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1,582 Public Reviews Given
1,583 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

I find it hard to critique poetry because it is pure self-expression and who can judge a person’s heart? Hence I will tell you about my likes about your short poem. You did a nice job of communicating the trapped feeling of a soul with each stanza. It ends how it begins with complete sorrow and defeat. I take this to be a metaphor but I cannot tell exactly of what. Would you clarify? All in all this was a good and somber (in a pleasant way) narration worthy of a high rating.
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Hmm…this sounds a lot like socialism, but in your case it works. You have an interesting premise that may very well be the start of a good saga. One thing I would say is to go easy on the parenthesis. Also you may want to try to put in a story fashion rather than just stating facts in succession. I do realize this is a first person prologue but I would put in a little memories or reflection. I would have loved to have to seen the chemical spill with my own eyes. Tell the reader when, where it happened and how it the public reacted to it with some detail. Overall it was a good read with impressive imagination. I hope you follow-through with the actual story! Happy WDC anniversary!
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Review of The Ghostly Heart  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie


You certainly have a good funny bone. I enjoyed it from beginning to end and it was very easy to follow. You actually made me laugh out loud at one point. Reading about a dude arguing with a house is quite humorous. I found two things that were awkward though. When you say “head-like head” in your line below it sounds superfluous. Instead you might say “head-like materialization or some other word.


"The swirling, condensing figure twisted its increasingly head-like head."

Also with the statement below, thoughts should be in italics.

And who am I to disappoint?

Like I said, this was very funny and entertaining and you deserve the ribbon. Happy WDC Anniversary!
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Review of Arina's Last hope  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie


This was a very immersive story and your beginning really hooked and mystified me. I loved the description when Arina is flying over the mountains and when she observes the battle; very picturesque. I did have slight difficulty following the battle narration but that may just be me. Also when you refer to the blue dragon as just “blue” it may confuse certain people. Finally, when you say-

"Suddenly the air was filled with hundreds of Harpies, their raptor claws tearing at the dragons’ scaled hides with astonishing ferociousness."

-it sounds like the harpies literally just appeared from thin air. Say where they are coming from. Oh, and you capitalized "harpies" in the above line.

Just like the opening narrative, the ending was wonderful. The gloominess of it was a surprise; no happy ending here! Great work!
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Review of Home  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

I’m horrible at critiquing and I tend to just give enragement and say what I l personally think about the piece being reviewed. In light of that I’ll begin by saying you did a good job of making such an impacting impression with such a little space. As you might have been told in another review, your ending hook was great. I would have liked to have heard a little of the short conversation two had. Also it would have been enticing to see a little emotion from Carl. Maybe you could have made Samuel hold back just a few tears or narrate a direct action or thought such as “My heart felt that that familiar longing I always had when I was around him.” This would also provide a curiosity at why he felt something familiar. Anyway these are just my two cents. Once again this was nostalgically great! Happy WDC anniversary!
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Review of Motherhood  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

I think this is a good revealing to us guys what mothering must be like. You totally brought me into her emotions and you did a decent job with the small word limit. I think I found a typo with this line below where there should be a comma after “slept.”

"For the first hour he’d finally slept she held her breath and rocked...)

I noticed how it began sad and ended sad. I think this only makes your story stick out more. A little bit of melancholy is always good. Kudos to you for your take on the prompt that is worthy of four-and-a-half stars!
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Review of Escape  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

As you might surmise, there are a lot of people who emphasize with you. Thankfully anger is not an issue for me for the most part. Whenever I get stressed or overwhelmed I tend to cringe and shut down. If I do get angry, I hold it in bottled up which is not healthy I know. It is nice to take a semi-vacation to some place and unload I’m sure. Have you ever tried going to the gym? It really helps with any emotional problem. Thanks for divulging a segment of your personal life. And have a happy WDC anniversary!
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Review of Brace for Impact  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Not a bad read. I was curious about what was going to happen to Commodore Nathan Lewis right before Nathan woke up. It was short but I think you did a good job of making the most of it. One thing I would have like to have seen brief emotion on the part of Lewis and more overall description; doing so might raise your average rating. Happy WDC anniversary! Write on!
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Review of The Lost Son  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Wow, this was deep. Each stanza is full of words and phrases that are supple and were beautifully rendered. I like how in every stanza you identify a notion or individual and how you offer help and love to each person. Its’ like hurt that gets mended and given ointment. I hope you continue to write such lovely poetry. Have a happy WDC anniversary!
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Review of The Echo  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Wow, such vivid, ambient description. That emptiness you speak of is like an ancient spirit reciting a doleful ode. You really created the mood to a point. The image that comes to my mind is a cold, soulless mountain forest with a somber moon over head as I feel the lifeless wind chill my skin with a fleeting voice in the air. It could not have been better.
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Review of Of Water  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

This was very lovely. It seems you are making an analogy of Christ’s precious blood to water which is the ancient element of life. However you do not differentiate from what seems pure water and divine holy water. It all runs together; unless that was your intent. Nevertheless, you stole my emotions and my heart. Great work! BTW, DId you spend time revising this?
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Review of I am Sham  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

