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 |   A little bit of everything, colored my own way. |
 BLOG CHALLENGE WINNER FOR SEPTEMBER 2011 AND APRIL 2012!! ** Image ID #1901871 Unavailable **  After almost a year away, I've decided to revisit Blogville. I'm refreshed and ready...this time around it'll be a little different. I'll talk about a little bit of everything...music, sports, retail life, and more. It's not for everyone...you might not like it, but someone you know (and possibly detest) probably will! WHO THE HELL DO I THINK I AM??  We're gonna find out one way or another!  Relax, enjoy, leave a comment, tell your friends... A special thanks to Julie D - PUBLISHED!  for the 2011 Quill Awards image!"There is only one way...it is THE WAY." -Photo Jesus  "Can't you count to one??"  Thanks for stopping by and showing your support!  |
| THE PROMPT: "We’re all afraid of something. Write a formal complaint to whatever scares you the most." Good evening everyone...thanks for dropping by. As you can see, we've got an interesting prompt tonight. Unless you're me of course, and have to find the counter-point in everything. If you know me, you know that, and also, you know that I'm generally pretty fearless (my injury history when compared against my actual physical size is a testament not only to that, by to also my general sense of occasional stupidity). I'm the guy Chuck Norris consults when he faces his greatest fear, which probably goes something like "I'm afraid I have nothing to fear. What do I do?" That said, I am still a man with fear. But my fears are mainly of the emotional kind. I fear things like abandonment and depression, because I've lived through them and I know what that's like. Or maybe I'm more afraid of the feelings those things leave behind. I'm not sure. I fear crazy yet common things, like suffering through a car accident and dying days later while in a ton of pain, or dying in my sleep while my house burns down. But maybe that's just a fear of dying, which I really don't have because if I died doing something I enjoyed, hell, I'd die happy (even if I did suffer a little toward the end). So that's out of the conversation. Anyway, since this prompt is about writing a complaint (two of the things I feel might be my best attributes...writing and complaining), allow me to formally insult my biggest fear (and probably my harshest reality)...Growing Old Ungracefully, as brought to you by the 76-year-old me. Ya know what? You can have the hair, old age. I could never find a style I felt I could live this long with anyway, so turn it gray if you must, or hell, why not take it all anyway? I can accessorize my head some other way. You can take my muscles and replace them with pain too. I saw that one comin' a mile away, given the way I've abused this temple. Sex drive? Don't even need it. All the girls women my age have been ruined by menopause, and even if I could get it up, it'd be like floating a deflating raft into a hot tub with that lost most of its water. And while you're at it, take my damn friends too. The Senior Center's a joke (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Adgx9wt63NY&ob=av2e) and it's just as bad as high school, what with the old lady cliques and their gossip, and the jocks still looking like they could throw a football 60 yards just by sticking out their square jaws and smiling. All these diseases going around, the cancer, the hiv, the di-a-beat-is (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ILIvPzyK_8I), ya can't take me out with that, but just give it to everyone else so I can be the last guy at the party to go to sleep just so no one wrecks my shit or draws a pecker on my face while I sleep. My teeth? They'll gimme fake ones. But I'mma tell you sons-a-bitches one thing, and one thing only... While you haven't taken my sanity (cuz clearly I was never given any when they was passin' it out with the free cheese in the eighties), there is one thing you will not take from me...my conscience. I may have done many unconscionable things in my years, but you're not gonna take away my mental capacity. I don't care if I was five years old or it happened 5 minutes ago...I'm gonna remember it, dammit. You're gonna let a tree fall on me, or strike me with lightning, or drown in a horrific hip-breaking shower fall before you think I'm ever gonna let you rob me of my mental stability. You got that? Do ya? DO YA? I think you do.  Now, about this uncontrollable bowel movement situation. I can deal with a random shart maybe once a year or two if I'm queasy, but this either needs to end, or you need to end me, cuz there isn't a soul alive I could or would pay to wipe my ass for me and actually clean that shit up. If this is how it's gonna be, don't let me see my 77th birthday. Just put one of them pillows over my head while I'm sleeping that's soaked in the poly-phosphor-chemical kinda stuff, I forget what they call it. AND NO, I'm not losing my mind because I can't remember what the damn thing is called!! MUSICAL BREAK!! Apparently, I've written myself into this type of person, which is indeed very likely: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MkI-SF3ieSM&feature=fvst And I'm ok with that. I'll either be the dirty old man, or the miserable old man. So, let's mellow this out a little bit before I get into the real meat of this entry, since I feel as though I've satisfied the prompt portion somewhat... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h3chFhCP5mQ VITAL STATS: Let's file this under the category of "Retail Genious Moves That I Wish I Would've Thought Of Years Ago"...so at work we're in the process of boxing up all of the Christmas merchandise and making room for Valentine's Day candy and gifts. This year, the last six feet of "gift" merchandise is considered the "Romance Gifts" section. It's supposed to feature gift sets with champagne flutes and fake rose petals, along with candles, fake roses, handcuffs, a large K-Y Jelly display of "his and her" lubes and it's completed with a clip-strip of Trojan condoms. Justin Timberlake's got nothin' on Walgreens bringin' sexy back. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O9REMmhvjQw I wonder, since it took so long for any retailer to incorporate such a big amount of sex into the Valentine's retail landscape, what do you think will happen when the whole gay marriage thing finally becomes socially acceptable? Am I going to have to set a "Bromance" section for Valentine's Day? Will K-Y be promoting a "Yours and Yours" or "Mine and Mine" lube instead of the "Yours and Mine" label they're pushing? Will we be selling fancy panties to go along with the boxers? Oh wait, we already do that. Overheard from a customer on the other side of the Valentine's aisle while I was boxing up the remains of Christmas merch: "Valentine's Day (crap) already? Jeez, ridiculous." I apologize to you, you hideously disgusting and unloved middle-aged white trash pile of filth, but we didn't get any Martin Luther King Jr. Day decorations in this year, so you'll have to suffer through the hearts and stuff. But check back soon...maybe by February 15th we'll have all of the Presidents' Day chocolates and decor ready! I swear, in 20 years, I might not have to worry about dying. You've heard me make the comment before about how our Christmas merch has so much glitter that it won't wash out 'til Easter, no? Well, I'm fairly certain I'll be getting a letter in 20 years about a class-action lawsuit against Walgreens by former employees who had to touch merchandise in 2012 that was made in China, and now they have spots on their lungs from all of the glitter that they either inadvertantly inhadled, or was washed through their skin and has coagulated near an artery. If I'm lucky, I'll get a $60 check for my pain and suffering. And when I die, I will combust like a glitter-filled pinata beaten by the fattest kid with the hardest swing, but is too slow to drop the stick and actually get the candy. This actually scares me that there are people in society that will do this, but it's maybe the funniest and bizzare thing I've heard in quite a long time. Basically, this drunk woman punched and scratched an expensive piece of art, rubbed her naked butt up against it, passed out and pissed herself. I don't even know where to go with that one. Wow. http://www.denverpost.com/news/ci_19677478?source=rssAnd with that, I better get out of here. Gots to be up before the rooster tomorrow, so I'm gonna hit the shower, catch a little wreck on Facebook, and go on my merry way. GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ApgUXeNU3oI&feature=related |
| THE PROMPT: "In 200 words or more, write a post about a world-wide issue that you feel needs support." Ugh. Oh boy. That was my initial response when I saw this prompt. I'll never claim to be overly-knowledgable about the state of the world. Let's get that out of the way. Sure, I still read an actual print newspaper on a daily basis, but I usually skip the first (national) section unless something really catches my eye and piques my interest. I generally head to the sports section, followed by the local section. If time permits, I'll read the entertainment section. I guess the only way I find out anything about what's going on halfway across the planet is if MSN.com has any interesting stories...and even then, I usually read the headlines. I probably know more of what's going on around the world from people who really care...on Facebook.  So call it a cop-out, call it "skirting the issue/prompt", say what you will, but here's where I'm going. Global hunger and famine. Not a really big problem in the United States, but we're a country that tends to believe if another country has problems, it's our problem too. **Looks at Haiti and Japan**...you're welcome! Seriously though, there's plenty of people in poor countries who don't eat. No matter how much we try to assist them on a national level, there's still gonna be people in other countries that we can't reach. Maybe it's a grand-scale case of there being too many mouths to feed, and not enough food going around. Sorta like the Occupy movements, but replacing the money with food. I'm not asking you to send your leftovers to Egypt. I would never suggest you sponsor a kid like on those creepy UNICEF commercials (don't mind the blatant overuse of the eff word...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GePMpDjrubg) . I can't even suggest a way to solve this problem. But I can suggest starting on a local level. Look in your pantry, or, if you're not 97 years old and either straight from Poland or Italy like my great-grandmothers, your kitchen cabinets. You know, the ones you keep the food in. You know there's shit in there from 6 years ago that, even if it's still outdated, back then they put so many preservatives in it, it'll probably last longer than you anyway. And the truly hungry people? They're not gonna mind if it expired during Operation Desert Storm in the nineties. Oh no. They're gonna be happy they can put something different (if anything) on the dinner table. So maybe you've got a can or two in your cupboard that everyone in the house jokes about, but never eats. For us, it's a can of mixed vegetables with some label on it that I've never seen in stores. Not the major grocery stores, not the deep-discount grocery stores, not the big-box retailers with expanded grocery sections...nowhere. And maybe you've got a box of Rice-A-Roni in there too that you bought when it was on sale 4/$5, but decided the San Franciscans can keep their treats. Maybe it's just some pudding or Jello. So you clear it out, put it in a bag, and take it to the local food pantry. Cuz even though you're still livin' in the mighty United States, there's probably people in your own neighborhood that can't put together a dinner without struggling. It happens...maybe there's an illness or an unforseen job loss. Circumstances happen...I know. Where else do you think that can of mixed veggies in our cupboard came from? There was a short time in my life where I had no income, couldn't qualify for any assistance, and still had to eat. Told the local pantry my plight and I walked out with a bag of food, which I was able to stretch out until the next time I was eligible. It wasn't gourmet by any means, but it got me by when I needed it. And your donation might help a neighbor. Ahhh, the "feel good blog entry" of the month! MUSICAL BREAK!! I just can't stop with the love!! I'll admit, I downloaded this from iTunes when it came out. What is it about celebrity tribute video gatherings like this, where all these rich, famous people look like they've either lost a loved one, about to cry, or crapped themselves? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Glny4jSciVI&ob=av3e VITAL STATS:  Am I the only one who thinks the USA takes better care and looks out more for other countries than they do for their own people? Just sayin'. Holy crap! Foursquare has just informed me that today was my 1,000th check-in! That's so....lame. For this momentous occasion, I've been offered 40% at https://www.foursquarestore.com. I didn't even know they had a store. Ok folks, the show's over for tonight. Move along toward better things to do for another 24 hours or so...I know I will. Take care of yourselves and each other, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYXiRun2jNY  |
