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1
1
for entry "Marie Of Romania
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)


*Tiara* Hi Megan Rose! "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group is touring our Around the World Ports and I found this lovely essay on Princess Marie! You did a really good job of highlighting who she was and her bio. I had not idea she was actually more powerful that the king, yet I imagine it does happen at times that the woman have stronger skills. I admire how she adapted to the foreign land. *Smile*

*Tiara* It was easy to read the essay and it flowed in a coherent manner. I sensed a tone of admiration for this person as well. The choice of topic and vocabulary represented the country effectively! *Star* Thanks for sharing your vision and adding to our collection of World items.

eyestar
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group
2
2
Review of Dawn Breaking  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Balloony*Hiya Quest-YELLOW-Thanks Schnujo ! *Delight* I am happy to review to celebrate you. This is part of your package in the "SuperPower Animals Auction for Charity! Thanks for your generosity.

*Fairy* Wow! This is a wonderfully vivid picture and appealed to my muse. With a potent tone and clear descriptive images it was easy to enter your vision.


The free style suit the theme and emotional content and it was a pleasant read in its flow and imagery. The image of the palms swishing and dark "molested" by the air is brilliant and original. I could imagine the sapling and the "jeweled net" was appealing. *Thumbsup* I was charmed by the weave and the comparison.

I think the word "unbelievable" is not as poetic as some of your other descriptives....not as real. *Wink*

Thanks for sharing your gift and vision. I enjoyed your world. *Starstruck*


Keep the ink flowing as you follow your muse and write on!*Star*
eyestar


GROUP
WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  (E)
Join the fun! We inspire reviewers through kindness and learning! Four time Quill winner!
#1300305 by Maryann
3
3
for entry "Black Moonlight
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Witch* Hiya Tinker. I am happy to review your poem for "I Write 2018"! *Delight*

*Moon* I enjoyed the theme and your images are vivid enough for me to easily enter the vision of the night and witching hour!

*bat* It was a pleasure to read aloud with its wonderful soundscape. Assonance, consonance and alliteration tools are well chosen. I really liked "gossamer ghosts" and the motion of "merges" is effective. I can also imagine the wispy clouds crossing the moon. LOL

*Ghost* The form of tanka is well composed and the topic is a unique one for the form. It was fun to read with its imaginative picture.

*Jackolantern* Thanks for sharing your clear vision and craft.

eyestar
4
4
for entry "Beyond
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Fairy2* Hi Tinker! I am happy to review your poem in the I Write in 2018 challenge! Isn't it fun to do these 24 syllable poems? You shine! *Star*

*Burstr* The title was intriguing and I like the idea of the enigma of the theme labyrinth..it could go beyond to the unknown! Brilliant!

*Burstg* My imagination was inspired by the word "golden labyrinth"! Good hook! The contrast of imagination and madness is interesting and valid too. The verb "threatens" adds potency to your image. I like how evocative your concept is as you leave room for the reader to add their own vision. *Thumbsup* Deep stuff.

*Delight*I had a thought of the mind being a labyrinth as well with its many facets.
Thanks for sharing your vision and craft. I enjoyed entering your labyrinth. *Star*

eyestar
5
5
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Delight*Hi Carly! I am happy to review your poem for the I Write in 2018 Challenge!*Smile*

*Fairy* Wow! I enjoyed reading this weave aloud as the soundscape was interesting and the ideas appealing. I would like a place where these essences abound. The free style suits the theme and content and I like how you do use a bit of rhyme and alliteration in a free way.

I thought maybe you could drop one and in the second last line as you use one in each of three lines in a row and it makes it a bit run on!.*Wink* The image words "frolics" and "flirts" are mravelous and the heavy words of "unencumbered" etc really give a sense of that feeling! Nice contrast with lighter feeling words! *Thumbsup*

I notice a couple of periods. I wonder about using punctuation consistently or even not at all. *Wink*

I like the idealism of this place of dreams. Lovely response to the prompt! *Star*

Thanks for sharing your vision! Keep writing on! *Quill*

eyestar
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Review of WRITING DOT COM  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
*Cake* Ahoy! Thanks for entering the "Eighteen Candles Poetry Contest! to celebrate WDC's 18th Birthday! *Balloonp*

