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Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/books/item_id/1762035-Who-Do-I-Think-I-Am/sort_by/entry_order DESC, entry_creation_time DESC/page/11
Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1762035
A little bit of everything, colored my own way.
WDC's Longest Running Blog Competition - Hiatus

BLOG CHALLENGE WINNER FOR SEPTEMBER 2011 AND APRIL 2012!!
** Image ID #1901871 Unavailable **


7/08 Just a shot of me outside.

After almost a year away, I've decided to revisit Blogville. I'm refreshed and ready...this time around it'll be a little different. I'll talk about a little bit of everything...music, sports, retail life, and more. It's not for everyone...you might not like it, but someone you know (and possibly detest) probably will!

WHO THE HELL DO I THINK I AM??

A gift from Julie D for being named Honorable Mention for Best Blog in the Quill Awards!

We're gonna find out one way or another! *Wink*
Relax, enjoy, leave a comment, tell your friends...
A special thanks to Julie D - PUBLISHED! for the 2011 Quill Awards image!

"There is only one way...it is THE WAY." -Photo Jesus
Pic sent to me awhile ago...long story behind it.
"Can't you count to one??"

My composition book image from Leger's shop, for winning the 30-Day blog challenge.

Thanks for stopping by and showing your support! *Heart*

A fair warning.

For the latest entries, please visit "Who do I still think I am??. Thanks!
Previous ... 7 8 9 10 -11- 12 13 14 15 16 ... Next
April 5, 2012 at 6:30pm
April 5, 2012 at 6:30pm
#750294
THE PROMPT: (Opinion Piece) "What are your thoughts on alternative healing practices? Defend your view."

Good evening everybody. Allow me to pause for a moment to figure out how to work a prompt regarding a subject that I know absolutely nothing about. Considering I work in a store that deals with pharmaceutical items, shouldn't I know something about this?

I know Googling this topic will probably send me in a million different spastic directions, so I'm not even gonna bother with that idea.

I have just over an hour to bang out something relevant before the puck drops...it's a crucial Sabres/Flyers game. Speaking of which, hey Julie D - PUBLISHED! , you still alive? Oh yeah, and I want to get a shower in as well before the game...dinner I can eat while watching, but if I don't stick a shower in there...ahhh, well, there's always the intermissions for that I suppose.

Ok, here we go. I don't know a damn thing about alternative healing practices. And I don't like doctors and hospitals and that kinda stuff. My advice? Don't get hurt or sick. That's the safest bet, I figure. But yeah, nobody takes my advice...you fools!! *Smirk*

Here's the deal. I believe the Pharmaceutical Industry only has their best interests in mind. Aspirins, drugs, creams and salves aren't "healers" to them. They're profit. They're in business not to heal, but to make money off it. Why the hell don't you think there's a cure for cancer yet? Because Big Pharm wants to make money off of treating it, not eradicating it. And Big Pharm's lips are in too many influential politicos' ears to give a shit about the common person. They know we'll gulp an aspirin and stick a band-aid on anything. They tell doctors what to prescribe and what not to...and it's not based on what may heal us, but what their profit margins are.

I hope this doesn't upset my pharmacy-schooled friends who've paid a lot of money and spent a lot of time learning what to give people and what not to give people and how this interacts with that, but it's just how I feel. And trust me...you guys do a lot of work and deal with a lot of different things that us normal retailers don't have to deal with, and vice-versa.

So that's my opinion. For once, you'll have tangible proof of me being wrong...see, this entry comes with a guarantee. If I'm wrong, Big Pharm will strike me down with a lightning bolt and I won't have a job or any feeling in my warm, dead body by tomorrow morning. If that's the case, it's been fun, people. See ya 'round the way.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

When a trained physician can misdiagnose a broken bone twice, this happens. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b-aoChhfHkQ

At least he could've given me a sugar pill and watched me rattle down the street.

VITAL STATS:

*Cart* As you all know, I deal in the non-pharmaceutical aspects of working in a pharmacy. As the lowest-rung member of management, sometimes I have to run the store with no other members of management present. And when a cashier calls in sick, sometimes it feels like each of your limbs is tied to a horse and they're all running in opposite directions. That was my day. When I got stuck ringing on the back-up register, I opened it up and asked for the next person in line. This old lady jumped up ahead of three other people, tossed her bag of jelly beans on the counter, and said "I only have this one thing!" I looked at her, very calmly extended my index finger, waved it back and forth once or twice, and said, again, calmly, "But you're going to cut in front of all these other customers?" She backed her truck up into her spot in the line, and I cashed out the older and more appreciative lady ahead of her, who needed the sugar we have on sale. I ran to the stockroom and got her some, and the line-cutter decided she'd play a little game with me called "Let's get nasty with the overworked management type". She asked me who the manager was and I told her I was the one on duty, which she wanted no part of. She told me that I embarrassed her in front of all these people, and that even though she was wrong, I was more wrong. While cashing out another gentleman, no less. In front of all those people. So I apologized and told her that that was not my intent. She retorted with "It's too late for an apology. You embarrassed me! You were so rude! Even though I was wrong, you're rude." So...let me update the score here...by cutting ahead in line, and me pointing out nicely that there were people ahead of her waiting, and then her thowing a temper tantrum like a two year old, I'm wrong? Methinks not. I had two other customers after that ask me what the hell was wrong with her. She asked to speak to someone above me, and I told her exactly who to talk to and when they'd be in. She threatened to come back. Nicely played, lady. And by the way, you couldn't have been in that much of a hurry to nom on your jelly beans anyway, because when it was your turn for me to cash you out, you stayed in the other line, and then proceeded to hang out and bitch about me to the other cashier, who's 87 years old (true story) and probably doesn't care, but agreed with you just so you'd both have someone to talk to for a few minutes. So suck it, lady. *Smirk*

And to my knowledge, she still hasn't come back. Jerk...go figure. It's Jerk Thursday at Walgreens.

That's enough for one day, I think. Too many other stories so share, but the shower's calling my name. Peace, GO SABRES!! And GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fPZ_dC3ymAs&feature=related
April 4, 2012 at 4:57pm
April 4, 2012 at 4:57pm
#750226
THE PROMPT: "Several television stations have ‘reality shows” about businesses, is the business/career you have/had "reality show” worthy. Why or why not? What would be the name of the show? If you don't work choose somebody you know and their business/career."

Well hello there, and a fine afternoon to you all. What's good out there? A day off and some relaxation is what, I'll tell you. *Delight*

What's not good? "Reality" tv. Because we all know it's pretty much the farthest thing from it.

The regulars around this spot know that I'm not a tv watcher. Outside of Bills and Sabres games, and falling asleep at night to Sportscenter on ESPN, I could pretty much do without a television.

But I will admit to copping a few episodes of "The Celebrity Apprentice" on NBC. Why? I don't know. Maybe it's a fetish of seeing people who had/have money reducing themselves in some way. Or the once-famous making a last-ditch effort at salvaging their career. But whatever.

The irony I'm about to put on display is ridiculous. I work for Walgreens, and TCA's show this past week featured the celebs working on a Walgreens campaign. I'm off on Sundays. I didn't watch the episode. It's on the DVR if and when I want to. But I really don't like to be bothered by my work on my day off. I don't mind getting random texts from coworkers on my day off, but really...I can do without my one little bit of tv enjoyment being all about my employer.

What really needs to happen is a camera needs to follow me around while I'm at work, so you fine people who read this tasty slice of internet pie can see what it is I go through when I'm on my pedestal, complaining about some of the shit I have to deal with while I'm getting paid to count nothings. You should see it through my eyes. I'd be the perfect subject. To see me drop what I'm doing and complain would make me the perfect "hero/villian" for all of retail. And when you go back and reread some of the things I've said, you'll have a better understanding of what it is I speak of.

And I'd love for it to be televisioned under the name "Walk With Walgreens", but I can't have that happen. See, that's already been trademarked because it's what the hangers-on on TCA were already working on. So it'd have to be something more along the lines of the "People Of Walmart" or "Best Buy Sucks" websites. I'm still struggling for a name as I type this. Maybe it should just be called "Retail Hell" and do it Tosh.0 style where I enlist other friends in different aspects of retail, and we share different video clips of the nonsense customers pull on a daily basis. Hey Hollywood, you hear me? Let's do this. Stat. Pronto. NOW!! Throw me a stupid amount of money and let's make this the next "reality", because lord knows, it's a hell of a lot more real than "Survivor", "Desperate Teen Moms From Hollywood Housewives Of <insert random city here>" or "Jersey Shore".

On a random sidenote, yesterday I was commissioned to change the posters we hang in our store's lobby. That included taking down the one which featured Donald Trump and it promoted our company's appearance on TCA. As per G-Stamm's idea, I cut out The Donald's head. We're still running an "Employee Of The Month" program, and this current month's winner hasn't had her picture taken for the posterity of the award yet, so I did my part. I hung The Donald there...he truly is the EOTM for Walgreens...who knows how much money he made for the company just because of his stupid "reality" show? The CEO's and shareholders are wiping their asses with hundos now, because they know they're also saving millions in changing the management structure and screwing over a bunch of hard-working employees all around the country. That, my friends, is REALITY.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I don't even know how to soundtrack this entry. Let me see what comes to mind...here goes...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NisCkxU544c&feature=g-vrec&context=G230d629RVAAAA...

VITAL STATS:

*Cart* So this whole "Walk With Walgreens" thing on TCA has us offering a free kit when you sign up. It's a cheesy drawstring backpack and a cheap pedometer, similar to the ones they gave employees last year at the same time. Mine last year promptly broke upon opening it. Nice. Anyway, some senior center is telling their clientele that they should come to us to get their free kit, and that's it, no questions asked. Bullshit. You have to register and provide an email address. No company is gonna give you anything for free. It's all about how they can market everything else they do. So you'll get emails. I made the mistake of signing up for something once that the company offered, and now one of the reasons I keep my phone deliberately set on "silent" is that I get emails from Walgreens on my phone at all hours of the night. I don't need them to email me the weekly ad at 1am Sunday morning. I get it. Shit's on sale. You want me to but it. But don't catch me as I'm falling asllep. Jerks.

*Buttonstop* And I'm fully convinced that the people in this community only want something if it's free. Cheap pedometer and chincy backpack? All yours, WNY. Just because the box has weird picks of famous has-beens on it. Have at it. I could take a dump in a bunch of boxes and stamp "FREE!" on them, and I'm convinced those boxes would sell out in just a few hours. Nobody cares about what's in them, as long as they're free. Such a waste of resources, all in the name of advertising.

Alright, now that I'm done bitching, I'm gonna go back to the rest of the "otherwise doing nothing" portion of my day off. Thanks for playin'. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzclm3UgVss&feature=related
April 3, 2012 at 11:48pm
April 3, 2012 at 11:48pm
#750171
THE PROMPT: "Tell us about your siblings: How many sisters and brothers in order and tell us a story of you and your siblings. If you don't have any siblings of your own, tell us about some siblings in your life."

