\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED ITEMS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/nixie9/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4
Review Requests: OFF
3,620 Public Reviews Given
3,659 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Template most of the time, covering setting/plot/characters/conflict/resolution if applicable. For shorter works, I concentrate more on feelings evoked.
I'm good at...
Short story, chapter reviews and in-depth reviews.
Favorite Genres
Sci-fi, Romance, mystery, children's, comedy
Least Favorite Genres
Historical
Favorite Item Types
Short stories, novel chapters
Least Favorite Item Types
essay, editorial, non-fiction, somebody's homework assignment
I will not review...
*Bulletb* XGC, *Bulletb* Items that are written in a small font with little or no spacing, *Bulletb* I am unable to review any pieces involving abuse of any kind to anyone. I like to keep my corner or the world happy, because I grew beyond my "challenges" of childhood and don't want to look back.
Public Reviews
Previous ... 3 -4- 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 ... Next
76
76
Review of Simply C ~ Notes  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Mara ♣ McBain Congratulations on your 18 years of membership.

*Mushroombr*Introducing~~
An eclectic collection of C-notes. Sometimes I wonder if C-notes are still popular among members. The notes are great because they can quickly convey the overall feeling of emotions.

*Mushroombr* The comments
All the notes vary in style, which I found interesting. I looked at the first one and concluded the collection would be similar. Wrong.

*Mushroombr* The second note is a flourishing image that somehow made me think of a door mat, as if the sender were stomping detritus from their shoes before entering a home. That doesn't sound welcoming at all. So, I'll amend my statement. The image is simply elegant.

*Mushroombr*
Let's look at all the C-notes!

Next, we're tossed into anime, with a super-cute title.

This sounds so dramatic...the friends forever is stunning, both in message and image.

And then we're back to warm and fuzzy.

The Happy Birthday note is alive with joy and enthusiasm. Unless, a person is like me, one who doesn't want their birthday remembered.

After the yellow congrats, the reader is once again cocooned in the fuzziness of more bear images. Each has its own message.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
You've quite the collection here. Something for everyone.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*
77
77
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Nikola- pray for Texas Congratulations on your 21 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
The title was misleading, in a good way. The song naturally came to mind, and I held my breath, unsure if I wanted to read about anything where a babe was harmed. Then I remembered where I was (WdC the safe home) and read the brief description. Since memory didn't serve, I had to look up boughs because in my mind, the song went 'when the bough' breaks.

*Mushroombr* The comments
From the beginning I thought this short would be a personification of a tree watching others falling around it. My heart was slowly splintering, but I had to readjust when I came across the word (aunt). That didn't change the desperation expressed here.

The short also reminded me of people losing other people close to them. Watching loved ones age or simply passing away.

A few years ago, I lost four trees in a storm, and this place has never been the same since then.

*HeartG* Personal connection
Willow trees are special to me because my dad know how much I loved them, and planted one right outside my bedroom window. I liked to hide underneath the branches. Some trees have stood for hundreds of years, and I often wonder how much knowledge they acquire.

*Mushroombr* Suggestions
Larger font, please

*Questiong* Why is art the first genre?

*Mushroombr* Final observations
Excellent job, bringing the introduction to the last paragraph, completing the story arc.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
78
78
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Brenpoet. Congratulations on your 23 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
I rather dreaded reading this tribute because it hit so close to home. Leukemia stole my sister in 1984, at the same age as your daughter. My sister was 30 years old. And all these years later, maybe the pain isn't stabbing my heart. Sometimes it's hollow and cold, at other times I feel her consoling me.

*Mushroombr* The comments
I liked the repetition of the phrase "Much more than you ever knew." But I have to disagree. I'm thinking Lucy felt all that love, although you had doubts. I absolutely cannot imagine losing a daughter. That's not the way things are supposed to happen, is it? When my sister died, my parents never overcame the loss. No one was allowed to speak her name. It seems an unusual response to grief, but I guess you had to know what it was like growing up.

*Mushroombr* Final observations

I liked the bold font. The simple rhyming was perfect for this tribute. The quiet subtly lent itself to the quiet experience expressed here.

Hopefully, I haven't brought the world crashing down on you. For me, it would be comforting that someone cared enough to read about my sister. Maybe it's the same for you. I'm sure this poem wasn't easy to pen. Where is your sorrow now? A dull ache?

