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667 Public Reviews Given
675 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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76
76
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Audrea,
I found your memoir of the tornado on the Tribute page.
I live about 3 hours from Joplin. I have written two poems about the storm, though I was not in it. I see from your memories my understanding is quite inadequate. I thank you for sharing this. I think about you and your neighbors often. I have talked with 4 people who experienced that storm and they all get a certain expression on their faces when they discuss it. I imagine you do too. I am so glad you survived with your family and friends. I hope that one day soon, the terror diminishes and only returns if you need it, and I hope you never need it again.
Again, thank you for sharing.
Louise
77
77
Review of Fragrant Moment  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
With Valentine's Day coming, this is especially timely. It is sweet, fragrant, and loving. I see no problem with it and think it is really quite clever. I certainly hope it is written for someone very special to you. I hope you make a card around it and leave it on her pillow.
Thanks for sharing.
Keep writing.
Louise
78
78
Review of Memories  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE NEWBIE REVIEWE...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
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Hello Marqese Dabbs,
Welcome to WDC.
*RainbowL* I am reviewing your poem, which I found on the read and review page, as part of the Simply Positive Newbe Reviewers Group. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: You have written a sad poem in which the "I" is dealing with the unwelcome pain of unresolved difficulties that keep surfacing in their mind. The poem has a very personal tone. Your images are intense, and, consistently with the experience of the "I," there is considerable ambivalence. *RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: your choice of image using the photos, and of bleeding memories. Then, there is an element of fighting back when the speaker says "burn the pain..." In the end, the issue remains unresolved. I like that you don't make it into a sermon and preach wisdom but instead leave the problem unresolved. *Vine2*

*Vine1* Problems and suggestions: In line 8, I wonder if the "I" is comforted by silence or by something else within silence. Line 10 "things" is plural but "is" is singular. In line 11, to what does "It's" refer? Does it mean the pain is always struggling, or the ambition, or the "I?" *Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: This is a very interesting poem and I really appreciate you sharing it. *BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth
79
79
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE NEWBIE REVIEWE...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi Netty,
Welcome to WDC!
You have written a spiritual poem expressing your fears and faith. You use the symbolism of sudden exposure present in the pulling back of a curtain effectively.

In line four, the "in in" requires correction. Line 7, "to awaken my soul" seems unnecessary. If you feel a need to say this, it might work better to say something like: "will my soul be awakened by the sounds of..."
In line 8, it looks as if "array" should be "a ray."

I enjoyed reading this. Thank you for sharing.
Louise
80
80
Review of Untitled  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Purple Princess,
This is a rather enigmatic poem, thought-provoking as well as emotionally grabbing. It gives me feelings of confusion and discomfort and feelings of compassion for the "I" in the poem. Your imagery is rich and compelling. I like that it is short and concise as that increases the intensity and focuses the emotion of the reader. Good work!
Thanks for sharing.
Keep writing,
Louise
81
81
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*RainbowL* Hi Tristan,
I am reviewing your poem, which I found in "read and review," as part of the Simply Positive Review team. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: This short prose poem uses personification of two streets a lamp post, a hydrant, and shadows. My first thought was of TS Eliot.
I've read that poem so many times: The love song of J. Alfred Prufrock?
*RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: I love personification. I love the giving of voice to the voiceless, having a lamppost say what the author wants to say. My favorite part is:
The lamp-post agonizes over loss,
over the drowning of the day
and the fear of the night. *Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think*Problems and suggestions:I have a problem with the first three lines: The curb calls for those who pass
with longing eyes of thrice-chewed
strawberry gum.
It it took a while to understand the part about the gum.*Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: I like this poem as it presents a vivid picture full of life, though all is man-made.*BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
82
82
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
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*RainbowL* I am reviewing as part of the Simply Positive Review team. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: This is a spiritual poem set in an imaginary cave. It is rhymed: abab, acac, adad. It is rhythmic but has an irregular meter. *RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: The rhyme scheme is a challenge and I like it. I like the mood, established with clear images. *Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think*Problems and suggestions:I think it needs a little more "exposition," more detail. It describes a scene but I feel I don't really know the key issue. Why is the acolyte there? Where is the teacher? Perhaps the acolyte's prayer as another stanza would be a good way to add more substance? *Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments:This is interesting but feels like it is only part of a bigger story. *BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth
83
83
Review of To be Deaf  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Endless SG,
Thank you for sharing this. It is an interesting experience and you tell it well. I like the details you included. I also like that you tried to understand without hearing your son, rather than just taking off the earphones immediately. It became a teaching/learning moment for both of you.
The only problem with the entire thing is the last sentence. (As a mental health professional, this is a pet peeve of mine. Please be patient with me.) ADD is a developmental "disorder" that I like to think of as just another way of being human. Your son is not a disorder. He is Jon, your son. He has ADD. He is human.
Thank you for sharing this interesting essay.
Louise
84
84
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Bob,
Very interesting thinking, here. If you don't mind, I would like to respond rather than critiquing your writing. I am not Catholic, so I speak from a Protestant perspective.

