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712 Public Reviews Given
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I try my best to read everything on Writing.com with great care. My reviews always include a first impression, my feelings about theme and structure and where appropriate, some thoughts about possible revisions.*Mugr*
I'm good at...
I give my best reviews on stories, poems and articles that hold my interest and stir up my emotions.~~ *Smile*
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Religious/Spiritual,Romance, Historical, Mystery, Fantasy and Sci-Fi.~~ *Cool*
Least Favorite Genres
Erotica and Vampire/Werewolf/Zombie.
Favorite Item Types
Short Stories, Poems, Articles and Essays. ~~
Least Favorite Item Types
lessons and puzzles. ^^*Mugr*
I will not review...
Will not review anything with a rating over 18; no horror or erotica.^^*Mugr*
Public Reviews
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176
176
Review of A Walk  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Feather Pen , I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , participating in a review challenge in the "King's Landing updating " .
 
I enjoyed reading your work and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your words in "A Walk "  inspired.
 
*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FIRST INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

In the prose piece “A Walk,” the reader is challenged to meet up with the desperate need of the protagonist to just run. It is unclear what the motivation is, other than that he is all alone possibly due to some extraordinary tragedy, we are not sure. The sense is the protagonist is used to having a nurturing person in his life, but now, there is no one to meet his need for hugs and support and reassurance.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* INSPIRED *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

Stricken by fear, sorrow, grief and despair there does not seem to be any relief except from a scream that stuns the silence. It cracks through the night but then is so absorbed that there is nothing left to do but keep moving. The images are stark and inspire the soul of the reader to visit a dark place in the night world, just out of the reach of love, forgiveness, and hope.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FAVORITE MOMENT

The images you created are riveting. The scene was striking and left me with the feeling that I had been to this place before – in a troubling dream perhaps. This was one of my most favorite moments:

I sat back down at the sight of my deadly killer, a thin tabby cat. He looked at me and meowed loudly, being completely alone and at the lowest point in my young life I said "hi there" he just looked at me and darted after a mouse,

This moment sums up the protagonists world at this point in time. It is a nice touch. Buried in all of the emotional breakdown is the soul of a person who still seeks life, but whose dungeon of despair is so deep that even the solace of night marauder is fleeting.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* SUGGESTIONS *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

“A walk” is a good beginning to something bigger and more complete. I was drawn to what you created by the emotion and inner conflict. At the same time there is a good balance between the inner workings of the protagonist and the observations made of the person’s surroundings. My only suggestion would be expand the piece so that the reader can grasp fully your character’s motivation for the depressive state they are in.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* MORE INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

It has been a long time since experiencing the desolation experienced by the protagonist in “A Walk.” Your story brings to life that dark side I used to dwell in with vivid clarity and jarring truth. I remember, even though I want to forget. There were demons there and I am glad they are gone…for now. Thank you for sharing your talent and gift for expressive writing. *Smile*


♫~ Kenword~♫ *Shield1**Shield1**Writing*
 
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177
177
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello ashes2094, I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , participating in a review challenge in the "King's Landing updating " .
 
I enjoyed reading your work and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your words in "Beautiful Soul That Was Robin Williams "  inspired.
 
*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FIRST INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

In this haunting poem, the legacy of actor Robin Williams is capture full force to offer a tribute to his humanity and genius. The words and images ring with sweet truth about a man who gave up so much of himself to be the consummate entertainer for untold generations. Every word you use in your poem reflects your love and genuine respect for Robin William’s offerings as an actor, story teller and humanitarian.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* INSPIRED *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

The tribute to one of America’s foremost talents is both optimistic and hopeful in its tone and rhythm . Not only is your poem an open narrative of your feelings for the man, but it has a way of drawing me away from my day-to-day concerns to say a prayer for the family, friends and fans who still grieve his passing. As your poem conveys, Robin’s impact went far beyond his ability to entertain us to a place of inspiring us to look to the joys of being for others.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FAVORITE MOMENT

The respectful tone in all of your words and images is obviously heartfelt and drew my interest into your thoughts and memories immediately. This was one of my most favorite moments:

A man of many faces and humble birth,
with his heart full of love
and cherubic smile,

You have captured a special essence that was Robin Williams and probably one of the endearing qualities that will always remain for those of us who loved him. No matter what character he played there was always that smile that would come through. It was an assurance that it is all about the play … and to play is to find a heart full of love.


*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* SUGGESTIONS *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

The tone and feel of your tribute are remarkable and convey with great beauty, a sincere, artistic representation of the man admired by so many. I wouldn’t recommend changing anything.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* MORE INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

Robin Williams will live on in the astounding body of work he left behind. Everything about him was unique and expressive. Your poem inspires me to remember the sheer joy and complete abandon he approached all of life with. Thank you for sharing your gift of poetry.*Smile*


♫~ Kenword~♫ *Shield1**Shield1**Writing*
 
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178
178
Review of The Bridge Beyond  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello anne , I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , participating in a review challenge in the "King's Landing updating " .
 
I enjoyed reading your work and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your words in "The Bridge Beyond"  inspired.
 
*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FIRST INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

What beautiful, delicate images you use in your poetry. "The Bridge Beyond" is masterfully created and a pleasure to read, both to myself and out loud. I appreciate the way the piece is constructed and each verse leads me onward with anticipation of what images may lie ahead. In every way I felt glad for the person on the journey, even when it was time to rejoin family and friends. Extremely compelling.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* INSPIRED *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

There is, I believe, as your poem illustrates beautifully, another side, as we pass from this life into another. Your descriptions of the “way” that leads to the “Golden Gates,” inspires hope - and even though it was not the sojourners time, glorious is the hope that has been imparted for the one who has experienced ahead of time the way that leads to new life. Great inspirational writing!

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* FAVORITE MOMENT

Every verse spoke vividly to my heart and soul a new vision for what it is life to pass beyond our known world into the unknown. For me this was one of my favorite moments:

Spans a delicate bridge of the purest gems
Floating in a soft blue celestial sky

The gems of heaven have great meaning and the vision that the path that goes that way has a bridge that is constructed of those gems is a striking image to hold on to. That it floats in a sky that is the purest of blues is exhilarating to take in.

*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*
*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* SUGGESTIONS *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

Everything about your poem, the rhyming scheme, rhythm, tone, visuals, sensory stimulation, and theme awakened in me a view of life beyond this one that was pure refreshment and a joy to read. I felt that your piece was perfect in every way!


*Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown* MORE INSPIRATION *Crown**Crown**Crown**Crown*

Occasionally my soul will wander into the distant lands beyond the reality of the waking, breathing world and I will find the expanses of silver mountains, a shimmering city, trees that bare so much fruit that is hard to imagine a world of starvation that I left behind even for a moment. I appreciate all the wonderful thoughts your writing inspired for me and thank you for an exquisite journey. *Smile*


♫~ Kenword~♫ *Shield1**Shield1**Writing*
 
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179
179
Review of Glass Statue  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi  Victorianique , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your wonderful poem  "Glass Statue"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your poem and it was a delight to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
The metaphor of a human being formed out of glass that is in the hands of a mad sculptor works well in the poem “Glass Statue.” In the beginning the hands are well known but seem distant and above it all and then the hands give away the role of sculptor and others in the world become the hands. All the while the one being sculpted has been convinced that it is their fault that they must be broken and remolded.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
Being raised and nurtured in an atmosphere that perpetuates the notion that one is “not good enough,” is brutal. It is like being made of glass, unprotected from the chips, cracks, breaks and shattering that is inevitable - one is not given value for how they have been created. The result is the person becomes nothing but an object that because it will never be good enough, suffers thousands of abuses.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is written with a rhyming pattern that while random, is easy to follow and enjoy. Each stanza is followed with an eight line verse that reminds the reader that there is a life-long process at work in the life of the protagonist. Many of the lines end with sharp syllables that seem to shorten the breath as the poem is read out loud. While the images are filled with light there is an ominous feel because of the tones crackle with the cuts and tears the have been experienced through life thus far.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENTS
 
The whole poem was a compelling read and was a journey that became hopeful as the statue made resolve after resolve to take control of its glass like destiny. These were a couple of my favorite moments:

If they are mean
Then it must mean
That there is something
wrong with me
 
The word “mean,” with its two different uses in this stanza, play with the reader and contain a mocking tone from the one who has been given directions/orders on the way-to-be. They were intended to prevent the chips and the cracks that are after all inevitable. But rather than care about the good advice, the person lumps the admonitions, suggestions and commandments as yet more of the ways that one will “break”, “chip,” and “crack.”
 
Now I know
You aren’t my prince
And I don’t need
To be rescued
I’ll find my own tribe
 
The rhyme is gone and the rhythm stops so words can become two uncharacteristic statements : “You aren’t my prince,” (Excellent. Declarative with direct, no-superlative phrasing) “I don’t need to be rescued,”too, are exacting words that lift the mood of the poem from “being at the mercy of another,” to “I am my own.” At this point I would expect the person to shove anything away from themselves that was intended to chip, crack and break them.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

Your poem seems perfect in every way to me.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I wasn’t aware of any need for edits or revisions.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
Within the poem, “Glass Statue,” is a story about the ways and means a person becomes transformed from something of transient value, to a person of great worth. A treasure. The process of coming to the end is crushing, but at the end, is a hope that will live on in the lives of children who are influenced by the one who has gained glorious wisdom. Beautiful! Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
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180
180
Review of What am I?  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  IanM.Raugh , 
 
I selected  "What am I?"  from your portfolio to read and review as my way of saying, “Congratulations On Your Anniversary On Writing.com.” I enjoyed reading your poem and am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings about what you have created.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
The conflict is quickly and decisively established in the extremely personal poem “What Am I”. The answer to the question is a journey that is framed in by moments of voids - flavorless, colorless and dreary - in every way they are the oppressive reality of the surrounding landscape. But within in the question itself, I sense there is a ray of hope to lighten the depressed soul in this dark time of melancholy.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
The turning and the search, finding strength and solace in the soul, this is what moved and inspired me in your poem. Unfortunately for many, perhaps beaten to frequently by life, there is no search for new vision and hope. My spirit immediately rises as you resolve to seek something different than the old rhythms of life that no longer have a flavor.

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENT
 
Your poem is thoughtfully written with deep insight into the human soul and I enjoyed all of the images you have created. This, though, was my favorite:

“humor does naught:
To be distraught.
so I turn.”

 
Laughter is a good medicine, if one can find it. It can lift one out of momentary despair. But for the long journey where all joy is lost there is no humor. All life has become a senseless tragedy. And with no other fanfare or vanity to hold to the familiar path, there is a turn. I love that this revelation is unadorned. It is a straight forward resolution to go a direction away from the faded past into a seeking for something that stimulates and produces life again.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your piece as written and I think it is perfect the way it is.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION
 
Can a single question lift one out of the mire of depression? I believe it can – if it is the right question. For the poet, there must always be the deliberate encounter with self that requires a question to be asked. The question has to be honest and fearless in order to draw out of the writer the truth. “What Am I?” is one of those questions. You have taken a courageous step in being a poet. In the search for the answer to this question is growth as a person and a poet. Your courage will inspire others to ask the hard question. Well done. Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

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181
181
Review of Crystals  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  Luka Vaughn , 
 
I selected  "Crystals"  from your portfolio to read and review as my way of saying, “Congratulations On Your Anniversary On Writing.com.” I enjoyed reading your prose/poem piece and am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings about what you have created.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Finding a treasure, rare jewels, a fortune in gold and silver, while momentarily exhilarating, these moments have no equal in finding the eyes of a love who takes you to another place. You have eloquently painted a dramatic picture of the one woman who will be your all and all forever. She will own your soul and all in life will be goodness and light because crystal blue has become your standard now for all of life. What else can compare? What else could a man give himself to? He has already found the greatest treasure.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
Azure blue eyes appear to hold all the emotions before a man and his desire to embrace all the height and depths of those emotions. It is for the soul to decide how these emotions will shape the writer's future. But there is little doubt that the glory of her eyes have drawn him into a home they will share together – and it will be filled with love. 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENT
 
Your writing is stellar and I enjoyed all of the images you have created. This, though, was my favorite:

“It's as if she were staring into the center of my being, judging me, collecting images from my past long forgotten.”

 
The element of time is softly introduced into your paragraph through this sentence. Not only do we feel drawn into the beauty and mystery of her eyes, but we are compelled to not look away, as her eyes study our history, our core beliefs and those things that are dear to us. We dare not look away too soon, because something in us wants her to know everything. As rare as the treasure is - so rare is this moment of becoming one with the one we adore.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your piece as written and I think it is perfect the way it is.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION
 
“Crystal” is a tribute to a woman whose beauty is centered in her eyes. She searches the soul of the one she desires as the beauty of her eyes compels her intended to open up the core of his being that they may know the truth about each other, without saying a word. Thanks for sharing this splendid picture. Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

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182
182
Review of I've Seen Hope  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  Buterflydreams , 
 
I selected  "I've Seen Hope"  from your portfolio to read and review as my way of saying, “Congratulations On Your Anniversary On Writing.com.” I enjoyed reading your poem and am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings about your piece.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
I am inspired by your unique vision of hope. You have used some powerful contrasting images to express hope’s range of being: “sweet like honey,” “…tongue is sharp”, “…soul…of glass shards,” “like stained glass.” I love the premise that hope creates something out of nothing. As one who has beaten the odds - where being a complete failure was the most likely outcome - I know absolutely that my destiny all changed when hope found me.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
Hope , like a vital, powerful human force, has a soul and spirit that the poet defines. There is an edge to this impressive being, but the greatest challenges in life may be assigned to her office and the laughter, dreams and loves that mankind hungers for can and will be realized.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENTS
 
Your poem was filled with great pleasures for me and these were particularly wonderful moments for me:

“Her tongue is sharp
But her voice always rings of truth”

 
Blessed are those who can stand before hope’s determination to speak the truth. Her tongue has to be sharpened to divide the light from the dark and the lie from the truth.
 