I enjoyed your acrostic with its clear format and treasure of WDC qualities noted in each key letter of the relevant key words. Well done! *Salute*

The tone is positive in its tribute with some appealing vocabulary and images like "opulant oasis" and "treasured traditions". You really capture a broad view of what WDC entails. It was fun to read aloud with its effective alliteration! *Thumbsup*

Thanks for sharing your vibrant vision and craft! I loved it.*Balloong*

eyestar
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


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Review of Writing Dot Com  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Cake* Ahoy! Thanks for entering the "Eighteen Candles Poetry Contest! to celebrate WDC's 18th Birthday! *Balloonp*

I enjoyed your acrostic with its invitational tone. The idea of addressing people to come on in and discover WDC fare is so unique and you make it sound fun to join! *Star* The short lines and imperative invites of what to do is well conceived!

The key words are relevant and the energy vibe is celebratory and positive in its tribute to our home site. I smiled at "our corner of the net"! Wonderful read.

Thanks for sharing your vibrant vision and craft! *Balloong*

eyestar
"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group


8
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Review of Birthday Wish  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp*Ahoy! Thanks for celebrating "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group's 10th Anniversary with your participation in "Musings and Memories! *Delight*

What a thoughtful tribute to WDC and their creators! I like how you included SM and SMS and the idea of WDC as an author's home. You create a picture of authors, their purpose, hopes and queries and how this site has been so influencial in allaying fears and supporting writers. *Thumbsup*

The acrostic key words are relevant and the concept of wish fits with the the theme of author's hopes for a venue to share! *Cool* The only glitch for me was the over use of "selves" in varying forms, though could add to rhyme. *Wink*

Thanks for sharing your unique vision! *Balloonp*

*Star*Light on the path as you write on!

eyestar

"WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group
9
9
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi Jeff! I am Happy to review this for I Write in 2018 Challenge!*Delight*

I really enjoyed reading this flash story. I thought the wisdom of the father was so sweet and you did a great job with the unexpected twist there. *Thumbsup* It was not the reponse one would expect. I laughed at the comment about the ladder! Talk about aiding the rebellion! Cool!

The piece was well written and the situation was a relevant one for teen rebellion. The title really fit the essence of the message too. I did wonder about beginning the piece with the first bit to dialogue to attract curiousity and start with drama rather than describing why the dad would be surprised. I can see that it would be necessary...but maybe placed after a more engaging opening. *Wink*

The dialogue was engaging and revealed story and the relationshipm showing that it was a close one. I think your use of the prompt words was creative too...the idea of a shell here makes sense. *Thumbsup*

It would be so cool if more parents could have this kind of relationship with teens. I like the idea that the responsible girl...could have balance and the dad was open to this. *Heart*

Thanks for sharing your vision!

eyestar
10
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Review of The Sailboat  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Welcome to WDC Ceredir! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


Wow! I enjoyed reading your free style poem where you lure me onto the sea on the sailboat. I was drawn in by your vivid image of the storm in the first verse! Well done.

*Fairy*You captured the experience of the boat being caught in the storm with clear imagery. I could imagine the boat bobbing, oars, hull from your detailed description. It also evoked the idea of the determined boatsmen struggling to make it home. *Smile* Words like "bobs:, "plunge" and "creaking" and "all tumult to defy" all help create the pictures. Super! The last verse leaves us to wonder the outcome.

*Fairy*The 4 line verses were pleasant to read aloud for its consistent rhyme and flow. It had a sing song effect as if bobbing on the waves. The choice of vocabulary suits the theme and created an appealing soundscape for reading aloud. *Thumbsup* For example the 'K& c" sounds in verse three. etc.

*Starstruck* Whew! I hope they make it. Thanks for sharing this vivid vision and craft. I really entered into the storyline and enjoyed the read.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*

11
11
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Abby Gayle! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Balloonp* What a cool variety of cnotes! They cover friendship, thanks, get well, welcome and anniversary! Something for every one! I like you cover picture for the shop..an original glyph interpretation of cnotes... they are like a song! LOL

*balloop* Your introduction is so inviting as it engages us with questions, proposing why we might require a note. Wow! Good to know they are home made. I was wondering if you are the creator. I like that it has the feel of a catchy add with the ideas in the forth line. *Thumbsup* In a nut shell sales!