| THE PROMPT: "When you are writing, do you prefer to use a pen or a computer?" Good evening everybody! I think this is a fairly straightforward question. Back in the day, when I first started writing, it was all by hand in notebooks, most of which I still have. Computers were primarily used for word processing, and we didn't have a computer anyway. Things changed for me however; over ten years ago I found out about this little website here. Because I spent so much more time online, it was natural to hit WDC whenever the urge struck me. Rather than write poetry by hand (and think and scribble, because I rarely would edit my thoughts) and then type it out, the text box on WDC became my blank page. Then all I had to do if I wanted backup of my work was print the page up, hit it with the three-hole punch, and snap it into a binder. I reversed my whole process, and it's worked out well. It's almost been like it's allowed me a little more creative freedom as well, outside of everything you can do with WritingML. Spell-checking and editing after I've composed a line or two are a lot nicer and neater, and I feel like I can keep up with my thoughts better than waiting from my hand to catch up with my head. I will, once in awhile, write in a notebook. I've always done that and it's comforting in a way, plus you can't always have access to a computer. Something about seeing a writer's ideas from his or her own hand is almost a romantic thing, I think. That "personalized touch", if you will. Sounds corny, but you'll have that. I actually don't mind talking about the general writing process...it's just weird when we get into personal aspects and approaches. That was a fun little prompt!  MUSICAL BREAK!! I love indie hip hop that's not at all about guns and women and cars and blingin'....this is a new song just released as a free download...I think a lot of writers can relate to the real message. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=06qWAClqh9I&feature=g-all-bul&context=G2b8d70fFAA... VITAL STATS:  And it was back to work for this cat today. It's always hard going back to work five days in a row after having practically three straight off. I know you're lookin' at that and sayin' that math don't add up fool; how do you live with eight days in a week? It's simple. Most weeks, I close Tuesday and open Wednesday through Saturday. Sometimes I'm out as early as two on a Saturday, and I don't go back until Tuesday afternoon at 2:30. So maybe it's more like two and a half days off in a row, but it's easier to round up and say three, even though I'm working five straight. See, I get it. And that's all that matters.  {e:STILL NO DAMN HOCKEY EMOTICON!!} Hold up a sec...gotta check the Sabres score. That's the one drawback to working Tuesday nights...there's usually a game on. And dammit, I missed a win for the blue and gold. But I'll take it. I suppose I could dvr the games I miss, but I hate that, because you know someone you know is gonna ruin the score for ya anyway, and on the close-to-open turnarounds, I really don't feel like sitting through old news. Dvr'ing sports isn't the same as dvr'ing a tv show or a movie. It's just not.  We've been very spoiled this winter...great temps and hardly any snow. Annnnnd wow has that changed in the last two days. We've still only had a mere few inches of snow that's actually managed to stick for more than a day, but really only because it's finally gotten cold enough for the snow to stay. Wait for it....wait for it...HOW COLD WAS IT? Anywhere for 10-15 degrees. And yup, I'm done with it. Anyone who knows anything about me knows that. There...I've complained about the weather once, and you won't hear another peep about it outta me until the first time it really snows...when we're talking feet instead of inches. Or, as the cool kids do, ' instead of ".Well, thanks for lettin' me kill a couple minutes of your day. We'll be back at it again tomorrow, only maybe a little earlier. I have some time of my own to kill and I'm gonna waste it as best as possibly. Stay warm, take care, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQZQXFZpTmQ |
| THE PROMPT: "2012 to others is a tragic year since it is associated with end of days. Express your sentiments on this." Well, that's a fine good evening and a start to the year now, isn't it? Didn't take me long to get all riled up now, did it? See, I don't believe in any of this random "end of the world" nonsense. I've been hearing it since I was a kid, and guess what? This big old ball of mass we call "Earth" is still friggin' turning. Save me your Raptures, your Mayan calendars, your biblical prophecies, all of that. When it's over, it's over, and I'm not changing anything "just in case". Eff that and a bag of chips...I'm more likely to walk off a curb tomorrow and be struck by a semi than any of this "end of days" bs coming to fruition. I can't call in sick to work just cuz I think the world is gonna end. Hell, even if some sick plagues come down and roads cave and locusts swarm, work's still gonna expect me to show up anyway, because people will still want to buy toilet paper and coffee, even though the world's imploding. My case in point: our store was on fire nearly a year ago, and as we tried to calmly get people out of the store, customers still browsed like it was no big deal. "Ma'am, you're going to have to leave the store. It's on fire." "Oh, well, I just have to grab a few things while I'm waiting for my prescription." "No, you need to leave. The building is on fire." "Can I just pay for my milk?" "NO!" That episode alone convinces me that the world will never end, because even in times of catastrophe, fools will still try to shop, and corporations will still expect there to be people at the ready to take care of them. And somehow, that will keep the world turning. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if around October-ish we started selling "World's Ending!" merchandise and party supplies. T-shirts, napkins, cups, plates, stuff with blinking lights..."Get your Apocalypse Now at Walgreens!" And you all know I'll be the a-hole stuck working by myself the day it doesn't end, and will have to deal with the disappointed, pissed off people wanting to return it all. Sentiments? Expressed. Now where's that curb I can walk off? MUSICAL BREAK!! I didn't even know what the prompt was before I left the house to do some shopping, but this was ironically the last song I heard on the radio as I was pulling into the garage. Eerie, the way these things work. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZDN9y2vTdUs That's what stumbling into the classic rock station gets me when I fail to travel without my iPod. VITAL STATS:  Bought new shoes today, because the shoes I've had for years aren't good enough and the ones I've bought recently haven't held up as well. We had all sorts of Kohl's coupons, discounts, and gift cards, so I basically spent $10 on a pair of Adidas I'm probably only going to return anyway, because they're a half-size too big. The Sketchers I liked were "last pair available" and not my size...oh no!! END OF THE WORLD!!And for a store the size of Kohl's, can you believe they don't sell shoelaces? I'd probably be fine wearing kicks a half-size bigger if they don't compromise my view of my feet feeling too big in these shoes, but these shoes need something other than white laces. Now I'mma hafta drag my ass to the mall to get laces that I like, for another pair of shoes I don't need, that I only paid $10 for, that I'll probably ruin at work anyway...when the world ends, no less. I have Coca-Cola Chicken waiting for me upstairs. Hit me up if you wanna know what that's all about. I blow off my day off and I get drama for it? 36, never married, never will be. Living the dream  . Today was the end of the world!!Selfish me is back in my little hole in the basement, and I'm not gonna apologize for that...it may be cold, but sometimes I need to be left alone. Alone and away from everyone else that irritates me. Where I don't feel like every misstep I take is the end of the world. That being said, GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7a_8F6gflxQ |
| THE PROMPT: "What makes you happy this New Year?" Happy New Year friends! It's time for the obligatory reflections and random statements about things we want to change/improve/lose/etc...and in a month (or less) realize that, well, we are who we are, and force ourselves to love ourselves and each other anyway. What's gonna make me happy this New Year? I'm simple. I try (and the operative word being "try") to not let the highs get too high and the lows get too low. I've been described by some as "easy-going" and "pretty much goes with the flow of things", and that's fairly accurate these days. I'm fairly adaptable also, which is just another way of saying "what might make me happy today might be totally different answer on any other day". I don't really have many long-term, big-picture answers for this, and the reason is simple: "He who expects little is seldom disappointed." That may have been the smartest piece of advice ever taken from a fortune cookie, ever. I really believe in that...why should I subscribe to some (likely attainable) goals set for myself in January when I know myself well enough to know that I will probably let myself down by not getting into better shape, not cutting back on my vices, or not becoming a nicer, more well-rounded individual? Don't get me wrong...it's not all due to lack of ambition. When I'm 100% all-in on something, I'm 110% all-in. That's why I won't subject myself to things like resolutions, or attempt to predict today how something may or may not make me happy six or ten months from now. That said, I will allow myself a little speculation on a few things that could happen this year that I can offer at least a 90% success rate of happiness (because the cautious side of me...and yes, there lies some caution in me these days...has to leave a little margin for error).  I'd like to see my Bills and Sabres do something other than mire in their years of mediocrity. I want them to provide me with something more than false hope for a few weeks. It's a little much to ask for a championship this year, but I'd like some sustained pleasure from at least one of these teams. I wouldn't mind winning this next edition of the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS"  , but I think this group of entrants provides a bit more competition. And while we're at the topic of the "30-Day Blogging Challenge ON HIATUS" , if my memory serves me right, in 2011 it's been held in months that had thirty-one days. Let's look into having a 30-Day Blog Challenge in months where there's only thirty days. Sorry, I'm a stickler for detail on occasion. I'd prefer to maintain my meaningful employment, even if I realize that it may occasionally sap me of my day-to-day happiness. I'll take that trade, if only because parting with money to maintain things like the roof, the phone, the internet, the gas, etc. is a slightly lesser evil than not actually having a job. Probably the most important thing would be the continued health and happiness of our little family here. Or, well, when it comes to health, maybe the restoration of it after three of the four of us get over our colds/sicknesses/whatever you want to call them.Yeah, that's it. As for my short-term happiness? I'll settle tonight for a good poop and a solid nap. We'll see how that works out. MUSICAL BREAK!! I can tell you until you're blue in the face from listening to me that I am a happy person all of the time. When the color returns to normal in your face, I'll listen to you tell me that you know me a little better than that. I'm not miserable; I'm a realist. I know it's not always easy to put a smile on every situation you come across. Maybe that's why I enjoy this song so much. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIjR-VGId4k VITAL STATS:  The Bills took on the Patriots and jumped out to a 21-0 lead! Then they forgot to show up for the final three quarters and lost 49-21. #thankgoodnessIdonthavetocaretilSeptember.{e:<insert the hockey emoticon that STILL doesn't exist "here">} So I was invited to play in a little event called "The Cheektowaga Winter Classic", a pick-up hockey game. It's been about five years since I strapped the pads on and stood between the pipes, but I was looking forward to this, even though it was outside and a little sprinkly out. So I got myself out of bed a little early, got ready, loaded my gear up and headed to the park this event was held in, only to find that all of no one showed. Turns out it was cancelled/being rescheduled. Good thing I was able to get a hold of someone to at least let them know I was running a few minutes late just so I could find out I didn't need to leave the house at all. The silver lining of this? Had I actually played hockey, I most likely would've missed the only part of the Bills' game that I was able to enjoy. The best part of New Years' festivities? For me, nowadays it's not the all-night binge drinking, ball-dropping (hee hee hee), the wonder of who's gonna kiss you at midnight, naw man, none of that. It's all of the year-ending "Best Of" and "Worst Of" lists. I love lists and the discussions and debates they inspire. I know, I'm a dork like that. Hey, I think I found something that'll make me happy...now if only I can figure out how to make it last for 364 more days. That's all for tonight....gonna work on those "short term" goals for happiness and see how the rest of the night goes. Peace and prosperity to all of you in the year of 2012...may you all find happiness, joy and success in all you do this year. GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cXSOD1N5lR4 |
