What a wonderful picture you painted with your words, of what one perfect moment was like. I like how you brought the poem to an end with him loving you and you loving him. There is nothing more beautiful than two people in love. I think I would like to see this poem in color, my suggestion only. A great job, your words flow beautifully.
Oh this story is so very very funny. I don't think I will ever look at a red pen without thinking of this story and Penny.I think if I was you I would keep the red pen for luck, it was not penny's fault she ran out of ink. I so enjoy your writing style. I see no errors. Thank you !
Very nice. I enjoyed this short story. It is so perfect for children. I can see it as an illustrated book. It has great potential. The poor dogie up the tree, how afraid he must have been Smart Mom getting the fire truck. The only suggestion I would make and it is just my option, I think the dog should have a name. Your writing talent shine through in this story.
Honey, I feel your hurt.. I feel your heartache. I hope things will work out for you, but only if the person will care for you in the way you deserve to be cared for. I feel you have a low self image when you wrote, "do you think you could care for someone as hideous as me".Think highly of your self. I hope you are enjoying writing.com
Wow, this poem touches my heart It is heart wrenching. I am so sorry that a disease has destroyed so much in your life. I am sorry that it caused trouble in your relationship. I will say that if you keep writing it will help heal things for you. Know that I care, and will be praying for you and yours
Shannon the poem about your ex made me a little sad..that is not the way love should be. I hope you have moved on and found someone that will treat you like a princess, that is what you deserve. The questions you posed in your poem were good ones, but I am doubtful that your ex will ever answer them. FF
Oh I can relate to this poem.. It is funny and I laughed through out the reading of it. I guess with the cold weather we all have our nerves on edge. I like the rhyming in this poem. Don't you hate having the covers taken off you while in bed. I know I do!Have a nice night.FF
A beautiful prose filled with love and romance. A great job with your descriptive writing. I especially love the expression "With rose petals and perfume. You have touched my senses, as I can smell the beautiful aroma of the flower and perfume. Once again a very strong ending. I am sure you will do well here on Writing.com
What a mouth watering picture you have painted here of Hannah's. I love visiting Fredericksburg, and the very next time I am in Texas I will visit the area. I will also drop in to sign your guest book in person and get to meet you personally. What a pleasure it will be..I can smell the heavenly food now in my mind. My daughter lives in San Marcos, and although I live in New Brunswick Canada, I see her once a year.
What a pleasure to read this poem on your dreams. You have done a great job telling us the things you dream for. I like the last verse very much, but one of the main things I dream for and often pray about is inner peace, and joys that never cease. Congratulation on your awardicon.This poem is soooo worthy of it.
Oh hon, I would say you are hooked on Writing.com. There are so many people here on this site that will befriend anyone at all..we all have the same thing in common that is not only writing, but enjoying our fellow authors friendships and being built up with the comments we receive in our reviews.I love this site.
Olivia, this could well be a true story for many people and maybe for your self. In your opening you took us directly to the main character..the man with eyes that were dark as Texas thunderstorms. Eyes that pierced to your very being. So many women, even married ones are terribly lonely. Loneliness and pain are one of the main reason so many are tempted to go astray. Everyone deserve to be loved and to be showed that love. I feel certain this could be developed to a great story/ novel..as if truthful most of us women have felt this way at one time or another. This is a heartfelt prose, it touched my heart and emotions here.
You amaze me..you seem to weave any topic into a beautifully woven tapestry.
Raising a child is one of the hardest jobs their is but the pleasure from their love far exceeds any hardships.I believe as a parent we suffer more than a child does from any bruise they receive or from their scraped knees. I am sure you are glad he is onlyfour..they grow up way to fast.
What a pleasure to get to know you a bit and to marvel at talent..the gift of writing.
What a way with words..you are so gifted it is a pleasure to take a peek at a few of your items. I appreciate how you could use a rose never fading to memories far gone. Memories of a History of strong love now facing the fact that the past is gone. It is very painful when a love dies. I am sorry if this happened to you. A nice job rhyming here. I'm your reviewer in "REVIWERS ON THE GO."
There isn't anything as lovely as young love. You captured this in the words of this poem..How beautiful you recalled the walk home from the bar in the brisk autumn night. You writing shimmers with delightful colors as you took us through the various seasons. I can picture the moonlight, the stars, the orange and yellow leaves. I love how you told us about fall turning to winter... and the youthful passion starting to slow. Your ending is so often true that your love was simply youthful lust, that went the way of dust. I'm your reviewer in "REVIWERS ON THE GO."
I really enjoyed this poem. I like how you told us the things that you will never know or have such as the taste of her sweet lips, her laughing at your quips and so on.. Going on you told us what she would miss out on., next on to what you both are going to miss out of...but the part that really makes this poem are your two last line. Quite qa surprised ending! Your writing talents shine through brightly.
Good Evening Mitch this is Funnyface. I'm your reviewer in "REVIWERS ON THE GO." . I am so sorry you lossed your Pugsly to kidney failure. He was such a young dog to die. I am an animal lover especially of dogs so I know the sadness that you and your wife endured.Treasure his memories, as he sure is majestic here in this photo.
Our Earth Angels are some of the best on this site. Thank you for listing yours. I know many many of yours and they are indeed earth angels.Don't forget you also are an earth Angel to so many here on this site. I love how you use images with your writing.
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Highwind is indeed a true friend to many of us on the site. I am sure her heart was touched when she read the sweet words honoring and thanking her for giving her friendship to you. I love the image you have at the beginning of this poem. friends are flowers growing in the heart. A beautiful way of showering your friends with love.
Sherri this poem makes me recall the old saying if it doesn't feel right take a second to reconsider. Yet in fairness he might be just insure.I wish you all the best in which ever way you go. Your writing talent shines throughout the writing of this poem. You have expressed great emotions here.
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Sherri what a wonderful poem written about your Mother. A mother's love is so important and I am happy you have precious memories to recall on when you are missing her. I do believe she will be sitting on a cloud waiting for you to come home to her.What a wonderful daughter you are. the love for your Mother shines through in your words. Simply a lovely job here.
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Good morning Melizabeth, I choose to read your poem here because of the title. It is always such a hard thing to trust anyone, even our Lord. If we could have perfect faith it would be easy. I like the struggle you had befote making the commitment to trust the Lord. Very inspiring. I see no errors!
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Beautifully written. I like how you told us the various things you have from God's creation, sun, moon, earth and environment. I also like how you describe the sky, ocean and the flowers. They are indeed beautiful because God did create them. I see no errors.
Good Morning friendship.. Healthy kids is a nice subject to write about. Healthy kids are happy children. I am not sure what the stands for but, it is so important for children to eat properly. They should get out in the fresh air and sunlight. It gives their skin color and a healthy complexion. I hope you are enjoying Writing.com.
Heart wrenching. I know when people are young they do so many things on a dare. I can only imagine how the person that fired the gun must of felt..how it would affect the lives of so many people. The family of the little girl, the family of the shooter as well as the shooter. There are so many using arms today, who knows who will be next. You are very compassioned and caring lady.
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