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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi, Megan, I’ve just seen your story in the Editor’s Pick in this week’s Newsletter by Dawn.
I’ve not actually reviewed much of your work. This is very remiss of me given the fact you are my most prolific reviewer and for which I thank you.
Writing dialogue only is so different from any other way of writing a story. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one from you before, but I might be wrong. You did a great job here, Megan. I could feel the indignation from your character as she stands up to the man from the IRS. I suppose we all know that in the end the taxman always gets his pound of flesh, don’t we?
However she certainly gave him a piece of her mind, which gave me a smile. I could almost imagine a scene where eight hundred dollar bills are thrown at him as he attempts to escape her wrath.
I’ve also made an attempt at this contest so it will be fun reading all the different excuses as to why we shouldn’t pay the taxman.
Good job. Thanks for sharing a fun read.
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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for entry "Little Blue" 
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hello, I’m next in line at I Write in 24 and I was very happy to read your story.
The prompt is one I’d read before and had considered I might attempt. You seemed to have no difficulty in structuring a tale that sounded almost plausible.
I loved the alien character’s name, Little Blue. There was certainly no threat posed by such a sweet creature.
Maybe you’d had some knowledge of ‘mean girls,’ if not the interactions between Sandy and those girls came across as genuine.
The dialogue used by Little Blue was great and I had no difficulty in imagining the scenes on the beach and on arrival at the new planet, which I might add sounds as if it’s a much nicer place than our Planet Earth is at the moment. Sandy was a lucky girl to find such a mode of transport which enabled her to travel so many miles in such a short time.
Your paragraph spacing made it so easy to read for which I thank you.
The prompt was very specific and you completed each of the three sections perfectly.
Thank you for sharing a lovely heartwarming read. Good luck with the contest.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Snowy, My Love  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Hi, Ashok, ten years is a life time to a sixteen year old. I bet you could hardly remember a time without your Snowy. It’s a testament to your love for her that you were never able to bring yourself to get another fur companion.
Poetry is a difficult genre to write even when English is your native language but to write a 36 line poem from the heart in a second language is amazing. Thank you for sharing your experience of life and loss.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of The Climb  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
George was what you might call a man scorned and poor old Bob certainly was paying for his bit of fun with Natasha.
it is a great piece of flash fiction. In such a few words, I’m unsure of exactly how many, you told a whole story from the beginning to the end.

I just couldn’t envisage where the actual scene is taking place. Were they half way up a mountain or was it a very deep well? Or perhaps even mineshaft? Not knowing how George managed to get his wife and Bob into their predicament set my mind working overtime. Did he render them unconscious somehow?
Anyway that doesn’t detract from what is a great little revenge story.
Thanks for sharing.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
5
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Dear Genipher, what a sweet story. I’m a bit of a sucker for rabbits and the thought of two space travellers in rabbit form dragged me down your rabbit hole to discover what was afoot.
Flopsy, the ensign, sounded as if she was prepared for every eventuality but wasn’t the best pilot of their craft. I was intrigued as to what they were going to discover on this strange planet.
Although they couldn’t understand the foreign tongue they did realise the alien wasn’t dangerous after saving them from the jaws of the dog and yet they still found themselves in a bit of a predicament, but Captain Thumper has a plan.
After I’d finished reading I felt as if I was at the Saturday matinee when I was a child, left to wait until next week to wonder how the heroes could possibly escape last week’s cliffhanger.
A great adventure interspersed with humour such as: “I guess that answers that question,” the Captain grumbled, brushing dust off his white fur. After the ship blew up in a cloud of dust and That would just be icing on the carrot cake,” Thank you for giving me a smile.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: ASR | (3.5)
Hi, I’ve just read your essay for GoT and must applaud you for being part of such a difficult challenge.
You have obviously given much thought to the trials of living in today’s world for young people growing up, They are channelled into thinking a certain way by the media and being endlessly bombarded advertising and influencers. There was no such title as an influencer when I was growing up and little advertising, so hopefully the way I see the world hasn’t been manipulated by too many outside interests.

