This is a very heart-touching and realistic account of the serious illness of the author's wife. There are no mistakes.
I particularly liked one sentence--"She is the only person who could put up with me for all these years." Many husbands could probably share that feeling!
My rather similar, but terminal, experience is described in "Invalid Item" .
Here is a poem in the praise of the Lord which could as well pass off as a children's rhyme. In other words, this is a poem for all ages. Its simplicity is its uniqueness. Keep writing!
This is a nice story about three soldiers injured in war. Two succumbed but one got out of it. He, and the other two, experienced a glimpse of the "Life after Death". It immediately reminds the reader of Raymond Moody, M.D., Ph.D., bestselling author of Life After Life.
You have achieved a difficult task admirably well. There are n mistakes.
This is unique because the topic is rare.
It is labelled as poetry but prose cannot become poetry simply b labelling it so.
The description of the childbirth from the point of view who is being born is unparalleled.
NOTE:
the voice showed me what I had to look forward too.
>>> forward to.
The author of this article has chosen an unusual topic and hs done his research well. Then he poses the following question--
How do you reason with such fanatics?
00000
i)-The basic question is --Who are the fanatics?
The fact is that fanatics are those (the believers) who fanatically believe that theirs is the only true faith and that those who are non-believers must be converted to their own belief or be killed.
Such fanatics usually award death sentence for the so-called blasphemy.
ii)--Christianity has taken a step forward and has got out of the concept of blasphemy. It has yet to get out of the aim of achieving 100% conversion of "Non-believers" into "believers".
iii)--The answer to this question (How do you reason with such fanatics?)is this:
>>> Let us lead by example. Let the Pope declare that 100% conversion is not the goal. The day that is done, Islam will lose its steam about / against Kafirs (non-believers).
This poem is written in the praise of the Lord in a manner as a child learns the counting /steps. God is receptive to whatever supplication comes to him from a pure heart.
Thank you, Lord, for friends and foe
Thank you, Lord, for always opening doors
It is a nice poem about loneliness. The message, as I see, is that one maybe happy in one's loneliness, but one is not allowed to remain aloof from the world. The world covers him all over because it cannot tolerate loneliness.
To me, the following lines were crucial in this poem:
"He was alone, and
He wanted nothing more.
The world could not allow such luxury.
It flung a barrage of temptations and barbs.
In the end he was forced to surrender himself.
He entered the ranks of involvement.
The world was victorious once again.
As nature abhors a vacuum.
So the world abhors aloneness."
This is a nice story. You have an engaging style. There are few mistakes of language and grammar. The theme is interesting and unique.
Your descriptions are interesting, such as--
"Currently Esther was enjoying his full attention. Yet another of reminder of a lady love. This one an art student with an exotic grace. She fascinated him and she dealt with him directly. Letting him know there was no place in her life for him. She left as quickly as she had come. Esther was a comforting presence even though her name was a result of scorned love. She knew how valued she was and used it to her every advantage."
It is a nice little story poem about magic beans that a child traded for a cow he wanted to sell.Everybody likes to read stories, including myself, now 80!
You have written well without mistakes,
EXCEPT
Ref: That’s like buying sight unseen!”
>>> I think you meant "site"
To me, it appears that the poem needs to be re-looked by the writer. The main thing in a poem is that it must flow smoothly. The flow is definitely hampered when line lengths are too long and variable.
The flow would look better if we change as follows:
******
How could reality be so bare,
to where we as beings feel the need to be aware
About the if's and not's within a realm,
to the parallel stars that form Hercules and the Triangulum
What if we as earth's beings drew the wrong conclusion,
which hinted everything was merely an illusion
From the oxygen we breathe which is said to be in the air,
to the gravity we can't see but yet we claim it's there
Is it possible that we are actually just shapes and sizes,
and color itself is one in many of life's disguises
For this life we seem to have created is a paradox haven,
unless life itself allowed such a transformation to rapidly happen
From the belief in a creator, to the technology we invent,
soon you'll begin to realize that we as human's are the ultimate purpose of life to an extent.
[NOTE--Trying to minimise the variation in line length in the above would certainly help.]
The thoughts in this poem are easily understood. What is not so easily understood is the structure of the poem. A poem must have flow when one recites it aloud. This becomes difficult when line length varies too much as is the case here.
losing my faith in it's wisdom >>> losing my faith in its wisdom.
This is a nice limerick with proper rhyme scheme (AABBA) and reasonably proper syllabic counts:
"The standard form of a limerick is a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth rhyming with one another and having three feet of three syllables each; and the shorter third and fourth lines also rhyming with each other, but having only two feet of three syllables. The third and fourth lines are usually anapaestic."
Just great! This is a wonderful poem. The concept is unique. The description is vivid. There are no mistakes of spelling or grammar. You have dealt with the theme very well.
Keep writing.
This article written by a Muslim doctor, tries to say that there is no express prohibition against education of women in Islam. She says--"Please, don't blame Islam as an hindrance to higher studies anymore".
The world is concerned not with what is written in Islamic scriptures but with how Islam operates in actual practice. In the Indian state of Jammu and Kashmir, girls schools were burnt down by Islamic zealots, saying there is no need to educate girls. In Afghanistan also, there are reports that secret classes are held for girls because they can't be educated openly. These may be stray incidents but speak a lot about how Islam, particularly of the Sunni Wahabi variety, operates.
Muslim girls and women in India have to face no such prejudices in general. Primary education is free in government schools in India. However, many Muslims prefer to send their boys to Madrasas, which are basically devoted to teaching Quran. Girls in such homes are simply not given any education.
Nobody can help a society that does not want to give proper modern education to children. Improvement has to come from within the Muslim society. It cannot come as long as the following idea prevails, as in this article--"One point I must add that as a Muslim, I have to prioritize my religion above all. So Muslim community should reconstruct the education process preserving the rules of Islam.
If the Muslim societies prefer religion over education, it is their sweet will. However, such sweet will proves to be a bitter pill.
[Otherwise, the author would have no reason to write such an article, emphasising that Islam is not against education to girls, as long as "Islam is preserved". Therein lies the bane of Islamic societies. Muslim countries are Islamic kingdoms or republics. None of them is secular. Muslims in India are lucky to be living in a secular country. That is why we have had as many as four Muslim Presidents in India (Zakir Husain, Mohammad Hidayatullah, Fakhruddin Ali Ahmed and Avul Pakir Jainulabdeen Abdul Kalam).
Can a non-Muslim ever be the President of a Muslim country? No. Till then Muslims in those countries would remain deprived to a certain extent. That is bound to happen when some windows are kept closed.
It is a nice poem with a lyrical quality. It is written in honour / memory of Saith, a broken kitten who healed.
I had difficulty understanding the following:
Dearly beloved Saith, sweet Saith,
Tribe leader most special,
Each loved only you in good faith.
Your expressions facial
Molded to each, in care and play,
Only you announce Chicken Day.
Molded to each,
Molded to each.
Losing tribe felt like dying may.
This is a nice poem about the death of an old lady who died like any other person, in a non-descript way. What makes it remarkable is the simplicity of words and expression. You have done a good job chronicling the death of the old lady.
This is a nice poem about the death of an old lady who died like any other person, in a non-descript way. What makes it remarkable is the simplicity of words and expression. You have done a good job chronicling the death of the old lady.
This is a reciprocal review.
--M C Gupta
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