Anyhow, thanks for writing this and bringing my sister back to me, if only for a few moments.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
79
79
Review of Lost  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Greetings, RatDog. I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Overall impression
The title and brief description spelled out what I was about to read. I prefer something more subtle to establish a mystery or curiosity.

From the beginning, I fell in love with the grandfather. The opening scene is meant to be warm, and that's what I felt. I enjoyed reading about his wanderings, despite the confusion. A special treat?*Right* the grandfather connecting his thoughts with memories of music.

*Vine1*
Stand-outs
There is someone above the clouds who takes care of them all.
I was already lost in sorrow when I came upon this sentence. In his befuddlement, the grandfather channeled through half-forgotten memories and drew the conclusion. For some reason, I found this sentence the most poignant of them all.

*Vine2*
Personal connection
I can't stop the review without adding in a memory of my dad. The family suspected his mind was going, and we received the proof in an upsetting way. He went for a drive and hours later he still hadn't returned. He lost his way, pulled into a stranger's driveway and asked for help from a couple. He was so confused, he asked the husband to drive his own car home, and the wife followed in their family car.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
Although the story was well-told, it felt scanty in detail. Then I noticed this was written for something specific--a chapter. And that made more sense. There's the beginning of the story that can go anywhere. Well done!

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
80
80
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Greetings, sindbad I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Overall impression
I can't say why I chose to read this article. It has nothing to do with me. But I liked the clear and concise writing style, which carried me through to the conclusion.

What I could relate to was remembering my career from years ago. The worker's comp manager adored me. (Yes, I looked up that word because I only thought of it as applied to the worship of God.)

My manager trusted me with special accounts and printed up business cards for me. All of this was way out of my job description, and my direct manager found ways to sabotage me for years.

Leaders are often promoted because they possess a high degree of skill and expertise in a given area...
So very true...and yes, communication is the key.

I thought the title was unusual, but it does stop the repetition of (you).

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
I found your article compelling and informative. I hope someone, somewhere comes across this and sees it as a useful tool. Did you write it for something/someone specific?

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
81
81
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings, E.S. I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Overall impression
"Sadness within me " Open in new Window. is an incredibly tragic monologue. Excellent words choices enlivened the narrative, and I kept nodding my head, thinking "I have similar feelings." This brought me closer to the ideas expressed here.

The flow was natural and, from paragraph to paragraph, unrolled with ease. However, there was no ease in the mental wanderings. I can imagine how many readers would relate to this, and that is depressing in and of itself.

Not one line was repetitive, an impressive feat, considering the topic was consistent throughout. The mood was overwhelming because the feelings ran so deeply, embedded in the conscious mind.

*Vine1*
Observations/oops
*Idea* Two thoughts for you.
It would help the reader if this was written in a larger font (I use 3.5). Also, correct paragraphing would make for an easier read.

The work was marked as a chapter. Is there more to come in your personal saga?

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
I have to say I'm sorry you feel this way, even though those words are empty. On a super-personal note, have you considered some counseling to help you through this? It hurts to think of a person out there, alone. One more observation. Consider filling out your bio and port tabs. It makes reviewing easier.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
82
82
Review of Last gasp  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Greetings, Sumojo I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Overall impression
What an unsuspected setting! Elderly ladies at a swimming pool? Great job drawing in the reader. A crime concerning swimmers?

*Vine2*
Diving in
Excellent work showing us who Dave was. He came across as resigned, melancholy, and sad. The dip into his past, the chlorine reminding him of his childhood, worked as a brief demonstration for rounding out the character.

I had zero trouble visualizing the setting. Of course I can't 'see' the characters, but that's what it felt like. I was in the plot, watching all of them. The intricacies of police work felt accurate and vibrant.

*Vine1*
Observations/oops
He Arrived
He arrived

No-one
No one

*Idea*
I have an idea. What about using italics to show feelings? It will bring the reader deeper into your plot-a more intimate relationship with the character.
and he felt he was wasting his time.
What a waste of time.

Title- Last gasp
Last Gasp

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
I've never attempted to write a mystery/crime story before. You worked in every detail as the mystery unfolded. I'm impressed. Nicely done.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
83
83
Review of I Like Trees  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings, G. B. Williams I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
I like trees too. I feel comforted in their presence, thinking about all the wisdom they've gathered over the years.

