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1,259 Public Reviews Given
1,301 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Conversational - I don't have a formal template. Comment to my perception of the work, both substance and technique; highlights & misses. My reviews are public by default, but I will gladly make private upon request.
I'm good at...
Poetry - I read aloud; respond to both art and craft; Short Story - I listen for the voice(s) and respond with how I perceive both the creative voice and technique; and effective use of writer's tools; Articles/Essays - I'll let you know how you keep it real and hold my interest. Comment to substance & technique, fact-checking, depth of research, logical flow.
Favorite Genres
I love to read ^_^
Favorite Item Types
Poetry, Short Stories, Articles / Essays
Public Reviews
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326
Review of Letter Home  
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


I enjoyed reading your 'letter' poem. It did read like a letter would in rhyme*Smile* Making mention of the kitchen sink, cute*Smile*

The rhyming words held the images in each paragraph together well, but reading aloud they sometimes sounded a bit forced. i would suggest you try deleting a few of the pronouns and see how you think it sounds as far as the beat and rhythm of the stanzas.
i.e., something like -
"I admit I was pleasantly confounded
Discoering your warnings completely unfounded"

This would be a fun children's poem, I think, and wish you luck with it*Thumbsup*

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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Review of A Moment in Time  
Rated: E | (4.5)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


So true, and reading your images evoked some poignant recollections of my childhood ~ does that signal approaching senility, when the images are so vivid ~ no, just your provocative piece, even to the thought that rise more frequently about what the ultimate future holds*Heart*

I like the opening sentence introducing the paragraphs, leading into the images therein. Engaging all my senses, well written in an easygoing reflective style.

I note but a few technical glitches i.e., "My newborn son's pulse against my lips as I kiss their hair." ~ note conflict in singular and plural?

Thank you for sharing this beautiful work!

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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328
328
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


Very picturesque and vivid images. The lighthouse seems to be more than just an edifice ~ something evoking a more eternal light*Star* Lead me well to the final line "Us"

Reading aloud, "Shines it blazing light" ~ "its" ??? or "in" ??? the image for me a bit confusing?

Reading aloud, the beat and flow were even in general, moved with ease from one image to the next.

Thank you for offering this beautiful work!
Keep Writing!
Kate
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329
329
Review of Love Come Back  
Rated: E | (4.0)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


This is a beautiful prayer, images so vivid and uplifting. Reading aloud, I felt a lightness in my voice as I read from one stanza through to the next.

A few questions, switching from personal "me" in the first stanza, to "us" with respect to "my redemption" in the second, then back to "me" in the third had me go back to look for a reference to others??? would it work better all personal???

also, the first line, possessive for angels (angel's or angels') or just use "angel wings" ???

Thank you for offering this uplifting, joyous message!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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330
330
Rated: E | (4.5)
e:smile}Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


Beautiful imagery with your words ~ the progression from the destructive aspects of fire to the healing tht occurs after the cleansing *thumsup* The use of colors to depict each image (red fire - burning; gray, smoke; green, healing, i.e.) makes me think it could be a good read for a youth audience. Show them how the words reflect such imagery*Star*

Reading aloud, each stanza held it's own image well and the flow and beat were fairy even throughout. Thank you for offering this beautiful work.

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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331
Rated: 18+ | (4.5)
Good idea for a story, left the characters open to interpretation. Basic information, allowing contributors to build the characters as well as the storyline!

Thank you for offering this entry. I enjoyed participating and look forward to returning for more.

Keep Writing!
Kate
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332
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Rated: E | (3.5)
Good idea for a poll. Good variety of selection.

I'm uncertain about the disclaimer that it's mainly for Christians ~ since you state there's another option for those who don't accept Christian teachings, is that the "other" request for email?

A couple of points I noted ~ "downright" one word, as is "another" ~ also Christian should be capitalized throughout as a proper term, I believe.

Thank you for offering this thought-provoking poll

Keep Writing!
Kate
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333
333
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is a delightful tribute*Smile*

Reading aloud, the rhyming in alternate lines of each stanza holds focus on the image in the stanza. The poem also tells an engaging story, with a logical progression to the tribute=conclusion.*Thumbsup*

The rhythm when reading aloud I notice a bit of unevenness, i.e., third stanza, for the stress/beat on key words, if you delete the word "And" in the fourth stanza see if you think it balances better with the rhythm of the second (rhyming) line???

Thank you for sharing this really great tribute!

Keep Writing!
Kate




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Review of the gulf at night  
Rated: E | (4.0)

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Thank you for this trip to the gulf ~ you describe this in such vivid detail, I can feel the sand and smell the ocean, though I have never in reality been there, feel the sand "squeak a bit," *Thumbsup*

It does actually feel spiritual as you state.