To me, the Pope is the executive director who sets the tone and direction for the church in the present. He represents Peter and Christ. Peter denied Christ, and Christ loved him anyway. The Pope represents our human and our spiritual sides. The person acting as Pope tries to live up to the Christ part and every now and then manages to get it right for a moment. The best he ever really does, in the end, is function as the head disciple. What is he good for? Well, we might just as well ask what are we good for? There really is no difference between the Pope and the pauper in the eyes of God. As for sexual fantasies, it is improbable that the Pope never has them. It is probable that he resists and confesses and goes on with his life and work.

Thanks for leading me to think. I appreciate your sharing.
85
85
Review of Hauntings  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Hi Joy,
I found this in "read and review." It is astonishing! the images are visceral and the mood is intense. My initial impression is one of hopelessness and despair. Then I thought about social pressure around substance use, about a "bad trip," and about the hangover from hell. Then I re-read it. This time I heard about shame, social condemnation, a public career crashing and burning. Sadly, I think a lot of people could identify with the emotion of this piece.
I see no problem with the writing, nothing that seems to not match or fit or feels wrong.
Thank you for sharing this.
86
86
Review of Answered Prayer  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi Drifter,
Your essay is well written and well reasoned. I especially like that it is brief and concise. When reading, I noticed the references were all to the "Old Testament." I like that. I also like your illustration of dinner provided just when you need it.
I didn't notice any problems with the writing.
Good work!
Thank you,
Elizabeth
87
87
Rated: E | (3.0)
Hello Percy Goodfellow,
Thank you for sharing your piece. I find it well written until the last couple of sentences which I cannot follow. What little old lady? This assumes the reader knows the reference.

Considering the quality of the essay, I find it a bit obtuse. It seems to be based on a lot of assumptions that you don't back up. For example, I have been hearing about microbial life in the universe for years. I have all this space information popping up on my screen every time I open my computer. It has a lot of information and seems to be pretty straightforward. I think it is from NASA. To me, there is a big difference between seeing signs that life may be there and saying we know for a fact it is there. The star system you mention is important because there might be life like ours in some form or other. I have seen no evidence that NASA engages in deceit. Consequently, as your reader, I am depending on you to provide some evidence that this is happening. Without evidence, this is a well-written opinion piece with no content to convince me of the merit of your thinking.

It would help a lot if you would cite examples with references.

Your writing is very good.

Thank you again for sharing.
Elizabeth
88
88
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Prosperous Snow,
This reads very smoothly and delivers well-ordered reasoning. I totally agree with the sentiment and wish I had written it. I see nothing to change or improve. I think it is "well baked" and ready to go.
Thank you very much for sharing your good work!
Elizabeth
89
89
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I really like this. I wonder if you meant it to be in paragraph form? It reads as if it is meant to be in stanzas rather than being a prose poem. When I was reading, I was thinking you could have been talking about plants not being heard, or wild animals, or small children, or old people, or poor people. Your repetition of words brought more and more different voices into my head. Thank you.

Elizabeth







1
90
90
Review of MEMORIES  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi JJDel,
As you were so kind as to review one of my poems, I decided to review yours. It is full of love and of sadness. I am able to follow the experience and easily identify with it. Who of us has not lost a loved one and grieved? That is definitely one of those times a writer is likely to take up the pen and write. You have done so quite well.

I have one suggestion. I wonder how it would be for you to change the name of the poem to Mittens?