Good evening folks! I hope everyone's enjoyed themselves today...I know I have, and by "enjoyed" I mean "spent closing a store on a slow night". Yeesh. At least I get tomorrow to relax a little.

So I could sit here and kill a couple minutes talking about my four siblings, but let's face it, none of us are really that close anymore anyway, so let's bend the topic a little, shall we? Who am I ever not one to do that? *Laugh*

Sometimes in the travels of your life, you meet a lot of new, interesting people. And we all know people come and go in our lives. But sometimes you reach that magical connection with people in your life that, no matter what happens or changes or gets thrown your way, these people are always gonna have your back. You're not just friends with these people; they're family to you.

I'll never forget the day I moved from my mom's house to the next village over and into my dad's house. I was 17 and it was the day before I was to graduate high school. It was a whirlwind week of finishing packing, exams, and shuttling back and forth between houses. Things were so miserable back at home that I had even considered moving during the school year, and I had a lot of friends and cousins at the other school, but I didn't want to change districts in the middle of my last year. I stuck it out, and by June I was spending most of my free time away from home.

In February I picked up a job at the local Arby's. I hadn't started college yet, and since I was 18 I could work any shifts and such, with no restrictions. Usually I worked during the day through the lunch shifts, and I'd leave around the same time the night crew came in. Some days, this dude would walk in, he'd nod a hello at everyone, and sit in the lobby having a smoke or two and listening to the music pumpin' through his headphones before he started his shift. I'd get to know him better on the days where I'd work the 11am-7pm shift. We'd chat a little...he was friendly and personable, and very polite for a 16 or 17 year old; I was a brash, outspoken pain-in-the-ass 18 year old. His name was Dave. You may recall me referring to someone as my boy DMFM. That was him.

We started hangin' out after work or on our days off. A couple of us that worked together did. We'd go bowling (we even joined a league and won a championship once) or out for coffee or just drive around. And we'd talk. We would kill pots of coffee at Perkins some nights, meeting up with other groups of friends. Sometimes we'd know one side of the entire restaurant. Those were good times.

Through DMFM, I met one of his good friends, my boy Adam. Adam and I were friends, but not as close back then. Adam's always been a great dude, but there were stretches that I'd only see him if we were going to the same concert together. And I've never had a bad time with Adam at any of the shows we've gone to. It's only been within the last few years that Adam and I have been hangin' out more and more, doing things besides concerts. Helping each other out, hosting parties, or just getting together for Sabres games. We both, in fact, (along with DMFM's brother and another mutual friend) we stood up as groomsmen in DMFM's wedding last summer. And since then, I've seen Adam a lot more than I've seen DMFM...but that's what happens when you're married I guess.

The point is, I love those guys. We've all been through so much together, so many things that we've all seen each other through at some point in our lives. I've known these two for more than half my life, and they're not just my friends. I proudly call them my brothers, even if we're not related. All of the holidays, marriages, funerals, births of other friends' kids, concerts, games, nights out, nights in, stories created and recreated years later, that's got the same place in my heart. They will always be there for me like I am for them, and just like our unofficial motto, I suppose...through thick and thin.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

My brothers are huge music junkies just like me. We've all at some point or another turned each other on to different bands and singers at different times, even though our tastes were all over the place. I wouldn't have found a lot of my favorite artists without them. I can thank them for some of these tunes.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NbjqruCITIU&feature=relmfu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GtRkpk67wG4&feature=plcp&context=C4b1f6efVDvjVQa1...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rCwTdw6JSFY
"We're loyal, like brothers, just us versus all the others."

VITAL STATS:

*Bullet**Check* I was at work and decided to check the score of the Sabres game. They were down 3-0 already in the first period, and they can't afford to lose the rest of their games now. I was pretty bummed. As we were walking out, I remembered and figured the game (and the Sabres' playoff hopes) were over. I locked up and checked again...they won 6-5 in overtime! Whoo hoo! Must've been a freakin' amazing game! Two more chances to clinch this thing before the regular season's over. Let's do it boys!

And that's all I've got for tonight...better hurry up and get this in the forum before the clock strikes midnight and it turns into something that you'll just wind up reading later anyway. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8T095mFdW8
April 2, 2012 at 8:12pm
April 2, 2012 at 8:12pm
#750076
THE PROMPT: "Have you ever had something stolen from you? What was it? How did this make you feel? Did you get it back? Or did you hatch a plan to get it back? Do you think it would have worked?"

What's up everybody? Monday...that's what's up. I haven't worked a Monday in a long time...'til today. It was different. I'm sure my week will be thrown off some by having a different day off this week, but maybe sitting around all day before I go back in tomorrow night won't be as bad as having a string of days off and then loathing the eventual grind. We'll see.

So where do I wanna go with this prompt? Let's see...I've had things stolen from me before, personally. And I work in retail...where people steal all the time. There's just so many ways...

Ok, I've got one for ya. It's not a personal story, but it's a fun one. I used to work in a bookstore. It was a nice gig, actually. This actually happened before I started working there, so I'll relate it the best I can.

The mall the bookstore was in (the store has since closed) was one of the quieter malls in the area, but every morning there was no shortage of elderly people doing laps around the concourse at a leisurely gait. The mallwalkers. They would arrive before the stores opened, and were usually gone by lunchtime. They literally were the only people in the mall besides the workers. That's how dead this mall is.

Our store was prime tire-kicking real estate. We were situated across from an entrance hallway, near an anchor, and we had books and magazines. How many people go into a bookstore, linger around, glance at a few books, and take off without purchasing anything or saying a peep? A lot. Especially those of said mallwalking demographic. No big deal.

At the registers were all sorts of little add-on items. Bookmarks, gift cards, and Lindor chocolate truffles. The truffles? Amazing little treats. Three for a buck and a quarter, I believe. No wait, I know this...they were clearly signed, 3/$1.25 or 49 cents. So there's your info.

There used to be a mallwalker...an older gentleman of sorts. A couple times a week he'd stop in. The employees would greet them, and he'd barely acknowledge them. He'd shuffle around, look at a few things, and leave. He wasn't the, what you'd call, "good regular customer" who would "get to know you" kind of person. In retail, it happens. People pop into your store all the time and you get familiar with them and they show at least partial genuine concern about what's going on. Nope. Not this guy.

One year, the store was audited after a general inventory. It seemed that large quantities of truffles had gone missing. A large enough amount that threw out all sortsa red flags. Were they shipped but not sent? Were they not received properly? Maybe they weren't being rung up at the correct sale price? No.

This unassuming old man was stealing them! *Shock* The guys who worked during the day started keeping an eye on him. It was bad enough that he'd come in every day and not even try to make small talk. That's just rude...if there's places I find myself frequenting and seeing the same people, I make an attempt to at least be nice and personable with them. Hey, I'm here, you're here, I'mma say "What's up?" and you're gonna have an answer, cuz we're all tryin' to get through this life somehow, so why not make it interesting?

Well, they finally caught him. He'd walk into the store, scout around, and on his way out he'd snag a few truffles. And it's my understanding that he thought they were complementary. I could be wrong about this, and I may need to talk to a few of my fellow ex-employees of the store about it, but they nabbed him in the act. And really, they were signed clearly with the price. Complementary? It's not like the sign said "Hey! Take a handful of these delicious Lindor Truffles!" Fuck no...this dude just felt like he was intitled. I mean, really? What store gives away anything like that on an honor system anymore? That's no different than me walking into a gas station and cracking open a six pack without saying "Thank you!" first to the counter help.

Man, I tell ya...people are a mess these days. I could tell you stories that are as long as the night is about retail horrors. Maybe someday I'll speak of the guy who "stole" porn by slicing open the magazine sleeves and sticking the porn in another magazine, and then look at it in the store. Then he'd slide it back in its plastic covering and take off. Or the guy who'd write on index cards his right-wing agenda and stick the cards in magazines he'd deem "unfit" for his causes. Those were great times. I miss that kind of elderly hooliganism.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

When I lived at 542, I once dated a crazy girl. I've probably mentioned her before in passing. She was nice enough once to offer to come to 542 to pick up clothes to take to the dry cleaners. Only, she needed my keys to get into my apartment. So she came into work, I slipped her my keys, she dropped my clothes off and gave the keys back. And this was before I had a deadbolt installed. She failed to properly secure the door upon closing. The night before, the upstairs neighbor was talking to some shady people at my doorway while I was talking to him, and they kept looking around him and I and into my apartment. The door led right into my dining room, where I spent a lot of time on my laptop. There was also my digital camera and a stack of cd's on the table. When I came home that night, I noticed my door was ajar and my laptop was gone. But just the laptop. Not the charger, not the cd's, not the camera. Just the laptop. I shoulda ditched that girl then and there. But that in itself is another story for another time.

Why this song? Because I was just getting into this band around the same time. And I couldn't stop listening to this cd. And I never sold coke and I never had to hold a pistol, and I'm always finding myself caught between the vice and the advice. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vbn7nBZk-Xg

VITAL STATS:

*Pencil* Looks like I need to be catching up on emails and blogs. Ahhh, the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS.

*Cart* Yeah, working on a Monday still sucks. Idiocity never takes a day off in my world though, and it doesn't discrimate on which day of the week it occurs on more. Stupid people celebrate themselves every day, and in every unimaginable way, in my store. Too many examples to remember and cite today. I just know that at one point, I was ready to hit the fetal position in the office and weep for them, and for me not only having to deal with them, but for the way I treated them and that I was pushed so far to say whatever it was I said to them that was not offensive, and they didnt get it, but we all on the other side got it.

And now I'm gonna be a good little boy and hit those emails and blogs, and try to get to bed at a decent hour after that. We'll see. Maybe, maybenot. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6NNUBvNG5JI
April 1, 2012 at 11:29pm
April 1, 2012 at 11:29pm
#750007
THE PROMPT: "In honor of the journey ahead, list your must-haves for a successful road trip. Feel free to expand with your favourite road trip anecdote."

Good evening everyone! Welcome back to a "finally official" "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS. It's gonna be a good month...I can feel it! Good luck to all the participants and judges...now, let's get into it!

Road trips. Who doesn't love a good roadie? In my world, you only need a few things for a successful road trip (besides the obvious...money, gas, a working vehicle). Good friends, great tunes, sunshine, and make sure you're ready to have a memorable experience. You don't necessarily even need a destination when you've got the perfect mix of ingredients going on.

I've been on a few in my day. Back in '99 my family drove from Buffalo to Nashville to see some family friends. One year some friends and I took a guy's weekend out in Cleveland. And not too long ago we drove with some family to Savannah, GA for a wedding (you can read details about that starting here: "Redefining "Historic", Day 1).

But the most exciting ones for me have been the day trips. Driving with your boys to see a concert in a city that you don't call home. The pins on my map would look something like this: Pittsburgh to see Wu-Tang Clan and Rage Against The Machine; Barrie, ON to see Cheap Trick and Pearl Jam, and later to see Radiohead; Rochester and Syracuse to see The Tragically Hip. Good times with great dudes.