*Balloonp* The cnotes are vivid with easy to read messages on the pictures. I love the dog one..sharing sticks is hilarious and I know some dogs won't. LOL The WDC anniversary one made me laugh!! Such an expressive rabbit! *Laugh* The Welcome note is sweet and the message about soaring so fits our WDC experience...getting our talents out there! I laughed at HAY and I knwo several folks who would love wolves...just find some one who needs to feel better. *Think*

*Balloong* I had fun reading these notes and they are reasonably priced. I want to send that dog one somewhere.*Delight* I will be adding this to my favourites so I can find it easier. *Heart* Thanks for sharing this cool contribution to WDC! You rock! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
12
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Review of In Your Eyes  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Lady Leo and Welcome to WDC! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Balloonp* What a sweet idea to write to your sister. I am the eldest of 6 so I can relate to this heartfelt poem.

You express with a caring voice and such pride in your sister's being herself. The tone is upbeat as you speak directly to her and share your pride, wisdom, and hope for her in her life. I really relate to your sentiments in verse 4 and heartwarming when you can see yourself in her. *Heart* I think youngest sisters do hold special place in older sister's hearts. LOL The last verse is so reassuring, as we all like to know someone will have our backs.

*Star*The poem is well composed with a smooth rhythm and consistent rhyme so it was pleasant to read out loud. The language is simple and direct and the contrasts of youth and old soul, innocence and cruel, are effective in your message as you express what you observe in her and from your experience of life.

I think your sister would love to receive this! Thanks for sharing so authentically your vision. *Heart*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
13
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Review of Raccoon Haiku  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Happy Party time Dominique! I am popping in with a short review! *Delight*


*Balloonp* Wow! I love the sound effect of the title "Raccoon Haiku". *Laugh* How clever to use the scientific name and how you weave interesting facts about raccoons.

*Balloonp*I see you have used the 5-7-5 syllable pattern in the 3 line verse and have two images to compare: the masks and nursery. I am not sure this would be technically named a traditional haiku as it is missing a cut line ... but it is so inventive and original. I really enjoyed pondering on it with its clear images of black masks etc. The first line is poetic image for sure! *Thumbsup*

*Quill* I wondered why you used the word "group" with nursery as the idea of a group is inherent in the word and meaning of "nursery". *Wink* I am not sure what else you would put here...it just seemed to mean the same thing. A minor consideration. And drop the capital letter on "The" as haiku only uses it with Proper nouns.

I loved reading the poem aloud as you have done a wonderful job with the soundscape using repeated letter sounds especially "K" and "N". Well conceived! *Thumbsup* The last line provides a synonym or connection to the masked ones in line one.

*Starstruck*Thanks for sharing your rendering of haiku, this evocative vision so appealed to me! Well done.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar




*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*

14
14
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Yay Sharmelle! Thanks for playing in "Eighteen Candles Poetry Contest!! I am popping in with a short review! *Delight*


Yippeee! This is a a unique acrostic giving praise for WDC. You even got it to rhyme! That is no small feat! *Salute* The key letters are bright and large on the page so the message of birthday really pops.

*Balloonp* Good job with the format and even getting it to rhyme. I like the way you wove personal experience and hope of growing at WDC. IT is a fine way to tribute. I laughed at the line about being better writer..without a crayon! *Laugh* Brilliant!

I think the word "threw" in lines 11 and 13 should be "through" to have meaning with the next lines. *Wink*

*Balloonp* The message was interesting and highlighted some aspects of WDC that you find awesome, the activities, friendship and writing. I liked line with the I -"I bet it was hard...".
and how you dealt with all the E's and how you show your own participation as a newbie...as a tribute that the site is magnetic and fun! *Thumbsup*

I was confused by your last line as I would have thought..."cannot" would have been "can" if you are asking whether , with so much going on here, do you think we could leave it behind. The way it reads , it sounds like you are asking: do you think we cannot leave you behind? *Wink* Must be a typo. Also it is a question, so a question mark would be good. *Smile*

*Star*Thanks for sharing you vision and jumping into the party mood and contest with flair.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group




*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*

15
15
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Yay! Thanks for playing in "Eighteen Candles Poetry Contest!! I am popping in with a short review! *Delight*


*Balloonp*Wow! This is a wonderful acrostic with a celebratory vibe! I loved the idea of "Cosmic..Journey!" Well said.