*Vine1*
Observations
Each line adds another layer to the author's affinity with trees. Each line is unique. Here I found many of my thoughts about trees.

Some people struggle to be more, as if who they are is lacking. Society presses this upon us. Do better. Do more. This line expressed the opposite, the truth.

I like trees because they never attempt to be anything but trees.

The reader also finds a bit of psychology for helping people. Generally, we see this expressed as 'choose your battles.' A person can cling to who they think they are, without making room for another's opinion or truism. Best to remember, one person cannot change who the other is.
I like trees because most know when to bend.

*Vine1*
Out on a limb.
I prefer no exclamation marks. I'd also like to see, in the last line, LIKE written as like.

*Vine2*
The crowning glory
"I like trees because they help me to understand people!"

Respectfully,
An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
84
84
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Greetings, Jeff I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
In the beginning
Well, I didn't know what to expect from this story, but I like the way you write and present your stories. Also, I wondered why I was reading a Round 2 tale without reading round one.

*Vine1*
Observations
What I discovered was that I didn't need Round 1 to orient me. The plot stood on its own. The writing was exceptional. Fantasy of this sort isn't a draw for me, but once I began reading, I couldn't stop.

*Vine2*
Plot/character points
The characters carried the plot and the plot carried the characters. The action/adventure wasn't overly dramatic, but I liked the pacing and the surprises you left around a few corners.

Central to the plot was the relationship between Eldon and Rex. They both obviously cared for each other, but the emphasis was on Eldon taking care of precious Rex. What a beautiful moment when Eldon gave Rex a rest from flying.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
I had my doubts about the wrap-up, the water droplets draining the life force and all that. But Eldon (and you) relieved my concern with the mention of someone who could help them gain back their souls.

*Right*One of my favorite lines
“C’mon, boy,” Eldon said, scratching Rex’s scales right under the chin.

I shocked myself by reviewing this, and that's a testimony to your outstanding writing, Jeff.

Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
85
85
Review of Signs  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi Purple Catching Up Nixie here, reviewing this item for "I Write in 2024" Open in new Window.. I think this is the first time your story popped up for me to review.

*Burstg*
In the beginning
At forty, I hate to say it, but sledding is not a good idea. But you included the anticipatory glee emanating from your inner child, and that was all the reader needed to catch on.

*Burstg*
Buried in snow
Oh, how I miss those snow storms. But, as you wrote here, the downside can be limiting. My entire car has been buried under snow. As a kid, we had huge outside doors in our basement, and they were completely covered.

*Burstg*
Connecting the dots
Do I believe in signs? You betcha'. At the moment, I can't think of one, so I experienced yours vicariously. In the meantime, I can relate to the snow. One year, while living n NYS, I had a broken foot and had to dig out my Camaro. The snowplow inevitably arrived soon after and shoved banks of snow against my car. Another year, I lived in Maine, and we didn't even bother trying to uncover our car because we had another to drive.

*Burstg*
Adhering to the contest rules
When entering "Daily Flash Fiction Challenge" Open in new Window. there is no rule that requires prompt words to be written in bold. There are exceptions from time to time. My point being, the prompt words slotted in so elegantly, I never would have guessed. W/C was spot-on, which is no easy feat.

*Burstg*
Lasting impression
Fantastic write that reminded me of my preferred place to live. I have no doubt that the moment I hit submit, I'll remember incidents with signage.

Respectfully reviewed by

~Nixie
~Click here to join a fun reviewing group~

A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
86
86
Review of Collared Doves  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Beholden. I found your item while cruising through random reviewing. Through "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window. I've credited many of your reviews, and I'm always impressed. It's my pleasure to review this prose.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
At first the title upset me, thinking that the doves were captives, held by a collar by some awful, crazy person. The cover art is stunning.

*Vine1*
Observations
The influence of the dove has carried you through your life, much as a good friend, now lost, or a deceased person is held in someone's heart. Even without the cover art, I could visualize the dove through your beautiful description. The Google images I found were not nearly as pretty as the one depicted here.

*Vine2*Mood
The mood was melancholy, and the free verse prose read smoothly, which is a challenge for me.

*Vine1*Word selection
Many fine words were chosen to complete the prose. *Right* 'sunburnt veld' had the strongest impact on me.

