Just passing through and this piece caught my eye. But, wait a minute. It's WdC Superpower Reviewers Summer Cookout Raid! So, let me tarry awhile and read this intriguing work of yours.
Here are some comments you might consider when you decide to revisit it for tightening and improvement. My observations and suggestions are enclosed in brackets and color-coded green.
Great story. It's worth cleaning up and tightening for conciseness, brevity, clarity and readability.
As far as *Mechanics,*Syntax, Spelling, and *Punctuation Marks are concerned, here are some snippets I cut and pasted that need tweaking for errors and minor fixes:
[ Never the less] [Nevertheless is one word]
As a teenager, just learning the skill of driving,[ It][it] was thrilling to be completely lost on back roads, never knowing where you'll actually come out and find a main road or a tiny little town.[Replace capital "I" with lower case (i)]
As I got further along on a very narrow[,][delete] dirt road lined with tall pine trees[,] [Insert] I suddenly became aware of how dark it was getting.
Revised sentence after transposing commas: Does this sound better?
As I got further along on a very narrow dirt road lined with tall pine trees, I suddenly became aware of how dark it was getting.
four-way intersection [Hyphenate compound words]
Not even [a] click. [Insert]
The wheel refused to turn, the power was like something was sucking and draining is [slowly][slow].
It took all my strength to force the car to the side [of ][off]the road where it again died.[Replace]
[ no where] [nowhere is one word]
Now, is probably a good time to admit, one of the few rules Mom had for allowing me use of the car was, I was NOT to leave the city limits.[This sounds awkward. Try to revise for clarity and readability.]
"Lord," I prayed fervently, and as is typical of a desperate soul pleading for help from the Almighty, I made desperate promises if only He would get me out of this trouble.
[ my Mother] [ my mother] [Rule: Do not put on upper case mother, father, mom, dad when a pronoun precedes it.]
"...he launched himself [though] [through] my door," [Replace]
[over sized ] [oversized is one word]
[down pour] [downpour is one word]
[deep throat-ed growl] [deep throated growl] [Remove hyphen]
[ beat up] [ beat-up [Hyphenate]
One on my side, and I didn't really notice [there] [where] the others went. [Replace "there" with "where"]
I was about to do as he said, when I noticed his two friends had come around to the passenger side [was were][Delete wordiness] reaching out to open the doors.
Did they know[,] see[,] or hear how serious this dog was sounding? [Insert commas for clarity and readability]
The light rain had stopped, rays of morning light were starting to break [though][through] the darkness. [Replace with correct syntax]
Try to employ dialogue to show your characters interacting with each other. Dialogue puts the reader in the head of the narrator, character, or author. It beats the monotony of reading a boring narrative.
I hope my observations and suggestions can help you tighten some loose ends relating to the mechanics in writing. Keep in mind, though, that these are from one reader's point of view. As such, take it with a grain of salt. The decision to adopt or discard suggestions is your prerogative.
*Over-all take away
What a scary episode you encountered on a stormy night. Your faith in God gave you the courage and presence of mind to survive a nightmarish experience. Because you called out to God for help, he sent you an angel of a dog to save you from three potential evildoers. God does answer prayers in the most unusual circumstance and in a mysterious way!
Wow! I see wonderful lessons you learned from this experience.
Write away, Writerlady. You have great potential for success in the wordsmithing world.
Image #2023081 over display limit. -?-