I think I've shared this story before, but I'll share it one more time. Possibly the best and worst concert experience occured on the road trip to Barrie for Pearl Jam and Cheap Trick. It was a four hour drive up there, which wasn't bad...four of us squashed into a Chevy Beretta jammin' PJ the whole way...I wanna say this was back in the summer of '98.

We got there fine, all was well, and we separated a bit because Cracker and (I can't remember if Matthew Good or Matthew Sweet) were playing on another stage. We reconvened as PJ was setting up, and had a decent spot about 50 feet from the stage. We were all big Pearl Jam fans...we'd all go to the midnight release parties when they'd put out a new album, and for a couple of them we'd head back to my apartment and play the newest cd over and over and over. When Binaural came out, my buddy Verno and I played it for hours, drinkin' beers and shootin' the shit 'til almost 8am. We lit cigars and sat on the patio talking about the album.

But anyway, so the concert's about to begin. Everything's great, and literally three seconds into this song, the opening chords, everything changed. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S73ypK3As8I The crowd surged and rushed to the front of the stage. It was mayhem! Our group got split up...DMFM and Verno got pushed one way, and me and this sweet dude Mark got swept up in the rush to the front of the stage. In seconds, I was 10 feet away from Eddie Vedder.

The problem with that? Ten feet from the stage is where the mosh pits are. But hell, I was 23, still had a decent body, I didn't care. I was dancing along to the music, not being too aggressive, but enjoying myself while trying to GTFO of there as well as keeping an eye on Mark. It seemed like the more I tried to back out and get away, the more the crowd swelled and kept me in.

This worked out fine until the crowd surfing started about three songs in. At that point, you're more concerned about your life than the show you've been dying to see. Around the fifth song, one chick got really close while riding the crowd. I put my arms up to try and move her along, but one man does not defeat a crowd. She got swung around and kicked me in the face. My glasses and my favorite hat went flying! I scrambled for a minute or two to try and find my glasses, but gave up; the crowd was too tight. At this point I should mention that my vision is terrible...20/300 in one eye and 20/400 in the other (at the time).

I gave up. A few songs later I managed to work my way out of the fiasco, but I couldn't see a damn thing. I tell people all the time when the subject comes up it was the best concert I ever heard. But it was hard to enjoy. I was practically blind in a foreign country, I lost my friends, and it was getting dark. I was covered in dirt from the pit, and it was the end of August. I was hot, sweaty, and the more I stood still, the sorer I got from the abuse I was subjected to. Not a good situation.

The show finally ended, and I just followed the crowd out in the direction they were going, wondering what I was gonna do. I climbed the fence of the beer garden and hit the main road of the outdoor venue and kept walking. As I turned a corner, my arm was yanked and I was pulled aside. My friends had waited for me by the main entrance, hoping to catch me. Now, this was in a time where cell phones weren't as useful...our phones didn't work in Canada the way they did now. Jeez, come to think of it, text messaging didn't even exist back then.

I was so glad and grateful, and sore as all get-out. I crumbled into the back of that tiny Chevy Beretta, a sweaty, dirty mess. No matter how I sat, I couldn't get comfortable. What's worse is the Molson Ampitheater in Barrie had probably the worst parking lot structure in all of mankind...it took us two hours to get out of the parking lot. Couple that with hitting late night Toronto traffic, and it made for an eight hour drive home.

We stopped somewhere along the QEW at some roadside diner for a bite to eat. We sat down at the booth, and I had to hold the menu super close to my face in order to read it. The guys were making fun of me, and I just smiled. I didn't realize just how disgusting and dirty I was from everything being kicked up in the pit until then...because my teeth had dirt on them. I was so simutaneously grossed out and laughing that my nose started running...and when I blew it, it was all dirt that came out.

We finally made it home around 6:30am, and I was so exhausted that I couldn't even shower. I collapsed in my bed, knowing I'd have to change the sheets. My body was spent and my mind was shot. But it was my first real road trip, and it was an experience that I've cherished to this day and beyond. Hell, I didn't even mind paying $250 for new glasses a week later after wearing my sports goggles to drive and wearing my previous, weaker pair just to function at work. But that hat...a plain black Nike hat with the white swoosh on the front and a velcro closure, faded to brown when I would leave it in my car's back window...I miss that hat all the time. That will never be replaced.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

When we went to Nashville in '99, I made two mix-tapes (oh, did I love making mix-tapes *Delight*) for the ride. I know this song was on it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PcFUSxKhITk&feature=related

This song just reminds me of the open road...no worries, no cares, just driving. It's beautiful for a sunny springtime day (which today was not) when you can just turn the windows down and the stereo up and see where the road takes you. It'd be the perfect song for a road trip if it were only a couple hours long. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mW05m41_GM

And this might be the best song ever about a road trip gone awry. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WILyWmT2A-Q&ob=av2e

VITAL STATS:

*Basketball* I don't normally watch hoops anymore, but it's NCAA tournament time. We were visiting family and the womens' semi-final UConn/Notre Dame game was on, and I like ND so I watched with Jess' brother-in-law. I enjoy watching sports with him because we can talk about the game as educated fans. UConn had this really tall, butchy lookin' chick who was a beast when she was out there, but got into foul trouble. They showed her on the bench with a stat graphic, and the first one that jumped out was 6-10. We were like, "Damn! She's tall!" But no, that wasn't her height. It was her shooting percentage from the floor. Whoops. *Smirk*

*Buckle* It's been a busy weekend. We hosted a few of Jess' ex-coworkers and family last night, some of whom road-tripped themselves back home for a weekend of showing off their new arrival, and one who is awaiting a new arrival of her own. It was nice to see all of them again.

*Cart* Who works on a Monday? Ugh. I've gotta work in the morning. The only thing worse in my job than working on a Monday is having to work a Sunday morning. No thank you.

So with that, I'll leave you be. Thanks for stopping by the first official April entry...29 more left! Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXfUSmdGa6E
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HOer13WNPfk
March 28, 2012 at 11:50pm
March 28, 2012 at 11:50pm
#749757
THE PROMPT: "If you were going to redecorate your home, what would you change?"

Good evening, fine people out there. One last prompt for the month for me before April's official "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS. No offense nor boycott of any kind is meant for the "serial portion" of prompts, but know that I'll have a busy weekend coming up between our work schedules and some friends we're hosting Saturday from out of town after work for pizza, wings and Sabres hockey. You'll understand.

So an interesting topic came up at work this afternoon. There's this Lottery drawing, the Mega Millions Jackpot or something like that, and apparently the next draw is up to over $500 million. $500 million!! Say those words over and over in your head and try to place some significance in it. Let it wash over you. A lot of people play that "What if..." game and the going rate generally starts at $1 million dollars. Like, "What if I had a million dollars? How would I spend it?" Now multiply that one by, ohhhh, 500, and ask yourself that question. And hold that thought.

I don't play the lotto. Well, I should say I don't play it anymore. I rarely if ever have played the daily numbers or Pick 4. Occasionally I'd do the Take 5 or the Daily Lotto. Every once in awhile I'd play Quick Draw while grocery shopping, but for years my biggest gamble was on the instant scratch-offs. I'd blow through $20-$30 at a time when I had the money to do so. But I gave that up a long time ago, because it wasn't worth it, and it was no longer fun to waste that kind of money so quickly.

Well, today I took a chance on Friday's Mega Millions drawing. Just like millions of others who never play the numbers until the jackpot makes it seem like you'll get stupid rich really fast. But let's face it...say I take home the top prize. After taxes, I'm only pocketing $300 million. Let the question answering begin!

For starters, I don't need much. I don't need a fancy house to live in. In fact, in lieu of "redecorating our house", the house we rent by the way, I'd rather just buy our house with straight-up cash money from our landlord. Shit, he don't need it...he's got plenty of other houses right in the neighborhood he owns. Give him fair value and let it be.

I'd definitely get us a second car, and get Jess a new one. Maybe (big maybe) get the boys cars too, but they're still paying for gas and insurance. They didn't pick the lucky ticket, even if their mom picked the lucky guy, ya hear? I wouldn't even go crazy with the car...maybe a decent, but not over-the-top, truck of some sort. Back in the day for me it would've been a silver, two-door Chevy Blazer. It's been so long since I've even paid attention to what kinds of cars are even out there on the road today that I would not even care to know what I want. I know I like PT Cruisers and Jeeps. So I'd be thinking something like that for myself.

And honestly, justjessica1 handles most of the decorating. The living room, kitchen, bedroom and bathroom are all pretty much her ideas, with my input quieried as a courtesy. I called dibs on my ManCave, and all I'd really do is maybe get a bigger tv and some matching furniture. Maybe get the shelf built I want to display distinctive bottles of adult beverages I've had the opportunity to let my taste buds experience over the years. But that's really it. Now, on the other hand, I'm sure Jess could easily find a million ways to blow through $300 million redecorating, and do it probably no sooner than the ink has dried on that giant fake cardboard check they hand you when you do your publicity run after winning.

Oh, actually, there is one little redecorating project I might consider undertaking. I'd buy a modest home, somewhere close by, and put the basics in there...some furniture, a washer and dryer, a few things here we wouldn't need, and let the kids live in it. Rent would be negotiable based on their incomes/responsibilities/legalities. And they can see what it's like to have to start out on their own, doing their own dishes (without a dishwasher) and laundry (they're ok with that) and having to clean up after themselves. And they could host us for dinner once a week. Sure, we'd lose a lot of our fortune on the deal, but I could think of a lot of other things we'd be saving. Is it that wrong of me to consider that as possibly the best renovation project I could easily blow $300 million on? *Smirk*

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Gotta bust out some jams for this...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1k456in_fDA

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjZRAvsZf1g

VITAL STATS:

*Bullet**Check* Huge win for the Sabres last night, swiping 8th place and the hope of securing the 8th seed in the Eastern Conference by defeating the Caps and breaking their tie for 8th. I know, that's a lot of 8's. But you'll have that. I'm excited at the prospect of hockey later on into April and May.

*Eat* So the grill was busted out in March...I know we're not the first to do it this year around here but it's always good when you can say you had the grill out in March. Steaks...yeah!! Now had we not run out of propane, maybe I wouldn't have eaten at 9pm. And if the grill had been shut off once or twice after using it by the people using it (and it was not me...I'm vigilant about wasting propane), we would've had dinner at a more normal hour with less issues. That's a lot of March's and usings. You'll have that too.

*Man* Uhhh, that'll hafta suffice as a "nap" emoticon, since that's what I did when I got home, for the first time in forever. And it felt almost like I didn't...one minute I was hearing the hum of voices on the tv (I need sound when I sleep), and the next minute I was in the middle of crazy dreams. But I'll take that over some of the reasons as to why I normally don't nap...the terror naps I used to take were about enough to scare me off naps unless absolutely necessary. So it was a good nap.

And with that, I'mma go on and get back to a little routine I like to call "nothing big" and settle down before I actually sleep for real tonight. Have a great tomorrow people, and wish me luck on Friday! Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6kOg97PvOxE
March 26, 2012 at 4:55pm
March 26, 2012 at 4:55pm
#749630
THE PROMPT: "What inspires you to write?"