*Vine2*
The investigation
The interpretation of the colors i.e. pastel for innocence, black for strength. Me, being me, I was compelled to Google the dove. I learned they have red eyes and feet. The strength you mentioned may have eluded to their strength when flying. Their flight muscles take up nearly 44% of their bodies. What strength were you referring to?

*Vine1*
Looking inside, between the lines.
In the prose, I would interpret the strength as courage or the ability to defend itself (which makes no sense) similar to moths who can change their color according to the color with the bark of a tree. Or the alluring color of poisonous frogs.

*Vine2*
Going forward
Of course there's nothing to change now, but, going forward, remember to change the first genre from 'contest entry' to 'nature' or 'experience.' Inspirational also comes to mind.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
Thank you so much for writing this haunting prose. I'm happy your past experiences live on in your mind.

Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
87
87
Review of Time passing  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Greetings, Odessa Molinari I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
I was hoping for a slip-stream story, and I found yours.

*Vine1*
Observations
Clothing from the 40's is so chic and elegant. The opening sentence showing Charmain choosing her clothing set the scene, though at the time, I didn't know what that might be.

I wasn't surprised by Charmain finding the letter in one pocket. There's nothing wrong with using a letter from the past to further the plot. Sometimes, commonplace quickly orients the reader.

*Vine2*
A new character
Wow, Fred had such a volitional reaction to Charmain wearing Irene's coat. That part was precisely what the story called for. We jumped from sweet and charming to anger.
The pace was changed. Charmain's a quick thinker. Confronted by the accusation, I'd probably freeze up.

When Charmain woke, a man in a railroad uniform may have been confusing, except you added the cell phone.

I wondered what "that's one attraction we tend not to advertise" meant. Was the train station a touristy place? The description was beautiful and romantic.

*Vine1*
Oops.
"Your not Irene." (You're)
Capitalize 'Passing' in the title.

Something to laugh about. My eyes saw Charmain as Charmin, as in TP.

*Burstg* Larger font, please.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
"You met Fred." clinched the conclusion.

Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
88
88
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Greetings, Ricardo I found your item while cruising through random reviewing. Welcome to the most wondrous website for writers. I hope happiness and a sense of community comes to you, as it has for so many others.

*Vine1*
In the beginning
What a grand title, mirroring a few of my thoughts. I live a life of simplicity, a minimalist by nature. Items purchased soon lose the feeling of 'bright and shiny', whereas what we observe and practice becomes part of us.

*Vine2*
Observations
Plants. Some can be quite spiteful. I have a plant that refuses to accept water, which insults me. So, I remembered my mom telling me that she told her plants how much she hated them, yet they still bloomed. I used a similar approach, and now my plant is grateful and I am relieved.

*Vine2*
Questions
Can you help me understand the following? Do you see why I'm confused?
The Great Snow appears from nowhere. How can I explain this so it makes sense? How does heavy snow relate to a specific season? And why did a prediction of heavy snow prompt you to find the definition of 'great snow.' It was as if you'd heard the term already. I googled 'heavy snow' and found nothing the only mention was the Great Snow of 1717 and other non-related definitions and references.

*Vine1*
Thoughts from the ledge
Try using a larger font and correct paragraphing. I was distracted by the presentation.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
What counts the most is the rest of the story. Although loving the family by doing various things was repetitious. I understand, but maybe you could find a synonym or another way to phrase your reflections.

Your descriptions were so vivid they accentuated the exact point you were making.

My mom used to make 20 apple pies at once, and stored them in the giant freezer in our basement. When I asked her how she managed this task, she told me she thought about the happiness the pies would bring when she defrosted and served them.

What a beautiful sentiment sent from your friend. It was the perfect conclusion for the work.

Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.
*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
89
89
Review of Glass Pearl  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Greetings, Chris Breva I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
The title of items are the main draw for me, and I had to know what was meant by "Glass Pearl."

*Vine1*
Observations
Wow for Flash Fiction writing. An entire story told in only 179 that carries all the elements required? Fascinating.

Personification is my favorite literary device. But second to alliteration.
You named the clam. Excellent idea. I felt both sad and amused by Cynthia's interpretations throughout. The uncomfortable feeling made me think of a human's discomfort when something like a pebble is in their shoe.

