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551 Public Reviews Given
551 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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1
1
Review of Group Therapy  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.


Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
As I read I felt the raw emotional appeal of your plea 'don't make me do this...' I've been there.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I see the chairs in a circle, the group of 'misfits' that are brought together by chance. Do I really want to listen? DO I really HAVE to speak??

Grammar:
No errors were noted.


Suggestions:
This is a solid poem, if you could make it rhyme there would be a huge impact on the feelings you are talking about. Also, a larger font for us old-timers would be great!

Thank you for sharing your work. Write On!


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2
2
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your Promise on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.


Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I feel your frustration in creativity not leaping to the fore on demand. I've had my moments as well. Especially recently.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
As I was reading, I admired your second voice... your "giving yourself a good talking to." It is something we should do more.. that is like taking inventory of yourself, your emotions, and your thoughts.

Grammar:
I just wanted to let you know that there were no errors noted.

Suggestions:
I got a book called "642 Things to write about". Maybe something like that can assist you in your endeavors.

Thank you for sharing your work. Write On!


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3
3
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I really enjoyed reading this joint work. It makes me think of striving for that elusive win, the effort it takes to finish at all, at times makes the wins so much more valued.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I liked the image of racking up points to compete with yourself when in the end it only matters that your tried and did your best.

Grammar

No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I liked the format and the use of color to define the writer, I would request larger font size so I can more easily read your words.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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4
4
Review of Closet Doors  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
Wow.. closets. That's an unusual topic... an image that evokes many feelings and thoughts. I was shut in closets a few times by baby sitters who wanted to get rid of me for a few hours. Horrifying events that haunt me still. My parents never did that, thank God, and I have never done that to my kids, EVER!

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I like how you changed your expectations of closets into a positive, yet troubling change of shape with the change of life. My closets have been used by many shapes, sizes and colors, so I get that.

My real fear is under the bed images of monsters about to grab my legs and feet.

Grammar

No errors noted.


Suggestions:

A larger font would make it easier to read for these nearly blind eyes!

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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5
5
Review of Estee Lauder  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This was poignant and loving. A very nice read. Scent is the largest evoker of memory in the brain. I use "Skin Musk" by Bonne Belle... a lovely floral, subtle sandalwood musk smell. Try it sometime. It must be wonderful to think of your mom when you smell that scent.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I like the image that you would feel better when you were down by using a spritz of her perfume. I also loved the post-game celebration scent!


Grammar

No errors noted.


Suggestions:

The only suggestion I have is use a larger font, I like the bold, and I like the format, but I squint to see print because of cataracts.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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6
6
Review of A New Chapter  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This I really enjoyed. It is true that we are told as knee high toddlers that to love and appreciate yourself is a sign of conceit and narcissism. That is so untrue. When you think the world revolves around you and your pleasures THAT is narcissism. I also spend the majority of my life seeking approval and validation for myself through others' opinions. I rarely got it and felt lower than a dung beetle most of the time.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I feel you are 'growing up' now that you realize others' opinions might be nice, but is not the end all be all of approval. I respect myself now, and it sounds like you do, too, and I commend you. That is a hard step to take. This IS a new chapter in my life and now yours, congratulations!

Grammar

No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I like your format and the color, but I had a difficult time reading the words as I am nearly blind with cataracts. A larger font would be nice.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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7
7
Review of Flaxen  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I enjoy using words and phrases not commonly heard or seen now-a-days. Flaxen is one of my favorite words. It has a neat feel to it in the mouth when speaking it. (I know, that's really odd)

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I enjoyed how you used it in the second part of your work. Simple yet makes me think of a pouty lipped, cream-skinned beauty with golden fair hair.

Grammar

No errors noted.


Suggestions:


Using larger font will make it easier for people (like me) who can't see well, read your work.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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8
8
Review of The Sleeping Aid  
Review by Sherasi
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was very amusing, too. Thanks for sharing!


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9
9
Review of Rat Race  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This was a fun, exciting work to read. I know the original nursery rhyme well, but this just put that out of the, well, race.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
What's funny is my husband is obsessed with clocks.. he has about 13 of them including a small grandfather clock he was given that he fixed for a $40 part. We don't have mice (Thank God!!) or cats (sadly) but I can just see the race that the cat knows about and the mouse is unaware of!