“She pours her all into nothing
Until nothing becomes something extraordinary”

 
I’ve been to the brink and stared at an abyss of nothingness. Life was done with me and I had no vision for tomorrow. I’m not even sure how hope came in. But suddenly she was there. She whispered nonsense at first and then suddenly I began to see what she was creating. As I saw the wonders of what she decided would be mine I was delighted with the new life that unfolded before me. It has been an amazing journey ever since. Thank you hope!
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your poem. And other than this one typo it was perfect in every way for me.

And with all  hear(her) heart she believes

*Coffeer**Coffeer* ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION
 
With fresh contrasting images “I’ve Seen Hope,” is a beautiful tribute to one of the most positive forces the soul of man can experience. As you point out, she herself lives the human experience and when that experience has left a life that is nothing but ash, she can be the power that produces a glorious new life. I too have seen hope. She is radiant! Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

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183
183
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  ozhand, 
 
I selected  "The Escape Within "  from your portfolio to read and review as my way of saying, “Congratulations On Your Anniversary On Writing.com.” I enjoyed reading your work and am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings about your piece.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
There is stunning revelation as you write about each of the rooms you experienced as a child. Not only is the reader given the descriptions of each room, but also the raw emotion each room creates for you. Beginning with the overall warmth of the house my soul is ready to embrace the cozy feel when I am shown parts of the house where the underlying tensions of real family issues are introduced - room by room.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
This is a brilliant opening to something larger. One can sense with the child that everything about her home should and could have been perfect. Idyllic. Yet there was homework and parents and something else – unnamed tensions that one had to escape from. Your images were a reminder of my own favorite ways of escaping my reality. Within this girl's world is a reality that everyone growing up in a “perfect family” will identify with.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENT
 
The writing was excellent and I enjoyed with great pleasure each line of your piece. But this was a particularly wonderful moment for me:

“To the right was grandma’s bedroom; large, established, well furnished, over-packed, dark, and warm. Grandma’s room was a palace in an apartment. There I had my bed.”

 
I could sense immediately that this was the girl’s refuge. A sanctuary. It seemed to be the place where magic could happen. And so within herself – magic was possible.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your prose piece immensely and I would only suggest that it is a powerful beginning to a story I would enjoy reading.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* ADDITIONAL INSPIRATION
 
“The Place Within” speaks of an actual place within a little girl’s home. It is her place of refuge. But it is also the heart and soul of the girl. It is the place from where she can find rationale and reason for her life and find moments of peace and wonder! Well done. Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

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184
184
Review of Mom  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  JACE - House Targaryen , 
 
I am delighted to offer my review as a gift in honor of your account anniversary this month.
I chose to read your wonderful poem "Mom" from your portfolio. I enjoyed reading your work and it was a joy to read it several times in prep for this review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words that they may be an encouragement. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
The raw emotion of a grown child honoring "Mom" comes through your words with a tremendous amount of power and strength making your poem an awesome inspirational piece. The form adds to the drama and impact of the piece and together – words, images and form work to lift up my soul.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
Honoring the one who gives life with words that convey thankfulness, gladness and blessing is a beautiful act of humility and grace. I believe this is central to this piece and why it had so much impact for me. .
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
I am glad for your description of your poem’s structure as I was not familiar with this form. You used the Double Etheree form perfectly and the end result is a poem that conveys passion, emotion and a pleasing experience for the eyes and ears.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer* MY FAVORITE MOMENT
 
Your words, rhythm and tone come through beautifully throughout your entire piece. This was one of my favorite moments:

I watch how you treat people,
always with kindness and respect.
You are my model and my mentor.

 
The message in these lines is so complete and clear on two different levels. We do watch those who are central to our lives and take in and apply what we want from what we see. Also, others are watching us. What are we giving others that will be a benefit to them? Nice.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

The form, words and images were , for me, perfect in every way. *Smile*

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I wasn’t aware of any need for edits or revisions.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
I wish I would have appreciated my own mother in the way that has been expressed in your loving tribute to a “Mom”. In every way she could have been honored with these same words and I appreciate that you expressed these thoughts and feelings in should an honoring way. Thank you for sharing your gift! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
185
185
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hi  Harry , 
 
I am delighted to offer my review as a gift in honor of your account anniversary this month. I chose to read your wonderful poem  "It’s Not Your Life!"  from your portfolio. I enjoyed reading your work and it was a joy to read it several times in prep for this review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words that they may be an encouragement. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
I was immediately touched by the wisdom you have woven into this exquisite poem. The rhymes and tone, and the fluid motion of the poem provide a memorable way to catalog your valuable advice to draw on when rearing one’s child. The admonition in the words, though fabric to hold your images together, comes through with great power and strength.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
To rejoice in our children as they thrive in the gifting that has been bestowed upon them is vital to the health and well-being of our young people. But how often a parent sees "a-little-me" in their child and overlooks the reality that their child's path in life may diverge greatly from the one the parent craves.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is written in perfect pentameter with an alternate rhyming pattern. The tone was wonderfully light, helping to bring a persuasive feel to the words rather than sharp commands.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer* MY FAVORITE MOMENT
 
The whole poem was a pleasure to read with lyrical moments that were exhilarating. Of those these were a few of my favorites:

…taking care all the while
to allow their dreams for life to unfold.

 
This first instruction is soft in its outward cushioning, but it is a strong head butt for those of us who want to restrict, control, push and pull our child into our mold. Is it because my own dreams were squashed? Perhaps, but then I should be able to shake off the blunt correction life has generously offered me and give my child some room to experience the life path that is their destiny.
 
… for adult success and how to live well…
you must encourage, not try to compel.

 
This instruction is absolutely essential for the inspirational parent who wants a child to live well within the harmony and beauty of the family and always feel compelled by love and joy to return home.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I was pleased with every aspect of your writing and encouragement. I love it just the way it is. *Smile*

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I wasn’t aware of any need for edits or revisions.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
My step-mom often wondered why I never traveled home to be a part of the family, though my father had mending many of the torn down regions of our relationship. Even after so many years, I wasn’t the gift he wanted from the womb, and there was no way to erase that happenstance. Given that human nature never changes, your cautions are well founded and served up in a most pleasing fashion.Thank you for sharing your gift and insights! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
186
186
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi  Cocoa Peppurr , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome to our wonderful writing community.

I chose to read your dramatic prose  "How Does One Romance?"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your piece and it was a pleasure to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Super great narrative about teen, girl – boy, relationships, crushes, loves and romance. The detail is striking, as the feelings of likes and dislikes are interwoven with delightful introspection. The feel is very comfortable for those of us who spend a lot of time on blogs. I was inspired by your honesty and enthusiasm for your revelations.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
I find the subject of young romance inspirational and intriguing. There is so much passion and drama that is unleashed on the world, especially the immediate world around teenaged boys and girls. It is fun to remember those years of attraction and being attractive. I appreciate your cluing in the boy world what girls mean by “being friends,” Not that we weren’t clued in. We just didn’t want to accept the reality of the clues.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENT
 
This was an inspirational moment for me:

“"Speaking of my real crush, Daniel, I was certain that he would ask me to formal. I was absolutely heartbroken when he told me about how excited he was to ask out a girl named Alexandra. A girl who could cut half her face off with a knife and still be gorgeous. I made a poster with him, and as he told me about how nervous he was, I wished more than anything in the world that he'd one day feel the same about me.”