I resent humanity's actions against nature. Here we have an innocent creature painfully pried apart. (At least that's how I imagined it feeling.) That thought didn't pan out though, because the clam was laid back and took life as it came. Something humans struggle with.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
That's not to say I would be entranced by seeing a glass pearl, but no way could I pull the clam open. This is where the irony is. Cynthia sees it only as what she first perceived. Lots of speculation here for the reader to play with. Well done.


Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
90
90
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Greetings, ChristineB I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
I chose this piece because of the title. Mostly, predictions of the weather are wrong. Chance of rain, 60%, so I tote an umbrella. It never rains.

*Vine1*
Observations
The punctuation and line breaks were awkward and difficult to follow. The weatherman is grandiose, seeming to believe he creates the weather in his head. But then he relents and apologizes.

The last line affected me the most. The jingle goes "April showers bring May flowers." But that's not what happened here. The use of May with the M capitalized was clever. It did have me singing "Come What May" from the musical Moulin Rouge. Also, I was thinking about the Roman gods.

That last stanza was glaringly uneven. Of course, you have writer's largess, and it's your choice that matters. I would have like the lines broken up a bit more, more in keeping with the formatting.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
Some say there are no seasons in Florida, but that's not completely true. Right now, we're in 'winter' with temps in the 40's. In the summer, it mostly rains. And then there's hurricane season...I digress.

The weatherman finally gives in, keeping his thoughts to himself. I hope the rain falls because it makes me sad to think of plants dying.


Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
91
91
Review of Cheaha Mountain  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings, Lou-Here By His Grace I found your item while cruising through random reviewing. I review quite a bit, but never have come across your writings.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
What exactly drew me in I don't know. I have an affinity for mountains and liked the name of the one in the title. Because the main genre was action/adventure, and the second drama, I expected just that. A few other genres come to mind
...non-fiction, biographical, nature...

*Vine2*
Waltzing through the stanzas
The pace is slow and thoughtful. We're living through the narrator's memories, as he sees what was in the theater of his mind.

At first the repetition of "Already old in the days of our fathers." threw me off, but after a third read, I liked it.

The second stanza seems to be a shift in time from memories to the present, no longer in the past. If he's already old, how can more peaks await him? Or is he on a journey of self-reflection? The brief description gave no clue. Later, in stanza two, we flip back to what is in his mind.

My world slowly devolves with steps,

This line in stanza four stood out, as if the prose was speaking to me. This is precisely the way I feel, and using the word devolves accentuated the message.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
Perhaps I missed your intentions, but I like to hear about the reader's impression. This 'prose' was a bit muddled here and there, but overall, enjoyable.

Respectfully

An owl for reviewing.

*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
92
92
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Greetings, Jeannie🌺 I found your item while cruising through random reviewing.

*Vine1*
Inciting Incident
I'm drawn to anything revolving around the Native Americans. Therefore, the title drew me in.

*Vine1*
Observations
This biographical piece, which one might expect to find dry and factual was exactly the opposite. Your light and easy manner was easy and interesting to read. I found the details of what the tribes created from their surroundings exceptionally compelling.

My favorite part was about the tribe, Ouitunya, who named the territory, and how that translates into straight. I've studied a bit of Native American culture, and this is the first instance I've come across that's laughable.

The referral links to back up your piece were included. *Checkg*

*Vine1*
Personal connection. Our family never knew we were building our new house on a sacred Mohawk burial site, in NYS. All siblings and parents experienced supernatural events. Those memories worry me today.

oops
I found only two tiny Lapses of attention
Minnesota's other tribe, the Dakota Sioux's
a comma is needed after Sioux's

At the bottom, there is an invalid link.

*Vine2*
Lasting impression
You're a lucky lady to be central to all this history. What we did to the Native Americans was beyond shameful, so it's relieving to learn about something positive regarding those people.


Respectfully reviewed by,
Nixie

Butterfly Book


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
93
93
Review of Haze  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
Image for anni reviews


Hi BScholl. Congratulations on your 15 years of membership.

Let me break from my normal format and kick off with my favorite line because it's remarkable in what it conveys.
I felt powerful in its presence. Somehow, it nourished me, fed me, pumped energy into me.

Interesting, the light wasn't beckoning him to the other side. Rather, it was nourishing him. The plot quickly showed the reader what was wrong with the narrator, by revealing the comment about his head wound. I thought the story would play out as a mystery, but all the paragraphs in the beginning left little doubt.

