Here we go on the review. I put it in two parts:
Well, let me say I believe this is the first time I have ever read a story quite like this one. And, with that I mean it is very interesting concept to have this dialogue. My first question would be that if you continue the story, would you continue to use the same two people dialogue throughout the story? That could really be interesting.
Now, looking at Oliver, I see that flows well and I could clearly understand what he is thinking and doing. I am only disturbed that he would want to kill his daughter's mother. And, what women in her right mind would want a man who would admit to that? Creepy! Then again, he was going to therapy so that tells you something right there.
Now, one thing that seem out of order to me was him wanting to call his wife to say hi just before she was going to meet her fate. And, the other thing that didn't make any sense to me is that his daughter was in the car with the mother and she could be killed in the accident as well. He did she avoid being killed?? Also, I am not sure who Jennifer was talking to when she said "shut up". Was that two her daughter??
Wow, now there is a woman I would not want to get on her wrong side....devious person. We know about Tyrone, or at least we think we do. Was he her first victim? Some people love manipulating people; they make it their life's work. I really don't think she truly cares for Oliver but more about what Oliver can deliver (money, feed her ego, etc.).
Also, forgive me but I am not familiar with this phrase.... It was T minus two minutes before ?? What does this mean. Maybe something was left out?
Did Oliver not know that his wife when to get their daughter and she was in the car??
I gather that poor Oliver has been in shock...from what the doctor and Shirley have spoke about. But, he daughter made it...and Jennifer did not. But, now I am a little lost as we get to the ending. Oliver appears to be dead as well?? If that is the case, you need something more to explain how??
It has been an interesting story...good concept to use but needs a little extra clarification.