 
Facing reality and accepting it, are some of the most heroic things we can do as people stirred by romantic feelings for others. It takes a tremendous amount of courage and grace to put oneself in the lives of others. Your words inspire the heart and soul of your reader to follow by your own example.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your writing immensely and I believe your posting to be complete in every way.


*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRATION
 
You brought to life the exhilarating and terrifying moments of living in the teen years with so much romantic power I was able to revisit my own teen years. You have a gift for making the difficulties of relationship seem exciting and life giving. Thank you. Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of six Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell


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187
187
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi  TM , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome to our wonderful writing community.

I chose to read your poignant story  "Is a Dream Just a Dream"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your piece and it was a pleasure to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
The prophetic dream comes to a delightful little girl who is motivated by fear and wonder about the safety of passenger ships and wants answers so that she can put aside those fears. It is ironic and touching that her confidence in the ship they are to sail on is restored by her mother and her father, the man who helped engineer the ship.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRED
 
Part historical, part fiction this imaginative story explores, with more charm than despair, the possibility of a forewarning that went out as an alarm to some who may have sailed on the Titanic.  

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENT
 
This was an inspirational moment for me:

“"Well if daddy worked on it I know it's safe because he is the smartest engineer in the world."”

 
At the core of our horrifying dreams, it is amazing how having someone to put our love, faith and trust in, inspires peace and tranquility. As she said the words I almost believed the dream was about some other ill fated vessel.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I enjoyed your writing immensely and I believe your story to be complete in every way.


*Coffeer**Coffeer* INSPIRATION
 
Sometimes, even with foreknowledge that a situation, as in this sea voyage, is going to be disastrous, one still can hope and find joy in the untarnished faith of a child. I appreciate the perspective you used to give a fresh insight into an unfortunate tragedy. Thank you. Write on! *Smile*
 

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 

GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Winner of six Quills!
#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell


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188
Review of Arrival of Spring  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi  thedawaring , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your delightful article  "Arrival of Spring"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your piece and it was a delight to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
First of all, thank you for sharing your reverent view of your homeland. In your words I receive and believe how special your land and people are to you and your expression of these feelings was refreshing and wonderfully uplifting. Your view of a coming spring in a lush, green mountainous region of Bhutan is breath taking and a sweet reward to the reader’s soul.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
Using the coming of spring as a trigger to remember “Golden-Old-Times” was nicely done. You put the emphasis on how spring has always affected you and the season holds particular magic as you relate it to your present desires to immerse yourself in spring and write about this personal immersion process.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The article is written in narrative form with several paragraphs devoted to the present world around the writer. Naturally by the middle of the third paragraph the observation of the present beauty leads the writer on a journey of the mind to reflect on how today’s beauty is an extension of all the past “Golden Days.”
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENTS
 
“The Arrival of Spring” was a delightful and lyrically rich article that I thoroughly enjoyed. These were a couple of my favorite moments:

“After a dry & dusty winter, signs of the coming of spring can be seen everywhere. From fresh pale green innocent buds on withered willow trees to tender grasses sprouting by the roadsides,…”

 
I love the contrast between old and new in these lines. There is the coming and it seems to override that which was lifeless just a short time ago.
 
As the morning sun tries hard to shine through gentle clouds hovering amidst bluish-grey sky and as the cloud gradually clears away, a magnificent view of Lord Buddha statue appears from above the hills of Kuensel Phodrang.
 
I can easily visualize this harmonious sight. It is so alive with color and soft movement.
 
Light pink peach blossoms on the peach trees exude perfumes of tranquility near the open window. A score of bees busy themselves with their spring ritual of sucking nectar from every possible flower. An almost fading rainbow connects two sides of Thimphu valley! White water birds swim merrily on the swift flowing river Wangchu.

 
Woven together in this compelling scene is sweet tranquility with the busyness that spring inspires in all of nature. The fading rainbow is a subtle touch reminding the reader of the rains that had recently passed through the valley to refresh the newborn life.

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

My only suggestion is that there appears to be a few odd characters joined together in the piece that may have occurred when cutting your work into your "static item" form from a word processor. They will need to be re-written in the static item form itself to correct how the words appear when they are saved for viewing on Writing.com.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
The edits that I suggested in the previous section are: (1) “Spring is always a beautiful time of the year to get poetic and for many people;   itâs  (it’s or it is)   also the perfect time to get romantic.
(2)”… sipping a cup of hot water, trying to read Paulo  Coelhoâs âLike the Flowing Riverâ,   (Coello’s Like the Flowing River)   memories of past springs flood my mind.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
Your words in “Arrival of Spring” paint a beautiful picture so vivid and clear it is as though I am seeing it all through your eyes. The moment is intricately captured as though photographed and displayed on a panoramic screen or recreated into a mural, except that your words infuse a wonder and awe for this place and moment that no photograph could convey. You have brilliantly given your reader in your piece your heart and soul. Awesome! Write on! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
189
189
Review of Strings  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi  Roth Ceriphs , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your musical poem  "Strings"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your poem and it was a delight to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate an d disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
This love story is written to music - the harmony, dynamics and melody are controlled by a lover who knows the power of her musicianship as she takes control of the relationship. The passions may rise and the closeness may endure, but the tune is played by the woman who remains as distant in the poem as the horizon, until her nail plucks the specific string that escalates the excitement in the relationship until all that matters is her.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
"Strings" is a lyrical story about a love conceived by a woman who knows how to play the man. The metaphor of music composition and improvisation is used to express a man’s yielding to the magic played by his lover.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is written in free verse and finds a wonderful rhythm that keeps a gentle movement throughout the piece.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer* MY FAVORITE MOMENT
 
This was the part that touched me the most:

… From the time the sun peaks
Over the edge of horizon,
To the last drop of sunlight to touch her hands
She plays.
 