Technically, the stream of though is effective, but may be more so if separated into a few sentences to focus the eye on the images you convey so well individually.

Thank you for sharing this experience.
Keep Writing!
Kate
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335
335
Rated: E | (4.5)
This is really beautiful, speaks from and to the spirit of the poet; the word images flow from one stanza to the next with poignant power.

When reading aloud, I feel the binding chains and the voice freed for a moment by the written word. The image stays with me after I have finished reading.

Reading aloud, I have but one comment on the depersonalization of the man "that" has toiled, perhaps consider "who" has toiled?
The pacing and beat is fairly even, each stanza leading to the next smoothly.

Thank you for sharing this provocative and powerful work.
Keep Writing!
Kate
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336
336
Review of Andrew  
Rated: ASR | (4.0)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


You convey Sage's loyalty and love very well, as well as a hint of regret at the lifestyle she is missing, along with the anger at her absent father, whose presence she thinks might have made things different, perhaps easier. She also has an acceptance of her life and 'attitude' which I like.

The story is well well told, with sufficient explanation of Andrew's illness and you provide a clue as to Ana's situation, and the ending choked me up both times I read the story.

I note there is a bit of telling instead of showing, for example, "The nighs at the shelter always consisted of Andrew sitting on the corner of the bed..." ~ consider rewording to put me there next to Andrew and Sage.

Also note a bit of variance in the point of view ~ i.e., the previous paragraph told in third person about Sage's mother.

You weave some really vivid insights into the thoughts and feelings of the characters, i.e., Andrew's friendship with the mailman and how well he new his dog*Star* ~ shows the real knowledge and experience you have*Thumbsup*

I note a few places where past and present tense conflict, and some of the sentence strucure, i.e., partial sentences. Also, starting several paragraphs in a row with "Ana"

But these do not detract from the beautiful story, told with insight, of friendship and loyalty that transcended poverty, social neglect. I really found myself liking the characters and you conveyed for them all both strength and weaknesses{e;star}

Thank you for offering this great read!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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337
337
Review of Sleep at last  
Rated: 13+ | (4.0)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


Your poem engages all my senses; visually very vivid and the beat of the lines and rhyming adds a sense of guns or beating of drums, soldiers marching *Thumbsup*

In reading aloud, there's a staccato beat to the whole poem, amplified by the comma separation within stanzas, the mahcine gun sound*Star* The beat of the lines is a bit uneven, and with the comma separation I would look for it to be more symmetrical.

In the fourth stanza, suggest for a bit more balance, delete "down" ~ see how it sounds to you, I don't believe it would detract from the visual image.

Also, "was lacked" in the next stanza seems to be set there for the rhyming?

Thank you for offering this thought provoking work!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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338
338
Review of On Being A Dad!  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


Each one of the images are so true for any parent ~ although you know when they really need somebody or are sick, then it's still "Daddy"

Reading aloud, the stanzas fit well together, comparing a past 'event' and its present counterpart*Thumbsup* The pacing was fairly even thoughout.

Your words entertain and delight^_^

Thank you for offering this great read!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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339
339
Review of content  
Rated: E | (3.5)
I like the way you start off nice and mellow, romantic, and then end tongue in cheek ~ nice twist

Reading aloud, there's a pleasing flow to the words, and the images are vivid, I can see the flashing orange and red in the fireplace*Thumbsup*

Suggested for your consideration, separate into two stanzas, with the second starting with "The fire flashes ...", see if you think they fit that was as individual images within the whole; I'm uncertain about ending two lines with the same word? "red"

Also in the beat of the lines (I'm figuring each comma would separate a line were this in stanzas), the beat falters a bit in one place for me, suggest "we push our worries aside" ??? and delete "will" from the final line.

Thank you for offering this great image poem*Smile*

Keep Writing!
Kate
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340
340
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


This is written with such vivid imagery ~ you truly speak words that must reach the spirit of every writer here!! The description of the process of how words come to life on paper, then the lament on how they are maniputated and cheapened by mass media; then returning to the strength of the written word. Each paragraph has a vivid and memorable conclusion, written in near poetic prose.

Your concluding statement lingers with me after I have finished reading.

Thank you for offering this great treatise on writing!

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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341
341
Rated: E | (4.0)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
Weekly NEWBIE Challenge  (E)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


This is a beautiful story of a lasting friendship ~ we choose our friends and hopefully treasure them as these two have shown ~ to last even past death ~ beautifully related here*Star*

I was slowed in a few places and offer a few suggestions here for your consideration. You open with a lot of names and I am a bit confused as to who is getting married, had to go back to reread that they both are ~ suggest something in the first paragraph to state that their weddings are planned for the same date? or for dates but a few weeks apart? which is why they are each shopping for a veil or headdress.