| What is up, ladies and gentlemen? I'll tell you this...I am, and barely at that. What's pulling me through this day? It's simple. While I'm still not over my sickness from the last week (and standing out in the cold braving the Bills game at Ralph Wilson Stadium on Xmas eve didn't help), finally, something very amazing and powerful happened. Instead of being the one who gets sick off of someone else's sickness, I pretty much got sick on my own (and I'll blame the tempermental weather 'round here). And boy, did I do a really good job of passing it around. Jess and Josh have it. Some coworkers have unsilently motherfucked me for catching it. And let this be a warning to you all...I said it comes and goes quick...well, it doesn't. I'm feeling it in my throat again. I just sneezed a ton of times. There may be a second round to this "crazy disease" that everyone thinks I've given them. Yet when I catch your illnesses, I don't say a word. Why? Cuz I'm too sick to be funny. My synapses are fighting germs, thank you. You can be upset with me for taking a sick day during the busiest time of year, or you can realize, once I've gotten you sick, that my sicknesses are above a level you're able to fuck with. I don't call in sick for a reason. I show up, half dead. It takes a lot to proclaim myself unfit for the public to see/touch wrong. That was a pretty nice tangent. The point was, "When I get that sick, it's serious." I've battled through the yearly cold before, but nothing quite like this. And what the hell's the point of sick days anyway? May as well use them when you're sick, if ya got 'em. MUSICAL BREAK: The intended probably won't see this, and won't understand it if she does. At this point, she doesn't know me anymore anyway, and that's her choosing as far as I'm concerned. When you stand up for yourself in a family that is beyond dysfunctional, none of the personalities stands to win. If any of them wants to claim me, this is what they get from me. Happy b-day, sis. I can't believe any of you. At all. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jwo_HhhF0Js VITAL STATS: So my estranged dad texted Jess the other day (out of the blue), about how sorry he was about "being crazy recently". He hasn't spoken to us in almost two years! Had to have been texting the wrong person. Needless to say, Jess texted him back with "I accept your apology, but I can't forgive you, and maybe you should text your son." I haven't heard a peep from him. Guess he's being crazy to other people too now. And that's sealed the deal for me...I'm not having kids. I don't need this bullshit. The bloodline needs to end with me. I have enough problems of my own. I don't need to be passing them down to society. I hope this isn't as uncomfortable for you as it was for me. I didn't mean it to be. Hot lady needs to get the unsick kid out of our bed soon so I can get to bed at a decent hour...them crazy movie-watchers. Hot lady needs to get on the side of well soon also...we've got some unfinished business to copulate. Or something.And then I said "GOODNIGHT NOW!!" |
| Hey people...hope the holidays were happy and all. Now that the dust has settled, the wraps are off and the ribbons chewed by the cats, let's discuss something that's very near and dear to my heart (and my rectum)...working on Christmas Day. As you all know, I work for a large drug store chain. This particular one has decided (for many years) to keep the store open on Christmas Day. Right off the bat, save your catcalls about this. While it may sound like I'm speaking out of both sides of my mouth, well, I am. See below  Basically, if you want to work the holiday (anything from Thanksgiving-on), you sign up for it. And I don't mind working on Xmas. We do everything Christmas Eve (family-wise), and if me working Christmas Day means someone else gets to enjoy the holiday with their family instead of being pissed that they have to work, well, then that's my charitable contribution to the holiday. And besides the holiday pay (which, as a full-timer I would've gotten anyway), it's usually not that stressful of a day. There's the after-church rush and the pre-dinner rush. In between that, it's like a regular day. See, besides gas stations, we're the only game in town. But there's three things that bug me the most about working Christmas Day. 1) We're a drug store, and its most profitable sector (the pharmacy) is closed in most stores. That means all of the pharmacy calls are redirected to people who aren't used to dealing with a closed pharmacy, and they don't realize that there are maybe four stores that have 24-hour, almost-always open pharmacies that can fill scripts that they average worker can't. I'm sorry you suffered an allergic reaction on Christmas Eve, had to go to the ER, and now need meds. Not only am I not capable of giving them to you, but that corner of the joint is locked down. Only a licensed pharmacist can get back there, and 97% of them aren't doing anything else but celebrating the holidays. Feel better, or drive 20 minutes to the closest place that can actually help you. 2) Again, we're a drug store. Sure, we sell some convenience items, as well as having some decent home electronics and a nice selection of common groceries. I've worked enough holidays that I'm over the whole "Sorry you have to work on Christmas" (see above about why, again) that I don't just retort "Sorry you feel the need to shop on a major holiday" anymore. What kills me the most are the stupid questions, and really, while I get stupid questions every day, it's the holidays that seem to make people just that much more flaccid in the brain functionality department. "Do you sell microwaves?" No, we're not Target. "Do you have satellite radios?" No, we're not Best Buy. But my favorite had to be not a question, but a statement. "Tell me where you keep the horseradish." Excuse me? You're saying this like you know we've got it, and we sell it like it's milk. We're not Tops or Wegmans. We're not the friggin' Broadway Market. It's not even Easter. Why would one even assume we have horseradish? This baffles me. 3) We counted 10 people coming through the doors as we opened at 9am Christmas Day. That probably doesn't include the people who showed up at our normal opening time of 8am, and then tucked their tails between their legs after doing jumping jacks in front of the door sensors in hopes that they'd open magically with nobody in the building. And those facts alone don't even bother me anymore. What sent me trippin' even more was the astonishing amount of teens and twenty-somethings that came in for their "last minute" gifts, cards and gift cards. Even more astonishing was the amount of senior citizens that came in. Don't you remember what it was like when you were my age? NOTHING was open on Christmas Day. NOTHING. If you needed gas, tape, milk, sugar, whatever, you got it before the stores closed for the holidays or you were plain shit out of luck. "Last minute" meant the day before Christmas Eve. Maybe Christmas Eve...I know I was that guy hitting the mall an hour before it closed on Christmas Eve, in a drunken haze after work celebrations where little-to-no work was done, getting those last-minute gifts...because I didn't have the luxury of having anywhere to shop on Christmas Day. Perhaps it's how I remember growing up (and I'm not all that old either), but like I said...you had your shit early, or you were SOL. It's crazy how pretty much one giant corporation has changed the meaning of "last minute" to "whenever you want", and exposed us volunteers to perhaps the ugliest demographic of shoppers ever. Case in point: If you're coming in to the store in pajama pants and buying baby formula and a pregnancy test, you've got bigger problems than I have with any store being open on Christmas Day. You want egg nog? Cool, as long as we still have it. Batteries? No prob. But buying any of the "wine products" we sell (for gifting purposes) is an indictment on your gift-giving ability, as well as the distaste you have for your friends. Buy them real wine, from a real liquor store. Or just say that you didn't have the time to shop. They'll probably respect you more for that, because our "wine products" kinda sorta pretty much suck. (THANK GOD IT'S NOT THE CHRISTMAS) MUSICAL BREAK!! I'm not gonna run down all of the fantastic presents justjessica1 got me, but two were top-notch. She had to get me an iTunes card for me to get this, because there's no trusting any website that offers this as a download, and I haven't actually seen the dvd in stores. Radiohead's The King Of Limbs, from the basement: It's amazing how they can recreate this stuff live. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2084nQbmvk The second is a from a band that has just been doing their thing, their way, for 20 years. To me, it's growing up with a band. The book and dvd are in transit...can't wait for those goodies!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GzI8OhR0IVY VITAL STATS: The Sabres are rockin' the Caps 4-1 after two periods, and the 3rd is starting. All of my gifts were fantastic. Sabres hat and retro t-shirt, some awesome music, and nice little things. Plus work pants, which were much needed. And luckily, the ladyfriend appreciated the kitcheny-stuff she wanted. Lots of laptop issues today...possibly due to the holiday and me not touching it the last few days while it was still on. Should've shut it down, but I didn't realize it was on for that long. I blame Tebow...and the dirty taps at Ralph Wilson Stadium. Clean them lines out!!That's all for tonight...J's son is here to finish cleaning up their side of the basement to make room for the best tv in the house. I'll be down from internet access for a little bit....hopefully not for long. I'll just pay some attention to the Sabres game and get a decent night of sleep. My best to you all....GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bedgFDOpxEs |