I liked the unique way of explaining time. Your words in this stanza make the day seem longer and fuller, dramatically showing how tied the man is to the woman.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 
My only suggestion would be to add more “how” in the first few verses. Where does her power come from – body, soul, mind? All of these? A unique combination? Is it her beauty? Her mystery? Promises? Some motivation for the man to yield, as he is being played, would clarify the relationship enough to make me feel more a part of the drama that is happening in your poem.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
Other than the suggestions in the previous section I was not aware of any other need for revision.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
In the poem “Strings,” a woman plays the inner workings of a man to the point where he yields to her musicianship. At the point where she plucks a well-chosen string with her nail, the music becomes just a whir of white noise until he at last is fully in her control. Nicely done. Thank you for sharing your gift! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
190
190
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi  gaudil0cks , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your wonderful poem  "In the Company of Great Men"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your poem and it was a delight to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
What a magnificent brilliant thought – great men – here in my library. And of course they are here for all time and I meet them frequently when there is time to socialize with them and hear the great tales. I enjoyed the blissful notion of filling my late night, wide awake hours, with a library of truly great men. Though they were unnamed – I know who they are. They are amazing poets and writers whose gift to the world blazes on.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
Your poem’s theme, spending time with authors and poets, is a joyful one. If one could find pastoral comfort indoors, this would be the place to find it. The streams and skies and meadows would be in the words of those who wrote these wonders down, so that we can explore these lovely places even in the darkness of a cold night.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is written in free verse with five line stanzas except for the last one. Each line has a marvelous lyrical quality that lifted my spirit with each reading, adding to the joy I experienced while reading your piece.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer*  FAVORITE MOMENTS
 
The whole poem was a delight and expressed with great clarity your premise and theme, but these were a couple of my favorite moments:

I sit here alone,
In the company of great men.

 
I love the way these two lines feel. The lines flow easily and one can almost miss the irony in the notion of being alone – except around us are great men. Am I really alone in a library? Perhaps not, and maybe that’s why it’s such a comforting place.
 
Entertained by my friends
Until drooping eyes
Force me to say goodbye.
 
This image is one that is easy to relate to. And while it is not an uncommon image, it speaks of the magic of being with brilliant friends, where it is not rude to suddenly drop of into a scrumptious sleep - in fact it is expected – and maybe it is the greatest complement to give our ancient friends.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

I was extremely taken with your poem and it seems perfect in every way to me.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I wasn’t aware of any need for edits or revisions.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
Should I ever want for inspiration, all I need is a late night, with no hope of sleep and a keen library where I may be entertained by the greatest writers and poets of all time. Your poem is a lyrical reminder of where I may visit and rekindle old friendships and the place is never far away. Beautiful! Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
191
191
Review of Embrace Yourself  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi  Brittany James , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your wonderful poem  "Embrace Yourself"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your poem and it was a delight to read it several times in prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your words inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
You have crafted a wonderful message in a beautiful way. Your tone and rhythm in the words are refreshing and encouraging and I received a positive glow as I read each line.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
Your poem’s theme is timeless and uplifting. Perhaps it may be hard to do for some people who suffer from the harsh treatment that can happen in the world, but it is not inconceivable that your poem's message of hope and positive inspiration in each line will cause even the most down and out soul to be lifted up to follow your counsel.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is completed in twelve lines with several rhymes that enhance the flow of the thought without disturbing the rhythm of the piece. The lines work together with a poetic determination to convey your power-filled message.
 

*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer* A FAVORITE MOMENT
 
The whole poem was great in its delightful expression and its firm admonition, but this was the best part for me:

The future is everlasting
The past- filled with our annotations
As the present is being penciled in.
.

You sum up in a few words why we must embrace ourselves and make a stand. I love the contrast between what has been annotated in my life and what is only “penciled in”. Certainly clear enough reason to get off my duff.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

My only suggestion would be that I believe you have lots of room in your poem for a bit more detail and solid imaging. Perhaps a modifier before “dreams”. The line, “Because you have so much more to offer” to me seems to want more specifics. I think the poem could benefit from a few characteristics that declare how one is an an offering to the world – our love, grace, mercy, joy – etc. I feel that some specifics would help to make the poem a bit more personal.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
Other than what I mentioned in the previous section I wasn’t aware of any need for edits or revisions.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
The exhortation in your poem stirs something in my soul to respond in a positive way. I am moved to take a look at how I have come to live my life. Am I standing or am I sitting? And above all, am I being all that God has called me to be? Well done. Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
192
192
Review of Daydreams  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi  FiFi , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your wonderful essay  "Daydreams"  from within the Read A Newbie Forum of WdC. I enjoyed reading your essay and it was a delight to read it again to prep for my review.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your essay inspired. While I may suggest some minor alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and reactions to your words in the hope that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Daydream? I say yes. You convinced me…or at least affirmed me, or that is, affirmed one of my sweetest habits. Thank you. Where would we be as writers if we didn’t have that scrumptious place to go to when life becomes tedious or stubbornly idle. I not only appreciated the theme and vision cast by your article but was particularly drawn in by the high caliber of your writing. Every thought and example was cohesive and deliberate and if I had not been a confirmed daydreamer, I would have, upon reading your piece, immediately signed up to join that fantastic community.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* THEME
 
The theme of finding an exquisite get-away-place in the mind was yummy. I admit to being a daydreamer, but I had not ever sat down to defend my position on the subject. I believe your essay is groundbreaking in that it stakes out for the reader all of the benefits for letting the mind take an occasional, well deserved vacation. Trading in my “ancient-of-agedness” for the youth that still occurs in my mind, is a delightful idea. I honestly felt younger just reading your thoughts on this subject.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The essay is six paragraphs long with a strong premise statement in the beginning and an excellent concluding statement in the last paragraph. The examples of how your own personal daydreams have brought you peace and tranquility were refreshing and lyrical.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer**Coffeer* BEST MOMENTS
 
The whole essay was great in its expressiveness and light-hearted feel, but these are a few of the best moments for me:

I often find myself daydreaming. Just drifting off thinking about something else. Somewhere else.

These three simple sentences set the stage for my own mind to take its journey.

Nature plays an important part in my real life and my daydreams. So thoughts of rolling hills, winding paths, green lush forests full of life feature a lot. What animals lurk in the hedge? Where does that path go?

These thoughts resonated with what is the essence of so many of my own daydreams, growing up on the farm as I did. Every trail, path and road had to be explored, but farming didn’t leave much time to physically get out of the fields and up into the rolling hills.
 
Time stolen from the humdrum time of day, to allow yourself just that moment to feel young and free of adult complexities and duties. Free from the shackles of work and able to explore places that don't exist anywhere other than in your imagination,...

Thank you for this inspiring thought and giving this amazing encouragement.
 
*Coffeer**Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 

The images and reasoning in your piece were illuminating and a joy to read. Other than a few minor edits which I will mention in the next section , I felt your piece was well written and complete in every way.

*Coffeer**Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
  The words in green below are some minor edits I would suggest:

Other times they are full scale, multicolourmulti-colour ideas,…

Can you honestly contemplate not having the imagination to allow these ideas to creep in and take over …

Imagination. Its,it’s free. Its,it’s yours.