Good afternoon friends...don't let last week's weather and today's blistering sunshine fool you. According to The Weather Channel app on the Blackberry, it's a downright unfair 37 degrees out there in The 'Lo. But I will refrain from any further complaints about not wearing shorts in March or already needing to weed the patio and gardens because I'm not in the mood to complain. Kinda.

I took a few days off from taxing my creative energy, to ensure I still have something in the tank come this time next month during an official "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS contest run, and it's helped, I can say without doubt. While writing can be considered a muscle in that you have to exercise it in order for it to grow, you need to be careful as to not overwork it. That's why I enjoy the unofficial challenges as much as the official ones...I'm allowed to work at my own pace to stay in shape until it's time to do the heavy lifting an official challenge requires.

So this prompt...what inspires me? Many things, dear readers. Many things. Anyone who's a regular around these parts of internet infantry knows I can take cues from just about anything and spit out a thousand words that become humorous pixels of words dancing in front of your eyes on your selected screen of choice. There's no formula for success in that regard, however. Sometimes it's a combination of luck and skill, just like anything else we do. Hey, even the best chefs in the world can fuck up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich once in awhile. I don't quite know where I was going with that analogy, but you'll have that...primarily because it's tasty. Or something.

But I digress...the main key of inspiration is having the wherewithal to just be able to do it. If I didn't like it or want to do it, I simply wouldn't. It's as simple of a premise as sharing and relating. I feel the need, so I act upon it. Those who can, do, and those who can't, well, they don't...it's that easy (to paraphrase something else I heard a long time ago).

Inspiration also takes many forms. It's much easier for me to write from a prompt, especially one I can relate to, speak to, converse with, or somehow bastardize. But how? Inspiration is all around us...you just have to be able to see it. The combination of a solid prompt and a good story, situation, event or otherwise can and usually leads to something decently successful (in my head).

Personally speaking, it's easy for me to take a lot of inspiration from the stupid people I encounter on an almost-daily basis. You'd already know that if you read even 10% of the things I write in this collection of mass-insanity. Now mind you, I'm not immune from this phenomenon. I've done my fair share of stupid things and have suffered occasionally from poor decision-making. I've irritated people (intentionally and unintentionally, and I have to live with that knowledge). But sometimes there's nothing better than a good rant about general idiocity, ignorance, or other people's problems. And unofficial studies have shown that when I have something good to rant about, people tend to respond. It's almost a gift and a curse, I think.

But enough about me regarding this prompt. What else inspires me? The competitor in me. I'm a competitive person, no matter what the stakes. I'm not a sore loser, but let's face it, I don't like to lose. Anything. I've always felt like an underdog in a lot of things I've done. And I've proved a lot of people wrong. Something like the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS may seem like no big deal to most folks that aren't a part of it, but I've never entered it just to waste an hour of my time every day for a month. I enter it because I want to win it. Shit, if I entered an ass-kicking contest and only had one leg, I'd still be trying my damnedest to win that thing. If there were a penny-licking contest, I'd deal with spitting copper for weeks after just by trying to win. That's my mindset. That's how I'm wired. I want to be the best in everything I do...in everything I set my mind to. Once I latch on to something, I'm all-in. Nothing can stop me, and I refuse to be stood up to.

That said, I'm also inspired by WDC as well. There's no shortage of talent on this site, that's for sure. My goal, my mission, besides providing readable, thought-provoking content that occasionally makes you laugh, cry, or (pick your emoticon), is to be remembered amongst his peers for doing something great in his medium. I see things and I say to myself "Self, how can I make that better?" I've been on these internet pages for a lot of years; probably more than many of the people I've encountered. And it's the same thing...to be respected among the elite that have digitally graced the walls of WDC. Maybe it's more "motivation" than "inspiration", but it is what it is...and as much as it's me typing out consecutive words that people love to read, it's also the other people doing it that keep me going on, doing what I do. I give a lot of credit to the talented individuals who aren't afraid to share their words...their art...with the rest of the world via WDC. You start out blind...nameless and faceless, cultivating a personality. Eventually it becomes you; it's who you are. Liked or hated, you've made an imprint somehow, somewhere, on somebody.

Before I start to ramble, I'll just wrap this up. I've come across many great people on my WDC journey. I've even been able to meet a few in person, and it's been a wonderful experience. I want to thank all of you for being who you are, doing what you do, and encouraging me in what I do. My biggest inspiration? It's knowing that without you people, I'm just a guy bangin' keys on a laptop that wouldn't be heard otherwise.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

With the Sabres embroiled in a nasty chase for the final playoff slot in the Eastern Conference, I came across this the other day. I had totally forgotten about it. I love it. *Delight* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufEtQcisrgg

VITAL STATS:

It's been a slow month for me, and I'll take it. Never let the highs get too high nor the lows get too low, cuz there's always somethin' goin' in the perifs of the middle that you never know what might jump up and hit ya. Words to live by, folks. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8UL_9R_W-Y
March 22, 2012 at 1:36am
March 22, 2012 at 1:36am
#749319
THE PROMPT: “If you could select one song to best describe what kind of day you are having, what would that song be?”

Good evening everyone. Tried to sneak a few days off in before April, but I figured since Thundersbeard 30DBC JULY HOST was kind enough to NB me in the prompt, I figured it would be considerate of me to have a take. (And while we're at it, can someone tell me what "NB" stands for? Please and thank you.)

I actually started an entry late Monday night (more like Tuesday morning), but I was out running the Elmwood District and couldn't stay awake to complete it. That may change soon, as I may go back and edit it and make it public. But this is what you get for now. Plus, I was running short on ambition, and figured a few days away would be helpful once this "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS goes live in April.

It's typically hard for me to select one song to describe a day. My days often move in many different directions. My thoughts and emotions can be all over the place at any given moment. Add to that the five days a week I'm at work, stuck hearing what feels like the 10 lamest songs out of 12 played over and over for eight hours...and Jess wonders why I don't want to watch tv. It's because I want to hear good music for a change.

If you know me you know I'm a music nerd, junkie, collector and snob. I know what I like, why I like it, and can probably tell you a story about it. My iPod has over 14,000 songs and still has some room to grow. It has a lot of the songs you love, and some only I can appreciate. It's an instant party for the "occasional listener", and a blast when shuffle plays cool shit. It's not for those who are easily offended. But, what else is there for those who are easily offended? Not these beats and riffs, fo' sho'.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

So like I was trying to allude to, it's hard to pick one song to describe the day that I had. I worked, Jess hung with her parents and brother, I had a few things to do otherwise, and then we went to dinner with her parents. We never had a problem going to the spot we chose (hint: it was our "first date" spot). But the service was terrible from a self-proclaimed new waitress, who had very poor table manners, we waited over half an hour for our food in a not-so-crowded restaurant, and there were other issues outside of the food being overcooked and all of us being served in stages rather than all at once. She'd bring out some of our food, but not everyone's, and then chitchat at the table behind ours while waiting for the rest of the food. I somehow couldn't comprehend that (and that's not even mentioning her ignorance when I asked her about a few "specials"...you work here and your job depends on it, so know it).

Really, the only song I could use to define a day in particular would be this song. It fits for today and most days, when you really don't understand things and maybe don't care to. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JKcdaY-ZxnU

VITAL STATS:

*Bullet**Check* Got to see the Sabres shut out the Habs, 3-0, while eating terrible food with Jess' parents.

*Pencil* I'll reconnect the dots from Monday night soon and make that entry public. I need to serve the word and the evening. It was magical, surreal, and fun for me. But there's more to it than what it means to me. I need to get that out there.

And with that I bid you all a fond GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5pojx6kflw ...that song could qualify too about today. Not that you'll listen to it.
March 18, 2012 at 9:29pm
March 18, 2012 at 9:29pm
#749127
THE PROMPT: "DISCUSS SOMEONE ELSE'S BLOG ENTRY"

Good evening everyone! It's nice to be back after taking a night off from the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS to relax a little...and besides, with this month being "unofficial", I didn't have much to lose. I also really didn't have an exciting day that I could serve the "How Was Your Day?" query much justice, so I just assumed it'd be a safer bet to spend my St. Patrick's Day watching a Sabres game with four of my Guinness buddies. No harm done there, right? *Wink*

I almost took today off from the unofficial portion also, because nothing really stood out to me in the Challenge Forum. I'm sorry, but one-line or a couple of sentences really doesn't allow me enough info to form an opinion on something someone else writes, and by that I mean no disrespect to anyone. I also understand that the entries will probably be a lot more meaningful to the participants in April, and there will be more participants then, which will allow for a better variety of entries to choose from for a prompt like today's. So you'll understand.

I did, however, spend part of my day catching up on some other blogs that haven't been posted in the Challenge Forum, and one in particular stood out to me and may be of some help to the fellow Challenge participants during April. It comes from T30DBC's (see what I did there?) very own Thundersbeard 30DBC JULY HOST , and his entry, "Invalid Entry.

I hope he doesn't mind me discussing this; I assume he won't since it is in his blog. He discusses briefly how the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS is going to be judged going forward from the "radical curve" method it's been previously judged upon. I think it's only fair to the entrants to know what the emphasis is and where and how important it will be. I think Michael's on the right track with this whole thing so far, and that he's as open about it as he is (as opposed to the closed-minded, cryptic and logic-defying manners of a previous judge) speaks volumes for his concern regarding the integrity and composure of this once-popular and upstanding citizen of a contest this was. So cheers, Thundersbeard 30DBC JULY HOST ! You're my entry of the week! *Bigsmile*

MUSICAL BREAK!!

In honor of yesterday being St. Patrick's Day, I'll go Irish for tonight's specials. St. Paddy's Day is that big of a deal in the city of Buffalo that they had not one, but two parades this weekend. And for the umpteenth year in a row, I was unable to revel in the festivities. Don't worry; I made up for it in other ways.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=co6WMzDOh1o&ob=av2e

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hvzMSPzll4M

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXwtHJQ66Rk

VITAL STATS:

*Sun* Two words x2 for you about the last two days to all you haters who think Buffalo is about snow, cold, and chicken wings: Shorts Weather!! In MARCH!! It's been over 70 degrees the last two days, and it's getting better. Those not from around the area that follow me here know that it's not really been a winter at all. I think the reports have stated we've gotten about 35 inches of snow this season...and I can recall a few evenings just in the last few years where that's happen in just one night. Yes, we've been lucky this year, y'all. But not as lucky as you can imagine...this just means I'll be out weeding the gardens and patio that much earlier and more often this year. I'll just never win, will I? *Smirk*

*Thumbsup* Managed to do a little cleaning on my day off, knowing that tomorrow will consist of running errands and either hosting some of Jess' family for dinner or meeting her brother out for pops in the Elmwood area. It is, however, supposed to rain. I'm voting for pops on Elmwood.

