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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Carolyn, I see you suggest you were feeling slightly unhinged. I know how you feel. How sick are we are at always protecting ourselves from those who'd do us harm, take what's not theirs for their own without much effort?
Yes, I too sometimes feel like shouting, "come on in the door is open, tramp through my life, my home, take what I have."

I loved your sarcasm, your denial of cats—that's the one which got me—and all the lines which attempt to show your disdain for those who wish us ill.

Great little poem, hope you felt better after letting off some steam.

Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, I came across this intriguing story on Read and Review. It was a very interesting read. It didn’t really surprise me, although I guess it should, after all it’s difficult to believe the British are so gullible. However it probably would work anywhere, at least in any wealthy country, where the wealthy have more money than sense.
I suppose the experiment proves something, although what I’m still unsure. You write, he wanted to manipulate the internet. Well, we all know, or should by now, the internet is full of lies and illusion. We’re all being constantly manipulated, either by fake news, deep fakes or clever scammers.
Have we learned nothing since the tale of ‘The Emperor’s New Clothes’?
People wanted to believe and yes, to be able to brag how wonderful they were because they’d seen them with their own eyes.
I think Mr Butler is nothing more than a man with too much time on his hands and is no better than one of the thousands of scammers we need to be on guard against on a daily basis.
Anyway thanks for sharing.

Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello again, what a delicious pay back story. How wonderful it was for Helen to put Evelyn in her place. She was very condescending, especially when she presumed Helen might not be able to afford a suitable dress for a party. You did a great job with the word prompts. I’m always amazed at the different stories that get written using the same three little words to spark ideas.
Great job as usual. I hope you did well in the contest.
Sue


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Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "Promises of God" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello, Amethyst Angel 🌼 Author Icon I am reviewing this poem for I Write in 25.
I’m probably not the right person to be commenting on this. Firstly I’m not a poet and secondly not religious. However as the saying goes I know what I like.

This poem is about faith. Faith has such a powerful meaning for such a small word. What is faith I ask myself and how do I, myself, travel through life without having much of it?
What do I have faith in?
I have faith in myself that I will always be there for my friends and family if I’m needed.
Do I have faith in others? Not really.
Do I have faith in world leaders that they will stop the killing and attempt to find peace? Again the answer is No.
I was raised to be an agnostic. On my father’s war record which I recently found he named his religion as Realism. So as you can probably guess how I see the world.
Having said all that I wished I did have faith in a supreme being who will rescue me in times of trouble.
I loved reading your poem and envy you your faith. May it be rewarded.

Sue


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Review of Tightrope  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi, Keaton, I came across this short poem on Read and Review. It was written so long ago and I wondered what it was that had inspired you.
It’s been so long since hanging or indeed the death penalty itself, has been in force in Australia. I think the last man to hang was in the fifties, almost three quarters of a century ago.
The death penalty is a subject which divides people. I can understand the eye for an eye point of view and yet is it really civilised to deliberately take another’s life? Doesn’t that make the law makers just as culpable?
Good poem though and food for thought.
Cheers Sue


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Review of Peace of Mind  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
I came across this story when I visited your portfolio. The reason I was there in the first place was because I’d read something in your blog which made me curious.
I had read your story about time and the watch repairer and I liked it very much. This story Peace of Mind is also one which resonates with me. Peace of mind is an invaluable, intangible asset to have, but it’s also so hard to come by, especially now with all the talk of war and so much violence in the world. The only way we can have peace of mind is to do what we can locally, in our communities and within our family.
I did smile as I pictured the Chemist and the Cafe Proprietor each crossing the road to find a cure for their headaches. You are so right, we all have the answer to our problems within us, yet we seek answers elsewhere for the cure.
Thank you for sharing this wisdom.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (4.5)
Hello, I’m reviewing this story for I Write. I was more than interested to read this story as a fellow entrant in the same contest. Quotation Inspiration does what it usually does and gives a quotation prompt which may lead us a million different ways. This month’s prompt was no exception. I liked your take on it as your protagonist strives to make the most of her struggles to be allowed to live her dream, that of working in a sector to which she’s most suited.
The overpowering teacher/mother made my blood boil and I hoped this was not a true story, although I have the feeling there is more than a grain of truth in it.
I wish you success in the contest. Thank you for sharing a compelling read.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, Jim thank you so much for sharing this story. It popped up on Read and Review and I’m so pleased it did.
Of course this was written in 2010 but it doesn’t alter the fact that this happened.
I’ve heard of people doing this and one does wonder WHY.
In this case the couple who paid someone else’s bill so generously were young and had four young children. They didn’t appear to be people who were affluent, and with such a large family it was highly unlikely they would have been. And yet they did such an unusual thing. All sorts of questions one wants to ask. You mentioned a couple of reasons but it still makes me think there was more to it, but what the real reason was I couldn’t say. Maybe someone had done the same for them and they were just passing on the good deed.