There were a few things that I noted which would improve this piece.
I think growing up is hard for both women and men, or any gender you are. I think this would read better if you wrote: Growing up is hard for all of us…
The inner voice that guides us, worry us, and tells some if us bad things can be guided by so much of what we read and watch
You could re-read this sentence and clarify what you meant to convey. Perhaps you meant to say: We should listen to our inner voice and be aware of how the media can manipulate our opinions?
I wondered if you had centralised some of the text inadvertently, as that is how it’s reading after the first paragraph.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts on such a complex topic and I wish you luck in your attempt to complete your difficult mission in GoT.
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Seasons  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is such a sweet story.
You described so well that boiling anger after a huge row. It’s like a volcano has erupted and there is nothing to do but to leave the space you and the other participant are sharing, not to do so is unthinkable and almost impossible.
I could almost see Elliot storming away, blind and deaf to everything and everyone around him. The heat of anger propelling him forward until he reaches the park.
It’s then the anger dissipates leaving him deflated. Suddenly and unexpectedly an intense feeling of sadness overwhelms him as the adrenaline leaves his body and he is confused as to what has just happened.
And then the reader of this story is suddenly able to relax as you find that Rachel has experienced the same feelings and has followed him.
Those words, ‘I’m sorry,” so simple, but sometimes they are so hard to say.
It’s a heartwarming story of a small moment in time that happens in everyone’s lives. Thank you for sharing.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of With Grace  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I’m reviewing your poem as next in line for I Write in 24.
As a dog lover myself I understand all the emotions one gets from a four legged friend. And yes they are really your friend, sometimes better than the two- legged variety. They never judge or take offence. They seem to understand all of your moods. They know when you’re sad, angry or happy.
When you’re away they pine and long for your return. They’ll speak to you when you return to tell you how much you were missed. Even if you were out of the house for ten minutes or ten days!
They’ll put their head on your lap to comfort you when you’re crying.
In just eight lines you have encapsulated what a dog can do for their treasured family member. I liked the way each line started with the same word. I particularly enjoyed the last line about how she nests in your hair. Then I had a thought, Grace may be a cat. I had a bit of a hard time imagining my Weinmarana dog doing that!
But whether she is a cat or a dog, you expressed your love beautifully.
All this for your Grace and for me; my Lucy girl.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hello Lexi, you’ve certainly made a terrific start here at WdC and I welcome you and hope you find what you need here. There are many people who will give you help with anything, be it feedback or just encouragement.
I really enjoyed this first chapter of The Bentleys. The story is very original, I’m pretty sure I’ve not read about a family of well-to-do mice before.
I liked the name you have chosen for the family. The name is synonymous with an expensive brand of English car and reminds of English gentry.
Crumberry street is an ideal situation for the mice as they love crumbs of any description. I’m getting a feeling though that the family’s fortunes are about to change, although I may be wrong. I’m certainly going to check out chapter two when I have the time.

There was just the one grammatical error or typo I saw. And though you may be wondering, ‘why on earth would a mouse need a lawyer?’, you would be quite surprised. The comma after lawyer should be before the question mark.
Excellent story so far.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Time to reign  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Thank you for an interesting story. The steampunk genre is one I have found difficult to write, however you told quite a story in under three hundred words. Time travel stories have endless opportunities to expand your imagination, nothing is off limits.
This particular story has connotations of a fairy story. The protagonist is kept captive by the wicked King in this case he’s forced to remain until a solution is found. When Terence and Eli find the solution, they use it not as a key for release but as a means of escape and further riches.
Good job with the prompt.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Hi, Carly, this a great little story. The first sentence reminded me of that weird feeling of having to leave home before dawn to catch a flight. Already you know it’s not a normal day as you drive to the airport in the dark. Your description of the chaos which greets the traveller on entering the airport was spot on. All those tired, disoriented, stressed people milling around with their luggage.
Roy sounds a most unpleasant character and Ryna, the long suffering wife finally sees the light and runs off to Paris. That was very satisfying.