Your acrostic is well constructed and I like your key word choices, like "literists", "cosmic", and "engaging". References to key elements of WDC like Rising Stars, contests, writing, art and talents are well woven into the poem so it gives tribute to our site. *Thumbsup*

The decorations on the page give it a party flair too. The image of a sunburst is really cool as I see WDC has radiated on the web for this many years as a milestone! Good choice.*Smile*

I see the last part of your acrostic is the number 18 but the phrase you use works with out having to use the numbers as a key with a note beside it. That would be a challenge. *Think*

Thanks so much for sharing your joy of WDC in this forum and with our community. And it is your first time at our party, so imagine what you will see in the coming years as you add your flair to the site! It is authors like you who make all the difference! *Starstruck*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group




*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
16
16
Review of Shadowfall  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Balloonp* Happy Party time Papadoc! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Balloonr* Guess who popped up on the Random Reads? How lucky can I get...and it is a haiku, a form I so enjoy and continue to study! *Heart* The title, though Haiku tend not to have titles, is evocative and gives a clue to the mystery of your haiku. I know we add titles so we can keep track but I have read that old haiku just were numbered as titles give away the meaning at times. The idea is to have the reader just ponder the poem and find their own conclusions. *Wink* yet it is easier to find with titles around here.

*Balloonr* I enjoyed the flow and image of yours and smiled at the end. The last line gave an alternate consideration to the tripping! It is comical too!

*Balloonr* I see you used the 5-7-5 method of syllables, 3 lines and the topic concerns a natural occurance. *Thumbsup* I think in the best haiku, sentences are not used but rather phrases. Also haiku are observations in the present tense moment, comparing two things. I notice you begin in present and go into past. *Wink* I took a class and it blew my mind at how I was not really doing haiku..but the way we learned in school...which is kind of watered down. LOL

*Balloonr* Still, the overall effect of the poem is expressive and the imagery is vivid. I enjoyed entering into the reflection as I can imagine the shadow spreading out depeending on the light. It would be funny if we tripped on it. LOL

*Balloong* Thanks for sharing this delightful poem. I had fun! *Star*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
17
17
Review of Pelican Cove  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: ASR | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Than Pence! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*I had enjoyed your Lobster poem so I am jumping into Pelican Cove! *Laugh*

*Balloon*Another delightful read that kept my attention right to the end. I like the western theme and it is comical to think of the birds dressed up in cowboy hats. LOL The idea of them helping found the site is original...or is there really a myth? *Shock* You create quite a vivid picture of the event that apparently is carried on in a later time. Your last line was awesome and again I had to laugh. *Thumbsup*

*Balloonp* The poem seems to be written in rhyming couplets though two verses have four lines put together. Is there a reason for this? It flowed off the tongue smoothly as I read it aloud and some of your rhymes were cool, like "sticks" with "transfixed", "birds and turds", founders and flounders" (really funny idea! so apt.) The images were so clear. I could imagine the dive bombing and the waddling through town dressed up. "feathered horses" too funny! Brilliant conception. *Star*

Not all the lines had even rhythm count and it did not detract from the read. I was entertained by the story line. *Salute*

*Balloonr*Thanks for sharing your talent and this comical tale. I had fun!

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
18
18
Review of Cathedral  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time SWPOET! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*Oh how delightful a concept about trees being like a cathedral! I love it as I am a tree hugger! *Heart* Your poem really has a deep, meaningful message and the contrast with how man uses, destroys and yet have awe for them. I think it is because nature totally accepts us and receives us without judgement. Who else really does that? But the creator of all. *Heart*
This is brilliantly conceived.

*Balloon* The free style serves the theme and reflective tone of the piece. The repetition of the second line at the end is effective for emphasis and completing the circle. The consonance of the "c" sound in the poem is effective as well. The alliterative "w" and hard "d" sounds add to the appealing soundscape as well. "beneath, feels, and trees" does as well. Without rhyme these devices bring so much to the overall effect and flow of the work. *Thumbsup*

The only word that sticks out is that long adverb in the middle, yet I do not know what you could use to get across that words do not do the unexplainable justice. LOL

*Starstruck**Tree* Thanks for sharing your potent vision and craft. It is a real tribute to trees and inspires us to ponder!

