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576 Public Reviews Given
579 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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151
151
Review of The Artist  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I really enjoyed reading this. I could picture an artist sitting at his canvas, painting. I could see the colors as he puts them on the canvas. Rhythm, flow and rhyme all work really well together. This was beautifully written. Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M. Ray
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152
Review of The Horizon  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
"All, conditions of life" - do you really need the comma after the word "All"? it seemed to me to break up the rhythm a bit in this line.

Other than that, I think you did wonderful on this. Great emotion, great message. Other than what I pointed out above, the rhythm seemed to work very well. Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M. Ray
153
153
Review of Gratitude  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
What a beautiful story of how adoption can go so well. Sadly, not all adoptions end this way. You did beautifully on this and I really loved reading it. It was well-written and what I loved the most is the fact that it was written from the heart. Great job and keep writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
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154
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
You make such valid points in this! Your observations are well-thought out, well-written and well-rounded. I personally believe that our education system is more interested in statistics rather than a good education for EVERY student, and that is the sad state of our country. You put this out there in a very good rant article. Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
155
155
Review of She  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
What a beautiful poem for your wife! I hope she loved it! The rhythm and flow seemed to work well, and I could really feel your strong love for her. You really did well on this. I saw nothing that detracted from the poem or caused difficulty reading it. Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
156
156
Review of The Cow Caper  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was quite amusing! The rhythm and flow worked very well, and the rhyme scheme was spot on. Great job on this! I can see why it won the Writer's Cramp for March 17, 2017! I could actually feel the plight of the cow trying to escape a horrible fate. Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
157
157
Review of Spirit Dance  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hey, Ken! It's me again. I loved this poem. Based on your description of the Kyrielle Sonnet, you followed this form very well. I love the repetition of the line, "The wind sings of your love to me." The rhythm and flow of this poem is spot on. I can feel the love in this poem. Wonderful job here. Keep up the great writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
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In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
I could really feel your pain as I read through this. You were able to express deep pain in few words. Just remember, you are not alone. There are those who are with you on your journey, even when it feels you are all alone. This was well-written. I hope and pray all works out for you. Keep writing - writing can be very therapeutic!

B.M. Ray
159
159
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
This was well-written. I could feel the pain of how it's not fair that your loved one is there and you are here. The only issue I saw was "hop and pray" - believe it should be spelled "hope"...Other than that, great job. The rhythm and flow of this poem was spot on. The rhyme did well, too. Keep up the great writing!

B.M. Ray
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160
Review of The Debt  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Jeff - this was well-written. And it points out just how manipulative us humans can be. I read through this twice - mainly because I was intrigued by the story. I would love to see where this would go if it was continued. Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M. Ray
161
161
Review of An Angel's Prayer  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, Ken! I just read this poem and loved it. Rhythm and flow were spot on! Rhyme scheme perfection. And such a valuable lesson in this poem. You really painted a picture with your words. I could see the angel kneeling in prayer, and you kneeling beside her. Beautifully written! Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie M. Ray
162
162
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
You did really well on this! The rhythm and flow work really well with the rhyme scheme. Such love as expressed in this shows just how much God loves us! Just reading this gives one hope. Keep up the wonderful writing and keep the faith! It will get you where you need to be!

B.M. Ray
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163
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a beautiful tribute to your mom, and as such, I really hesitate to give any feedback that would suggest improvements - especially, because as you stated in the first paragraph, you were writing this the same day she passed away. It is raw with love and emotion, and the hurt you felt when she passed away. That being said, I will offer my suggestions for you to either use or discard as you see fit:

"Love those who might not know God love otherwise" - I believe "God's" would work just a bit better here.

"to love those who might know love otherwise. " - I think adding the word "not" between might and know would work better because it seems your mom's message was to show love where one has not known love before.

"I heard her say that I love you but I do not like what you are doing." - I heard her say, "I love you, but I do not like what you are doing."