… soon you will be grabbing it, holding it tight adand letting it take you to wherever you want …

*Coffeer**Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
I feel rejuvenated just reading the words of your essay and applying with vigor the suggestions made in your piece. Not only was the writing beautifully done, but the subject matter was treated with a lot of in-depth feeling and inspiration. Well done. Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
 
Two Paper Dolls with Blue Background


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
193
193
Review of NEW FOLDER  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
Hi  Mary Ann MCPhedran , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read and review "NEW FOLDER"   as you requested. I appreciate the opportunity to work with your collection of poems.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your poems inspired. While I may suggest some structural alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and impressions in the hopes that they may help and encourage. Because you requested my input on your project I feel it appropriate to give some direction that goes a bit beyond the typical review. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
As a collection of poems, Buttercups and Daisies has a wide range of images, thoughts and wisdom that obviously mirror the beauty of your poetic heart. Most of the poems are short with randomly chosen patterns of rhyme, meter, rhythm and tone. Where most of the poems offer reflections on nature, self and relationships, there are quite a few offerings that explore holiday and precious memory themes as well.
 
*Coffeer* THEME
 
The poems that address the actual force and beauty of nature are graceful and in most cases complete. The most heartfelt poems, and no surprise here, seem to express most completely your passion for life and appear to press towards some revelation of how a full and contented life is best lived. Those poems that contain focus on memories are softly reflective and present in a way the shadows of where life was at one time and where it is today. Each of the holiday poems stand confidently on their own and are obviously deeply personal to you.
 

*Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The collection is laid out in seemingly no particular order. Perhaps they are chronological from the day they were conceived and are numbered 5 through 78.(79). Most are titled and those that are not vary from the others only in the sense that the first line of each of them could just have easily been the title of the poem. You use a mixture of rhyme, almost rhyme and no rhyme in most of your poems and the rhythm and tone of each one seems to be based more on how the images need to be portrayed and felt rather than a strict adherence to poetic form and structure.
 
*Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 
I believe you have laid excellent ground work for developing a wonderful collection of poems. My first suggestion would be to break the work up into sub groups. If you want the collection to stay intact I would collect all those about nature into one section and relationship into another. Of course all the other themes such as holiday and self –awareness should have their own sub section as well.

In the collection you had some duplications: 51, 33 & 41; 59 and 49; 62 and 65; 75 and 63; 76 and 71. Also the title “Christmas” was used twice, but on separate poems.

As far as the issue of how Writing.com handles text cut and pasted from other word processing systems, for the sake of readability, you should manually adjust the rows to eliminate all hard carriage returns (those word processing internal marks) that create so much white space. Also, for the sake of those who may want to comment on your work, I would suggest publishing some of your poems by themselves in their own individual static item. Reader/reviewers on WDC love to review poetry, but often shy away from large compilations.

*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION

There were a couple of edits I would recommend: (a) In number 6, the last line, "Gods" should be written in the possessive form “God’s creation glows”. (b)In number 10, fourth line – “alter” should be “altar”. (c) In number 19 replace “stop” with “stops.” (d) In number 23 replace “summers gone” with “summer’s gone” or “summer is gone.” (e) In number 55 in the title change “Help Me Bare…” with “Help Me Bear…”


*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
Your poems convey a great expanse of experience with life and an appreciation for the diversity that life offers in nature and relationships and time spent with no one but one's self, but your strongest writing occurs in the prose section in number 22. I was absolutely stunned by the words and pastoral vision of a day ending with a glorious watch on a serene body of water. Your approach and narrative to this moment in your life was compelling reading and the experience you shared is vividly etched on my soul. Well done. Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
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Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with The Rockin' Reviewers  
Rated: E | (4.0)
** Image ID #1739575 Unavailable **
Hi  VergilZard , 
 
I am ♫~ Kenword~♫ , a fellow author on Writing.com (WdC), and I am glad that you have joined the writing.com community. Welcome.

I chose to read your account of the battle between Vergil and Nina in the  "Pokemon BV - Vergil Vs Nina"  from within the “Read A Newbie Forum” of WdC.
 
My review is based solely on impressions and feelings your story inspired. While I may suggest some structural alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and impressions in the hopes that they may help and encourage. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
All the gifts for assault and defense are put into play in this deftly created account of Vergil and Nina’s Pokemon battle. Through the maneuvers executed by the combatants, even one who has no knowledge of the guiding principles of Pokemon can enjoy the chronicles created to lionize this epic contest.
 
*Coffeer* THEME
 
The inner workings of the game Pokemon are used to create a history of one battle. It is a battle to be remembered as many of the offensive and defensive weapons are employed giving even an outsider some knowledge of how the game is played.
 

*Coffeer* STRUCTURE
 
The story is told from the third person point of view, with the dialogue of Vergil and Nina capturing the commands to their forces and recording their reactions to each of the moves made on the field of battle.
 
There is rich texture added to the narrative as the descriptions of the attack on Charizard and Mawile are exceptionally well written, bringing to life the combatants in a memorable way.
 
*Coffeer*SUGGESTIONS
 
I think the only thing I would suggest to add to the beauty of what you have created would be to add some description of the characters involved. Through the contest, it becomes evident what powers each combatant has, but for those who are not familiar with the game, some more detail of the arena, Charizard and Mawile would help heighten the enjoyment of the read.
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION

I was not aware of any need for revision or editing.


*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
As the battle winds down and silence takes over the arena of battle, Nina and Vergil chat about the outcome of the game. I appreciated the tone and the excellent writing in this narrative as it show cased the wholly non-fictional human element that is alive in the arena for those who adore the challenge of Pokemon. Well done. Keep up the good work! *Smile*
 
I hope my thoughts and impressions have been a help. Let me know if you have any questions about my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
 
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Review of Remember When  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Click here to join the WdC Power Reviewers Group!

*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*



Hello BillieGail memory of Cheyenne , 
 
I selected  "Remember When"  from your portfolio to read and review as my way of saying, “Congratulations On Your 1 Year Anniversary On Writing.com.” I enjoyed reading your work and am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings about your poem.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how the poem made me feel and what images made lasting impressions. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
“Remember When” begins by questioning one’s love, and maybe one’s own heart and soul. If they recall the first moment when the whole world changed, what will be remembered from that perfect moment? I hear the questions softly spoken. Beyond wanting to know, the inquiry sets up a path on which to walk with wonder to a time and place far away now, but yet as near as a gentle kiss and a warm embrace. Your poem explores love with profound insight into where the new world begins and how it is reflected now in one’s present feelings about that moment.
 
*Coffeer* THEME
 
I felt the theme of your poem is how wonderful it is to have precious moments to recall. They are moments that renew old passions and desires, and give me comfort in times of joy and sorrow. The moment remembered is about me, perhaps, but because I was in love and drawn into love by so sweet a kiss and so electrifying a touch, I know it is more about the one I love, than about me. What a joy it is to remember that moment. How wonderful that the memories will always produce these feelings and emotions. They will always be mine.
 
*Coffeer* Best Moments
 
These are some of the images that were particularly pleasing to me:

Remember when we first looked deep into each other’s eyes?
Remember our first touch?
 
I remember…
I felt free for the first time in my entire life
I felt safe…
 
For the first time I felt complete.
Every first minute of every day that I spend with you
I feel those same first feelings
 
  *Giftp*  Every moment we spend in the presence of the one we love is precious. The questions make an innocent inquiry. What do we know of the first moment together? Is it the same day to day, or is it enhanced by the endless days that make the memories more treasured. I’m not pulling from a dry dusty file to recall the tender moments of love. I am taking them in to cherish and to take comfort from them every day.