Going away despite the huge fight we had had only… perhaps that might read better as simply fight we had only…Or fight we’d had only…

Well done on this story, it fulfilled the prompt brilliantly. I hope you did well in the contest.
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Jay, I’m honoured, this is the first time anyone dedicated anything to me. I love your Haiku, almost as much as my Yorkshire tea cuppa.
Haiku poems are notoriously difficult to convey meaning, or so I have found on my few forays into the genre. You did a superb job. A haiku about tea? Maybe a first I’d venture to say.
Thank you, Jay. I really appreciate your homage to tea.
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Jay, now you’re a speaking my language.
I love tea more than any other beverage. My darling husband has just this minute placed a cup of the hot steaming liquid next to my bed. I’m afraid though I’m about to disappoint you as to my unrefined taste buds. They’re not as developed as yours seem to be. Earl Grey can take a hike on his bike. It’s just not tea! Now I come from that little isle of which you speak and I can assure you those of us from ‘up north’ from those finer folk on The Strand, favour a stronger brew. Give us pots and pots of hot, strong Yorkshire tea. Unless it leaves stains on your mug, yes, I’m sorry I did say mug, forget the saucer, it’s just not tea. We Northerners love a cup of cha, a brew, a cuppa, anytime night or day. Good and strong and none of this floral, fruity stuff. Orange and cinnamon spice? That sounds more like chai. I’ve been to India where everyone drinks chai. Unrecognisable from Yorkshire Tea. Lots of condensed or evaporated milk and sugar. Although I had to admit after a long sleepless night on an Indian train it was the best cup of tea I’d ever had in my life!
Anyway, Jay, I’ll let you keep lifting your pinky finger whilst sipping your Earl Grey from a see-through bone China tea cup whilst I chug down my dark brown brew.
Bottoms up. Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of My introduction  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, Ashok, welcome to WdC. I’ve read everything in your portfolio. Your words are thoughtful and beautiful but I felt that sometimes they were filled with hurt?
I hope you enjoy your retirement after so many years of service to your country. I’ve noticed you’ve read some of my reviews. Thank you.
I sincerely hope you get something useful out of the site. Keep on writing those deep thoughts of yours.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of My Rainbow Bunny  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | N/A (Review only item.)
Hi, I’m reviewing this poem as next in line at ‘I Write in 24.’
Well, the first thing I noticed was that it was a very colourful poem. The next thing was not only was it colourful it used colourful language. Not in the sense that term usually refers too, but pretty, sweet language suitable to give or read out loud for a child with an Easter egg. It’s delightful.
The poem form you used was one I’d not previously seen but one I enjoyed.
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Goofing Off  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I came across this poem in ‘I write in 24.’ Although you weren’t the entry before me I felt I had to at least give you some praise for writing a poem using the rhyming abbc defe bgee hihb format. It took me a while to get my head around the concept of even attempting the prompt. So well done on that score.
Having said that I agree with the content of the poem. Goofing off is something we all should do now and again and I second the suggestion we turn off the phone now and again. Being always available no matter where one may be can cause a lot of stress. I often consciously leave my phone at home sometimes, especially if it’s somewhere that requires silence. There’s nothing more annoying when a phone goes off when someone is attempting to speak, or at the theatre .
So let’s all goof off soon.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Hi, Genipher, you did a great job on this rather difficult prompt. I’m still gathering the strength to enter the contest.
I found your dialogue easy to read and to differentiate the speakers.
This human of yours sounds a little masochistic though and seems to have a death wish. Looks like his/her wish was about to come true.
I only saw one error. As I was saying before so rudely interrupted… the word being is missing.
I laughed out loud on reading these two sentences:Now what do you need? I make a mean cup of tea.”