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

The only suggestion I have is for poor visioned people like me, a larger font!

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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10
10
Review of Lost in the Mail  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This is a very emotional poem, very sad. I feel compassion for that package because I feel I myself have undergone that experience. I think many people have and do not know how to express it.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
This really struck me because relationships are often a lot like this. You see the outside, the image you expect to see and rarely look beneath the packaging to see the real person inside.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I suggest you use a larger font to read, it would make it easier to really grasp your intent.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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11
11
Review of Without You  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.


Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I feel the strength in this poem... the courage to make a life for yourself without getting brought down by adversity.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
It is short sweet and to the point, and I like that about it.


Grammar:
no errors noted.


Suggestions:
I suggest a larger font for easier reading.

Thank you for sharing your work. Write On!


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12
12
Review of My Time  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I enjoyed how you expressed a state of growth and maturation. I don't have a religious outlook on life, but I do have a spiritual outlook that recognizes that there is something greater and larger than me. I like how you spoke of placing your worries and cares into your God's hands. I, too, give up my negative emotions and worries to my higher power.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I like how you express that it is your time, and that you are continuing to grow and evolve.

Grammar

A better sentence structure with punctuation would improve the read.


Suggestions:

Enlarge the font for those with poor vision (me).

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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13
13
Review of Jane Doe  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This was an unexpected and creative topic for a poem. It struck me strongly. I get the impression of a restless spirit unable to find closure as her murderer is still at large. Your rhyming is well-done, not 'forced'. I enjoyed this read very much.

It kinds of reminds me of "Murder by Numbers" sung by the Police.

I like these two lines:
"I was beaten, stabbed and kicked in the head;
Wrapped in a blanket and left for dead.
"

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
The 'voice' was a bit uncanny, plaintive. I imagine a dreary, dark, dank and forested 'dumping site'. A little of the shivers there.

Grammar
I saw no errors.


Suggestions:

The only suggestion I have is to use a larger font since people with visual issues can read your work.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!


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14
14
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I enjoyed this work that was void of anything substantial or meaningful. Until the end, when the reader realizes that we are ALL half-baked, awaiting a meaning and purpose for living.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
The imagery was phenomenal: pendulums going no where, songs left undiscovered or performed, etc. I was quite intrigued by how you examine the minutiae of existence making it clear that humans can only become after the journey is complete.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

No need for suggestions

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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15
15
Review of Auld Lang Syne  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I enjoyed how you used the phrase "Auld Lang Syne" to create a work discussing this very topic. I've never tried writing an acrostic poem. I've reviewed several today and I'm fascinated.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
The pensive mood discussing the past events and how they affect the present is very distinctive. Then, you make full circle and say that today is worth taking a bright new look at.
I liked how you referenced various aspects of the poem explaining to the unlettered reader (me) what it all meant.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I have no suggestions, very well written.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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16
16
Review of I Miss You Papa  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This was meaningful to me because I lost my father on my 21st birthday and it affected my life for many years.. and still does, even being 56 years old now.

I like this line "PAPA , life is never the same without
you". This is so true, they say the pain goes away, for me it just became a 'throb' rather than a sharp stab.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I feel the feelings evoked by these simple words, the short phraseology and abrupt style make this more impactful than a long drawn out wail or lament would have.


Grammar
Given the way you wrote and displayed the words, I see no real reason to correct grammer.


Suggestions:

I can't see anything to change.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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17
17
Review of August  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I'm not familiar with this type of poetry meter, but it reads very well. I can feel the heat on the back of my neck from the hot summer days.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I love Fall, and this poem puts me into the mind of moving toward harvest and plenty in tones of gold and rich browns. This year has gone too fast.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I see no need for suggestions, it stands by itself.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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18
18
Review of The Bench  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your flash fiction on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This was a pleasure to read. It was a light romantic meeting and follow through in a relationship that lasts decades.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I am a very visual person as an artist. I got goosebumps when I read that.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

I see no need to change a thing.

Thank you for sharing your story.. Write On!