There are other examples, such as her and Dad quipping, "Where did we get this guy?" - but I don't want to tear apart your poignant piece about your mother.

Please accept my suggestions as just that -suggestions. They are in no way meant as disrespect or to hurt you during an already painful time. Whether you change this or not, it is still a very beautiful tribute to your mother, and I really enjoyed reading!

Keep writing - it is healing!

B.M. Ray
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164
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Schnujo! This was cute! I loved it. It was simple, yet it flowed well from one line to the next! Great job! Maybe silly, but a great poem for little ones - or for anyone who needs to smile! This is a wonderful picture in words - easy for anyone to imagine! Keep up the great writing!
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165
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I loved reading this! I could feel the stress and anxiety! And sadly, in this day and age, sometimes it feels like it is machines taking care of us rather than people. The flow and rhythm of this poem seemed spot on to me. Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M. Ray
166
166
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This poem was a blessing to me. I enjoyed reading it - and it helped to reaffirm my faith. The rhythm and flow were spot on, and the rhyming worked well, too. It's also nice to know I'm not the only one writing poems about God and His love! Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M. Ray
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167
Review of Dear Me (2013)  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
Wonderful! I love how honest you are in this. And with it being a complaint letter to the 2012 Dear Me letter, (which I did read), it's the perfect let-down to the excitement from 2012 hype. Beautifully written with a very good lesson that arbitrary deadlines do more harm than good. Great job here! Write on!

B.M. Ray
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168
Review of Dear Me (2012)  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
This is absolutely brilliant! I love how you turned your Dear Me letter into an advertisement letter! The flow of the letter is great. The impact of the letter is awesome! True sales pitch here - if I hadn't learned a few hard lessons myself, I might just purchase a package..Keep up the wonderful writing!

B.M.Ray
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169
Review of Heaven's Bed  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This had beautiful rhythm and flow. The rhyme scheme worked very well. There's a message in this poem - and it's easy for the reader to catch that message. I love how you describe amber clouds. Wonderful job on this poem. Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie
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170
Review of Tempest  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: ASR | (5.0)
I loved this! It was a great read! The rhythm, the flow and the rhyme scheme worked perfectly to make this story flow. I could feel the wrath of woman as I read this, and as per your style, the last line not only explained the reason for her fury, but made me laugh! Oh, the joys of married life! You did very well on this! Keep up the great writing!

Bonnie
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171
Review of Endless Ripples  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is beautiful! I could see the ripples on the water's surface as I read this. I love your last stanza, comparing the ripples on the waters to the ripples of friends in our lives. Rhythm and flow were perfect and the rhyme scheme worked out wonderfully. A beautiful poem by a talented writer. Keep up the great writing!

Bonnie
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172
Review of Never Was  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
"indeed !" - Don't think there needs to be a space after the word "indeed"

Other than this, you did a wonderful job on this poem. Rhythm and flow was spot on (as usual,) and the rhyme scheme was beautifully done. I have often felt as though I was in this dark place of "Never Was"....lol. Keep up the great writing!

Bonnie

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173
Review of Winter  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is beautiful! I can really see the snow, the birds...and I can see the cat crouched on the back of the couch! The rhythm, flow and rhyme flow together so well! You really have a talent for painting a picture with words! Keep up the wonderful writing, my friend!

Bonnie
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174
Review of " Lonely Track "  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love this! The emotion is raw. I really felt the pain as I read this. It was a smooth read, the rhythm and flow flawless. You say that this isn't too bad, but I have news for you - it's absolutely brilliant! Keep up the wonderful writing! I really enjoyed this one!

Bonnie
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175
Review of The Drinking Pool  Open in new Window.
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
This was beautiful! I can really picture the snow, the deer, houses covered in white..and I can smell the snow as it falls. The rhythm, the flow and the rhyme all work so well together - it makes for a wonderful read. Keep up the wonderful writing!

Bonnie
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