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
19
19
Review of Africa! Africa!  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (5.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Pony Tale! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight* Wow! I enjoyed reading your vivid vision of Africa in this quatrain like poem. I like the refrain that reminds me of a lyric and it gives the impression of the poet's appreciation of Africa.
*Balloon* Each verse portrays a detailed description of an aspect of this country and it was easy to feel and see the landscape so lovingling expressed.

*Balloonp*The weave was an absolute pleasure to read aloud that I couldn't help read it a number of times. Beautifully rendered with effective rhyme and flow. The keen use of assonance and consonance created the soundscape that enhances the flow and sense appeal.*Salute* eg. the "p" in the last verse, inner rhyme and 'g' in third verse, h in second verse and lots of 's". Awesome composition.

*Star*It feels like you know the landscape intimately and are able to take us with you. The personification in the last verse and other places is perfect! Images like the "sky's liasons" and
"night pounces" are evocative. *Star*

*Starstruck* Thank you so much for sharing this sacred vision and your excellent crafting. It is a wonderful tribute to Africa.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
20
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Review of Fall  
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Victoria! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*I chose this as Fall is just on the horizon! Your title directly addresses the theme and the tone of the piece reveals your appreciation of fall's magic.

*BalloonP* I so appreciate the personification of the season and the notion of "collapse" and then "curtsy". What evocative imagery you create throughout! Your use of detail in your descriptions play to the senses too. I like the socks and soup and the zephyrs. *Thumbsup*

*Balloongo* The poem flows in a pleasant rhythm when I read it aloud and the rhyme adds flair. I notice you have a distinct for the start and end with a little line missing a rhyme. It did not throw me out, just made me ponder. eg. lines 5-6-7, has 5 and 7 rhyming but line 6 has none. Makes fall look like it is doing its own thing. Cool! Awesome rhyme words like "debut" and "cue" fits with the idea of curtsy and made me think of debutants! *Laugh* Your last line bears that out as well. Fabulous!

*Wink* I think you need to say "are on cue" as "exhales" is plural.

*Treefall* This was a vibrant vision that is a tribute to fall and it was easy to enter into its jubilance. Thank you for sharing your gift.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar



*Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B* *BalloonR*A Knock it Out Reviewing Activity for a Cause- in celebration of WDC 18th Anniversary *BalloonR* *Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B**Ornament1B*
21
21
In affiliation with SIMPLY POSITIVE GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time pretty35! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*Wow! This is a sad and moving story that expresses the tragedy of a abuse child. Your vividly capture the situation and what might go on in a child's mind during this experience with her mother. I like how you include the notion of mental escape, as it is a valid one. How else could one endure?

The voice of the child, told from her point of view is potent, and I know that the adult poet has put words that the child at the time would not have known perhaps. Even "Mentally escape" may not be a child expression. To give her the voice is powerful. The contrast of the beauty in her dream and the real life is so vividly described.

*Salute* You capture her hopelessness in the metaphor of swimming with no where to go and not lighthouse. Brilliant metaphor for the situation. *Thumbsup* Her puzzled queries echo through the piece even from the first "what did I do now?". So sad that the pill bottle will be the legacy! The hope that her action will wake people up makes me wonder how many others thought this. I like the significance of the 8. I would take out the word "guess" and keep the statement bold and direct here.

In the last line I notice a typo "lie" should be "like" I think. *Wink* The narrative is coherent and easy to follow with a intense vibration that prompts our emotional response. Well done!

*Star* Thanks for sharing such a heart wrenching vision of a reality, often hidden.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar



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In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Amanda! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Unicorn* AW! I could not resist the evocative title and of course, I like unicorns and already felt bad he was sad, so had to check it out.

*Balloonp* What a cute little poem story and you show why he feels sad and yet will use what he is teased for in a positive way. This is a good lesson story for all of us and kids might like it too.