Alright, my brain's a waste from all of this fun for an evening. Besides, Celebrity Apprentice is on, and I like watching rich fools fight over money that isn't even theirs try to win more of it. How about this...instead of supporting your charity and getting your name back out there by winning money from Donald Trump, you just dig into your own pocket and show them your money, and actually do things with that charity, rather than make us think you're some kind of publicity hog that hands over fake, oversized cardboard checks to show how awesome you are? You don't need a tv show to get involved. Just do it! But yet I watch, probably because I like to see the emotional breakdowns of rich people failing. They're not crying because they let down 10,000 kids in a 3rd world country...they're crying because this is a last-ditch effort at salvaging their own careers. Don't let them fool you! It's all for show. That said, peace to my boy Adam for being the sweetest dude all day in many different ways, peace to my girl justjessica1 for always being who she is, peace to all y'all for letting me kill a couple minutes of your day, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5K8zlbDrds
March 17, 2012 at 12:42am
March 17, 2012 at 12:42am
#749030
THE PROMPT: "HOW WAS YOUR DAY? WHAT HAPPENED?"

Good evening, friends. Here's the brief rundown of the day, in my classic, old-school bullet point fashion.

*Bullet* I'm not even remotely religious, but there's something about this time of year that screams at me about eating fish on Fridays (and you'll notice I said nothing about not eating meat). I was born and raised Catholic, but I like so many others have rebelled and strayed from the "faith", for reasons that I'm sure will turn up sometime or another. It's just that there's something about this time of year that makes a good old fish fry sound so damn appetizing...and my boy down the street RJ has a tremendous one. I have to also give some props to D'Agostino's, in the plaza where I work, for a crazy good fish sub. It's like a mini-beer battered fish finger on a sub roll, done up any way you like. Good eats.

When people ask me why I'm eating fish on a Friday and if it's because of Lent, I immediately say no. I'm not a practicing Catholic. It's because I have the taste for it. Then I back it up like I did today by having Arby's for lunch.

*Bullet* The fog outside is phenomenal!

*Bullet* My laptop likes to randomly shut down. I may have said this before; I don't remember.

*Bullet* Jess has family back in town. Let the Ill Communication Olympics begin!! Oh, wait, they already did.

*Bullet* I don't use Twitter much, but sometimes I just have to. Take this for instance: http://twitpic.com/8x1l4t. I couldn't resist. Sometimes A lot of times at work I have to count things that don't exist. Sometiimes I have to do it off of a report, and the report lists descriptions of products. Sometimes, the descriptions have to be very abbreviated; in this case, it's makeup. If the pic I linked doesn't translate, it's "C/G BLT FLPSTK SMCH". If I didn't know any better, I'd say CoverGirl came out with a lipstick that tastes like a Bacon, Lettuce and Tomato sammich on Flap-stackers (which I would consider to be something like a pancake). I told Jess I'd kiss her more if her lips tasted like that. She laughed. I win.

And that was today. Tomorrow will be less of the same, and I can tell you that now.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Just a fun little song to accentuate the mood around here lately... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C3D3AKAlci4

VITAL STATS:

Bullet points = all of that. That's what you get when today is boring. Tomorrow doesn't promise much more in the way of excitement, but with family in town that could change. Til one of us knows what's going on, peace out. GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nqHysJEej0Y
March 15, 2012 at 8:49pm
March 15, 2012 at 8:49pm
#748981
THE PROMPT: "Are cell phones dangerous?"

Good evening y'all...let me finish parking the car so I can type out the rest of this entry in the garage from my cell phone...*Laugh* just kidding. That's annoying.

So, are cell phones really dangerous? Well, there's the whole "texting and driving" thing. That can get pretty ugly...you're trying to watch the road and you end up taking shortcuts, texting nuggets like "Lets eat grandma" instead of "Let's have dinner, grandma!", or "dammit cnt blieve i just spilt my beer all ovr my dashbord whl readin ur last txt :(" Those can lead to unpleasant moments, fo' sho'.

Ever been hit in the head or face with a cell phone? And I don't mean opening up your Motorola Star-Tac and misjudging where the part on the flip that accepts your voice accidentally hits you in the tooth so hard you think you chipped it...I mean when someone's using your head as a target and they've wound up with their Motorola Star-Tac like they're Randy Johnson, about to pop off a 100mph fastball. That hurts! Where's the bird to save me from that? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KxEUW3pQX6A

But so many people are worried that cell phones will cause brain cancer. I, friends, say nay. I'll tell you what causes cancer. Let me put my cigarette down and look it up in an encyclopedia. Yeah, there it is...the mutating of cells in a bad way causes cancer. So basically, cancer causes cancer, because the cancer makes your cells mutate into these things called tumors. And tumors are part of the tulip family. They're like a tulip, only with twice the beauty. What damage does using a cell phone actually cause, might you ask? Well, when a person mixes themself with alcohol, there's always the risk of suffering from diarrhea of the fingers. The symptoms? Sending texts you wouldn't normally send, taking pictures of yourself in various states of undress you might not normally take, and most commonly, pressing the button that has the green stuff on it (most often, it's referred to as "drunk dialing"). Maybe states should look into some kind of way to legislate that, because it's a phenomenon that's been happening since the advent of the cellular phone. Thankfully, it wasn't that much of a problem at Bayside High. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PBWneSL5MWI

So, in conclusion, cell phones are bad. Unless you're playing Angry Birds. That's one addiction that I fear there may never be a cure for.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I was actually at this show, and this song is amazing. The audio isn't great, but the lyrics are kinda cool. "There's danger in the language...I suggest no further use of the two-way radios." http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKTn7qlhkgw

This is the album version, where the lyrics are more audible. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5DL20PyghM One of their heavier songs...I love seeing it live and feeding off it.

VITAL STATS:

*Football* Bills fans, your defense just got mega-awesome with the signing of Mario Williams!! Sure, it took the biggest contract for a defensive player in the history of the NFL, but when your owner's damn near dead and you've got extra money laying around, you do it and sign a guy who could be the face of the franchise's defense for years. This is a man hittin' his prime. Dude's a baller, a straight-up QB killer. I like my football team today. *Delight*

Other than that, that's all. Boring day today. Not much more to speak of, so I'll leave you with the prompt, kick a hole in the speakers, pull the plug and just jet. Peace, love, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HCTcqa0D64
March 14, 2012 at 8:25pm
March 14, 2012 at 8:25pm
#748933
THE PROMPT: "My Offline Community and How I Engage With It."

Good evening friends! Interesting prompt today. Listen to me try to deal with it.

I'm fairly engaging with my online community, and that at times can be an understatement. My offline community? Probably not so much. Allow me to break down my thoughts on the differences between the two (somewhat intersecting) circles.

My online community consists primarily of people I haven't seen in years from high school or past jobs, the vibrant and wonderful WDC community, my close friends, and the Madden Superstars On Facebook groups and forum. That's as far as I limit myself online. Ya know, the whole "don't spread yourself too thin" theory. I'm pretty open in those venues, because I'm fairly comfortable with things. I lay shots, and I take shots, and I'm ok with that. Maybe I feel like there's a thin veil of protection behind my laptop's screen, but I can usually defend myself against most situations, plus there's that other option of not being paid attention to if I post something that turns stomachs.

My offline community? It's a little different. It's me and Jess, her family, our friends, and my coworkers (I guess you could add some of the regular customers at work to that list...I'm pretty much open with all of them the same way). I'm quiet to an extent, unless I have something to say. I keep to myself unless I feel comfortable enough opening up about whatever is on my mind or feel like I have something to add to whatever's being discussed. The biggest difference is that I don't just pick up my phone and call people. I don't know why I have such a hard time with that, and it doesn't make sense to me.

That all being said, here's where I come off as a hypocrite...I'm generally a private person, even though I shed a lot of light into my life on this very screen you're reading this on. The circles above that I mentioned? You could almost draw concentric circles around them before you try to overlap them with the bigger circles, in order to gage who I'll feel comfortable talking to about different things.

See, there's certain things I'll only share with certain people. Some people I'm just closer to than others, and that comes in all facets of both off- and online friends. It's a fact of life any of us can attest to (hint: I'm not saying anything groundbreaking here). That's just how it is. Your instincts tell you who you can trust with what, and if people are so inclined, they'll be sure to find out more about you whether you want to know it or not. Everyone has secrets and everyone has a past, and no one has ever been immune from doing things in life they've later come to regret. The only variable in that equation is that you never know how people are going to respond to things that you might think are unsavory in your past. While you may be a fairly good judge of character, you may be surprised to learn about what others think of you that you didn't expect, positively or negatively.

I don't really have a point to this, other than to add that you have to trust your gut with people, and know who you can tell what. Know yourself, know your surroundings, and trust your judgement. Sometimes, you only get one chance for a true impression. It doesn't matter if you're in the breakroom with your coworkers, or you're discussing your Madden team and the game itself, or not agreeing with what someone writes in their blog. Whether you like it or not, there's still a human behind all of that. Respect is still deserved, because you don't know what's happening behind their face.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

To soundtrack this entry, I'm going to go old-school. But not like last night. At least, I don't think so...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RaekgRtsTiQ

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TlBTPITo1I&ob=av2e

VITAL STATS:

*Info* Happy 3/14 Pi Day!! You math nerds all get it...3.14, Pi, the numerical signification for something I don't even remember these days. In honor of this day, I will post the most offensive song related to Pi I've ever heard (and probably the most offensive song I've ever posted). So, if you, like, get offensive toward me about my offending video, you'll only have yourseelf to blame. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NIAMTdql_g And the fact that I can get away with posting this means I have the coolest girlfriend in the world. *Heart* I just wish this clip played the intro of the song, where the lead singer interviews his mom over the phone and asks her to find a word that rhymes with vagina.

*Bullet**Check* Crazy start to this Sabres game...if the pucks were going into the net earlier in the season the way they have tonight, just a couple of times, we wouldn't be fighting for our playoff lives. Then again, hard work around the net and playing the system will lead to getting some breaks and favorable puck bounces.

*Football* Word broke yesterday that the Buffalo Bills were actively persuing perhaps the best defensive free agent on the market, Mario Williams. Whatever they're doing, they need to sign him! If he leaves town, forget it. Nice job in keeping him in town so far, but don't let him leave without signing on the dotted line!

Ok, I'm getting out of here for the night. Might creep on some of you in a little bit...gonna see how the game goes. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjduYvD0-0U
March 13, 2012 at 11:48pm
March 13, 2012 at 11:48pm
#748891
THE PROMPT: "I Want to Brag A Minute."

What is up, everybody? Not much here. Kicked it around the house for awhile then trekked off to work for a pretty quite evening. All is good around here.

Now, for something to say to the prompt...see, I'm not really the bragging type. I feel embarrassment for fools who feel that they have to tell you about their accomplishments, as if they don't already speak for themselves (or maybe should've even be spoken of at all). That's not to say I consider myself humble. I'm outspoken at times, and sometimes also misunderstood, but I'm also not comfortable with tooting my own horn. It's much more satisfying when somebody else toots it for me. *Smirk*

I guess I just choose not to brag about some things because they seem so obvious to so many people, but they're less obvious to me. Or maybe you don't need me to remind you what you already know. I could tell you I'm such a great writer and that this patch of internet fodder is amazing, and some will agree, even though I know it needs work and is far from perfect and will never be loved by more than 95% of the blogging community...in fact, I know the minute I start believing it, I'll start churning out garbage after garbage entry, and that's all the haters need to feel like they have to knock me down a few pegs. Besides, I've got the awards and ratings and views and "likes" and comments on Facebook, and that's all validation I really need to prove that people like what I do, and everything else is icing on my internet cake. In fact, I just passed 5,000 views the other day, and it didn't even regester to me. It was phenomenal, until I hit 5,100 today. And that might mean nothing to someone who's kept the same blog for years and has tons of thousands of views, but maybe it's an inspiration to those just starting out. I don't know.