Some things stay in one’s mind don’t they, even many years later?
Is it that kindness is so rare these days? I hope not and that these random acts of kindness happen more frequently than we know.

Thanks again for sharing. It’s a nice story to go to sleep thinking about.

I don’t think you’re working two jobs these days Jim, are you?

Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, Mia, I have read this and the introduction as directed and I’ve fanned you, as I see your potential. I’m sorry I didn’t notice or welcome you when you first joined WdC three months ago.

Oh my, your introduction blew me away. How can someone so young know themselves and others so well? Triggering is a word not in my vocabulary until recently. You list all the potential triggers and pitfalls reading your words may promote in others, as if you have experienced many of them.

Anxiety, a word which wasn’t mentioned back when I was a child and yet I know my mother was gripped by it. I’m speaking of a time so long ago you as a teen perhaps would think of as ancient history.
I wonder if you’ve ever heard of generational trauma? My mother’s anxiety has been passed down through the generations and as an eighty year old, I, my daughter and her daughter deal with anxiety on a day to day basis.
Being a writer you are in the unique position of being able to express your feelings through the medium of words. I hope you continue to cultivate your talent. It will assist you throughout your life journey.

In the introduction I loved that you keep your discarded/lost characters close and still converse with them. I’m sure they’ll continue to make their presence known in further stories.

As for the prologue, it’s a great hook and makes this fan want to read more.
Write on.
Sue


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for entry "Smoke Signals" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
I came across this entry for Flash Fiction in which you were not only required to write using less than 300 words but to use the three prompt words. I have always like to read the Flash Fiction entries as they are usually great at meeting the restrictions.
This little story was no exception. You managed to tell a story with a beginning, middle and an ending with a lesson included. What better lesson for a parent to learn than when a child, in his innocence, makes you see the error of your ways.

There was just one paragraph which you could make clearer and that was this one: They were in the kitchen and Nancy held him while he washed his hands and sat down to his potato salad. She wondered how to handle this
Perhaps use talked to him rather than held him?
Great little story, I enjoyed reading it.
Sue


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Review of Post-destroyed.  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Well, hello, welcome to WdC. I found this personal opinion piece on Read and Review.
Your opinion on romance leaves little to the imagination. You laid it out there, naked for all to see. I feel you have a jaundiced view on the trials and tribulations of love. If I had to guess I’d say you’d been hurt by someone, perhaps someone you thought loved you.
Of course I may be completely wrong and you are a totally complete person not needing anyone to share your life with.
I suppose it doesn’t matter, but I did what I always do when I’m reviewing and that is to check the bio. Disappointed, I found you hadn’t filled it in, so I’m unable to guess whether you’re female or male or anything about you at all. If I had to have a stab at your gender though, I’d say male.
I’ve lived a very long time and married for sixty of those years to the same person. As for romance my husband doesn’t have a romantic bone in his body. Yet we raised a family together, have faced many trials and bad times together and that to me is romantic in a completely different sense of the word. Let’s change romance to loyalty. I find his loyalty more than any flowers or romantic gestures.
Till death us do part. Now that’s what I call romance.