I also marveled at the sentence about his mom brushing his hair. I wonder if that's what brought him back? Something familiar and pleasant. I liked the description when the mom was introduced.

What a creative way to use the required word (tornado). I would have struggled to fit that in. My only thought that came to mind was how to incorporate the storm into the story. Nicely done!

Oops
I arose from my bed, and walked down the stairs.
(no comma)

In the first paragraph, it pleased me to know he had no fear. In the second sentence, the word (just) can be eliminated.

Comas are scary as some never wake up. The happy ending was touching. You certainly evoked some senses in 298 words. I don't like it when people ask me this kind of question, but where was the dad? Silly me. He didn't fit into the w/c. I guess you could have said (parents), but the mom's actions were much more poignant. It almost seemed as if I were with her.

I enjoy rising to the challenge of FF. Seems you do as well.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.

Image #2332117 over display limit. -?-
*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
94
94
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Image for anni reviews


Hi BScholl. Congratulations on your 15 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
Perusing through all your FF entries, I chose this one. I liked the title and the brief description.

*Mushroombr* The comments
From the very first phrase the mood was established. (leotards?) Very humourous. At first I thought Tracy was a woman (because of the name). The scene instantly activates with Tracy's attempts and disastrous failures. I was shocked when he continued, hellbent to rekindle a spark lost in a marriage.

The attempts brought about some awful consequences, and this was both funny and full of action. I felt for the poor man's thorns stuck in his derriere. My mom always used that word.

*HeartG* Personal connection
One time, I climbed a ladder to the roof. I had my cell phone in case of trouble. No problem reaching the roof, but the first thing to go wrong was my cell sliding to the ground.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
Oh, as if the plot leading to the conclusion was not enough, the ending kicked in with two unexpected twists.

I enjoyed reading this clever piece. Great work here.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
95
95
Review of My Sweet Miranda  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Dave. Congratulations on your 19 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
The title and brief description read like a song. I never suspected the conclusion, because the first genre was romance/love, which usually ends as a boring happily ever after.

*Mushroombr* The comments
Here, we have two separate topics. Love and darkness-- the cartel responsible for the grisly conclusion. The drug cartel felt like a casual mention, a bit off beat.

I sincerely hope this isn't a personal experience. I'm also wondering if "Sweet Miranda" was written for a contest with a word count.

'They' say, life is only a roll of the dice. It's up to us how that roll will play out. Some of us don't get a chance. Our life is cut short in the most unexpected way.

*HeartG* Personal connection
I won't write about my daughter's car crash, she survived, but the seat belt broke her collar bone and scapula. She spent seven days in the hospital.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
Other than the tragic ending, what really caught my attention was the repetition of how the narrator met Miranda on a cloudy day and then she died on a cloudy day.

Nicely composed.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
96
96
Review of Ode to Joy  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Annie Congratulations on your 19 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
OOH. Look what I dredged up from 18 years ago!

What a tease, this title and brief description. I landed on the assumption, most likely, exactly as planned. Surely, this must be an ode for a special person.

*Mushroombr* The comments
I guess my mind was in the gutter, well, at least in the beginning it sounded a bit, um, sexy? Then I read the line about plaster. That didn't sum up to anything close as expected. Time to reset my thinking and read the last stanza.

*HeartG* Personal connection
I like Almond Joys with nuts. There was a jingle for the choice, "Sometimes I feel like a nut, sometimes I don't."

*Mushroombr* Suggestions
Larger font, please.

Generally, I'm opposed to exclamation points in writing, specifically in short stories. Here, in this bit of a poem, the exclamation points found a proper home.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
Candy bars lure me in. At times the siren call can be ignored. But my body insists on a bite or two of chocolate after dinner. I only eat the candy that has dark chocolate--less sugar, more chocolate. Less guilt.

Thanks for the laugh. What a super treat to read this early afternoon. Happy Anniversary.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
97
97
Review of Beliefs...  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Image for anni reviews


Hi 🌖 HuntersMoon Congratulations on your 16 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
The cover art cracked me up.

Ken, I've always been impressed by your keen sense of humor. In some ways, I envy you. My mind doesn't ride on the rails of positivity. Rather it rides on the opposite side, ever into the dark tunnel. I'm dreaming of changing this someday.