| Good evening everybody! Comin' at you live and direct from a chilly ManCave in Lancaster, NY, I want to wish you all a happy holidays! Merry Christmas, Happy Hannukah, Pleasant Kwaanza, all of that! Whatever it is you celebrate, celebrate it! And if you don't celebrate anything, celebrate that too! I wanted to get that out of the way before I head upstairs, where the warmth and the wrapping papers live. Gotta wrap Jess' gifts while she's still at work. And I'm the worst wrapper ever. I used to comission my poor sister to wrap my presents for me, because she did a nice job. They'd look professionally wrapped. She'd wrap everything for me, except what I got for her. She'd do all of that work, and then come Christmas, she'd get my hand-mauled, tape-infested, monstrosity of a wrap job gift. And it would take her minutes to open it. I'm the worst brother ever. So luckily, justjessica1 is the only person I have to wrap for. And she's benefitted from me getting better at wrapping over the years. The more focus, love and care you put into it, the better off you end up. Although it requires patience, I've gained some of that over the years, and it does help. I'm sure you're curious as to what I got her. Well, I can't tell that here. Not that she'll read this anytime soon or anything, but I gotta maintain the safety of the gifts. What I can do is tell you what she didn't get. And why she didn't get them. The primary reason is...even though she dropped a lot of hints and I listened, I didn't remember shit quite the way I wanted to. Next year? Write it all down. Then I don't have to rely on what she tells the kids she wants. Boy did I fuck this one up this year...I'm the worst boyfriend ever too. She did not get: Tickets to any sporting event, as she has the last couple of Christmases. I can only get away with that for so long. I'm gonna need to start making it a non-Xmas thing. Plus, my boy Adam sprung some free Bills tickets for tomorrow, so the charade is over. Sports tix are for me as well. And I couldn't find anything fancy to go along with them this year, as in years past. Tickets to a night with Alec Baldwin (either at UB or Shea's, I don't remember). Cuz them ducats were a little too pricey. Although, I suppose if you add up the total cost of everything I got her (including stocking stuffers), and figure in the labor and materials it would take to wrap it all, I probably should've just done that and been done and wouldn't have had to worry about having enough things for her. Tickets to see the world's greatest Beatles tribute band, Rain. Why? Them ducats are way too pricey! Way more than they were the last two times we saw them. Plus, her brother-in-law has a side job bartending for Shea's (where the gig is at), and if I really wanted to, I could see if he'd get us a deal. But damn them tix are expensive now! DVD's of shows she watches...because I just thought of it now, and I'm already over budget.There are a lot of other things she did not get as well. She did not get a pony, nor a red wagon. What she will get is Chinese food for dinner on Christmas Day, cuz that's what we do. We work, eat, and exchange gifts. And we get the added bonus of watching a football game. That, to me, is exciting...and I'm probably going to be more excited about what she gives me this year than she'll be about what I give her. But I could be wrong...she did say she wanted these things. We'll see. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Let me first say that I'm more than pleased to get this out of the way. Cuz I'm damn tired of the music. Second, I'm posting this because I feel bad for this man. I'm an unabashed fan of this man, but this is abysmal. He pretty much name-checked all of his hits just to write a freakin' stinkin' Christmas song. I feel bad for the little kids in the video, who will never know of his legend. They'll only remember this dreck, and that they were a part of it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yJiCFE3EFF4&ob=av2e VITAL STATS:  Got hand and toe warmers for tomorrow's Bills game. Need to get back at my boy about it quick, but dammit, I can't wait! I haven't tailgated in years, and no one tailgates like Bills fans. To the family I'll be having dinner with tomorrow evening, I apologize in advance. Bonus for the game: one of my cousins is going also, and we're trying to meet up. I'm excited for that. I haven't seen him in awhile. I hope it works out. Why I don't trust ladders: After your boss leaves for a couple hours on a really busy day that you've just unloaded truck on, don't trust her to hold a ladder for you. Not when you have ladder issues. Not when you've fallen 15 feet off one once. Cuz she doesn't give a fuck while she's holding that ladder to steady it. She doesn't care that you've fallen once. She doesn't care that you've been "picking up the pace", and she certainly doesn't care that you've been dealing with the most unsightly, ridiculously smelly people all day. She just needs the mess that you made in the name of customer service cleaned up...4 hours ago. As I climb the ladder to atone for my misdeed, I get uneasy. You fall once and it happens; you're always gonna be uneasy. As I'm plotting my steady decline, she grabs the ladder to steady it...only the weight shifts, and I smash the side of my face on a box while I'm descending. Happy Xmas to me, half an hour after I should've already gone home.OK, I've gotta wrap some presents. The boys are home and debating religious beliefs. I have to wrap their mother's presents in the midst of it, and try to bite my tounge. Mr. "Always Has Something To Say" needs to stay on Santa's kinda-ok side for a few days. Fans, friends, and homies, peace and love to you all. Thank you for a great and prosperous year. I wouldn't be here without you. I wish you all the very best in 2012. Thanks for stopping by, and please come again. Happy Holidays, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| ...(Or, the separation between religion and football). What's up everybody? Sorry I missed a day...got up early to take the fine lady to work, went back to sleep, woke up with enough time to get myself to work, and by the time I came home I was just too spent to be any sort of productive. I know you'll forgive me. In lieu of details of the last few days, let's look ahead, shall we? Saturday is Christmas Eve already. And boy don't ya know it, but I've got some plans. My buddy Adam scored some tix to the Bills game, and requested my presence, which was very, very nice of him. After finagling my schedule, I was able to confirm my attendance. And that's a great feeling, when you can make things work out for ya during times like these. So what does this mean? The morning of Christmas Eve will be spent in the parking lot of Ralph Wilson Stadium, and the afternoon will be spent inside of same said stadium. Watching a stumbling Bills team take on the phenomenon swiffering the nation known to us mere mortals as "Tebow". You know, as in "Tim" Tebow. As in...well, you get it. Dude takes a lot of heat for his ways, and by "heat" I don't mean "packing his gun while up in the club". Dude's hardcore religious. And that's cool. While he might throw out a verse here or there, or the standard-issue "Praise Jesus"-tinged post-game remark, he's not using his locker as a soapbox, trying to convert NFL fans over to Christianity one by one. And while in most of his games he's led his team off to abysmal starts, he (or is it He?) finds a way almost always to pull it out in the 4th quarter. I mean, unsatifying throwing mechanics aside, what else is there to say about the kid? Dude wins. Conversely, since Buffalo's Ryan Fitzpatrick finally signed his contract extension, his stats (and the Bills' season) have gone in the tank. While not totally his fault, he has looked far from impressive the last few weeks, save a drive or two here and there. Given how both teams have performed in the last two months, I don't think it'd be a stretch to say you could look at either team and think at one point earlier in the season their records would be what the other team currently has. But that's life in the NFL. That whole "any given sunday" schtick... Anyway, I'm hoping for a good game, and a solid Buffalo breeze that goes through the spine of the former Florida Gator. You know, the same one that used to affect all of the Southern Californian QB's we used to draft or sign as free agents. Or, the same ones that wouldn't affect the Pennsylvanian-born QB's, or the ones that made their careers in Canada before crossing the Peace Bridge to resurrect their NFL careers in The 'Lo. Just sayin'. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK (X2)!! I'll double-up today for missing a day...songs I haven't heard in years, but songs I grew up on. Enjoy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wIRP4Xvu_bs All this video needs to accompany the seizure-inducing hat this puppet wears are some back-up puppet singers and a backdrop that didn't look like I hung the decorations after too much egg nog, followed by a little more egg nog. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKT5eUI333k VITAL STATS:  I don't even care where our seats are on Saturday...all I know is that they're inside The Ralph. And I'll actually be going with someone that wants me to go with them, rather than someone who offered me a ticket, only to renege and feel bad enough to buy me a ticket a few sections over, where I had to sit by myself. Yeah, that was the last time I went to a Bills game, maybe seven or eight years ago. Thanks for that memory, *unnamed family member that denies my existence*. Thankfully, as of earlier today, there were still 24,000 seats available for this damn Bills game. Know what that means? Ain't gonna be so much traffic in Orchard Park!! That's the biggest pain in the ass, in my opinion, about going to a Bills game. Orchard Park is a suburb about 20-25 minutes from me, but it's HELL on gameday Sundays, even when you're not going to the game. I used to work about five minutes from the stadium, and it could be hell trying to get to work, even if nobody was gonna be at your mall because they were all at the game. So this whole "Tebowing" thing...is it necessary? Is he truly an athlete worth emulating? When we were kids playing pickup football (on the corner lot of a once-prestigious church, no less), we emulated the moves of our idols. We wanted to be "this guy" or "that guy". We wanted to do what our professional heroes did. If I ran a kickoff or an interception back for a touchdown, I'd do the Deion Sanders high-step sway into the end zone when I knew I wasn't gonna be caught. (Like this, at about 28 seconds, and again near the end...I'd put my hand behind my head and start high-striding when I knew I had 6, just like Prime Time... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j01EfdyZtaU)But nowadays, this Tebow cat is different, and erryboddyy tryin' to catch a ride on his move...the simple one knee down, elbow resting on the up knee with the forehead holding the fist down in a comtemplative guise. Where does that come from? What happened to God-fearing NFL ballers just tossing the ball to refs and pointing up quick at their savior before accepting congradulatory hand slaps from teammates? Why this almost unseen act of solitude on a football field, in the midst of a team game? I don't get it. When Tebow goes to mass, and his minister has led them through almost 50 minutes of boring, nonsense drivel, does the minister wrap it up with some wham-bang, 10-minute long praise chorus, kick ass breakdown that makes the last fifty before seem meaningless, and then spike his bible as if he just scored a game-winning touchdown in the final minute of mass? Maybe that's what I don't get about religious people...and that's why I'll never try to tie religion into football again. And please, don't preachy me as to how special your respective religions are. That don't make me likey. They're great for you, and I respect that. I don't make you respect the King Of Beers, and mutual admiration is all I ask for. Please, and thank you. All that said, I'd be remiss if I didn't pass this along. It's been shared many times, but tonight is my time to share it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d1sf5yqZX-kAnd that's about where I'm gonna leave off for tonight. I'll make up for all of my past sins later and live for another day. Give thanks, and don't forget to live, love and laugh, or something like that. Peace out everyone, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQ6vat1DIRI |
| Good evening people...'tis the season and all! In the grand spirit of miscommunication, and the cancellation of an evening's worth of finishing my Christmas shopping, I'm presenting you with "Who Do I Think I Am??" 