I do know a few things though. People who brag can be considered cocky, and I've been accused of that before, whether rightly so or not. Sometimes it's just the way people come across that make them seem cocky or arrogant. Sometimes it's true, and othertimes they're shallow and see-through anyway, even before they open their mouth. All I can really share? It ain't bein' cocky if you can back it up.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

A lot of Hip Hop music's roots were based in simple, "battle"-style rhymes that included a lot of bragging. That was the standard back in the day, before it got political, corporate, and white.

I'm bummed that this band was supposed to come play a show here in a few weeks, but I just found out it's been cancelled. I missed them last year when they played here, and to my knowledge it had been over 20 years since they last played a show in Buffalo. They eventually became known for their political bent, and later on for their hype-man's reality tv exploits, but this track from their first album ('87) is still one of my favorites. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AjVMetSjEUU

You have to appreciate the braggadoccio in these rhymes, if only for the humor. C'mon, admit you dance a little and giggle when you hear it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cj9_yW8tZxs

VITAL STATS:

*Bullet**Check* Ok, ok. I'll crack. I used to be a pretty decent floor hockey shut-down, stay-at-home defenseman. I have a YMCA championship trophy. That year, I held the league's best scorer in check during the championship game and had a pivotal clearing pass that went almost the length of the floor that lead to a breakaway goal that padded our lead. The next year, I took a stick in the mouth while going down to block a shot, missed the end of the first and all of the second periods icing my face, came back a few minutes into the third, and had a goal and two assists. I could hold my own between the pipes too, playing goal when necessary and doing pretty well for the most part.

*Music2* My iPod is way cooler than yours. It can beat up yours on the playground. It has 14,268 songs on it. "Say something about this post."

And I'm done. No more boasting out of this kid, who goes by "Photo Jesus" at work for his once-famed ability to fix anything that went wrong in the photo lab with minimal help. Now all I do is snipe promotional monies and get busy in the lab when I fill in. people gravitate toward me when I'm behind that counter covering real photo people's luches and breaks. I'm money in the lab. But for now, I'm gonna gravitate toward some sleep and hope that I'm money in dreamland, so that I can be money at life tomorrow. That, we shall see. Til then, peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bqod_4LPkw8
March 12, 2012 at 6:21pm
March 12, 2012 at 6:21pm
#748818
THE PROMPT: "Write 200 Words on a World-Wide Issue."

Good afternoon, fancy people. After a day of housework semi-completed, I don't feel as though I care much about World-Wide issues. Allow me a moment to research and/or drum up some kind of support for some kind of issue I can get behind.

Hunger was an issue I addressed in a previous run of the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS. Far be it from me to repeat myself. Can I get another minute here with this? Please and thank you.

OK. It's a rare day when I have no issues. I did some housecleaning. I picked up a few things on the lawn. I was productive on a day off that justjessica1 figured I'd be spending a day getting drunk and watching online porn. The nerve! I even made the friggin' bed...and I rarely do that!

So world-wide issues, yeah? 200 words? Ugh. I can poop out 200 words like reality TV stars look ridiculous. Truth is, I'm not like the Untied States. World issues don't faze me. I could care, but it just seems like all of my concern goes for naught. It feels like no matter how I feel, my concerns are of no avail to the cause. I support gay marriage, but that's controlled by the states. I support medicinal marijuana, but that too is so regulated (as it should be, for the right reasons). This makes me neither gay nor a stoner. I'm just a regular guy getting behind what I believe in. And I believe these things are ok. Whether it's ok or not ok for you, they're ok in my book. And having that opinion doesn't make me any less of a person, so save your hate for something more detestable. Like priests raping altar boys, or "Jersey Shore".

I'm not even going to count words. I believe I surpassed 200. And if I didn't, then I will raise that as a world-wide issue. Limiting me, constraining me, and penalizing me for being over or under, well, that's just dumb. You never know what's going to come out of me in these situations.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I guess this is appropriate, as this can also be seen as an issue and an epidemic. I remember first seeing this, and feeling like, "Holy shit, these guys are back! Old, weathered, and still blistering. I'll take it! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3y0yZpmKw6s

And this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q9oiXiMXrqw&feature=related

VITAL STATS:

*Cart* So I awake to a text from G-Stamm this morning, fresh on the scene at work on my day off. He's selling an MDA Shamrock, and a girl is pondering whether or not to put her last name on the shamrock. Her mom's like, "No!", but she's like, "Mom, some weirdo signed one 'Photo Jesus'!". That would be my purchased shamrock, folks. Because there is only one way, and it is the way.

*Bullet**Check* Sabres hockey in less than an hour, against the blown-up Habs of Montreal.I love dinner-and-hockey nights. Chicken breaded in a mix of mustard and crushed up crunchy fried onions. I'm excited for this. *Delight* I shall be slicing my chicken up and dipping it in Weber's horseradish mustard. That, my friends, is a good day, no matter what.

*Frown* Just learned what is being developed on the corner of the intersection two blocks from my house. Speculation was rampant...were they building a new bank? A new gas station? A tiny strip plaza? A Subway? A Mighty Taco? I can't even tell you how excited I would be that they would be building a new Mighty Taco that I could walk to? Well, I can't even begin to describe how disappointed I am that it's going to be a (totally unnecessary) Subway, and not a Mighty Taco.

And that's all for today, folks. Let's see what the rest of the week brings. Hope it's all good news. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GG35pJHAuDU&feature=related
March 11, 2012 at 6:57pm
March 11, 2012 at 6:57pm
#748776
THE PROMPT: "DISCUSS SOMEONE ELSE'S BLOG ENTRY"

A good late-afternoon to all of you fine folks out there! It's another lazy Sunday around these parts. A good time for catching up and redecorating! Courtesy of my twin, Julie D - PUBLISHED! , I've got a new, important piece of artwork up there in the intro section*Up*. That's pretty special and it means a lot to me.

But enough about me for a day, right? Let's explore the prompt. He's a man who lives in the Canada of your soul. His brand of humour is unique and unlike others I've come across. He is a man of fairness and principle. He exhibited a fresh taste of wit during recent runs of the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS. And he's a gamer...if WDC had a hockey team, I'd want him on my line. Ladies and gentlemen, please give it up for Brother Nature !

I'm naming this my "Entry Of The Week" because, well, it's funny. The way Joel spins his ideas into words just keeps me coming back for more. "Invalid Entry is a classic example of his work. I like how he thinks. I think Joel's going to have a lot of success in the game of blogging. Every entry seems to be something else you'd never expect. I hope anyone who reads this takes the time to check out some of Funk Joel Brother's other entries as well (I think I called him that the first time he read me...I hope he doesn't mind). He's not polished, but that's why he's on WDC...not that he needs much polishing anyway. The way he writes works. He's a promising member of the community, and I'm honored to have the opportunity to share him with you.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

No other reason to use this song but for this entry...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FMrIy9zm7QY

VITAL STATS:

*Bullet**Check* Helluva Sabres game last night! When we last crossed paths Gerbe had scored to tie it at one-all. By the end of the night, the Sens squandered two more one-goal leads and the Sabres finished them off in a shootout. A character victory for this team. Can't wait for tomorrow's game against Montreal! *Delight*

*Confused* Jess had to be at some gathering about some new business venture through a mutual friend at 1pm. It's almost 7pm. I'm thinking it might be a cult or something. I thought about texting her to ask how much money she was spending, but then I figured that would cut into my alone-time. And lo and behold, the moment I commit my thoughts to the internet "add text" box, she walks in. And she's gonna wanna talk. And I'm not gonna wanna listen. But I will. Because I'm nice that way.

So with that, I better get the hell outta here, post up, and get ready to hear a lot of stuff I don't wanna hear. You hear me, folks? I think you do. So go on elsewhere and get some peace, some love, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ex1qzIggZnA&NR=1&feature=endscreen
March 10, 2012 at 8:32pm
March 10, 2012 at 8:32pm
#748727
THE PROMPT: "HOW WAS YOUR DAY? WHAT HAPPENED?"

Good evening fine readers of minimal talent. I hope everyone's had a pretty good day so far. As far as you may figure, mine might sound exciting. I can, with full confidence, disclose that that was definitely not the case. Interesting? Maybe. I can fully assure you that by 10:30am I was very pissed off and ready to walk out on the job today. I don't want to blame it on the "vacation mentality"...I've got the next two days off, but I wasn't looking past my tasks today at being able to relax for awhile. It wasn't like that at all.

Saturdays are typically my "inventory" day. It's the pointless task of scanning my assigned departments where I have no product. If the system agrees that I have none on-hand, I order it. If the system disagrees, I have to go find it. If I don't find it, I have to then perform a function where I change the total for those items to "zero". Then I go and count a randomly chosen department and count everything that we have more than five of. Again, if the system agrees, I move on. If the system says I have more, I either find them or keep the count at the higher number. If the system says I have less, I increase the count to what I find. It's designed to keep inventory on the shelf but at a minimum, so we're not stuck with too much overstock. It's flawed. But that's my job...counting things that don't exist and ensuring we never have less than the system says, lest the system send us more. If it were an accounting job, I'd be in jail. Instead, I earn a paycheck. That's retail livin' for ya.

So I'm counting nothing and doing well at it in the detergent aisle when I hear a woman carrying on about something. I look up and she's turning in a circle toward her elderly mother, saying "I don't know how this happened! The top must have come off." She's holding a bottle of dish soap, shaking it in what seems to be a mini panic attack. As she's turning to try and face her oblivious mother, she's stepping in dish soap. Effin' great. And the curious part? She walked away without saying anything else to me, and there was no sign of a broken dish soap bottle anywhere. No way could she have bought it, because half of that bottle's contents were now on the floor.

So I went to the break room and grabbed a handy little product called Spill Magic (http://spillmagic.com/ie/index.html), which is an absorbant powdery substance that almost solidifies liquid spills. Stuff's pretty amazing. I laid it down, put up the wet floor sign, and went to the office while it soaked in for a sip of my coffee and a healthy rant about what just happened. I grabbed the broom to sweep it up, and- WTF?? Some moron drove their shopping cart right through my piles of Spill Magic/dish soap, leaving a cart wheel trail. Who does that? I shook my head.

