First of all, welcome to WDC! I'm sure you'll love it here. I'm OOT™ , and I would be happy to help you with anything you need. Feel free to email me at any time!
My Thoughts: I decided to read this story because of its clever title, and I was also intrigued by the description. I'm glad I did! I really enjoyed this piece. I'm a big fan of this genre, and you did it justice with this story. The idea was somewhat original, and although the story was relatively short, it was complete and interesting. I know from experience how difficult it can be to write a coherent story using few words, but you made it seem effortless here. Good job!
When I noticed that you had started the story in present tense, I was uncertain whether or not it would work, but it did! And you did a terrific job of staying in present tense throughout the story, something many other authors have trouble with. I didn't understand why the blank footnote was at the end of the story, but, other than that, I enjoyed every word!
My Suggestions: In the first paragraph, the comma after "face" should be omitted. I would put a question mark with the exclamation point at the end of that paragraph. In the first sentence of the second paragraph, "mans" should be "man's" to show possession. Also, I would insert the word "and" after the comma in the first sentence; otherwise, you have a run-on sentence, because you have two complete sentences, separated by only a comma. You have several run-on sentences in the quote in that paragraph. I know that Warren was probably rambling on, but there should be some type of punctuation.
In the first sentence of the fifth paragraph, a comma should be inserted after "him". In the last sentence of that paragraph, a comma should be inserted after "smirks". In the next paragraph, I would change, "Warrens face-hardens and he sneers leaning into her," to "Warren's face hardens, and he sneers as he leans into her,"
I think you have too much going on in this sentence, "Warren is stone, his eyes are closed, her legs kick out at him and her hands grasp at his- she flails outward violently." I think you should separate this into at least two sentences. A few paragraphs later, since you're continuing a quote, the word "where" shouldn't be capitalized when you're talking about dogwood trees. In the first sentence of the next paragraph, a comma should be inserted after "time". In the last sentence of that paragraph, "scraps" should be "scrapes". A comma should be inserted after "position" in the first sentence of the next paragraph. There should be a comma between "Sobbing" and "Warren" in that paragraph, and "guys life" should be "guy's life". In the last paragraph, first sentence, a comma should be inserted after "spring". In the last sentence, a comma should be inserted after "come".
Overall: Thank you for sharing this short story. I really enjoyed the read, and I can already tell you're going to be an excellent addition to the WDC community. I look forward to visiting your port again soon.