's first annual Gift Giving Guide! Offbeat, delightful treats for friends and family members who might not be "all there" be a little difficult to shop for. THE SPORTS FAN: Nobody likes to get socks for Christmas. It's a known fact. Santa's elves make toys, not clothes. However, these might be some of the most enjoyable socks you'll find: http://www.hockeysockey.com/Home.htm How about one of the most beloved, if not damning, and favorite childhood backyard sports? I didn't know there was an actual rule book...it's true! Or that you can buy balls in volume? Or that it's probably still as cheap now as it was when I was a kid? One thing is certain...I probably still cannot hit a curveball. http://www.nomas-nyc.com/19-wiffle-ball Say, does your sports fan like to have an occasional beverage? I know a few who do! Why settle for the plain beer soda coozie just like everyone else, when you can rep your team and give your beverage a little style in one of these: http://www.fanmugonline.com/ (Notice the curious omission of a certain Buffalo football franchise...just because us fans can't have a good team doesn't mean we can't drown our sorrows in a fancy mug!) THE MUSIC FAN: Your concert-going buddy has outlived the memories of that show you guys went to twenty years ago...and he's outgrown the shirt, too. And since he had to get a shirt at every show he went to, he's got a drawer full of shirts that no longer rock past his rolls. Problem? No way! Go here, and he'll thank you forever! http://www.campusquilt.com/ Does your rock star wannabe fancy him- or herself a glass of wine once in awhile? That's nice. But why give anyone a glass of wine when you can give them a whole bottle? And why give them just a bottle at Christmas time when you can give them wine all year long? Just stop reading this...no, keep reading this, and then go here: http://www.winesthatrock.com/ Like to sing, but can never find a microphone handy when that Lady Gaga-like inspiration hits? No problem! Never let the urge to wear meat pass you by again with this amazing gadget that plugs directly into your iPhone. Your Facebook fan page will be blowing up with "Likes" in no time! http://www.ikmultimedia.com/irigmic THAT JERK WHO THINKS HE HAS IT ALL: There's really no explanation, other than he probably doesn't have this: http://www.clingblings.com/SearchResults.asp?Cat=7 And that jerk doesn't know it yet, but he really needs this: http://www.amazon.com/Assholes-Finish-First-Tucker-Max/dp/1416938745/ref=sr_1_1?... But really, what this guy needs, is: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r4p8qxGbpOk THAT CHICK THAT WON'T LEAVE YOU ALONE: One of these days you'll get her to stop talking about how many diseases she's caught just from watching Jersey Shore. Until then, get her this and boast to all of your friends that you hung Snooki from a tree. http://style.mtv.com/2011/11/23/snooki-holiday-ornament/ Maybe, just maybe, you can kill two birds with one stone...get her sloppy drunk and take advantage of her! Everyone wins! http://happybitchwines.com/ And when all else fails and you've run out of options, this should do the trick... http://divorcelawyersnow.org/ Happy gifting everybody!! CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Oh my...Don't ask me what I was doing when I plugged the name of this '80's band into the Youtube search bar. I don't know why I thought a pre-cracked out, pre- "My Perogative" slope Bobby Brown and a pre-"Poison" Bell Biv Devoe and a pre-"one hit wonder" Johnny Gill would have a Christmas song...Youtube, you have not failed me! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ziXb5AWKlRQ VITAL STATS:  As long as I have the right mix of Dayquil and caffeine, I should be good to go back to work tomorrow. Which is fantastic, since I'll be arriving right in the midst of "Have your kid's picture taken w/ G-Stammta Claus". Maybe I should look into something a little stronger than Dayquil. It appears Wednesday night might be my last opportunity to finalize the shopping of the last gifts. Too much other crap going on this week that I've already forgotten about.Ugh. Alright kids, that's enough outta me for one day. Have a great evening, and we'll do it again tomorrow. GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Hey people...I've come to a realization that there's a good thing about being sick. It's taking that medicine-induced nap that consists of three hours of not feeling like you're coughing up nails and rubber cement every thirty seconds. The only drawback to that? While laying there in that post-nap haze, you feel something like a cat about to jump on your chest, and you scream when you realize it's your girlfriend trying to kiss you on the forehead cuz she thinks you're still in dreamland...thereby erasing all that goodwill you've done to your throat. So after sweating through a fever most of the night and waking up halfway through it gaagging on the post-nasal disgustingness to the point of almost vomiting, foolish me decided to try to make it to work today. And that lasted all of one and one-half hours. The Dayquil wasn't working and the OJ was still making me feel like I was being stabbed in the throat (ohhhhh, baaaaad pun). Lethargy replaced all personality. Productivity would've been the bare minimum. I came home and took the first of two very comforting naps. I may have still had that fever through the first nap, because I woke up drenched in my own cold sweat. Jess' dad was coming over for dinner and to paint one of our living room walls for her, so I stuck it out for a little bit. Sensing it'd be for the best, I excused myself and took another nap (the nap I described in my opening). Finally, 12 hours after my initial attempt at tackling this sickness, do I feel semi-capable of doing anything. And all I'm gonna do is go back to sleep and do pretty much nothing but relax on my "real" day off tomorrow. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! I love this band, and I think I have all of their cd's...but I never knew they did a Christmas song until I started this little project. It's simple and to the point... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=imYlMw8tcoY VITAL STATS:  Wow Bills...that 30-23 loss to the Dolphins didn't sound nearly as close as the score indicated. Ate a real meal for maybe the second time all week (remember, I started the week with a stomach virus). Yeah, that may have tasted good and I may have needed the nourishment, but that didn't go over well.  Kinda glad that when I tried to schedule a doctor's appointment for a routine check-up in September, they didn't have any openings til this week. May have to finish my Christmas shopping tomorrow anyway, even though I'll be off Wednesday (due to said appointment). Although I'm not so sure I'll want to get up and take Jess to work at 7am when I can just sleep in and go without a car for the day. But I guess I can shop in the evening if she doesn't have anything else going on. That's all for tonight folks...thanks for putting up with my pathetic, sick self for a night. Hope you're all doing well. Peace and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Good evening fine friends...all I can say is WOW!! What helps a stubborn chest cold (at least temporarily)? Good, loud rock and roll. Music where the bass and drum make you think the cement floor under your feet is shaking. Emotional music done right...heartfelt pop/punk/metal that turns you as often as the song turns. Ladies and gentlemen, that was my evening. My buddy Josiah's band Letterset played their last show ever tonight, and to say it was EPIC is probably the understatement of the year. It had every element a great concert should have: great music, great friends and not a minute that sucked at all. Jojo used to work with justjessica1, and a lot of his old co-workers were there, which was nice to see them as well. Too bad Jess couldn't actually make it...she had to work, so I took her boys as a Christmas present. And I can't get over how great they sounded! They played an indoor skate park called Xtreme Wheels...a neat concept: skaters, bikers and rock dudes and chicks all under the same roof. I've seen bands play there before, and I always thought their sound system sucked, but today it was pretty sweet. I was impressed. Jojo's probably one of the three best drummers I've ever seen, and I've seen a lot of bands in my day...here's him drumming along to Blink 182: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXaOmZBuMTU I wish I could show you his clip where he's drumming along to "I'm On A Boat" by The Lonely Island...but I heard a rumor that included something about a "cease-and desist".  I wish them all well, and good luck with all of their future endeavors. If they continue to stay in the music scene, they'll all have a great resume based off of their recorded material. You might want to check them out on iTunes...totally worth it.  CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! I had to share this and keep in a semi-metal mood for tonight, but with some very familiar characters. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4AC3sZB-v7Q VITAL STATS:  Random Letterset video! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Z8qG4Inizk Yup, Im definitely sick. Felt it starting Thursday, and then woke up with the sore throat and cough on Friday. And even though I got to sleep in a little today, that didn't help. It was still a struggle at work today, at least until the Dayquil kicked in. I took a nap when I got home and almost didn't make it to the show, but I trucked it out. Tomorrow may be worse...I never work Sundays (for good reason) but I needed Wednesday off this week so I'm going in tomorrow. Not like I'm gonna miss the Bills game, which isn't on tv again this week.Ok, I'm gonna tie up some loose ends and try to call it an early night. Peace and love...GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IT4oC8IWToU Thank you for the shirt, Mrs. LeRoy! And thanks for all the kind words and for stopping by, Mr. LeRoy! |
| What's up y'all? TGIF and whatnot, right? I guess so...I'm on my second wind after waking up at 5:15 this morning for work, and of course as soon as I layed down for a short nap after I got settled in, justjessica1 came home from work and decided to join me. Needless to say, the nap didn't quite happen. So I'm gonna litter you with some randomness while watching the Sabres game on MSG...  To the Sabres' season ticket holders that sold their seats to tonight's game, thanks for filling First Niagara Center (aka: The FN Center ) with Maple Leaf fans. They were booing Sabres fans before the game, and during the Canadian National Anthem you could hear them singing along through their Labbatt's. Solution: Don't have the legendary Doug Allen sing the Canadian anthem. I'm fine with just this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dB7NgRjC2Ac. Or, if you're going to continue to pander to the Leafs' fans, then Sabres fans, you need to do a better job of screaming our anthem. Buffalo is Hockey Heaven! Make it hell for the opposing team! That said, the Sabres look good through two periods so far. Best thing I've seen on Facebook in a long time, regarding Tim Tebow, who's getting lots of national attention (and really, kinda deservingly)..."Tim Tebow is the first white Bronco with this kind of following since the one belonging to O.J." Buffalo Blue Cheese Pretzel Combos...yup, my dinner was definitely better than yours . http://www.foodprocessing.com/vendors/products/2011/065.html I've not been more excited for a local concert in a long time....Saw my buddy Josiah today, who delivered Jess' boys' Christmas presents...tickets to their farewell show tomorrow night. I'm psyched to see them play, but not for the last time. Here's a video I shot of them a few months ago: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TX68hZyvX-0&feature=plcp&context=C3e36211UDOEgsTo...CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! So I remembered that this band did this traditional song, so I went to look for it...and found this little gem instead, of a drunk girl lip-syncing to it. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=19feB1rRzkU I love her decorative way of using Xmas lights...and the well-used piece of exercise equiptment! VITAL STATS:  Sabres win!! But I missed the end of it. Phaneuf won't sit more than he already did for his hit on Kassian. Still nice to see the Sabres put together a pretty solid game in front of the home fans against a hated rival. On a rare Sunday that I actually have to work, I won't mind so much missing a Bills game against their divisional rival, the Miami Dolphins. We have an excuse for not selling out the game...it's gonna be damn cold. Jacksonville? Tampa Bay? What's your excuse? You have a terrible team? Well, ours isn't much better. But I'd kill to watch my team in 70-degree weather in December. That's enough randomness for tonight...the woman just got home, there's people over and my concentration is being pulled in multiple directions. Have a great weekend everyone...peace, and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Well hello friends...So, you've heard me say once or twice around these parts that at work we're like a family. If I may, ahem, expand on that description a little, we're, ummm, that family. If you're easily offended by sexual descriptions, vagina jokes, and general weirdness, please kindly hit the "X" in the top right corner of your screen and carry on with the rest of your evening....NOW. Thank you and have a nice night. See, there's a few of us around the building who are comfortable enough around each other that can make obscene jokes with no fear of offending the other party. A typical day's events can trigger at least a few moments of hysterical laughter. Even the mere verbalizing of putting anything in a box can lead to snickers and hysterics. I'm totally ok with this. And I'm ok with the people that aren't. I'm pretty good like that...knowing who I can joke with and what I can get away with. In retail, when you see your coworkers as often (if not more) than your own family, you need to be able to find the humor in your job. Our way of finding it? Basically by becoming walking, talking versions of harrassment training modules. Case in point: after lunch, my manager, the manager below her, a regular employee and myself are sitting in the office. The employee and the manager below the store manager are talking about running, and pain, and taking a shot to the knee for the pain. The dialogue went something like this: Employee: "You ever get that shot in your knee?" EXA: "Yeah! It hurts like fuck!!" Manager: "That's not supposed to hurt." Me: "Yeah, maybe you're doing it wrong?" I didn't think it was that funny, until my boss started laughing. And when I noticed her laughing, I started laughing. That made her laugh even harder, which sent me into a fit of laughter. That caught the attention of the other two, who were still into their conversation and couldn't figure out what was so damn funny. And neither my boss nor myself was in any shape to even speak, let alone tell them. I was laughing so hard, I had to take my glasses off because I was getting tears on them. It took a good five minutes to regain enough composure...and sure enough, I forget what was even said, but the one manager said something and I nearly choked on my coffee from trying to stop it from coming out of my nose. I may bitch about my job from time to time, but it's moments like that with people you enjoy that make punching in every day all that much better. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Well, may as well keep up all of the inappropriateness. I was gonna save this song for the week of Christmas, but is there no better entry available in the entire world that I can safely attach this song to. And it's not really a Christmas song, but then again, when a song has "happy" and "holidays" in the title, how can it not be a Christmas song? And if you've made it this far, you have no right to bitch about how disgusting you think it is. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1fECcM0cS4 VITAL STATS:  So I'm kinda not hungry for any kinda dinner now that justjessica1 is into round 2 of cookie making, and I'm ok with that. Why, might you ask? She made these amazing cookies from a recipe she found...Potato Chip Cookies!! Cuz I had four and I'm full and don't have the energy for a . They've gotta be decent for you, right? I mean, potato chips are made of potatoes, and that's a vegetable. And the pound of butter is made from milk, and that comes from cows, so that's healthy, right? Oh, and by the way, these cookies are nicknamed "Did you hear that? That's the sound of my arteries clogging." But they're sooooooooo goooooooood...they taste like Pecan Sandies almost. Stop me before I run upstairs and get more... Honestly, outside of all of the playful offensiveness, it's been a boring day. See how some foul humor breaks up a boring life? Ok, I'm gonna go...my stomach's still acting up (thank you, Potato Chip Cookies and Taco Bell), and I have to be up at the butt-ass crack of dawn for work tomorrow, so I need to make this an early night. But I'm gonna take the low road and slide in one last utterly offensive smack while I can....GOODNIGHT NOW!! http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&NR=1&v=Un1Q2JMPPyQ |
| Hey Wednesday, what's up? Obscure references to that aside, how's everybody doin' out there? We ready to party yet? Good! Me neither. I'm not gonna lie...it's been kinda boring save work all of the crazies being out at work today. I suppose I should shine light on the gluttony tomorrow at work, as me being the "5-Minute Meeting" person who hasn't had a "5-Minute Meeting" in over 14,400 minutes. Customer complaints are rising, along with sales of wrapping paper. I'd love to share two with you: I won't get into the whole seriousness of what "Professional Pictures" means to a retail operation's Photo Lab, but I will tell you that everyone who works in the lab is not only trained on how to know what's professional and what's not, but has to take a refresher every year. And yet, people still try to skirt the Copyright Law issue. Let's put it this way: A professional photographer owns the rights to his work the same way an author owns the rights to his novel, a painter owns the rights to his paintings, and a singer owns the rights to a song he/she has written. That's what prevents you and I from re-writing The DaVinci Code but changing the names of characters to something cooler, or turning Lady Gaga's next single into gangsta rap for profit.Yet people always try to make their kid's school pictures into a Christmas Card. One: It's a lame idea. Be original. Two: It's a violation of Copyright Law. We're not supposed to sell you those cards if it's clearly a violation. Big drama ensues. So a woman did exactly just that, and tried to tell us that she took the pics herself. Really? You own those backdrops? Or are your living room walls painted sky blue with clouds? We may work in retail. But not all of us are idiots. G-Stamm tries to shoot her down by mercilessly inflicting Copyright Law on her, to no avail. The manager on duty (with previous photo lab experience) attempts to back him up, also to no avail. Lying to us makes you look stupid, but not getting what you want and throwing a tantrum in the store makes you look even more stupid. What makes us look stupid? Knowing that if you bitch and complain high-up enough, corporate's gonna let you duplicate anything just to make a buck and keep customers happy. This woman went to the main register and asked for a corporate number so she could complain (and really, that's not where I'd go if I were gonna complain about a law, but I'm just a retail peon). I was called for it so I went to the office to get it. This bitch didn't even leave the parking lot...within five minutes, as the manager on duty and I were still discussing it, there was the call from the district office. About a concern in photo. Regarding cards and professional pics. And their advice? Sell the cards, make the money, and don't question it. My response (and this is why I don't answer the phone much...and wasn't touching this situation)? Why the fuck do they spend all of this time and money to train us on how not to accept these things, yet fail to back us up when we act accordingly to the policies they train us on? How is that fair to any employee? That's why I stayed as far away from this as I could. We've already been warned that we're not the "copyright police", and even Photo Jesus himself has softened his stance for the greater good, even though he was pretty good in his day about explaining the whys and hows about how he would love to be able to help them, but couldn't. Crisis usually averted. But this time of year, some people are soooooo determined... That we get into this situation, and really, for what it's worth, it's not worth it for either of us. Especially since you're cheapin' out.Customer complaints come to us through an email that translates voicemails. Quite elaborate, and too much, if you ask me. Maybe if corporate would just call us instead, we'd have a little more payroll to give the smarter people more hours during the busiest time of the year. But I digress. This one starts off with "I purchased a $5 ornament for someone as a gift the other day." Well, there's your first problem. You're buying gifts at a drug store, what do you expect? I get it that some people can't get around to everywhere, nor have the money to buy fancy things, but really? Really?? Really. "The cashier put the ornament in the bag with other things I bought. I got home and the ornament was crushed. Way to ruin this Christmas." Oh my God, do I wanna jump out of my chair and attack my laptop for having just typed that. True story, and I get to reiterate it to people tomorrow morning. I get that we're a drug store, and we can't hire every Rhodes Scholar-in-training, but give us a freakin' break. You want to be in and out as quick as possible, and we're doing our damnedest for you and everyone else behind you. Yeah, sometimes, common sense flies out the window. I, for one, don't always pay attention to what you buy, because I only care about you actually buying something rather than stealing it, and prefer to chatter you somewhat humorously, so that you might enjoy coming to my store. If the person cashing you out notices there's a line forming behind you, calls for help and can't get it because the one person schedually-designed for those situations is on lunch and everyone else is too stuck helping customers with the most ridiculous of questions to contribute to the line moving quicker, mistakes will happen. They happen everywhere else. They'll happen here. Far be it from me to tell that same complainer that "Ya know what? When we get out warehouse delivery totes every week, more often than not there's cans of cat food in the same tote as light bulbs. And more often than not, those light bulbs are broken. Sorry about your $5 ornament that the three other stores you called are also out of, but cat food breaking light bulbs doesn't ruin my day, and neither should your ornament being broken ruin your drug store Christmas." Although I would've loved to say that. Being in such proximity to the Canadian border, I'm thinking one of these two situations involved a Canadian. No offense to my Canadian friends, but sometimes, you like to bitch at us for pretty ridiculous things that really turn out to be a waste of a good worry. But I still love y'all. And y'all know that. So... CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! I totally forgot about this...and I know I posted it on Facebook maybe a year or two ago. Fans of this old early '80's Canadian cult classic http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0086373/ will totally dig this twisted take on a Christmas classic: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l2oPio60mK4. I personally am fine with the first day, all twelve days. Maybe even a couple times a day.VITAL STATS:  The stomach issues have gone away mostly...my first real meal in two days was a Tim Horton's bagel with bacon, egg and cheese. That only bothered me a little bit. Skipped my pizza for lunch. Jess' youngest ate it for dinner. Jess' oldest made a fantastic pizzadilla though, with a "special cheese sauce" he made himself. I was hungry but a little scared, given some scattershot kitchen endeavors he'd had. I'm proud to say it was damn tasty. My belly, however, wants to make me shart again beyond my will to prevent it. Maybe it's the dairy...or that the people I live with watched "The Help" on dvd last night, and are trying to send me a message. For those who don't know, Tim Horton's is based out of Canada. Mr. Horton was a hockey player who played for the Toronto Maple Leafs and the Buffalo Sabres. He died a Sabre, nearing the end of his career. We commemorate him with about as many Tim Horton's donut shops on our street corners as you in Anywhere Else, USA has a McDonalds. I've had many bad experiences with that damn donut shop, but today was very pleasant...even if I worked through a break trying to eat my bagel, and looked bad about it several times. Maybe upper management needs to mind their own shit. Although, she was pretty nice to me today (even though I slept in a little beyond my start time...that's what happens when I stay up late the night before, in part due to being at work). Eh, the give-and-take of holiday retail. Like my boy DMFM used to say, "Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke!" So very true. You've got to leave room for fun and compromise this time of year, or else the rest of it will be the end of ya. And none of us wants that...shit'll drive ya crazy if ya let it. Especially in retail...you're selling other people shit that they can't have, or you don't have, or doesn't exist; you have a family that you have to gift and you can't find what you need. The ultimate double-edged sword. Those last two sentences really kind of deny any sense of Christmas spirit within me. Luckily, I was able to secure the intent on my first round of Xmas gifts. At least I'm a little pro-active this year. Can it not be cold anymore? Please and thank you. Just to prove I love Canadians (as much as the run-of-the-mill shopper-elite Canucks piss me off when they "vacation" here in Buffalo during our busiest retail season and we don't stock their favorite tanning slather of choice...and really, if you're not 19 and a dumb dirty chick from The 'Lo, you have no business buying tanning lotion from anyone other than the place whose beds you lie in), I offer this link for your consideration: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=thMNEqxxTnY And I'm out...that pizzaiolia thing wrecked my lactose-unintelligible belly. Gonna take a well-deserved nap tonight and move on to another day that will hopefully find me a little more challenged in a good way. Peace out y'all...GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Hey everyone...did I not get the memo? Isn't the day after Christmas supposed to be the big, terrifying day where everyone returns the crappy presents they got or swap out their sweatshirts for a larger size cuz granny forgot they turned twelve 20 years ago? Well, you would swear Christmas was yesterday in my store's neighborhood, because every ten minutes from the time I started and got situated (let's say 3pm) until at least 8:30, I was called to do a return/exchange. Mostly normal ones, but two ridiculous ones... The old lady who returned a star for the top of her tree because, "I put it on, and my tree fell over." The sisters (and I know they had to be sisters...they looked alike and wore more makeup than, well, every makeup wearing person combined...jars of foundations and creams and blushes galore went into the creation of those faces) who tried returning two bottle of shampoo for two more expensive bottles of shampoo. And of course there was no receipt, so I looked up the products and, of course, we hadn't sold them in at least three months. "Well yeah they wouldn't be in your computer; I didn't get them here. I got them at your other store." Right. Sorry, can't help ya. Mind you, all of this happened while I'm suffering from a stomach virus. Luckily some ginger ale pretty much took care of that. I guess my return drama karma from last night caught up with me. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! I don't have time nor the will to be funny tonight, but this song is, in an "off-guard" kind of way ("off-guard" as in you most likely have not heard a Christmas song revolving around this kind of subject matter). You've heard this man before, and I had to share another selection from his holiday album: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7RdaVxKvurE It's a live clip, with some unintelligible banter at the beginning you'll have to bear with (or maybe my laptop's volume is too low due to me being in the same room with people watching a movie and I'm too lazy to go downstairs). The song's worth it. VITAL STATS: Nothing much to note. Been nothin' goin' on but work and sleep since last night. But...I smell...cookies!! Jess and some of her friends made cookies! Yay! That's all for me...gonna bore my self to sleep in a little bit. Enjoy the rest of your evening and GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Good evening people. Got a little story for ya...starts poorly but has a happy outcome, so I'll share. I'll preface it with a question that you've probably never heard, nor asked. And 93% of you will probably get it wrong. Did you know that stores like http://www.biglots.com/ have Furniture Department Managers? Me neither. They're a discount retailer selling the crap Walmart and Target couldn't sell two years ago...I just figured they assigned employees to specific departments to straighten them up and had stockpersons help with the big stuff (not that you can usually find anyone working anywhere besides the register in Big Lots, but anyway...).So back in August, as I'm wont to do once in awhile, I was flippin' through their ad in The Metro Source when something caught my eye. I had been looking for a chair to replace the rickety old one I was using at my computer desk in my ManCave. They had one on sale for $59. The chairs I had seen at Office Max and Office Depot hadn't caught my eye, and the ones that did were in excess of $100, which was more than I was willing to spend. I guess I probably wanted more chair for less buck. That's where Big Lots comes in. I went over there (ten minute drive) to check it out. Sure enough, for $59 you could get a basic low-back chair on wheels, with plastic armrests and mesh cusioning. Or, for $79 you could get the adjustable-height, leathery lookin' with padded armrests (key feature), mid-back Executive chair. As I was not interested in the $99 chair, it's worth noting that the only difference (for $20) was that it was high-back. I wanted the $79 chair. I liked the price, I liked the look, and (I never thought I'd be saying this about a chair, but) I liked the features. Made a phone call to justjessica1 to get the approval, and took it home. All was well in the world (once I finally got it together). (For reference, they no longer have the actual chair I purchased on their website. They've replaced it with this one, which is the same exact thing only without the crucial padded armrests: http://www.biglots.com/browseItem/desks-and-office-chairs/3737). That wasn't even four months ago. Now, you know how these chairs with the adjustable height work...push the lever on the side to raise or lower it. I had it set to my preferred height when I put it together, and haven't touched it since. So last week I go to sit down, and I hear a "whoosh" and feel the pressure drop as I'm lowered to pretty much as far down to the ground as the chair can go. Not cool. Not only did it make for some uncomfortable laptop interplay, but I could've been hurt had I not been aware of what was going on!  Now, you also know that I'm aware of how retail works. I understand the "30-day return policy with receipt (and packaging, which is in the fine print)", and I had my receipt. But that's all I saved. Wish I woulda saved the damn warranty info. But I was gonna try anyway. All I wanted was a friggin' exchange. And since I had to go to Big Lots today anyway for an extension cord, I figured I may as well inquire about my chances with the chair. And here's where every facet of logistics in retail goes to hell. I grabbed the cord I needed, and took no less than three laps around the aisles of the store. Yeah, sometimes I just like to walk around to see what the deals are and what they've got, but not today. I was on a mission to find anyone in a black polo shirt that didn't have a paw attached to a cash register. I finally settled in the furniture section in front of my chair. They still had it in stock and on display. Sweet. Finally I spot an older gentleman and say "I have a question about this chair, but I probably need to speak to a manager about an exchange." He explains that he is, in fact, the furniture department manager and what I needed...only to agree with me that I needed to speak to the store manager, but she's busy and if I go up front, the cashier will call her for me. With a tone of "yeah, that's not gonna happen" and a tiny side of "I'm gettin' outta here, good effin' luck ".Which was fine. I figured I'd pay for my cord and have the beard behind the computer (I mean, why do we still call them registers anymore...they're all freakin' computers now anyway ?) call the manager. And sure enough, who ends up in line behind me to cash out about a minute later? The manager of the furniture department. Finally I cash out, and the beard calls the manager. She calls back and tells the beard to tell me she's really busy but she'll be out in a minute. Which makes me wonder how a freakin' Big Lots manager can be so busy? No one works the floor, no one cleans it, the shelves are empty...what kind of party am I interrupting? While waiting, I learned a new math theory. One "Big Lots Minute" = Ten "Real Life Minutes". Try that one out yourself the next time you have ten minutes of your life you can waste. Hey, I may know I'm in the wrong and asking a lot out of these people to help me out, but I also know you never keep a customer waiting. Finally, "she" comes out. And I only know it's a "she" because when her slightly chubby, sexually ambiguous figure used its mouthpiece to address me, it sounded like she'd swallowed a 4-year-old girl with the purpose of having her do all of her speaking. I explained to her my situation, very calm and polite-like. And of course she shot me down. Gladly I didn't take the chair apart just to take it back home...but it's not like I was gonna go home without a resolution anyway. I've been on the other end of the game so many times, I was determined to get what I wanted. I said "Look, I got the chair less than four months ago. I have the receipt. It's still under manufacturer's warranty. I don't have the box, and I don't need the box the one comes in if you just exchange it. I don't want my money back; I just want to exchange it for one that works." And it didn't come down to it, but I was prepared to go next-level on her if I needed to. I was already picturing myself contacting corporate...thankfully, I didn't have to. Miss 4-year-old crankypants changed her tune. Offered me an exchange. I said no problem. I'll go home, get the chair, get the receipt, and get this fucking over with. We drive a Saturn Ion. There's no effin' way this chair's getting into the car in one piece; luckily the back and the part you place your butt on separate from the pole, base and wheels. Luckily I could get the back/butt into the backseat. Didn't think that was gonna happen. And I'm on my way. And here's where it turns into ridiculous, unintentional comedy. I pull up and park in front of the store, grab the base and head on in...at what could've been the worst possible time for any manager (especially this time of year): Her cigarette break. But I don't care. This is my $79 broken birthday present, and you're not gonna deny me. I say, "I'm back with the chair" and she looks at me, and says incredulously, "You only brought the wheels?" Am I stupid, lady? Really? Did you want me to stand in a dark parking lot in 30-degree cold and try to struggle to put it back together? C'mon man! Of course I'm gonna make two effin' trips.So we finally get back into the store, and she tell me to grab another one and she'll do the exchange. I go to the furniture department, spot the display of my chair, and all the boxes for sale are gone. Empty. Miraculously, I spot an employee, point to the chair, and ask him where they are. He tells me they're over a few feet. Cool. I grab one, and notice it's priced at $99, although the display still says "Sale- $79". Figuring that's the case, I head to the register. The beard has all sorts of confusion trying to process the sale, so he calls over Miss 4-year-old crankypants again, who determines I've grabbed the wrong chair. Well, I grabbed what I was told to grab, so whatever, and no, I'm not paying $20 more for a high-back chair. I'm 5'6" without the God Complex, so what do I need a chair that big for? So she called her furniture guy to bring me the right chair. Only, he brought the $59 chair. I pointed this out, and I could tell this "woman" was starting to stew. First she probably thinks I'm trying to scam her out of a better chair (I wasn't...it was an honest mistake). Now she probably thinks I'm trying to get money from them (and I wasn't...I just wanted what I came in with, only one that works), because she told me I wasn't getting the difference if I took the lesser-valued chair. Which, if I wasn't so damned determined, still wouldn't be good enough. Not for my time and travel over something Jess spent good money on and has become an inconvenience. One more time, the furniture lackey went back, this time to "check the stockroom". Finally, he got it right. "Someone must've buried it in the back" he says, implying it's the last one (and hence, no longer available on their website). I get my package, and I can finally go home. And this epic debacle isn't over with just yet. I get ready to open the box so I can assemble it. There seemed to be more tape than usual securing the package at the top. When I opened it up, there was no plastic baggage around the back and butt part. The base pole was shrinkwrapped instead of being held in place by cardboard fillings. The wheels were in a large ziploc bag. The screws? Small ziploc bag. WTF!! I get the last one, and it's already been assembled?? I tell myself it can't be the case as I try to assemble it...without directions. But at this point, everything else has been a clusterfuck. After getting the arms, butt and back together, I came to realize by the imprints of the plate of the pole attachment in the butt of the chair that it had, in fact, been assembled once before. But fuck it, if it works, I'm keeping it. And so far, it does. I've dealt with it enough. I'll take my chances. They were eventually kind enough to replace it then and there, and finally did, when they could've told me to screw myself (like I'm sure they wanted to). And I know, I know. I know what you're all gonna tell me, as I would tell all of you. You don't go to the dentist who also changes oil. If you want a quality product, pay the money and get it from someone who knows what they're doing...and don't buy crap on the cheap from someone who sells everyone else's "I can't sell these; here, you take 'em". CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Back in the day, there were no Targets or Walmarts in The 'Lo. If you wanted to shop at a big-box discount retailer, you went here. And it was frowned upon if you were spotted there. The worst insult you could hear on the elementary school bus back then was "You got that at K-mart last night!", which spawned the best comeback in history: "How would you know I was at K-mart? You were there too if you saw me there." Ahhh, the days of my youth. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X96Un6POoo8 Don't ask me where I got this from; I'll never reveal my sources. VITAL STATS  Lost in the drama of Big Lots today was the fact that the outside of the house's decorations have been started (hence, me running out to get an extension cord among other things I needed to go elsewhere for). I must stress that it was very unintentional that I missed the extravagant plans Jess had in place for this occasion. She described it, laid it out, and decided we needed more things. So since Big Lots is in the same plaza as Tops (our closest non-discount grocery megastore), I made it a combined trip. When Big Lots didn't have what we needed, the closest Walgreens down the street did. And what did all of that lead up to? Me not getting Griswald'd by trying to finangle her plans in with just what we had. Or, in her words, intentionally skipping out on helping decorate. Saw a commercial for this, and I almost kinda want it! https://www.timelife.com/6mdm I loved that show when I was a kid, and actually had a Barbie-sized doll of him. This was after they shrunk GI JOE dolls into "action figures", but before GI JOE was an actual cartoon. And I used to want to take it to bed with me, but I was too little and, well, it was kinda dangerous. Let alone a 5-year-old taking a doll of a man to bed with him in 1980...creepy. Anyone wanna offer to spell-check this for me? I've caught myself at least 10 times going back over stuff. Bad night at the keyboard.I think that's all I've got...I'm sure I had a little more, but this has gone on for far too long tonight, folks. I'mma hit you all up in the morning/afternoon before I go to work, cuz it's gonna be a late night tomorrow. Peace and love...GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Ahhh, welcome on a cold winter Sunday. Sundays in the fall and winter are nothing for me but watching football. I wake up, check over my fantasy football roster one last time, get all of the supplies I'll need for the day, and make sure I'm home by the 1pm kickoff to watch my Bills (more about them later). However, that was not the case today. For the first time since the start of the season, I didn't have to think about my fantasy team. Due to a combination of poor drafting, injuries, and players only producing on the field when they're stapled to my bench, team Incredibad finished the regular fantasy season last week a disappointing 6-7, which is good for 7th place and left on the outside looking in for the playoffs. So much for scouting players and matchups during the week, watching injury reports and nervously watching highlights hoping for something good. Now, for the rest of the season, I can just be a casual fan and root for my team rather than a bunch of overpayed adults playing a kids' game. It's this time of year when I wonder why I put myself through all of that and swear next year I won't...til summer rolls around, training camp opens and I get the itch for everything football again. And the Bills? Ahhh, the darlings at the start of the year! Shot out of the gate with a couple of upset and come-from-behind wins over some big teams, they really had us captivated and #Billieving. The cries that "Nobody circles the wagons like the Buffalo Bills!" were back loud and clear. Fitzmagic was for real with his beard and Amish rifle. FredEx was delivering the rock and leading the league in rushing. We finally had a team! And as usual, the injuries pile up, opposing teams catch on, and the inevitable tailspin begins. I don't even know where to begin with this team. I'll never stop being a fan, but when will I get tired of the emotional investment I make year-in and year-out? The "playoffs on life support" had their plug mercifully (and resoundingly) pulled by San Diego...and it seems that nobody circles the drain like the Buffalo Bills. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Perhaps no other Christmas song serves the dual purpose of providing a little laughter while unknowingly mocking my football season. You definitely won't hear this in stores. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rg66j0fUbUk&feature=related VITAL STATS: So justjessica1 and I are both off work Monday. She's resting off a headache after working and running errands. Word around the house is we're gonna decorate for Christmas. Fearless Prediction: She'll sleep most of the afternoon while I start bringing up boxes of glittery, Xmas-y decor. She'll wake up and be too tired to decorate. I'll try to not express frustration. Loooooooove yooooooouuu! Hey! Wish The StoryMaster  a happy birthday today!  Well, at least I still have the...uhhhh, never mind. The Sabres will struggle to make the playoffs. It's gonna be a long winter. Arguably, maybe one of the worst things about Christmas is that damn near every decoration, ornament and piece of decor is made of at least 10% glitter, and when I say glitter I don't mean this: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0118589/...that at least goes away when you change the channel. I mean the shiny, sparkly stuff that clings to your skin no matter how much you shower and try to brush it off. Working in retail, I'm convinced that due to all the crap we sell for the holidays, I'll be so sparkly that people might need to wear sunglasses around me until at least April.Ahhh, well, I'll leave it all at that for tonight folks. Thanks for stopping by...and I hope the work and/or school week is pleasant to ya. GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| Happy Saturday people! Allow me to speak on a subject I'm very familiar with: My Writing Style. It's been described in many ways throughout the years (mostly complimentary). I thought I'd offer my take on it. It's pretty conversational, but in a way where I'm telling you a one-sided story. I say "conversational" because the way you read it is pretty much exactly how I would tell you in person what's going on, only without you interjecting . Imagine a phone conversation, only neither of us knows the mic on your phone doesn't work and I think you're just letting me ramble and get all my points out. And then I hang up after like, 10 seconds of awkward silence . Why am I bothering to bring this up? Well, it appears this little crumb of internet pastry has been nominated for the title of WDC's Best Blog of 2011. Uhhhh, WHAT?? I came across that little bit of info while reading the other nominee (to date), Julie D - PUBLISHED! 's "Invalid Item" . Maybe I should go through my email a little better and see if I already knew this. When I texted justjessica1 to let her know and her response was (and I quote verbatim) "Get the motherfn out!! I'm so proud of you baby!!", my guess is No, I don't believe I knew that.So what is all of the hullabaloo about? Well, I came across this: "The Quills" . Apparently, WDC has an "award ceremony" every year where members can nominate different items in different categories, and the winning item receives some sort of award within the site and all of the love that comes with it. Am I stoked? I'll quote the response I had to Jess the CWC (again, verbatim), "Hellz yeah! Thanks!" Here's the proof: "Invalid Item" ...scroll down a little to the "Best Blogs" category. You'll see me. I appreciate the respect. "The Quills" is the WDC equivalent of the Oscars, Grammys, Tonys, and all the other great creative awards. Only slightly, ummm, less prestigious? Yeah, that's it. And I'm not even about to get into handicapping who might win. We need a few more blogs to be nominated before any of us is considered for an award. So all y'all other bloggers in the WDC community need to step up!! Because I don't like my chances when it's just me vs. Jules. So what I'm thinking (in terms of helping my chances) is that all of my friends that read this that aren't on WDC should becomes members. Why? Cuz it's free. And then if you wanna comment on it, you can comment here on WDC. And I think more comments from the WDC community will help my chances. Grassroots, ya know? Now if you'll excuse me, I've gotta bang out the rest of this entry so I can hit up kiyasama about cashing in my gift certificate to her sign shop and get me an image to commemorate this little bit of good news. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! Even though it's horrible in the video-quality department, and it's been around for years and still gets played regularly, you can't deny that this is one of the best Christmas songs of the initial pop/punk generation. Catchy. Snarky. What more could I be asking for in my determination to give you some of the best non-traditional music of the season? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3xEopHCtEUo VITAL STATS:  I knew I shouldn't have opened my mouth during a Sabres game. Started talkin' when they were flying sround during the 2nd period of a tied hockey game. Then they lose, 4-1. Man, that's a cold walk to the car tonight for the fans at the FN Center made even colder. While I enjoy being able to sleep in a little before I go to work, I believe I slept in too much. I was not ready for the work environment at 10am, even though I was in bed before 11pm. Too much sleep is not a good thing, apparently. Two days off, however, when coupled with a third day when I can sleep in and actually wake up and get acclimated to the day before I go back to work...now that's a remedy.Ok folks, I'm out. Gotta grab a bite to eat and then try to catch some SNL tonight...a guy I went to high school with will be Katy Perry's drummer for her musical spots. How freakin' sweet is that gig? He's toured with a lot of other nationally-known artists before. Y'all have a wonderful weekend...GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
| What's up people? Sorry if I seem a little out of it...after an absolutely shitty day at work, I figured I deserved a damn good dinner. And since no one else is home, I can get away with it. Now, before the meal sets in and I'm rendered useless in front of the tv barely able to consume adult beverages while watching hockey, I'll share it with you. My buddy G-Stamm's girl's family basically are http://www.sausageguys.com/, runnin' their little deli in The 'Lo, and they sell a phenomenal product...hot chicken breast. Think traditional deli-style chicken breast slices that you'd put on a sang-wich, but it's coated and injected with Frank's Red Hot sauce. Mouth watering, indeed. So I get me a jalapeno/cheddar tortilla wrap, pile on a couple thick slices of the chicken, add some Ro-Tel canned tomatoes with diced chiles, top it with some Rootie's bleu cheese dressing, shredded cheddar and a little dousing of the almighty Frank's Red Hot, wrap it up, throw it in the toaster oven to warm it up and melt the cheese, and . Appetite fulfilled, fo' sho. Or, as G-Stamm translates for my Mexican readers, "por supuesto!" (Never thought the blog arena here would get all bilingual on ya, did ya? Did ya?!?)Needless to say, I'm stuffed beyond comprehension. And I mean that when I say that...when I'm full, I lose about 30% of my brain's capacity to function properly. Normal things that happen out of muscle memory can go awry. I become a walking, babbling, sleepy creature. But a damn satisfied one. And as good as they are, I need to lay off them. That's the third hot chicken wrap I've had this week, and my digestive tract, I believe, is preparing to secede from the rest of my body after all of the heat it's been fed. But I dare say, it's amazing how a good meal can rapidly turn a day around. CHRISTMAS MUSICAL BREAK!! A fitting song for a food coma, which many of you I'm sure will suffer from at one point or another this holiday season. Also fitting? I work a rare mid-shift tomorrow, so not only will I be hitting the sheets a little early tonight, I'll be able to sleep in a little as well. Only the hardest of the die-hard fans of this band will know this song. For the members of their fan club, every year or so around the holidays they would send their members a limited-edition 7" vinyl single featuring rare and otherise-unreleased material. This was among one of their first gifts to members. Years later it appeared on their 2-cd "rarities" collection. Enjoy! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CzjgMXseMvg VITAL STATS:  I'll resist every urge to blog during the Sabres' game as soon as I shut this down. Especially after the last debacle, when the Sabres blew a 3-0 lead against the hated Flyers and lost in OT, 5-4. While I'm in the local plugging spirit (and this commercial is on during a break in the game), check out this website if you're like me and you love cheese. http://www.yanceysfancy.com/ Great cheese, great recipes...mmmmm, cheeeese.... Interesting article in The Buffalo News' Gusto section regarding local Christmas music. http://www.buffalonews.com/entertainment/gusto/music/concert-previews/article665... I'll have to check some of that out, since some of the shows happen practically down the street from me.Alright, I'm done. Time to veg. Go Sabres. And GOODNIGHT NOW!! |
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