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893 Public Reviews Given
894 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Not sure I have a style....I learn as much from you as you from me. I will point our typos, grammatical things if I see them. I love poetry and when it comes to stories, please nothing "dark"....not my thing.
I'm good at...
I will find typos, incomplete thought (unless I believe it is conducive to the poetry structure).
Favorite Genres
Romance, personal, periodicals with history, comical, stories about true life, children, animals
Least Favorite Genres
Dark, morbid, Sci-fi
I will not review...
Dark, morbid stories
Public Reviews
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51
51
Review of My word  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi there, as you requested here is my review:

I like that you took on this as a poem and respect your comments. It is well written and gives us a bit of insight about you, the person. I have one comment on: the last line of your stanza of "I don't really care".

I'd do so as I say
Truth be told,
I don't really care

Is that really true? You don't really care? I don't think you really mean that or why would you bother with such an important statement in your poem!

You do care about your truth and in this poem you are defending yourself, so I question that comment as mentioned above.

Outside of that.....I like it and it serves you say who you are.

Thanks,

Seabreeze
52
52
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Very lovely, your A Chill in a Breeze! I don't know the Haiku format very well but I know that I love how this poem flows! It is as I remember back to some mornings; especially in the early summer, at a camp site in the mountains! A crisp chill, coffee...we start to awake...YES!

Thank you so much for this journey,


Seabreeze
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Review of Little Boy  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I truly could feel the emotion that went into writing this piece. It is unfortunate what children go through; it should never be. It is not what our heavenly Father wanted. However, He does not waste any of us and will take it and allow us to help others. I truly believe it. Keep writing; you have stories that others needs to hear and you have a talent for telling them

God bless
Seabreeze
54
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Review of Guarded  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Thanks for looking at my Savior our Lord. I appreciate your comments and that you took time to read my poem.

I truly like your rendition; it speaks much of faith and understanding of our Lord. He truly blesses us and He keeps us in His guard especially if we our respectful of Him and follow his commandments. He gives us so much in return. You have identified our Lord here in your poem.

Thanks for your visit,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (4.5)
Interesting poem. I does get me thinking about time spent. I have never been a spur of the moment type person, so I cannot say that I have come up with a "thing" to do as you reference. I usually have to plan events with others. For myself, yes, I will say I need to do something different today.

As we get older, resting one day, and doing something fun the next has been my speed these days. I like your breakdown in the poem; how you have analyzed the situation.

I a world of electronics, I feel it stifles our creativity. Several years ago, my granddaughters (now 12, 10), would like to do crafts, draw, paint....but no, since their phones......not so much anymore. Creativity is out the window. So glad we Writing.com.

Best wishes,
Seabreeze
56
56
Review of Heart Song  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Heart Song - truly beautiful. I was just out walking through your portfolio and having a great time. The third stanza...beautifully written,

I have enjoyed my journey,

Seabreeze
57
57
Review of Winter Bloom  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Winter Bloom - oh such heart break! Glad to see it was written awhile back so hope your heart has taken a big healing!

I love the balance it has and how the words flow! Prompt is also interesting? Paper Hearts? Yes, they cannot and many are very pretty!

Great piece,

Seabreeze
58
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Review of coastline  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, nice title for your selection! It is cheerful poem; fun to read.
Cherry lips; bubble gum - I would say it tells of a very young couple; like you
stated - just kids!

I like the quickness, the beat that you accomplished with one and two syllable words.

Using the word memories always, I feel, gets up, as a reading to reminisce. A very nice
poem to bring us back and to give us that moment of thought!

Thanks,
Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi Tim,

Great post! I say that because, for me, it just confirmed to myself why I decided to be cremated. I don't want to be dug up, moved, or whatever...I prefer to have my ashes scattered, somewhere.

I have read to many stories of family fighting each year over where they were going to visit so and so's grave or not. My mom and dad told me of those families stories - mom and dad were cremated...scattered at sea.

Another problem, is the lack of attendance to graveyards over the years. Cities fight over what to do with cemeteries, whether to move the caskets to some other located because that piece of
land is now too valuable to let lie fallow. I say, put a golf course or a recreation center on it!

So.....I appreciate your post and it hits home to me.

I have been criticized for my beliefs because I am a Christian and many say that just isn't right. But, I say, my God is so big that I know he will not have a problem putting my soul back with a resurrected body when He comes back.

Best wishes to you,
Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Wow, what a story....the problem is....I want more. I want to read the book! In this day and age, anything is possible. I could see this happening to a few people...whether a scam or a government experiment...I could see it happening. Even if a select group wanted to kidnap a few, find out who could possibly pay, I could see that turning into a money maker for kidnappers.

So...when you going to post more? Is it a book?

Also, I may be one in a few who knows where Weed, CA is (I am a native California; grew up in Riverside).

Great story,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
I really like this and I am one who know about Cal Farley's and Boys Town. My dad use to donate to them. My dad was from Nebraska/Kansas area. I suspect the is a story...family or someone close to you that may have been part of the Cal Farley family?

In any case, well done with this poem....I love that it tells a story.

Seabreeze
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Review of Whitney Way  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (4.5)
Interesting post, Drifter. But, what is Whitney Way: housing complex, high tech business, fish house processing plant??