Thank you for sharing.
Elizabeth
91
91
Review of The Dragon Hotel  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Wonderful! I enjoyed every word!
92
92
Rated: E | (5.0)
Oh I like this! Orange-agent as opposed to agent-orange. My oh my! Thanks for the laugh.
Elizabeth
93
93
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi Jules,
I did find this entertaining and funny: not belly laugh funny but smile the whole time I'm reading funny. I wonder, though, why people didn't just stop wearing snuzzle to the mall rather than giving up shopping altogether? I would very much love to have something like that to give to Kim Jon Il. Thanks for the cheerful experience.
94
94
Review of Logic  
Rated: E | (4.0)
It appears to me you have told this dream to the wrong person. lol
95
95
Review of Keep Smiling  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Hi Sinbad,
I like the sentiment and that you keep it short. This expresses one true key to good mental health and happiness.

I find the use of texting shortcuts distracting. I know it is possible to be happy using n instead of and. It is possible to be happy reading n instead of and. However, I would rather be happy reading the English language in tact, thank you.
Louise Wiggins is Elizabeth
96
96
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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*RainbowL* I am reviewing as part of the Simply Positive Review team. I found your story at the hub. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: The title amused me. I read through because I could see many ways you might go with that topic. *RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: I like that the IRS agent is concerned about freedom of speech. I very much like the preacherr's response. *Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think* Problems and suggestions: I don't know a lot about these things, but I suspect the IRS would be more concerned about the use of the pulpit for speech that is not permitted under IRS code such as political speech. As for hate speech, I don't think that is forbidden as local churches where I live engage in hate speech on their televised sermons: hate of homosexuals, hate of people who use or provide abortion etc. Consequently, I like the idea of someone checking on them and putting the preacher in that position. *Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: Light hearted and timely *BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
97
97
Review of Sand Storm  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is lovely, not maudlin as poems of this theme often are. I like how you turn your mood into hope.
98
98
Review of Winter Haiku 1  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*RainbowL* I was looking as some old reviews of my work and found a review you did. I liked what you expressed and decided to look into your portfolio. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: This is a very good example of a haiku. Without using personification, it communicates both drama and peace. *RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: The picture comes to me as a silhouette and then develops depth so that I might step in to hear the wings and feel the chill in the air of an evening looking out of the forest into the moonlight. What a wonderful moment! *Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think*Problems and suggestions: I see no problem. I hope you have lots of walks in the moonlight at the forest edge. *Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: Your biography places you in Maine, a place where I spent several happy days a long time ago. Perhaps this warmed me to your poem, too. *BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
99
99
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
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*RainbowL* I am reviewing as part of the Simply Positive Review team. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore. *RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: I want to be in your writing class. I want to walk that trail with you and your children!*RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: I read this after reading someone else's review (the last review you got before mine.)
While I was reading, I was picturing each thing that you mentioned. I saw the cicada fly past my head and heard the buzzing in the trees. I saw Quinn with her backpack and the doll peeking out. I saw her climbing that trail: Such energy and 5-year-old confidence! I saw Caiden eyeing that mushroom and it eying him back, while you sat with your notebook and pen in hand. And I felt proud of Caiden when he made it to the top of the hill and proud of Quinn for how she helped Caiden overcome his fear. It was a wonderful adventure indeed!*Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think*Problems and suggestions: I saw no problems. My only suggestion is that you take more walks with your wonderful children and write all about it. *Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: I hope one day to see your article about walkinng the Appalachian Trail*BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth
100
100
Review of Autumnal Dance  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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*RainbowL* I am reviewing as part of the Simply Positive Review team. I offer my opinion based on my limited experience. It is only one in a world of opinions and yours to use or ignore.*RainbowR*

*RainbowL* *MugB* Overall Impression: This Saraband poem uses the form based on dance to talk about dancing leaves. *RainbowR*

*Vine1* What I like: I had not heard of this form before and I like having my horrizons expanded. I like the use of the word "mistral" in a way that could just as well have been "minstrel." The rhythm and rhyme work perfectly. *Vine2*


*Vignette2* *Think*Problems and suggestions: I wonder if "leaves" might work better as the first word of line 5. "They" is quite ambiguous,
which is a good thing in a poem, so it might be better to leave it alone. (pun intended)*Vignette2*


*BalloonR* Comments: It is good to see your work again. *BalloonR*

*Earth* Thank you for sharing.

*Quill* Keep writing *Smile* !

Elizabeth


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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