“We prefer our drinks to be without feelings.”
Thank you for giving me a smile today. Good luck in the contest, a worthy winner in my opinion..
Sue.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Fugitive  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
This is a terrific response to the prompt. I admire anyone who can write in the steampunk genre and this story has my admiration too.
In retrospect it is bizarre to even think a robot; the very word summons up technology and sophistication, is dependent on such old technology as a boiler! I suppose that’s why I have never succeeded in getting my head around steampunk. On one hand one can be doing amazing, futuristic feats and exploits, yet still have the need for steam, bellows, flying ships etc. It’s just too much for me to suspend belief for the time it takes to pen a story such as this.
Thank you for showing me how it’s done.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
Hi, Jeff, I found this story on Read and Review. I’m pleased I did because I enjoyed every word and was just sorry it ended as it did, that was my only complaint. Was this written as a chapter or perhaps as an idea you had for a novel?
It flowed really well from the start to the finish. It held me in suspense the whole time but as I said previously it had too many questions without answers. 1. Who was the boy? 2. Why would the men have hurt him? 3. Who were all those men? 4. Why did the narrator end with : “the last thing I remember…?
Well written, but too frustrating.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hello, Kathleen, I see you’re a newcomer to WdC, but certainly not to writing. You’re very welcome here and I hope you get whatever it is you’re interested in. Whether it be a place to show your work or to comment and assist others in theirs.
When looking for something to review I must admit I usually bypass poems. But this poem, ‘The stuff of virtue, stopped me in my tracks. Why? Because this is a gripe of mine, people who preach to anyone who’ll listen but behind closed doors they’re little more than, as you so profoundly state: stone busts again.
I love the language you have used in this poem. It led me to wonder if this same people, who are appear so pious, practice what they preach. Are they truly as virtuous as they seem?
The two stanzas complimented each other perfectly. Thank you for sharing your work.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Thank you for a wonderful story and a taste of the greatest show on earth, as the circus is known. You took me on a ride, I was wondering what Nico had in store for Rachel. Poor Rachel not only blinded by a silk scarf, she was blinded by love.
I laughed at the sentence about the bearded lady. He suggested he’d shave her and she could stand in for the unfortunate Natasha.
The last paragraph had me concerned for poor Rachel though as you wrote that was the last thing she remembered. I hope it was because of fainting and not being killed by an incompetent knife thrower.
You fulfilled the prompt perfectly and it was a well deserved win.
This was written so long ago, 22years! You must have been one of the original members of WdC. How it must have changed since then. I’m going to visit your portfolio and see what you’re up to these days. Thank you for a great read, I throughly enjoyed it.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Jim's So Fat  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (3.5)
Hi, Jim, well done for having a crack at writing a Limerick. I could hazard a guess and say you decided to place yourself as the butt of the joke.
Limericks are really difficult poems to write, I know from my past failures to do so. They seem on first glance to be a simple poem but the rules are there and must be followed, so say the sticklers.
I enjoyed the poem’s content very much, although try as I might I couldn’t get the lines to flow when saying them out aloud.
But that aside it made me smile. Thank you for that, Jim.
Good luck in the contest and I hope you had fun writing.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of Am I Obsessed?  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Hi, Jackson, I know a little of how you were feeling when you were exploring your ancestors. I dabbled, as have many people, and that feeling when you see a relative’s name crop up on a census form is truly exciting. Your mind goes to that night of the census so long ago and imagines their home and what they were spending the evening doing. What were their thoughts on the census? Were all the family at home? Did they have a visitor whose name needed to be included?. How amazing it would be to travel back in time, perhaps to 1910, and be a fly on the wall.
So no, I think it’s far from being an obsession but a natural urge to want to feel connected to a family who never even knew that one day you’d exist and want to be a part of that evening in 1910 and to say Hi.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review of My Life to Date  
Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (5.0)
Hi, Loyd, I read this story in the Senior Centre Forum.
As a dog person rather than a cat one, I’m not an aficionado on the behaviour of the feline species. People in the past have told me about the selfish nature of cats and that’s why they never appealed as a pet.
This story has only served to reinforce that belief.
I loved the way it was written from the cat’s point of view and as the story and the age of the cat progressed humans were found to be of more use.
This particular cat was undoubtedly particularly selfish, even to the point of thinking only of his stomach when his ‘owner,’ had the audacity to die before feeding him.
I liked the way you showed the cat’s simple assessment of time passing. The years passed; sometimes warm, sometimes cold.
At last he finds someone very much like himself and the two curmudgeons see out their days together.
It’s a really delightful tale, Loyd, just as I have come to always expect from you.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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Review by Sumojo
In affiliation with disABILITY WRITERS GROUP  
Rated: E | (4.0)
I came across this story in Read and Review and I’m pleased I did. For so few words you told quite a story. It reminded me of a piece of writing from the mind of Dickens when I first began to read.
The first line set the scene. A boy in the process of being banished from his home, a bag of money and a key. It was a good first line, informing the reader the story takes place in a much earlier era than today.
You give no age to the boy, so I’m having to presume he’s old enough to survive without the care of his benefactor.
I was intrigued as to what the deed or secret the boy promised he wouldn’t reveal. One could sense the feelings of injustice he felt. He had thought he could be trusted with the knowledge of the priest’s misdeed but had been proved wrong.
However he was to get his revenge in the end.
I liked the way you left space between the paragraphs making it easy to read and comprehend. The dialogue was good.
You did mention the room was adequate twice in such a short story. Perhaps you could change one of them for another descriptive word.
Thank you for sharing this charming tale.
Sue


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
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