Just pointing out a few typos in your piece.
In the penultimate line you omitted a word after distopian, such as world maybe?
The last line: infant did you mean to write in fact?
Sue


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for entry "A story of Strength" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
What a beautiful entry for The Bard’s Hall Contest. I read each line and everything you wrote inspires me to be better. Your first line reminds me of the times when I’ve taken a deep breath, wiped away the tears and just got on with it. I’m sure all of us have done at some point yet not realising we are beginning life anew each time we don’t give in.
The line about age just being a number reminded me of a line from a song I heard recently. The line was how old would you be if you never knew the day you were born?. That set me thinking and I considered the fact that each day (depending on various factors) I feel a different age. Sometimes 30 sometimes 80!
Every perfectionist like to hide his imperfections. I’m glad not to be a perfectionist then, it must be really hard work.
Thank you for your positivity, although I know you’ve many reasons not to be so positive. You’re a great example to those of us who have nothing too bad to complain about yet still do.
Sue


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Review of The Habit  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hi, Bill, I saw this story on newsfeed the other day but had forgotten the title. I had to go and scroll through your portfolio until I found it as I had intended reviewing it at the time of reading.
Of all the many clever horror stories I’ve read of yours, this one in particular made me squirm. I am ok with guts spilling out on to the ground and puddles of blood, that’s a physical horror which could happen to any of us, given the right bus at the wrong time!
But the horror of a predator with no conscience and little girls, is one that remains in one’s mind and seeps out in the darkness of night in dreams. It leaves one wondering which one walking amongst us has such evil intentions.
Well done for making this horror genre fan feel repulsed.
Cheers Sue


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Review of OC-Done  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, I read your story with interest as I’m also writing, or trying to, a story for the same contest using the same prompt! I know a few people who have been diagnosed with this condition and none had it as badly as your protagonist. Wouldn’t it be dreadful to be so rigid and paranoid about every tiny detail? It would take so much longer to get anything done.
Your description of her compulsions was very detailed, I began to feel anxious myself!
You certainly followed the instructions to show and not tell, I almost felt as if I was in her kitchen! Well done.
Good luck in the contest.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, this tasty little item popped up in Read and Review. Thank you for sharing this recipe, I still couldn’t conjure up how this meal was to be eaten despite the colourful picture. What would you eat first? Would you eat the chicken with your fingers, (finger lickin’ good)? Only then would you tackle the waffles? But then it becomes two separate dishes doesn’t it? Waffles aren’t my favourite thing. I prefer pancakes myself. As for chicken, I never fry it. I love a roast chicken though served with mashed potato and vegetables. I did smile when I read that you’d add a small bowl of fruit to the meal. I guess it would take the edge off the guilt having consumed so many calories!
So International Waffle Day passed me by, I’m afraid. I wonder if there is an International day of the chicken?


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Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "The Man in the Hat" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello, again. I’m reviewing this entry for I Write. I wasn’t familiar with the contest you wrote this for, so I checked it out. But before I had I had guessed the highlighted sentence must have been the prompt.

I read the story and my first thought was ‘well done!’ You took the prompt and ran with it. Your descriptions of the characters and the setting made it easy to imagine everything. For such a simple story it was highly entertaining. A feel good ending too was a bonus.
Thank you for sharing.
Sue


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Review of Not Without Sight  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hello, Fyn, I found this story on Read and Review. I found it a very touching and enjoyable read.
I was intrigued about how Wendy wrote in her diary in Braille. I had no idea it was even possible. I’ll have to research the method that enables vision impaired people to write. Of course nowadays days Wendy would have used a computer. Text to type would have made her life so much easier, I know it is for me even though I can see. I use it all the time when I’m sending a long text message.
The ending was heartbreaking, but Wendy bore her grandmother’s death well and was confident she and her grandfather would manage just fine.
Thanks for sharing.
Sue


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Thank you for another joyful entry. I love how you find the joy in so many places. It was nice of you to accompany your friend to a coffee tasting especially as coffee is not your drink of choice. I’m reviewing your blog for I Write and am inspired by your commitment to the Contest by entering each day. Those veggie puffs and samosas sound delicious. I visited India a few years ago and the food was the best part of our vacation.
Looking forward to more of your “good” days.
Sue.