*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
I could not think of any ways to improve what you have created. It is quite amazing the way it is.
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I did not feel there was any need for edits or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
“Remember When” is a joy to read because it does provoke me to look closer at a moment in time that I may have disregarded. Life does have a way after all, of encroaching on my cherished memories with a lot unimportant, distracting stuff. I don’t ask my soul enough to think about the precious times in my life. Fortunately, my friend, my love, will ask and will share and there is so much delight in reliving that first moment that changed our lives forever. Wonderfully done.
 
Thank you for sharing your gift and talents.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR**MugR*
 
 
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#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell



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196
196
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable **  
Hello Just an Ordinary Boo! , 
 
This review of  "A Moment Out of Time"   is a gift presented to you by Andy~hating university in your ** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable ** . I enjoyed reading your poem and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your piece inspired.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how your poem made me feel and the images that made a lasting impression on me. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
A lovely encounter with a perfect stranger becomes a moment when a daughter remembers her mother so vividly, that it was as if her mother had actually returned. There is beauty in this moment as loneliness is set aside for at time and a new calm and peace is experienced by both women.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* THEME
 
A woman enjoys an encounter with an older woman who is so much like her mom that the moments spent together give her a new peace. A pleasant calm. The poem explores the beauty of a moment spent in the company of one who can impart the pleasures she once enjoyed with her mother. For the older lady too, the moment becomes one to be cherished with a warm heart.
 

*Coffeer**Lightning* STRUCTURE
 
“A Moment Out of Time” is written in free verse with an easy flow from line to line. The incidental rhymes like “hair” with “wear’, “smile” with “while” and “hug” with “shrug” add to the interest as the images and words build to a beautiful conclusion.


*Coffeer**Lightning* BEST MOMENTS
 
All of your words and images brought inspiration to my heart and soul and this moment was particularly striking to me:

She was shuffling along,
with her walker and then she turned
and I could swear
my Mother had returned.
 
In this moment, what the woman remembers of her mom is sad and yet I feel the images convey a powerful yearning. It is for this moment that the two women have each other, but only by coincidence. Because one’s yearnings were so very strong perhaps.
 

*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
I love your poem just the way you have created it.
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I was not aware of any need for edits or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
With antique white hair, a walker and a shuffling step, an older woman becomes an important part of a younger woman’s life. They share a moment. It is out of time because for the young woman, it seems as though this lady is so very much like her mom. So much so in fact that she receives comfort and peace while at the same time giving away her daughter-devotion to a woman who too has a need for love and recognition. Love, life, acceptance and belonging are all central in this wonderful poem. Nicely done.
 
Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR**MugR*
 
 
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#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell



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197
197
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Image ID #1729366 Unavailable **  
Hello Just an Ordinary Boo! , 
 
This review of  "Waiting by the seashore"   is a gift presented to you by ~ Aqua ~ in your ** Image ID #1729366 Unavailable ** . I enjoyed reading your poem and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your piece inspired.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how your poem made me feel and the images that made a lasting impression on me. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
A wait by the seashore awakens in one the remembrance of a love that has been lost. The drama that is perceived is because of the waves that come and go in the life of the seashore and the rocks. What motivates the waves to rise and recede is the pull of the moon, but the lonely pebbles and rocks do not know that there is a force that takes away the companionship that has been blissfully enjoyed, hour after hour.
 
The winds shift, comfort is forfeited and the soft caress and sweet kiss are now gone. But unlike the one who waits hopelessly for a love to return, the moon will relent, the tides will reverse and the rocks and sand and pebbles will be reunited with their mate.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* THEME
 
The natural wonder of the sea with its every shifting mood becomes the focal point of one who identifies with the rocks, left behind by their most precious companion, the waves. Through the images of the seashore, the moon and the waves, the love affair is revealed. The hope for the observer is that she was the rock, he was the wave. But will the man and woman be as easily re-united as the seashore with the waves?
 

*Coffeer**Lightning* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is written in free verse with images that are natural for the seashore but suggest a strong tie to human love. In the first verse the foam created by the waves are like fingers. They stroke. The pebbles are like a smooth cheek. The fingers linger on the cheek with a caress. There is laughter and a kiss. But then there seems to be another affection. The reason for sudden separation is below the surface, and the pain of that separation dries out the sun bleached soul.
 
The voice and tone of the poem are gentle and the rhythm of the words enhance my feelings of having experienced this separation myself. I am able to appreciate how human the landscape becomes as it touches the places in my soul still remembering the times I have been abandoned.

*Coffeer**Lightning* BEST MOMENTS
 
All of your words and images are vivid and beautiful and these are some lines that are particularly memorable.

Foamy fingers of brine
stroke the smooth cheeked pebbles,
and gurgle with laughter ne tower falling…
 
What can I say, this is a stunning opening to your poem.
 
White capped waves gambol,
amongst the rocks that relax
in their cool caress.
 
I had to look up the word “Gambol.” Thank you. It is the perfect word to describe what is happening in this scene.
 
Alone stand the rocks
once more bereft of companionship,
with naught but memories
as protection ‘gainst the jeering sun. 

This is an incredible verse that reveals the depths of pain in the woman’s soul. She declares she is the rock in the last verse. Like her, I have found memories to be a last protection from what each new day’s sun can bring.
 

*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
I have no revisions to suggest. The seashore scene is beautifully portrayed as a place of refuge and sanctuary from the loneliness of being abandoned. The elements can't help but speak of the very thing that has caused so much pain. Your insights and poetic expression are perfect in every way.
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I was not aware of any need for edits or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
Should I wander the seashore again sometime I will no doubt experience the waves with a new vision. I was thoroughly absorbed by the images and beauty of your poem. The words drew me to place in my soul that still needs healing and I found solace in the metaphor you used. Thank you.
 
Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR**MugR*
 
 
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#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell



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198
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Review of Coffee Infusion  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable **
 
Hello fyn , 
 
This review of  "Coffee Infusion"   is a gift presented to you by Andy~hating university in your ** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable ** . I enjoyed reading your poem and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your piece inspired.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how your story made me feel and the images that made a lasting impression on me. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Ahhhhh…I too am re-java-nated. What happens when the pot of “ink” that should fill the writer with inspiration and a delight in the new day is empty? Well not quite empty. It’s the last of yesterday’s brew and it is a dreadful sludge that not only does not inspire prose, but provokes enough outrage that one decides to brave the elements in search of a fresh infusion of hope and light.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* THEME
 
Everyday a challenge is presented to the writer and the writer becomes the steam, the pungent aroma and even the beans. Every element in the caffeinated elixir becomes a part of a ritual, a drama, a road to creativity and words…endless, precious words.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* STRUCTURE
 
The poem is masterful prose written in free verse. The words pour forth from image to image with a nice easy flow that keeps the reading experience bright. Energized.
 