As I was sweeping it up, from a few aisles over came a loud crash, then a woman saying "I'm sorry!" and then chuckling. It was damn near uncontrollable chuckling. Annoying chuckling. I shook my head again, and, still carrying my broom and dustpan, decided to give in to my curiosity. When I reach the beverage aisle, my jaw dropped. The broom and dustpan left my grip. I wanted to cry walk out and go home. I'll do my best to explain what I saw: A stream, about one foot wide, from the back end of the beverage aisle, going toward the front of the store. It ran the length of the aisle, petering out as it reached the photo lab. That's a good 20 feet, I'd say. Toward the end of the stream was an empty two-liter of cola, severely dented at the opening. This woman must have grabbed the 2L of Coke, which is at the end of the aisle, and then dropped it in such a way that it landed on its cap, which was shattered into pieces about halfway down the aisle, and the pressure of the carbonation propelled the bottle all the way down the aisle until it crashed up against the photo counter. Or, in layman's terms, it was a big fucking mess. The worst part? That I saw the lady who dropped it turn the corner with her cart and proceed to the checkout. An embarrassed "walk of shame"? Maybe, whatever, I don't care. Don't just yell "Sorry!" and book. Own your miscue and help us clean it up. It's not funny either, lady, so don't laugh.

Like I said, I dropped my clean-up stuff and just went back to the office. My voice was trembling as I explained what I just saw (pretty much the same way I explained it in the last paragraph). And of course, my boss and the assistant thought I was exaggerating, so the assistant came out and was pretty floored. There it was, the Coca~Cola stream, in all of its brown, sugary WTF'edness. The assistant was nice enough to mop that one up...but what the hell is wrong with people who blow right past a wet floor sign to go down an aisle that someone is clearly making a motion with a mop that would insinuate he's mopping the floor?? Who does that?? Why?? It's days like these that make me want to consider changing the title of this here nugget of internet tastiness from Who The Hell Do I Think I Am?? to Who The Frig Do These People Think They Are?!?

The assistant did make a good point: He returned to the office and said to our boss, "He's right. We had an active shooter in the store!" *Laugh* (You'll need to read yesterday's entry to get that joke, unless you already did.)

And you thought I was done there, didn't you? Ready for the MUSICAL BREAK!!, are ya? Well no friends, as the fun is just beginning!

My afternoon was spent counting the most neglected department of the store...the end where we keep all of the reader glasses. Nobody who's anybody, and that's errrryyybodyyy, cares about this rack. Nothing is hung in the right spot, and half the time glasses are just deposited on the base of the displayer by customers who have to try on eight pairs before finding one with the right style and magnification. It's an embarrassment. I didn't think it was possible, but I gave myself a fantastic headache while putting something like six different kinds of magnified lensed glasses in their correct places...it's a fair estimation to say that maybe 10% of the glasses were actually in the spot they belonged in. I barely was able to finish my work by my 4pm endtime.

I knew Jess was working 'til 4:30pm. I knew she had a little bit of a drive ahead of her. But I wasn't happy when she pulled up just after 5:30pm like it was no big deal. Two days in a row of this shit is too much...especially when the plan was to drop some girlie-party stuff off at her relatives' house, in a third-kind-of-opposite direction before going home. Nope. Not me. I just wanted to go home. Aaaannnnddd.... she was supposed to go to a few other stores to transfer product. Yup, I'll take the one-way ticket home, and you can do all that. I'm done for the day.

At least I'm getting Mighty Taco while she's out. If there's a silver lining to be found, Mighty is the place that always comes through. http://www.mightytaco.com/main.php

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Appropriate. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gAYL5H46QnQ

VITAL STATS:

*Smile* Hi, Jess' relatives I didn't get to see earlier today! Miss you guys!

*Bullet**Check* Sabres are down 1-0 about halfway through the 2nd in Ottawa. Decent game so far, but this team isn't scoring and is missing top scorer Thomas Vanek. But Nathan Gerbe just tied it!! Whoooo hooo! This team really does scare me though in the 3rd period...they've seemed to run out of gas lately in toward the end of the last few games. Not good for a team looking up at the playoffs in the standing.

Alright, I'm out. I'm all set here, thanks. Feel free to leave a few words of "WTF Dude!" down below wherever it is you came across this. One thing I can guarantee in life: tomorrow will be a better day, because I do not have to work. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rSCO9fuzlec
March 9, 2012 at 9:49pm
March 9, 2012 at 9:49pm
#748680
THE PROMPT: "HOW WAS YOUR DAY? WHAT HAPPENED?"

Good evening everyone! I hope everyone had a fantastic day...or at least a more fantastic one than I had. It wasn't bad, but it was boring.

Even work wasn't all that exciting. My boss was in and out of the store all day, so I was running the shop. The weather was pretty crappy, so that usually means only the crazies come out. Nope, not today. The snow must've been just enough to keep those folks away too. Most of 'em, at least.

I did learn a little more about a new training tool being implemented in all of our stores. The store managers had a conference call about it yesterday, and today the materials for training showed up in my boss' email. I was fortunate enough to be in the office at the time she was looking at it...it was kinda like a PowerPoint, "read this and click next" kinda thing. And I swear to God, even on my imagination's most hyperactive days, I couldn't make this shit up. I'll share with you the gist of it.

TOPIC: WHAT TO DO WHEN THERE IS AN ACTIVE SHOOTER IN YOUR STORE

Run and try to leave the store.

If you can't leave, hide or take cover somewhere safe and away from the shooter.

As a last resort, you may attempt to engage the shooter by yelling loudly at the shooter and/or throwing things at the shooter in an attempt to distract the shooter and separate the shooter from the gun.


Uhhhh, wait a second. So, the managers were pulled off the sales floor for an hour...to take a conference call...on what to do when a freaking lunatic with an assault rifle shows up and starts decorating the aisles with lead? And you need to freaking tell us what to do? Pardon my French, but if that does happen in my store, I'm getting the fuck outta Dodge. I love my co-workers, and I'm a decent person and all, but this cat's not takin' a bullet for his job, his company or anyone else in the store. But I do kinda like the idea of throwing things at the shooter...maybe anything I can find on my way out would end up in the air. What I'm really thinking though, is if fleeing and taking cover don't work, you're fucked...with a capital D.O.A.

Yeah, that was the extent of my workday excitement. That, and getting out of work at 3:30, only to wait until 5:30 for Jess to pick me up. If you read yesterday's entry, you'll understand when I say "Thank God for newspapers". *Laugh*

That I had to wait wasn't really the annoying part. I got in the car and it was a struggle to determine our next move. Go home? Go out for dinner? Get take-out? Ugh. I had been snacking on the best snack ever invented only to be marked down by Walgreens, these things called Chip-Ins. They're chips made out of popcorn, and they're freakin' fantastic! White Cheddar Chip-Ins...I could eat them like a meal. Therefore, I was in no position to discuss dinner for a little while.

So we went home and changed, throwing out names of restaurants and bantering. We didn't have to worry about the boys, it was just us, we could go anywhere, blah blah blah. Jess gets her boots on and says "Well, I don't care. I've got comfy pants on now, and I'm going like this." They were these thin cottony, almost-sweatpants-but-not-quite, too-loose-to-be-tights kinda pants. I looked at her and told her I wouldn't take her to McDonalds looking like that.

We ended up at McDonalds. *Laugh*

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I definitely felt like this today, even if I did manage to get some work done. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZclddLcOYYA

VITAL STATS:

*Questionbl* #1 I understand I may not quite look my age, but why on Earth would a truck driver, after dropping off his shipment, refer to me as "Boy" when saying good-bye to me? He seemed pretty normal to me until that point. And then he busted out "Thanks, boy" as he was leaving. It rolled off his tounge like he was living in southern wilderness. As I was closing the door I was hoping he wouldn't try to creep back in and make me squeal like a pig. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9gLN3QoN-q8

*Questionbl* #2 I stopped at the gas station by my house on the way home for a pack of smokes, and the little teeny-bopper chicky behind the counter didn't ask me for my ID. Not usually a problem, and I'm not one of those who cares either way...I get it, I understand, it's your job to ask and I don't get offended if you don't because you think I'm old enough or whatever. But she asked me my age. And I'm not gonna lie...I was definitely unprepared for that question. Usually, if I'm not asked for ID, I'm asked for my date of birth. I totally took longer than the alotted time to tell her I was 36, and I really don't think she believed me.

*Headphones* I'm excited! At Jess' store, they marked down a bunch of Sony headphones really cheap, so she picked me up a pair. The audiophile in me is a little disappointed in the noise-cancelling, but the sound quality so far has been very impressive. I'm just feeling awesome that I have a new set of cans for my ears *Delight*. See, when I'm out and about, I like the slim, discreet, behind-the-back-of-the-head headphones or the clip-over-the-ear style as opposed to ear buds. But if I'm at home bangin' away on the computer while people are watching tv, I like a big, old-school pair of headphones cushioning up against my ears, and these are a definite upgrade over my other pair that I think I paid $3 for. I'm not bothering anyone, and no one's bothering me. And that, my friends, is what we call "balance". *Smile*

And with that, me and my boring day are gonna go elsewhere. Thanks for making me a part of yours...peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GKlDBi0cyIA
March 8, 2012 at 7:37pm
March 8, 2012 at 7:37pm
#748596
THE PROMPT: "Newspapers and How I Would Change Them."

What's up everybody? Interesting subject we've got going on here today, considering that I'm still a holdover from what appears to be soon a bygone era. I still buy a newspaper every day. I even manage to read probably 80% of its stories also. In this day and age, given the way the internet allows us to disseminate information in such instant and immediate basis, I still think it's classier to have that paper in my hand. The smell of newsprint...the way the ink rubs off on your fingers...it's more tangible, even if I could've read the same story 12 hours earlier on http://www.buffalonews.com/. The layout of the physical copy of The Buffalo News seems much simpler to me, and I know my way around a computer. Sometimes websites just throw a bunch of links on a page, and you have to hope what you're clicking is going to take you to where you want to go (and hopefully that's not to some ad/scam that raids your defenseless bank account). With the paper, I can pull out the section I want and read the stories that interest me. They're all there in front of you...not just the titles, but the whole article. And if I don't care for the article? I stop reading it and scan the page for another one, as opposed to clicking on a title, realizing it wasn't what I wanted, clicking back, and clicking another article. Too much clicking for me.

Are there other benefits to having an actual piece of printed journalism in your hands as opposed to buying internet access in order to view a digital copy of events and happenings? Sure! For one, I can do the crosswords and words games and Sudoku, and all I need to have is a pen. Sure, some newspaper websites offer "digital" versions of these games, but that takes the fun out of them, and some aren't as challenging as some of the crosswords in my paper. Another benefit? A newspaper is very easily recycled. When I'm done with it, it goes into the bin with the rest of the stuff we've consumed during the week that features recyclable packaging, which gets placed out to the curb on Mondays for a Tuesday pick-up. Ever try recycling a computer? It's a pain in the ass...you have to wait for someone to hold an "Electronics Recycling Day", you have to find the obscure location it's being held at, and hope they don't charge you some weird disposal fee. See? Another +1 for the print industry!