*Balloonr* The poem is a quatrain with a consistent aabb rhyme. The images are vivid and I could really feel for the little guy. You reveal how he thinks in a third person narrative.
I notice the rhythm is not always even by syllable count, yet it flowed quite well when I read aloud.
The places that threw me out a bit was line 4. I wanted to add "he's a guy" for a better flow as it feels short. Line 6 and 7 felt long and cumbersome..maybe "the bright colour feature..." and maybe" a regular colour"--we know he is an animal. I like the idea of "at least duller"! LOL

*Balloonb*There is hope that perhaps his job with kids will lighten him up as they will see his value! *Smile*

*Unicorn*Thanks for this charming poem with its wistful tone! *Smile*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



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23
Review of Autumnal Haiku  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: E | (3.5)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews*CakeP*


*Balloonp* Happy Party Time Valerie ! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Delight*I love reading haiku and continue to study its form as I learned it's essence is a lot deeper than just syllable count. *Wink* Your title gave me the theme and season and while Haiku apparently do not use titles, we often to so we know which is which. LOL

*Balloonr* Your haiku follows the old style syllable count well and I you have two images that you are contrasting: the wind and the leaves. The last line repeats the season. You already used the kigo words "coloured leaves" so the reader knows already it is autumn.
It is a really good attempt as you have no punctuation, it is centered and you have a seasonal word and it is about nature. Good for you.*Salute* Not everyone gets that. Less is more. *Wink*

*Wink*You might play with your two images in a different way and add if you want to stick with the 5-7-5:

the colourful leaves
falling down from the oak trees
crisp morning wind

or something like that.

See how you observe two images without any subjective feeling about it, as you did in your original. And it leaves the reader to add their own picture or understanding. I got that from your version. Only the last line was really not needed. *Wink* Haiku also does not use sentences. *Shock*

Thanks for creating this lovely vision and practicing the challenging haiku form. *Starstruck* Thank you for letting me play with your craft.

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar in "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



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24
Review of One Way Ticket  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Balloonp* Heya Jeff! I am happy to do a review to celebrate you! *Delight*


I missed this round of the contest I think ... the picture is dark and familiar anyway and your poem picked up the idea of the ferryman! I remember the myth. LOL Your title is excellent for the theme and punch line at the end too. It made me smile after the dark image you portrayed earlier in the poem. Wierd me! *Wink*

*Salute* Your etheree is well composed and flows coherently. I think it is a challenge to do! Your rhymes were thematic as well as true rhymes. You did use "sea" and "undersea"....not sure if repeating is the best, yet in this case it works well. *Wink* It does provide a contrast as the boat is above on the sea and the...deathly ones from under now that I study deeper.

*Balloong* I was drawn into the flow with the first lines...reading aloud is a delight with the "s" and "d" alliterative quality. The consonance of d and b produced harsh tones that fit the atmsophere. The first word is like an inviation or soft command...and then we realize the direction. LOL Well written.

*Star* Your etheree fit the prompt in a tradtional way and the fact that the girl is looking back made your last line even more potent. She may be hoping to go back. *Sad* Thanks for the vision. I think I will go back to the happy party now! *Laugh*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group



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25
Review of Light  
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
*Balloonp* Hiya Sophy! Happy Party Time! I am popping in with a short review to celebrate you! *Delight*


*Balloonp* The title drew me in as we are all light and I was curious! I enjoy cinquains and forgot there was a mirror one. It is interesting how many forms do have mirror aspects. LOL
I think the concept works well with the theme of light..as I think of reflection. *Wink*

*Heartv* Aw! This is so romantic a vision and I could enter right into the dream. The dashes that split the lines in each verse really work for pause and drama. Good call. The enjambents there were effective too. *Thumbsup* The imagery of the dancing light and the touching in verse two are vibrant ones. Wow.

*Balloonp* The mirror cinquain form is well composed and the pictures both occur in the lighted space. A nice comparison of the light playing and then the poet playing on the sleeper. Brilliant! *Star* The punctuation served the read well and I was not thrown out by any glitch.

*Starstruck* Thanks for sharing this lovely vision and your craft. I enjoyed my visit very much.
Keep on shining at WDC with your unique flair! *Fire*

Light on the path as you write on!
eyestar at "WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group




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