Also, a couple of places, I note dropped words in your upload, i.e., "Nadine extracted her purse from her inner pocket."

When you state that they were back in "regular clothes," perhaps describe ~ i.e., jeans, shorts, whatever they are wearing to show me.

Where "Eve followed, looking concerned." suggest a bit more show than tell, something perhaps like "Eve followed, frowning with concern." ???

Another dropped word, "Everythig is going according to plan."

The scene in the hospital, again, I had to reread to determine whose wedding would be moved up? perhaps another line of conversation, or description?

Also, when pinning on the veil, using the last name, perhaps instead identify Jean as Eve's second-best friend (if that's what she is?)...

Absolutely beautiful ending, stays with me, "the future that seemed to blend with the past as she carried both." ~ had to note it, it's so vivid*Heart*

Thank you for offering this great read!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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342
342
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


I was angered and saddened by your story, well told with honesty and passion. You interspersed facts with personal details very well, so it is one that many who have lost children in a similar manner can realte to*Star*

A few places slowed me just a bit technically, using "that" to describe people instead of "who" in several places, i.e. suggest something like "...in a home with parents who could take better care of them than us."

Also, "...someday they will want to see Howard and me again."


Thank you for offering this thought-provoking and heart rending work!

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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343
343
Review of Dexter  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


This is such a beautiful tribute to an obviously wonderful child; a love story pure and simple. The images you share add insight into both the condition and how you and Dexter have overcome it in your own way. The feelings they evoke stay with me after I have finished reading.

Reading aloud, the beat and flow are rather even; and each stanza gives me pause to reflect before sending me forward to seek the next image.

Thank you for sharing these beautiful images of pure love!

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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344
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Review of The Loner  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Tour words speak truth with such vivid imagery*Star* The lone poet or writer, whose spoken words go unheard, until the muse finally gives up.

Reading aloud, I am drawn into the images, the rhyming of key images is powerful. The image of the chair in the corner ~ there but invisible.

Reading aloud, I am slowed only a bit by the long first line, consider perhaps separating into two? for symmetry if you don't think it would detract from your image. Also, using "so" twice in a line "So he hates the world that is so cruel" ~ ??? just a couple thoughts from my muse to yours.

Thank you for sharing this powerfully written, provocative work. I look forward to reading more of your work.
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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345
345
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
Weekly NEWBIE Challenge  (E)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


Thank you for sharing this joyous reflection of love. Each stanza depicts an image I pause momentary with before being lead to the next image. Beautiful wish as well ~ to be able to love the thought of growing old with someone, with passion daily renewed.

Reading aloud, the phrasing and beat is fairly even and flows well in the conversational style you adopt.

Thank you for sharing this beautiful reflection!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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346
346
Review of Cloud Watching  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


So beautifully written, with such realism from the butterfly's point of view. I couldn't stop reading each time ~ and the images stay with me after i have finished.

One tiny thing, I suggest not giving it away ~ "...she began what might be the last flight she would take." ??? instead of being omniscient

Absolutely beautiful. Thank you for sharing.


Thank you for offering this great read!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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347
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Review of Crickets  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
Weekly NEWBIE Challenge  (E)
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


This is such a vivid image ~ going through the night with the chorus of crickets, to end in a mellow psalm as morning draws nigh *Star*

I'm left with a feeling of quiet joy after reading aloud.

Thank you for sharing your beautiful image in words.

Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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348
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Review of Sigh of Spring  
Rated: E | (4.5)
*Smile*Greetings! I'm one of the Reviewers for the *Down*
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#989394 by ~*~Damiana Returned~*~


*Smile*I enjoyed reading your entry - hope to see you in the next challenge*Smile*

*Star**Star**Star*


I enjoyed not only the word images, but the colors also setting the mood of spring ~ life itself wakening in colorful array*Smile*

The flow of the images, the beat of the stanzas is smooth,

some really wonderful images leave me smiling a moment after having finished my reading aloud*Star* bringing it all full circle with the butterfly ~ good touch...

Thank you for offering this great read!
Keep Writing!
Kate
wistful rune ~ …
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349
349
Rated: 18+ | (5.0)
Great idea ~ a wonderful sidebar to the contest forum for commiseration and fellowship after taking the daily plunge ^_^

Thanks for offering this challenge*Thumbsup*

Keep Writing!
Kate
Rune ~ taking chances
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350
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Review of Dad  
Rated: E | (4.5)
Obviously written with love ~ holding on to the last vestiges of who he is...

Reading aloud, much pathos, the disease is described all too well. Accurate use of the palindrome form; and the beat of the lines flows fairly smoothly.

Thank you for sharing this poignant work.
Keep Writing,
Kate
wistful rune
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