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Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "Sunflower" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Hello, I’m reviewing this sweet poem for I Write.
The sunflower is such a unique plant. She (I feel a sunflower must be a girl) lifts her head and points her face to the sun. She grows quickly like a child and yes, she does seem to be smiling. It’s hard for anyone not to smile when seeing her glorious bright yellow head.
It’s a lovely poem and suitable for a child as the prompt requires.
Thanks for sharing.
Sue.


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Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Good morning, I’m reviewing your charming anecdote for I Write.

Oh the joys of single sex schools. Your drama experience brought a smile to my face, especially the last line.

My granddaughter is a drama teacher in an all boys school and is in the process of completing her PhD on the benefits of drama for boys.
Playing different characters, even if they’re not the glamorous roles one might have coveted, can be fun as well as confidence building as you have clearly shown. I hope you received the accolades you surely deserved by an appreciative audience.
Thank you for sharing this memory in your blog, I’m looking forward to reading more this month.
Sue


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Review of Funland  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, Jacky, this is another gem of yours which popped up on Read and Review. I loved the dialogue between the siblings, it flowed well and seemed authentic.
Time. You’re right about time and how the speed seems to change depending on what’s happening. I’m always remarking on the fact the day had either been long or short, and of course it’s neither, still the same 24 hours worth.
Well, time’s a-ticking and time for bed.
Thanks for sharing this fun story.
Sue


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Review of Stand Still  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, Richard, this story popped up on Read and Review. The title, Stand Still, made me stop and read and I’m pleased I did.
One wonders why this trauma you were made to endure was never spoken of again. Even to this day. Yet it still troubles you. It’s good you are able to write it on the page, even if you’re unable to say the words.
The reaction you showed at being abandoned in such a hostile environment reminded me of when my son fell into the swimming pool at aged two. His sister, four years older had seen him and called out. He just stood, like you, on the bottom of the pool. Not panicking, not breathing and yet he made no sound for the rest of the day. He was in shock and so were you. It was a cruel thing to do intentionally and I’m sad for that four year old.

I think the sentence: In his jokingly way by his actions told my Mother he wanted her but he didn’t want me. could be made clearer.
Perhaps drop the jokingly way and say:His actions were to let my mother know although he wanted her he didn’t want me.

Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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Review of Destroyed  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: 18+ | (4.0)
Hello, I’m reviewing this story for I Write in 25. I’m unsure of my reactions to the story. I understand the trauma people go through after a tragedy as they look for someone to blame or turn the blame onto themselves. When it’s a child that’s been lost, whether by illness or accident, it makes it so much harder. Grief often comes between couples as each grieves in their own way.

I try to put myself in the place of a loved one when justice seems not to be served. It’s understandable they would seek vengeance.

In this case, your story, both parties turn to religion to assist in healing. But what happens if religion isn’t a part of their lives? How would the story resolve? I’d be interested in an alternative ending. I know for myself I wouldn’t find peace or forgiveness in religion.

Your story is well written, these dreadful traumas happen on a day to day basis and I’m sure all don’t have a happy ending. However I’m pleased your characters all found their solutions to be able to continue to live in peace.

Thank you for sharing this story.
Sue.


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Review of The Big Break  Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, this story came up as a suggestion in Read and Review. As usual, Jacky you nailed it. The flash fiction genre is certainly something you excel at.
This story is no exception. I could almost feel Jean’s eagerness to be allowed to show what she was made of. She was determined to be better than the actress she had been understudy for. But it wasn’t as I imagined a Shakespearean piece of theatre. I laughed at the image at the end. Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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Review of Angel Feathers  Open in new Window.
for entry "A Prayer" Open in new Window.
Review by Sumojo Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
I’m reviewing this poem for I Write in 25.

What a loving and thoughtful thing to do for your friend. A free verse poem written with love for a successful and healthy pregnancy. I do know from experience things don’t always go to plan. All we can do is put our faith in the medical profession and with the Lord.

I especially liked that you prayed your friend would find the fortitude needed to be a good mother. Fortitude is something all parents need a large supply of at times.

The line I loved most was a wish for the child to have a happy childhood. I think that’s what all parents hope they can give. Happiness is found in knowing unconditional love, not in having material wealth. Security is knowing that whatever happens they’ll always have a home.

Thank you for sharing.
Sue.


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