You know, allot of people feel like they’re mere and insignificant. I think at one point we all try to measure or judge ourselves; in the end everyone is the same just with different quarks and desires. A good number of individuals compare themselves to others and they think their life is a sham, but like I said before, everyone is unique. Thanks for sharing!
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Review of Silver and White  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)

Hello again and congrats on being featured on the Hub Request Reviews section. Like I said before I can’t think of a way to criticize poetry that much seeing it is self-expression. I am very fascinated with dreams and I am curious as to how that got into your subconscious. I think dreams have meanings or at least wishes or fears that affect us more than we know. Thanks for sharing!
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Review of Underdog  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

I found this to be a very charming narration. I really think that female dogs are as smart as males. For instance; whenever I say my girl dog Nimue’s name she doesn’t react at all but my male dog will look straight at you even you call his name. What do you think? Anyway this was very charming and thanks for sharing. Kudos!
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (3.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

This has the potential to be appealing but it needs more coherency and narrative structure. Also remember to use quotation marks when people speak and italics when someone thinks. You did not say why he was shrunken but you stated it happen in an explosion. You need to clarify that. I would also listen to any other advice that you might have gotten from other reviews. Keep writing and happy WDC anniversary.
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

This was a lovely poem and it was in my favorite style; couplets. All my poetry is in this form. Where do you get your inspiration?-or does it just flow out naturally? That is how it is with me although I do find inspiration in the Bible however as well. I love the mystical feel of your poem and the beauty of it. Congrats for the ribbon too! Kudos!
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Review of Frozen Chicken  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Ah, so short but so satirical. I love the anticlimactic ending that just pops out of the blue. At the end I was like “Okay this is interesting.” I have never seen so much admiration for such a short work from your prefect rating average. I agree too. So this is published huh?-is it online or print? Anyway, you have a quant, surprising wit. Keep it up!
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Congratulations to you for your descriptive prowess. I especially liked these lines-

The rain became heavier, clobbering the ground mercilessly as if in retribution for some long past transgression.

Both stood high and proud. One of them seemed slightly discontent, the other overly defiant, yet both held a look of mystery, intelligence, and purpose in their eyes. They were doing this because they wanted to, not because they were forced to. He suddenly felt somewhat less significant
.

This was decently engaging for being so short. Not a bad job indeed. You also did nice job with pertaining to the senses to illustrate it and bring me in to the story. You had quite a horrid and surprising ending. Kudos for that. Keep writing man.
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Review of First Encounters  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Thanks for sharing this emotionally in-depth account of past feelings. I loved this story because it is a true memory and that is, in my opinion, a thing that cannot be critiqued. One part I like was when you contrasted the look of her eyes with her outward demeanor. That was cool. So did you ever become more than friends at any time? Do you know where Cathrine is now? Anyway this was a very charming narration and I hope you are happy and at peace about her.
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

What an appealing children’s story. I actually was drawn into it myself. I liked the mystifying part with Deidre the tree dryad; it had a lovely, fanciful charm. It was short but I was not deterred by that because it was made for children. Had it been for adults I’d say it was way too abrupt at the ending. Congrats for the ribbon as well. Once again great work! BTW, was it ever your intention to publish your works? Just curious.
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

I am very curious as to what exactly the creature in the forest is. Is it a griffin?-or some other mythical being if legend? It feels like you had no trouble coming up with this first person POV narrative. It was creepy and it hooked me the whole way through. All that the creature said was very enticing. Keep writing and have happy WDC anniversary!
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Review of Wait for me  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie


This is the second review I’ve done on a long time so bear with me. I found your poem very honest and you clearly express the attachment for this other person. I personally would not trust my heart that much with any flawed human but I figure you must know this person well enough to divulge yourself I this manner. This was a lovely poem and you have a rich heart. Happy WDC anniversary!
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Kudos to you and to the generous giver. I hope the anonymous giver will feel extra good for an entire poem written for him or her. The sig warms my heart. I really can’t see how to critique a thank you poem so this is plain exceptional stuff. I like how you pulled out material from WDC related things to create your poem. So did you ever find out who it was?
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Review of Threshold  
Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Great work with this; I loved it. You did a good job of illustrating the premise with the train situation and it was easy to follow. It was suspenseful the way you revealed the fate of Russell with cryptic occurrences. I can see why you got the ribbon. I found his power came out of nowhere at the end however. For me personally, I wish you would have somehow hinted to Russell’s special strength earlier. You might have mentioned something in his past or a sense that he was different his whole life in a subtle way. That is just what I think. Feel free to disregard it. This certainly merits your high rating. Congratulations to you for making it into the editor’s pick in this edition of the Authors Newsletter! I envy you!
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Review by brom21
In affiliation with The Coffee Shop for the Fantas...  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Anniversary Reviews email siggie

Nice job with this one. It was easy to follow and I totally lost track of time and I found myself at the end before I knew it. The age old question “Why am I here?” is something we all ask ourselves, as you pointed out. Some people find the answer when they approach the Bible. I’ve been raised with the Bible so I have never asked that question. I really want to stress how easy it as to follow; it is something I particularly look for. You did not bore me either like most real life adaption stories I have read. Great work!
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