*Mushroombr* The comments
Normally, I'd avoid a political piece, but knowing how lighthearted and optimistic you are, I wasn't afraid to take a peek. And then once I allowed myself to glance and ensure the Trump name was mentioned, combined with the 'left-leaning' comment, off I went for a careful read.

*HeartG* Personal connection
Um...this is a public review, so I hope those with differing opinions don't read this one. As of now, he's a threat to the little people and, honestly, I'm a little scared. Then I remind myself, nothing happens until it happens. Also, I have no control over what happens, so no need for stress.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
The rhyming scheme fell into place with accurate remarks concerning the three presidents. Of course, I'm applauding the last stanza and laughing all the while. Nicely done.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
98
98
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | N/A (Review only item.)
Image for anni reviews


Hi stevengepp Congratulations on your 14 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
I wasn't expecting what "20241212 Stages Of Grief" Open in new Window. entailed. I thought it would be about humans (not story characters, who are in a way alive) grieving.

*Mushroombr* The comments
The article, for lack of a better word, deals with actual fiction stories. Before I read this, I never thought about it. Maybe because I've never killed a character before. It's a fantastic idea.

You mentioned the room as a shrine. We've all moved away from our childhood home, but that's where my sister died. She was only thirty years old. For 10 years, no one was allowed to say her name. I know my mom still struggles. How can a parent overcome the grief of losing a child?

You presented the ideas in an easy to read format, with enough information to acquaint the reader and included a link. You covered every aspect. Well done.

*HeartG* Personal connection
No way am I going into too much of my personal losses. I can say that expected, or unexpected, the loss has no less impact on my life. My people live in my heart forever. As mentioned in one paragraph, The tragedy stays with us.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
My son, who did 2 tours in Iraq, is exhausted by people saying "Thank you for your service." Much the same, "I'm sorry for your loss," has lost all meaning, but I am sorry for your loss.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
99
99
Review of What Makes a Cat  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Rhoswen - Relentless Victory Congratulations on your 8 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* The hook
I adore cats, so this prose was the obvious pick.

*Mushroombr* The comments
Watching a cat is relaxing and soothing. In the various lines you capture your experience and the observations.

I hope that mouse was just for play, a toy. I once had a cat (I've owned several over the years) who was an exceptional hunter. Once he brought a dead rat, still warm, and plopped it at my feet, gifting me.

As for my interpretation, a tail swishing back and forth means intensity, especially while stalking. *Right* Did you mean to type swishing rather than switching? The spelling is so familiar...

*HeartG* Personal connection
December 2024 4th was the one year anniversary of putting down my cat. I'm still struggling. She was fascinating in so many ways. My prose would have been at least twice as long.

*Mushroombr* Final observations
If I had to guess, I'd say this poem was a one-off, written from the heart, light and breezy. There is so much more to a cat than what was expressed here. Had I any doubt, the final, comic line confirmed my supposition. I bet you had fun writing this.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
100
100
for entry "Hello" Open in new Window.
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Image for anni reviews


Hi Chrys O'Shea - Writing again. Congratulations on your 12 years of membership.

*Mushroombr* What prompted me to read this?

I enjoy reviewing for anniversaries because it's a marvelous way to find members previously unknown.

*Mushroombr* The comments
The topic was a promise to yourself, encouraging you to write more. You fell short, but that's forgivable. We all have goals that don't always come to fruition. That's why I never write any promises to myself. I know that if the accomplishments are written, I'll never follow through. The task discourages, more than motivates.

It's possible I'm reading this sentence incorrectly, but the last part seemed contradictory. If you have a vast amount of ideas, why would you be struggling for something to write?

I always try to have too many things going on because they sound good, then I end up with an unfinished story hunting for something to write.

*HeartG* Personal connection

I have the same problem. My blog is mostly ignored. One reason I like to read blogs is because they're informal and telling. The author doesn't have to worry about getting everything right; it can be written as a flow of thoughts.

*Mushroombr* Final observations

You're working on writing books, which must consume all of your time. That's the spot where you will shine.

Respectfully reviewed by
~Nixie "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group" Open in new Window.


*SuitHeart* A Review from: "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.*SuitHeart*


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
1,532 Reviews • *Magnify*
Page of 62 • 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://www.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/nixie9/sort_by/r.review_creation_time DESC/page/4