There is enough of a spark to get me to read your post and I can relate because I have relocated several times but nothing so abruptly. Maybe this would be one to continue on with?

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Oh how adorable; I had never seen this before. I love that it is history combined with the true love of a Teddy! Well played out in its words. The style is unique but I always love it when the style is explained. There are so many aspects to poetry and thanks for your notes on The Teddy Poem!

Seabreeze
64
64
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hi Abaru
Here we go on the review. I put it in two parts:

Oliver:

Well, let me say I believe this is the first time I have ever read a story quite like this one. And, with that I mean it is very interesting concept to have this dialogue. My first question would be that if you continue the story, would you continue to use the same two people dialogue throughout the story? That could really be interesting.
Now, looking at Oliver, I see that flows well and I could clearly understand what he is thinking and doing. I am only disturbed that he would want to kill his daughter's mother. And, what women in her right mind would want a man who would admit to that? Creepy! Then again, he was going to therapy so that tells you something right there.
Now, one thing that seem out of order to me was him wanting to call his wife to say hi just before she was going to meet her fate. And, the other thing that didn't make any sense to me is that his daughter was in the car with the mother and she could be killed in the accident as well. He did she avoid being killed?? Also, I am not sure who Jennifer was talking to when she said "shut up". Was that two her daughter??

Shirley:

Wow, now there is a woman I would not want to get on her wrong side....devious person. We know about Tyrone, or at least we think we do. Was he her first victim? Some people love manipulating people; they make it their life's work. I really don't think she truly cares for Oliver but more about what Oliver can deliver (money, feed her ego, etc.).
Also, forgive me but I am not familiar with this phrase.... It was T minus two minutes before ?? What does this mean. Maybe something was left out?
Did Oliver not know that his wife when to get their daughter and she was in the car??
I gather that poor Oliver has been in shock...from what the doctor and Shirley have spoke about. But, he daughter made it...and Jennifer did not. But, now I am a little lost as we get to the ending. Oliver appears to be dead as well?? If that is the case, you need something more to explain how??

It has been an interesting story...good concept to use but needs a little extra clarification.
Thanks,
Seabreeze
65
65
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Thanks for the trinkets....love your page and art work,

Seabreeze
66
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Review of Fantasy Love  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Fantasy Love - I think we all have had one similar if not almost a carbon copy. Sometimes it is hard to know how much of ourselves do we give - 60, 85, 95 percent? To remain ourselves, it sure cannot be 100%.

A lovely poem because it describes the truth of what can happen in a relationship. Sometimes I think we give and give and at some point expect the person we are giving to say, "stop" I have enough...but they don't and we give too much.

We can only hope we learn from our actions - the good ones and the bad ones. We must to remain whole.

Excellent poem,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Yes, been there and may have picked up the same breeze! Vegas has so changed. I love the fancy casinos but the crowds - no more! I remember when in the 60s how much less congested and fun it was to walk the area...and though the lights were not what they are today...it was still fun.

Good description of something gone wrong.

Seabreeze
68
68
Review of New Page  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Wow. Hope you are better now. I believe one good way to take care of hurts is writing about it. It lets us really see how it affects us as we read it back. You have done well in describe your feelings and your actions.

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Very intriguing! I like where he ended up praying, crying out to his mother. The part about running through backyards (no sure if very practical in a day when many people own guns) - not to sure about that one.

When he is at the grave site, he is kneeling so he is near, at ground level. How can he fall...he is falling but where? I think you need more of a description as to what just happened; maybe that is just me.

The whole concept of the story I like and pulls me in.

Oh, back to running through backyards....reminds me. Did you ever see the movie The Swimmer with Burt Lancaster (1968)?? I was probably the worst movie that he ever made. If you have seen it, you know what I am talking about.

Anyways, good plot,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Here I am again. Love this poem given by a believer. It is beautiful and glad I came over to see your site and read this.

Seabreeze
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Review of A Frog  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
OMG, I love this frog. A song comes to mind: Al Jolson's Mammy!

I have been browsing around and having fun - thanks!

Seabreeze
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Review of My Yard, My Rules  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Very interesting; you have set the stage well. I can see the players and remember many times watching both cats and squirrels magically frolic about unaware of the entertainment they are providing.

I enjoyed my stay,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (4.5)
Very interesting - to get a review into a whole book, I imagine?

With the "settings", one could also imagine their own story as they read along.

Only could I understand what was going on, when I went to review your Portfolio!

Best to you,

Seabreeze
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Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (4.5)
Very nice story! It has a mystic about it...which kept me interested. Good descriptions along the way gave me a vivid look into the eyes of the writer.

Your first post.; congratulations!...I am glad to be here to read it!

Best wishes,

Seabreeze
75
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Review of Frogs and toads.  
Review by Seabreeze
Rated: E | (5.0)
Very cute they way you told this story. It made me think; what is the different between a toad and a frog. We had a couple of toads, I believe, in an old aquarium for a while. Was kind of fun to watch them. Toads are bigger, right? Frogs, smaller?

In any case.....fun story.

Thanks,
Seabreeze
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