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19
19
Review of Hello There  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This is a poem that I can relate to.... intimately(I'm experiencing it right now)!!!

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I enjoyed the imagery 'my body is aching, and if you said you like that time of the day you'd be faking.' It really puts me in the mind of exhaustion with insomnia.

Grammar
no errors noted


Suggestions:

"the shrew" fits the rhyme but makes no sense.
Perhaps: (in a totally different direction) 'but frankly, you've not got a Clue'.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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20
20
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I found your work on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
This piece explains a lot of what I see in you. You are an intelligent, creative man who has found a way of satisfying your inner voice with words that are both written and spoken.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
You took an 'obligation' to your mother and made it your own. I am an RN, and I also feel Nurses work harder with wages not commensurate to the effort of the work. I feel proud that a fellow clinician has embarked on a path of law to use that knowledge to benefit those who can fall helplessly beneath the wheels of the medical juggernaut.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

No suggestions needed as this is a discussion of who you are and how you came to be where you are.

Thank you for sharing your experience. I enjoy what you write, please continue to write On!

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21
21
Review of The phoenix  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.0)
I found your work on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact: This work was whimsical to me, a sort of exploration of where the phoenix came from and what it means.


Artistic Voice and Imagery:
You use descriptors (words that provoke images) a lot and this is appealing to me. "Womb of the first rose" is provocative and intriguing as an image. You have a lot of potential as a writer, (this is not a short story) continue to write and get feedback from on here and from friends you know who can be impartial.

Grammar
No problems noted


Suggestions:

Some of your lines seem to repetitive for no good reason.. example: "a bird was born; its flight was like a ray of light, its colors magnificent
its flight was like a ray of light, its colors magnificent, its song rapturous." This is a bit confusing. You do this frequently, and I do not see a literary reason for it.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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22
22
Review of The Storm  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
Winter storms once again, I like your tone of inevitability. It makes me glad winter is a ways off from now, but it is approaching as we speak.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
It makes me feel shivery and yet looking forward to hiding out in old PJ's with hot cocoa and a book!

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

"The flurries and squalls soon start
more and more heating oil is sold.
People push loaded grocery carts
stocking for a storm as it unfolds."

These words are meant to rhyme, I know, but it feels a but awkward.
Perhaps you could say: 'stocking for storms, as it WILL unfold'.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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23
23
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your work on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
Hi, I read your discussion and it was interesting. You have some creative thoughts about love and relationships. I am not sure how old you are, but you seem pretty young to me, which isn't a bad thing at all. It is good to get out there and express yourself.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I've never read manga and had no idea it could be romantic. If you are feeling things from reading it, however, that is good. Learning about yourself and the world around you is very worthwhile.

Grammar
No errors noted or counted.


Suggestions:

I think you have potential to expressing yourself more formally (In the form of poetry, essays or short stories) and should definitely do so.

Thank you for sharing your work. Keep writing more!

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24
24
Review of Agoraphobia  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I like the subject of this poem, I enjoy how it is discussed and described to those who may not have heard of it or understood it. This is an insidious mental disorder and many people suffer from it.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
I like your imagery.. the foot probing out the door trying to work the courage up to actually egress.

Grammar No errors noted.


Suggestions:

"There's life beyond here, but can't ignore doubt." This describes well clinically what is going on, but artistically it could use a bit of tightening. Perhaps say, 'But you still feel your doubt'. Not all your stanzas are 5 syllables, so this could work.

I really liked this work. But it isn't quite work 5 stars, so 4 1/2 stars for you. Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On.... you definitely have talent!

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25
25
Review of Patchwork Quilt  
Review by Sherasi
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
I found your poem on Read & Review. I enjoyed reading it and hope you find this feedback useful.

Overall Impression/Emotional Impact:
I very much like this poem. I enjoyed your thoughts about how there is an inevitable quality of death followed by hope and promise of life.

Artistic Voice and Imagery:
Your imagery is lovely, "patchwork quilt, upon the cooling earth..." This very close to my writing style (which is why I like it, I guess! ). I enjoy brevity of words for the maximum impact.

Grammar
No errors noted.


Suggestions:

You wrote beautifully, no changes necessary in my humble opinion.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Write On!

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