Now, as far as changing the newspaper, let me fill you in on something. I'm a lazy person...I'm not gonna lie about that. There are two things in life that are often necessary, and they're possibly the two things I despise more than most of these "necessities": shaving, and cleaning the bathroom. And oftentimes, the first one often leads to the second one. See, I shave at the most maybe once or twice a month, and I can grow some pretty impressively massive facial hair. So much so that I have to use electric clippers to trim it down...and those clippers don't discriminate when they decide where to throw the shorn hair. That means facial hair all over the bathroom sink, and that's a displeasure to the other members of the house who would prefer to use a clean sink area. My solution to this disruptance of my life when an added cleaning of the bathroom is warranted due to the cleaning of my facial area? Before I shave, I lay newspaper down all over the sink area. I cover the soap, the combs and brushes, the toothbrushes, the hair sprays and gels, and all the fancy stuffs one justjessica1 uses to enhance her look and smell. Now, how do I change that when I'm done? I start in one corner, rolling up the paper toward the center and trapping the hair in it, and while holding the center down with one hand, I roll up each additional corner until I have a large ball of newspaper, and then I throw it out (cuz there's almost no sense in coming up with anything my ex-beard could possibly be recycled in) by lifting the garbage can under the sink up as close to the edge, as not to spill any loose hairs. And if I miss a spot and need to run over my face once more with the clippers, I just lay down a few more sheets. Quick, easy, no mess, and I look good. And so does the rest of the bathroom! I can clean everything else another day!. *Thumbsup*

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Ahh, I read the news today, oh boy... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xljFT44Y1Y

VITAL STATS:

*Delight* Ohhhh, happy day! I'm awaiting the return of Jess with our dinner: http://www.buffalonews.com/business/article752948.ece Yup, I'm gonna eat that, probably as soon as I hit "save entry" on this.

*Bullet**Check* After WDC gets that hockey emoticon up and going, can we get a taco emoticon? Please? Pleeeease? And while I've got that pseudo-emoticon up, the Sabres are at Boston for the first time since that Lucic scumbag took out Ryan Miller. Coincidentally, Miller's not playing tonight since he's had a string of consecutive games played recently. Hopefully the Sabres play as well as they've played recently...hopefully.

*Cart* Somedays, it's a pain in the balls being the "manager on duty" at a pharmacy, and some days it's more like a papercut on the inside of your lip. Typically, the store manager oversee the retail part of the sales floor, and the pharmacist is in charge of everything behind the pharmacy counter. See, there's too many things going on in that pharmacy that a manager just shouldn't have to deal with, and vice versa for the pharmacist. So I get called over to the pharmacy for a customer service issue. No big deal...it's a elderly lady. She immediately tells me she "does business at another pharmacy" and would like me to explain to her how she should "go about having her scripts sent to this location". Information I know not a damn thing about. I'm sure it's not hard and all, but really, that's not my job. I tell this woman I don't really know much about it, and she spits back, "Well, you're the store manager! Don't you know what goes on in the store?" (And I'm not really the store manager, soooo...) "Yes, I do, on the sales floor. I'm not a trained pharmacy worker though, so you probably don't want me talking to you about anything related to the pills, scripts and anything else going on back there." Grabbed the pharmacist, and end scene.

And lo and behold, dinner's here and my belly's ready, so I'm gonna get outta here. Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SIt2CdbBo_w
March 7, 2012 at 7:30pm
March 7, 2012 at 7:30pm
#748541
THE PROMPT: "Tell us about your mountain experiences. Holidays? Dreams? Plans?"

Good evening everyone! Well, it was bound to happen (although I'm surprised I made it this long)...finally, I've run up against a prompt that I don't particularily care for. No big deal though. Being the "complaining male" that I am, it seems like some of my best entries come from the worst prompts. But this one isn't as bad as some I've seen in recent months. It's just that it really has nothing to do with me and I don't have much to offer it.

So here's where I deviate from the masses with this entry. I'm not much of a hiker anymore. Hell, I don't even live near any kind of mountains to my knowledge. Let me finish running down the list...Holidays? Those presidents on Mt. Rushmore give the kids an entire week off of school...when I went to school we had off for Lincoln's and Washington's birthday, until they consolidated them into one catch-all "Presidents Day", and now kids get a whole freakin' week off? Children these days are spoiled. Dreams? I seldom remember them, so that's out...and even if I did remember them, they're never about mountains. And plans? Plans? My backyard isn't very big, so I have no plans on building a mountain anytime soon. Even more unlikely are plans on vacationing on a mountain, climbing a mountain, unclimbing a mountain, and mounting anything more than my ass on my computer chair.

So no, I don't do mountains. Unless...

MOUNTAIN DEW!!

Ahhh, pure, sweet, yellow-green liquidy carbonated confection, how much do I love thee? Those of you who read my previous attempts at this internet web-logging craze, "I'm Studying You, will be very familiar with my love of the stuff. That was my drug of choice...part of my excuse for taking a gander at justjessica1. I could pass by no less than six closer places in a short walk just to have her cash me out for one.

Say what you will, haters. Say you don't like its citrusy wonderfulness. Tell me it looks like pee pee. Complain that it's too sugary. I don't want to hear it. And you Mountain Dew Code Red fans can stuff a sock in it too, cuz that stuff's plain nasty. And while I will love the orange-flavored Livewire always, it's too hard to find (unless you know people in the industry *Wink*). Mountain Dew Amp? It's not the same anymore since they got away from the tiny cans that you could just throw down like it was a shot of Crown Royal. The "Big Rig" concept of Amp was nice, but two of those in a day was enough to induce tremors, heart palpitations, and slight hallucinations. And if anyone mentions "diet" and any kind of soda in the same sentence, I might just puke.

So that said, there is but one original. The beverage I once referred to as Saint Dew. That, kind readers, is the extent of my experience with mountains.

** Image ID #1443833 Unavailable **

MUSICAL BREAK!!

Not sure if there's any odes out there to the great Mt. Dew. These might be the best I can do tonight...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Vvs1N1wVeU

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7v2GDbEmjGE&ob=av2e

VITAL STATS:

*Laugh**Cart* Not once, but twice today, did my boss call me into the office, only to say inappropriate things that only her and I would find funny. Well, I'm sure other people would find them funny too, but most of you would say we're either very childish, disgusting, or both. And you'd probably be right. *Smirk*

*Bullet**Check* How is it that the Sabres can skate with the top teams in the league, and beat them, but struggle against teams just as good or below them in the standings? How does that work" *Confused*

Alrightey...it's salami sandwich time over here cuz I'm starving and the lady of the house has her ladyfriend over, waking her up in the middle of her nap, which means all thoughts of dinner are nil. And I'm ok with that. You all go on and enjoy your night and stuff...thanks for your time! Peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dIgey9NLdhk
March 7, 2012 at 1:07am
March 7, 2012 at 1:07am
#748486
THE PROMPT: “If you could speak to anyone alive or dead throughout history who would you choose and why?”

Good evening everyone! It's been a lousy night at work, so I'm ready to take my mind off it by fantacizing a little...

So, do I have to pick just one person, or can I have a roundtable? Cuz honestly, I could be asked this same question everyday for a month and give you 30-31 different answers depending on the month (excluding February, the red-headed stepchild of months).

Tell ya what, good people...I'll break it down to literature, music and sports. Me and three others, havin' a few beers at the bar talkin' about what they want to talk about: themselves.

MUSIC: Eddie Vedder, singer/guitarist for Pearl Jam; Thom Yorke, singer/guitarist for Radiohead; John Lennon, LEGEND.

I would love to hear how Eddie keeps coming up with phenomenal lyrics, and would enjoy hearing him in person tell his story of how he came together with the other members of the band to form Pearl Jam (I know it's already lore and legend, and it's also on the Pearl Jam Twenty documentary, but c'mon, who wouldn't want to hear that in person?).

Thom Yorke would just be a riot, I think. I'd want to know what goes into the creative process of making a Radiohead song. I'd want him to teach me to dance as weirdly as he does. I'd also want to know how he crafts his lyrics...he was very influential on me at one point when I was writing a lot more.

And John Lennon? Who wouldn't want to pick his brain? I mean, really? When you get the chance to have John Lennon at your get-together, you don't say anything else but "Dude, c'mon!" Imagine (no pun intended) if he and George Harrison were still alive...you know the Beatles would've reunited by now for sure.

SPORTS: Marv Levy, who coached the Buffalo Bills when they were great; Gilbert Perreault, Sabres legend; Larry Felser, former sports editor of the Buffalo News and AFL historian.

Marv Levy coached some of the most talented teams in Buffalo history. He did it in an era where the athlete was becoming bigger than the game itself. How did he manage all of those egos? How did he motivate them to get them working at such a high level? And why did he do those Coors Light commercials? *Laugh*

#11, Gil Perreault. The centre of the French Connection. The greatest Sabre player not named "Hasek" ever (and that might be the greatest debate in all of Buffalo's rich sporting history..."Who's better, Hasek or Perreault?"). The only player to score at least 500 goals in the Blue and Gold. I'd want to know what it was like playing in the '70's and '80's and his thoughts on the landscape of hockey now. I might be curious as to why he tried a brief singing career also. *Confused*

Larry Felser...I grew up reading his columns in the news. He was intelligent, articulate, and well-versed in his analysis. I loved sports less from playing them and more from reading his takes, which made me love to play even more. I have a couple of his books, but he would be the napkin ring at that table with Levy and Perreault (thanks to justjessica1 for the answer when I asked her what that thing was that they put around rolled napkins).

LITERATURE: Jack Kerouac, poet and novelist; Saul Williams, poet and musician; Richard Brautigan, poet.

Kerouac's an icon. 'Nuff said. Just to hear him rattling off tales of his journeys would be worth giving up half of the next day to the night before.

Saul Williams is the best kind of challenging read. Everyone should go out and get a copy of , Said The Shotgun To The Head. It's a beautiful, quick read about love in these times. The imagery in the poetry is beautiful and stunning all at once. It's the best kind of confrontation poetry can produce.

A friend of mine turned me on to Richard Brautigan. He was an old soul with a definite flair for the weird and obscure. I would start with In Watermelon Sugar and go from there. His works are hard to find these days, but they're very satisfying. The Hawkline Monster is a wonderful novel, and Trout Fishing In America is another great series of stories. He was truly ahead of his time. I'd really want to know what propelled him to create his brand of magic with words.

So there's my lists of dinner party guests. And there's so many more who didn't make tonight's cut. Ask me again tomorrow and you'll get a totally different list, I swear.

MUSICAL BREAK!!

I'd ask Thom Yorke the secret behind this video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-_qMagfZtv8&ob=av2e

I'd ponder Jack Kerouac's thoughts about this, which was written as part of a soundtrack for a movie about him: {http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7bnakJc03OE}

VITAL STATS:

Ugh, it's been such a crappy day. The anticipation of going back to work, the slow night at the shop, and then everything going to hell at the end. I'll be dead of an ulcer by Friday; I can see it coming. Nothing funny and nobody's bullshit stupidity to promote, so Imma leave you there and hope I can get to bed at a decent hour. Priorities, ya know? And they're a mess too! GOODNIGHT NOW!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mNCaGTCOdd8

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