The first verse sets up the intensity of the writer’s need. It is obvious there is a fixation and an obsession that equates the unmentioned coffee as the ink essential to the writer’s craft. The second verse captures the essence of acquiring the “fix”. There is a mix of drama and satire as writer meets purveyor and the blood of the one who holds her own cup, rises in pressure and gait within the restrictive vessels.
 
In the third verse comes the satisfaction. Blessed, blissful satisfaction. Now the words can flow with ease.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* BEST MOMENTS
 
Your words were a delight to read, and each image was a gem. These are a few lines that I found wonderfully memorable.

She eyes the sludge in pot bottom--
cold battery acid reminder of yesterday's brew, forgotten
in the storm of frenzied words.

I love how the ink is the problem, and yet is the resolution at the same time.
 
...dodging through umbrella'd flowers,
hopping puddles glazed in rainbows.
 
Amazing how vivid this image becomes the more I think about it.
 
Just down to the corner where the scent of roasted beans
teases, where the fire dances within the blackened hearth,
and where the elixir of life is served by many names.
 
Infused into the many senses of the writer are the great elements of life that surround that critical first cup of coffee. I enjoyed the journey immensely. Okay. Yes, because I totally relate. I’ve not used the coffee cup as a part of my review tag line on WdC just because its all that spiffy. (I do like that it is red.)
 
*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
The style, grace tone and feel of your poem, for me is perfect in every way. Thank you. Well done!
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I was not aware of any need for edit or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
For the writer who knows the pure satisfaction of the first cup of coffee at the beginning of the day, we know too that it is our ink. The link between ink and coffee is funny but for some of us, all too true. Thanks for being the one to write it so eloquently and beautifully.
 
Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR**MugR*
 
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#1300305 by Maryann - House Martell



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199
199
Review of April's Tears  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Yellow Rose , 
 
This review of  "April's Tears"  is a gift presented to you by Mandy in a ** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable ** . I enjoyed reading your poem and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your piece inspired.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how your story made me feel and the images that made a lasting impression on me. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
Children are drawn to an image in a stone and see in it the majesty of love and hope and joy that can only come from God and His promises. The poem dances with the power of vivid images and precious rhymes and my soul is stirred to visit the deeper elements of this dynamically crafted piece.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* THEME
 
The theme of April’s Tears, for me, is that God shows His presence and His love continually. In order to see and appreciate the wonder of His divine communications I must be like a child. I must be drawn to Him, even as I was as a child drawn to the wonder of my earthly father. God the Father may choose to convey His message through His word, my friends (and enemies), nature, or His still smaill voice, but my childlike faith must be ready to receive His communication.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* STRUCTURE
 
The poem has a pattern of two line stanzas, each one rhyming. The format of the poem is lovely to read aloud and the syllables in each line have an easy flow giving the reader comfort and ease with each recitation.
 

*Coffeer**Lightning* BEST MOMENTS
 
Each line of your inspired poem gave me great pleasure and these are a few that remain quite memorable:

A small white spot appeared emitting a sunny beam
All were very puzzled and wondered about the gleam


My curiosity is piqued.

“I don’t see a Bird April, what Bird do you see?"
“It’s trapped in the rock Mommy, set it free for me.”

What April sees, stirs in her a determination to act. She is moved to compassion by what she sees and is not concerned with reasons or explanations for why the bird is in the rock, but is compelled by compassion to set it free.

One of the older children took April by the hand
He told her the grownups no longer understand

They are too busy and forget to the hear the Word
They’ve turned their backs on the glory of the Bird

Children, who remain children, know about those who no longer see, no longer believe. The grace and mercy that comes from heaven is to be childlike forever, for in remaining like little children is the Kingdom of Heaven

*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
I appreciate your poem's, style tone and grace. The message is clear and hopeful and has the power of a finely crafted parable. I believe it is perfet in every way.
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I was not aware of any need for edit or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
A dove appears in a rock in the garden, that only the children see. April is moved with compassion to seek the bird’s freedom and is broken when those who could possibly help cannot see. “April’s Tears”, beautiful in so many ways is also a challenge for the reader to regain the wonder of being free from the limitations of being an adult and once again become little children.
 
Thank you for sharing this wonderful poem.
 
Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR**MugR*
 
 
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200
200
Review of Daybreak  
Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello Just an Ordinary Boo! , 
 
This review of  "Daybreak"  is a gift presented to you by PatrickB in a ** Image ID #1729365 Unavailable ** . I enjoyed reading your poem and I am delighted to share with you some of my thoughts and feelings your piece inspired.
 
My review is based on the images and feelings your words inspired during my various readings. While I may select some areas of your work that I feel could benefit from some rewriting, I prefer to focus on how your story made me feel and the images that made a lasting impression on me. Please take what you think is appropriate and disregard the rest.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* FIRST IMPRESSION
 
What is immediately striking to me in your poem is the wealth of color, motion and passion you have used. I am struck hard by the vivid colors. Pearly pink, gold, hot yellows of the sun, cool white of the moon are colors that stir in me the love I have for vibrant contrasts - just as the silver silken strands contrast with the glowing red of hot embers.
 
The coming dawn ushers me down a path to see the sun saw off the dark of night and then, unexpectedly the sun “rampages”. The wind whispers, the sun sinks, boughs sway and my insides move with these images of motion.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* THEME
 
How the sun dazzled days of summer sparkle then tear across the lives of those who long for the glorious beauty and searing heat. The night resists the coming of the day, but nothing created can hold back the rising sun's determination. In an Apache Dance, day and night twirl around each other, their colors flashing, their emotions piqued. Oh what it is to live in the dance.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* STRUCTURE
 
"Daybreak" is written in the Monotetra form. Each line is in perfect tetrameter and each stanza has four lines with its own unique rhyme. The scheme is followed perfectly in this poem and all of the rhymes are natural and unforced.
 
Unique to this form was the convention of repeating the first four syllables in the last line of each stanza. This too was done flawlessly and added drama to the five individual scenes.
 
*Coffeer**Lightning* BEST MOMENTS
 
Each line of your exquisite poem was a gem and these are a few that are quite memorable:

Pearly pink pale promise of dawn
Golden gleam the darkness has sawn

Sun rampages across the skies
Valiant dew succumbs and dies

Now benign warmth, a dwindling pyre.
Embers of fire. Embers of fire.

The colors and vivid images contrast with the action portrayed in each line and stanza.
I am moved and entranced at the same time.

*Coffeer* SUGGESTIONS
 
I love the pace and style of your poem. The rhythm and rhyme is created flawlessly so that as I repeat the words it is as though I am singing a familiar song, lofty and fine and yet blessed and fair. I felt your poem is perfect in every way. Well done!
 
*Coffeer* EDIT/REVISION
 
I was not aware of any need for edit or revision.
 
*Coffeer* IN SUMMARY
 
In “Daybreak,” the night and its fair personality are subdued by the day. It is as conquered as if it were the foe the sun's mortal enemy. This powerful poem paints a fresh view of something I daily take for granted. A sunrise, a day of warmth and beauty. A delight.
 
Please let me know if you have any questions regarding my review.
 
Kind Regards,

~Kenword~ *MugR*
 
 
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