddle. You capture the joy of a child at the simple pleasure of jumping in a puddle on a rainy day in this fun and enjoyable poem. I could easily picture the scene and how Kieran felt. It was refreshing to see how rain can become a joyful weather as many adults moan about the rain, but to a child in new wellies it is just the best thing!
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem is a well-written musing on impending death. The situation is full of realism as you describe the visits from the hospice nurse and how the speaker of the poem is waiting for death, living slowly on day by day. This is poignant, but the focus of the poem on the everyday visits of the nurse stops this sinking to being overly sentimental.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This poem is thoughtful and invites readers to spend time pondering the lines to tease out their meanings. I always think it's the mark of a good poem that each time it is read new meanings are found. The cat philosophically pondering life and death has a modern Shakespearean quality to it. The descriptions are original and astonishing. These were some of my favourites:

he has plutonium eyes
toxic but delicious
a trail of spilled milk
for a tail, nails as teeth
and a hammerhead tongue

and:

instead of fur,
he is covered in mold
as if he were past
his expiration date
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Review of Dream Catchers  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
This is an informative and fascinating read - I learned a lot here. I have a white feather dream catcher given to me by a friend and I knew that they catch bad dreams, but the other information here was new to me. I liked how men have eagle feathers and women owl feathers in their dream catchers. The legend with the old woman and the little boy was a lovely read. You have put a lot of time and thought into writing this.
Do you mean day of lady here: The old day whispered
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Review of Jessica's Cloud  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
Awh, this is such a sweet poem. The idea of Jessica’s name being initialed in the sky as a message to her grandma was lovely. The poem expresses how every everyday scenes like clouds can express special meaning. The family bonds are lovingly captured here.
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Review of Personapumpkin  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This story transforms the traditional Halloween experience of pumpkin carving into a macabre and chilling event where the pumpkin becomes a kind of wronged ghost looking on at the Halloween scene. Personifying the pumpkin and having him looking on at the children Trick or Treating and meditating on his life growing and being carved into a lantern is an original idea that makes this piece memorable. I felt sorry for the pumpkin lantern and expected him to become a malevolent spirit haunting the humans!
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is an amusing snd thoughtfully written piece that captures the magic of Halloween for children. The costumes and sweets are described well and you made a great point about there needing to be different seasonal themed events to keep our interest, even if Halloween does seem to start too early in the shops!
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Review of Tinker Toy  
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
Tinker looks adorable - I didn't realise you had a dachshund. I have a disabled dog called Merry, he has been in a wheelchair for over 9 years due to IDVV but manages to get around well. He's a great character and I get lots of people stopping to admire his wheelchair.
I'm reading 'Schooled' at the moment and enjoying the characterisation - you have a knack at that. I'll leave a review when I've finished it.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a cute and easy to follow poem. The rhyme gives the story a nice flow and makes it memorable. I love the cute kittens and children will find the poem very visual and amusing. I liked the part where Nell has to take the bus as her broomstick is too small to hold her and the kittens. The different types of hats that don't fit her create a sense of dilemma to her situation.
I'd like an extra section adding describing the hat that Nell chooses so I can picture it - it must be a smart one for her to think of wearing it to the witch's ball!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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for entry "Blue Winged Fairy
Review by HollyMerry
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
This is a beautifully written poem about a fairy with blue wings and how she meets a dragon friend. It reminded me of Elsa and Nokk as the dragon comes to the fairy when she needs him. They both like the colour blue and the fairy comes to see that the dragon is a friend even though at first he seems scary.
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Review by HollyMerry
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
This touching story of how a kitten helped comfort broken hearts is heart-warming. I love the use of alliteration in the title 'smitten with a kitten.' I was sorry to hear that you lost a pet cat as well as your daughter. Thankfully the sweet kitten came into your lives to provide a caring presence. My friend has a cat called Gobbolino - it's a lovely storybook name for a cat.
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